Begin Reading

开始阅读

Table of Contents

版权页

In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing

of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher constitute unlawful piracy and theft

of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for

review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at

permissions@hbgusa.com. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

根据 1976 年美国版权法，未经出版商许可，扫描、上传和电子共享本书的任何部分均构成非

法盗版和盗窃作者的知识产权。如果您想使用本书中的材料（用于审阅目的除外），必须事

先通过联系 permissions@hbgusa.com 的出版商获得书面许可。感谢您对作者权利的支持。

To LAURA

至

LAURA

Foreword

前言

TK 2 pages

TK 2 页

Preface

前言

This novel, which is here re-issued with many small additions and some

substantial cuts, lost me such esteem as I once enjoyed among my

contemporaries and led me into an unfamiliar world of fan-mail and press

photographers. Its theme—the operation of divine grace on a group of

diverse but closely connected characters—was perhaps presumptuously

large, but I make no apology for it. I am less happy about its form, whose

more glaring defects may be blamed on the circumstances in which it was

written.

这部小说在这里重新发行，增加了许多小的补充和一些实质性的删

减，使我失去了我曾经在同时代人中享有的尊重，并把我带入了一个

陌生的粉丝邮件和新闻摄影师的世界。它的主题——上帝恩典对一群

不同但密切相关的人物的运作——也许过于夸张，但我不为此道歉。

我对它的形式不太满意，其更明显的缺陷可能归咎于它写作的环境。

In December 1943 I had the good fortune when parachuting to incur a

minor injury which afforded me a rest from military service. This was

extended by a sympathetic commanding officer, who let me remain

unemployed until June 1944 when the book was finished. I wrote with a

zest that was quite strange to me and also with impatience to get back to the

war. It was a bleak period of present privation and threatening disaster—the

period of soya beans and Basic English—and in consequence the book is

infused with a kind of gluttony, for food and wine, for the splendors of the

recent past, and for rhetorical and ornamental language, which now with a

full stomach I find distasteful. I have modified the grosser passages but

have not obliterated them because they are an essential part of the book.

1943 年 12 月，我在跳伞时幸运地受了轻伤，这使我得以从兵役中

休息。一位富有同情心的指挥官延长了这一期限，他让我一直失业，

直到 1944 年 6 月这本书完成。我以一种对我来说很奇怪的热情写作，

也迫不及待地想回到战争中。那是一个凄凉的时期，现在匮乏和灾难

即将来临——大豆和基础英语的时期——因此，这本书充满了一种暴

饮暴食，对食物和酒，对近代的辉煌，以及修辞和装饰性语言，现在

我觉得肚子饱了，我觉得很讨厌。我修改了较粗略的段落，但并没有

抹去它们，因为它们是本书的重要组成部分。

I have been in two minds as to the treatment of Julia’s outburst about

mortal sin and Lord Marchmain’s dying soliloquy. These passages were

never, of course, intended to report words actually spoken. They belong to a

different way of writing from, say, the early scenes between Charles and his

father. I would not now introduce them into a novel which elsewhere aims

at verisimilitude. But I have retained them here in something near their

original form because, like the Burgundy (misprinted in many editions) and

the moonlight they were essentially of the mood of writing; also because

many readers liked them, though that is not a consideration of first

importance.

关于茱莉亚对致命罪恶的爆发和马奇曼勋爵临终独白的处理，我一

直有两种想法。当然，这些经文从来都不是要报告实际说出的话。它

们属于一种不同的写作方式，例如，查尔斯和他父亲之间的早期场

景。我现在不会把它们介绍到一部其他地方旨在逼真的小说中。但我

在这里保留了它们的原始形式，因为就像勃艮第（在许多版本中印刷

错误）和月光一样，它们本质上是写作的情绪;也是因为许多读者喜欢

它们，尽管这不是最重要的考虑因素。

It was impossible to foresee, in the spring of 1944, the present cult of the

English country house. It seemed then that the ancestral seats which were

our chief national artistic achievement were doomed to decay and spoliation

like the monasteries in the sixteenth century. So I piled it on rather, with

passionate sincerity. Brideshead today would be open to trippers, its

treasures rearranged by expert hands and the fabric better maintained than it

was by Lord Marchmain. And the English aristocracy has maintained its

identity to a degree that then seemed impossible. The advance of Hooper

has been held up at several points. Much of this book therefore is a

panegyric preached over an empty coffin. But it would be impossible to

bring it up to date without totally destroying it. It is offered to a younger

generation of readers as a souvenir of the Second War rather than of the

twenties or of the thirties, with which it ostensibly deals.

在 1944 年春天，不可能预见到目前对英国乡间别墅的崇拜。那时

看来，作为我们国家主要艺术成就的祖传座位注定要像十六世纪的修

道院一样腐朽和掠夺。于是，我怀着热情的诚意，把它堆积起来。今

天的布里德斯黑德将向游客开放，它的宝藏由专家之手重新排列，织

物比马奇曼勋爵维护得更好。英国贵族在一定程度上保持了自己的身

份，这在当时似乎是不可能的。胡珀的前进在几个点上受到阻碍。因

此，这本书的大部分内容都是在空棺材上宣讲的诗歌。但是，如果不

完全摧毁它，就不可能使它更新。它是作为第二次世界大战的纪念品

提供给年轻一代的读者的，而不是它表面上处理的二十年代或三十年

代的纪念品。

E. W.

E.W.

Combe Florey 1959

科姆·弗洛里 1959

Prologue

序幕

Brideshead Revisited

重访新娘头

When I reached “C” Company lines, which were at the top of the hill, I

paused and looked back at the camp, just coming into full view below me

through the gray mist of early morning. We were leaving that day. When we

marched in, three months before, the place was under snow; now the first

leaves of spring were unfolding. I had reflected then that, whatever scenes

of desolation lay ahead of us, I never feared one more brutal than this, and I

reflected now that it had no single happy memory for me.

当我到达山顶的“C”连线时，我停了下来，回头看了看营地，透过清

晨的灰雾，我正完全看到营地。那天我们就要离开了。三个月前，当

我们进军时，这个地方正在下雪;现在，春天的第一片叶子正在展开。

那时我反思说，无论我们面前是怎样的荒凉景象，我从未害怕过比这

更残酷的景象，我现在回想起来，它对我来说没有任何快乐的记忆。

Here love had died between me and the Army.

在这里，我和军队之间的爱情已经死了。

Here the tram lines ended, so that men returning fuddled from Glasgow

could doze in their seats until roused by their journey’s end. There was

some way to go from the tram-stop to the camp gates; quarter of a mile in

which they could button their blouses and straighten their caps before

passing the guard-room, quarter of a mile in which concrete gave place to

grass at the road’s edge. This was the extreme limit of the city. Here the

close, homogeneous territory of housing estates and cinemas ended and the

hinterland began.

电车线路在这里结束了，所以从格拉斯哥回来的人可以在座位上打

瞌睡，直到他们的旅程结束。从电车站到营地大门有一段路要走;在四

分之一英里的路程中，他们可以扣上衬衫的扣子，在经过警卫室之前

拉直帽子，在四分之一英里的路程中，混凝土让位于路边的草地。这

是这座城市的极限。在这里，住宅区和电影院的紧密、同质的领土结

束了，腹地开始了。

The camp stood where, until quite lately, had been pasture and

plowland; the farmhouse still stood in a fold of the hill and had served us

for battalion offices; ivy still supported part of what had once been the walls

of a fruit garden; half an acre of mutilated old trees behind the wash-houses

survived of an orchard. The place had been marked for destruction before

the army came to it. Had there been another year of peace, there would have

been no farmhouse, no wall, no apple trees. Already half a mile of concrete

road lay between bare clay banks, and on either side a checker of open

ditches showed where the municipal contractors had designed a system of

drainage. Another year of peace would have made the place part of the

neighboring suburb. Now the huts where we had wintered waited their turn

for destruction.

直到最近，营地还是牧场和犁地;农舍仍然矗立在山丘的褶皱中，

曾为我们服务过营办公室;常春藤仍然支撑着曾经是果园墙壁的一部

分;盥洗室后面的半英亩残缺不全的老树幸免于难。在军队到来之前，

这个地方已经被标记为要摧毁。如果再有一年的和平，就不会有农

舍，没有围墙，没有苹果树。裸露的粘土堤岸之间已经有半英里长的

水泥路，两边的开放式沟渠显示了市政承包商设计排水系统的地方。

再过一年的和平将使这个地方成为邻近郊区的一部分。现在，我们过

冬的小屋等待着被摧毁。

Over the way, the subject of much ironical comment, half hidden even in

winter by its embosoming trees, lay the municipal lunatic asylum, whose

cast-iron railings and noble gates put our rough wire to shame. We could

watch the madmen, on clement days, sauntering and skipping among the

trim gravel walks and pleasantly planted lawns; happy collaborationists

who had given up the unequal struggle, all doubts resolved, all duty done,

the undisputed heirs-at-law of a century of progress, enjoying the heritage

at their ease. As we marched past, the men used to shout greetings to them

through the railings—“Keep a bed warm for me, chum. I shan’t be long”—

but Hooper, my newest-joined platoon-commander, grudged them their life

of privilege; “Hitler would put them in a gas chamber,” he said; “I reckon

we can learn a thing or two from him.”

一路上，许多具有讽刺意味的评论的主题，即使在冬天也被它的树

木遮住了一半，是市政疯人院，它的铸铁栏杆和高贵的大门让我们粗

糙的铁丝网感到羞耻。在晴朗的日子里，我们可以看到疯子们在修剪

整齐的砾石步道和宜人的草坪上闲逛和跳跃;快乐的合作者放弃了不平

等的斗争，所有的疑虑都解决了，所有的职责都完成了，一个世纪进

步的无可争议的继承人，安心地享受着遗产。当我们走过时，男人们

常常隔着栏杆向他们打招呼——“给我保暖，哼。我活不了多久了

“——可是我新加入的排长胡珀却对他们的特权生活感到不满;“希特勒

会把他们关进毒气室，”他说;“我想我们可以从他身上学到一两件事。

Here, when we marched in at mid-winter, I brought a company of strong

and hopeful men; word had gone round among them, as we moved from the

moors to this dockland area, that we were at last in transit for the Middle

East. As the days passed and we began clearing the snow and leveling a

parade ground, I saw their disappointment change to resignation. They

snuffed the smell of the fried-fish shops and cocked their ears to familiar,

peace-time sounds of the works’ siren and the dance-hall band. On off-days

they slouched now at street corners and sidled away at the approach of an

officer for fear that, by saluting, they would lose face with their new

mistresses. In the company office there was a crop of minor charges and

requests for compassionate leave; while it was still half-light, day began

with the whine of the malingerer and the glum face and fixed eye of the

man with a grievance.

在这里，当我们在隆冬进军时，我带来了一队强壮而充满希望的

人;当我们从沼泽地转移到这个码头区时，他们中间已经传开了消息，

我们终于要前往中东了。随着时间的流逝，我们开始清理积雪并平整

阅兵场，我看到他们的失望变成了辞职。他们嗅到了炸鱼店的气味，

竖起耳朵听着熟悉的、和平时期的警笛声和舞厅乐队的声音。在休息

日，他们现在懒洋洋地呆在街角，对一个军官的接近不屑一顾，生怕

敬礼会让他们在新情妇面前丢脸。在公司办公室里，有一大堆小费用

和同情假的请求;趁着天还亮着半天，白天就开始了，那人发出了呜的

呜呜声，脸上带着委屈的表情和坚定的眼神。

And I, who by every precept should have put heart into them—how

could I help them, who could so little help myself? Here the colonel under

whom we had formed, was promoted out of our sight and succeeded by a

younger and less lovable man, cross-posted from another regiment. There

were few left in the mess now of the batch of volunteers who trained

together at the outbreak of war; one way and another they were nearly all

gone—some had been invalided out, some promoted to other battalions,

some posted to staff jobs, some had volunteered for special service, one had

got himself killed on the field firing range, one had been court-martialed—

and their places were taken by conscripts; the wireless played incessantly in

the ante-room nowadays, and much beer was drunk before dinner; it was

not as it had been.

而我，按照每条戒律，我都应该全心全意地投入他们——我怎么能

帮助他们呢，谁能帮助自己呢？在这里，我们组建的上校从我们的视

线中被提，并由一个更年轻、更不可爱的人接替，他从另一个团交叉

派来。现在，在战争爆发时一起训练的那批志愿者已经所剩无几了;不

管怎样，他们几乎都消失了——有的被取消了，有的被提拔到其他

营，有的被派往参谋岗位，有的自愿参加特殊服务，有的在野战射击

场被杀，有的被军事法庭审判——他们的位置被应征入伍者取代;如

今，前厅里不停地播放着无线音乐，晚饭前喝了很多啤酒;它不像以前

那样。

Here at the age of thirty-nine I began to be old. I felt stiff and weary in

the evenings and reluctant to go out of camp; I developed proprietary

claims to certain chairs and newspapers; I regularly drank three glasses of

gin before dinner, never more or less, and went to bed immediately after the

nine o’clock news. I was always awake and fretful an hour before reveille.

在我三十九岁的时候，我开始变老。晚上我感到僵硬和疲惫，不愿

意离开营地;我对某些椅子和报纸提出了所有权要求;我经常在晚饭前

喝三杯杜松子酒，从不多喝或少喝，九点新闻后立即上床睡觉。我总

是在狂欢前一小时清醒而烦躁。

Here my last love died. There was nothing remarkable in the manner of

its death. One day, not long before this last day in camp, as I lay awake

before reveille, in the Nissen hut, gazing into the complete blackness, amid

the deep breathing and muttering of the four other occupants, turning over

in my mind what I had to do that day—had I put in the names of two

corporals for the weapon-training course? Should I again have the largest

number of men overstaying their leave in the batch due back that day?

Could I trust Hooper to take the candidates class out map-reading?—as I

lay in that dark hour, I was aghast to realize that something within me, long

sickening, had quietly died, and felt as a husband might feel, who, in the

fourth year of his marriage, suddenly knew that he had no longer any desire,

or tenderness, or esteem, for a once-beloved wife; no pleasure in her

company, no wish to please, no curiosity about anything she might ever do

or say or think; no hope of setting things right, no self-reproach for the

disaster. I knew it all, the whole drab compass of marital disillusion; we had

been through it together, the Army and I, from the first importunate

courtship until now, when nothing remained to us except the chill bonds of

law and duty and custom. I had played every scene in the domestic tragedy,

had found the early tiffs become more frequent, the tears less affecting, the

reconciliations less sweet, till they engendered a mood of aloofness and

cool criticism, and the growing conviction that it was not myself but the

loved one who was at fault. I caught the false notes in her voice and learned

to listen for them apprehensively; I recognized the blank, resentful stare of

incomprehension in her eyes, and the selfish, hard set of the corners of her

mouth. I learned her, as one must learn a woman one has kept house with,

day in, day out, for three and a half years; I learned her slatternly ways, the

routine and mechanism of her charm, her jealousy and self-seeking, and her

nervous trick with the fingers when she was lying. She was stripped of all

enchantment now and I knew her for an uncongenial stranger to whom I

had bound myself indissolubly in a moment of folly.

在这里，我最后的爱死了。它的死亡方式并没有什么了不起的。有

一天，在营地的最后一天前不久，当我在尼森小屋里醒来时，凝视着

完全的黑暗，在另外四个人的深呼吸和喃喃自语中，我脑海中回想着

那天我必须做什么——我有没有把两个下士的名字写在武器训练班

上？我是否应该再次让当天到期的批次中逾期居留的男性人数最多？

我能相信胡珀会带考生们去读地图吗？——当我躺在那个黑暗的时刻

时，我惊奇地发现，我内心深处的某种东西，长期令人作呕，已经悄

悄地死去，感觉就像一个丈夫的感觉，在他结婚的第四年，他突然知

道他不再有任何欲望了，或温柔，或尊重，对曾经心爱的妻子;在她的

陪伴中没有乐趣，没有取悦的愿望，对她可能做的任何事、说的事或

想的任何事情都没有好奇心;没有纠正事情的希望，没有对灾难的自

责。我知道这一切，婚姻幻灭的整个单调指南针;我们一起经历过，军

队和我，从第一次重要的求爱到现在，除了法律、责任和习俗的冰冷

纽带之外，我们什么都没有留下。我演过家庭悲剧中的每一个场景，

发现早期的争吵变得更加频繁，眼泪的情感越来越少，和解的甜蜜也

越来越少，直到它们产生了一种冷漠和冷静批评的情绪，并且越来越

确信错的不是我自己，而是所爱的人。我捕捉到她声音中的虚假音

符，并学会了忐忑不安地倾听它们;我认出了她眼中茫然、怨恨的不理

解目光，以及她嘴角的自私、坚硬。我学会了她，就像一个人必须学

会一个女人一样，日复一日，日复一日，三年半;我学会了她的放荡方

式，她的魅力的套路和机制，她的嫉妒和自我追求，以及她撒谎时用

手指紧张的把戏。她现在被剥夺了所有的魔力，我知道她是一个不合

群的陌生人，我在愚蠢的时刻将自己牢牢地束缚住了。

So, on this morning of our move, I was entirely indifferent as to our

destination. I would go on with my job, but I could bring to it nothing more

than acquiescence. Our orders were to entrain at 0915 hours at a nearby

siding, taking in the haversack the unexpired portion of the day’s ration;

that was all I needed to know. The company second-in-command had gone

on with a small advance party. Company stores had been packed the day

before. Hooper had been detailed to inspect the lines. The company was

parading at 0730 hours with their kit-bags piled before the huts. There had

been many such moves since the wildly exhilarating morning in 1940 when

we had erroneously believed ourselves destined for the defense of Calais.

Three or four times a year since then we had changed our location; this time

our new commanding officer was making an unusual display of “security”

and had even put us to the trouble of removing all distinguishing badges

from our uniforms and transport. It was “valuable training in active service

conditions,” he said. “If I find any of these female camp followers waiting

for us the other end, I’ll know there’s been a leakage.”

所以，在我们搬家的这个早晨，我对我们的目的地完全漠不关心。

我会继续我的工作，但我只能默许它。我们的命令是在 0915 时在附近

的一个侧壁夹带，将当天口粮中未过期的部分收进哈弗萨克;这就是我

需要知道的一切。连队的二把手带着一支小的先遣队继续前进。公司

商店在前一天已经挤满了人。胡珀已经详细检查了这些线路。该公司

在0730时游行，他们的工具包堆在小屋前。自从1940年那个令人振奋

的早晨以来，已经发生了许多这样的行动，当时我们错误地认为自己

注定要保卫加莱。从那时起，我们每年更换三到四次地点;这一次，我

们的新指挥官表现出了不同寻常的“安全”，甚至让我们不得不从制服

和交通工具上取下所有可识别的徽章。他说，这是“在现役条件下的宝

贵训练”。“如果我发现这些女性营地追随者中的任何一个在另一端等

着我们，我就会知道有泄漏。

The smoke from the cook-houses drifted away in the mist and the camp

lay revealed as a planless maze of short-cuts, superimposed on the

unfinished housing-scheme, as though disinterred at a much later date by a

party of archaeologists.

炊事室的烟雾在雾气中飘散，营地被揭示为一个没有计划的捷径迷

宫，叠加在未完成的住房计划上，仿佛在很久以后被一群考古学家拆

开。

“The Pollock diggings provide a valuable link between the citizen-slave

communities of the twentieth century and the tribal anarchy which

succeeded them. Here you see a people of advanced culture, capable of an

elaborate draining system and the construction of permanent highways,

over-run by a race of the lowest type.”

“

波洛克的挖掘在二十世纪的公民奴隶社区和继任他们的部落无政

府状态之间提供了宝贵的联系。在这里，你会看到一个具有先进文化

的民族，能够建造一个精心设计的排水系统和永久性高速公路，被一

个最低级的种族所淹没。

Thus, I thought, the pundits of the future might write; and, turning away,

I greeted the company sergeant-major: “Has Mr. Hooper been round?”

因此，我想，未来的专家可能会写作;然后，我转身离开，向连队

军士长打招呼：“胡珀先生来了吗？

“Haven’t seen him at all this morning, sir.”

“今天早上根本没见到他，先生。”

We went to the dismantled company office, where I found a window

newly broken since the barrack-damages book was completed. “Wind-in-

the-night, sir,” said the sergeant-major.

我们去了被拆毁的连队办公室，在那里我发现了一扇窗户，自从营

房损坏书完成后，窗户刚刚被打破。“夜里风，长官，”军士长说。

(All breakages were thus attributable or to “Sappers’-demonstration,

sir.”)

（因此，所有破损都归咎于“工兵示威，先生”。

Hooper appeared; he was a sallow youth with hair combed back, without

parting, from his forehead, and a flat, Midland accent; he had been in the

company two months.

胡珀出现了;他是一个蜡黄的青年，头发从额头向后梳理，没有分

开，带着平淡的米德兰口音;他在公司工作了两个月。

The troops did not like Hooper because he knew too little about his work

and would sometimes address them individually as “George” at stand-

easies, but I had a feeling which almost amounted to affection for him,

largely by reason of an incident on his first evening in mess.

部队不喜欢胡珀，因为他对自己的工作知之甚少，有时在看台上会

单独称呼他们为“乔治”，但我有一种感觉，几乎等同于对他的喜爱，

主要是因为他第一天晚上在混乱中发生的一件事。

The new colonel had been with us less than a week at the time and we

had not yet taken his measure. He had been standing rounds of gin in the

ante-room and was slightly boisterous when he first took notice of Hooper.

新上校当时和我们在一起还不到一个星期，我们还没有采取他的措

施。他一直在前厅里站着喝杜松子酒，当他第一次注意到胡珀时，他

有点喧闹。

“That young officer is one of yours, isn’t he, Ryder?” he said to me.

“His hair wants cutting.”

“那个年轻的军官是你的，不是吗，莱德？”他对我说。“他的头发

要剪。”

“It does, sir,” I said. It did. “I’ll see that it’s done.”

“是的，先生，”我说。它做到了。 “我会看到它完成了。”

The colonel drank more gin and began to stare at Hooper, saying

audibly, “My God, the officers they send us now!”

上校喝了更多的杜松子酒，开始盯着胡珀，声音很大，说：“我的

上帝，他们现在派来的军官！

Hooper seemed to obsess the colonel that evening. After dinner he

suddenly said very loudly: “In my late regiment if a young officer turned up

like that, the other subalterns would bloody well have cut his hair for him.”

那天晚上，胡珀似乎迷住了上校。晚饭后，他突然大声说：“在我

这个团里，如果一个年轻军官出现这样，其他副官会为他剪头发的。

No one showed any enthusiasm for this sport, and our lack of response

seemed to inflame the colonel. “You,” he said, turning to a decent boy in

“A” Company, “go and get a pair of scissors and cut that young officer’s

hair for him.”

没有人对这项运动表现出任何热情，我们缺乏回应似乎激怒了上

校。“你，”他说，转向“A”连的一个体面的男孩，“去拿一把剪刀，给

那个年轻军官剪头发。

“Is that an order, sir?”

“这是命令吗，先生？”

“It’s your commanding officer’s wish and that’s the best kind of order I

know.”

“这是你们指挥官的愿望，这是我所知道的最好的命令。

“Very good, sir.”

“很好，先生。”

And so, in an atmosphere of chilly embarrassment, Hooper sat in a chair

while a few snips were made at the back of his head. At the beginning of

the operation I left the ante-room, and later apologized to Hooper for his

reception. “It’s not the sort of thing that usually happens in this regiment,” I

said.

于是，在一种寒冷的尴尬气氛中，胡珀坐在椅子上，在他的后脑勺

上剪了几下。在手术开始时，我离开了前厅，后来向胡珀道歉。“这不

是这个团里通常发生的那种事情，”我说。

“Oh, no hard feelings,” said Hooper. “I can take a bit of sport.”

“哦，没有难受的感觉，”胡珀说。“我可以做一点运动。”

Hooper had no illusions about the Army—or rather no special illusions

distinguishable from the general, enveloping fog from which he observed

the universe. He had come to it reluctantly, under compulsion, after he had

made every feeble effort in his power to obtain deferment. He accepted it,

he said, “like the measles.” Hooper was no romantic. He had not as a child

ridden with Rupert’s horse or sat among the camp fires at Xanthus-side; at

the age when my eyes were dry to all save poetry—that stoic, red-skin

interlude which our schools introduce between the fast-flowing tears of the

child and the man—Hooper had wept often, but never for Henry’s speech

on St. Crispin’s day, nor for the epitaph at Thermopylae. The history they

taught him had had few battles in it but, instead, a profusion of detail about

humane legislation and recent industrial change. Gallipoli, Balaclava,

Quebec, Lepanto, Bannockburn, Roncevales and Marathon—these, and the

Battle in the West where Arthur fell, and a hundred such names whose

trumpet-notes, even now in my sere and lawless state, called to me

irresistibly across the intervening years with all the clarity and strength of

boyhood, sounded in vain to Hooper.

胡珀对军队没有幻想，或者更确切地说，没有与他观察宇宙的一般

笼罩的迷雾区分开来的特殊幻想。他是在强迫下不情愿地来到这里

的，在他竭尽全力争取延期之后。他说，他接受了它，“就像麻疹一

样”。胡珀并不浪漫。他小时候没有骑过鲁珀特的马，也没有坐在桑图

斯边的篝火旁;在我眼睛干涩的年纪，除了诗歌——我们的学校在孩子

和男人快速流淌的眼泪之间引入的那种坚忍的、红皮肤的插曲——胡

珀经常哭泣，但从来没有因为亨利在圣克里斯平节的演讲而哭泣，也

没有为温泉关的墓志铭哭泣。他们教给他的历史中几乎没有战斗，相

反，关于人道立法和最近工业变革的大量细节。加里波利、巴拉克拉

瓦、魁北克、勒班陀、班诺克本、龙塞瓦莱斯和马拉松——这些，还

有亚瑟陷落的西部战役，还有一百个这样的名字，他们的号角，即使

现在在我平静和无法无天的状态下，在随后的岁月里，以少年时代的

所有清晰和力量不可抗拒地召唤着我，对胡珀来说是徒劳的。

He seldom complained. Though himself a man to whom one could not

confidently entrust the simplest duty, he had an over-mastering regard for

efficiency and, drawing on his modest commercial experience, he would

sometimes say of the ways of the Army in pay and supply and the use of

‘man-hours’: “They couldn’t get away with that in business.”

他很少抱怨。尽管他本人不能自信地将最简单的职责托付给他，但

他对效率有着过分的重视，并且凭借他微薄的商业经验，他有时会谈

到军队在工资和供应以及“工时”使用方面的方式：“他们在商业上无法

逃脱这一点。

He slept sound while I lay awake fretting.

他睡得很香，而我却睡得很烦。

In the weeks that we were together Hooper became a symbol to me of

Young England, so that whenever I read some public utterance proclaiming

what Youth demanded in the Future and what the world owed to Youth, I

would test these general statements by substituting ‘Hooper’ and seeing if

they still seemed as plausible. Thus in the dark hour before reveille I

sometimes pondered: “Hooper Rallies,” “Hooper Hostels,” “International

Hooper Cooperation,” and “the Religion of Hooper.” He was the acid test of

all these alloys.

在我们在一起的几个星期里，胡珀成了我年轻英格兰的象征，所以

每当我读到一些公开的言论，宣称青年对未来的要求以及世界对青年

的亏欠时，我都会用“胡珀”来测试这些一般性陈述，看看它们是否仍

然看起来合理。因此，在揭幕前的黑暗时刻，我有时会沉思：“胡珀集

会”、“胡珀旅馆”、“国际胡珀合作”和“胡珀的宗教”。他是所有这些合

金的酸性测试。

So far as he had changed at all, he was less soldierly now than when he

arrived from his OCTU. This morning, laden with full equipment, he

looked scarcely human. He came to attention with a kind of shuffling

dance-step and spread a wool-gloved palm across his forehead.

就他完全改变而言，他现在不像他从OCTU回来时那样有军人气

质。今天早上，他满载着全套装备，看起来几乎不像人。他以一种拖

沓的舞步引起了人们的注意，并在他的额头上摊开了一只戴着羊毛手

套的手掌。

“I want to speak to Mr. Hooper, sergeant-major… well, where the devil

have you been? I told you to inspect the lines.”

“我想和胡珀先生谈谈，军士长......那么，你去哪儿了？我叫你检查

一下线路。

“’M I late? Sorry. Had a rush getting my gear together.”

“我迟到了吗？不好意思。匆匆忙忙地把我的装备放在一起。

“That’s what you have a servant for.”

“这就是你找仆人的目的。”

“Well, I suppose it is, strictly speaking. But you know how it is. He had

his own stuff to do. If you get on the wrong side of these fellows they take it

out of you other ways.”

“嗯，我想是，严格来说。但你知道它是怎么回事。他有自己的事

情要做。如果你站在这些家伙的错误一边，他们会以其他方式从你身

上夺走它。

“Well, go and inspect the lines now.”

“嗯，现在去检查线路。”

“Rightyoh.”

“对了。”

“And for Christ’s sake don’t say ‘rightyoh.’ ”

“看在基督的份上，不要说'对呀'。"

“Sorry. I do try to remember. It just slips out.”

“对不起。我试着记住。它只是溜走了。

When Hooper left the sergeant-major returned.

胡珀离开后，军士长回来了。

“C.O. just coming up the path, sir,” he said.

“C.O.刚走过来，先生，”他说。

I went out to meet him.

我出去见他。

There were beads of moisture on the hog-bristles of his little red

moustache.

他那红色小胡子的猪鬃上有水珠。

“Well, everything squared up here?”

“嗯，这里一切都好了？”

“Yes, I think so, sir.”

“是的，我想是的，先生。”

“Think so? You ought to know.”

“你以为是这样吗？你应该知道的。

His eyes fell on the broken window. “Has that been entered in the

barrack damages?”

他的目光落在破碎的窗户上。“这已经记入了军营的损失吗？”

“Not yet, sir.”

“还没有，先生。”

“Not yet? I wonder when it would have been, if I hadn’t seen it.”

“还没有？我想知道如果我没有看到它，它会是什么时候。

He was not at ease with me, and much of his bluster rose from timidity,

but I thought none the better of it for that.

他对我不放心，他的咆哮很大程度上是出于胆怯，但我认为没有比

这更好的了。

He led me behind the huts to a wire fence which divided my area from

the carrier-platoon’s, skipped briskly over, and made for an overgrown ditch

and bank which had once been a field boundary on the farm. Here he began

grubbing with his walking-stick like a truffling pig and presently gave a cry

of triumph. He had disclosed one of those deposits of rubbish, which are

dear to the private soldier’s sense of order: the head of a broom, the lid of a

stove, a bucket rusted through, a sock, a loaf of bread, lay under the dock

and nettle among cigarette packets and empty tins.

他把我领到小屋后面的铁丝网前，铁丝网把我的区域和运输排的区

域隔开，轻快地跳过，形成了一条杂草丛生的沟渠和堤岸，这里曾经

是农场的田地边界。在这里，他开始像松露猪一样用拐杖蹭，现在发

出了胜利的呼喊。他揭露了其中一堆垃圾，这些垃圾对私人士兵的秩

序感来说是很珍贵的：扫帚的头，炉盖，生锈的水桶，一只袜子，一

条面包，躺在码头下，荨麻在香烟盒和空罐子之间。

“Look at that,” said the commanding officer. “Fine impression that gives

to the regiment taking over from us.”

“瞧瞧，”指挥官说。“给接替我们的团留下了很好的印象。”

“That’s bad,” I said.

“这很糟糕，”我说。

“It’s a disgrace. See everything there is burned before you leave camp.”

“这是一种耻辱。在你离开营地之前，看看那里的所有东西都被烧

毁了。

“Very good, sir. Sergeant-major, send over to the carrier-platoon and tell

Captain Brown that the C.O. wants this ditch cleared up.”

“很好，先生。军士长，派人去运输排，告诉布朗上尉，C.O.要清

理这条沟渠。

I wondered whether the colonel would take this rebuff; so did he. He

stood a moment irresolutely prodding the muck in the ditch, then he turned

on his heel and strode away.

我想知道上校是否会接受这种拒绝;他也是。他站了一会儿，毅然

决然地戳了戳沟里的淤泥，然后他转身大步离开了。

“You shouldn’t do it, sir,” said the sergeant-major, who had been my

guide and prop since I joined the company. “You shouldn’t really.”

“你不应该这样做，长官，”军士长说，自从我加入连队以来，他一

直是我的向导和支持者。“你真的不应该。”

“That wasn’t our rubbish.”

“那不是我们的垃圾。”

“Maybe not, sir, but you know how it is. If you get on the wrong side of

senior officers they take it out of you other ways.”

“也许不是，先生，但你知道是怎么回事。如果你站在高级官员的

错误一边，他们会以其他方式从你身上夺走它。

As we marched past the madhouse, two or three elderly inmates gibbered

and mouthed politely behind the railings.

当我们走过疯人院时，两三个年长的囚犯在栏杆后面喋喋不休，礼貌

地叽叽喳喳。

“Cheeroh, chum, we’ll be seeing you”; “We shan’t be long now”; “Keep

smiling till we meet again,” the men called to them.

“哎呀，哎呀，我们再见”;“我们现在不会太久了”;“保持微笑，直到

我们再次见面，”男人们对他们喊道。

I was marching with Hooper at the head of the leading platoon.

我和胡珀一起行进在领先排的前面。

“I say, any idea where we’re off to?”

“我说，知道我们要去哪里吗？”

“None.”

“没有。”

“D’you think it’s the real thing?”

“你以为这是真的吗？”

“No.”

“没有。”

“Just a flap?”

“只是一个襟翼？”

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Everyone’s been saying we’re for it. I don’t know what to think really.

Seems so silly somehow, all this drill and training if we never go into

action.”

“每个人都在说我们支持它。我真的不知道该怎么想。不知何故，

所有这些演习和训练似乎都很愚蠢，如果我们从不采取行动。

“I shouldn’t worry. There’ll be plenty for everyone in time.”

“我不用担心。到时候每个人都会有很多。

“Oh, I don’t want much you know. Just enough to say I’ve been in it.”

“哦，我不想知道太多。足以说我去过它。

A train of antiquated coaches was waiting for us at the siding; an R.T.O.

was in charge; a fatigue party was loading the last of the kit-bags from the

trucks to the luggage vans. In half an hour we were ready to start and in an

hour we started.

一列陈旧的客车在侧边等着我们;一个 R.T.O. 负责;一个疲惫的派对

正在将最后一个工具包从卡车上装载到行李车上。半小时后，我们准

备好开始了，一个小时后我们开始了。

My three platoon commanders and myself had a carriage to ourselves.

They ate sandwiches and chocolate, smoked and slept. None of them had a

book. For the first three or four hours they noted the names of the towns

and leaned out of the windows when, as often happened, we stopped

between stations. Later they lost interest. At midday and again at dark some

tepid cocoa was ladled from a container into our mugs. The train moved

slowly south through flat, drab main-line scenery.

我和我的三个排长有一辆马车。他们吃三明治和巧克力，抽烟睡

觉。他们都没有一本书。在最初的三四个小时里，他们记下了城镇的

名字，并像往常一样，当我们在车站之间停下来时，他们从窗户探出

身子。后来他们失去了兴趣。中午和天黑时分，一些温热的可可从容

器中舀到我们的杯子里。火车缓缓向南行驶，穿过平坦、单调的主线

风景。

The chief incident in the day was the C.O.’s “order group.” We

assembled in his carriage, at the summons of an orderly, and found him and

the adjutant wearing their steel helmets and equipment. The first thing he

said was: “This is an Order Group. I expect you to attend properly dressed.

The fact that we happen to be in a train is immaterial.” I thought he was

going to send us back but, after glaring at us, he said, “Sit down.”

当天的主要事件是C.O.的“订单组”。我们在他的马车里集合，在一

个秩序的召唤下，发现他和副官戴着他们的钢盔和装备。他说的第一

句话是：“这是一个秩序组。我希望你穿着得体。我们碰巧在火车上这

一事实无关紧要。我以为他会送我们回去，但瞪了我们一眼后，他

说：“坐下。

“The camp was left in a disgraceful condition. Wherever I went I found

evidence that officers are not doing their duty. The state in which a camp is

left is the best possible test of the efficiency of regimental officers. It is on

such matters that the reputation of a battalion and its commander rests.

And”—did he in fact say this or am I finding words for the resentment in

his voice and eye? I think he left it unsaid—“I do not intend to have my

professional reputation compromised by the slackness of a few temporary

officers.”

“营地处于可耻的状态。无论我走到哪里，我都发现了军官没有尽

职尽责的证据。离开营地的状态是对团级军官效率的最好考验。正是

在这些问题上，一个营及其指挥官的声誉才得以建立。而且“——他真

的这么说了，还是我从他的声音和眼神中找到了怨恨的词语？我想他

没有说——“我不打算因为少数临时军官的懈怠而损害我的职业声誉。

We sat with our note-books and pencils waiting to take down the details

of our next jobs. A more sensitive man would have seen that he had failed

to be impressive; perhaps he saw, for he added in a petulant schoolmasterish

way: “All I ask is loyal cooperation.”

我们拿着笔记本和铅笔坐着，等着记下下一份工作的细节。一个更

敏感的人会发现他没有给人留下深刻印象;也许他看到了，因为他以一

种任性的校长的方式补充说：“我只要求忠诚的合作。

Then he referred to his notes and read:

然后他提到他的笔记并读到：

“Orders.

“命令。

“Information. The battalion is now in transit between location A and

location B. This is a major L of C and is liable to bombing and gas attack

from the enemy.

“信息。该营目前在A地点和B地点之间过境。这是C的主要L，容易

受到敌人的轰炸和毒气攻击。

“Intention. I intend to arrive at location B.

“意图。我打算到达地点 B。

“Method. Train will arrive at destination at approximately 2315

hours…” and so on.

“方法。火车将在大约2315小时到达目的地......”等等。

The sting came at the end under the heading, “Administration.” “C”

Company, less one platoon, was to unload the train on arrival at the siding

where three three-tonners would be available for moving all stores to a

battalion dump in the new camp; work to continue until completed; the

remaining platoon was to find a guard on the dump and perimeter sentries

for the camp area.

刺痛出现在标题“管理”的最后。“C”连，少了一个排，将在到达侧

线时卸下火车，那里有三辆三吨重的火车，可以将所有物资运送到新

营地的一个营垃圾场;工作继续进行，直至完成;剩下的排将在垃圾场

寻找警卫和营地的外围哨兵。

“Any questions?”

“有什么问题吗？”

“Can we have an issue of cocoa for the working party?”

“我们能为工作组提供可可问题吗？”

“No. Any more questions?”

“不。还有什么问题吗？

When I told the sergeant-major of these orders he said: “Poor old ‘C’

Company struck unlucky again”; and I knew this to be a reproach for my

having antagonized the commanding officer.

当我把这些命令告诉军士长时，他说：“可怜的老'C'连又倒霉了”;我

知道这是对我惹怒指挥官的羞辱。

I told the platoon commanders.

我告诉排长。

“I say,” said Hooper, “it makes it awfully awkward with the chaps.

They’ll be fairly browned off. He always seems to pick on us for the dirty

work.”

“我说，”胡珀说，“这让小伙子们非常尴尬。它们会变成褐色。他

似乎总是挑剔我们的肮脏工作。

“You’ll do guard.”

“你会做守卫的。”

“Okeydoke. But I say, how am I to find the perimeter in the dark?”

“奥基多克。但我说，我怎么能在黑暗中找到边界呢？

Shortly after blackout we were disturbed by an orderly making his way

lugubriously down the length of the train with a rattle. One of the more

sophisticated sergeants called out “Deuxième service.”

停电后不久，我们被一个有秩序的人打扰了，他带着嘎嘎声在火车

上晃晃悠悠地走着。其中一名更老练的中士喊道：“Deuxième服务。

“We are being sprayed with liquid mustard-gas,” I said. “See that the

windows are shut.” I then wrote a neat little situation-report to say that there

were no casualties and nothing had been contaminated; that men had been

detailed to decontaminate the outside of the coach before detraining. This

seemed to satisfy the commanding officer, for we heard no more from him.

After dark we all slept.

“我们被喷洒了液态芥子气，”我说。“看窗户关上了。”然后我写了

一份工整的小情况报告，说没有人员伤亡，也没有任何东西被污染;在

训练之前，这些人已经详细地对教练的外部进行了净化。这似乎使指

挥官感到满意，因为我们再也听不到他的消息了。天黑后，我们都睡

着了。

At last, very late, we came to our siding. It was part of our training in

security and active service conditions that we should eschew stations and

platforms. The drop from the running board to the cinder track made for

disorder and breakages in the darkness.

终于，很晚了，我们来到了我们的侧壁。这是我们在安全和现役条

件下训练的一部分，我们应该避开车站和站台。从跑板掉落到煤渣跑

道上，在黑暗中造成了混乱和破损。

“Fall in on the road below the embankment. ‘C’ Company seem to be

taking their time as usual, Captain Ryder.”

“掉在路堤下面的路上。'C公司似乎像往常一样慢慢来，莱德上

尉。

“Yes, sir. We’re having a little difficulty with the bleach.”

“是的，先生。我们在使用漂白剂时遇到了一些困难。

“Bleach?”

“漂白剂？”

“For decontaminating the outside of the coaches, sir.”

“为了净化教练的外部，先生。”

“Oh, very conscientious, I’m sure. Skip it and get a move on.”

“哦，非常认真，我敢肯定。跳过它，继续前进。

By now my half-awake and sulky men were clattering into shape on the

road. Soon Hooper’s platoon had marched off into the darkness; I found the

lorries, organized lines of men to pass the stores from hand to hand down

the steep bank, and, presently, as they found themselves doing something

with an apparent purpose in it, they got more cheerful. I handled stores with

them for the first half hour; then broke off to meet the company second-in-

command who came down with the first returning truck.

到现在为止，我半醒半醒、闷闷不乐的男人在路上咔嚓咔嚓地成

形。很快，胡珀的排就进入了黑暗中。我找到了卡车，组织了一排排

的人，沿着陡峭的河岸从一手到另一手地传递商店，现在，当他们发

现自己在做一些明显有目的的事情时，他们变得更加高兴。前半个小

时，我和他们一起处理商店;然后中断去见公司二把手，他带着第一辆

返回的卡车下来。

“It’s not a bad camp,” he reported; “big private house with two or three

lakes. Looks as if we might get some duck if we’re lucky. Village with one

pub and a post office. No town within miles. I’ve managed to get a hut

between the two of us.”

“这不是一个糟糕的营地，”他报告说;“私人住宅很大，有两三个湖

泊。看起来如果幸运的话，我们可能会得到一些鸭子。村里有一家酒

吧和一个邮局。数英里内没有城镇。我设法在我们俩之间找到了一间

小屋。

By four in the morning the work was done. I drove in the last lorry,

through tortuous lanes where the overhanging boughs whipped the

windscreen; somewhere we left the lane and turned into a drive; somewhere

we reached an open space where two drives converged and a ring of storm

lanterns marked the heap of stores. Here we unloaded the truck and, at long

last, followed the guides to our quarters, under a starless sky, with a fine

drizzle of rain beginning now to fall.

到凌晨四点，工作已经完成。我开着最后一辆卡车，穿过蜿蜒的车

道，悬垂的树枝鞭打着挡风玻璃;在某个地方，我们离开了车道，转入

了车道;在某个地方，我们到达了一个空旷的地方，两个驱动器汇合在

一起，一圈风暴灯笼标志着一堆商店。在这里，我们卸下了卡车，终

于跟着向导来到了我们的住处，在一片没有星星的天空下，现在开始

下起了细雨。

I slept until my servant called me, rose wearily, dressed and shaved in

silence. It was not till I reached the door that I asked the second-in-

command, “What’s this place called?”

我睡着了，直到我的仆人叫我，疲惫地起床，默默地穿好衣服，刮胡

子。直到我走到门口，我才问二把手：“这个地方叫什么？

He told me and, on the instant, it was as though someone had switched

off the wireless, and a voice that had been bawling in my ears, incessantly,

fatuously, for days beyond number, had been suddenly cut short; an

immense silence followed, empty at first, but gradually, as my outraged

sense regained authority, full of a multitude of sweet and natural and long

forgotten sounds: for he had spoken a name that was so familiar to me, a

conjuror’s name of such ancient power, that, at its mere sound, the

phantoms of those haunted late years began to take flight.

他告诉我，就在那一瞬间，好像有人关掉了无线，一个在我耳边咆

哮的声音，不停地，令人疲惫，数不清，突然被打断了;随之而来的是

巨大的寂静，起初是空荡荡的，但渐渐地，随着我愤怒的理智恢复了

权威，充满了许多甜美、自然和早已被遗忘的声音：因为他说出了一

个我如此熟悉的名字，一个具有如此古老力量的魔术师的名字，以至

于仅仅听到它的声音，那些闹鬼的晚年幽灵就开始飞翔。

Outside the hut I stood bemused. The rain had ceased but the clouds

hung low and heavy overhead. It was a still morning and the smoke from

the cook-house rose straight to the leaden sky. A cart-track, once metaled,

then overgrown, now rutted and churned to mud, followed the contour of

the hillside and dipped out of sight below a knoll, and on either side of it lay

the haphazard litter of corrugated iron, from which rose the rattle and

chatter and whistling and catcalls, all the zoo-noises of the battalion

beginning a new day. Beyond and about us, more familiar still, lay an

exquisite manmade landscape. It was a sequestered place, enclosed and

embraced in a single, winding valley. Our camp lay along one gentle slope;

opposite us the ground led, still unravished, to the neighborly horizon, and

between us flowed a stream—it was named the Bride and rose not two

miles away at a farm called Bridesprings, where we used sometimes to walk

to tea; it became a considerable river lower down before it joined the Avon

—which had been dammed here to form three lakes, one no more than a

wet slate among the reeds, but the others more spacious, reflecting the

clouds and the mighty beeches at their margin. The woods were all of oak

and beech, the oak gray and bare, the beech faintly dusted with green by the

breaking buds; they made a simple, carefully designed pattern with the

green glades and the wide green spaces—Did the fallow deer graze here

still?—and, lest the eye wander aimlessly, a Doric temple stood by the

water’s edge, and an ivy-grown arch spanned the lowest of the connecting

weirs. All this had been planned and planted a century and a half ago so

that, at about this date, it might be seen in its maturity. From where I stood

the house was hidden by a green spur, but I knew well how and where it lay,

couched among the lime trees like a hind in the bracken.

在小屋外面，我困惑地站着。雨停了，但乌云低沉地挂在头顶上。

那是一个寂静的早晨，炊事室的烟雾直冲铅色的天空。一条曾经是金

属的，然后杂草丛生，现在车辙和搅动成泥泞的马车轨道沿着山坡的

轮廓，在一个小山丘下看不见，在它的两边是杂乱无章的波纹铁垃

圾，从那里升起嘎嘎声、喋喋不休、口哨声和猫叫声，所有动物园的

喧嚣开始了新的一天。在我们周围，更熟悉的是，有一个精致的人造

景观。这是一个与世隔绝的地方，被一个蜿蜒曲折的山谷所包围和拥

抱。我们的营地位于一个缓坡上;我们对面的地面仍然未被破坏，通向

邻居的地平线，在我们之间流淌着一条小溪——它的名字叫新娘，在

不到两英里外的一个叫新娘泉的农场里升起，我们有时去那里喝茶;在

与埃文河汇合之前，它变成了一条相当大的河流，埃文河在这里筑坝

形成了三个湖泊，一个湖泊只不过是芦苇丛中的一块湿石板，但其他

湖泊则更宽敞，倒映着云层和边缘强大的山毛榉。树林里全是橡树和

山毛榉，橡树灰蒙蒙的，光秃秃的，山毛榉被断芽的嫩芽隐约染上了

绿色;他们用绿色的林间空地和宽阔的绿地做了一个简单而精心设计的

图案——小鹿还在这里吃草吗？——为了避免眼睛漫无目的地游荡，

一座多立克神庙矗立在水边，一个长满常春藤的拱门横跨连接堰的最

低处。所有这一切都在一个半世纪前就已经计划和种植了，因此，大

约在这个日期，可以看到它的成熟。从我站立的地方看，房子被一根

绿色的马刺遮住了，但我很清楚它是如何躺在哪里的，躺在椴树之

间，就像蕨菜中的一只后腿。

Hooper came sidling up and greeted me with his much imitated but

inimitable salute. His face was gray from his night’s vigil and he had not yet

shaved.

胡珀走了过来，用他模仿很多但无与伦比的敬礼向我打招呼。他的

脸因为守夜而变得灰白，他还没有刮胡子。

“ ‘B’ Company relieved us. I’ve sent the chaps off to get cleaned up.”

“'B'公司让我们松了一口气。我已经把这些家伙打发出去收拾了。

“Good.”

“好。”

“The house is up there, round the corner.”

“房子就在那儿，就在拐角处。”

“Yes,” I said.

“是的，”我说。

“Brigade Headquarters are coming there next week. Great barrack of a

place. I’ve just had a snoop round. Very ornate, I’d call it. And a queer

thing, there’s a sort of R.C. Church attached. I looked in and there was a

kind of service going on—just a padre and one old man. I felt very

awkward. More in your line than mine.” Perhaps I seemed not to hear; in a

final effort to excite my interest he said: “There’s a frightful great fountain,

too, in front of the steps, all rocks and sort of carved animals. You never

saw such a thing.”

“旅部下周就要到那里了。很棒的地方。我刚刚进行了一轮窥探。

非常华丽，我称之为。还有一件奇怪的事情，有一种R.C.教堂。我往

里看了看，有一种仪式在进行——只有一个牧师和一个老人。我感到

非常尴尬。你的行列比我的多。也许我似乎没有听到;为了激起我的兴

趣，他说：“台阶前面还有一个可怕的大喷泉，全是岩石和雕刻的动

物。你从来没见过这样的事情。

“Yes, Hooper, I did. I’ve been here before.”

“是的，胡珀，我做到了。我以前来过这里。

The words seemed to ring back to me enriched from the vaults of my

dungeon.

这句话似乎在我脑海中回响，从我的地牢的穹顶中丰富起来。

“Oh well, you know all about it. I’ll go and get cleaned up.”

“哦，好吧，你知道这一切。我去收拾一下。

I had been there before; I knew all about it.

我以前去过那里;我对此了如指掌。

BOOK ONE

第一册

Et in Arcadia Ego

One

I have been here before,” I said; I had been there before; first with

Sebastian more than twenty years ago on a cloudless day in June, when the

ditches were creamy with meadowsweet and the air heavy with all the

scents of summer; it was a day of peculiar splendor, and though I had been

there so often, in so many moods, it was to that first visit that my heart

returned on this, my latest.

我以前来过这里，“我说;我以前去过那里;二十多年前，在六月一个万

里无云的日子里，第一次与塞巴斯蒂安在一起，当时沟渠里弥漫着绣

线菊的奶油色，空气中弥漫着夏天的所有气味;那是一个特别辉煌的一

天，尽管我经常去那里，心情如此丰富，但正是在第一次访问时，我

的心又回到了这个，我最近的一次。

That day, too, I had come not knowing my destination. It was Eights

Week. Oxford—submerged now and obliterated, irrecoverable as

Lyonnesse, so quickly have the waters come flooding in—Oxford, in those

days, was still a city of aquatint. In her spacious and quiet streets men

walked and spoke as they had done in Newman’s day; her autumnal mists,

her gray springtime, and the rare glory of her summer days—such as that

day—when the chestnut was in flower and the bells rang out high and clear

over her gables and cupolas, exhaled the soft airs of centuries of youth. It

was this cloistral hush which gave our laughter its resonance, and carried it

still, joyously, over the intervening clamor. Here, discordantly, in Eights

Week, came a rabble of womankind, some hundreds strong, twittering and

fluttering over the cobbles and up the steps, sight-seeing and pleasure-

seeking, drinking claret cup, eating cucumber sandwiches; pushed in punts

about the river, herded in droves to the college barges; greeted in the Isis

and in the Union by a sudden display of peculiar, facetious, wholly

distressing Gilbert-and-Sullivan badinage, and by peculiar choral effects in

the college chapels. Echoes of the intruders penetrated every corner, and in

my own college was no echo, but an original fount of the grossest

disturbance. We were giving a ball. The front quad, where I lived, was

floored and tented; palms and azaleas were banked round the porter’s lodge;

worst of all, the don who lived above me, a mouse of a man connected with

the Natural Sciences, had lent his rooms for a Ladies’ Cloakroom, and a

printed notice proclaiming this outrage hung not six inches from my oak.

那天，我也不知道我的目的地。那是八周。牛津——现在被淹没

了，被湮没了，像里昂一样无法恢复，水流如此之快地涌入——牛

津，在那个年代，仍然是一个水城。在她宽敞而安静的街道上，人们

像纽曼时代一样走路和说话;她秋天的薄雾，她灰色的春天，以及她夏

日难得的光辉——比如那天——当栗子开花，钟声在她的山墙和圆顶

上高高地响起时，呼出几个世纪以来青春的柔和空气。正是这种回廊

般的寂静让我们的笑声产生了共鸣，并在中间的喧嚣中欢快地保持着

笑声。在这里，不和谐地，在八周，来了一群乌合之众，大约有几百

人，在鹅卵石上叽叽喳喳地飞来飞去，走上台阶，观光和寻欢作乐，

喝着红酒杯，吃着黄瓜三明治;在河边推着平底船，成群结队地赶到大

学驳船上;在伊希斯和联盟中，突然出现奇特的、多面的、完全令人痛

苦的吉尔伯特和沙利文的坏话，以及大学礼拜堂里奇特的合唱效果。

闯入者的回声穿透了每一个角落，在我自己的大学里，没有回声，而

是最严重骚乱的原始源泉。我们给了一个球。我住的前四边形是地板

和帐篷;棕榈树和杜鹃花围绕着门房的小屋;最糟糕的是，住在我上面

的唐，一个与自然科学有联系的人的老鼠，把他的房间借给了女士衣

帽间，一张印刷的告示宣布这种愤怒，挂在离我的橡树不到六英寸的

地方。

No one felt more strongly about it than my scout.

没有人比我的侦察员对此有更强烈的感受。

“Gentlemen who haven’t got ladies are asked as far as possible to take

their meals out in the next few days,” he announced despondently. “Will

you be lunching in?”

“没有女士的绅士们被要求在接下来的几天里尽可能地把饭菜带出

去，”他沮丧地宣布。“你会吃午饭吗？”

“No, Lunt.”

“不，伦特。”

“So as to give the servants a chance, they say. What a chance! I’ve got to

buy a pin-cushion for the Ladies’ Cloakroom. What do they want with

dancing? I don’t see the reason in it. There never was dancing before in

Eights Week. Commem. now is another matter being in the vacation, but

not in Eights Week, as if teas and the river wasn’t enough. If you ask me,

sir, it’s all on account of the war. It couldn’t have happened but for that.”

For this was 1923 and for Lunt, as for thousands of others, things could

never be the same as they had been in 1914. “Now wine in the evening,” he

continued, as was his habit half in and half out of the door, “or one or two

gentlemen to luncheon, there’s reason in. But not dancing. It all came in

with the men back from the war. They were too old and they didn’t know

and they wouldn’t learn. That’s the truth. And there’s some even goes

dancing with the town at the Masonic—but the proctors will get them, you

see…. Well, here’s Lord Sebastian. I mustn’t stand here talking when

there’s pin-cushions to get.”

“他们说，为了给仆人一个机会。多么好的机会！我得给女士衣帽

间买一个针垫。他们想要跳舞吗？我看不出其中的原因。八人周以前

从未跳过舞。委员会。现在是另一回事，在假期里，但不是在八周，

好像茶和河流还不够。如果你问我，先生，这都是因为战争。如果不

是这样，它不可能发生。因为这是1923年，对伦特来说，就像对成千

上万的人一样，事情永远不会像1914年那样。“现在晚上喝酒，”他继

续说，按照他的习惯，一半进门，一半出门，“或者一两个绅士去吃午

饭，这是有理由的。但不是跳舞。这一切都是随着从战争中回来的人

而来的。他们太老了，他们不知道，他们不会学习。这是事实。有些

人甚至会和镇上的人一起跳舞——但监考人员会得到他们，你看......好

吧，这是塞巴斯蒂安勋爵。我不能站在这里说话，因为有针垫可以

拿。

Sebastian entered—dove-gray flannel, white crêpe de Chine, a Charvet

tie, my tie as it happened, a pattern of postage stamps—“Charles—what in

the world’s happening at your college? Is there a circus? I’ve seen

everything except elephants. I must say the whole of Oxford has become

most peculiar suddenly. Last night it was pullulating with women. You’re to

come away at once, out of danger. I’ve got a motor-car and a basket of

strawberries and a bottle of Château Peyraguey—which isn’t a wine you’ve

ever tasted, so don’t pretend. It’s heaven with strawberries.”

塞巴斯蒂安走了进来——鸽灰色法兰绒，白色绉纱，一条夏尔维特

领带，我的领带，一张邮票图案——“查尔斯——你的大学里到底发生

了什么？有马戏团吗？除了大象，我什么都见过。我必须说，整个牛

津突然变得最奇特了。昨晚它和女人一起拉扯。你要马上离开，脱离

危险。我有一辆汽车，一篮草莓和一瓶佩拉盖酒庄——这不是你尝过

的酒，所以不要假装。这里是草莓的天堂。

“Where are we going?”

“我们要去哪里？”

“To see a friend.”

“去见朋友。”

“Who?”

“谁？”

“Name of Hawkins. Bring some money in case we see anything we want

to buy. The motor-car is the property of a man called Hardcastle. Return the

bits to him if I kill myself; I’m not very good at driving.”

“霍金斯的名字。带上一些钱，以防我们看到任何我们想买的东

西。这辆汽车是一个叫哈德卡斯尔的人的财产。如果我自杀了，就把

碎片还给他;我不太擅长开车。

Beyond the gate, beyond the winter garden that was once the lodge,

stood an open, two-seater Morris-Cowley. Sebastian’s teddy bear sat at the

wheel. We put him between us—“Take care he’s not sick”—and drove off.

The bells of St. Mary’s were chiming nine; we escaped collision with a

clergyman, black-straw-hatted, white-bearded, pedaling quietly down the

wrong side of the High Street, crossed Carfax, passed the station, and were

soon in open country on the Botley Road; open country was easily reached

in those days.

在大门之外，在曾经是小屋的冬季花园之外，矗立着一辆开放式的

双座莫里斯-考利。塞巴斯蒂安的泰迪熊坐在方向盘上。我们把他放在

我们中间——“小心他没有生病”——然后开车走了。圣玛丽教堂的钟

声响了九声;我们躲过了与一位神职人员的碰撞，他戴着黑草帽，留着

白胡子，悄悄地踩着高街的另一边，穿过卡法克斯，经过车站，很快

就到了博特利路的开阔地带;在那些日子里，开阔的乡村很容易到达。

“Isn’t it early?” said Sebastian. “The women are still doing whatever

women do to themselves before they come downstairs. Sloth has undone

them. We’re away. God bless Hardcastle.”

“现在还早吗？”塞巴斯蒂安说。“女人们在下楼之前仍然在做女人

对自己所做的任何事情。树懒已经撤消了他们。我们走了。上帝保佑

哈德卡斯尔。

“Whoever he may be.”

“不管他是谁。”

“He thought he was coming with us. Sloth undid him too. Well, I did tell

him ten. He’s a very gloomy man in my college. He leads a double life. At

least I assume he does. He couldn’t go on being Hardcastle, day and night,

always, could he?—or he’d die of it. He says he knows my father, which is

impossible.”

“他以为他会和我们一起来。树懒也把他弄坏了。好吧，我确实告

诉了他十个。在我的大学里，他是一个非常阴郁的人。他过着双重生

活。至少我认为他是这样做的。他不能一直做哈德卡斯尔，日夜，总

是，不是吗？——否则他会死的。他说他认识我父亲，这是不可能

的。

“Why?”

“为什么？”

“No one knows papa. He’s a social leper. Hadn’t you heard?”

“没人认识爸爸。他是一个社交麻风病人。你没听说过吗？

“It’s a pity neither of us can sing,” I said.

“可惜我们俩都不会唱歌，”我说。

At Swindon we turned off the main road and, as the sun mounted high,

we were among dry-stone walls and ashlar houses. It was about eleven

when Sebastian, without warning, turned the car into a cart track and

stopped. It was hot enough now to make us seek the shade. On a sheep-

cropped knoll under a clump of elms we ate the strawberries and drank the

wine—as Sebastian promised, they were delicious together—and we lit fat,

Turkish cigarettes and lay on our backs, Sebastian’s eyes on the leaves

above him, mine on his profile, while the blue-gray smoke rose, untroubled

by any wind, to the blue-green shadows of foliage, and the sweet scent of

the tobacco merged with the sweet summer scents around us and the fumes

of the sweet, golden wine seemed to lift us a finger’s breadth above the turf

and hold us suspended.

在斯温顿，我们关闭了主干道，当太阳升起时，我们置身于干石墙

和方石房屋之间。大约十一点，塞巴斯蒂安毫无征兆地将汽车变成了

一条车道并停了下来。现在天气很热，让我们寻找阴凉处。在一丛榆

树下的羊秆小丘上，我们吃着草莓，喝着酒——正如塞巴斯蒂安所承

诺的那样，它们在一起很好吃——我们点燃了肥厚的土耳其香烟，仰

面躺着，塞巴斯蒂安的眼睛盯着他头顶的树叶，我的眼睛盯着他的轮

廓，而蓝灰色的烟雾升起，不受任何风的干扰，上升到蓝绿色的树叶

阴影中，烟草的甜味与我们周围甜美的夏日香味融为一体，甜美的金

色葡萄酒的烟雾似乎将我们抬高到草皮上方一指宽，将我们悬浮起

来。

“Just the place to bury a crock of gold,” said Sebastian. “I should like to

bury something precious in every place where I’ve been happy and then,

when I was old and ugly and miserable, I could come back and dig it up and

remember.”

“只是埋一罐金子的地方，”塞巴斯蒂安说。“我想在每一个我快乐

的地方埋葬一些珍贵的东西，然后，当我老了，丑陋和悲惨的时候，

我可以回来把它挖出来并记住。

This was my third term since matriculation, but I date my Oxford life from

my first meeting with Sebastian, which had happened, by chance, in the

middle of the term before. We were in different colleges and came from

different schools; I might well have spent my three or four years in the

University and never have met him, but for the chance of his getting drunk

one evening in my college and of my having ground-floor rooms in the

front quadrangle.

这是我入学以来的第三个学期，但我从第一次见到塞巴斯蒂安开始就

开始了我的牛津生活，那是在前一个学期的中期偶然发生的。我们在

不同的大学，来自不同的学校;我很可能在大学里呆了三四年，却从未

见过他，要不是有一天晚上他在我的大学里喝醉了，而且我在前面四

合院的一楼房间里。

I had been warned against the dangers of these rooms by my cousin

Jasper, who alone, when I first came up, thought me a suitable subject for

detailed guidance. My father offered me none. Then, as always, he

eschewed serious conversation with me. It was not until I was within a

fortnight of going up that he mentioned the subject at all; then he said, shyly

and rather slyly: “I’ve been talking about you. I met your future Warden at

the Athenaeum. I wanted to talk about Etruscan notions of immortality; he

wanted to talk about extension lectures for the working-class; so we

compromised and talked about you. I asked him what your allowance

should be. He said, ‘Three hundred a year; on no account give him more;

that’s all most men have.’ I thought that a deplorable answer. I had more

than most men when I was up, and my recollection is that nowhere else in

the world and at no other time, do a few hundred pounds, one way or the

other, make so much difference to one’s importance and popularity. I toyed

with the idea of giving you six hundred,” said my father, snuffling a little,

as he did when he was amused, “but I reflected that, should the Warden

come to hear of it, it might sound deliberately impolite. So I shall give you

five hundred and fifty.”

我的表弟贾斯珀（Jasper）警告过我注意这些房间的危险，当我第

一次来到这里时，只有他一个人认为我是一个适合详细指导的对象。

我父亲没有给我任何东西。然后，一如既往，他避免与我严肃的谈

话。直到我上去不到两周，他才提到这个话题;然后他害羞而狡猾地

说：“我一直在谈论你。我在雅典娜神庙遇见了你未来的典狱长。我想

谈谈伊特鲁里亚人的不朽观念;他想谈谈为工人阶级提供的扩展讲座;

所以我们妥协了，谈论了你。我问他你的津贴应该是多少。他说：'一

年三百;不要给他更多;这就是大多数男人所拥有的。我认为这是一个

可悲的答案。当我长大的时候，我比大多数男人都多，我的记忆是，

世界上没有其他地方，也没有其他时间，以这种或那种方式做几百

磅，对一个人的重要性和受欢迎程度产生如此大的影响。我曾想过要

给你六百块钱，“我父亲说，抽了抽鼻子，就像他被逗乐时所做的那

样，”但我想，如果典狱长听说了，这听起来可能是故意不礼貌的。所

以我给你五百五十。

I thanked him.

我感谢他。

“Yes, it’s indulgent of me, but it all comes out of capital, you know…. I

suppose this is the time I should give you advice. I never had any myself

except once from your cousin Alfred. Do you know, in the summer before I

was going up, your cousin Alfred rode over to Boughton especially to give

me a piece of advice? And do you know what that advice was? ‘Ned,’ he

said, ‘there’s one thing I must beg of you. Always wear a tall hat on

Sundays during term. It is by that, more than anything, that a man is

judged.’ And do you know,” continued my father, snuffling deeply, “I

always did. Some men did, some didn’t. I never saw any difference between

them or heard it commented on, but I always wore mine. It only shows what

effect judicious advice can have, properly delivered at the right moment. I

wish I had some for you, but I haven’t.”

“是的，这是我的放纵，但这一切都来自资本，你知道的......我想现

在是我应该给你建议的时候了。我自己从来没有过，除了你表弟阿尔

弗雷德的一次。你知道吗，在我上山之前的那个夏天，你的表弟阿尔

弗雷德特意骑马到布顿来给我一个建议？你知道那个建议是什么吗？

“奈德，”他说，“有一件事我必须求求你。在学期期间的星期天总是戴

一顶高帽子。一个人的审判比什么都重要。你知道吗，“我父亲继续

说，深深地吸了一口气，”我总是这样做。有些人做到了，有些人没

有。我从未看到它们之间有任何区别，也从未听到过它的评论，但我

总是穿着我的。它只显示了明智的建议在正确的时间正确提供可以产

生什么效果。我希望我能给你一些，但我没有。

My cousin Jasper made good the loss; he was the son of my father’s

elder brother, to whom he referred more than once, only half facetiously, as

“the Head of the Family”; he was in his fourth year and, the term before,

had come within appreciable distance of getting his rowing blue; he was

secretary of the Canning and president of the J.C.R.; a considerable person

in college. He called on me formally during my first week and stayed to tea;

he ate a very heavy meal of honey-buns, anchovy toast, and Fuller’s walnut

cake, then he lit his pipe and, lying back in the basket-chair, laid down the

rules of conduct which I should follow; he covered most subjects; even

today I could repeat much of what he said, word for word. “… You’re

reading History? A perfectly respectable school. The very worst is English

literature and the next worst is Modern Greats. You want either a first or a

fourth. There is no value in anything between. Time spent on a good second

is time thrown away. You should go to the best lectures—Arkwright on

Demosthenes for instance—irrespective of whether they are in your school

or not…. Clothes. Dress as you do in a country house. Never wear a tweed

coat and flannel trousers—always a suit. And go to a London tailor; you get

better cut and longer credit…. Clubs. Join the Carlton now and the Grid at

the beginning of your second year. If you want to run for the Union—and

it’s not a bad thing to do—make your reputation outside first, at the

Canning or the Chatham, and begin by speaking on the paper…. Keep clear

of Boar’s Hill….” The sky over the opposing gables glowed and then

darkened; I put more coal on the fire and turned on the light, revealing in

their respectability his London-made plus-fours and his Leander tie….

“Don’t treat dons like schoolmasters; treat them as you would the vicar at

home…. You’ll find you spend half your second year shaking off the

undesirable friends you made in your first…. Beware of the Anglo-

Catholics—they’re all sodomites with unpleasant accents. In fact, steer

clear of all the religious groups; they do nothing but harm….”

我的表弟贾斯珀弥补了损失;他是我父亲哥哥的儿子，他不止一次

地称他为“一家之主”，只是半张脸;他当时已经是第四年了，在前一个

学期，他已经离获得赛艇蓝色的距离很近了。他曾担任坎宁的秘书和

JCR的主席;在大学里是一个相当大的人。在我第一周，他正式拜访了

我，并留下来喝茶;他吃了一顿很重的蜂蜜面包、凤尾鱼吐司和富勒的

核桃蛋糕，然后他点燃了烟斗，躺在篮子椅上，制定了我应该遵守的

行为准则;他涵盖了大多数主题;即使在今天，我也可以逐字逐句地重

复他说的大部分话。"...你在读历史吗？一所非常受人尊敬的学校。最

糟糕的是英国文学，其次是现代伟人。你想要第一个或第四个。两者

之间没有任何价值。花在一秒钟上的时间是浪费的时间。你应该去听

最好的讲座——例如阿克赖特关于德摩斯梯尼的讲座——不管他们是

否在你的学校里。衣服。穿得像在乡间别墅里一样。永远不要穿粗花

呢大衣和法兰绒裤子——总是西装。然后去找伦敦的裁缝;你会得到更

好的削减和更长的信用......梅花。立即加入 Carlton，并在第二年开始

时加入 Grid。如果你想竞选联盟——这不是一件坏事——首先在外

面，在坎宁或查塔姆，然后从在报纸上发言开始。远离野猪山......”对

面山墙上的天空发光，然后变暗;我在火上放了更多的煤，打开了灯，

在他们体面的面前露出了他伦敦制造的加四分裤和他的利安德领带......

“不要像对待校长一样对待唐斯;像对待家里的牧师一样对待他们......你

会发现你花了第二年的一半时间摆脱你在第一年结交的不受欢迎的朋

友......当心盎格鲁天主教徒——他们都是口音令人不快的鸡奸者。事实

上，避开所有的宗教团体;他们除了伤害之外什么都不做......”

Finally, just as he was going, he said, “One last point. Change your

rooms.”—They were large, with deeply recessed windows and painted,

eighteenth-century paneling; I was lucky as a freshman to get them. “I’ve

seen many a man ruined through having ground-floor rooms in the front

quad,” said my cousin with deep gravity. “People start dropping in. They

leave their gowns here and come and collect them before hall; you start

giving them sherry. Before you know where you are, you’ve opened a free

bar for all the undesirables of the college.”

最后，就在他要走的时候，他说：“最后一点。换你的房间。——

它们很大，有深凹的窗户和十八世纪的彩绘镶板;作为大一新生，我很

幸运能得到它们。“我见过很多人因为前四边形的一楼房间而毁了，”

我的表弟深深地说。“人们开始进来。他们把长袍留在这里，到大厅前

来取;你开始给他们雪利酒。在你知道自己身在何处之前，你已经为学

院里所有不受欢迎的人开了一家免费酒吧。

I do not know that I ever, consciously, followed any of this advice. I

certainly never changed my rooms; there were gillyflowers growing below

the windows which on summer evenings filled them with fragrance.

我不知道我曾经有意识地遵循过任何这些建议。我当然从来没有换

过我的房间;窗户下面长着吉利花，在夏天的夜晚，它们充满了芬芳。

It is easy, retrospectively, to endow one’s youth with a false precocity or

a false innocence; to tamper with the dates marking one’s stature on the

edge of the door. I should like to think—indeed I sometimes do think—that

I decorated those rooms with Morris stuffs and Arundel prints and that my

shelves were filled with seventeenth-century folios and French novels of the

second empire in Russia-leather and watered silk. But this was not the truth.

On my first afternoon I proudly hung a reproduction of Van Gogh’s

Sunflowers over the fire and set up a screen, painted by Roger Fry with a

Provençal landscape, which I had bought inexpensively when the Omega

workshops were sold up. I displayed also a poster by McKnight Kauffer and

Rhyme Sheets from the Poetry Bookshop, and, most painful to recall, a

porcelain figure of Polly Peachum which stood between black tapers on the

chimney-piece. My books were meager and commonplace—Roger Fry’s

Vision and Design, the Medici Press edition of A Shropshire Lad, Eminent

Victorians, some volumes of Georgian Poetry, Sinister Street, and South

Wind—and my earliest friends fitted well into this background; they were

Collins, a Wykehamist, an embryo don, a man of solid reading and childlike

humor, and a small circle of college intellectuals, who maintained a middle

course of culture between the flamboyant “aesthetes” and the proletarian

scholars who scrambled fiercely for facts in the lodging houses of the Iffley

Road and Wellington Square. It was by this circle that I found myself

adopted during my first term; they provided the kind of company I had

enjoyed in the sixth form at school, for which the sixth form had prepared

me; but even in the earliest days, when the whole business of living at

Oxford, with rooms of my own and my own check book, was a source of

excitement, I felt at heart that this was not all which Oxford had to offer.

回想起来，很容易给一个人的青春带来虚假的早熟或虚假的纯真;

篡改在门边标记自己身材的日期。我想——事实上，我有时确实会想

——我用莫里斯的东西和阿伦德尔的版画装饰了那些房间，我的书架

上摆满了十七世纪的对开页和第二帝国的法国小说——用俄罗斯皮革

和浇水的丝绸。但事实并非如此。第一天下午，我自豪地将梵高的

《向日葵》的复制品挂在火上，并设置了一个由罗杰·弗莱（Roger

Fry）绘制的普罗旺斯风景屏风，这是我在欧米茄工作室售罄时以低廉

的价格购买的。我还展示了麦克奈特·考弗（McKnight Kauffer）的海

报和诗歌书店的押韵表（Rhyme Sheets），最令人痛苦的是，波莉·皮

奇姆（Polly Peachum）的瓷像站在烟囱上的黑色锥形之间。我的书简

陋而平凡——罗杰·弗莱（Roger Fry）的《愿景与设计》（Vision and

Design）、美第奇出版社（Medici Press）版的《什罗普郡小伙子》

（A Shropshire Lad）、《杰出的维多利亚时代》（Eminent

Victorians）、几卷《乔治亚诗歌》（Georgian Poetry）、《险恶的街

道》（Sinister Street）和《南风》（South Wind）——而我最早的朋友

也非常适合这种背景;他们是柯林斯，一个威克汉姆主义者，一个胚胎

唐，一个扎实的阅读和孩子般的幽默的人，以及一小群大学知识分

子，他们在华丽的“美学家”和无产阶级学者之间保持着一种中间文化

路线，他们在伊夫利路和惠灵顿广场的旅馆里激烈地争夺事实。正是

通过这个圈子，我发现自己在第一个任期内被收养了;他们提供了我在

学校六年级时所享受的那种陪伴，六年级为我做好了准备;但即使在最

初的日子里，当住在牛津的整个业务，拥有自己的房间和我自己的支

票簿时，我内心深处都觉得这并不是牛津所能提供的全部。

At Sebastian’s approach these gray figures seemed quietly to fade into

the landscape and vanish, like highland sheep in the misty heather. Collins

had exposed the fallacy of modern aesthetics to me: “… the whole

argument from Significant Form stands or falls by volume. If you allow

Cézanne to represent a third dimension on his two-dimensional canvas, then

you must allow Landseer his gleam of loyalty in the spaniel’s eye”… but it

was not until Sebastian, idly turning the page of Clive Bell’s Art, read: “

‘Does anyone feel the same kind of emotion for a butterfly or a flower that

he feels for a cathedral or a picture?’ Yes. I do,” that my eyes were opened.

在塞巴斯蒂安的逼近下，这些灰色的身影似乎悄悄地消失在风景

中，消失了，就像雾气弥漫的石楠花中的高地绵羊。柯林斯向我揭露

了现代美学的谬误：“......《重要形式》的整个论点按体积站立或下

降。如果你允许塞尚在他的二维画布上表现第三维度，那么你必须让

兰瑟在猎犬眼中闪耀出忠诚的光芒“......但直到塞巴斯蒂安

（Sebastian）无所事事地翻开克莱夫·贝尔（Clive Bell）的《艺术》一

页，读到：“'有没有人对蝴蝶或花朵有同样的情感，就像他对大教堂

或一幅画的感觉一样？是的。我愿意，“我的眼睛睁开了。

I knew Sebastian by sight long before I met him. That was unavoidable

for, from his first week, he was the most conspicuous man of his year by

reason of his beauty, which was arresting, and his eccentricities of behavior,

which seemed to know no bounds. My first sight of him was in the door of

Germer’s, and, on that occasion, I was struck less by his looks than by the

fact that he was carrying a large teddy-bear.

早在我遇见塞巴斯蒂安之前，我就认识了他。这是不可避免的，因

为从他的第一个星期开始，他就是他这一年中最引人注目的人，因为

他的美貌引人注目，而且他的古怪行为似乎无止境。我第一次见到他

是在Germer's的门口，那次，我印象不深的是他的外表，而是他抱着

一只大泰迪熊。

“That,” said the barber, as I took his chair, “was Lord Sebastian Flyte. A

most amusing young gentleman.”

“那个，”理发师说，我坐在他的椅子上，“是塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特勋

爵。一个最有趣的年轻绅士。

“Apparently,” I said coldly.

“显然，”我冷冷地说。

“The Marquis of Marchmain’s second boy. His brother, the Earl of

Brideshead, went down last term. Now he was very different, a very quiet

gentleman, quite like an old man. What do you suppose Lord Sebastian

wanted? A hair brush for his teddy-bear; it had to have very stiff bristles,

not, Lord Sebastian said, to brush him with, but to threaten him with a

spanking when he was sulky. He bought a very nice one with an ivory back

and he’s having ‘Aloysius’ engraved on it—that’s the bear’s name.” The

man, who, in his time, had had ample chance to tire of undergraduate

fantasy, was plainly captivated. I, however, remained censorious, and

subsequent glimpses of him, driving in a hansom cab and dining at the

George in false whiskers, did not soften me, although Collins, who was

reading Freud, had a number of technical terms to cover everything.

“马奇曼侯爵的第二个儿子。他的兄弟布里德斯黑德伯爵（Earl of

Brideshead）上个学期倒下了。现在他变得非常不同，一个非常安静的

绅士，很像一个老人。你认为塞巴斯蒂安勋爵想要什么？为他的泰迪

熊梳子;塞巴斯蒂安勋爵说，它必须有非常坚硬的刷毛，不是为了刷

他，而是在他生闷气时用打屁股来威胁他。他买了一只非常漂亮的象

牙背，上面刻着'Aloysius'——这就是这只熊的名字。这个男人，在他

那个时代，有充分的机会厌倦了本科生的幻想，显然被迷住了。然

而，我仍然受到审查，随后瞥见他开着一辆汉森出租车，戴着假胡须

在乔治家吃饭，并没有软化我，尽管正在阅读弗洛伊德的柯林斯有许

多技术术语来涵盖一切。

Nor, when at last we met, were the circumstances propitious. It was

shortly before midnight in early March; I had been entertaining the college

intellectuals to mulled claret; the fire was roaring, the air of my room heavy

with smoke and spice, and my mind weary with metaphysics. I threw open

my windows and from the quad outside came the not uncommon sounds of

bibulous laughter and unsteady steps. A voice said: “Hold up”; another,

“Come on”; another, “Plenty of time… House… till Tom stops ringing”;

and another, clearer than the rest, “D’ you know I feel most unaccountably

unwell. I must leave you a minute,” and there appeared at my window the

face I knew to be Sebastian’s, but not, as I had formerly seen it, alive and

alight with gaiety; he looked at me for a moment with unfocused eyes and

then, leaning forward well into the room, he was sick.

当我们终于见面时，情况也不容乐观。那是三月初午夜前不久;我

一直在招待大学知识分子，让他们喝红葡萄酒;火在咆哮，我房间的空

气中弥漫着浓浓的烟雾和香料，我的头脑因形而上学而疲惫不堪。我

推开窗户，从外面的四边形里传来了不少见的笑声和不稳的脚步声。

一个声音说：“等一下”;另一个，“来吧”;“另一个，”时间充裕......房

子。。。直到汤姆停止响铃“;“另一个，比其他人更清楚，”D'你知道我

感到最不舒服。我必须给你一分钟，“我的窗户上出现了一张我知道是

塞巴斯蒂安的脸，但不像我以前看到的那样，活生生的，欢快地发光;

他用没有焦点的眼睛看了我一会儿，然后，身体前倾进入房间，他生

病了。

It was not unusual for dinner parties to end in that way; there was in fact

a recognized tariff for the scout on such occasions; we were all learning, by

trial and error, to carry our wine. There was also a kind of insane and

endearing orderliness about Sebastian’s choice, in his extremity, of an open

window. But, when all is said, it remained an unpropitious meeting.

晚宴以这种方式结束并不罕见;事实上，在这种情况下，侦察兵有

一个公认的关税;我们都在通过反复试验来学习携带我们的葡萄酒。塞

巴斯蒂安选择一扇敞开的窗户也有一种疯狂而可爱的秩序。但是，总

而言之，这仍然是一次不恰当的会议。

His friends bore him to the gate and, in a few minutes, his host, an

amiable Etonian of my year, returned to apologize. He, too, was tipsy and

his explanations were repetitive and, towards the end, tearful. “The wines

were too various,” he said: “it was neither the quality nor the quantity that

was at fault. It was the mixture. Grasp that and you have the root of the

matter. To understand all is to forgive all.”

他的朋友们把他抬到门口，几分钟后，他的主人，一个和我同年级

的和蔼可亲的伊顿人，回来道歉。他也喝得酩酊大醉，他的解释是重

复的，到最后，他泪流满面。“葡萄酒种类繁多，”他说，“问题既不在

于质量，也不在于数量。这是混合物。掌握了这一点，你就有了问题

的根源。理解一切就是宽恕一切。

“Yes,” I said, but it was with a sense of grievance that I faced Lunt’s

reproaches next morning.

“是的，”我说，但第二天早上我带着委屈的心情面对伦特的责备。

“A couple of jugs of mulled claret between the five of you,” Lunt said, “and

this had to happen. Couldn’t even get to the window. Those that can’t keep

it down are better without it.”

“你们五个人之间有几壶热红葡萄酒，”伦特说，“这必须发生。甚至不

能到窗户。那些不能压制它的人没有它会更好。

“It wasn’t one of my party. It was someone from out of college.”

“这不是我的聚会之一。那是大学毕业的人。

“Well, it’s just as nasty clearing it up, whoever it was.”

“嗯，不管是谁，清理它也一样讨厌。”

“There’s five shillings on the sideboard.”

“餐具柜上有五先令。”

“So I saw and thank you, but I’d rather not have the money and not have

the mess, any morning.”

“所以我看到了，谢谢你，但我宁愿没有钱，也不想有烂摊子，任

何一个早上。

I took my gown and left him to his task. I still frequented the lecture-

room in those days, and it was after eleven when I returned to college. I

found my room full of flowers; what looked like, and, in fact, was, the

entire day’s stock of a market-stall stood in every conceivable vessel in

every part of the room. Lunt was secreting the last of them in brown paper

preparatory to taking them home.

我拿起我的长袍，让他去做他的任务。那时候我还经常光顾教室，

回到大学的时候已经十一点多了。我发现我的房间里摆满了鲜花;看起

来，事实上，一个市场摊位一整天的库存都放在房间每个地方的每一

个可以想象到的容器里。伦特正在用牛皮纸分泌他们中的最后一个，

准备把他们带回家。

“Lunt, what is all this?”

“伦特，这到底是怎么回事？”

“The gentleman from last night, sir, he left a note for you.”

“昨晚的那位先生，先生，他给你留了一张纸条。”

The note was written in conté crayon on a whole sheet of my choice

Whatman H.P. drawing paper: I am very contrite. Aloysius won’t speak to

me until he sees I am forgiven, so please come to luncheon today. Sebastian

Flyte. It was typical of him, I reflected, to assume I knew where he lived;

but, then, I did know.

这张纸条是用蜡笔写的，在我选择的Whatman H.P.绘图纸上写了一

整张纸：我非常懊悔。阿洛伊修斯在看到我被宽恕之前不会和我说

话，所以请今天来吃午饭。塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特。我想，这是他的典型

特征，假设我知道他住在哪里;但是，后来，我确实知道了。

“A most amusing gentleman, I’m sure it’s quite a pleasure to clean up

after him. I take it you’re lunching out, sir. I told Mr. Collins and Mr.

Partridge so—they wanted to have their commons in here with you.”

“一个最有趣的绅士，我敢肯定，在他身后打扫卫生是一件很愉快

的事情。我以为你在外面吃午饭，先生。我告诉柯林斯先生和帕特里

奇先生，他们想和你一起在这里。

“Yes, Lunt, lunching out.”

“是的，伦特，出去吃午饭。”

That luncheon party—for party it proved to be—was the beginning of a

new epoch in my life.

那次午餐会——事实证明是派对——是我生命中一个新时代的开

始。

I went there uncertainly, for it was foreign ground and there was a tiny,

priggish, warning voice in my ear which in the tones of Collins told me it

was seemly to hold back. But I was in search of love in those days, and I

went full of curiosity and the faint, unrecognized apprehension that here, at

last, I should find that low door in the wall, which others, I knew, had found

before me, which opened on an enclosed and enchanted garden, which was

somewhere, not overlooked by any window, in the heart of that gray city.

我不确定地去了那里，因为那是一片陌生的土地，我耳边有一个微

小的、尖锐的、警告的声音，柯林斯的语气告诉我，这似乎是要退

缩。但是在那些日子里，我一直在寻找爱情，我充满了好奇心和一种

微弱的、无法辨认的忧虑，我终于应该在这里找到墙上的那扇低矮的

门，我知道其他人在我之前已经找到了它，它通向一个封闭而迷人的

花园，它位于某个地方，没有任何窗户可以忽略它，在那座灰色城市

的中心。

Sebastian lived at Christ Church, high in Meadow Buildings. He was

alone when I came, peeling a plover’s egg taken from the large nest of moss

in the center of his table.

塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）住在基督教堂（Christ Church），位于草

地建筑（Meadow Buildings）的高处。我来的时候，他独自一人，剥

着从桌子中央的大苔藓窝里取出的鸻鸟蛋。

“I’ve just counted them,” he said. “There were five each and two over,

so I’m having the two. I’m unaccountably hungry today. I put myself

unreservedly in the hands of Dolbear and Goodall, and feel so drugged that

I’ve begun to believe that the whole of yesterday evening was a dream.

Please don’t wake me up.”

“我刚刚数了数，”他说。“每个都有五个，两个以上，所以我有两

个。我今天莫名其妙地饿了。我毫无保留地把自己交到多尔贝尔和古

道尔的手中，感觉自己被迷住了，以至于我开始相信昨天晚上的整个

过程都是一场梦。请不要吵醒我。

He was entrancing, with that epicene beauty which in extreme youth

sings aloud for love and withers at the first cold wind.

他令人着迷，有一种史诗般的美，在极端的青春中为爱大声歌唱，

在第一阵寒风中枯萎。

His room was filled with a strange jumble of objects—a harmonium in a

gothic case, an elephant’s-foot waste-paper basket, a dome of wax fruit, two

disproportionately large Sèvres vases, framed drawings by Daumier—made

all the more incongruous by the austere college furniture and the large

luncheon table. His chimneypiece was covered in cards of invitation from

London hostesses.

他的房间里堆满了一堆奇怪的杂物——一个装在哥特式盒子里的风

琴，一个象脚的废纸篓，一个蜡制水果的圆顶，两个不成比例的大塞

夫尔花瓶，多米耶的装裱画——简朴的学院家具和大午餐桌使这些物

品更加不协调。他的烟囱上挂满了伦敦女招待的邀请卡。

“That beast Hobson has put Aloysius next door,” he said. “Perhaps it’s

as well, as there wouldn’t have been any plovers’ eggs for him. D’you

know, Hobson hates Aloysius. I wish I had a scout like yours. He was sweet

to me this morning where some people might have been quite strict.”

“霍布森把阿洛伊修斯放在隔壁的那只野兽，”他说。“也许也是这

样，因为不会有任何鸻鸟的蛋给他。你知道，霍布森讨厌阿洛伊修

斯。我希望我有一个像你这样的侦察员。今天早上他对我很贴心，有

些人可能很严格。

The party assembled. There were three Etonian freshmen, mild, elegant,

detached young men who had all been to a dance in London the night

before, and spoke of it as though it had been the funeral of a near but

unloved kinsman. Each as he came into the room made first for the plovers’

eggs, then noticed Sebastian and then myself with a polite lack of curiosity

which seemed to say: “We should not dream of being so offensive as to

suggest that you never met us before.”

聚会集会。有三个伊顿大学的新生，温和、优雅、超然的年轻人，

他们都参加了前一天晚上在伦敦举行的舞会，他们说起那好像是一个

亲近但不被爱的亲戚的葬礼。当他走进房间时，他先是为鸻鸟的蛋

做，然后注意到塞巴斯蒂安，然后是我，礼貌地缺乏好奇心，似乎在

说：“我们不应该梦想如此冒犯，以至于暗示你以前从未见过我们。

“The first this year,” they said. “Where do you get them?”

“今年第一次，”他们说。“你从哪里弄来的？”

“Mummy sends them from Brideshead. They always lay early for her.”

“妈妈从布里德斯黑德送来了它们。他们总是早早地为她躺下。

When the eggs were gone and we were eating the lobster Newburg, the

last guest arrived.

当鸡蛋吃完了，我们正在吃纽堡龙虾时，最后一位客人来了。

“My dear,” he said, “I couldn’t get away before. I was lunching with my

p-p-preposterous tutor. He thought it very odd my leaving when I did. I told

him I had to change for F-f-footer.”

“亲爱的，”他说，“我以前逃不掉。我正在和我的p-p-荒谬的导师共

进午餐。当我离开时，他觉得很奇怪。我告诉他我必须换成F-f-

footer。

He was tall, slim, rather swarthy, with large saucy eyes. The rest of us

wore rough tweeds and brogues. He had on a smooth chocolate-brown suit

with loud white stripes, suede shoes, a large bow-tie and he drew off

yellow, wash-leather gloves as he came into the room; part Gallic, part

Yankee, part, perhaps, Jew; wholly exotic.

他身材高大，身材苗条，黝黑，有一双炯炯有神的大眼睛。我们其

他人都穿着粗花呢和布洛克鞋。他穿着一件光滑的巧克力棕色西装，

上面有醒目的白色条纹，麂皮鞋，打着大领结，走进房间时，他摘下

了黄色的水洗皮手套;一部分是高卢人，一部分是洋基，一部分，也许

是犹太人;完全异国情调。

This, I did not need telling, was Anthony Blanche, the “aesthete” par

excellence, a byword of iniquity from Cherwell Edge to Somerville. He had

been pointed out to me often in the streets, as he pranced along with his

high peacock tread; I had heard his voice in the George challenging the

conventions; and now meeting him, under the spell of Sebastian, I found

myself enjoying him voraciously.

我不需要说，这就是安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche），卓越的

“美学家”，从切尔韦尔·埃奇（Cherwell Edge）到萨默维尔

（Somerville）的罪孽代名词。他经常在街上被指给我，因为他踩着高

高的孔雀步蹒跚而行;我在乔治号上听到了他的声音，挑战了传统;现

在见到他，在塞巴斯蒂安的咒语下，我发现自己贪婪地享受着他。

After luncheon he stood on the balcony with a megaphone which had

appeared surprisingly among the bric-à-brac of Sebastian’s room, and in

languishing tones recited passages from The Waste Land to the sweatered

and muffled throng that was on its way to the river.

午饭后，他站在阳台上，拿着一个扩音器，这个扩音器出人意料地

出现在塞巴斯蒂安房间的杂物中，用萎靡不振的语调背诵着《荒原》

中的段落，对着正在前往河边的衣衫褴褛、闷闷不乐的人群。

“I, Tiresias, have foresuffered all,” he sobbed to them from the Venetian

arches;

“我，提瑞西亚斯，已经预受了一切，”他在威尼斯拱门上对他们啜

泣;

“Enacted on this same d-divan or b-bed,

“

在同一个

d-divan

或

b-bed

上颁布，

I who have sat by Thebes below the wall

我坐在底比斯城墙下

And walked among the l-l-lowest of the dead….”

走在最底层的死者中间......”

And then, stepping lightly into the room, “How I have surprised them!

All b-boatmen are Grace Darlings to me.”

然后，轻轻地走进房间，“我多么让他们感到惊讶！所有 b 船夫对

我来说都是 Grace Darlings。

We sat on sipping Cointreau while the mildest and most detached of the

Etonians sang: “Home they brought her warrior dead’ to his own

accompaniment on the harmonium.

我们坐在君度上啜饮着，而伊顿人中最温和、最超然的人唱着：

“他们把她的战士带回家了”，在他自己的口琴伴奏下。

It was four o’clock before we broke up.

我们分手前是四点钟。

Anthony Blanche was the first to go. He took formal and complimentary

leave of each of us in turn. To Sebastian he said: “My dear, I should like to

stick you full of barbed arrows like a p-p-pin-cushion,” and to me: “I think

it’s perfectly brilliant of Sebastian to have discovered you. Where do you

lurk? I shall come down your burrow and ch-chivvy you out like an old st-t-

toat.”

安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）是第一个去的。他依次为我们

每个人请了正式的假和免费假。他对塞巴斯蒂安说：“亲爱的，我想把

你塞满带刺的箭，就像一个p-p-pin-垫子一样，”他对我说：“我认为塞

巴斯蒂安发现你真是太棒了。你潜伏在哪里？我会从你的洞穴里下

来，把你像一只老蟾蜍一样叽叽喳喳地叫出来。

The others left soon after him. I rose to go with them, but Sebastian said:

“Have some more Cointreau,” so I stayed and later he said, “I must go to

the Botanical Gardens.”

其他人在他身后不久就离开了。我起身和他们一起去，但塞巴斯蒂

安说：“再来点君度，”所以我留下来，后来他说，“我必须去植物园。

“Why?”

“为什么？”

“To see the ivy.”

“去看常春藤。”

It seemed a good enough reason and I went with him. He took my arm

as we walked under the walls of Merton.

这似乎是一个足够好的理由，我和他一起去了。当我们走到默顿的

城墙下时，他挽着我的胳膊。

“I’ve never been to the Botanical Gardens,” I said.

“我从来没有去过植物园，”我说。

“Oh, Charles, what a lot you have to learn! There’s a beautiful arch there

and more different kinds of ivy than I knew existed. I don’t know where I

should be without the Botanical Gardens.”

“哦，查尔斯，你要学的东西真多！那里有一个美丽的拱门，还有

比我所知道的更多种类的常春藤。如果没有植物园，我不知道我应该

去哪里。

When at length I returned to my rooms and found them exactly as I had

left them that morning, I detected a jejune air that had not irked me before.

What was wrong? Nothing except the golden daffodils seemed to be real.

Was it the screen? I turned it face to the wall. That was better.

当我终于回到我的房间，发现它们和我那天早上离开时一模一样

时，我闻到了一股以前没有让我感到恼火的空肠空气。出了什么问

题？除了金色的水仙花，似乎没有任何东西是真实的。是屏幕吗？我

把它面朝墙。那更好。

It was the end of the screen. Lunt never liked it, and after a few days he

took it away, to an obscure refuge he had under the stairs, full of mops and

buckets.

这是屏幕的尽头。伦特从来不喜欢它，几天后他把它带走了，带到

了楼梯下一个不起眼的避难所，里面装满了拖把和水桶。

That day was the beginning of my friendship with Sebastian, and thus it

came about, that morning in June, that I was lying beside him in the shade

of the high elms watching the smoke from his lips drift up into the

branches.

那天是我与塞巴斯蒂安友谊的开始，就这样，六月的那个早晨，我

躺在他身边，在高榆树的树荫下，看着他嘴里的烟飘到树枝上。

Presently we drove on and in another hour were hungry. We stopped at an

inn, which was half farm also, and ate eggs and bacon, pickled walnuts and

cheese, and drank our beer in a sunless parlor where an old clock ticked in

the shadows and a cat slept by the empty grate.

现在我们继续开车，再过一个小时就饿了。我们在一家旅馆停了下

来，那家旅馆也是半个农场，吃了鸡蛋和培根，腌了核桃和奶酪，在

一个没有水的客厅里喝了啤酒，那里有一个古老的时钟在阴影中滴答

作响，一只猫睡在空炉排旁。

We drove on and in the early afternoon came to our destination:

wrought-iron gates and twin, classical lodges on a village green, an avenue,

more gates, open park-land, a turn in the drive; and suddenly a new and

secret landscape opened before us. We were at the head of a valley and

below us, half a mile distant, gray and gold amid a screen of boskage, shone

the dome and columns of an old house.

我们继续前行，傍晚时分到达了目的地：锻铁大门和两座古典小

屋，位于乡村绿地上，一条大道，更多的大门，开阔的公园，一个转

弯处;突然间，一个新的秘密景观在我们面前打开了。我们身处一个山

谷的顶端，在我们脚下，半英里远的地方，灰色和金色的屏风中，闪

耀着一座老房子的圆顶和柱子。

“Well?” said Sebastian, stopping the car. Beyond the dome lay receding

steps of water and round it, guarding and hiding it, stood the soft hills.

“穹顶之外是水的退去，在它周围，守卫和隐藏着它，矗立着柔软

的山丘。

“Well?”

“嗯？”

“What a place to live in!” I said.

“真是个适合住的地方！”我说过。

“You must see the garden front and the fountain.” He leaned forward

and put the car into gear. “It’s where my family live”; and even then, rapt in

the vision, I felt, momentarily, an ominous chill at the words he used—not,

“that is my house,” but “it’s where my family live.”

“你一定要看到花园前面和喷泉。他身体前倾，把车挂上了档。“这

是我家人住的地方”;即便如此，在异象中，我还是对他所说的词语感

到一阵不祥的寒意——不是“那是我的房子”，而是“这是我家人住的地

方”。

“Don’t worry,” he continued, “they’re all away. You won’t have to meet

them.”

“别担心，”他继续说，“他们都走了。你不必见到他们。

“But I should like to.”

“但我愿意。”

“Well, you can’t. They’re in London.”

“嗯，你不能。他们在伦敦。

We drove round the front into a side court—“Everything’s shut up. We’d

better go in this way”—and entered through the fortress-like, stone-flagged,

stone-vaulted passages of the servants’ quarters—“I want you to meet

Nanny Hawkins. That’s what we’ve come for”—and climbed uncarpeted,

scrubbed elm stairs, followed more passages of wide boards covered in the

center by a thin strip of drugget, through passages covered by linoleum,

passing the wells of many minor staircases and many rows of crimson and

gold fire buckets, up a final staircase, gated at the head. The dome was

false, designed to be seen from below like the cupolas of Chambord. Its

drum was merely an additional storey full of segmental rooms. Here were

the nurseries.

我们把车开到前面的一个侧院——“一切都闭嘴了。我们最好走这

条路，“——然后从仆人宿舍的堡垒般的、石旗的、石拱形的通道进去

——”我想让你见见保姆霍金斯。这就是我们来的目的“——然后爬上

没有地毯、擦洗过的榆木楼梯，沿着更多的宽木板通道，中间覆盖着

一条薄薄的药膏，穿过油毡覆盖的通道，经过许多小楼梯的井和许多

排深红色和金色的火桶，爬上最后一个楼梯，在门口。穹顶是假的，

被设计成从下面看到，就像香波堡的圆顶一样。它的鼓只是一个额外

的楼层，里面装满了分段的房间。这里是托儿所。

Sebastian’s nanny was seated at the open window; the fountain lay

before her, the lakes, the temple, and, far away on the last spur, a glittering

obelisk; her hands lay open in her lap and, loosely between them, a rosary;

she was fast asleep. Long hours of work in her youth, authority in middle

life, repose and security in her age, had set their stamp on her lined and

serene face.

塞巴斯蒂安的保姆坐在敞开的窗户旁;喷泉、湖泊、寺庙摆在她面

前，远处的最后一根支线是一座闪闪发光的方尖碑;她的双手张开放在

膝盖上，松散地夹在两手之间，一串念珠;她很快就睡着了。她年轻时

长时间的工作，中年的权威，她这个年龄的休息和安全，在她线条和

宁静的脸上留下了印记。

“Well,” she said, waking; “this is a surprise.”

“嗯，”她说，醒来;“这是一个惊喜。”

Sebastian kissed her.

塞巴斯蒂安吻了她。

“Who’s this?” she said, looking at me. “I don’t think I know him.”

“这是谁？”她看着我说。“我想我不认识他。”

Sebastian introduced us.

塞巴斯蒂安向我们介绍了这一点。

“You’ve come just the right time. Julia’s here for the day. Such a time

they’re all having. It’s dull without them. Just Mrs. Chandler and two of the

girls and old Bert. And then they’re all going on holidays and the boiler’s

being done out in August and you going to see his Lordship in Italy, and the

rest on visits, it’ll be October before we’re settled down again. Still, I

suppose Julia must have her enjoyment the same as other young ladies,

though what they always want to go to London for in the best of the

summer and the gardens all out, I never have understood. Father Phipps was

here on Thursday and I said exactly the same to him,” she added as though

she had thus acquired sacerdotal authority for her opinion.

“你来得正是时候。茱莉亚今天来了。他们都在享受这样的时刻。

没有他们很沉闷。只有钱德勒太太和两个女孩，还有老伯特。然后他

们都去度假了，锅炉在八月完工，你要去意大利见他的领主，其余的

都在访问，十月份我们才能再次安顿下来。不过，我想茱莉亚一定和

其他年轻女士一样享受她的乐趣，尽管她们总是想在夏天和花园里去

伦敦做什么，我从来不明白。菲普斯神父星期四在这里，我对他说了

完全一样的话，“她补充说，好像她已经获得了她的意见的神圣权威。

“D’ you say Julia’s here?”

“你说茱莉亚在这里？”

“Yes, dear, you must have just missed her. It’s the Conservative Women.

Her Ladyship was to have done them, but she’s poorly. Julia won’t be long;

she’s leaving immediately after her speech, before the tea.”

“是的，亲爱的，你一定很想念她。是保守派女性。她的女神本来

应该这样做的，但她很糟糕。茱莉亚不会太久;她演讲结束后，在喝茶

之前立即离开。

“I’m afraid we may miss her again.”

“恐怕我们又想念她了。”

“Don’t do that, dear, it’ll be such a surprise to her seeing you, though

she ought to wait for the tea, I told her, it’s what the Conservative Women

come for. Now what’s the news? Are you studying hard at your books?”

“别那样做，亲爱的，她见到你会很惊讶的，虽然她应该等茶，但

我告诉她，这是保守党女人来的目的。现在有什么消息？你在努力学

习你的书吗？

“Not very, I’m afraid, nanny.”

“恐怕不是很，保姆。”

“Ah, cricketing all day long I expect, like your brother. He found time to

study, too, though. He’s not been here since Christmas, but he’ll be here for

the Agricultural, I expect. Did you see this piece about Julia in the paper?

She brought it down for me. Not that it’s nearly good enough of her, but

what it says is very nice. ‘The lovely daughter whom Lady Marchmain is

bringing out this season… witty as well as ornamental… the most popular

debutante,’ well that’s no more than the truth, though it was a shame to cut

her hair; such a lovely head of hair she had, just like her Ladyship’s. I said

to Father Phipps it’s not natural. He said: ‘Nuns do it,’ and I said, ‘Well,

surely, Father, you aren’t going to make a nun out of Lady Julia? The very

idea!’ ”

“啊，我想整天打板球，就像你哥哥一样。不过，他也抽出时间学

习。自从圣诞节以来，他就没有来过这里，但我想他会来这里参加农

业活动。你在报纸上看到这篇关于朱莉娅的文章了吗？她帮我把它拿

下来了。并不是说它对她来说已经足够好了，但它说的非常好。“马奇

曼夫人本季带出的可爱女儿......诙谐又有观赏性......最受欢迎的新人，

“好吧，这只不过是事实，尽管剪掉她的头发是一种耻辱;她有一头可

爱的头发，就像她的女主人一样。我对菲普斯神父说，这不自然。他

说：'修女会这样做，'我说，'好吧，当然，父亲，你不会把茱莉亚夫

人变成修女吗？这个主意！"

Sebastian and the old woman talked on. It was a charming room, oddly

shaped to conform with the curve of the dome. The walls were papered in a

pattern of ribbon and roses. There was a rocking horse in the corner and an

oleograph of the Sacred Heart over the mantelpiece; the empty grate was

hidden by a bunch of pampas grass and bulrushes; laid out on the top of the

chest of drawers and carefully dusted, were the collection of small presents

which had been brought home to her at various times by her children,

carved shell and lava, stamped leather, painted wood, china, bog-oak,

damascened silver, blue-john, alabaster, coral, the souvenirs of many

holidays.

塞巴斯蒂安和老妇人继续说着。这是一个迷人的房间，形状奇特，

与圆顶的曲线相得益彰。墙壁上贴着丝带和玫瑰的图案。角落里有一

匹摇马，壁炉架上有一幅圣心油画;空的炉排被一堆潘帕斯草和蒲草遮

住了;抽屉柜的顶部摆放着精心掸去灰尘的，是她的孩子们在不同时期

带回家给她的小礼物，雕刻的贝壳和熔岩，压印皮革，彩绘木头，瓷

器，沼泽橡木，大马士革银，蓝约翰，雪花石膏，珊瑚，许多节日的

纪念品。

Presently nanny said: “Ring the bell, dear, and we’ll have some tea. I

usually go down to Mrs. Chandler, but we’ll have it up here today. My usual

girl has gone to London with the others. The new one is just up from the

village. She didn’t know anything at first, but she’s coming along nicely.

Ring the bell.”

这时，保姆说：“按门铃，亲爱的，我们去喝茶。我通常去找钱德

勒夫人，但我们今天会在这里讨论。我平常的女孩和其他人一起去了

伦敦。新的就在村子里。起初她什么都不知道，但她相处得很好。按

铃。

But Sebastian said we had to go.

但塞巴斯蒂安说我们必须走。

“And miss Julia? She will be upset when she hears. It would have been

such a surprise for her.”

“茱莉亚小姐呢？当她听到时，她会不高兴。这对她来说真是太惊

喜了。

“Poor nanny,” said Sebastian when we left the nursery. “She does have

such a dull life. I’ve a good mind to bring her to Oxford to live with me,

only she’d always be trying to send me to church. We must go quickly

before my sister gets back.”

“可怜的保姆，”当我们离开托儿所时，塞巴斯蒂安说。“她的生活

确实很沉闷。我很好想把她带到牛津和我一起住，只是她总是想送我

去教堂。我们必须在我姐姐回来之前快点走。

“Which are you ashamed of, her or me?”

“你为哪个感到羞耻，她还是我？”

“I’m ashamed of myself,” said Sebastian gravely. “I’m not going to have

you get mixed up with my family. They’re so madly charming. All my life

they’ve been taking things away from me. If they once got hold of you with

their charm, they’d make you their friend not mine, and I won’t let them.”

“我为自己感到羞耻，”塞巴斯蒂安严肃地说。“我不会让你和我的

家人混在一起。他们是如此疯狂的魅力。在我的一生中，他们一直在

从我身上夺走东西。如果他们曾经用他们的魅力抓住了你，他们会把

你当作他们的朋友，而不是我的朋友，我不会让他们这样做的。

“All right,” I said. “I’m perfectly content. But am I not going to be

allowed to see any more of the house?”

“好吧，”我说。“我非常满意。但是我不能再看房子了吗？

“It’s all shut up. We came to see nanny. On Queen Alexandra’s day it’s

all open for a shilling. Well, come and look if you want to….”

“都闭嘴了。我们是来看保姆的。在亚历山德拉女王的日子里，一

切都以一先令开放。好吧，如果你想，就来看看......”

He led me through a baize door into a dark corridor; I could dimly see a

gilt cornice and vaulted plaster above; then, opening a heavy, smooth-

swinging, mahogany door, he led me into a darkened hall. Light streamed

through the cracks in the shutters. Sebastian unbarred one, and folded it

back; the mellow afternoon sun flooded in, over the bare floor, the vast,

twin fireplaces of sculptured marble, the coved ceiling frescoed with classic

deities and heroes, the gilt mirrors and scagliola pilasters, the islands of

sheeted furniture. It was a glimpse only, such as might be had from the top

of an omnibus into a lighted ballroom; then Sebastian quickly shut out the

sun. “You see,” he said; “it’s like this.”

他领着我穿过一扇白泽门，进入一条黑暗的走廊;我依稀能看到上

面的镀金檐口和拱形石膏;然后，他打开了一扇沉重的、平稳的、摆动

的桃花心木门，把我带进了一个黑暗的大厅。光线从百叶窗的缝隙中

射进来。塞巴斯蒂安解开一个，把它折回去;午后的柔和阳光洒在光秃

秃的地板上，巨大的大理石雕刻壁炉，雕刻着经典神灵和英雄的拱形

天花板壁画，镀金镜子和斯卡廖拉壁柱，以及板状家具岛。它只是一

瞥，就像从综合巴士的顶部进入一个灯火通明的宴会厅一样;然后塞巴

斯蒂安迅速关闭了太阳。“你看，”他说;“是这样的。”

His mood had changed since we had drunk our wine under the elm trees,

since we had turned the corner of the drive and he had said: “Well?”

自从我们在榆树下喝了酒，自从我们转过车道的拐角后，他的心情

就变了，他说：“嗯？

“You see, there’s nothing to see. A few pretty things I’d like to show you

one day—not now. But there’s the chapel. You must see that. It’s a

monument of art nouveau.”

“你看，没什么可看的。有一天我想给你们看一些漂亮的东西——

不是现在。但是有小教堂。你必须看到这一点。这是新艺术运动的纪

念碑。

The last architect to work at Brideshead had added a colonnade and

flanking pavilions. One of these was the chapel. We entered it by the public

porch (another door led direct to the house); Sebastian dipped his fingers in

the water stoup, crossed himself, and genuflected; I copied him. “Why do

you do that?” he asked crossly.

最后一位在布里德斯黑德工作的建筑师增加了一个柱廊和两侧的凉

亭。其中之一是小教堂。我们从公共门廊进入（另一扇门直接通向房

子）;塞巴斯蒂安将手指浸入水池中，交叉自己，真诚地说道;我复制

了他。“你为什么要这样做？”他横问道。

“Just good manners.”

“只是礼貌。”

“Well, you needn’t on my account. You wanted to do sight-seeing; how

about this?”

“好吧，你不需要在我的账户上。你想去观光;这个怎么样？

The whole interior had been gutted, elaborately refurnished and

redecorated in the arts-and-crafts style of the last decade of the nineteenth

century. Angels in printed cotton smocks, rambler-roses, flower-spangled

meadows, frisking lambs, texts in Celtic script, saints in armor, covered the

walls in an intricate pattern of clear, bright colors. There was a triptych of

pale oak, carved so as to give it the peculiar property of seeming to have

been molded in Plasticine. The sanctuary lamp and all the metal furniture

were of bronze, hand-beaten to the patina of a pock-marked skin; the altar

steps had a carpet of grass-green, strewn with white and gold daisies.

整个内部被掏空，精心翻新，并以19世纪最后十年的艺术和手工艺

风格重新装饰。穿着印花棉质罩衫的天使、漫步者玫瑰、花条纹的草

地、飞舞的羔羊、凯尔特文字的文字、穿着盔甲的圣徒，以清晰、鲜

艳的色彩错综复杂的图案覆盖了墙壁。有一幅苍白橡木的三联画，雕

刻使其具有似乎是用橡皮泥模制的特殊特性。圣所的灯和所有的金属

家具都是青铜的，用手捶打成有麻子的皮肤的铜绿;祭坛台阶上有一片

草绿色的地毯，上面散落着白色和金色的雏菊。

“Golly,” I said.

“天哪，”我说。

“It was papa’s wedding present to mama. Now, if you’ve seen enough,

we’ll go.”

“这是爸爸送给妈妈的结婚礼物。现在，如果你看够了，我们就走

了。

On the drive we passed a closed Rolls-Royce driven by a chauffeur; in

the back was a vague, girlish figure who looked round at us through the

window.

在开车途中，我们经过了一辆由司机驾驶的封闭式劳斯莱斯;后面

是一个模糊的少女身影，她透过窗户看着我们。

“Julia,” said Sebastian. “We only just got away in time.”

“茱莉亚，”塞巴斯蒂安说。“我们只是及时逃脱了。”

We stopped to speak to a man with a bicycle—“That was old Bat,” said

Sebastian—and then were away, past the wrought-iron gates, past the

lodges, and out on the road heading back to Oxford.

我们停下来和一个骑自行车的人说话——“那是老蝙蝠，”塞巴斯蒂

安说——然后就离开了，经过锻铁门，经过小屋，走上了返回牛津的

路。

“I’m sorry,” said Sebastian after a time. “I’m afraid I wasn’t very nice

this afternoon. Brideshead often has that effect on me. But I had to take you

to see nanny.”

“对不起，”塞巴斯蒂安过了一会儿说。“恐怕我今天下午不是很

好。Brideshead经常对我有这种影响。但是我得带你去看保姆。

Why? I wondered; but said nothing—Sebastian’s life was governed by a

code of such imperatives. “I must have pillar-box red pajamas,” ‘I have to

stay in bed until the sun works round to the windows,” ‘I’ve absolutely got

to drink champagne tonight!”—except, “It had quite the reverse effect on

me.”

为什么？我想知道;但什么也没说——塞巴斯蒂安的生活被这种命

令的准则所支配。“我必须穿柱盒式红色睡衣”，“我必须躺在床上，直

到太阳照到窗户上”，“我今晚绝对要喝香槟！——除了，“它对我产生

了完全相反的影响。

After a long pause he said petulantly, “I don’t keep asking you questions

about your family.”

停顿了很久之后，他烦躁地说：“我不会一直问你关于你家庭的问

题。

“Neither do I about yours.”

“我也不知道你的事。”

“But you look inquisitive.”

“但你看起来很好奇。”

“Well, you’re so mysterious about them.”

“嗯，你对他们太神秘了。”

“I hoped I was mysterious about everything.”

“我希望我对一切都很神秘。”

“Perhaps I am rather curious about people’s families—you see, it’s not a

thing I know about. There is only my father and myself. An aunt kept an

eye on me for a time but my father drove her abroad. My mother was killed

in the war.”

“也许我对人们的家庭很好奇——你看，这不是我所知道的事情。

只有我父亲和我自己。一位阿姨有一段时间一直盯着我，但我父亲开

车把她带到了国外。我的母亲在战争中丧生。

“Oh… how very unusual.”

“哦......真是太不寻常了。

“She went to Serbia with the Red Cross. My father has been rather odd

in the head ever since. He just lives alone in London with no friends and

footles about collecting things.”

“她和红十字会一起去了塞尔维亚。从那以后，我父亲的脑袋就很

奇怪。他只是一个人住在伦敦，没有朋友，也没有收集东西的脚步。

Sebastian said, “You don’t know what you’ve been saved. There are lots

of us. Look them up in Debrett.”

塞巴斯蒂安说：“你不知道你得救了什么。我们有很多人。在德布

雷特（Debrett）中查找它们。

His mood was lightening now. The further we drove from Brideshead,

the more he seemed to cast off his uneasiness—the almost furtive

restlessness and irritability that had possessed him. The sun was behind us

as we drove, so that we seemed to be in pursuit of our own shadows.

他现在的心情变得轻松起来。我们开车离布里德斯黑德越远，他似

乎就越能摆脱他的不安——那种几乎偷偷摸摸的不安和烦躁。当我们

开车时，太阳就在我们身后，所以我们似乎在追逐自己的影子。

“It’s half past five. We’ll get to Godstow in time for dinner, drink at the

Trout, leave Hardcastle’s motor-car, and walk back by the river. Wouldn’t

that be best?”

“现在是五点半。我们会及时到达戈斯托吃晚饭，在鳟鱼餐厅喝

酒，离开哈德卡斯尔的汽车，然后沿着河边走回去。那不是最好的

吗？

That is the full account of my first brief visit to Brideshead; could I have

known then that it would one day be remembered with tears by a middle-

aged captain of infantry?

这是我第一次短暂访问布里德斯黑德的全部内容;那时我能知道有

一天会被一个中年步兵上尉泪流满面地记住吗？

Two

Towards the end of that summer term I received the last visit and Grand

Remonstrance of my cousin Jasper. I was just free of the schools, having

taken the last paper of History Previous on the afternoon before; Jasper’s

subfusc suit and white tie proclaimed him still in the thick of it; he had, too,

the exhausted but resentful air of one who fears he has failed to do himself

full justice on the subject of Pindar’s Orphism. Duty alone had brought him

to my rooms that afternoon at great inconvenience to himself and, as it

happened, to me, who, when he caught me in the door, was on my way to

make final arrangements about a dinner I was giving that evening. It was

one of several parties designed to comfort Hardcastle—one of the tasks that

had lately fallen to Sebastian and me since, by leaving his car out, we had

got him into grave trouble with the proctors.

在那个夏季学期快结束时，我收到了我的表弟贾斯珀的最后一次访问

和盛大的训诫。我刚刚从学校解脱出来，前一天下午上了历史的最后

一卷;贾斯珀（Jasper）的西装和白色领带宣告他仍然穿着厚厚的衣服;

他也有一种疲惫而又怨恨的气息，他担心自己在品达的奥菲斯主义问

题上没有完全公正。那天下午，他独自一人来到我的房间，给他自己

带来了极大的不便，碰巧也给我带来了极大的不便，当他把我抓进门

时，他正在我去做最后安排那天晚上的晚餐。这是旨在安慰哈德卡斯

尔的几个聚会之一——这是塞巴斯蒂安和我最近肩负的任务之一，因

为他把车停在外面，让他与监考人员陷入了严重的麻烦。

Jasper would not sit down; this was to be no cozy chat; he stood with his

back to the fireplace and, in his own phrase, talked to me ‘like an uncle.’

贾斯珀不肯坐下;这不是一次舒适的聊天;他背对着壁炉站着，用他

自己的话说，“像叔叔一样”和我说话。

“… I’ve tried to get in touch with you several times in the last week or

two. In fact, I have the impression you are avoiding me. If that is so,

Charles, I can’t say I’m surprised.

"...在过去的一两周里，我曾多次尝试与你取得联系。事实上，我的

印象是你在躲避我。如果是这样，查尔斯，我不能说我很惊讶。

“You may think it none of my business, but I feel a sense of

responsibility. You know as well as I do that since your—well, since the

war, your father has not been really in touch with things—lives in his own

world. I don’t want to sit back and see you making mistakes which a word

in season might save you from.

“你可能认为这不关我的事，但我有一种责任感。你和我一样清

楚，因为你——嗯，自从战争以来，你的父亲就没有真正接触过事物

——生活在他自己的世界里。我不想坐视你犯错误，而季节中的一句

话可能会让你免于犯错。

“I expected you to make mistakes your first year. We all do. I got in with

some thoroughly objectionable O.S.C.U. men who ran a mission to hop-

pickers during the long vac. But you, my dear Charles, whether you realize

it or not, have gone straight, hook, line and sinker, into the very worst set in

the University. You may think that, living in digs, I don’t know what goes

on in college; but I hear things. In fact, I hear all too much. I find that I’ve

become a figure of mockery on your account at the Dining Club. There’s

that chap Sebastian Flyte you seem inseparable from. He may be all right, I

don’t know. His brother Brideshead was a very sound fellow. But this friend

of yours looks odd to me and he gets himself talked about. Of course,

they’re an odd family. The Marchmains have lived apart since the war, you

know. An extraordinary thing; everyone thought they were a devoted

couple. Then he went off to France with his Yeomanry and just never came

back. It was as if he’d been killed. She’s a Roman Catholic, so she can’t get

a divorce—or won’t, I expect. You can do anything at Rome with money,

and they’re enormously rich. Flyte may be all right, but Anthony Blanche—

now there’s a man there’s absolutely no excuse for.”

“我以为你第一年会犯错。我们都这样做。我和一些完全令人反感

的 O.S.C.U. 男人打交道，他们在漫长的假期中执行了一项任务，要求

采摘啤酒花的人。但是你，我亲爱的查尔斯，不管你是否意识到，你

已经直走了，钩子，线和坠子，进入了大学里最糟糕的环境。你可能

会认为，住在地下室里，我不知道大学里发生了什么;但我听到了一些

事情。事实上，我听到的太多了。我发现我已经成为你在餐饮俱乐部

的账户上的嘲笑人物。塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特（Sebastian Flyte）似乎与你

形影不离。他可能没事，我不知道。他的兄弟布里德斯黑德是一个非

常健全的人。但是你的这个朋友在我看来很奇怪，他被谈论了。当

然，他们是一个奇怪的家庭。你知道，自战争以来，马奇曼一家就一

直分居两地。一件非凡的事情;每个人都认为他们是一对忠诚的夫妻。

然后他带着他的Yeomanry去了法国，再也没有回来。就好像他被杀了

一样。她是罗马天主教徒，所以她不能离婚——或者不会，我估计。

在罗马，你可以用钱做任何事情，而且他们非常富有。弗莱特可能没

事，但安东尼·布兰奇——现在有一个人绝对没有借口。

“I don’t particularly like him myself,” I said.

“我自己不是特别喜欢他，”我说。

“Well, he’s always hanging round here, and the stiffer element in college

don’t like it. They can’t stand him at the House. He was in Mercury again

last night. None of these people you go about with pull any weight in their

own colleges, and that’s the real test. They think because they’ve got a lot

of money to throw about, they can do anything.

“嗯，他总是在这里闲逛，大学里比较僵硬的元素不喜欢它。他们

受不了他在家里。昨晚他又在水星了。你身边的这些人都没有在他们

自己的大学里发挥任何作用，这才是真正的考验。他们认为因为他们

有很多钱可以扔，所以他们可以做任何事情。

“And that’s another thing. I don’t know what allowance my uncle makes

you, but I don’t mind betting you’re spending double. All this,” he said,

including in a wide sweep of his hand the evidence of profligacy about him.

It was true; my room had cast its austere winter garments, and, by not very

slow stages, assumed a richer wardrobe. “Is that paid for?” (the box of a

hundred cabinet Partagas on the sideboard) “or those?” (a dozen frivolous,

new books on the table) “or those?” (a Lalique decanter and glasses) “or

that peculiarly noisome object?” (a human skull lately purchased from the

School of Medicine, which, resting in a bowl of roses, formed, at the

moment, the chief decoration of my table. It bore the motto “Et in Arcadia

ego” inscribed on its forehead.)

“这是另一回事。我不知道我舅舅给你多少零花钱，但我不介意打

赌你要花双倍的钱。所有这一切，“他说，包括大手一挥，关于他挥霍

无度的证据。这是真的;我的房间里已经换上了朴素的冬装，而且，在

不慢的阶段，我的衣橱里装得更丰富了。“这是付钱的吗？”（餐具柜

上的一百个橱柜Partagas的盒子）“还是那些？”（桌上放着十几本轻浮

的新书）“还是那些？”（莱俪醒酒器和玻璃杯）“还是那个奇怪的嘈杂

物体？”（最近从医学院购买的人类头骨，放在一碗玫瑰花中，此刻是

我餐桌上的主要装饰品。它的额头上刻有座右铭“Et in Arcadia ego”。

“Yes,” I said, glad to be clear of one charge. “I had to pay cash for the

skull.”

“是的，”我说，很高兴没有一项指控。“我不得不为头骨支付现

金。

“You can’t be doing any work. Not that that matters, particularly if

you’re making something of your career elsewhere—but are you? Have you

spoken at the Union or at any of the clubs? Are you connected with any of

the magazines? Are you even making a position in the O.U.D.S.? And your

clothes!” continued my cousin. “When you came up I remember advising

you to dress as you would in a country house. Your present get-up seems an

unhappy compromise between the correct wear for a theatrical party at

Maidenhead and a glee-singing competition in a garden suburb.

“你不能做任何工作。这并不重要，特别是如果你正在其他地方做

一些你的职业生涯——但你是吗？你有没有在联盟或任何俱乐部发表

过演讲？你与任何杂志有联系吗？你甚至在 O.U.D.S. 中占有一席之地

吗？还有你的衣服！“我表弟继续说。“当你上来的时候，我记得我建

议你穿得像在乡间别墅里一样。你现在的装扮似乎是梅登黑德戏剧派

对的正确服装和花园郊区的欢乐歌唱比赛之间的不愉快的妥协。

“And drink—no one minds a man getting tight once or twice a term. In

fact, he ought to, on certain occasions. But I hear you’re constantly seen

drunk in the middle of the afternoon.”

“还有喝酒——没人介意一个男人一两次就紧张起来。事实上，在

某些情况下，他应该这样做。但我听说你经常在午后喝醉。

He paused, his duty discharged. Already the perplexities of the

examination school were beginning to reassert themselves in his mind.

他停顿了一下，履行了自己的职责。考试学校的困惑已经开始在他

的脑海中重新出现。

“I’m sorry, Jasper,” I said. “I know it must be embarrassing for you, but

I happen to like this bad set. I like getting drunk at luncheon, and though I

haven’t yet spent quite double my allowance, I undoubtedly shall before the

end of term. I usually have a glass of champagne about this time. Will you

join me?”

“对不起，Jasper，”我说。“我知道这对你来说一定很尴尬，但我碰

巧喜欢这个糟糕的场景。我喜欢在午餐会上喝醉，虽然我还没有花掉

两倍的零花钱，但毫无疑问，我会在学期结束前花掉。我通常会在这

个时候喝一杯香槟。你愿意和我一起吗？

So my cousin Jasper despaired and, I learned later, wrote to his father on

the subject of my excesses who, in his turn, wrote to my father, who took no

action or particular thought in the matter, partly because he had disliked my

uncle for nearly sixty years and partly because, as Jasper had said, he lived

in his own world now, since my mother’s death.

因此，我的表弟贾斯珀绝望了，后来我才知道，他写信给他的父

亲，谈论我的过激行为，而他的父亲又写信给我父亲，他没有采取任

何行动或特别思考，部分原因是他不喜欢我叔叔近六十年，部分原因

是，正如贾斯珀所说，他现在生活在自己的世界里，自从我母亲去世

后。

Thus, in broad outline, Jasper sketched the more prominent features of

my first year; some detail may be added on the same scale.

因此，在大致的轮廓中，贾斯珀勾勒出了我第一年更突出的特征;

可以以相同的比例添加一些细节。

I had committed myself earlier to spend the Easter vacation with Collins

and, though I would have broken my word without compunction, and left

my former friend friendless, had Sebastian made a sign, no sign was made;

accordingly Collins and I spent several economical and instructive weeks

together in Ravenna. A bleak wind blew from the Adriatic among those

mighty tombs. In an hotel bedroom designed for a warmer season, I wrote

long letters to Sebastian and called daily at the post office for his answers.

There were two, each from a different address, neither giving any plain

news of himself, for he wrote in a style of remote fantasy—…“Mummy and

two attendant poets have three bad colds in the head, so I have come here.

It is the feast of S. Nichodemus of Thyatira, who was martyred by having

goatskin nailed to his pate, and is accordingly the patron of bald heads. Tell

Collins, who I am sure will be bald before us. There are too many people

here, but one, praise heaven! has an ear-trumpet, and that keeps me in good

humor. And now I must try to catch a fish. It is too far to send it to you so I

will keep the backbone…”—which left me fretful. Collins made notes for a

little thesis pointing out the inferiority of the original mosaics to their

photographs. Here was planted the seed of what became his life’s harvest.

When, many years later, there appeared the first massive volume of his still

unfinished work on Byzantine Art, I was touched to find among two pages

of polite, preliminary acknowledgements of debt, my own name: “… to

Charles Ryder, with the aid of whose all-seeing eyes I first saw the

Mausoleum of Galla Placidia and San Vitale…”

我早就答应和柯林斯一起度过复活节假期，尽管我会毫无愧疚地违

背诺言，让我以前的朋友失去朋友，但如果塞巴斯蒂安做了一个标

志，就没有标志了;因此，柯林斯和我一起在拉文纳度过了几个经济和

有教育意义的星期。一阵凄凉的风从亚得里亚海吹来，穿过那些巨大

的坟墓。在一间为温暖的季节设计的酒店卧室里，我给塞巴斯蒂安写

了很长的信，每天打电话到邮局寻求他的答复。有兩個人，每個人都

來自不同的地址，都沒有給出任何關於他自己的明確消息，因為他以

一種遙遠的幻想風格寫道—...「媽媽和兩個侍從的詩人頭上有三個重

感冒，所以我來到這裡。这是推雅推拉的 S. Nichodemus 的盛宴，他

因将山羊皮钉在他的肉上而殉难，因此是光头的守护神。告诉柯林

斯，我敢肯定他会在我们面前秃顶。这里的人太多了，但只有一个，

赞美上天！有一个耳喇叭，这让我保持幽默。现在我必须试着钓一条

鱼。它太远了，不能寄给你，所以我会保留骨干......“——这让我很烦

躁。柯林斯为一篇小论文做了笔记，指出原始马赛克不如他们的照

片。在这里种下了他一生收获的种子。许多年后，当他尚未完成的拜

占庭艺术著作的第一卷出版时，我感动地发现，在两页礼貌的、初步

的债务确认书中，有我自己的名字：“......查尔斯·莱德（Charles

Ryder），在他全知全能的眼睛的帮助下，我第一次看到了加拉·普拉

西迪亚（Galla Placidia）和圣维塔莱（San Vitale）的陵墓......”

I sometimes wonder whether, had it not been for Sebastian, I might have

trodden the same path as Collins round the cultural water-wheel. My father

in his youth sat for All Souls and, in a year of hot competition, failed; other

successes and honors came his way later, but that early failure impressed

itself on him, and through him on me, so that I came up with an ill-

considered sense that there lay the proper and natural goal of the life of

reason. I, too, should doubtless have failed, but, having failed, I might

perhaps have slipped into a less august academic life elsewhere. It is

conceivable, but not, I believe, likely, for the hot spring of anarchy rose

from depths where was no solid earth, and burst into the sunlight—a

rainbow in its cooling vapors—with a power the rocks could not repress.

我有时在想，如果不是塞巴斯蒂安，我是否会像柯林斯一样在文化

水车上走同样的路。我父亲年轻时参加了 All Souls，在竞争激烈的一

年中失败了;后来，他又获得了其他的成功和荣誉，但早期的失败给他

留下了深刻的印象，并通过他给我留下了深刻的印象，因此我产生了

一种考虑不周的感觉，即理性生活的正确和自然的目标就在那里。毫

无疑问，我也应该失败，但是，如果失败了，我也许会在其他地方过

上不那么庄严的学术生活。这是可以想象的，但我相信，可能性不

大，因为无政府状态的温泉从没有坚实土壤的深处升起，在阳光下迸

发出来——在它冷却的蒸气中像彩虹一样——带着岩石无法抑制的力

量。

In the event, that Easter vacation formed a short stretch of level road in

the precipitous descent of which Jasper warned me. Descent or ascent? It

seems to me that I grew younger daily with each adult habit that I acquired.

I had lived a lonely childhood and a boyhood straitened by war and

overshadowed by bereavement; to the hard bachelordom of English

adolescence, the premature dignity and authority of the school system, I had

added a sad and grim strain of my own. Now, that summer term with

Sebastian, it seemed as though I was being given a brief spell of what I had

never known, a happy childhood, and though its toys were silk shirts and

liqueurs and cigars and its naughtiness high in the catalogue of grave sins,

there was something of nursery freshness about us that fell little short of the

joy of innocence. At the end of the term I took my first schools; it was

necessary to pass, if I was to remain at Oxford, and pass I did, after a week

in which I forbade Sebastian my rooms and sat up to a late hour, with iced

black coffee and charcoal biscuits, cramming myself with the neglected

texts. I remember no syllable of them now, but the other, more ancient lore

which I acquired that term will be with me in one shape or another to my

last hour.

最终，那个复活节假期在陡峭的下坡中形成了一小段平坦的道路，

贾斯珀警告我。下降还是上升？在我看来，随着我养成的每一个成人

习惯，我每天都在变年轻。我度过了孤独的童年和童年，被战争束

缚，被丧亲之痛所笼罩;除了英国青春期艰苦的单身生活，学校系统的

过早尊严和权威之外，我还增加了自己的悲伤和严峻的压力。现在，

和塞巴斯蒂安在一起的那个暑假，我似乎得到了一个我从来不知道的

短暂的咒语，一个快乐的童年，尽管它的玩具是丝绸衬衫、利口酒和

雪茄，它的顽皮在严重的罪恶目录中名列前茅，但我们身上有一种婴

儿般的新鲜感，与纯真的快乐相差无几。在学期结束时，我上了第一

所学校;如果我要留在牛津，就必须通过，而且我确实通过了，在一个

星期之后，我禁止塞巴斯蒂安进入我的房间，坐到很晚，喝着冰黑咖

啡和木炭饼干，把自己塞满了被忽视的文本。我现在不记得它们的音

节了，但是我获得这个词的另一个更古老的传说将以一种或另一种形

式伴随我，直到我的最后一小时。

“I like this bad set and I like getting drunk at luncheon”; that was

enough then. Is more needed now?

“我喜欢这个糟糕的布景，我喜欢在午餐会上喝醉”;这就足够了。现

在需要更多吗？

Looking back, now, after twenty years, there is little I would have left

undone or done otherwise. I could match my cousin Jasper’s game-cock

maturity with a sturdier fowl. I could tell him that all the wickedness of that

time was like the spirit they mix with the pure grape of the Douro, heady

stuff full of dark ingredients; it at once enriched and retarded the whole

process of adolescence as the spirit checks the fermentation of the wine,

renders it undrinkable, so that it must lie in the dark, year in, year out, until

it is brought up at last fit for the table.

现在回想起来，二十年过去了，我几乎没有什么可以不做或做的。

我可以用一只更结实的家禽来匹配我表弟贾斯珀的野鸡成熟度。我可

以告诉他，那个时代所有的邪恶就像他们与杜罗河纯葡萄混合的精神

一样，充满了黑暗成分的令人陶醉的东西;它立即丰富和延缓了青春期

的整个过程，因为精神检查了葡萄酒的发酵，使它无法饮用，因此它

必须年复一年地躺在黑暗中，直到它最终适合餐桌。

I could tell him, too, that to know and love one other human being is the

root of all wisdom. But I felt no need for these sophistries as I sat before my

cousin, saw him, freed from his inconclusive struggle with Pindar, in his

dark gray suit, his white tie, his scholar’s gown; heard his grave tones and,

all the time, savored the gillyflowers in full bloom under my windows. I

had my secret and sure defense, like a talisman worn in the bosom, felt for

in the moment of danger, found and firmly grasped. So I told him what was

not in fact the truth, that I usually had a glass of champagne about that time,

and asked him to join me.

我也可以告诉他，认识和爱另一个人是所有智慧的根源。但是，当

我坐在我的表弟面前，看到他从与品达的无果而终的斗争中解脱出来

时，我觉得没有必要进行这些诡辩，他穿着深灰色的西装，打着白色

的领带，穿着学者的长袍;听着他严肃的语气，一直细细品味着窗下盛

开的吉莉花。我有我秘密而坚定的防御，就像戴在怀里的护身符，在

危险的时刻感觉到，被发现并牢牢抓住。于是我告诉他事实并非如

此，那段时间我通常会喝一杯香槟，并请他和我一起去。

On the day after Jasper’s Grand Remonstrance I received another, in

different terms and from an unexpected source.

在贾斯珀的大训诫之后的第二天，我收到了另一封信，措辞不同，来

源出乎意料。

All the term I had been seeing rather more of Anthony Blanche than my

liking for him warranted. I lived now among his friends, but our frequent

meetings were more of his choosing than mine, for I held him in

considerable awe.

我一直以来对安东尼·布兰奇的评价都超过了我对他的喜欢。我现

在住在他的朋友中间，但我们经常见面更多的是他选择的，而不是我

的，因为我对他相当敬畏。

In years, he was barely my senior, but he seemed then to be burdened

with the experience of the Wandering Jew. He was indeed a nomad of no

nationality.

几年后，他勉强算得上我的前辈，但那时他似乎背负着流浪犹太人

的经历。他确实是一个没有国籍的游牧民族。

An attempt had been made in his childhood to make an Englishman of

him; he was two years at Eton; then in the middle of the war he had defied

the submarines, rejoined his mother in the Argentine, and a clever and

audacious school-boy was added to the valet, the maid, the two chauffeurs,

the pekinese and the second husband. Criss-cross about the world he

travelled with them, waxing in wickedness like a Hogarthian page boy.

When peace came they returned to Europe, to hotels and furnished villas,

spas, casinos and bathing beaches. At the age of fifteen, for a wager, he was

disguised as a girl and taken to play at the big table in the Jockey Club at

Buenos Aires; he dined with Proust and Gide and was on closer terms with

Cocteau and Diaghilev; Firbank sent him his novels with fervent

inscriptions; he had aroused three irreconcilable feuds in Capri; by his own

account he had practiced black art in Cefalù and had been cured of drug-

taking in California and of an Oedipus complex in Vienna.

在他的童年时代，曾试图使他成为英国人;他在伊顿公学读了两年;

然后在战争中期，他蔑视潜艇，在阿根廷与他的母亲团聚，一个聪明

而大胆的小学生被添加到男仆、女仆、两个司机、北京人和第二任丈

夫中。他和他们一起环游世界，像一个霍加斯式的男孩一样在邪恶中

穿梭。当和平到来时，他们回到了欧洲，回到了酒店和带家具的别

墅、水疗中心、赌场和沐浴海滩。十五岁那年，为了打赌，他伪装成

女孩，被带到布宜诺斯艾利斯赛马会的大牌桌上玩;他与普鲁斯特和纪

德共进晚餐，与科克多和佳吉列夫关系密切;菲尔班克寄给他他的小

说，上面写满了热情的题词;他在卡普里岛激起了三场不可调和的争

斗;据他自己说，他曾在切法卢从事黑人艺术，并在加利福尼亚和维也

纳的俄狄浦斯情结中治愈了吸毒。

At times we all seemed children beside him—at most times, but not

always, for there was a bluster and zest in Anthony which the rest of us had

shed somewhere in our more leisured adolescence, on the playing field or in

the school-room; his vices flourished less in the pursuit of pleasure than in

the wish to shock, and in the midst of his polished exhibitions I was often

reminded of an urchin I had once seen in Naples, capering derisively, with

obscene, unambiguous gestures, before a party of English tourists; as he

told the tale of his evening at the gaming table, one could see in the roll of

his eye just how he had glanced, covertly, over the dwindling pile of chips

at his step-father’s party; while we had been rolling one another in the mud

at football and gorging ourselves with crumpets, Anthony had helped oil

fading beauties on sub-tropical sands and had sipped his apéritif in smart

little bars, so that the savage we had tamed was still rampant in him. He was

cruel, too, in the wanton, insect-maiming manner of the very young, and

fearless like a little boy, charging, head down, small fists whirling, at the

school prefects.

有时，我们都像是他身边的孩子——大多数时候，但并非总是如

此，因为安东尼身上有一种咆哮和热情，而我们其他人在我们更悠闲

的青春期的某个地方，在运动场上或在教室里流下了这种热情;他的恶

习与其说是在追求享乐，不如说是在震惊的愿望中蓬勃发展，在他精

美的展览中，我经常想起我曾经在那不勒斯看到的一只顽童，在一群

英国游客面前，用淫秽的、毫不含糊的手势嘲弄地嘲笑;当他在赌桌上

讲述他晚上的故事时，人们可以从他的翻白眼中看出他是如何在继父

的派对上偷偷地瞥了一眼越来越少的筹码的;当我们在足球场上在泥泞

中互相打滚，狼吞虎咽地吃着面包屑时，安东尼在亚热带沙滩上帮助

褪色的美女，在聪明的小酒吧里啜饮他的开胃酒，所以我们驯服的野

蛮人仍然在他身上猖獗。他也很残忍，像年幼的孩子那样肆无忌惮，

残害昆虫，像个小男孩一样无所畏惧，低着头，挥舞着小拳头，冲向

学校的级长。

He asked me to dinner, and I was a little disconcerted to find that we

were to dine alone. “We are going to Thame,” he said. “There is a delightful

hotel there, which luckily doesn’t appeal to the Bullingdon. We will drink

Rhine wine and imagine ourselves… where? Not on a j-j-jaunt with J-J-

Jorrocks, anyway. But first we will have our apéritif.”

他请我吃饭，我有点不安地发现我们要一个人吃饭。“我们要去泰

晤士河，”他说。“那里有一家令人愉快的酒店，幸运的是它对

Bullingdon没有吸引力。我们将喝莱茵河葡萄酒，想象自己......哪里？

无论如何，不是和 J-J-Jorrocks 一起参加 j-j-j-jaunt。但首先，我们将有

我们的开胃酒。

At the George bar he ordered ‘Four Alexandra cocktails, please,” ranged

them before him with a loud “Yum-yum” which drew every eye, outraged,

upon him. “I expect you would prefer sherry, but, my dear Charles, you are

not going to have sherry. Isn’t this a delicious concoction? You don’t like it?

Then I will drink it for you. One, two, three, four, down the red lane they

go. How the students stare!” And he led me out to the waiting motor-car.

在乔治酒吧，他点了“请喝四杯亚历山德拉鸡尾酒”，大声的“Yum-

yum”在他们面前响起，这吸引了所有人的目光，愤怒地看着他。“我

想你会喜欢雪利酒，但是，我亲爱的查尔斯，你不会喝雪利酒的。这

不是美味的混合物吗？你不喜欢吗？那我就给你喝。一、二、三、

四，沿着红色车道走。学生们瞪得多么厉害！他把我领到等候的汽车

前。

“I hope we shall find no undergraduates there. I am a little out of

sympathy with them for the moment. You heard about their treatment of me

on Thursday? It was too naughty. Luckily I was wearing my oldest pajamas

and it was an evening of oppressive heat, or I might have been seriously

cross.” Anthony had a habit of putting his face near one when he spoke; the

sweet and creamy cocktail had tainted his breath. I leaned away from him in

the corner of the hired car.

“我希望我们在那里找不到本科生。我现在对他们有点不同情。你

听说他们星期四对我的待遇了吗？太调皮了。幸运的是，我穿着我最

旧的睡衣，那是一个酷热的夜晚，否则我可能会被严重地穿越。安东

尼有个习惯，说话时会把脸靠近一个人;甜美的奶油鸡尾酒污染了他的

呼吸。我靠在租来的车的角落里，远离他。

“Picture me, my dear, alone and studious. I had just bought a rather

forbidding book called Antic Hay, which I knew I must read before going to

Garsington on Sunday, because everyone was bound to talk about it, and it’s

so banal saying you have not read the book of the moment, if you haven’t.

The solution I suppose is not to go to Garsington, but that didn’t occur to

me until this moment. So, my dear, I had an omelet and a peach and a bottle

of Vichy water and put on my pajamas and settled down to read. I must say

my thoughts wandered, but I kept turning the pages and watching the light

fade, which in Peckwater, my dear, is quite an experience—as darkness falls

the stone seems positively to decay under one’s eyes. I was reminded of

some of those leprous façades in the vieux port at Marseille, until suddenly

I was disturbed by such a bawling and caterwauling as you never heard, and

there, down in the little piazza, I saw a mob of about twenty terrible young

men, and do you know what they were chanting? ‘We want Blanche. We

want Blanche,’ in a kind of litany. Such a public declaration! Well, I saw it

was all up with Mr. Huxley for the evening, and I must say I had reached a

point of tedium when any interruption was welcome. I was stirred by the

bellows, but, do you know, the louder they shouted, the shyer they seemed?

They kept saying ‘Where’s Boy?’ ‘He’s Boy Mulcaster’s friend,’ ‘Boy must

bring him down.’ Of course you’ve met Boy? He’s always popping in and

out of dear Sebastian’s rooms. He’s everything we dagos expect of an

English lord. A great parti I can assure you. All the young ladies in London

are after him. He’s very hoity-toity with them, I’m told. My dear, he’s

scared stiff. A great oaf—that’s Mulcaster—and what’s more, my dear, a

cad. He came to le Touquet at Easter and, in some extraordinary way, I

seemed to have asked him to stay. He lost some infinitesimal sum at cards,

and as a result expected me to pay for all his treats—well, Mulcaster was in

this party; I could see his ungainly form shuffling about below and hear him

saying: ‘It’s no good. He’s out. Let’s go back and have a drink?’ So then I

put my head out of the window and called to him: ‘Good evening,

Mulcaster, old sponge and toady, are you lurking among the hobbledehoys?

Have you came to repay me the three hundred francs I lent you for the poor

drab you picked up in the Casino? It was a niggardly sum for her trouble,

and what a trouble, Mulcaster. Come up and pay me, poor hooligan!’

“想象一下我，亲爱的，孤独而好学。我剛剛買了一本相當令人生

畏的書，名叫《安蒂克·海伊》（Antic Hay），我知道我必須在星期天

去加辛頓之前讀一讀，因為每個人都會談論它，而說你沒有讀過當下

這本書，這是太平庸了，如果你沒有。我想解决办法是不要去加辛

顿，但直到这一刻我才想到这一点。所以，亲爱的，我吃了一个煎蛋

卷、一个桃子和一瓶维希水，穿上睡衣，坐下来阅读。我必须说我的

思绪飘忽不定，但我不停地翻着书页，看着光线逐渐消失，亲爱的，

在佩克沃特，这真是一种体验——当黑暗降临时，石头似乎在一个人

的眼前腐烂。我想起了马赛老港的一些麻风病门面，直到突然间，我

被你从未听过的喧嚣和喧嚣所打扰，在那里，在小广场上，我看到一

群大约二十个可怕的年轻人，你知道他们在吟唱什么吗？“我们想要布

兰奇。我们想要布兰奇，“在一连串的表达中。这样的公开声明！好

吧，我看到赫胥黎先生晚上都忙得不可开交，我必须说，我已经到了

乏味的地步，欢迎任何打扰。我被风箱激怒了，但是，你知道吗，他

们喊得越大声，他们看起来就越害羞？他们不停地说'男孩在哪里？

“他是男孩穆尔卡斯特的朋友，”“男孩必须把他打倒。你当然见过男

孩？他总是在亲爱的塞巴斯蒂安的房间里进进出出。他是我们达戈斯

对英国领主所期望的一切。我可以向你保证，这是一个伟大的部分。

伦敦所有的年轻女士都在追求他。我被告知，他对他们非常圣洁。亲

爱的，他吓得浑身僵硬。一个伟大的oaf——那是Mulcaster——更重要

的是，我的挚爱，一个cad。他在复活节来到勒图凯，以某种非同寻

常的方式，我似乎要求他留下来。他在纸牌上输了一小笔钱，结果希

望我支付他所有的款待——好吧，穆尔卡斯特参加了这个聚会;我能看

到他笨拙的身躯在下面晃来晃去，听到他说：'这不好。他出去了。咱

们回去喝一杯吧？于是我把头伸出窗外，对他喊道：“晚上好，穆尔卡

斯特，老海绵和癞蛤蟆，你潜伏在流浪汉中间吗？你是来报答我借给

你的三百法郎，是因为你在赌场捡到的那件可怜的单调物吗？对于她

的麻烦来说，这是一笔微不足道的钱，真是个麻烦，Mulcaster。上来

付钱给我，可怜的流氓！’

“That, my dear, seemed to put a little life into them, and up the stairs

they came, clattering. About six of them came into my room, the rest stood

mouthing outside. My dear, they looked too extraordinary. They had been

having one of their ridiculous club dinners, and they were all wearing

colored tail-coats—a sort of livery. ‘My dears,’ I said to them, ‘you look

like a lot of most disorderly footmen.’ Then one of them, rather a juicy little

piece, accused me of unnatural vices. ‘My dear,’ I said, ‘I may be inverted

but I am not insatiable. Come back when you are alone.’ Then they began

to blaspheme in a very shocking manner, and suddenly I, too, began to be

annoyed. ‘Really,’ I thought, ‘when I think of all the hullabaloo there was

when I was seventeen, and the Duc de Vincennes (old Armand, of course,

not Philippe) challenged me to a duel for an affair of the heart, and very

much more than the heart, I assure you, with the duchess (Stefanie, of

course, not old Poppy)—now, to submit to impertinence from these pimply,

tipsy virgins…’ Well, I gave up the light, bantering tone and let myself be

just a little offensive.

“那，我的挚爱，似乎给他们带来了一点生命，他们走上楼梯，咔

嚓咔嚓地走来。大约有六个人走进了我的房间，其余的人站在外面叽

叽喳喳。亲爱的，他们看起来太不平凡了。他们正在参加一场荒谬的

俱乐部晚宴，他们都穿着彩色的燕尾服——一种制服。“亲爱的，”我

对他们说，“你们看起来就像许多最混乱的步兵。然后其中一个，相当

多汁的小块，指责我有不自然的恶习。“亲爱的，”我说，“我可能倒过

来了，但我不是贪得无厌的。当你一个人的时候回来。然后他们开始

以一种非常令人震惊的方式亵渎神明，突然间我也开始生气了。“真

的，”我想，“当我想到我十七岁的时候，文森公爵（当然是老阿尔

芒，不是菲利普）向我发起挑战，要我为一件心灵的婚外情而决斗，

而且比心灵的决斗要多得多，我向你保证，与公爵夫人（当然，斯蒂

芬妮，不是老波比）——现在，屈服于这些长痘痘、醉醺醺的处女的

无礼......”好吧，我放弃了轻松、戏谑的语气，让自己有点冒犯。

“Then they began saying, ‘Get hold of him. Put him in Mercury.’ Now

as you know I have two sculptures by Brancusi and several pretty things

and I did not want them to start getting rough, so I said, pacifically, ‘Dear

sweet clodhoppers, if you knew anything of sexual psychology you would

know that nothing could give me keener pleasure than to be manhandled by

you meaty boys. It would be an ecstasy of the very naughtiest kind. So if

any of you wishes to be my partner in joy come and seize me. If, on the

other hand, you simply wish to satisfy some obscure and less easily

classified libido and see me bathe, come with me quietly, dear louts, to the

fountain.’

“然后他们开始说，'抓住他。把他放在水星里。现在，如你所知，

我有两件布朗库西的雕塑和几件漂亮的东西，我不想让它们变得粗

糙，所以我平静地说，“亲爱的甜蜜的蛤蟆，如果你对性心理学有所了

解，你就会知道，没有什么比被你们这些肉男孩粗暴对待更能给我带

来更强烈的快感了。这将是一种非常顽皮的狂喜。所以，如果你们中

有人想成为我喜乐的伙伴，就来抓住我吧。另一方面，如果你只是想

满足一些晦涩难懂的、不容易分类的，看我洗澡，那就悄悄地跟我来

吧，亲爱的，到喷泉去。

“Do you know, they all looked a little foolish at that? I walked down

with them and no one came within a yard of me. Then I got into the

fountain and, you know, it was really most refreshing, so I sported there a

little and struck some attitudes, until they turned about and walked sulkily

home, and I heard Boy Mulcaster saying, ‘Anyway, we did put him in

Mercury.’ You know, Charles, that is just what they’ll be saying in thirty

years’ time. When they’re all married to scraggy little women like hens and

have cretinous porcine sons like themselves getting drunk at the same club

dinner in the same colored coats, they’ll still say, when my name is

mentioned, ‘We put him in Mercury one night,’ and their barnyard

daughters will snigger and think their father was quite a dog in his day, and

what a pity he’s grown so dull. Oh, la fatigue du Nord!”

“你知道吗，他们看起来都有点傻？我和他们一起走下去，没有人

靠近我一码。然后我钻进了喷泉，你知道，它真的是最令人耳目一新

的，所以我在那里运动了一下，并采取了一些态度，直到他们转过身

来，闷闷不乐地走回家，我听到男孩穆尔卡斯特说，'不管怎样，我们

确实把他放在了水星里。你知道，查尔斯，这就是他们三十年后会说

的话。当他们都娶了像母鸡一样的瘦小女人，有像他们这样的白痴猪

儿子穿着同样颜色的外套在同一个俱乐部的晚宴上喝醉时，他们仍然

会说，当提到我的名字时，“有一天晚上我们把他放在水星上，”他们

的稗子女儿会傻笑，认为他们的父亲在他那个时代是一条狗，可惜他

变得如此迟钝。噢，la fatigue du Nord！

It was not, I knew, the first time Anthony had been ducked, but the

incident seemed much on his mind, for he reverted to it again at dinner.

我知道，这不是安东尼第一次被躲避，但这件事似乎在他的脑海

中，因为他在晚餐时又想起了这件事。

“Now you can’t imagine an unpleasantness like that happening to

Sebastian, can you?”

“现在你无法想象塞巴斯蒂安会发生这样的不愉快，对吧？”

“No,” I said; I could not.

“不，”我说;我不能。

“No, Sebastian has charm”; he held up his glass of hock to the candle-

light and repeated, “such charm. Do you know, I went round to call on

Sebastian next day? I thought the tale of my evening’s adventures might

amuse him. And what do you think I found—besides, of course, his

amusing toy bear? Mulcaster and two of his cronies of the night before.

They looked very foolish and Sebastian, as composed as Mrs. P-p-

ponsonby-de-Tomkyns in P-p-punch, said, ‘You know Lord Mulcaster, of

course,’ and the oafs said, ‘Oh, we just came to see how Aloysius was,’ for

they find the toy bear just as amusing as we do—or, shall I hint, just a teeny

bit more? So off they went. And I said, ‘S-s-sebastian, do you realize that

those s-sycophantic s-slugs insulted me last night, and but for the warmth of

the weather might have given me a s-s-severe cold,’ and he said, ‘Poor

things. I expect they were drunk.’ He has a kind word for everyone, you

see; he has such charm.

“不，塞巴斯蒂安有魅力”;他把酒杯举到烛光下，重复道：“真有魅

力。你知道吗，第二天我去拜访塞巴斯蒂安了吗？我想我晚上的冒险

故事可能会逗他开心。你认为我发现了什么——当然，除了他有趣的

玩具熊？穆尔卡斯特和他前一天晚上的两个亲信。他们看起来很傻，

塞巴斯蒂安，就像P-p-ponsonby-de-Tomkyns太太一样镇定自若，说，

“你当然认识马尔卡斯特勋爵，”而那些小家伙说，“哦，我们只是来看

看阿洛伊修斯怎么样，”因为他们觉得玩具熊和我们一样有趣——或

者，我可以暗示一下，只是多了一点点？于是他们就走了。我说，'塞

巴斯蒂安，你知道吗，昨晚那些阿谀奉承的蛞蝓侮辱了我，要不是天

气暖和，我可能会得了严重的感冒，'他说，'可怜的东西。我猜他们喝

醉了。你对每个人都有一句好话，你看;他有这样的魅力。

“I can see he has completely captivated you, my dear Charles. Well, I’m

not surprised. Of course, you haven’t known him as long as I have. I was at

school with him. You wouldn’t believe it, but in those days people used to

say he was a little bitch; just a few unkind boys who knew him well.

Everyone in pop liked him, of course, and all the masters. I expect it was

really that they were jealous of him. He never seemed to get into trouble.

The rest of us were constantly being beaten in the most savage way, on the

most frivolous pretexts, but never Sebastian. He was the only boy in my

house who was never beaten at all. I can see him now, at the age of fifteen.

He never had spots you know; all the other boys were spotty. Boy

Mulcaster was positively scrofulous. But not Sebastian. Or did he have one,

rather a stubborn one at the back of his neck? I think, now, that he did.

Narcissus, with one pustule. He and I were both Catholics, so we used to go

to mass together. He used to spend such a time in the confessional, I used to

wonder what he had to say, because he never did anything wrong; never

quite; at least, he never got punished. Perhaps he was just being charming

through the grille. I left under what is called a cloud, you know—I can’t

think why it is called that; it seemed to me a glare of unwelcome light; the

process involved a series of harrowing interviews with m’tutor. It was

disconcerting to find how observant that mild old man proved to be. The

things he knew about me, which I thought no one—except possibly

Sebastian—knew. It was a lesson never to trust mild old men—or charming

school boys; which?

“我看得出来，他已经完全迷住了你，我亲爱的查尔斯。好吧，我

并不感到惊讶。当然，你认识他的时间不如我长。我和他一起上学。

你不会相信，但在那些日子里，人们常说他是个小婊子;只是几个很了

解他的不友善的男孩。当然，流行音乐界的每个人都喜欢他，所有的

大师也喜欢他。我想他们真的嫉妒他。他似乎从来没有惹过麻烦。我

们其他人不断以最野蛮的方式，以最轻浮的借口被殴打，但塞巴斯蒂

安从来没有。他是我家里唯一一个从未被殴打过的男孩。我现在可以

看到他，十五岁。他从来没有斑点，你知道的;所有其他男孩都是参差

不齐的。男孩穆尔卡斯特（Boy Mulcaster）非常狡猾。但不是塞巴斯

蒂安。还是他的脖子后面有一个，相当顽固的？我想，现在，他做到

了。水仙，有一个脓疱。他和我都是天主教徒，所以我们经常一起去

参加弥撒。他曾经在忏悔室里度过这样的时光，我曾经想知道他要说

什么，因为他从来没有做错任何事;从不完全是;至少，他从未受到惩

罚。也许他只是透过格栅迷人。我离开了所谓的云层，你知道——我

想不出为什么叫它;在我看来，这似乎是一缕不受欢迎的光芒;这个过

程涉及对 M'Tutor 的一系列令人痛苦的采访。令人不安的是，发现那

个温和的老人竟然如此善于观察。他知道的关于我的事情，我以为没

有人知道——除了塞巴斯蒂安——知道。这是一个教训，永远不要相

信温和的老人或迷人的男生;哪？

“Shall we have another bottle of this wine, or of something different?

Something different, some bloody, old Burgundy, eh? You see, Charles, I

understand all your tastes. You must come to France with me and drink the

wine. We will go at the vintage. I will take you to stay at the Vincennes. It is

all made up with them now, and he has the finest wine in France; he and the

Prince de Portallon—I will take you there, too. I think they would amuse

you, and of course they would love you. I want to introduce you to a lot of

my friends. I have told Cocteau about you. He is all agog. You see, my dear

Charles, you are that very rare thing, An Artist. Oh yes, you must not look

bashful. Behind that cold, English, phlegmatic exterior you are An Artist. I

have seen those little drawings you keep hidden away in your room. They

are exquisite. And you, dear Charles, if you will understand me, are not

exquisite; but not at all. Artists are not exquisite. I am; Sebastian, in a kind

of way, is exquisite, but the artist is an eternal type, solid, purposeful,

observant—and, beneath it all, p-p-passionate, eh, Charles?

“我们要再来一瓶这种酒，还是别的酒？有些不同，有些血腥，古

老的勃艮第，嗯？你看，查尔斯，我了解你所有的口味。你必须和我

一起去法国喝酒。我们会去年份。我会带你去文森斯。现在一切都由

他们组成，他拥有法国最好的葡萄酒;他和德·波塔隆亲王——我也要带

你去那里。我想他们会逗你开心，当然他们会爱你。我想把你介绍给

我的很多朋友。我已经把你的事告诉了科克托。他全都痛苦不堪。你

看，我亲爱的查尔斯，你是那种非常罕见的东西，一个艺术家。哦，

是的，你不能看起来很害羞。在那冷酷、英式、痞气的外表背后，你

是一个艺术家。我看过你藏在房间里的那些小画。它们很精致。而

你，亲爱的查尔斯，如果你能理解我的话，并不精致;但一点也不。艺

术家并不精致。我是;在某种程度上，塞巴斯蒂安是精致的，但艺术家

是一个永恒的类型，坚实，有目的，观察力强——而且，在这一切之

下，p-p-热情，嗯，查尔斯？

“But who recognizes you? The other day I was speaking to Sebastian

about you, and I said, ‘But you know Charles is an artist. He draws like a

young Ingres,’ and do you know what Sebastian said?—‘Yes, Aloysius

draws very prettily, too, but of course he’s rather more modern.’ So

charming; so amusing.

“但是谁认得你呢？有一天，我和塞巴斯蒂安谈起你，我说，'但你

知道查尔斯是个艺术家。他画得像个年轻的安格尔，“你知道塞巴斯蒂

安是怎么说的吗？——”是的，阿洛伊修斯也画得很漂亮，但他当然更

现代。如此迷人;太有趣了。

“Of course those that have charm don’t really need brains. Stefanie de

Vincennes really tickled me four years ago. My dear, I even used the same

colored varnish for my toe-nails. I used her words and lit my cigarette in the

same way and spoke with her tone on the telephone so that the Duke used to

carry on long and intimate conversations with me, thinking that I was her. It

was largely that which put his mind on pistol and sabers in such an old-

fashioned manner. My step-father thought it an excellent education for me.

He thought it would make me grow out of what he calls my ‘English

habits.’ Poor man, he is very South American…. I never heard anyone

speak an ill word of Stefanie, except the Duke: and she, my dear, is

positively cretinous.”

“当然，那些有魅力的人并不需要大脑。四年前，斯蒂芬妮·德·文森

斯（Stefanie de Vincennes）真的让我发痒。亲爱的，我什至在我的脚

趾甲上使用了相同颜色的清漆。我用她的话，用同样的方式点燃我的

香烟，用她的语气在电话里说话，这样公爵就习惯和我进行长时间而

亲密的交谈，以为我是她。很大程度上，正是这种方式使他的思想以

如此老式的方式放在了手枪和军刀上。我的继父认为这对我来说是一

种很好的教育。他认为这会让我摆脱他所谓的“英语习惯”。可怜的

人，他很南美......我从来没听过有人说过斯蒂芬妮的坏话，除了公爵，

她，我的挚爱，真是个白痴。

Anthony had lost his stammer in the deep waters of his old romance. It

came floating back to him, momentarily, with the coffee and liqueurs. “Real

G-g-green Chartreuse, made before the expulsion of the monks. There are

five distinct tastes as it trickles over the tongue. It is like swallowing a sp-

spectrum. Do you wish Sebastian was with us? Of course you do. Do I? I

wonder. How our thoughts do run on that little bundle of charm to be sure. I

think you must be mesmerizing me, Charles. I bring you here, at very

considerable expense, my dear, simply to talk about myself, and I find I talk

of no one except Sebastian. It’s odd because there’s really no mystery about

him except how he came to be born of such a very sinister family.

安东尼在他旧恋情的深水中失去了结结巴巴。它飘回了他身边，一

会儿，带着咖啡和利口酒。“真正的 G-g-green Chartreuse，在驱逐僧侣

之前制作。当它涓涓细流在舌头上时，有五种不同的味道。这就像吞

下 sp 光谱一样。你希望塞巴斯蒂安和我们在一起吗？你当然知道，我

呢？我想知道。可以肯定的是，我们的思想是如何在那一小束魅力上

运行的。我想你一定让我着迷了，查尔斯。亲爱的，我花大价钱把你

带到这里来，只是为了谈谈我自己，我发现除了塞巴斯蒂安，我没有

谈论任何人。这很奇怪，因为除了他是如何出生在这样一个非常险恶

的家庭之外，他真的没有什么神秘之处。

“I forget if you know his family. I don’t suppose he’ll ever let you meet

them. He’s far too clever. They’re quite, quite gruesome. Do you ever feel

there is something a teeny bit gruesome about Sebastian? No? Perhaps I

imagine it; it’s simply that he looks so like the rest of them, sometimes.

“我忘了你是否认识他的家人。我不认为他会让你见到他们。他太

聪明了。它们非常非常可怕。你有没有觉得塞巴斯蒂安有点可怕？

不？也许我想象出来;只是他有时看起来很像其他人。

“There’s Brideshead who’s something archaic, out of a cave that’s been

sealed for centuries. He has the face as though an Aztec sculptor had

attempted a portrait of Sebastian; he’s a learned bigot, a ceremonious

barbarian, a snow-bound lama…. Well, anything you like. And Julia, you

know what she looks like. Who could help it? Her photograph appears as

regularly in the illustrated papers as the advertisements for Beecham’s Pills.

A face of flawless Florentine quattrocento beauty; almost anyone else with

those looks would have been tempted to become artistic; not Lady Julia;

she’s as smart as—well, as smart as Stefanie. Nothing greenery-yallery

about her. So gay, so correct, so unaffected. I wonder if she’s incestuous. I

doubt it; all she wants is power. There ought to be an Inquisition especially

set up to burn her. There’s another sister, too, I believe, in the schoolroom.

Nothing is known of her yet except that her governess went mad and

drowned herself not long ago. I’m sure she’s abominable. So you see there

was really very little left for poor Sebastian to do except be sweet and

charming.

“有个新娘头，她是个古老的东西，从一个被封印了几个世纪的洞

穴里出来。他的脸仿佛是阿兹特克雕塑家试图为塞巴斯蒂安画像;他是

一个博学的偏执狂，一个有礼貌的野蛮人，一个被雪封的喇嘛......好

吧，任何你喜欢的东西。还有茱莉亚，你知道她长什么样子。谁能帮

上忙？她的照片经常出现在插图报纸上，就像Beecham's Pills的广告一

样。一张完美无瑕的佛罗伦萨quattrocento之美的脸;几乎任何拥有这些

外表的人都会被诱惑成为艺术家;不是茱莉亚夫人;她和斯蒂芬妮一样

聪明。她没什么绿意盎然的。如此同性恋，如此正确，如此不受影

响。我想知道她是不是。我怀疑;她想要的只是权力。应该有一个专门

设立的宗教裁判所来烧死她。我相信，教室里还有另一个姐姐。除了

她的家庭教师不久前发疯溺水身亡外，对她一无所知。我敢肯定她是

可恶的。所以你看，可怜的塞巴斯蒂安除了甜美迷人之外，真的没有

什么可做的了。

“It’s when one gets to the parents that a bottomless pit opens. My dear,

such a pair. How does Lady Marchmain manage it? It is one of the

questions of the age. You have seen her? Very, very beautiful; no artifice,

her hair just turning gray in elegant silvery streaks, no rouge, very pale,

huge-eyed—it is extraordinary how large those eyes look and how the lids

are veined blue where anyone else would have touched them with a finger-

tip of paint; pearls and a few great starlike jewels, heirlooms, in ancient

settings, a voice as quiet as a prayer, and as powerful. And Lord

Marchmain, well, a little fleshy perhaps, but very handsome, a magnifico, a

voluptuary, Byronic, bored, infectiously slothful, not at all the sort of man

you would expect to see easily put down. And that Reinhardt nun, my dear,

has destroyed him—but utterly. He daren’t show his great purple face

anywhere. He is the last, historic, authentic case of someone being hounded

out of society. Brideshead won’t see him, the girls mayn’t, Sebastian does,

of course, because he’s so charming. No one else goes near him. Why, last

September Lady Marchmain was in Venice staying at the Palazzo Fogliere.

To tell you the truth she was just a teeny bit ridiculous in Venice. She never

went near the Lido, of course, but she was always drifting about the canals

in a gondola with Sir Adrian Porson—such attitudes, my dear, like Madame

Récamier; once I passed them and I caught the eye of the Fogliere

gondolier, whom, of course, I knew, and, my dear, he gave me such a wink.

She came to all the parties in a sort of cocoon of gossamer, my dear, as

though she were part of some Celtic play or a heroine from Maeterlinck;

and she would go to church. Well, as you know, Venice is the one town in

Italy where no one ever has gone to church. Anyway, she was rather a

figure of fun that year, and then who should turn up, in the Maltons’ yacht,

but poor Lord Marchmain. He’d taken a little palace there, but was he

allowed in? Lord Malton put him and his valet into a dinghy, my dear, and

transshipped him there and then into the steamer for Trieste. He hadn’t even

his mistress with him. It was her yearly holiday. No one ever knew how

they heard Lady Marchmain was there. And, do you know, for a week Lord

Malton slunk about as if he was in disgrace? And he was in disgrace. The

Principessa Fogliere gave a ball and Lord Malton was not asked nor anyone

from his yacht—even the de Pañoses. How does Lady Marchmain do it?

She has convinced the world that Lord Marchmain is a monster. And what

is the truth? They were married for fifteen years or so and then Lord

Marchmain went to the war; he never came back but formed a connection

with a highly talented dancer. There are a thousand such cases. She refuses

to divorce him because she is so pious. Well, there have been cases of that

before. Usually, it arouses sympathy for the adulterer; not for Lord

Marchmain though. You would think that the old reprobate had tortured her,

stolen her patrimony, flung her out of doors, roasted, stuffed, and eaten his

children, and gone frolicking about wreathed in all the flowers of Sodom

and Gomorrah; instead of what? Begetting four splendid children by her,

handing over to her Brideshead and Marchmain House in St. James’s and

all the money she can possibly want to spend, while he sits with a snowy

shirt front at Larue’s with a personable, middle-aged lady of the theatre, in

most conventional Edwardian style. And she meanwhile keeps a small gang

of enslaved and emaciated prisoners for her exclusive enjoyment. She sucks

their blood. You can see the tooth marks all over Adrian Porson’s shoulders

when he is bathing. And he, my dear, was the greatest, the only, poet of our

time. He’s bled dry; there’s nothing left of him. There are five or six others

of all ages and sexes, like wraiths following her around. They never escape

once she’s had her teeth into them. It is witchcraft. There’s no other

explanation.

“当一个人到达父母身边时，一个无底洞就打开了。亲爱的，这样

一对。马奇曼夫人是如何管理的？这是时代的问题之一。你见过她

吗？非常非常漂亮;没有矫揉造作，她的头发只是变成灰色，呈现出优

雅的银色条纹，没有胭脂色，非常苍白，眼睛很大——那双眼睛看起

来有多大，眼睑是蓝色的，这是非同寻常的，其他人会用指尖的油漆

触摸它们;珍珠和一些伟大的星星般的珠宝，传家宝，在古老的环境

中，声音像祈祷一样安静，同样有力。还有马奇曼勋爵，嗯，也许有

点肉，但非常英俊，一个伟大的，一个性感的，拜伦式的，无聊的，

有感染力的懒惰，根本不是你期望看到的那种容易放下的人。而那位

莱因哈特修女，我的挚爱，已经摧毁了他——但完全摧毁了他。他不

敢在任何地方露出他那张紫色的大脸。他是最后一个被赶出社会的、

历史性的、真实的案例。新娘不会见到他，女孩们可能不会见到他，

塞巴斯蒂安当然会见，因为他太迷人了。没有其他人靠近他。为什

么，去年九月，马奇曼夫人在威尼斯住在福格里尔宫。说实话，她在

威尼斯只是有点荒谬。当然，她从来不靠近丽都，但她总是和阿德里

安·波尔森爵士一起乘贡多拉在运河上漂流——亲爱的，这种态度就像

雷卡米耶夫人一样;有一次我经过他们，我引起了福格里尔船夫的注

意，我当然认识他，而且，亲爱的，他给了我这样的眨眼。亲爱的，

她像游丝一样茧般地参加所有聚会，仿佛她是凯尔特人戏剧的一部

分，或者是梅特林克的女主角;她会去教堂。嗯，如你所知，威尼斯是

意大利唯一一个没有人去过教堂的城镇。不管怎么说，那一年她是个

有趣的人物，然后谁应该出现在马尔顿家的游艇上，但可怜的马奇曼

勋爵。他在那里住了一座小宫殿，但他被允许进去吗？亲爱的，马尔

顿勋爵把他和他的男仆放进一艘小艇里，然后把他运到那里，然后装

上开往的里雅斯特的轮船。他甚至没有他的情妇和他在一起。这是她

一年一度的假期。没有人知道他们是怎么听说马奇曼夫人在那里的。

而且，你知道吗，一个星期以来，马尔顿勋爵像丢脸一样四处乱窜？

他很丢脸。福格利尔王子（Principessa Fogliere）开了一个球，马尔顿

勋爵（Lord Malton）没有被问到，他的游艇上也没有任何人被问到，

甚至包括德·帕尼奥斯（de Pañoses）。马奇曼夫人是怎么做到的？她

让世界相信马奇曼勋爵是一个怪物。真相是什么？他们结婚十五年左

右，然后马奇曼勋爵参战了;他再也没有回来，但与一位才华横溢的舞

者建立了联系。有一千个这样的案例。她拒绝和他离婚，因为她太虔

诚了。嗯，以前有过这样的案例。通常，它会引起对通奸者的同情;不

过，马奇曼勋爵却不行。你会认为那个老叛徒折磨了她，偷走了她的

遗产，把她赶出门外，烤、塞、吃他的孩子，然后带着所多玛和蛾摩

拉的花环四处嬉戏;而不是什么？她生了四个漂亮的孩子，把她在圣詹

姆斯的新娘头和马奇曼家以及她可能想花的所有钱都交给了她，而他

则穿着雪白的衬衫坐在拉鲁的剧院里，与一位风度翩翩的中年女士坐

在剧院里，以最传统的爱德华风格。与此同时，她还养了一小群被奴

役和瘦弱的囚犯，供她独家享受。她吮吸他们的血。你可以看到阿德

里安·波尔森（Adrian Porson）洗澡时肩膀上到处都是牙印。他，我的

挚爱，是我们这个时代最伟大、唯一的诗人。他流血干了;他什么都没

有了。还有五六个不同年龄和性别的人，像幽灵一样跟着她。一旦她

咬牙切齿，它们就再也逃不掉了。这是巫术。没有其他解释。

“So you see we mustn’t blame Sebastian if at times he seems a little

insipid—but then you don’t blame him, do you, Charles? With that very

murky background, what could he do except set up as being simple and

charming, particularly as he isn’t very well endowed in the Top Storey. We

couldn’t claim that for him, could we, much as we love him?

“所以你看，我们不能责怪塞巴斯蒂安，如果他有时看起来有点平

淡无奇——但你不要责怪他，是吗，查尔斯？在这种非常阴暗的背景

下，他除了被设定为简单而迷人之外，还能做什么，尤其是因为他在

顶层的天赋不是很好。我们不能为他声称这一点，我们能像我们爱他

一样吗？

“Tell me candidly, have you ever heard Sebastian say anything you have

remembered for five minutes? You know, when I hear him talk, I am

reminded of that in some ways nauseating picture of ‘Bubbles.’

Conversation should be like juggling; up go the balls and the plates, up and

over, in and out, good solid objects that glitter in the foot-lights and fall

with a bang if you miss them. But when dear Sebastian speaks it is like a

little sphere of soapsud drifting off the end of an old clay pipe, anywhere,

full of rainbow light for a second and then—phut! vanished, with nothing

left at all, nothing.”

“坦率地告诉我，你有没有听过塞巴斯蒂安说过你五分钟记得的

话？你知道，当我听到他说话时，我想起了《泡泡》中令人作呕的画

面。谈话应该像杂耍一样;向上走，球和盘子，向上，一遍又一遍，进

进出出，好的固体物体在脚灯下闪闪发光，如果你错过了它们，就会

砰的一声掉下来。但是，当亲爱的塞巴斯蒂安说话时，它就像一个小

小的肥皂球从旧粘土管的末端飘落，在任何地方，一秒钟都充满了彩

虹光，然后——噗！消失了，什么都没有留下，什么都没有。

And then Anthony spoke of the proper experiences of an artist, of the

appreciation and criticism and stimulus he should expect from his friends,

of the hazards he should take in the pursuit of emotion, of one thing and

another while I fell drowsy and let my mind wander a little. So we drove

home, but his words, as we swung over Magdalen Bridge, recalled the

central theme of our dinner. “Well, my dear, I’ve no doubt that first thing

tomorrow you’ll trot round to Sebastian and tell him everything I’ve said

about him. And I will tell you two things; one, that it will not make the

slightest difference to Sebastian’s feeling for me and secondly, my dear—

and I beg you to remember this though I have plainly bored you into a

condition of coma—that he will immediately start talking about that

amusing bear of his. Good night. Sleep innocently.”

然后安东尼谈到了一个艺术家的适当经历，他应该从他的朋友那里

得到的赞赏、批评和刺激，他在追求情感时应该冒的危险，当我昏昏

欲睡时，让我的思绪有点徘徊。于是我们开车回家，但当我们经过马

格达伦桥时，他的话让人想起了我们晚餐的中心主题。“好吧，亲爱

的，我毫不怀疑，明天你会小跑到塞巴斯蒂安身边，告诉他我所说的

关于他的一切。我要告诉你们两件事;第一，这不会对塞巴斯蒂安对我

的感情产生丝毫影响，第二，亲爱的——我恳求你记住这一点，尽管

我显然已经让你感到厌烦昏迷——他会立即开始谈论他的那只有趣的

熊。晚安。天真地睡吧。

But I slept ill. Within an hour of tumbling drowsily to bed I was awake

again, thirsty, restless, hot and cold by turns, and unnaturally excited. I had

drunk a lot, but neither the mixture, nor the Chartreuse, nor the

Mavrodaphne Trifle, nor even the fact that I had sat immobile and almost

silent throughout the evening instead of clearing the fumes, as we normally

did, in puppyish romps and tumbles, explains the distress of that hag-ridden

night. No dream distorted the images of the evening into horrific shapes. I

lay awake and clear-headed. I repeated to myself Anthony’s words, catching

his accent, soundlessly, and the stress and cadence of his speech, while

under my closed lids I saw his pale, candle-lit face as it had fronted me

across the dinner table. Once during the hours of darkness I brought to light

the drawings in my sitting-room and sat at the open window, turning them

over. Everything was black and dead-still in the quadrangle; only at the

quarter-hours the bells awoke and sang over the gables. I drank soda-water

and smoked and fretted, until light began to break and the rustle of a rising

breeze turned me back to my bed.

但我睡得不好。睡眼惺忪地上床睡了不到一个小时，我又醒了，口

渴，坐立不安，忽冷忽热，不自然地兴奋。我喝了很多酒，但无论是

混合物，还是黄绿色，还是马夫罗达芙妮琐事，甚至整个晚上我都一

动不动，几乎一言不发，而不是像往常那样在小狗般的嬉戏和翻滚中

清除烟雾，都无法解释那个憔悴的夜晚的痛苦。没有梦将夜晚的画面

扭曲成可怕的形状。我清醒地躺着，头脑清醒。我自言自语地重复着

安东尼的话，无声地捕捉到他的口音，以及他讲话的重音和节奏，而

在我紧闭的眼睑下，我看到他苍白的、烛光下的脸，就像它对着餐桌

对面的我一样。有一次，在黑暗中，我把客厅里的画拿出来，坐在敞

开的窗户前，把它们翻过来。四合院里的一切都是黑色的，死寂的;只

有在一刻钟时，钟声才醒来，在山墙上唱歌。我喝着苏打水，抽着

烟，烦躁不安，直到天亮了，一阵微风的沙沙声把我带回了床上。

When I awoke Lunt was at the open door. “I let you lie,” he said. “I

didn’t think you’d be going to the Corporate Communion.”

当我醒来时，伦特在敞开的门口。“我让你撒谎，”他说。“我没想

到你会去参加企业圣餐。”

“You were quite right.”

“你说得很对。”

“Most of the freshmen went and quite a few second and third year men.

It’s all on account of the new chaplain. There was never Corporate

Communion before—just Holy Communion for those that wanted it and

Chapel and Evening Chapel.”

“大多数新生都去了，还有不少二年级和三年级的男生。这一切都

归功于新牧师。以前从未有过集体圣餐——只有那些想要它的人的圣

餐，以及礼拜堂和晚间礼拜堂。

It was the last Sunday of term; the last of the year. As I went to my bath,

the quad filled with gowned and surpliced undergraduates drifting from

chapel to hall. As I came back they were standing in groups, smoking;

Jasper had bicycled in from his digs to be among them.

这是学期的最后一个星期天;今年的最后一天。当我去洗澡时，四

边形里挤满了穿着长袍和穿着长袍的本科生，他们从一个教堂漂流到

另一个大厅。当我回来时，他们成群结队地站着抽烟;贾斯珀从他的挖

掘中骑自行车进来，成为他们中的一员。

I walked down the empty Broad to breakfast, as I often did on Sundays,

at a tea-shop opposite Balliol. The air was full of bells from the surrounding

spires and the sun, casting long shadows across the open spaces, dispelled

the fears of night. The tea-shop was hushed as a library; a few solitary men

in bedroom slippers from Balliol and Trinity looked up as I entered, then

turned back to their Sunday newspapers. I ate my scrambled eggs and bitter

marmalade with the zest which in youth follows a restless night. I lit a

cigarette and sat on, while one by one the Balliol and Trinity men paid their

bills and shuffled away, slip-slop, across the street to their colleges. It was

nearly eleven when I left, and during my walk I heard the change-ringing

cease and, all over the town, give place to the single chime which warned

the city that service was about to start.

我像往常一样，沿着空荡荡的布罗德河去巴利奥尔对面的一家茶馆

吃早餐。空气中充满了周围尖顶的钟声，太阳在空旷的空间上投下长

长的阴影，驱散了夜晚的恐惧。茶馆像图书馆一样安静;当我进来时，

几个穿着卧室拖鞋的孤独男人从Balliol和Trinity抬起头来，然后转身看

他们的周日报纸。我吃着炒鸡蛋和苦果酱，热情高涨，在年轻时，这

是一个不安的夜晚。我点燃了一支烟，坐了下来，而巴利奥尔和三一

的男人一个接一个地付了帐单，拖着脚步，溜地走了，穿过马路，回

到了他们的大学。我离开的时候已经快十一点了，在我散步的时候，

我听到更衣铃声停止了，整个城镇都只剩下一声钟声，它警告着城市

服务即将开始。

None but church-goers seemed abroad that morning; undergraduates and

graduates and wives and tradespeople, walking with that unmistakable

English church-going pace which eschewed equally both haste and idle

sauntering; holding, bound in black lamb-skin and white celluloid, the

liturgies of half a dozen conflicting sects; on their way to St. Barnabas, St.

Columba, St. Aloysius, St. Mary’s, Pusey House, Blackfriars, and heaven

knows where besides; to restored Norman and revived Gothic, to travesties

of Venice and Athens; all in the summer sunshine going to the temples of

their race. Four proud infidels alone proclaimed their dissent; four Indians

from the gates of Balliol, in freshly-laundered white flannels and neatly

pressed blazers, with snow-white turbans on their heads, and in their plump,

brown hands bright cushions, a picnic basket and the Plays Unpleasant of

Bernard Shaw, making for the river.

那天早上，除了去教堂的人之外，似乎没有人在国外;本科生、研

究生、妻子和商人，以那种明确无误的英国教堂步伐走着，同样避免

了匆忙和无所事事的闲逛;用黑色羊皮和白色赛璐珞装订着六个相互冲

突的教派的礼仪;在他们前往圣巴拿巴、圣哥伦巴、圣阿洛伊修斯、圣

玛丽、普西之家、黑衣修士的路上，天知道除此之外还有什么;恢复诺

曼底和复兴哥特式，对威尼斯和雅典的嘲讽;所有这些都在夏日的阳光

下前往他们种族的寺庙。仅四个骄傲的异教徒就宣布了他们的异议;四

个印第安人从巴利奥尔的城门口出来，穿着刚洗过的白色法兰绒和整

齐的西装外套，头上戴着雪白的头巾，丰满的棕色手上放着鲜艳的靠

垫，野餐篮和萧伯纳的戏剧，向河边走去。

In the Cornmarket a party of tourists stood on the steps of the Clarendon

Hotel discussing a road map with their chauffeur, while opposite, through

the venerable arch of the Golden Cross, I greeted a group of undergraduates

from my college who had breakfasted there and now lingered with their

pipes in the creeper-hung courtyard. A troop of boy scouts, church-bound,

too, bright with colored ribbons and badges, loped past in unmilitary array,

and at Carfax I met the Mayor and corporation, in scarlet gowns and gold

chains, preceded by wand-bearers and followed by no curious glances, in

procession to the preaching at the City Church. In St. Aldates I passed a

crocodile of choir boys, in starched collars and peculiar caps, on their way

to Tom Gate and the Cathedral. So through a world of piety I made my way

to Sebastian.

在玉米市场，一群游客站在克拉伦登酒店的台阶上，与他们的司机

讨论路线图，而对面，穿过古老的金十字拱门，我向一群来自我大学

的本科生打招呼，他们在那里吃过早餐，现在在爬山虎悬挂的院子里

徘徊着烟斗。一队童子军，也带着教堂，带着彩色的缎带和徽章，以

非军事的阵列从身边掠过，在卡尔法克斯，我遇到了市长和公司，穿

着猩红色的长袍和金链子，前面是拿着魔杖的人，后面没有好奇的目

光，游行到城市教堂的布道。在圣阿尔达特，我经过了一群唱诗班的

男孩，他们戴着上浆的项圈，戴着奇特的帽子，在前往汤姆门和大教

堂的路上。因此，通过一个虔诚的世界，我来到了塞巴斯蒂安。

He was out. I read the letters, none of them very revealing, that littered

his writing table and scrutinized the invitation cards on his chimneypiece—

there were no new additions. Then I read Lady into Fox until he returned.

他出去了。我读了那些散落在他写字台上的信，仔细检查了他烟囱

上的邀请卡，没有新增的内容。然后我读了《狐狸夫人》，直到他回

来。

“I’ve been to mass at the Old Palace,” he said. “I haven’t been all this

term, and Monsignor Bell asked me to dinner twice last week, and I know

what that means. Mummy’s been writing to him. So I sat bang in front

where he couldn’t help seeing me and absolutely shouted the Hail Marys at

the end; so that’s over. How was dinner with Antoine? What did you talk

about?”

“我去过旧宫的弥撒，”他说。“这个学期我还没来过，贝尔主教上

周请我吃了两次晚饭，我知道这意味着什么。妈妈一直在给他写信。

于是我坐在前面，他忍不住看到我，最后绝对喊了一声万岁玛丽;所以

这结束了。和安托万共进晚餐怎么样？你刚才说了什么？

“Well, he did most of the talking. Tell me, did you know him at Eton?”

“嗯，他做了大部分的谈话。告诉我，你在伊顿公学认识他吗？

“He was sacked my first half. I remember seeing him about. He always

has been a noticeable figure.”

“他被解雇了。我记得在附近见过他。他一直是一个引人注目的人

物。

“Did he go to church with you?”

“他和你一起去教堂了吗？”

“I don’t think so, why?”

“我不这么认为，为什么？”

“Has he met any of your family?”

“他见过你的家人吗？”

“Charles, how very peculiar you’re being today. No. I don’t suppose so.”

“查尔斯，你今天真是太奇怪了。不。我不这么认为。

“Not your mother at Venice?”

“不是你母亲在威尼斯吗？”

“I believe she did say something about it. I forget what. I think she was

staying with some Italian cousins of ours, the Foglieres, and Anthony

turned up with his family at the hotel, and there was some party the

Foglieres gave that they weren’t asked to. I know Mummy said something

about it when I told her he was a friend of mine. I can’t think why he should

want to go to a party at the Foglieres—the princess is so proud of her

English blood that she talks of nothing else. Anyway, no one objected to

Antoine—much, I gather. It was his mother they thought difficult.”

“我相信她确实说了些什么。我忘了是什么。我想她和我们的一些

意大利表兄弟住在一起，Foglieres，安东尼和他的家人一起出现在酒

店，Foglieres举办了一些派对，他们没有被要求参加。我知道当我告

诉她他是我的朋友时，妈妈说了些什么。我想不出他为什么要去参加

福格利耶的派对——公主对自己的英国血统感到非常自豪，以至于她

什么也没说。不管怎么说，没有人反对安托万——我收集到了很多。

他们认为很难的是他的母亲。

“And who is the Duchesse of Vincennes?”

“文森斯公爵夫人是谁？”

“Poppy?”

“罂粟？”

“Stefanie.”

“斯蒂芬妮。”

“You must ask Antoine that. He claims to have had an affair with her.”

“你必须问安托万。他声称和她有染。

“Did he?”

“是吗？”

“I dare say. I think it’s more or less compulsory at Cannes. Why all this

interest?”

“我敢说。我认为这在戛纳电影节上或多或少是强制性的。为什么

这么感兴趣？

“I just wanted to find out how much truth there was in what Anthony

said last night.”

“我只是想知道安东尼昨晚说的话有多少道理。

“I shouldn’t think a word. That’s his great charm.”

“我不应该想一个字。这就是他的魅力所在。

“You may think it charming. I think it’s devilish. Do you know he spent

the whole of yesterday evening trying to turn me against you, and almost

succeeded?”

“你可能会觉得它很迷人。我认为这是恶魔般的。你知道吗，他昨

天晚上一整天都想让我反对你，而且差点得逞？

“Did he? How silly. Aloysius wouldn’t approve of that at all, would you,

you pompous old bear?”

“是吗？真傻。阿洛伊修斯根本不会同意的，你，你这个自负的老

熊吗？

And then Boy Mulcaster came into the room.

然后Boy Mulcaster走进了房间。

Three

三

I returned home for the Long Vacation without plans and without money.

To cover end-of-term expenses I had sold my Omega screen to Collins for

ten pounds, of which I now kept four; my last check overdrew my account

by a few shillings, and I had been told that, without my father’s authority, I

must draw no more. My next allowance was not due until October. I was

thus faced with a bleak prospect and, turning the matter over in my mind, I

felt something not far off remorse for the prodigality of the preceding

weeks.

我回家过长假，没有计划，也没有钱。为了支付期末费用，我以十英

镑的价格将我的欧米茄屏幕卖给了柯林斯，现在我保留了四英镑;我最

后的支票透支了几先令，有人告诉我，没有我父亲的授权，我不能再

提钱了。我的下一笔津贴要到10月才到期。因此，我面临着一个黯淡

的前景，在我的脑海中翻来覆去，我对前几周的浪子感到不远的悔

恨。

I had started the term with my battels paid and over a hundred pounds in

hand. All that had gone, and not a penny paid out where I could get credit.

There had been no reason for it, no great pleasure unattainable else; it had

gone in ducks and drakes. Sebastian used to tease me—“You spend money

like a bookie”—but all of it went on and with him. His own finances were

perpetually, vaguely distressed. “It’s all done by lawyers,” he said

helplessly, “and I suppose they embezzle a lot. Anyway, I never seem to get

much. Of course, mummy would give me anything I asked for.”

我开始了这个学期，我的巴特尔付了钱，手里拿着一百多英镑。所

有这一切都消失了，没有一分钱支付给我可以获得信贷的地方。没有

理由这样做，没有别处无法获得的巨大快乐;它已经变成了鸭子和龙。

塞巴斯蒂安曾经取笑我——“你像个赌徒一样花钱”——但这一切都在

继续，而且和他在一起。他自己的财务状况一直很痛苦，隐隐约约地

陷入困境。“这都是律师干的，”他无奈地说，“我想他们挪用了很多公

款。无论如何，我似乎从来没有得到太多。当然，妈妈会给我任何我

想要的东西。

“Then why don’t you ask her for a proper allowance?”

“那你为什么不向她索要适当的零花钱呢？”

“Oh, mummy likes everything to be a present. She’s so sweet,” he said,

adding one more line to the picture I was forming of her.

“噢，妈妈喜欢把所有东西都当成礼物。她太可爱了，“他说，在我

为她形成的照片上又加了一行。

Now Sebastian had disappeared into that other life of his where I was

not asked to follow, and I was left, instead, forlorn and regretful.

现在塞巴斯蒂安已经消失在他另一个生命中，我没有被要求跟随，

相反，我只剩下孤独和遗憾。

How ungenerously in later life we disclaim the virtuous moods of our

youth, living in retrospect long, summer days of unreflecting dissipation.

There is no candor in a story of early manhood which leaves out of account

the home-sickness for nursery morality, the regrets and resolutions of

amendment, the black hours which, like zero on the roulette table, turn up

with roughly calculable regularity.

在以后的生活中，我们多么慷慨地否认我们年轻时的善良情绪，生

活在回想起漫长的夏日里，没有反思的消散。在一个关于早期男子气

概的故事中，没有坦率，它没有考虑到对托儿所道德的思乡之情，对

修正的遗憾和决心，以及像轮盘赌桌上的零一样的黑色时间，以大致

可以计算的规律出现。

Thus I spent the first afternoon at home, wandering from room to room,

looking from the plate-glass windows in turn on the garden and the street,

in a mood of vehement self-reproach.

就这样，我在家里度过了第一个下午，从一个房间到另一个房间徘

徊，从平板玻璃窗依次看着花园和街道，心情是强烈的自责。

My father, I knew, was in the house, but his library was inviolable, and it

was not until just before dinner that he appeared to greet me. He was then in

his late fifties, but it was his idiosyncrasy to seem much older than his

years; to see him one might have put him at seventy, to hear him speak at

nearly eighty. He came to me now, with the shuffling, mandarin-tread which

he affected, and a shy smile of welcome. When he dined at home—and he

seldom dined elsewhere—he wore a frogged velvet smoking suit of the kind

which had been fashionable many years before and was to be so again, but,

at that time, was a deliberate archaism.

我知道，我父亲在屋子里，但他的图书馆是不可侵犯的，直到晚饭

前，他才出现向我打招呼。那时他已经五十多岁了，但他的特质是看

起来比实际年龄大得多。要见到他，人们可能会把他放在七十岁，听

他说话时将近八十岁。他现在来找我了，带着他影响的拖曳，柑橘般

的步伐，以及欢迎的羞涩微笑。当他在家里吃饭时——他很少在其他

地方吃饭——他穿着一件褶皱的天鹅绒吸烟服，这种西装在很多年前

就很流行，现在也会很时髦，但在当时，这是一种刻意的过时主义。

“My dear boy, they never told me you were here. Did you have a very

exhausting journey? They gave you tea? You are well? I have just made a

somewhat audacious purchase from Sonerscheins—a terra-cotta bull of the

fifth century. I was examining it and forgot your arrival. Was the carriage

very full? You had a corner seat?” (He travelled so rarely himself that to

hear of others doing so always excited his solicitude.) “Hayter brought you

the evening paper? There is no news, of course—such a lot of nonsense.”

“我亲爱的孩子，他们从来没有告诉我你在这里。你有没有一个非

常疲惫的旅程？他们给你喝茶？你还好吗？我刚刚从Sonerscheins那里

买了一头五世纪的陶牛，有点大胆。我正在检查它，忘记了你的到

来。马车很满吗？你有角落座位吗？（他自己很少旅行，以至于听到

别人这样做总是让他的关怀感到兴奋。“海特给你带来了晚报？当然，

没有消息——这么多废话。

Dinner was announced. My father from long habit took a book with him

to the table and then, remembering my presence, furtively dropped it under

his chair. “What do you like to drink? Hayter, what have we for Mr. Charles

to drink?”

晚宴宣布了。我父亲从长久以来的习惯中，把一本书带到桌子上，

然后，想起我的存在，偷偷地把它放在椅子下面。“你喜欢喝什么？海

特，我们给查尔斯先生喝什么？

“There’s some whisky.”

“来点威士忌。”

“There’s whisky. Perhaps you like something else? What else have we?”

“有威士忌。也许你喜欢别的东西？我们还有什么？

“There isn’t anything else in the house, sir.”

“屋子里没有别的东西了，先生。”

“There’s nothing else. You must tell Hayter what you would like and he

will get it in. I never keep any wine now. I am forbidden it and no one

comes to see me. But while you are here, you must have what you like. You

are here for long?”

“没有别的了。你必须告诉海特你想要什么，他会得到的。我现在

从来不养酒。我被禁止，没有人来看我。但是当你在这里时，你必须

拥有你喜欢的东西。你在这里待久了？

“I’m not quite sure, father.”

“我不太确定，父亲。”

“It’s a very long vacation,” he said wistfully. “In my day we used to go

on what were called reading parties, always in mountainous areas. Why?

Why,” he repeated petulantly, “should alpine scenery be thought conducive

to study?”

“这是一个非常漫长的假期，”他满怀憧憬地说。“在我那个时代，

我们经常参加所谓的读书会，总是在山区。为什么？为什么，“他烦躁

地重复了一遍，”阿尔卑斯山的风景应该被认为有利于研究呢？

“I thought of putting in some time at an art school—in the life class.”

“我想花一些时间在艺术学校——在生活课上。”

“My dear boy, you’ll find them all shut. The students go to Barbizon or

such places and paint in the open air. There was an institution in my day

called a “sketching club”—mixed sexes’ (snuffle), “bicycles’ (snuffle),

“pepper-and-salt knickerbockers, holland umbrellas, and, it was popularly

thought, free love’ (snuffle), “such a lot of nonsense. I expect they still go

on. You might try that.”

“我亲爱的孩子，你会发现他们都关上了。学生们去巴比松或这样

的地方，在露天画画。在我那个时代，有一个叫做“素描俱乐部”的机

构——男女混血儿（snuffle）、“自行车”（snuffle）、“胡椒盐短裤、

荷兰雨伞，以及人们普遍认为的自由恋爱”（snuffle），“这么多废

话。我希望他们仍然会继续下去。你可以试试。

“One of the problems of the vacation is money, father.”

“假期的问题之一是钱，父亲。”

“Oh, I shouldn’t worry about a thing like that at your age.”

“哦，在你这个年纪，我不应该担心这样的事情。”

“You see, I’ve run rather short.”

“你看，我跑得很短。”

“Yes?” said my father without any sound of interest.

“是吗？”我父亲说，没有任何兴趣。

“In fact I don’t quite know how I’m going to get through the next two

months.”

“事实上，我不太清楚接下来的两个月我该如何度过。

“Well, I’m the worst person to come to for advice. I’ve never been

“short” as you so painfully call it. And yet what else could you say? Hard

up? Penurious? Distressed? Embarrassed? Stony-broke?” (snuffle). “On the

rocks? In Queer Street? Let us say you are in Queer Street and leave it at

that. Your grandfather once said to me, “Live within your means, but if you

do get into difficulties, come to me. Don’t go to the Jews.” Such a lot of

nonsense. You try. Go to those gentlemen in Jermyn Street who offer

advances on note of hand only. My dear boy, they won’t give you a

sovereign.”

“好吧，我是最糟糕的人来寻求建议。我从来没有像你痛苦地称呼

的那样“矮”。然而，你还能说什么呢？难吗？穷困潦倒？心疼？尴

尬？石块破了？（鼻烟）。“在岩石上？在酷儿街？假设你在酷儿街，

就这样吧。你爷爷曾经对我说过：“量入为出，但如果你遇到困难，就

来找我。不要去找犹太人。这么多废话。你试试。去找杰明街的那些

绅士们，他们只提供预付款。我亲爱的孩子，他们不会给你一个主

权。

“Then what do you suggest my doing?”

“那你建议我怎么做？”

“Your cousin Melchior was imprudent with his investments and got into

a very queer street. He went to Australia.”

“你的表弟梅尔基奥尔对他的投资很轻率，进入了一条非常奇怪的

街道。他去了澳大利亚。

I had not seen my father so gleeful since he found two pages of second-

century papyrus between the leaves of a Lombardic breviary.

我从未见过我父亲如此高兴，因为他在伦巴第短篇小说的叶子之间

发现了两页二世纪的纸莎草纸。

“Hayter, I’ve dropped my book.”

“海特，我把书丢了。”

It was recovered for him from under his feet and propped against the

épergne. For the rest of dinner he was silent save for an occasional snuffle

of merriment which could not, I thought, be provoked by the work he read.

它从他的脚下为他找回，并支撑在épergne上。在剩下的晚餐时间

里，他一言不发，除了偶尔的一阵欢呼，我想，这不可能是他读的作

品所激起的。

Presently we left the table and sat in the garden-room; and there, plainly,

he put me out of his mind; his thoughts, I knew, were far away, in those

distant ages where he moved at ease, where time passed in centuries and all

the figures were defaced and the names of his companions were corrupt

readings of words of quite other meaning. He sat in an attitude which to

anyone else would have been one of extreme discomfort, askew in his

upright armchair, with his book held high and obliquely to the light. Now

and then he took a gold pencil-case from his watch-chain and made an entry

in the margin. The windows were open to the summer night; the ticking of

the clocks, the distant murmur of traffic on the Bayswater Road, and my

father’s regular turning of the pages were the only sounds. I had thought it

impolitic to smoke a cigar while pleading poverty; now in desperation I

went to my room and fetched one. My father did not look up. I pierced it, lit

it, and with renewed confidence said, “Father, you surely don’t want me to

spend the whole vacation here with you?”

现在，我们离开了桌子，坐在花园的房间里。在那里，很明显，他

把我从他的脑海中抛在脑后;我知道，他的思想是遥远的，在那些遥远

的时代，他自在地移动，时间在几个世纪中流逝，所有的人物都被污

损了，他的同伴的名字都是对完全不同含义的词语的腐败解读。他以

一种对其他人来说会极度不舒服的姿态坐着，歪斜地坐在他直立的扶

手椅上，他的书高高地、斜着对着灯光。他时不时地从表链上拿出一

个金铅笔盒，在空白处做一个条目。窗户向夏夜敞开;时钟的滴答声，

贝斯沃特路上遥远的交通杂音，以及我父亲定期翻页的声音是唯一的

声音。我曾以为一边抽雪茄一边恳求贫穷是不礼貌的;现在在绝望中，

我回到我的房间拿了一个。我父亲没有抬头。我刺穿了它，点燃了

它，然后重新自信地说：“父亲，你肯定不想让我在这里和你一起度过

整个假期吗？

“Eh?”

“嗯？”

“Won’t you find it rather a bore having me at home for so long?”

“你不觉得我在家里呆了这么久很无聊吗？”

“I trust I should not betray such an emotion even if I felt it,” said my

father mildly and turned back to his book.

“我相信我不应该背叛这种情感，即使我感觉到它，”我父亲温和地

说，然后转身回到他的书上。

The evening passed. Eventually all over the room clocks of diverse

pattern musically chimed eleven. My father closed his book and removed

his spectacles. “You are very welcome, my dear boy,” he said. “Stay as long

as you find it convenient.” At the door he paused and turned back. “Your

cousin Melchior worked his passage to Australia before the mast.”

(Snuffle.) “What, I wonder, is ‘before the mast’?”

晚上过去了。最终，整个房间的时钟在音乐中响起了十一点。我父

亲合上书，摘下眼镜。“不客气，我亲爱的孩子，”他说。“只要你觉得

方便就住。”在门口，他停了下来，转过身来。“你的表弟梅尔基奥尔

在桅杆之前就完成了前往澳大利亚的通道。”（鼻烟。“我想知道，'桅

杆前'是什么？”

During the sultry week that followed, my relations with my father

deteriorated sharply. I saw little of him during the day; he spent hours on

end in the library; now and then he emerged and I would hear him calling

over the banisters: “Hayter, get me a cab.” Then he would be away,

sometimes for half an hour or less, sometimes for a whole day; his errands

were never explained. Often I saw trays going up to him at odd hours, laden

with meager nursery snacks—rusks, glasses of milk, bananas and so forth.

If we met in a passage or on the stairs he would look at me vacantly and say

‘Ah-ha,” or ‘Very warm,” or ‘Splendid, splendid,” but in the evening, when

he came to the garden-room in his velvet smoking suit, he always greeted

me formally.

在随后的闷热的一周里，我和父亲的关系急剧恶化。白天我很少见到

他;他在图书馆里连续呆了几个小时;他时不时地出现，我会听到他在

栏杆上喊道：“海特，给我打车。然后他会离开，有时半小时或更短，

有时一整天;他的差事从未得到解释。我经常在奇怪的时间看到托盘走

到他面前，里面装满了微薄的托儿所零食——面包干、牛奶杯、香蕉

等等。如果我们在过道或楼梯上相遇，他会茫然地看着我，说'啊哈'，

或者'很温暖'，或者'太棒了，太棒了'，但是到了晚上，当他穿着天鹅

绒烟熏服来到花园房间时，他总是很正式地向我打招呼。

The dinner table was our battlefield.

餐桌是我们的战场。

On the second evening I took my book with me to the dining-room. His

mild and wandering eye fastened on it with sudden attention, and as we

passed through the hall he surreptitiously left his own on a side table. When

we sat down, he said plaintively: “I do think, Charles, you might talk to me.

I’ve had a very exhausting day. I was looking forward to a little

conversation.”

第二天晚上，我带着书去了餐厅。他那双温和而游移的眼睛突然被

它盯住了，当我们穿过大厅时，他偷偷地把自己的眼睛放在了旁边的

桌子上。当我们坐下时，他平淡地说：“我确实认为，查尔斯，你可以

和我谈谈。我度过了非常疲惫的一天。我很期待和我们聊一会儿。

“Of course, father. What shall we talk about?”

“当然，父亲。我们该谈什么呢？

“Cheer me up. Take me out of myself,” petulantly, “tell me all about the

new plays.”

“让我振作起来。把我从我自己身上拿出来，“任性地说，”告诉我

所有关于新剧的事情。

“But I haven’t been to any.”

“但我什么都没去过。”

“You should, you know, you really should. It’s not natural in a young

man to spend all his evenings at home.”

“你应该，你知道，你真的应该。对于一个年轻人来说，所有的夜

晚都呆在家里是不自然的。

“Well, father, as I told you, I haven’t much money to spare for theatre-

going.”

“好吧，父亲，我跟你说过，我没有多少钱可以去剧院看戏。

“My dear boy, you must not let money become your master in this way.

Why, at your age, your cousin Melchior was part-owner of a musical piece.

It was one of his few happy ventures. You should go to the play as part of

your education. If you read the lives of eminent men you will find that quite

half of them made their first acquaintance with drama from the gallery. I am

told there is no pleasure like it. It is there that you find the real critics and

devotees. It is called “sitting with the gods”. The expense is nugatory, and

even while you wait for admission in the street you are diverted by

“buskers”. We will sit with the gods together one night. How do you find

Mrs. Abel’s cooking?”

“我亲爱的孩子，你不能让金钱以这种方式成为你的主人。为什

么，在你这个年纪，你的表弟梅尔基奥尔是一首音乐作品的部分所有

者。这是他为数不多的快乐冒险之一。你应该去看戏作为你教育的一

部分。如果你读过杰出人物的生活，你会发现他们中有相当一半的人

是从画廊里第一次认识戏剧的。有人告诉我，没有比这更快乐的了。

在那里，您可以找到真正的批评家和奉献者。它被称为“与神坐在一

起”。费用是微不足道的，即使你在街上等待入场，你也会被“街头艺

人”转移注意力。有一天晚上，我们将与众神坐在一起。你怎么找到亚

伯太太的厨艺？

“Unchanged.”

“不变。”

“It was inspired by your Aunt Philippa. She gave Mrs. Abel ten menus,

and they have never been varied. When I am alone I do not notice what I

eat, but now that you are here, we must have a change. What would you

like? What is in season? Are you fond of lobsters? Hayter, tell Mrs. Abel to

give us lobsters tomorrow night.”

“它的灵感来自你的菲利帕阿姨。她给了亚伯太太十份菜单，而且

从来没换过。当我独自一人时，我不会注意到我吃什么，但现在你在

这里，我们必须有所改变。你想要什么？什么是季节？你喜欢龙虾

吗？海特，告诉亚伯太太明天晚上给我们龙虾。

Dinner that evening consisted of a white, tasteless soup, over-fried fillets

of sole with a pink sauce, lamb cutlets propped against a cone of mashed

potato, stewed pears in jelly standing on a kind of sponge cake.

那天晚上的晚餐包括白汤，无味的白汤，粉红色酱汁的炸鳎鱼片，

羊排靠在土豆泥的圆锥体上，果冻炖梨放在海绵蛋糕上。

“It is purely out of respect for your Aunt Philippa that I dine at this

length. She laid it down that a three-course dinner was middle-class. “If you

once let the servants get their way,” she said, “you will find yourself dining

nightly off a single chop.” There is nothing I should like more. In fact, that

is exactly what I do when I go to my club on Mrs. Abel’s evening out. But

your aunt ordained that at home I must have soup and three courses; some

nights it is fish, meat, and savory, on others it is meat, sweet, savory—there

are a number of possible permutations.

“纯粹是出于对你菲利帕阿姨的尊重，我吃了这么长时间。她规

定，三道菜的晚餐是中产阶级的。“如果你曾经让仆人得逞，”她说，

“你会发现自己每晚都在吃一顿饭。没有什么比这更值得我期待的了。

事实上，这正是我在亚伯夫人晚上外出时去俱乐部时所做的。可是你

姨妈吩咐我在家里一定要有汤和三道菜;有些晚上是鱼、肉和咸味，有

时是肉、甜、咸——有许多可能的排列。

“It is remarkable how some people are able to put their opinions in

lapidary form; your aunt had that gift.

“值得注意的是，有些人能够以宝石形式表达他们的意见;你姨妈有

这个天赋。

“It is odd to think that she and I once dined together nightly—just as you

and I do, my boy. Now she made unremitting efforts to take me out of

myself. She used to tell me about her reading. It was in her mind to make a

home with me, you know. She thought I should get into funny ways if I was

left on my own. Perhaps I have got into funny ways. Have I? But it didn’t

do. I got her out in the end.”

“想到她和我曾经每晚一起吃饭，真是奇怪——就像你和我一样，

我的孩子。现在她不懈地努力把我从自己身上带出来。她曾经告诉我

她的阅读情况。她的想法是和我一起安家，你知道的。她认为如果我

独自一人，我应该变得有趣。也许我陷入了有趣的方式。我有吗？但

事实并非如此。最后我把她救了出来。

There was an unmistakable note of menace in his voice as he said this.

说这话时，他的声音里有一种明显的威胁。

It was largely by reason of my Aunt Philippa that I now found myself so

much a stranger in my father’s house. After my mother’s death she came to

live with my father and me, no doubt, as he said, with the idea of making

her home with us. I knew nothing, then, of the nightly agonies at the dinner

table. My aunt made herself my companion, and I accepted her without

question. That was for a year. The first change was that she reopened her

house in Surrey which she had meant to sell, and lived there during my

school terms, coming to London only for a few days’ shopping and

entertainment. In the summer we went to lodgings together at the seaside.

Then in my last year at school she left England. “I got her out in the end,”

he said with derision and triumph of that kindly lady, and he knew that I

heard in the words a challenge to myself.

很大程度上是因为我的菲利帕姨妈，我现在发现自己在我父亲的家

里是一个陌生人。在我母亲去世后，她来到我父亲和我家，毫无疑

问，正如他所说，她想让她和我们一起回家。那时，我对饭桌上每晚

的痛苦一无所知。我的姨妈把自己当作我的伴侣，我毫不犹豫地接受

了她。那是一年。第一个变化是，她重新开了她在萨里的房子，她本

来打算卖掉的，在我上学期间住在那里，来伦敦只是为了购物和娱乐

几天。夏天，我们一起去海边住。然后在我上学的最后一年，她离开

了英国。“我最后把她弄出来了，”他嘲笑和得意洋洋地说，那位善良

的女士，他知道我从这句话中听到了对自己的挑战。

As we left the dining-room my father said, “Hayter, have you yet said

anything to Mrs. Abel about the lobsters I ordered for tomorrow?”

当我们离开餐厅时，我父亲说：“海特，你有没有对亚伯太太说过

我明天点的龙虾？”

“No, sir.”

“不，先生。”

“Do not do so.”

“不要这样做。”

“Very good, sir.”

“很好，先生。”

And when we reached our chairs in the garden-room he said:

当我们走到花园房间的椅子上时，他说：

“I wonder whether Hayter had any intention of mentioning lobsters. I

rather think not. Do you know, I believe he thought I was joking?”

“我想知道海特是否打算提到龙虾。我宁愿不这么认为。你知道

吗，我相信他以为我在开玩笑？

Next day, by chance, a weapon came to hand. I met an old acquaintance

of school-days, a contemporary of mine named Jorkins. I never had much

liking for Jorkins. Once, in my Aunt Philippa’s day, he had come to tea, and

she had condemned him as being probably charming at heart, but

unattractive at first sight. Now I greeted him with enthusiasm and asked

him to dinner. He came and showed little alteration. My father must have

been warned by Hayter that there was a guest, for instead of his velvet suit

he wore a tail coat; this, with a black waistcoat, very high collar, and very

narrow white tie, was his evening dress; he wore it with an air of

melancholy as though it were court mourning, which he had assumed in

early youth and, finding the style sympathetic, had retained. He never

possessed a dinner jacket.

第二天，一个偶然的机会，一把武器到了手。我遇到了一个学生时

代的老熟人，一个和我同时代的人，名叫乔金斯。我从来都不太喜欢

乔金斯。有一次，在我姨妈菲利帕的日子里，他来喝茶，她谴责他可

能内心迷人，但一见钟情。现在我热情地向他打招呼，并请他吃饭。

他来了，几乎没有什么变化。我父亲一定是被海特警告过有客人的，

因为他穿的不是天鹅绒西装，而是燕尾服;这件黑色背心，高领子，白

色领带很窄，是他的晚礼服;他带着一种忧郁的气息穿着它，仿佛这是

宫廷的哀悼，这是他在年轻时就认为的，并且发现这种风格令人同

情，因此保留了这种风格。他从来没有一件晚礼服。

“Good evening, good evening. So nice of you to come all this way.”

“晚上好，晚上好。你真好，一路走来。

“Oh, it wasn’t far,” said Jorkins, who lived in Sussex Square.

“哦，不远，”住在苏塞克斯广场的乔金斯说。

“Science annihilates distance,” said my father disconcertingly. “You are

over here on business?”

“科学消灭了距离，”我父亲不安地说。“你是来出差的？”

“Well, I’m in business, if that’s what you mean.”

“好吧，我是做生意的，如果你是这个意思的话。”

“I had a cousin who was in business—you wouldn’t know him; it was

before your time. I was telling Charles about him only the other night. He

has been much in my mind. He came,” my father paused to give full weight

to the bizarre word—“a cropper.”

“我有一个表弟在做生意——你不会认识他;那是在你的时代之前。

就在那天晚上，我才告诉查尔斯关于他的事情。他一直在我的脑海

中。他来了，“我父亲停顿了一下，把这个奇怪的词——”一个庄稼人

“放在了充分的口吻上。

Jorkins giggled nervously. My father fixed him with a look of reproach.

乔金斯紧张地咯咯笑着。我父亲用责备的表情盯着他。

“You find his misfortune the subject of mirth? Or perhaps the word I

used was unfamiliar; you no doubt would say that he “folded up”.”

“你觉得他的不幸是欢乐的主题吗？或者也许我用的词不熟悉;你肯

定会说他“折叠起来”了。

My father was master of the situation. He had made a little fantasy for

himself, that Jorkins should be an American, and throughout the evening he

played a delicate, one-sided parlor-game with him, explaining any

peculiarly English terms that occurred in the conversation, translating

pounds into dollars, and courteously deferring to him with such phrases as

‘Of course, by your standards…”; “All this must seem very parochial to Mr.

Jorkins”; “In the vast spaces to which you are accustomed…” so that my

guest was left with the vague sense that there was a misconception

somewhere as to his identity, which he never got the chance of explaining.

Again and again during dinner he sought my father’s eye, thinking to read

there the simple statement that this form of address was an elaborate joke,

but met instead a look of such mild benignity that he was left baffled.

我父亲是局势的主人。他给自己做了一个小小的幻想，认为乔金斯

应该是美国人，整个晚上，他和他玩了一个微妙的、一边倒的客厅游

戏，解释谈话中出现的任何奇怪的英语术语，将英镑翻译成美元，并

礼貌地用诸如“当然，按照你的标准......”之类的短语来恭敬他;“这一切

在乔金斯先生看来一定是非常狭隘的”;“在你习惯的广阔空间里......”因

此，我的客人有一种模糊的感觉，即对他的身份存在误解，而他从来

没有机会解释。吃晚饭时，他一次又一次地找我父亲的眼睛，想从那

里读到那句简单的声明，说这种形式的称呼是一个精心设计的笑话，

但得到的却是温和的善意的表情，使他感到困惑。

Once I thought my father had gone too far, when he said: “I am afraid

that, living in London, you must sadly miss your national game.”

有一次，我以为父亲做得太过分了，他说：“恐怕，住在伦敦，你

一定很遗憾地错过了你的国家队比赛。

“My national game?” asked Jorkins, slow in the uptake, but scenting that

here, at last, was the opportunity for clearing the matter up.

“我的国赛？”乔金斯问道，他接受得很慢，但嗅到这里终于有了解

决问题的机会。

My father glanced from him to me and his expression changed from

kindness to malice; then back to kindness again as he turned once more to

Jorkins. It was the look of a gambler who lays down fours against a full

house. “Your national game,” he said gently, “cricket,” and he snuffled

uncontrollably, shaking all over and wiping his eyes with his napkin.

“Surely, working in the City, you find your time on the cricket-field greatly

curtailed?”

我父亲从他身上瞥了我一眼，他的表情从善良变成了恶意;然后又

恢复了善良，他再次转向乔金斯。这是一个赌徒的样子，他躺在满屋

子的四边。“你的国球，”他温柔地说，“板球，”他无法控制地抽了抽

鼻子，浑身颤抖，用餐巾擦了擦眼睛。“当然，在城市工作，你发现你

在板球场上的时间大大减少了？”

At the door of the dining-room he left us. “Good night, Mr. Jorkins,” he

said. “I hope you will pay us another visit when you next ‘cross the herring

pond.’ ”

在餐厅门口，他离开了我们。“晚安，乔金斯先生，”他说。“我希

望你下次'穿越鲱鱼池'时能再来拜访我们。"

“I say, what did your governor mean by that? He seemed almost to think

I was American.”

“我说，你们州长这话是什么意思？他似乎几乎以为我是美国人。

“He’s rather odd at times.”

“他有时很奇怪。”

“I mean all that about advising me to visit Westminster Abbey. It

seemed rum.”

“我的意思是建议我去威斯敏斯特教堂。似乎是朗姆酒。

“Yes. I can’t quite explain.”

“是的。我不太清楚。

“I almost thought he was pulling my leg,” said Jorkins in puzzled tones.

“我几乎以为他在拉我的腿，”乔金斯用困惑的语气说。

My father’s counter-attack was delivered a few days later. He sought me out

and said, “Mr. Jorkins is still here?”

几天后，我父亲的反击被送达了。他找到我说：“乔金斯先生还在这里

吗？

“No, father, of course not. He only came to dinner.”

“不，父亲，当然不是。他只是来吃晚饭的。

“Oh, I hoped he was staying with us. Such a versatile young man. But

you will be dining in?”

“哦，我希望他能和我们在一起。这样一个多才多艺的年轻人。但

是你会在里面吃饭吗？

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“I am giving a little dinner party to diversify the rather monotonous

series of your evenings at home. You think Mrs. Abel is up to it? No. But

our guests are not exacting. Sir Cuthbert and Lady Orme-Herrick are what

might be called the nucleus. I hope for a little music afterwards. I have

included in the invitations some young people for you.”

“我正在举办一个小型晚宴，以丰富你在家中相当单调的夜晚。你

认为亚伯夫人能胜任吗？不。但是我们的客人并不严格。卡斯伯特爵

士和奥姆-赫里克夫人可以称为核心。我希望之后能有一点音乐。我在

邀请函中包括了一些年轻人。

My presentiments of my father’s plan were surpassed by the actuality.

As the guests assembled in the room which my father, without self-

consciousness, called ‘the Gallery,” it was plain to me that they had been

carefully chosen for my discomfort. The ‘young people’ were Miss Gloria

Orme-Herrick, a student of the ’cello; her fiancé, a bald young man from

the British Museum; and a monoglot Munich publisher. I saw my father

snuffling at me from behind a case of ceramics as he stood with them. That

evening he wore, like a chivalric badge of battle, a small red rose in his

button-hole.

我对父亲计划的预感被现实所超越。当客人聚集在我父亲没有自我

意识地称为“画廊”的房间里时，我清楚地知道他们是精心挑选的，以

缓解我的不适。“年轻人”是格洛丽亚·奥姆-赫里克小姐，她是“大提琴”

的学生;她的未婚夫，一个来自大英博物馆的秃头年轻人;和一家单一

的慕尼黑出版商。我看到我父亲站在一箱陶瓷后面对我嗤之以鼻。那

天晚上，他像骑士战斗的徽章一样，在他的纽扣孔里戴着一朵小红玫

瑰。

Dinner was long and chosen, like the guests, in a spirit of careful

mockery. It was not of Aunt Philippa’s choosing, but had been

reconstructed from a much earlier period, long before he was of an age to

dine downstairs. The dishes were ornamental in appearance and regularly

alternated in color between red and white. They and the wine were equally

tasteless. After dinner my father led the German publisher to the piano and

then, while he played, left the drawing-room to show Sir Cuthbert Orme-

Herrick the Etruscan bull in the gallery.

晚餐很长，像客人一样，本着小心翼翼的嘲弄精神选择。它不是菲

利帕姨妈选择的，而是从更早的时期重建的，早在他到了在楼下吃饭

的年龄之前。这些菜肴在外观上具有装饰性，颜色经常在红色和白色

之间交替。他们和酒同样无味。晚饭后，我父亲领着这位德国出版商

去弹钢琴，然后一边弹奏一边离开客厅，向画廊里的伊特鲁里亚公牛

卡斯伯特·奥姆-赫里克爵士展示。

It was a gruesome evening, and I was astonished to find, when at last the

party broke up, that it was only a few minutes after eleven. My father

helped himself to a glass of barley-water and said: “What very dull friends I

have! You know, without the spur of your presence I should never have

roused myself to invite them. I have been very negligent about entertaining

lately. Now that you are paying me such a long visit, I will have many such

evenings. You liked Miss Gloria Orme-Herrick?”

那是一个令人毛骨悚然的夜晚，我惊讶地发现，当派对终于散去

时，才十一点过后几分钟。我父亲帮自己喝了一杯大麦水，说：“我有

多么无聊的朋友啊！你知道，如果没有你在场的刺激，我永远不应该

醒来邀请他们。我最近在娱乐方面非常疏忽。既然你来拜访我这么

久，我会有很多这样的夜晚。你喜欢格洛丽亚·奥姆-赫里克小姐吗？

“No.”

“没有。”

“No? Was it her little moustache you objected to or her very large feet?

Do you think she enjoyed herself?”

“不是吗？是你反对她的小胡子还是她的大脚？你觉得她喜欢自己

吗？

“No.”

“没有。”

“That was my impression also. I doubt if any of our guests will count

this as one of their happiest evenings. That young foreigner played

atrociously, I thought. Where can I have met him? And Miss Constantia

Smethwick—where can I have met her? But the obligations of hospitality

must be observed. As long as you are here, you shall not be dull.”

“这也是我的印象。我怀疑我们的客人是否会认为这是他们最快乐

的夜晚之一。那个年轻的外国人玩得很残暴，我想。我在哪里能见到

他？还有康斯坦蒂娅·斯梅特威克小姐——我到哪里去见她呢？但必须

遵守热情好客的义务。只要你在这里，你就不会沉闷。

Strife was internecine during the next fortnight, but I suffered the more,

for my father had greater reserves to draw on and a wider territory for

maneuver, while I was pinned to my bridgehead between the uplands and

the sea. He never declared his war aims, and I do not to this day know

whether they were purely punitive—whether he had really at the back of his

mind some geopolitical idea of getting me out of the country, as my Aunt

Philippa had been driven to Bordighera and cousin Melchior to Darwin, or

whether, as seems most likely, he fought for the sheer love of a battle in

which indeed he shone.

在接下来的两周里，冲突是自相残杀的，但我遭受的痛苦更大，因

为我父亲有更多的储备可以动用，有更广阔的领土可以回旋，而我则

被钉在高地和大海之间的桥头堡上。他从未宣布过他的战争目标，直

到今天，我也不知道这些目标是否纯粹是惩罚性的——他是否真的在

脑海里有一些地缘政治的想法，要把我赶出这个国家，就像我的菲利

帕姨妈被赶到博尔迪盖拉，表弟梅尔基奥尔被赶到达尔文一样，或

者，似乎最有可能的是，他为纯粹的热爱而战，在这场战斗中他确实

闪耀着光芒。

I received one letter from Sebastian, a conspicuous object which was

brought to me in my father’s presence one day when he was lunching at

home; I saw him look curiously at it and bore it away to read in solitude. It

was written on, and enveloped in, heavy late-Victorian mourning paper,

black-coroneted and black-bordered. I read it eagerly:

我收到了塞巴斯蒂安的一封信，这是一件显眼的物品，有一天我父

亲在家吃午饭时，当着他的面带给我;我看到他好奇地看着它，然后把

它拿走，独自阅读。它被写在维多利亚时代晚期沉重的哀悼纸上，并

用黑色冠冕和黑色边框包裹着。我急切地读了起来：

Brideshead Castle,

布里德斯黑德城堡，

Wiltshire.

威尔特郡。

I wonder what the date is

我想知道日期是什么

Dearest Charles,

最亲爱的查尔斯，

I found a box of this paper at the back of a bureau so I must write to you as

I am mourning for my lost innocence. It never looked like living. The

doctors despaired of it from the start.

我在办公室后面发现了一盒这张纸，所以我必须写信给你，因为我正

在为我失去的纯真而哀悼。它从来都不像是活着的。医生们从一开始

就对此感到绝望。

Soon I am off to Venice to stay with my papa in his palace of sin. I wish you

were coming. I wish you were here.

很快我就要去威尼斯，和我爸爸一起住在他的罪恶宫殿里。我希望你

来。我希望你在这里。

I am never quite alone. Members of my family keep turning up and

collecting luggage and going away again but the white raspberries are ripe.

我从不孤单。我的家人不断出现，收拾行李，然后又走了，但白树莓

已经成熟了。

I have a good mind not to take Aloysius to Venice. I don’t want him to meet

a lot of horrid Italian bears and pick up bad habits.

我很好，不要带阿洛伊修斯去威尼斯。我不希望他遇到很多可怕的意

大利熊并养成坏习惯。

Love or what you will.

爱或你愿意的。

I knew his letters of old; I had had them at Ravenna; I should not have

been disappointed; but that day, as I tore the stiff sheet across and let it fall

into the basket, and gazed resentfully across the grimy gardens and irregular

backs of Bayswater, at the jumble of soil-pipes and fire-escapes and

protuberant little conservatories, I saw, in my mind’s eye, the pale face of

Anthony Blanche, peering through the straggling leaves as it had peered

through the candle flames at Thame, and heard, above the murmur of

traffic, his clear tones…“You mustn’t blame Sebastian if at times he seems

a little insipid…. When I hear him talk I am reminded of that in some ways

nauseating picture of ‘Bubbles.’ ”

我认识他的旧信;我在拉文纳吃过它们;我不应该失望;但那天，当我

撕开那张坚硬的床单，让它掉进篮子里，愤恨地凝视着肮脏的花园和

贝斯沃特不规则的背影，凝视着杂乱无章的土管、消防通道和突出的

小温室时，我在我的脑海中看到了安东尼·布兰奇苍白的脸，它透过散

落的树叶凝视着泰晤士河，在车水马龙的嘈杂声中，听到他清晰的语

调......“你不能责怪塞巴斯蒂安，如果他有时看起来有点平淡无奇......当

我听到他说话时，我想起了《泡泡》中令人作呕的画面。"

For days after that I thought I hated Sebastian; then one Sunday

afternoon a telegram came from him, which dispelled that shadow, adding a

new and darker one of its own.

在那之后的几天里，我以为我讨厌塞巴斯蒂安;然后一个星期天的

下午，他发来了一封电报，驱散了那个阴影，增加了一个新的、更黑

暗的阴影。

My father was out and returned to find me in a condition of feverish

anxiety. He stood in the hall with his panama hat still on his head and

beamed at me.

我父亲出去了，回来发现我处于发烧的焦虑状态。他站在大厅里，

头上还戴着巴拿马帽，对我微笑。

“You’ll never guess how I have spent the day; I have been to the Zoo. It

was most agreeable; the animals seem to enjoy the sunshine so much.”

“你永远猜不到我这一天是怎么度过的;我去过动物园。这是最令人

愉快的;动物们似乎非常喜欢阳光。

“Father, I’ve got to leave at once.”

“父亲，我得马上走了。”

“Yes?”

“是吗？”

“A great friend of mine—he’s had a terrible accident. I must go to him at

once. Hayter’s packing for me, now. There’s a train in half an hour.”

“我的一个好朋友——他发生了一场可怕的事故。我必须马上去找

他。Hayter现在为我收拾行李。半小时后就有一班火车。

I showed him the telegram, which read simply: “Gravely injured come

at once Sebastian.”

我给他看了电报，上面写着：“塞巴斯蒂安受了重伤。

“Well,” said my father. “I’m sorry you are upset. Reading this message I

should not say that the accident was as serious as you seem to think—

otherwise it would hardly be signed by the victim himself. Still, of course,

he may well be fully conscious but blind or paralyzed with a broken back.

Why exactly is your presence so necessary? You have no medical

knowledge. You are not in holy orders. Do you hope for a legacy?”

“嗯，”我父亲说。“对不起，你不高兴了。读到这封信，我不应该

说事故像你想象的那么严重——否则受害者本人几乎不会签字。当

然，他很可能完全清醒，但失明或因背部骨折而瘫痪。为什么你的存

在如此必要？你没有医学知识。你不是在圣职人员中。你希望有遗产

吗？

“I told you, he is a great friend.”

“我告诉过你，他是个好朋友。”

“Well, Orme-Herrick is a great friend of mine, but I should not go

tearing off to his deathbed on a warm Sunday afternoon. I should doubt

whether Lady Orme-Herrick would welcome me. However, I see you have

no such doubts. I shall miss you, my dear boy, but do not hurry back on my

account.”

“嗯，奥姆-赫里克是我的好朋友，但我不应该在一个温暖的星期天

下午去他的临终前哭泣。我怀疑奥姆-赫里克夫人是否会欢迎我。但

是，我看到你没有这样的疑问。我会想念你的，我亲爱的孩子，但不

要急着回去。

Paddington Station on that August Sunday evening, with the sun

streaming through the obscure panes of its roof, the bookstalls shut, and the

few passengers strolling unhurried beside their porters, would have soothed

a mind less agitated than mine. The train was nearly empty. I had my

suitcase put in the corner of a third-class carriage and took a seat in the

dining-car. “First dinner after Reading, sir; about seven o’clock. Can I get

you anything now?” I ordered gin and vermouth; it was brought to me as

we pulled out of the station. The knives and forks set up their regular jingle;

the bright landscape rolled past the windows. But I had no mind for these

smooth things; instead, fear worked like yeast in my thoughts, and the

fermentation brought to the surface, in great gobs of scum, the images of

disaster; a loaded gun held carelessly at a stile, a horse rearing and rolling

over, a shaded pool with a submerged stake, an elm bough falling suddenly

on a still morning, a car at a blind corner; all the catalogue of threats to

civilized life rose and haunted me; I even pictured a homicidal maniac

mouthing in the shadows, swinging a length of lead pipe. The cornfields

and heavy woodland sped past, deep in the golden evening, and the throb of

the wheels repeated monotonously in my ears, “You’ve come too late.

You’ve come too late. He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead.”

八月的那个星期天晚上，帕丁顿车站，阳光透过屋顶的朦胧玻璃，

书摊关上了门，少数乘客在搬运工旁边不紧不慢地漫步，这本来可以

抚慰一个不如我激动的心灵。火车上几乎空无一人。我把行李箱放在

三等车厢的角落里，在餐车里坐了下来。“雷丁之后的第一顿晚餐，先

生;大约七点钟。我现在能给你什么吗？我点了杜松子酒和苦艾酒;当

我们离开车站时，它被带到了我面前。刀叉发出有规律的叮当声;明亮

的风景从窗户上滚过。但我对这些顺利的事情没有心思;相反，恐惧在

我的思想中像酵母一样起作用，发酵使灾难的形象浮出水面，成群结

队;一把上膛的枪漫不经心地举在石碑上，一匹马在饲养和翻滚，一个

树荫下的水池，一个沉寂的早晨突然掉落的榆树枝，一辆汽车在死角;

所有对文明生活的威胁都升起并困扰着我;我甚至想象到一个杀人狂在

阴影中大口大口地挥舞着一根铅管。玉米地和茂密的林地飞驰而过，

在金色的傍晚深处，车轮的悸动单调地在我耳边重复，“你来得太晚

了。你来得太晚了。他死了。他死了。他死了。

I dined and changed trains to the local line, and in twilight came to

Melstead Carbury, which was my destination.

我吃了晚饭，换乘火车到当地线路，在黄昏时分来到了梅尔斯特德

卡伯里，这是我的目的地。

“Brideshead, sir? Yes, Lady Julia’s in the yard.”

“新娘头，先生？是的，茱莉亚夫人在院子里。

She was sitting at the wheel of an open car. I recognized her at once; I

could not have failed to do so.

她坐在一辆敞篷车的方向盘上。我一眼就认出了她;我不可能不这

样做。

“You’re Mr. Ryder? Jump in.” Her voice was Sebastian’s and his her

way of speaking.

“你是莱德先生？跳进去。她的声音是塞巴斯蒂安的，也是他的说

话方式。

“How is he?”

“他怎么样了？”

“Sebastian? Oh, he’s fine. Have you had dinner? Well, I expect it was

beastly. There’s some more at home. Sebastian and I are alone, so we

thought we’d wait for you.”

“塞巴斯蒂安？哦，他很好。你吃晚饭了吗？好吧，我想这是野

兽。家里还有更多。塞巴斯蒂安和我独自一人，所以我们以为我们会

等你。

“What’s happened to him?”

“他怎么了？”

“Didn’t he say? I expect he thought you wouldn’t come if you knew.

He’s cracked a bone in his ankle so small that it hasn’t a name. But they X-

rayed it yesterday, and told him to keep it up for a month. It’s a great bore to

him, putting out all his plans; he’s been making the most enormous fuss….

Everyone else has gone. He tried to make me stay back with him. Well, I

expect you know how maddeningly pathetic he can be. I almost gave in,

and then I said: “Surely there must be someone you can get hold of,” and he

said everybody was away or busy and, anyway, no one else would do. But

at last he agreed to try you, and I promised I’d stay if you failed him, so you

can imagine how popular you are with me. I must say it’s noble of you to

come all this way at a moment’s notice.” But as she said it, I heard, or

thought I heard, a tiny note of contempt in her voice that I should be so

readily available.

“他不是说了吗？我猜他以为你知道了就不会来了。他的脚踝骨折

了一根骨头，小到连名字都没有。但是他们昨天给它拍了X光片，并

告诉他要坚持一个月。这对他来说是一个很大的无聊，把他所有的计

划都抛在脑后;他一直在大惊小怪......其他人都走了。他试图让我和他

呆在一起。好吧，我希望你知道他有多可悲。我几乎屈服了，然后我

说：“肯定有人可以抓住你，”他说每个人都不在或忙碌，无论如何，

没有其他人会这样做。但最后他同意试试你，我答应如果你让他失

望，我会留下来，所以你可以想象你在我心目中有多受欢迎。我必须

说，你一时冲动就来到这里，真是太高尚了。但当她说这句话时，我

听到，或者说我以为我听到了，她的声音里有一丝轻蔑，我应该这么

容易得到。

“How did he do it?”

“他是怎么做到的？”

“Believe it or not, playing croquet. He lost his temper and tripped over a

hoop. Not a very honorable scar.”

“信不信由你，打槌球。他发脾气，被一个篮筐绊倒了。不是一个

非常光荣的伤疤。

She so much resembled Sebastian that, sitting beside her in the gathering

dusk, I was confused by the double illusion of familiarity and strangeness.

Thus, looking through strong lenses, one may watch a man approaching

from afar, study every detail of his face and clothes, believe one has only to

put out a hand to touch him, marvel that he does not hear one and look up

as one moves, and then, seeing him with the naked eye, suddenly remember

that one is to him a distant speck, doubtfully human. I knew her and she did

not know me. Her dark hair was scarcely longer than Sebastian’s, and it

blew back from her forehead as his did; her eyes on the darkling road were

his, but larger; her painted mouth was less friendly to the world. She wore a

bangle of charms on her wrist and in her ears little gold rings. Her light coat

revealed an inch or two of flowered silk; skirts were short in those days, and

her legs, stretched forward to the controls of the car, were spindly, as was

also the fashion. Because her sex was the palpable difference between the

familiar and the strange, it seemed to fill the space between us, so that I felt

her to be especially female, as I had felt of no woman before.

她和塞巴斯蒂安太像了，在黄昏时分，坐在她身边，我被熟悉和陌

生的双重错觉弄糊涂了。因此，透过强镜看，人们可能会看到一个人

从远处走来，研究他的脸和衣服的每一个细节，相信一个人只需要伸

出一只手去触摸他，惊奇地发现他没有听到一个声音，并在一个人移

动时抬起头来，然后，用肉眼看到他，突然想起一个人对他来说是一

个遥远的斑点，怀疑是人类。我认识她，她不认识我。她的黑发比塞

巴斯蒂安的长不了多少，像塞巴斯蒂安一样从她的额头上吹回来;她在

黑暗的道路上的眼睛是他的，但更大;她画的嘴巴对世界不太友好。她

的手腕上戴着一个吊饰手镯，耳朵上戴着小金戒指。她轻薄的外套露

出一两英寸的花丝绸;在那个年代，裙子很短，她的双腿向前伸展到汽

车的控制装置上，很细长，也很时尚。因为她的性别是熟悉和陌生之

间的明显区别，它似乎填补了我们之间的空间，所以我觉得她特别女

性化，就像我以前没有感觉到的女人一样。

“I’m terrified of driving at this time of the evening,” she said. “There

doesn’t seem anyone left at home who can drive a car. Sebastian and I are

practically camping out here. I hope you haven’t come expecting a

pompous party.” She leaned forward to the locker for a box of cigarettes.

“我害怕在晚上的这个时候开车，”她说。“家里似乎没有人会开

车。塞巴斯蒂安和我实际上在这里露营。我希望你没有期待一个浮夸

的派对。她身体前倾到储物柜前，拿了一盒香烟。

“No thanks.”

“不用了，谢谢。”

“Light one for me, will you?”

“给我点一盏，好吗？”

It was the first time in my life that anyone had asked this of me, and as I

took the cigarette from my lips and put it in hers, I caught a thin bat’s

squeak of sexuality, inaudible to any but me.

这是我有生以来第一次有人问我这个问题，当我从嘴里拿出香烟放

进她的嘴里时，我听到了一只细蝙蝠的性吱吱声，除了我之外，没有

人能听到。

“Thanks. You’ve been here before. Nanny reported it. We both thought it

very odd of you not to stay to tea with me.”

“谢谢。你以前来过这里。保姆报告了。我们俩都觉得你不留下来

和我一起喝茶很奇怪。

“That was Sebastian.”

“那是塞巴斯蒂安。”

“You seem to let him boss you about a good deal. You shouldn’t. It’s

very bad for him.”

“你似乎让他在你身上做老板。你不应该。这对他来说非常糟糕。

We had turned the corner of the drive now; the color had died in the

woods and sky, and the house seemed painted in grisaille, save for the

central golden square at the open doors. A man was waiting to take my

luggage.

我们现在已经转过了车道的拐角;在树林和天空中，颜色已经消失

了，房子似乎被涂上了灰色，除了敞开的门中央的金色方块。一个男

人在等着拿我的行李。

“Here we are.”

“我们来了。”

She led me up the steps and into the hall, flung her coat on a marble

table, and stooped to fondle a dog which came to greet her. “I wouldn’t put

it past Sebastian to have started dinner.”

她领着我走上台阶，走进大厅，把外套甩在大理石桌上，弯腰抚摸

一只前来迎接她的狗。“我不会让塞巴斯蒂安开始吃晚饭的。

At that moment he appeared between the pillars at the further end,

propelling himself in a wheel-chair. He was in pajamas and dressing-gown,

with one foot heavily bandaged.

就在这时，他出现在另一端的柱子之间，坐在轮椅上。他穿着睡衣

和睡袍，一只脚上缠着绷带。

“Well, darling, I’ve collected your chum,” she said, again with a barely

perceptible note of contempt.

“好吧，亲爱的，我已经收集了你的傻瓜，”她说，又带着一种几乎

察觉不到的轻蔑。

“I thought you were dying,” I said, conscious then, as I had been ever

since I arrived, of the predominating emotion of vexation, rather than of

relief, that I had been bilked of my expectations of a grand tragedy.

“我以为你快死了，”我说，那时我意识到，就像我来到这里以来一

样，我有一种主要的情绪，即烦恼，而不是解脱，我已经摆脱了对一

场大悲剧的期望。

“I thought I was, too. The pain was excruciating. Julia, do you think, if

you asked him, Wilcox would give us champagne tonight?”

“我以为我也是。疼痛是难以忍受的。茱莉亚，你认为，如果你问

他，威尔科克斯今晚会给我们香槟吗？

“I hate champagne and Mr. Ryder has had dinner.”

“我讨厌香槟，莱德先生已经吃过晚饭了。

“Mister Ryder? Mister Ryder? Charles drinks champagne at all hours.

Do you know, seeing this great swaddled foot of mine, I can’t get it out of

my mind that I have gout, and that gives me a craving for champagne.”

“莱德先生？莱德先生？查尔斯全天候喝香槟。你知道吗，看到我

这只巨大的襁褓脚，我无法忘记我有痛风，这让我渴望喝香槟。

We dined in a room they called “the Painted Parlour.” It was a spacious

octagon, later in design than the rest of the house; its walls were adorned

with wreathed medallions and across its dome prim Pompeian figures stood

in pastoral groups. They and the satin-wood and ormolu furniture, the

carpet, the hanging bronze candelabrum, the mirrors and sconces, were all a

single composition, the design of one illustrious hand. “We usually eat here

when we’re alone,” said Sebastian, “it’s so cozy.”

我们在一个被他们称为“彩绘客厅”的房间里用餐。这是一个宽敞的

八角形，设计比房子的其他部分晚;它的墙壁上装饰着花环奖章，在圆

顶上，庞贝王朝的原始人物站在牧民群体中。它们与缎木和ormolu家

具，地毯，悬挂的青铜烛台，镜子和壁灯，都是一个单一的组合，一

个杰出的手的设计。“我们通常一个人在这里吃饭，”塞巴斯蒂安说，

“太舒服了。

While they dined I ate a peach and told them of the war with my father.

当他们吃饭时，我吃了一个桃子，告诉他们与我父亲的战争。

“He sounds a perfect poppet,” said Julia. “And now I’m going to leave

you boys.”

“他听起来是一个完美的流行音乐，”朱莉娅说。“现在我要离开你

们这些孩子了。”

“Where are you off to?”

“你要去哪里？”

“The nursery. I promised nanny a last game of halma.” She kissed the

top of Sebastian’s head. I opened the door for her. “Good night, Mr. Ryder,

and good-bye. I don’t suppose we’ll meet tomorrow. I’m leaving early. I

can’t tell you how grateful I am to you for relieving me at the sick-bed.”

“托儿所。我答应保姆最后一杯哈尔玛。她吻了吻塞巴斯蒂安的头

顶。我为她开了门。“晚安，莱德先生，再见。我不认为我们明天会见

面。我要早点走了。我无法告诉你我是多么感激你在病床上解救了

我。

“My sister’s very pompous tonight,” said Sebastian, when she was gone.

“我姐姐今晚很自负，”塞巴斯蒂安说，当她离开时。

“I don’t think she cares for me,” I said.

“我不认为她关心我，”我说。

“I don’t think she cares for anyone much. I love her. She’s so like me.”

“我不认为她太关心任何人。我爱她。她太像我了。

“Do you? Is she?”

“

是吗？是吗？

“In looks I mean and the way she talks. I wouldn’t love anyone with a

character like mine.”

“我的意思是外表和她说话的方式。我不会喜欢像我这样性格的

人。

When we had drunk our port, I walked beside Sebastian’s chair through

the pillared hall to the library, where we sat that night and nearly every

night of the ensuing month. It lay on the side of the house that overlooked

the lakes; the windows were open to the stars and the scented air, to the

indigo and silver, moonlit landscape of the valley and the sound of water

falling in the fountain.

当我们喝完波特酒后，我走到塞巴斯蒂安的椅子旁边，穿过有柱子

的大厅，来到图书馆，那天晚上我们坐在那里，接下来一个月几乎每

个晚上都坐在那里。它躺在房子的一侧，俯瞰着湖泊;窗户敞开着，可

以看到星星和芬芳的空气，可以看到靛蓝色和银色，山谷的月光景观

和喷泉中落水的声音。

“We’ll have a heavenly time alone,” said Sebastian, and when next

morning, while I was shaving, I saw from my bathroom window Julia, with

luggage at her back, drive from the forecourt and disappear at the hill’s

crest, without a backward glance, I felt a sense of liberation and peace such

as I was to know years later when, after a night of unrest, the sirens sounded

the “All Clear.”

塞巴斯蒂安说：“我们将度过一段天堂般的独处时光，”第二天早

上，当我刮胡子时，我从浴室的窗户看到茱莉亚背着行李，从前院开

车，消失在山顶上，没有回头看一眼，我感到一种解放与和平的感

觉，就像我多年后所知道的那样，经过一夜的骚乱，警笛声响起了

“一切顺利”。

Four

四

The languor of Youth—how unique and quintessential it is! How quickly,

how irrecoverably, lost! The zest, the generous affections, the illusions, the

despair, all the traditional attributes of Youth—all save this—come and go

with us through life. These things are a part of life itself; but languor—the

relaxation of yet unwearied sinews, the mind sequestered and self-regarding

—that belongs to Youth alone and dies with it. Perhaps in the mansions of

Limbo the heroes enjoy some such compensation for their loss of the

Beatific Vision; perhaps the Beatific Vision itself has some remote kinship

with this lowly experience; I, at any rate, believed myself very near heaven,

during those languid days at Brideshead.

青春的慵懒——它是多么独特和典型！输得多么快，多么不可挽回！

热情、慷慨的感情、幻想、绝望，青春的所有传统属性——除了这些

——都伴随着我们一生。这些东西是生活本身的一部分;而是慵懒——

松弛而又不厌其烦的筋骨，封闭和自尊的心——只属于青春，也随之

消亡。也许在Limbo的豪宅中，英雄们因失去真福愿景而享受到一些

这样的补偿;也许真福异象本身与这种卑微的经历有某种遥远的亲缘关

系;无论如何，在布里德斯黑德的那些慵懒的日子里，我相信自己离天

堂很近。

“Why is this house called a ‘Castle’?”

“为什么这所房子被称为'城堡'？”

“It used to be one until they moved it.”

“在他们移动它之前，它曾经是一个。”

“What can you mean?”

“你什么意思？”

“Just that. We had a castle a mile away, down by the village. Then we

took a fancy to the valley and pulled the castle down, carted the stones up

here, and built a new house. I’m glad they did, aren’t you?”

“就是这样。我们在一英里外有一座城堡，在村子旁边。然后我们

看中了山谷，把城堡推倒了，把石头运到这里，盖了一座新房子。我

很高兴他们做到了，不是吗？

“If it was mine I’d never live anywhere else.”

“如果是我的，我永远不会住在别的地方。”

“But you see, Charles, it isn’t mine. Just at the moment it is, but usually

it’s full of ravening beasts. If it could only be like this always—always

summer, always alone, the fruit always ripe and Aloysius in a good

temper…”

“但你看，查尔斯，这不是我的。就在此时此刻，但通常它充满了

贪婪的野兽。要是能一直这样就好了——永远是夏天，永远是孤独

的，果实总是成熟，阿洛伊修斯脾气好......”

It is thus I like to remember Sebastian, as he was that summer, when we

wandered alone together through that enchanted palace; Sebastian in his

wheel-chair spinning down the box-edged walks of the kitchen gardens in

search of alpine strawberries and warm figs, propelling himself through the

succession of hot-houses, from scent to scent and climate to climate, to cut

the muscat grapes and choose orchids for our button-holes; Sebastian

hobbling with a pantomime of difficulty to the old nurseries, sitting beside

me on the threadbare, flowered carpet with the toy-cupboard empty about

us and Nanny Hawkins stitching complacently in the corner, saying,

“You’re one as bad as the other; a pair of children the two of you. Is that

what they teach you at College?” Sebastian supine on the sunny seat in the

colonnade, as he was now, and I in a hard chair beside him, trying to draw

the fountain.

因此，我想记住塞巴斯蒂安，就像那个夏天一样，我们一起独自漫

步在那座迷人的宫殿里;塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）坐在轮椅上，沿着厨

房花园的箱形步道旋转，寻找高山草莓和温暖的无花果，推动自己穿

过一连串的温室，从香味到香味，从气候到气候，切麝香葡萄，为我

们的纽扣孔选择兰花;塞巴斯蒂安艰难地蹒跚着走向旧托儿所，坐在我

旁边光秃秃的花地毯上，玩具柜里空空如也，保姆霍金斯在角落里沾

沾自喜地缝制，说：“你和另一个一样糟糕;一对孩子，你们两个。这

是他们在大学里教你的吗？塞巴斯蒂安仰卧在柱廊阳光明媚的座位

上，就像他现在一样，我坐在他旁边的硬椅子上，试图画喷泉。

“Is the dome by Inigo Jones, too? It looks later.”

“穹顶也是伊尼戈·琼斯的吗？它看起来更晚。

“Oh, Charles, don’t be such a tourist. What does it matter when it was

built, if it’s pretty?”

“哦，查尔斯，不要做这样的游客。如果它很漂亮，它什么时候建

成又有什么关系呢？

“It’s the sort of thing I like to know.”

“这是我想知道的那种事情。”

“Oh dear, I thought I’d cured you of all that—the terrible Mr. Collins.”

“噢，亲爱的，我以为我已经治好了你——那个可怕的柯林斯先

生。

It was an aesthetic education to live within those walls, to wander from

room to room, from the Soanesque library to the Chinese drawing-room,

adazzle with gilt pagodas and nodding mandarins, painted paper and

Chippendale fretwork, from the Pompeian parlor to the great tapestry-hung

hall which stood unchanged, as it had been designed two hundred and fifty

years before; to sit, hour after hour, in the shade looking out on the terrace.

生活在这些围墙内，从一个房间到另一个房间，从索恩斯式图书馆

到中国客厅，从庞贝式的客厅到悬挂着挂毯的大殿，从两百五十年前

的设计，到处都是镀金的宝塔和点头的柑橘、彩绘纸和齐本德尔的镂

空画，这是一种审美教育;一小时又一小时地坐在树荫下，眺望露台。

This terrace was the final consummation of the house’s plan; it stood on

massive stone ramparts above the lakes, so that from the hall steps it

seemed to overhang them, as though, standing by the balustrade, one could

have dropped a pebble into the first of them immediately below one’s feet.

It was embraced by the two arms of the colonnade; beyond the pavilions

groves of lime led to the wooded hillsides. Part of the terrace was paved,

part planted with flower-beds and arabesques of dwarf box; taller box grew

in a dense hedge, making a wide oval, cut into niches and interspersed with

statuary, and, in the center, dominating the whole splendid space rose the

fountain; such a fountain as one might expect to find in a piazza of southern

Italy; such a fountain as was, indeed, found there a century ago by one of

Sebastian’s ancestors; found, purchased, imported and re-erected in an alien

but welcoming climate.

这个露台是房子计划的最终完成;它矗立在湖面上方的巨大石墙

上，因此从大厅的台阶上看，它似乎悬在它们之上，就好像站在栏杆

旁，人们可以将一颗鹅卵石扔进脚下的第一块石墙上。它被柱廊的两

个手臂所拥抱;在亭子之外，石灰树林通向树木繁茂的山坡。露台的一

部分是铺砌的，一部分种植了花坛和矮盒子的蔓藤花纹;高大的盒子生

长在茂密的篱笆中，形成一个宽阔的椭圆形，切成壁龛并穿插着雕

像，在中心，主宰着整个灿烂的空间升起喷泉;人们可能期望在意大利

南部的广场上找到这样的喷泉;一个世纪前，塞巴斯蒂安的一位祖先确

实在那里发现了这样的喷泉;在陌生但热情的气候中发现、购买、进口

和重新竖立。

Sebastian set me to draw it. It was an ambitious subject for an amateur

—an oval basin with an island of sculptured rocks at its center; on the rocks

grew, in stone, formal tropical vegetation and wild English fern in its

natural fronds; through them ran a dozen streams that counterfeited springs,

and round them sported fantastic tropical animals, camels and camelopards

and an ebullient lion, all vomiting water; on the rocks, to the height of the

pediment, stood an Egyptian obelisk of red sandstone—but, by some odd

chance, for the thing was far beyond me, I brought it off and, by judicious

omissions and some stylish tricks, produced a very passable echo of

Piranesi. “Shall I give it to your mother?” I asked.

塞巴斯蒂安让我画它。对于一个业余爱好者来说，这是一个雄心勃

勃的主题——一个椭圆形的盆地，中心有一个雕刻的岩石岛;在岩石

上，石头上生长着正式的热带植被和天然叶子中的野生英国蕨类植物;

穿过它们，有十几条溪流，这些溪流是假泉水，在它们周围运动着奇

妙的热带动物，骆驼和骆驼豹，还有一头热情洋溢的狮子，都在吐水;

在山形墙的岩石上，矗立着一座由红砂岩制成的埃及方尖碑——但

是，由于某种奇怪的机会，因为那东西远远超出了我的范围，我把它

取下来，通过明智的省略和一些时髦的技巧，产生了一个非常过得去

的皮拉内西的回声。“我把它给妈好吗？”我问。

“Why? You don’t know her.”

“为什么？你不认识她。

“It seems polite. I’m staying in her house.”

“这似乎很有礼貌。我住在她家里。

“Give it to nanny,” said Sebastian.

“把它交给保姆，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

I did so, and she put it among the collection on the top of her chest of

drawers, remarking that it had quite a look of the thing, which she had often

heard admired but could never see the beauty of, herself.

我照做了，她把它放在抽屉柜的顶部，说它看起来很像这个东西，

她经常听到有人欣赏它，但她自己却从来看不到它的美丽。

For me the beauty was new-found.

对我来说，这种美是新发现的。

Since the days when, as a schoolboy, I used to bicycle round the

neighboring parishes, rubbing brasses and photographing fonts, I had

nursed a love of architecture, but, though in opinion I had made that easy

leap, characteristic of my generation, from the puritanism of Ruskin to the

puritanism of Roger Fry, my sentiments at heart were insular and medieval.

从我还是个小学生的时候，我就经常骑自行车在邻近的教区里转

悠，揉搓黄铜和拍摄字体，从那时起，我就对建筑产生了热爱，但

是，尽管在我看来，我已经实现了我们这一代人特有的轻松飞跃，从

拉斯金的清教主义到罗杰·弗莱的清教主义，但我内心的情感是孤立的

和中世纪的。

This was my conversion to the Baroque. Here under that high and

insolent dome, under those coffered ceilings; here, as I passed through those

arches and broken pediments to the pillared shade beyond and sat, hour by

hour, before the fountain, probing its shadows, tracing its lingering echoes,

rejoicing in all its clustered feats of daring and invention, I felt a whole new

system of nerves alive within me, as though the water that spurted and

bubbled among its stones, was indeed a life-giving spring.

这是我皈依巴洛克风格。在那高耸而傲慢的穹顶下，在那些格子天

花板下;在这里，当我穿过那些拱门和破碎的山墙，来到远处的树荫

下，一小时一小时地坐在喷泉前，探查它的影子，追踪它挥之不去的

回声，为它所有大胆和发明的壮举而欢欣鼓舞时，我感到一个全新的

神经系统在我体内活跃起来，仿佛水在它的石头中喷涌而出，确实是

一个赋予生命的春天。

One day in a cupboard we found a large japanned-tin box of oil-paints still

in workable condition.

有一天，我们在一个橱柜里发现了一个大日本锡盒，里面装着油画颜

料，仍然完好无损。

“Mummy bought them a year or two ago. Someone told her that you

could only appreciate the beauty of the world by trying to paint it. We

laughed at her a great deal about it. She couldn’t draw at all, and however

bright the colors were in the tubes, by the time mummy had mixed them up,

they came out a kind of khaki.” Various dry, muddy smears on the palette

confirmed this statement. “Cordelia was always made to wash the brushes.

In the end we all protested and made mummy stop.”

“妈妈一两年前买了它们。有人告诉她，只有尝试画出世界，才能

欣赏世界的美丽。我们为此嘲笑了她很多。她根本不会画画，无论管

子里的颜色多么鲜艳，当妈妈把它们混合在一起时，它们就变成了一

种卡其色。调色板上各种干燥、泥泞的污迹证实了这一说法。

“Cordelia总是被要求洗刷子。最后，我们都抗议了，让妈妈停了下

来。

The paints gave us the idea of decorating the office; this was a small

room opening on the colonnade; it had once been used for estate business,

but was now derelict, holding only some garden games and a tub of dead

aloes; it had plainly been designed for a softer use, perhaps as a tea-room or

study, for the plaster walls were decorated with delicate Rococo panels and

the roof was prettily groined. Here, in one of the smaller oval frames, I

sketched a romantic landscape, and in the days that followed filled it out in

color, and, by luck and the happy mood of the moment, made a success of

it. The brush seemed somehow to do what was wanted of it. It was a

landscape without figures, a summer scene of white cloud and blue

distances with an ivy-clad ruin in the foreground, rocks and a waterfall

affording a rugged introduction to the receding parkland behind. I knew

little of oil-painting and learned its ways as I worked. When, in a week, it

was finished, Sebastian was eager for me to start on one of the larger

panels. I made some sketches. He called for a fête champêtre with a

ribboned swing and a Negro page and a shepherd playing the pipes, but the

thing languished. I knew it was good chance that had made my landscape,

and that this elaborate pastiche was too much for me.

油漆给了我们装饰办公室的想法;这是柱廊上的一个小房间;它曾经

用于房地产业务，但现在已经废弃，只举办一些花园游戏和一桶死芦

荟;它显然被设计成一个更柔和的用途，也许是作为茶室或书房，因为

石膏墙上装饰着精致的洛可可式面板，屋顶有漂亮的腹股沟。在这

里，在一个较小的椭圆形框架中，我勾勒出一幅浪漫的风景，并在随

后的日子里用颜色填充它，并且，由于运气和当下的快乐心情，它取

得了成功。刷子似乎以某种方式做了它想要的事情。这是一幅没有人

物的风景，是白云和蓝色远方的夏日景象，前景是常春藤覆盖的废

墟，岩石和瀑布为后面后退的公园提供了崎岖的介绍。我对油画知之

甚少，并在工作时学习了它的方式。一周后，当它完成时，塞巴斯蒂

安渴望我从一个更大的面板开始。我画了一些草图。他要求举办一场

带有丝带秋千的宴会，一个黑人页面和一个吹笛子的牧羊人，但事情

萎靡不振。我知道这是造就我风景的好机会，而这种精心制作的糕点

对我来说太过分了。

One day we went down to the cellars with Wilcox and saw the empty

bays which had once held a vast store of wine; one transept only was used

now; there the bins were well stocked, some of them with vintages fifty

years old.

有一天，我们和威尔科克斯一起去酒窖，看到空荡荡的海湾，那里

曾经存放着大量的葡萄酒。现在只使用了一个耳堂;那里的垃圾箱里装

满了垃圾，其中一些是五十年前的葡萄酒。

“There’s been nothing added since his Lordship went abroad,” said

Wilcox. “A lot of the old wine wants drinking up. We ought to have laid

down the eighteens and twenties. I’ve had several letters about it from the

wine merchants, but her Ladyship says to ask Lord Brideshead, and he says

to ask his Lordship, and his Lordship says to ask the lawyers. That’s how

we get low. There’s enough here for ten years at the rate it’s going, but how

shall we be then?”

“自从他的勋爵出国以来，没有增加任何东西，”威尔科克斯说。

“很多老酒都想喝掉。我们应该放下十八岁和二十岁。我收到了几封酒

商的信，但她的夫人说要问新娘头勋爵，他说要问他的勋爵，他的勋

爵说要问律师。这就是我们变低的方式。按照它的发展速度，这里已

经足够十年了，但那我们该怎么做呢？

Wilcox welcomed our interest; we had bottles brought up from every

bin, and it was during those tranquil evenings with Sebastian that I first

made a serious acquaintance with wine and sowed the seed of that rich

harvest which was to be my stay in many barren years. We would sit, he

and I, in the Painted Parlour with three bottles open on the table and three

glasses before each of us; Sebastian had found a book on wine-tasting, and

we followed its instructions in detail. We warmed the glass slightly at a

candle, filled it a third high, swirled the wine round, nursed it in our hands,

held it to the light, breathed it, sipped it, filled our mouths with it, and rolled

it over the tongue, ringing it on the palate like a coin on a counter, tilted our

heads back and let it trickle down the throat. Then we talked of it and

nibbled Bath Oliver biscuits, and passed on to another wine; then back to

the first, then on to another, until all three were in circulation and the order

of glasses got confused, and we fell out over which was which, and we

passed the glasses to and fro between us until there were six glasses, some

of them with mixed wines in them which we had filled from the wrong

bottle, till we were obliged to start again with three clean glasses each, and

the bottles were empty and our praise of them wilder and more exotic.

威尔科克斯对我们的兴趣表示欢迎;我们从每个垃圾箱里拿出瓶

子，正是在塞巴斯蒂安的那些宁静的夜晚，我第一次认真地认识了葡

萄酒，并播下了丰收的种子，这将是我在许多贫瘠的岁月里留下来

的。他和我坐在彩绘客厅里，桌子上放着三个瓶子，我们每个人面前

有三个玻璃杯;塞巴斯蒂安找到了一本关于品酒的书，我们详细地遵循

了它的指示。我们用蜡烛稍微加热了一下杯子，把它装满了三分之一

高，把酒转了一圈，把它捧在手里，把它放在灯下，呼吸它，啜饮

它，用它填满我们的嘴，把它卷到舌头上，像柜台上的硬币一样在味

蕾上敲响，把头向后仰，让它顺着喉咙流下来。然后我们谈论它，啃

了巴斯奥利弗饼干，然后又喝了一杯酒。然后回到第一个，然后又回

到另一个，直到三个都流通了，杯子的顺序变得混乱了，我们争吵了

哪个是哪个，我们在我们之间来回传递杯子，直到有六个杯子，其中

一些杯子里装着我们从错误的瓶子里倒的混合酒，直到我们不得不重

新开始，每人三个干净的玻璃杯，瓶子是空的，我们对它们的赞美更

加狂野和异国情调。

“… It is a little, shy wine like a gazelle.”

"...它是一种像瞪羚一样害羞的小酒。

“Like a leprechaun.”

“像个小妖精。”

“Dappled, in a tapestry meadow.”

“斑驳的，在挂毯草地上。”

“Like a flute by still water.”

“就像静水边的笛子。”

“… And this is a wise old wine.”

"...这是一款明智的老酒。

“A prophet in a cave.”

“山洞里的先知。”

“… And this is a necklace of pearls on a white neck.”

"...这是一条白色脖子上的珍珠项链。

“Like a swan.”

“像天鹅一样。”

“Like the last unicorn.”

“就像最后一只独角兽一样。”

And we would leave the golden candlelight of the dining-room for the

starlight outside and sit on the edge of the fountain, cooling our hands in the

water and listening drunkenly to its splash and gurgle over the rocks.

我们会把餐厅的金色烛光留给外面的星光，坐在喷泉的边缘，在水

中冷却双手，醉醺醺地听着它在岩石上的飞溅和潺潺声。

“Ought we to be drunk every night?” Sebastian asked one morning.

“我们应该每天晚上都喝醉吗？”一天早上，塞巴斯蒂安问道。

“Yes, I think so.”

“是的，我想是的。”

“I think so too.”

“我也这么认为。”

We saw few strangers. There was the agent, a lean and pouchy colonel, who

crossed our path occasionally and once came to tea. Usually we managed to

hide from him. On Sundays a monk was fetched from a neighboring

monastery to say mass and breakfast with us. He was the first priest I ever

met; I noticed how unlike he was to a parson, but Brideshead was a place of

such enchantment to me that I expected everything and everyone to be

unique; Father Phipps was in fact a bland, bun-faced man with an interest in

county cricket which he obstinately believed us to share.

我们很少见到陌生人。有一位特工，一个瘦削的上校，他偶尔会从我

们身边经过，有一次来喝茶。通常我们设法躲避他。星期天，一位僧

侣从邻近的寺院被请来和我们一起做弥撒和早餐。他是我见过的第一

位神父;我注意到他与牧师有多么不同，但布里德斯黑德对我来说是一

个如此迷人的地方，我希望一切都是独一无二的;事实上，菲普斯神父

是一个平淡无奇的包子脸男人，他对县板球很感兴趣，他固执地认为

我们会分享。

“You know, Father, Charles and I simply don’t know about cricket.”

“你知道，父亲，查尔斯和我根本不懂板球。

“I wish I’d seen Tennyson make that fifty-eight last Thursday. That must

have been an innings. The account in The Times was excellent. Did you see

him against the South Africans?”

“我希望我能看到丁尼生在上周四打出58杆。那一定是一局。《泰

晤士报》的报道非常好。你看到他对阵南非人了吗？

“I’ve never seen him.”

“我从来没见过他。”

“Neither have I. I haven’t seen a first-class match for years—not since

Father Graves took me when we were passing through Leeds, after we’d

been to the induction of the Abbot at Ampleforth. Father Graves managed

to look up a train which gave us three hours to wait on the afternoon of the

match against Lancashire. That was an afternoon. I remember every ball of

it. Since then I’ve had to go by the papers. You seldom go to see cricket?”

“我也没有。我已经很多年没有看过一场一流的比赛了——自从格

雷夫斯神父带我经过利兹之后，我们去过安普尔福斯的修道院院长的

就职典礼之后，就没有看过了。格雷夫斯神父设法查了一列火车，在

对阵兰开夏郡的比赛下午，我们花了三个小时等待。那是一个下午。

我记得它的每一个球。从那以后，我不得不去看报纸。你很少去看板

球吗？

“Never,” I said, and he looked at me with the expression I have seen

since in the religious, of innocent wonder that those who expose themselves

to the dangers of the world should avail themselves so little of its varied

solace.

“从来没有，”我说，他用我从宗教界看到的表情看着我，天真地惊

奇那些将自己暴露在世界危险中的人竟然很少得到世界的各种安慰。

Sebastian always heard his mass, which was ill-attended. Brideshead

was not an old-established center of Catholicism. Lady Marchmain had

introduced a few Catholic servants, but the majority of them, and all the

cottagers, prayed, if anywhere, among the Flyte tombs in the little gray

church at the gates.

塞巴斯蒂安总是听到他的弥撒，但无人问津。布里德斯黑德不是一

个古老的天主教中心。马奇曼夫人介绍了几个天主教仆人，但他们中

的大多数人，以及所有的村民，都在门口那座灰色小教堂的弗莱特坟

墓中祈祷。

Sebastian’s faith was an enigma to me at that time, but not one which I

felt particularly concerned to solve. I had no religion. I was taken to church

weekly as a child, and at school attended chapel daily, but, as though in

compensation, from the time I went to my public school I was excused

church in the holidays. The masters who taught me Divinity told me that

biblical texts were highly untrustworthy. They never suggested I should try

to pray. My father did not go to church except on family occasions and then

with derision. My mother, I think, was devout. It once seemed odd to me

that she should have thought it her duty to leave my father and me and go

off with an ambulance, to Serbia, to die of exhaustion in the snow in

Bosnia. But later I recognized some such spirit in myself. Later, too, I have

come to accept claims which then, in 1923, I never troubled to examine,

and to accept the supernatural as the real. I was aware of no such needs that

summer at Brideshead.

塞巴斯蒂安的信仰当时对我来说是一个谜，但并不是我特别关心要

解决的问题。我没有宗教信仰。我小时候每周都去教堂，在学校里每

天都去教堂，但是，好像是为了补偿，从我去公立学校开始，我就被

免除了假期去教堂。教我神学的大师告诉我，圣经经文非常不可信。

他们从来没有建议我试着祷告。我父亲不去教堂，除非在家庭场合，

然后是嘲笑。我想，我的母亲是虔诚的。我曾经觉得很奇怪，她应该

认为她有责任离开我父亲和我，乘坐救护车前往塞尔维亚，在波斯尼

亚的雪地里筋疲力尽地死去。但后来我在自己身上看到了一些这样的

精神。后来，我也开始接受这些说法，然后在1923年，我从不费力地

去检查，并接受超自然是真实的。那年夏天，我在布里德斯黑德

（Brideshead）意识到没有这样的需求。

Often, almost daily, since I had known Sebastian, some chance word in

his conversation had reminded me that he was a Catholic, but I took it as a

foible, like his teddy-bear. We never discussed the matter until on the

second Sunday at Brideshead, when Father Phipps had left us and we sat in

the colonnade with the papers, he surprised me by saying: “Oh dear, it’s

very difficult being a Catholic.”

自从我认识塞巴斯蒂安以来，几乎每天都有他谈话中的一些偶然的

词提醒我他是一个天主教徒，但我认为这是一个弱点，就像他的泰迪

熊一样。我们从未讨论过这件事，直到在布里德斯黑德的第二个星期

天，当菲普斯神父离开我们，我们拿着文件坐在柱廊上时，他惊讶地

说：“哦，亲爱的，做一个天主教徒非常困难。

“Does it make much difference to you?”

“这对你有多大影响吗？”

“Of course. All the time.”

“当然。无时无刻不在。

“Well, I can’t say I’ve noticed it. Are you struggling against temptation?

You don’t seem much more virtuous than me.”

“好吧，我不能说我已经注意到了。你是否在与诱惑作斗争？你似

乎并不比我贤惠多少。

“I’m very, very much wickeder,” said Sebastian indignantly.

“我非常非常邪恶，”塞巴斯蒂安愤愤不平地说。

“Well then?”

“那好吧？”

“Who was it used to pray, “O God, make me good, but not yet”?”

“是谁曾经祷告说：'上帝啊，求你使我好，但现在还不行'？”

“I don’t know. You, I should think.”

“我不知道。你，我应该想想。

“Why, yes, I do, every day. But it isn’t that.” He turned back to the pages

of the News of the World and said, “Another naughty scout-master.”

“为什么，是的，我每天都这样做。但事实并非如此。他回头翻开

《世界新闻报》的版面，说：“又一个顽皮的侦察长。

“I suppose they try and make you believe an awful lot of nonsense?”

“我想他们试图让你相信很多胡说八道？”

“Is it nonsense? I wish it were. It sometimes sounds terribly sensible to

me.”

“这是胡说八道吗？但愿如此。有时对我来说，这听起来非常明

智。

“But my dear Sebastian, you can’t seriously believe it all.”

“但是我亲爱的塞巴斯蒂安，你不能真的相信这一切。

“Can’t I?”

“我不能吗？”

“I mean about Christmas and the star and the three kings and the ox and

the ass.”

“我的意思是关于圣诞节、星星、三王、牛和驴。”

“Oh yes, I believe that. It’s a lovely idea.”

“哦，是的，我相信。这是个好主意。

“But you can’t believe things because they’re a lovely idea.”

“但你不能相信事情，因为它们是个好主意。

“But I do. That’s how I believe.”

“但我愿意。我就是这么认为的。

“And in prayers? Do you think you can kneel down in front of a statue

and say a few words, not even out loud, just in your mind, and change the

weather; or that some saints are more influential than others, and you must

get hold of the right one to help you on the right problem?”

“在祈祷中呢？你以为你可以跪在雕像前说几句话，甚至不大声

说，只是在你的脑海中，改变天气吗？或者说有些圣人比其他圣人更

有影响力，你必须找到合适的人来帮助你解决正确的问题？

“Oh yes. Don’t you remember last term when I took Aloysius and left

him behind I didn’t know where. I prayed like mad to St. Anthony of Padua

that morning, and immediately after lunch there was Mr. Nichols at

Canterbury Gate with Aloysius in his arms, saying I’d left him in his cab.”

“哦，是的。你不记得上个学期我带走阿洛伊修斯并把他抛在身后

时，我不知道在哪里。那天早上，我像疯了一样向帕多瓦的圣安东尼

祈祷，午饭后，尼科尔斯先生在坎特伯雷门抱着阿洛伊修斯，说我把

他留在他的出租车里。

“Well,” I said, “if you can believe all that and you don’t want to be

good, where’s the difficulty about your religion?”

“好吧，”我说，“如果你能相信这一切，你不想做好人，那么你的

宗教有什么困难呢？

“If you can’t see, you can’t.”

“如果你看不见，你就看不见。”

“Well, where?”

“嗯，在哪里？”

“Oh, don’t be a bore, Charles. I want to read about a woman in Hull

who’s been using an instrument.”

“哦，别无聊，查尔斯。我想读到赫尔的一位女士一直在使用乐器

的故事。

“You started the subject. I was just getting interested.”

“你开始了这个话题。我只是开始感兴趣了。

“I’ll never mention it again… thirty-eight other cases were taken into

consideration in sentencing her to six months—golly!”

“我再也不会提了......在判处她六个月徒刑时，还考虑了其他三十八

起案件——天哪！

But he did mention it again, some ten days later, as we were lying on the

roof of the house, sunbathing and watching through a telescope the

Agricultural Show which was in progress in the park below us. It was a

modest two-day show serving the neighboring parishes, and surviving more

as a fair and social gathering than as a center of serious competition. A ring

was marked out in flags, and round it had been pitched half a dozen tents of

varying size; there was a judges’ box and some pens for live-stock; the

largest marquee was for refreshments, and there the farmers congregated in

numbers. Preparations had been going on for a week. “We shall have to

hide,” said Sebastian as the day approached. “My brother will be here. He’s

a big part of the Agricultural Show.” So we lay on the roof under the

balustrade.

但是，大约十天后，当我们躺在房子的屋顶上，晒日光浴，通过望

远镜观看我们脚下公园正在进行的农业展时，他再次提到了这件事。

这是一场为期两天的适度演出，服务于邻近的教区，与其说是作为激

烈竞争的中心，不如说是作为公平和社交聚会而生存的。一个圆环上

挂着旗帜，周围搭起了六顶大小不一的帐篷;有一个法官箱和一些牲畜

围栏;最大的帐篷是茶点，农民们聚集在那里。准备工作已经进行了一

周。“我们将不得不躲起来，”塞巴斯蒂安说，随着这一天的临近。“我

哥哥会在这里。他是农业展的重要组成部分。所以我们躺在栏杆下的

屋顶上。

Brideshead came down by train in the morning and lunched with

Colonel Fender, the agent. I met him for five minutes on his arrival.

Anthony Blanche’s description was peculiarly apt; he had the Flyte face,

carved by an Aztec. We could see him now, through the telescope, moving

awkwardly among the tenants, stopping to greet the judges in their box,

leaning over a pen gazing seriously at the cattle.

布里德斯黑德早上乘火车下来，和特工芬德上校共进午餐。在他到

达时，我见了他五分钟。安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）的描述特

别贴切。他有一张由阿兹特克人雕刻的弗莱特脸。我们现在可以通过

望远镜看到他，笨拙地在房客中间走来走去，停下来向包厢里的法官

打招呼，靠在围栏上认真地凝视着牛群。

“Queer fellow, my brother,” said Sebastian.

“奇怪的家伙，我的兄弟，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“He looks normal enough.”

“他看起来很正常。”

“Oh, but he’s not. If you only knew, he’s much the craziest of us, only it

doesn’t come out at all. He’s all twisted inside. He wanted to be a priest,

you know.”

“哦，但他不是。如果你只知道，他是我们中最疯狂的，只是它根

本没有出来。他的内心都扭曲了。他想成为一名牧师，你知道的。

“I didn’t.”

“我没有。”

“I think he still does. He nearly became a Jesuit, straight from

Stonyhurst. It was awful for mummy. She couldn’t exactly try and stop him,

but of course it was the last thing she wanted. Think what people would

have said—the eldest son; it’s not as if it had been me. And poor papa. The

Church has been enough trouble to him without that happening. There was

a frightful to-do—monks and monsignori running round the house like

mice, and Brideshead just sitting glum and talking about the will of God.

He was the most upset, you see, when papa went abroad—much more than

mummy really. Finally they persuaded him to go to Oxford and think it over

for three years. Now he’s trying to make up his mind. He talks of going into

the Guards and into the House of Commons and of marrying. He doesn’t

know what he wants. I wonder if I should have been like that, if I’d gone to

Stonyhurst. I should have gone, only papa went abroad before I was old

enough, and the first thing he insisted on was my going to Eton.”

“我认为他仍然这样做。他差点成为耶稣会士，直接来自斯托尼赫

斯特。这对妈妈来说太可怕了。她不能完全试图阻止他，但这当然是

她最不想要的。想想人们会怎么说——长子;好像不是我。还有可怜的

爸爸。教会对他来说已经够麻烦了，而没有发生这样的事。有一件可

怕的事情——僧侣和僧侣像老鼠一样在房子里跑来跑去，而布里德斯

黑德只是闷闷不乐地坐着谈论上帝的旨意。你看，当爸爸出国时，他

是最难过的——真的比妈妈还难过。最后，他们说服他去牛津，考虑

了三年。现在他正试图下定决心。他谈到进入卫队和下议院以及结

婚。他不知道自己想要什么。我想知道如果我去了斯托尼赫斯特，我

是否应该这样。我早就该走了，只是爸爸在我还没长大之前就出国

了，他坚持的第一件事就是我去伊顿公学。

“Has your father given up religion?”

“你父亲放弃了宗教信仰吗？”

“Well, he’s had to in a way; he only took to it when he married mummy.

When he went off, he left that behind with the rest of us. You must meet

him. He’s a very nice man.”

“嗯，在某种程度上，他不得不这样做;他只是在娶了妈妈的时候才

接受的。当他离开时，他把这件事留给了我们其他人。你必须见到

他。他是个非常好的人。

Sebastian had never spoken seriously of his father before.

塞巴斯蒂安以前从未认真地谈论过他的父亲。

I said: “It must have upset you all when your father went away.”

我说：“你们父亲走后，你们一定很不高兴。

“All but Cordelia. She was too young. It upset me at the time. Mummy

tried to explain it to the three eldest of us so that we wouldn’t hate papa. I

was the only one who didn’t. I believe she wishes I did. I was always his

favorite. I should be staying with him now, if it wasn’t for this foot. I’m the

only one who goes. Why don’t you come too? You’d like him.”

“除了科迪莉亚。她太年轻了。当时我心烦意乱。媽媽試圖向我們

三個老大解釋，這樣我們就不會恨爸爸了。我是唯一一个没有这样做

的人。我相信她希望我这样做。我一直是他的最爱。如果不是这只

脚，我现在应该和他在一起。我是唯一一个去的人。你为什么不也

来？你会喜欢他的。

A man with a megaphone was shouting the results of the last event in

the field below; his voice came faintly to us.

一个拿着扩音器的男人在下面的田野里大喊最后一场赛事的结果;

他的声音隐隐约约地传来。

“So you see we’re a mixed family religiously. Brideshead and Cordelia

are both fervent Catholics; he’s miserable, she’s bird-happy; Julia and I are

half-heathen; I am happy, I rather think Julia isn’t; mummy is popularly

believed to be a saint and papa is excommunicated—and I wouldn’t know

which of them was happy. Anyway, however you look at it, happiness

doesn’t seem to have much to do with it, and that’s all I want….. I wish I

liked Catholics more.”

“所以你看，我们在宗教上是一个混合家庭。Brideshead 和 Cordelia

都是狂热的天主教徒;他很痛苦，她很快乐;茱莉亚和我是半异教徒;我

很高兴，我宁愿认为朱莉娅不是;人们普遍认为妈妈是圣人，而爸爸则

被逐出教会——我不知道他们中谁是快乐的。不管怎么看，幸福似乎

和它没有太大关系，这就是我想要的.....我希望我更喜欢天主教徒。

“They seem just like other people.”

“他们看起来和其他人一样。”

“My dear Charles, that’s exactly what they’re not—particularly in this

country, where they’re so few. It’s not just that they’re a clique—as a matter

of fact, they’re at least four cliques all blackguarding each other half the

time—but they’ve got an entirely different outlook on life; everything they

think important is different from other people. They try and hide it as much

as they can, but it comes out all the time. It’s quite natural, really, that they

should. But you see it’s difficult for semi-heathens like Julia and me.”

“我亲爱的查尔斯，这正是他们所不具备的——尤其是在这个国

家，他们太少了。这不仅仅是因为他们是一个集团——事实上，他们

至少有四个集团，有一半的时间都在互相保护——但他们的人生观完

全不同;他们认为重要的一切都与其他人不同。他们试图尽可能多地隐

藏它，但它总是出来。这是很自然的，真的，他们应该这样做。但你

看，对于像朱莉娅和我这样的半异教徒来说，这很困难。

We were interrupted in this unusually grave conversation by loud,

childish cries from beyond the chimney-stacks, “Sebastian, Sebastian.”

在这场异常严肃的谈话中，我们被烟囱外响亮而幼稚的呼喊声打断

了，“塞巴斯蒂安，塞巴斯蒂安。

“Good heavens!” said Sebastian, reaching for a blanket. “That sounds

like my sister Cordelia. Cover yourself up.”

“天哪！”塞巴斯蒂安说，伸手去拿毯子。“这听起来像是我的妹妹

科迪莉亚。把自己掩饰起来。

“Where are you?”

“你在哪里？”

There came into view a robust child of ten or eleven; she had the

unmistakable family characteristics, but had them ill-arranged in a frank

and chubby plainness; two thick old-fashioned pigtails hung down her back.

一个十岁或十一岁的健壮孩子映入眼帘;她有明显的家庭特征，但

在坦率而胖乎乎的朴素中安排得不合理;两条粗壮的老式小辫子垂在她

的背上。

“Go away, Cordelia. We’ve got no clothes on.”

“走开，科迪莉亚。我们没有穿衣服。

“Why? You’re quite decent. I guessed you were here. You didn’t know I

was about, did you? I came down with Bridey and stopped to see Francis

Xavier.” (To me) “He’s my pig. Then we had lunch with Colonel Fender

and then the show. Francis Xavier got a special mention. That beast Randal

got first with a mangy animal. Darling Sebastian, I am pleased to see you

again. How’s your poor foot?”

“为什么？你很体面。我猜你在这里。你不知道我在说什么，是

吗？我和布莱迪一起下来，停下来看弗朗西斯·泽维尔。（对我）“他

是我的猪。然后我们和Fender上校共进午餐，然后是表演。弗朗西斯·

泽维尔（Francis Xavier）特别值得一提。那只野兽兰德尔首先得到了

一只肮脏的动物。亲爱的塞巴斯蒂安，我很高兴再次见到你。你那可

怜的脚怎么样了？

“Say how-d’ you-do to Mr. Ryder.”

“对莱德先生说你好吗？”

“Oh, sorry. How d’you do?” All the family charm was in her smile.

“They’re all getting pretty boozy down there, so I came away. I say, who’s

been painting the office? I went in to look for a shooting-stick and saw it.”

“哦，对不起。你好吗？所有的家庭魅力都在她的笑容中。“他们在

那里都喝得酩酊大醉，所以我就走了。我说，谁在粉刷办公室？我进

去找一根射击棒，看到了它。

“Be careful what you say. It’s Mr. Ryder.”

“小心你说的话。是莱德先生。

“But it’s lovely. I say, did you really? You are clever. Why don’t you

both dress and come down? There’s no one about.”

“但它很可爱。我说，你真的吗？你很聪明。你们俩为什么不穿好

衣服下来？没有人。

“Bridey’s sure to bring the judges in.”

“布莱迪肯定会把评委请进来的。”

“But he won’t. I heard him making plans not to. He’s very sour today.

He didn’t want me to have dinner with you, but I fixed that. Come on. I’ll

be in the nursery when you’re fit to be seen.”

“但他不会。我听说他计划不这样做。他今天很酸。他不想让我和

你一起吃饭，但我解决了这个问题。加油。等你好了，我就去托儿

所。

We were a somber little party that evening. Only Cordelia was perfectly

at ease, rejoicing in the food, the lateness of the hour and her brothers’

company. Brideshead was three years older than Sebastian and I, but he

seemed of another generation. He had the physical tricks of his family, and

his smile, when it rarely came, was as lovely as theirs; he spoke, in their

voice, with a gravity and restraint which in my cousin Jasper would have

sounded pompous and false, but in him was plainly unassumed and

unconscious.

那天晚上，我们是一个阴郁的小派对。只有科黛莉亚非常自在，为

食物、时间的迟到和哥哥们的陪伴而欢欣鼓舞。布里德斯黑德比塞巴

斯蒂安和我大三岁，但他似乎是另一代人。他有家人的身体技巧，他

的笑容，当很少出现时，和他们的一样可爱;他用他们的声音说话，带

着一种严肃和克制，在我的表弟贾斯珀看来，这听起来很浮夸和虚

假，但对他来说，显然是无意识的。

“I am so sorry to miss so much of your visit,” he said to me. “You are

being looked after properly? I hope Sebastian is seeing to the wine. Wilcox

is apt to be rather grudging when he is on his own.”

“我很抱歉错过了这么多的访问，”他对我说。“你被妥善照顾了

吗？我希望塞巴斯蒂安能看到葡萄酒。威尔科克斯在独自一人时往往

会相当勉强。

“He’s treated us very liberally.”

“他对我们非常宽容。”

“I am delighted to hear it. You are fond of wine?”

“我很高兴听到它。你喜欢喝酒吗？

“Very.”

“非常。”

“I wish I were. It is such a bond with other men. At Magdalen I tried to

get drunk more than once, but I did not enjoy it. Beer and whisky I find

even less appetizing. Events like this afternoon’s are a torment to me in

consequence.”

“我希望我是。这是与其他男人的纽带。在马格达伦，我不止一次

试图喝醉，但我不喜欢它。啤酒和威士忌我觉得更不开胃。因此，像

今天下午这样的事件对我来说是一种折磨。

“I like wine,” said Cordelia.

“我喜欢葡萄酒，”科迪莉亚说。

“My sister Cordelia’s last report said that she was not only the worst girl

in the school, but the worst there had ever been in the memory of the oldest

nun.”

“我姐姐科迪莉亚的最后一份报告说，她不仅是学校里最糟糕的女

孩，而且是最年长的修女记忆中最糟糕的女孩。

“That’s because I refused to be an Enfant de Marie. Reverend Mother

said that if I didn’t keep my room tidier I couldn’t be one, so I said, well, I

won’t be one, and I don’t believe our Blessed Lady cares two hoots whether

I put my gym shoes on the left or the right of my dancing shoes. Reverend

Mother was livid.”

“那是因为我拒绝成为Enfant de Marie。牧师母亲说，如果我不保持

房间整洁，我就不能成为其中之一，所以我说，好吧，我不会成为其

中之一，我不相信我们的圣母会在乎我把运动鞋放在舞鞋的左边还是

右边。牧师母亲很生气。

“Our Lady cares about obedience.”

“圣母关心服从。”

“Bridey, you mustn’t be pious,” said Sebastian. “We’ve got an atheist

with us.”

“布莱迪，你不能虔诚，”塞巴斯蒂安说。“我们有一个无神论者。

“Agnostic,” I said.

“不可知论者，”我说。

“Really? Is there much of that at your college? There was a certain

amount at Magdalen.”

“真的吗？你的大学里有很多这样的吗？在马格达伦有一定的数

量。

“I really don’t know. I was one long before I went to Oxford.”

“我真的不知道。早在我去牛津之前，我就已经是一年级了。

“It’s everywhere,” said Brideshead.

“它无处不在，”布里德斯黑德说。

Religion seemed an inevitable topic that day. For some time we talked

about the Agricultural Show. Then Brideshead said, “I saw the Bishop in

London last week. You know, he wants to close our chapel.”

那天，宗教似乎是一个不可避免的话题。有一段时间，我们谈到了

农业展。然后布里德斯黑德说：“我上周在伦敦见到了主教。你知道，

他想关闭我们的教堂。

“Oh, he couldn’t,” said Cordelia.

“哦，他不能，”科迪莉亚说。

“I don’t think mummy will let him,” said Sebastian.

“我不认为妈妈会让他，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“It’s too far away,” said Brideshead. “There are a dozen families round

Melstead who can’t get here. He wants to open a mass center there.”

“太远了，”布里德斯黑德说。“梅尔斯特德周围有十几个家庭无法

到达这里。他想在那里开设一个群众中心。

“But what about us?” said Sebastian. “Do we have to drive out on winter

mornings?”

“但是我们呢？”塞巴斯蒂安说。“我们必须在冬天的早晨开车出去

吗？”

“We must have the Blessed Sacrament here,” said Cordelia. “I like

popping in at odd times; so does mummy.”

“我们必须在这里拥有圣体，”科迪莉亚说。“我喜欢在奇怪的时间

突然出现;木乃伊也是。

“So do I,” said Brideshead, “but there are so few of us. It’s not as though

we were old Catholics with everyone on the estate coming to mass. It’ll

have to go sooner or later, perhaps after mummy’s time. The point is

whether it wouldn’t be better to let it go now. You are an artist, Ryder, what

do you think of it aesthetically?”

“我也是，”布里德斯黑德说，“但我们人太少了。这并不是说我们

是老天主教徒，庄园里的每个人都来做弥撒。它迟早要过去，也许在

妈妈的时代之后。关键是现在放手会不会更好。你是一个艺术家，莱

德，你从美学上看它是什么？

“I think it’s beautiful,” said Cordelia with tears in her eyes.

“我觉得它很漂亮，”科迪莉亚眼里含着泪水说。

“Is it Good Art?”

“这是好的艺术吗？”

“Well, I don’t quite know what you mean,” I said warily. “I think it’s a

remarkable example of its period. Probably in eighty years it will be greatly

admired.”

“嗯，我不太明白你的意思，”我小心翼翼地说。“我认为这是那个

时期的一个显着例子。可能在八十年后，它将受到极大的钦佩。

“But surely it can’t be good twenty years ago and good in eighty years,

and not good now?”

“可是，二十年前肯定不可能好，八十年后好，现在不好吗？”

“Well, it may be good now. All I mean is that I don’t happen to like it

much.”

“嗯，现在可能很好。我的意思是，我碰巧不太喜欢它。

“But is there a difference between liking a thing and thinking it good?”

“但是喜欢一件事情和认为它好是有区别的吗？”

“Bridey, don’t be so Jesuitical,” said Sebastian, but I knew that this

disagreement was not a matter of words only, but expressed a deep and

impassable division between us; neither had any understanding of the other,

nor ever could.

“布莱迪，不要那么耶稣会，”塞巴斯蒂安说，但我知道这种分歧不

仅仅是言语问题，而是表达了我们之间深刻而不可逾越的分歧;两人都

对对方没有任何了解，也永远无法理解。

“Isn’t that just the distinction you made about wine?”

“这不就是你对葡萄酒的区分吗？”

“No. I like and think good the end to which wine is sometimes the

means—the promotion of sympathy between man and man. But in my own

case it does not achieve that end, so I neither like it nor think it good for

me.”

“不。我喜欢并认为葡萄酒有时是达到目的的目的——促进人与人

之间的同情。但就我自己而言，它并没有达到这个目的，所以我既不

喜欢它，也不认为它对我有好处。

“Bridey, do stop.”

“新娘，停下。”

“I’m sorry,” he said, “I thought it rather an interesting point.”

“对不起，”他说，“我觉得这是一个很有意思的观点。

“Thank God I went to Eton,” said Sebastian.

“感谢上帝，我去了伊顿公学，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

After dinner Brideshead said: “I’m afraid I must take Sebastian away for

half an hour. I shall be busy all day tomorrow, and I’m off immediately after

the show. I’ve a lot of papers for father to sign. Sebastian must take them

out and explain them to him. It’s time you were in bed, Cordelia.”

晚饭后，布里德斯黑德说：“恐怕我必须带塞巴斯蒂安离开半个小

时。明天我会忙一整天，演出结束后我马上就下班了。我有很多文件

要爸爸签字。塞巴斯蒂安必须把它们拿出来向他解释。你该上床睡觉

了，科迪莉亚。

“Must digest first,” she said. “I’m not used to gorging like this at night.

I’ll talk to Charles.”

“必须先消化，”她说。“我不习惯晚上这样狼吞虎咽。我会和查尔

斯谈谈。

“ ‘Charles’?” said Sebastian. “ ‘Charles’? ‘Mr. Ryder’ to you, child.”

“'查尔斯'？”塞巴斯蒂安说。“'查尔斯'？莱德先生，孩子。

“Come on, Charles.”

“来吧，查尔斯。”

When we were alone she said: “Are you really an agnostic?”

当我们单独相处时，她说：“你真的是一个不可知论者吗？

“Does your family always talk about religion all the time?”

“你的家人总是在谈论宗教吗？”

“Not all the time. It’s a subject that just comes up naturally, doesn’t it?”

“并非一直如此。这是一个自然而然出现的话题，不是吗？

“Does it? It never has with me before.”

“是吗？它以前从未与我同在。

“Then perhaps you are an agnostic. I’ll pray for you.”

“那么也许你是一个不可知论者。我会为你祈祷。

“That’s very kind of you.”

“你真是太好了。”

“I can’t spare you a whole rosary you know. Just a decade. I’ve got such

a long list of people. I take them in order and they get a decade about once a

week.”

“我不能饶你一整串念珠，你知道的。仅仅十年。我有一长串人。

我把它们按顺序排列，它们大约每周一次。

“I’m sure it’s more than I deserve.”

“我敢肯定，这比我应得的要多。”

“Oh, I’ve got some harder cases than you. Lloyd George and the Kaiser

and Olive Banks.”

“哦，我有一些比你更难的案子。劳埃德·乔治（Lloyd George）和

凯撒银行（Kaiser and Olive Banks）。

“Who is she?”

“她是谁？”

“She was bunked from the convent last term. I don’t quite know what

for. Reverend Mother found something she’d been writing. D’you know, if

you weren’t an agnostic, I should ask you for five shillings to buy a black

goddaughter.”

“上学期她被从修道院里挤出来了。我不太清楚为什么。牧师母亲

发现了她一直在写的东西。你知道，如果你不是不可知论者，我应该

向你要五先令买一个黑人教女。

“Nothing will surprise me about your religion.”

“关于你的宗教，没有什么会让我感到惊讶的。”

“It’s a new thing a missionary priest started last term. You send five bob

to some nuns in Africa and they christen a baby and name her after you.

I’ve got six black Cordelias already. Isn’t it lovely?”

“这是一位传教士在上学期开始的新事物。你把五个鲍勃寄给非洲

的一些修女，她们给一个婴儿洗礼，并以你的名字命名。我已经有六

只黑色的Cordelias了。是不是很可爱？

When Brideshead and Sebastian returned, Cordelia was sent to bed.

Brideshead began again on our discussion.

当布里德斯黑德和塞巴斯蒂安回来时，科迪莉亚被送到床上睡觉。

Brideshead再次开始了我们的讨论。

“Of course, you are right really,” he said. “You take art as a means not as

an end. That is strict theology, but it’s unusual to find an agnostic believing

it.”

“当然，你真的是对的，”他说。“你把艺术当作一种手段，而不是

目的。这是严格的神学，但找到一个不可知论者相信它是不寻常的。

“Cordelia has promised to pray for me,” I said.

“科黛莉亚答应为我祈祷，”我说。

“She made a novena for her pig,” said Sebastian.

“她为她的猪做了一个诺维娜，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“You know all this is very puzzling to me,” I said.

“你知道这一切对我来说非常令人费解，”我说。

“I think we’re causing scandal,” said Brideshead.

“我认为我们正在制造丑闻，”布里德斯黑德说。

That night I began to realize how little I really knew of Sebastian, and to

understand why he had always sought to keep me apart from the rest of his

life. He was like a friend made on board ship, on the high seas; now we had

come to his home port.

那天晚上，我开始意识到我对塞巴斯蒂安的了解是多么的少，也明

白了为什么他总是试图让我与他的余生分开。他就像在船上，在公海

上结识的朋友;现在我们来到了他的母港。

Brideshead and Cordelia went away; the tents were struck on the show

ground, the flags uprooted; the trampled grass began to regain its color; the

month that had started in leisurely fashion came swiftly to its end. Sebastian

walked without a stick now and had forgotten his injury.

布里德斯黑德和科迪莉亚走了;帐篷在表演场上被击中，旗帜被连根拔

起;被践踏的草开始恢复颜色;悠闲地开始的一个月很快就结束了。塞

巴斯蒂安现在走路时没有拐杖，已经忘记了自己的伤势。

“I think you’d better come with me to Venice,” he said.

“我想你最好和我一起去威尼斯，”他说。

“No money.”

“没钱。”

“I thought of that. We live on papa when we get there. The lawyers pay

my fare—first class and sleeper. We can both travel third for that.”

“我想到了。当我们到达那里时，我们住在爸爸身上。律师们付了

我的车费——头等舱和卧铺车费。我们俩都可以为此旅行第三。

And so we went; first by the long, cheap sea-crossing to Dunkirk, sitting

all night on deck under a clear sky, watching the gray dawn break over the

sand dunes; then to Paris, on wooden seats, where we drove to the Lotti,

had baths and shaved, lunched at Foyot’s, which was hot and half-empty,

loitered sleepily among the shops and sat long in a café waiting till the time

of our train; then in the warm, dusty evening to the Gare de Lyon, to the

slow train south, again the wooden seats, a carriage full of the poor, visiting

their families—travelling, as the poor do in Northern countries, with a

multitude of small bundles and an air of patient submission to authority—

and sailors returning from leave. We slept fitfully, jolting and stopping,

changed once in the night, slept again and awoke in an empty carriage, with

pine woods passing the windows and the distant view of mountain peaks.

New uniforms at the frontier, coffee and bread at the station buffet, people

round us of Southern grace and gaiety; on again into the plains, conifers

changing to vine and olive, a change of trains at Milan; garlic sausage,

bread, and a flask of Orvieto bought from a trolley (we had spent all our

money save for a few francs, in Paris); the sun mounted high and the

country glowed with heat; the carriage filled with peasants, ebbing and

flowing at each station, the smell of garlic was overwhelming in the hot

carriage. At last in the evening we arrived at Venice.

于是我们去了;首先是漫长而廉价的海上穿越敦刻尔克，在晴朗的

天空下整夜坐在甲板上，看着灰色的黎明在沙丘上破晓;然后到巴黎，

坐在木椅上，我们开车去洛蒂，洗澡和刮胡子，在Foyot's吃午饭，那

里很热，半空，睡眼惺忪地在商店里徘徊，在咖啡馆里坐了很久，等

到我们的火车时间;然后在温暖、尘土飞扬的夜晚，到里昂火车站，到

缓慢的火车向南，又是木制座椅，一辆满载穷人的车厢，探望他们的

家人——就像北方国家的穷人一样，带着许多小包和耐心地服从权威

的气氛——以及休假归来的水手。我们睡得很香，摇摇晃晃，停下

来，晚上换一次，又睡了一次，在一辆空荡荡的马车里醒来，窗外是

松树林，远处是山峰。边境的新制服，车站自助餐的咖啡和面包，南

方优雅和欢乐的人们围绕着我们;再次进入平原，针叶树换成藤蔓和橄

榄树，在米兰换火车;大蒜香肠、面包和一瓶从手推车上买来的奥维多

酒（我们在巴黎花光了所有的钱，只剩下几法郎）;太阳高高升起，整

个国家都热气腾腾;车厢里挤满了农民，每个车站都起起伏伏，大蒜的

香味在热腾腾的车厢里弥漫开来。傍晚时分，我们终于到达了威尼

斯。

A somber figure was there to meet us. “Papa’s valet, Plender.”

一个阴沉的身影在那里迎接我们。“爸爸的贴身男仆，普兰德。”

“I met the express,” said Plender. “His Lordship thought you must have

looked up the train wrong. This seemed only to come from Milan.”

“我遇到了快递，”普兰德说。“陛下认为您一定是看错了火车。这

似乎只来自米兰。

“We travelled third.”

“我们排在第三位。”

Plender tittered politely. “I have the gondola here. I shall follow with the

luggage in the vaporetto. His Lordship has gone to the Lido. He was not

sure he would be home before you—that was when we expected you on the

Express. He should be there by now.”

Plender礼貌地嘟囔着。“我这里有缆车。我会带着行李在汽艇上跟

着。陛下已经去了丽都。他不确定自己会不会比你先到家——那是我

们期待你在快车上的时候。他现在应该在那里了。

He led us to the waiting boat. The gondoliers wore green and white

livery and silver plaques on their chests; they smiled and bowed.

他把我们带到了等候的船上。船夫们身穿绿白相间的制服，胸前挂

着银色牌匾;他们微笑着鞠躬。

“Palazzo. Pronto.”

“

宫殿。准备好了。

“Sì, signore Plender.”

“

是的，普兰德先生。

”

And we floated away.

然后我们飘走了。

“You’ve been here before?”

“你以前来过这里？”

“No.”

“没有。”

“I came once before—from the sea. This is the way to arrive.”

“我以前来过一次——从海上来的。这是到达的路。

“Ecco ci siamo, signori.”

“

我们来了，先生们。

”

The palace was a little less than it sounded, a narrow Palladian façade,

mossy steps, a dark archway of rusticated stone. One boatman leapt ashore,

made fast to the post, rang the bell; the other stood on the prow keeping the

craft in to the steps. The doors opened; a man in rather raffish summer

livery of striped linen led us up the stairs from shadow into light; the piano

nobile was in full sunshine, ablaze with frescoes of the school of Tintoretto.

这座宫殿比听起来要少一点，狭窄的帕拉第奥式外墙，长满苔藓的

台阶，一个由质朴的石头制成的黑暗拱门。一个船夫跳上岸，迅速赶

到柱子上，敲响了铃铛;另一个站在船头，让飞船保持在台阶上。门开

了;一个穿着条纹亚麻布夏装的男人带领我们从阴影到光明的楼梯上;

钢琴贵族在阳光明媚的阳光下，点燃了丁托列托学校的壁画。

Our rooms were on the floor above, reached by a precipitous marble

staircase; they were shuttered against the afternoon sun; the butler threw

them open and we looked out on the grand canal; the beds had mosquito

nets.

我们的房间在上面的楼层，通过一个陡峭的大理石楼梯到达;它们

在午后的阳光下关上了;管家把它们打开，我们眺望着大运河;床上有

蚊帐。

“Mostica not now.”

“莫斯蒂卡，现在不行。”

There was a little bulbous press in each room, a misty, gilt-framed

mirror, and no other furniture. The floor was of bare marble slabs.

每个房间里都有一台小小的球形压榨机，一面朦胧的镀金镜子，没

有其他家具。地板是光秃秃的大理石板。

“A bit bleak?” asked Sebastian.

“有点凄凉吗？”塞巴斯蒂安问。

“Bleak? Look at that.” I led him again to the window and the

incomparable pageant below and about us.

“凄凉？瞧瞧。我又把他带到了窗前，看到了下面和我们周围无与

伦比的盛会。

“No, you couldn’t call it bleak.”

“不，你不能说它很凄凉。”

A tremendous explosion drew us next door. We found a bathroom which

seemed to have been built in a chimney. There was no ceiling; instead the

walls ran straight through the floor above to the open sky. The butler was

almost invisible in the steam of an antiquated geyser. There was an

overpowering smell of gas and a tiny trickle of cold water.

一场巨大的爆炸把我们拉到了隔壁。我们发现了一个浴室，似乎是

建在烟囱里的。没有上限;取而代之的是，墙壁直接穿过上面的地板，

一直延伸到开阔的天空。管家在陈旧间歇泉的蒸汽中几乎看不见。有

一股浓烈的煤气味和一小滴冷水。

“No good.”

“不好。”

“Sì, Sì, subito, signori.”

“

是的，是的，马上，先生们。

”

The butler ran to the top of the staircase and began to shout down it; a

female voice, more strident than his, answered. Sebastian and I returned to

the spectacle below our windows. Presently the argument came to an end

and a woman and child appeared, who smiled at us, scowled at the butler

and put on Sebastian’s press a silver basin and ewer of boiling water. The

butler meanwhile unpacked and folded our clothes and, lapsing into Italian,

told us of the unrecognized merits of the geyser, until suddenly cocking his

head sideways he became alert, said “Il marchese,” and darted downstairs.

管家跑到楼梯顶端，开始大声喊叫;一个比他更尖锐的女声回答

道。塞巴斯蒂安和我回到了窗下的景象。这时，争吵结束了，一个女

人和孩子出现了，他们对我们微笑，对管家皱着眉头，给塞巴斯蒂安

的压榨机上放了一个银盆和一壶开水。与此同时，管家打开我们的行

李，把我们的衣服叠好，用意大利语告诉我们间歇泉的不为人知的优

点，直到他突然把头歪向一边，变得警觉起来，说了句“Il marchese”，

然后飞奔下楼。

“We’d better look respectable before meeting papa,” said Sebastian. “We

needn’t dress. I gather he’s alone at the moment.”

“在见到爸爸之前，我们最好看起来很体面，”塞巴斯蒂安说。“我

们不需要穿衣服。我发现他现在独自一人。

I was full of curiosity to meet Lord Marchmain. When I did so I was

first struck by his normality, which, as I saw more of him, I found to be

studied. It was as though he were conscious of a Byronic aura, which he

considered to be in bad taste and was at pains to suppress. He was standing

on the balcony of the saloon and, as he turned to greet us, his face was in

deep shadow. I was aware only of a tall and upright figure.

我满怀好奇地想见到马奇曼勋爵。当我这样做时，我首先被他的正

常所震撼，随着我看到他的更多，我发现这是被研究的。就好像他意

识到了一种拜伦式的光环，他认为这种光环很糟糕，并且极力压制。

他站在沙龙的阳台上，当他转身向我们打招呼时，他的脸被深深的阴

影笼罩着。我只知道一个高大挺拔的身影。

“Darling papa,” said Sebastian, “how young you are looking!”

“亲爱的爸爸，”塞巴斯蒂安说，“你看起来多么年轻啊！

He kissed Lord Marchmain on the cheek and I, who had not kissed my

father since I left the nursery, stood shyly behind him.

他亲吻了马奇曼勋爵的脸颊，而自从我离开托儿所以来就没有亲吻

过父亲的我害羞地站在他身后。

“This is Charles. Don’t you think my father very handsome, Charles?”

“这是查尔斯。你不觉得我父亲很帅吗，查尔斯？”

Lord Marchmain shook my hand.

马奇曼勋爵握了握我的手。

“Whoever looked up your train,” he said—and his voice also was

Sebastian’s—“made a bêtise. There’s no such one.”

“谁看过你的火车，”他说——他的声音也是塞巴斯蒂安的声音——

“做了一个bêtise。没有这样的人。

“We came on it.”

“我们来了。”

“You can’t have. There was only a slow train from Milan at that time. I

was at the Lido. I have taken to playing tennis there with the professional in

the early evening. It is the only time of day when it is not too hot. I hope

you boys will be fairly comfortable upstairs. This house seems to have been

designed for the comfort of only one person, and I am that one. I have a

room the size of this and a very decent dressing-room. Cara has taken

possession of the other sizeable room.”

“你不能有。当时只有一列从米兰开来的慢火车。我在丽都。我已

经习惯了在傍晚和职业球员一起打网球。这是一天中唯一不太热的时

间。我希望你们这些男孩在楼上会很舒服。这所房子似乎只为一个人

的舒适而设计，而我就是那个人。我有一个这么大的房间和一个非常

体面的更衣室。卡拉已经占据了另一个相当大的房间。

I was fascinated to hear him speak of his mistress so simply and

casually; later I suspected that it was done for effect, for me.

听他如此简单随意地谈论他的情妇，我感到很着迷;后来我怀疑这

样做是为了效果，为了我。

“How is she?”

“她怎么样了？”

“Cara? Well, I hope. She will be back with us tomorrow. She is visiting

some American friends at a villa on the Brenta canal. Where shall we dine?

We might go to the Luna, but it is filling up with English now. Would you

be too dull at home? Cara is sure to want to go out tomorrow, and the cook

here is really quite excellent.”

“卡拉？好吧，我希望。她明天会和我们一起回来。她正在布伦塔

运河上的一栋别墅里拜访一些美国朋友。我们在哪里用餐？我们可能

会去月神，但现在它已经充满了英语。你在家里会不会太沉闷了？卡

拉明天肯定想出去，这里的厨师真的很棒。

He had moved away from the window and now stood in the full evening

sunlight, with the red damask of the walls behind him. It was a noble face, a

controlled one, just, it seemed, as he planned it to be; slightly weary,

slightly sardonic, slightly voluptuous. He seemed in the prime of life; it was

odd to think that he was only a few years younger than my father.

他已经离开了窗户，现在站在傍晚的阳光下，身后是墙壁上的红色

锦缎。那是一张高贵的脸，一张被控制的脸，似乎只是，正如他所计

划的那样;略带疲惫，略带讽刺，略带妖娆。他似乎正值壮年;想到他

只比我父亲小几岁，真是奇怪。

We dined at a marble table in the windows; everything was either of

marble, or velvet, or dull, gilt gesso in this house. Lord Marchmain said,

“And how do you plan your time here? Bathing or sight-seeing?”

我们在窗户上的大理石桌上用餐;在这所房子里，一切都是大理石

的，或者是天鹅绒的，或者是沉闷的镀金石膏。马奇曼勋爵说：“那你

在这里的时间是怎么计划的呢？洗澡还是观光？

“Some sight-seeing, anyway,” I said.

“不管怎样，还是去观光吧，”我说。

“Cara will like that—she, as Sebastian will have told you, is your

hostess here. You can’t do both, you know. Once you go to the Lido there is

no escaping—you play back-gammon, you get caught at the bar, you get

stupefied by the sun. Stick to the churches.”

“卡拉会喜欢的——正如塞巴斯蒂安告诉你的那样，她是你在这里

的女主人。你知道，你不能两者兼而有之。一旦你去了丽都，就没有

办法逃脱了——你玩双陆棋，你在酒吧被抓，你被太阳吓晕了。坚持

教会。

“Charles is very keen on painting,” said Sebastian.

“查尔斯非常热衷于绘画，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“Yes?” I noticed the hint of deep boredom which I knew so well in my

own father. “Yes? Any particular Venetian painter?”

“是吗？”我注意到一丝深深的无聊，这是我在自己的父亲身上非常

熟悉的。“是吗？有没有特别的威尼斯画家？

“Bellini,” I answered rather wildly.

“贝利尼，”我相当疯狂地回答。

“Yes? Which?”

“是吗？哪个？

“I’m afraid I didn’t know there were two of them.”

“恐怕我不知道有两个人。”

“Three to be precise. You will find that in the great ages painting was

very much a family business. How did you leave England?”

“准确地说是三个。你会发现，在伟大的时代，绘画在很大程度上

是一项家族企业。你是怎么离开英国的？

“It has been lovely,” said Sebastian.

“这很可爱，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“Was it? Was it? It has been my tragedy that I abominate the English

countryside. I suppose it is a disgraceful thing to inherit great

responsibilities and to be entirely indifferent to them. I am all the Socialists

would have me be, and a great stumbling-block to my own party. Well, my

elder son will change all that, I’ve no doubt, if they leave him anything to

inherit…. Why, I wonder, are Italian sweets always thought to be so good?

There was always an Italian pastry-cook at Brideshead until my father’s

day. He had an Austrian, so much better. And now I suppose there is some

British matron with beefy forearms.”

“是吗？是吗？我憎恶英国乡村是我的悲剧。我想，继承重大责任

而对它们完全漠不关心是一件可耻的事情。我是社会党人希望我成为

的样子，也是我自己党的一大绊脚石。好吧，我的大儿子会改变这一

切，我毫不怀疑，如果他们给他留下什么遗产......我想知道，为什么意

大利糖果总是被认为这么好吃？在我父亲的那一天之前，布里德斯黑

德总是有一位意大利糕点师。他有一个奥地利人，好多了。现在我想

有一些英国女主人有着结实的前臂。

After dinner we left the palace by the street door and walked through a

maze of bridges and squares and alleys, to Florian’s for coffee, and watched

the grave crowds crossing and recrossing under the campanile. “There is

nothing quite like a Venetian crowd,” said Lord Marchmain. “The city is

crawling with Anarchists, but an American woman tried to sit here the other

night with bare shoulders and they drove her away by coming to stare at

her, quite silently; they were like circling gulls coming back and back to

her, until she left. Our countrymen are much less dignified when they

attempt to express moral disapproval.”

晚饭后，我们从街边的门口离开了宫殿，穿过迷宫般的桥梁、广场

和小巷，到弗洛里安的咖啡馆喝咖啡，看着坟墓的人群在钟楼下穿过

和重新穿过。“没有什么能比得上威尼斯的人群了，”马奇曼勋爵说。

“这个城市到处都是无政府主义者，但有一天晚上，一个美国妇女试图

光着肩膀坐在这里，他们默默地盯着她看，把她赶走了;他们就像盘旋

的海鸥，来回回到她身边，直到她离开。当我们的同胞试图表达道德

上的不满时，他们就不那么有尊严了。

An English party had just then come from the waterfront, made for a

table near us, and then suddenly moved to the other side, where they looked

askance at us and talked with their heads close together. “That is a man and

his wife I used to know when I was in politics. A prominent member of

your church, Sebastian.”

这时，一个英国人刚从海边走过来，在我们附近摆了一张桌子，然

后突然走到另一边，他们疑惑地看着我们，把头靠在一起说话。“那是

一个男人和他的妻子，当我从政时，我曾经认识。塞巴斯蒂安，你教

会的杰出成员。

As we went up to bed that night Sebastian said: “He’s rather a poppet,

isn’t he?”

那天晚上我们上床睡觉时，塞巴斯蒂安说：“他更像是一个提升

器，不是吗？

Lord Marchmain’s mistress arrived next day. I was nineteen years old and

completely ignorant of women. I could not with any certainty recognize a

prostitute in the streets. I was therefore not indifferent to the fact of living

under the roof of an adulterous couple, but I was old enough to hide my

interest. Lord Marchmain’s mistress, therefore, found me with a multitude

of conflicting expectations about her, all of which were, for the moment,

disappointed by her appearance. She was not a voluptuous Toulouse-

Lautrec odalisque; she was not a “little bit of fluff”; she was a middle-aged,

well-preserved, well-dressed, well-mannered woman such as I had seen in

countless public places and occasionally met. Nor did she seem marked by

any social stigma. On the day of her arrival we lunched at the Lido, where

she was greeted at almost every table.

第二天，马奇曼勋爵的情妇来了。我当时十九岁，对女人一无所知。

我无法肯定地认出街上的。因此，我对生活在一对通妇的屋檐下的事

实并不漠不关心，但我的年龄足以隐藏我的兴趣。因此，马奇曼勋爵

的情妇发现我对她抱有许多相互矛盾的期望，所有这些期望暂时都对

她的外表感到失望。她不是一个性感的图卢兹-劳特累克 odalisque;她

不是“一点点绒毛”;她是一个中年人，保养得很好，衣着得体，彬彬有

礼，就像我在无数公共场所见过的，偶尔也会见到的。她似乎也没有

任何社会耻辱。在她抵达的那天，我们在丽都酒店共进午餐，几乎每

张桌子都欢迎她。

“Vittoria Corombona has asked us all to her ball on Saturday.”

“维多利亚·科伦博纳（Vittoria Corombona）邀请我们所有人参加周

六的舞会。

“It is very kind of her. You know I do not dance,” said Lord Marchmain.

“她非常善良。你知道我不跳舞，“马奇曼勋爵说。

“But for the boys? It is a thing to be seen—the Corombona palace lit up

for the ball. One does not know how many such balls there will be in the

future.”

“但是对于男孩来说呢？这是一件值得一看的事情——科伦博纳宫

为舞会点亮了灯光。人们不知道将来会有多少这样的球。

“The boys can do as they like. We must refuse.”

“男孩们可以随心所欲。我们必须拒绝。

“And I have asked Mrs. Hacking Brunner to luncheon. She has a

charming daughter. Sebastian and his friend will like her.”

“我已经请哈金·布伦纳夫人共进午餐。她有一个迷人的女儿。塞巴

斯蒂安和他的朋友会喜欢她的。

“Sebastian and his friend are more interested in Bellini than heiresses.”

“塞巴斯蒂安和他的朋友对贝利尼比女继承人更感兴趣。

“But that is what I have always wished,” said Cara, changing her point

of attack adroitly. “I have been here more times than I can count and Alex

has not once let me inside San Marco even. We will become tourists, yes?”

“但这是我一直希望的，”卡拉说，巧妙地改变了她的攻击点。“我

来这里的次数多得数不清，亚历克斯甚至没有让我进入圣马可。我们

会成为游客，是吗？

We became tourists; Cara enlisted as guide a midget Venetian nobleman

to whom all doors were open, and with him at her side and a guide book in

her hand, she came with us, flagging sometimes but never giving up, a neat,

prosaic figure amid the immense splendors of the place.

我们成了游客;卡拉请了一位侏儒威尼斯贵族作为向导，所有的门

都向他敞开，他站在她身边，手里拿着一本指南书，她和我们一起来

了，有时萎靡不振，但从不放弃，在这个地方的巨大辉煌中，她是一

个整洁、平淡无奇的身影。

The fortnight at Venice passed quickly and sweetly—perhaps too

sweetly; I was drowning in honey, stingless. On some days life kept pace

with the gondola, as we nosed through the side-canals and the boatman

uttered his plaintive musical bird-cry of warning; on other days with the

speed-boat bouncing over the lagoon in a stream of sun-lit foam; it left a

confused memory of fierce sunlight on the sands and cool, marble interiors;

of water everywhere, lapping on smooth stone, reflected in a dapple of light

on painted ceilings; of a night at the Corombona palace such as Byron

might have known, and another Byronic night fishing for scampi in the

shallows of Chioggia, the phosphorescent wake of the little ship, the lantern

swinging in the prow, and the net coming up full of weed and sand and

floundering fishes; of melon and prosciutto on the balcony in the cool of the

morning; of hot cheese sandwiches and champagne cocktails at Harry’s bar.

在威尼斯的两周过得很快，很甜蜜——也许太甜蜜了;我淹没在蜂

蜜中，没有刺痛。在某些日子里，生活与贡多拉保持同步，当我们穿

过侧渠时，船夫发出了他哀怨的音乐鸟鸣警告;在其他日子里，快艇在

阳光照射的泡沫流中在泻湖上弹跳;它留下了对沙滩上猛烈阳光和凉爽

大理石内饰的混乱记忆;到处都是水，拍打在光滑的石头上，反射在彩

绘天花板上的斑驳光线中;在科伦博纳宫度过一个夜晚，就像拜伦可能

知道的那样，另一个拜伦式的夜晚在基奥贾的浅滩上钓鲈鱼，小船的

磷光尾迹，船头摆动的灯笼，以及满是杂草、沙子和挣扎的鱼的网;清

晨凉爽时，阳台上有甜瓜和意大利熏火腿;哈利酒吧的热奶酪三明治和

香槟鸡尾酒。

I remember Sebastian looking up at the Colleoni statue and saying, “It’s

rather sad to think that whatever happens you and I can never possibly get

involved in a war.”

我记得塞巴斯蒂安抬头看着科莱奥尼雕像说：“想到无论发生什

么，你和我都不可能卷入战争，这真是太可悲了。

I remember most particularly one conversation towards the end of my

visit.

我特别记得在我访问结束时的一次谈话。

Sebastian had gone to play tennis with his father and Cara at last

admitted to fatigue. We sat in the late afternoon at the windows overlooking

the Grand Canal, she on the sofa with a piece of needlework, I in an

armchair, idle. It was the first time we had been alone together.

塞巴斯蒂安和父亲一起去打网球，卡拉终于承认自己很疲劳。傍晚

时分，我们坐在窗前俯瞰大运河，她坐在沙发上做着针线活，我坐在

扶手椅上，无所事事。这是我们第一次单独在一起。

“I think you are very fond of Sebastian,” she said.

“我认为你非常喜欢塞巴斯蒂安，”她说。

“Why, certainly.”

“为什么，当然。”

“I know of these romantic friendships of the English and the Germans.

They are not Latin. I think they are very good if they do not go on too

long.”

“我知道英国人和德国人的浪漫友谊。他们不是拉丁语。我认为如

果他们不持续太久，他们会非常好。

She was so composed and matter-of-fact that I could not take her amiss,

but I failed to find an answer. She seemed not to expect one but continued

stitching, pausing sometimes to match the silk from a work-bag at her side.

她是如此沉着和实事求是，以至于我不能把她弄错，但我没有找到

答案。她似乎没想到会这样，而是继续缝合，有时停下来配合她身边

工作包里的丝绸。

“It is a kind of love that comes to children before they know its

meaning. In England it comes when you are almost men; I think I like that.

It is better to have that kind of love for another boy than for a girl. Alex you

see had it for a girl, for his wife. Do you think he loves me?”

“这是一种爱，在孩子们知道它的意义之前就来到了他们身上。在

英国，当你几乎是男人时，它就会到来;我想我喜欢这样。对另一个男

孩有这样的爱比对一个女孩有这样的爱要好。亚历克斯，你看，它是

为了一个女孩，为了他的妻子。你以为他爱我吗？

“Really, Cara, you ask the most embarrassing questions. How should I

know? I assume…”

“真的，卡拉，你问了最尴尬的问题。我怎么知道？我想......”

“He does not. But not the littlest piece. Then why does he stay with me?

I will tell you; because I protect him from Lady Marchmain. He hates her;

but you can have no conception how he hates her. You would think him so

calm and English—the milord, rather blasé, all passion dead, wishing to be

comfortable and not to be worried, following the sun, with me to look after

that one thing that no man can do for himself. My friend, he is a volcano of

hate. He cannot breathe the same air as she. He will not set foot in England

because it is her home; he can scarcely be happy with Sebastian because he

is her son. But Sebastian hates her too.”

“他没有。但不是最小的一块。那他为什么要和我在一起呢？我会

告诉你;因为我保护他免受马奇曼夫人的伤害。他恨她;但你无法想象

他是如何讨厌她的。你会觉得他那么冷静，那么英式——那位先生，

相当平淡无奇，满怀激情，希望舒适，不担心，追随太阳，和我一起

照顾那件没有人能为自己做的事。我的朋友，他是一座仇恨的火山。

他不能呼吸和她一样的空气。他不会踏足英国，因为那是她的家;他几

乎不能和塞巴斯蒂安在一起，因为他是她的儿子。但塞巴斯蒂安也讨

厌她。

“I’m sure you’re wrong there.”

“我确定你错了。”

“He may not admit it to you. He may not admit it to himself; they are

full of hate—hate of themselves. Alex and his family…. Why do you think

he will never go into Society?”

“他可能不会向你承认。他可能不承认自己;他们充满了憎恨——憎

恨自己。亚历克斯和他的家人......你为什么认为他永远不会进入社会？

“I always thought people had turned against him.”

“我一直以为人们已经反对他了。

“My dear boy, you are very young. People turn against a handsome,

clever, wealthy man like Alex? Never in your life. It is he who has driven

them away. Even now they come back again and again to be snubbed and

laughed at. And all for Lady Marchmain. He will not touch a hand which

may have touched hers. When we have guests I see him thinking, “Have

they perhaps just come from Brideshead? Are they on their way to

Marchmain House? Will they speak of me to my wife? Are they a link

between me and her whom I hate?” But, seriously, with my heart, that is

how he thinks. He is mad. And how has she deserved all this hate? She has

done nothing except to be loved by someone who was not grown up. I have

never met Lady Marchmain; I have seen her once only; but if you live with

a man you come to know the other woman he has loved. I know Lady

Marchmain very well. She is a good and simple woman who has been loved

in the wrong way.

“我亲爱的孩子，你还很年轻。人们反对像亚历克斯这样英俊、聪

明、富有的人？你这辈子从来没有。是他把他们赶走了。即使是现

在，他们一次又一次地回来被冷落和嘲笑。这一切都是为了马奇曼夫

人。他不会碰到可能碰过她的手。当我们有客人时，我看到他在想，

“他们可能刚从布里德斯黑德来吗？他们正在去Marchmain House的路

上吗？他们会对我的妻子说起我吗？他们是我和我讨厌的她之间的纽

带吗？但是，说真的，在我的心里，他就是这么想的。他疯了。她怎

么配得上这一切仇恨？她什么也没做，只是为了被一个没有长大的人

爱。我从未见过马奇曼夫人;我只见过她一次;但是，如果你和一个男

人住在一起，你就会认识他所爱的另一个女人。我非常了解马奇曼夫

人。她是一个善良而单纯的女人，却被错误地爱着。

“When people hate with all that energy, it is something in themselves

they are hating. Alex is hating all the illusions of boyhood—innocence,

God, hope. Poor Lady Marchmain has to bear all that. A woman has not all

these ways of loving.

“当人们憎恨所有这些能量时，他们自己就憎恨了。亚历克斯憎恨

童年的所有幻想——纯真、上帝、希望。可怜的马奇曼夫人必须承受

这一切。一个女人没有所有这些爱的方式。

“Now Alex is very fond of me and I protect him from his own

innocence. We are comfortable.

“现在亚历克斯非常喜欢我，我保护他免受自己的清白。我们很舒

服。

“Sebastian is in love with his own childhood. That will make him very

unhappy. His teddy-bear, his nanny… and he is nineteen years old…”

“塞巴斯蒂安爱上了自己的童年。那会让他很不开心。他的泰迪

熊，他的保姆......他已经十九岁了......”

She stirred on her sofa, shifting her weight so that she could look down

at the passing boats, and said in fond, mocking tones: “How good it is to sit

in the shade and talk of love,” and then added with a sudden swoop to earth,

“Sebastian drinks too much.”

她在沙发上晃了晃，挪了挪身心，这样她就可以俯视过往的船只，

用亲切的、嘲弄的语气说：“坐在树荫下谈论爱情是多么好啊，”然后

突然猛地补充道，“塞巴斯蒂安喝得太多了。

“I suppose we both do.”

“我想我们俩都知道。”

“With you it does not matter. I have watched you together. With

Sebastian it is different. He will be a drunkard if someone does not come to

stop him. I have known so many. Alex was nearly a drunkard when he met

me; it is in the blood. I see it in the way Sebastian drinks. It is not your

way.”

“和你在一起没关系。我曾一起看着你们。对于塞巴斯蒂安来说，

情况就不同了。如果有人不来阻止他，他将是一个酒鬼。我认识很多

人。亚历克斯见到我时几乎是个酒鬼;它在血液中。我从塞巴斯蒂安喝

酒的方式中看到了这一点。这不是你的方式。

We arrived in London on the day before term began. On the way from

Charing Cross I dropped Sebastian in the forecourt of his mother’s house;

“Here is ‘Marchers,’ ” he said with a sigh which meant the end of a holiday.

“I won’t ask you in, the place is probably full of my family. We’ll meet at

Oxford”; I drove across the park to my home.

我们在学期开始的前一天到达伦敦。在从查令十字街回来的路上，我

把塞巴斯蒂安放在他母亲家的前院;“这里是'游行者'，”他叹了口气说，

这意味着假期的结束。我不会请你进去，这个地方可能到处都是我的

家人。我们会在牛津见面“;我开车穿过公园回到家。

My father greeted me with his usual air of mild regret.

我父亲用他一贯的略带遗憾的语气向我打招呼。

“Here today,” he said; “gone tomorrow. I seem to see very little of you.

Perhaps it is dull for you here. How could it be otherwise? You have

enjoyed yourself?”

“今天在这里，”他说;“明天就走了。我似乎很少看到你。也许这里

对你来说很沉闷。不然怎么会这样？你玩得开心吗？

“Very much. I went to Venice.”

“非常。我去了威尼斯。

“Yes. Yes. I suppose so. The weather was fine?”

“是的。是的。我想是的。天气晴朗吗？

When he went to bed after an evening of silent study, he paused to ask:

“The friend you were so much concerned about, did he die?”

当他经过一个晚上的默默学习后上床睡觉时，他停下来问道：“你

非常关心的那个朋友，他死了吗？

“No.”

“没有。”

“I am very thankful. You should have written to tell me. I worried about

him so much.”

“我非常感谢。你应该写信告诉我。我非常担心他。

Five

五

It is typical of Oxford,” I said, “to start the new year in autumn.”

这是牛津的典型特征，“我说，”在秋天开始新的一年。

Everywhere, on cobble and gravel and lawn, the leaves were falling and

in the college gardens the smoke of the bonfires joined the wet river mist,

drifting across the gray walls; the flags were oily underfoot and as, one by

one, the lamps were lit in the windows round the quad, the golden lights

were diffuse and remote, new figures in new gowns wandered through the

twilight under the arches and the familiar bells now spoke of a year’s

memories.

到处都是鹅卵石、砾石和草坪上，树叶在飘落，在大学花园里，篝

火的烟雾与湿润的河雾汇合，飘过灰色的墙壁;旗帜在脚下油腻，四边

形周围的窗户上一盏盏灯一盏地亮着，金色的灯光弥漫而遥远，穿着

新礼服的新人影在拱门下的暮色中徘徊，熟悉的钟声现在诉说着一年

的回忆。

The autumnal mood possessed us both as though the riotous exuberance

of June had died with the gillyflowers, whose scent at my windows now

yielded to the damp leaves, smoldering in a corner of the quad.

秋天的气氛占据了我们俩，仿佛六月的喧嚣已经随着吉利花的枯萎

而消亡，它们在我窗户上的香味现在让位于潮湿的树叶，在四边形的

一角闷烧。

It was the first Sunday evening of term.

那是学期的第一个星期天晚上。

“I feel precisely one hundred years old,” said Sebastian.

“我感觉自己已经一百岁了，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

He had come up the night before, a day earlier than I, and this was our

first meeting since we parted in the taxi.

他前一天晚上来了，比我早一天，这是我们在出租车上分手后的第

一次见面。

“I’ve had a talking-to from Mgr Bell this afternoon. That makes the

fourth since I came up—my tutor, the junior dean, Mr. Samgrass of All

Souls and now Mgr Bell.”

“今天下午我和贝尔主教谈过。这是我上来的第四个——我的导

师，初级院长，万灵的萨姆格拉斯先生，现在是贝尔主教。

“Who is Mr. Samgrass of All Souls?”

“万灵之神先生是谁？”

“Just someone of mummy’s. They all say that I made a very bad start

last year, that I have been noticed, and that if I don’t mend my ways I shall

get sent down. How does one mend one’s ways? I suppose one joins the

League of Nations Union, and reads the Isis every week, and drinks coffee

in the morning at the Cadena café, and smokes a great pipe and plays

hockey and goes out to tea on Boar’s Hill and to lectures at Keble, and rides

a bicycle with a little tray full of note-books and drinks cocoa in the

evening and discusses sex seriously. Oh, Charles, what has happened since

last term? I feel so old.”

“只是木乃伊的某个人。他们都说我去年的开局很糟糕，我被注意

到了，如果我不改过自新，我就会被罚下场。一个人如何改过自新？

我猜想，一个人加入了国际联盟联盟，每周读《伊希斯》，早上在卡

德纳咖啡馆喝咖啡，抽一根大烟斗，打曲棍球，去野猪山喝茶，去基

布尔听课，晚上骑着自行车，带着装满笔记本的小托盘，喝可可，认

真地讨论性。哦，查尔斯，自上学期以来发生了什么？我觉得自己老

了。

“I feel middle-aged. That is infinitely worse. I believe we have had all

the fun we can expect here.”

“我觉得自己是中年人。这要糟糕得多。我相信我们在这里已经享

受到了所有的乐趣。

We sat silent in the firelight as darkness fell.

我们静静地坐在火光下，夜幕降临。

“Anthony Blanche has gone down.”

“安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）倒下了。”

“Why?”

“为什么？”

“He wrote to me. Apparently he’s taken a flat in Munich—he has

formed an attachment to a policeman there.”

“他写信给我。显然，他在慕尼黑租了一套公寓——他已经与那里

的一名警察结下了不解之缘。

“I shall miss him.”

“我会想念他的。”

“I suppose I shall, too, in a way.”

“我想我也会，在某种程度上。”

We fell silent again and sat so still in the firelight that a man who came

in to see me, stood for a moment in the door and then went away thinking

the room empty.

我们又陷入了沉默，静静地坐在火光下，一个进来看我的人在门口

站了一会儿，然后以为房间里空无一人就走了。

“This is no way to start a new year,” said Sebastian; but this somber

October evening seemed to breathe its chill, moist air over the succeeding

weeks. All that term and all that year Sebastian and I lived more and more

in the shadows and, like a fetish, hidden first from the missionary and at

length forgotten, the toy bear, Aloysius, sat unregarded on the chest-of-

drawers in Sebastian’s bedroom.

“这不是开始新的一年的方式，”塞巴斯蒂安说;但在接下来的几周

里，这个阴沉的十月夜晚似乎呼吸着寒冷潮湿的空气。在那一学期和

那一年里，塞巴斯蒂安和我越来越生活在阴影中，就像一个恋物癖一

样，首先被传教士隐藏起来，最后被遗忘了，玩具熊阿洛伊修斯坐在

塞巴斯蒂安卧室的抽屉柜上，无人理睬。

There was a change in both of us. We had lost the sense of discovery

which had infused the anarchy of our first year. I began to settle down.

我们俩都变了。我们失去了发现的感觉，这种发现感注入了我们第

一年的无政府状态。我开始安定下来。

Unexpectedly, I missed my cousin Jasper, who had got his first in Greats

and was now cumbrously setting about a life of public mischief in London;

I needed him to shock; without that massive presence the college seemed to

lack solidity; it no longer provoked and gave point to outrage as it had done

in the summer. Moreover, I had come back glutted and a little chastened;

with the resolve to go slow. Never again would I expose myself to my

father’s humor; his whimsical persecution had convinced me, as no rebuke

could have done, of the folly of living beyond my means. I had had no

talking-to this term; my success in History Previous and a beta minus in one

of my Collections papers had put me on easy terms with my tutor which I

managed to maintain without undue effort.

出乎意料的是，我想念我的表弟贾斯珀，他第一次在伟人中崭露头

角，现在正在伦敦过着公共恶作剧的生活;我需要他震惊;没有这种大

规模的存在，学院似乎缺乏稳固性;它不再像夏天那样挑衅和引起愤

怒。而且，我回来时吃得饱饱的，有点懊恼;下定决心放慢脚步。我再

也不会让自己暴露在父亲的幽默之下了;他异想天开的迫害使我确信，

入不敷出的生活是愚蠢的，这是任何责备都无法做到的。这个学期我

没有说话;我在历史学上的成功和我的一篇收藏论文的测试版减分使我

与我的导师相处融洽，我设法保持了这种关系，而没有付出过多的努

力。

I kept a tenuous connection with the History School, wrote my two

essays a week, and attended an occasional lecture. Besides this I started my

second year by joining the Ruskin School of Art; two or three mornings a

week we met, about a dozen of us—half, at least, the daughters of north

Oxford—among the casts from the antique at the Ashmolean Museum;

twice a week we drew from the nude in a small room over a teashop; some

pains were taken by the authorities to exclude any hint of lubricity on these

evenings, and the young woman who sat to us was brought from London

for the day and not allowed to reside in the University city; one flank, that

nearer the oil stove, I remember, was always rosy and the other mottled and

puckered as though it had been plucked. There, in the smell of the oil lamp,

we sat astride the donkey stools and evoked a barely visible wraith of

Trilby. My drawings were worthless; in my own rooms I designed elaborate

little pastiches, some of which, preserved by friends of the period, come to

light occasionally to embarrass me.

我与历史学院保持着微弱的联系，每周写两篇论文，偶尔参加一次

讲座。除此之外，我加入了拉斯金艺术学院，开始了我的第二年。每

周有两三个早晨，我们见面，大约有十几个人——至少一半是北牛津

的女儿——在阿什莫林博物馆的古董铸件中;我们每周两次在茶馆上方

的一个小房间里画裸体画;当局煞费苦心地排除了这些晚上的任何润滑

迹象，坐在我们面前的年轻女子是白天从伦敦带来的，不允许住在大

学城;我记得，靠近油炉的一侧总是红润的，另一侧斑驳不堪，皱巴巴

的，好像被拔掉了一样。在那里，在油灯的气味中，我们坐在驴凳

上，唤起了崔尔比几乎看不见的幽灵。我的画一文不值;在我自己的房

间里，我设计了精致的小糕点，其中一些由当时的朋友保存下来，偶

尔会让我感到尴尬。

We were instructed by a man of about my age, who treated us with

defensive hostility; he wore very dark blue shirts, a lemon-yellow tie and

horn-rimmed glasses, and it was largely by reason of this warning that I

modified my own style of dress until it approximated to what my cousin

Jasper would have thought suitable for country-house visiting. Thus soberly

dressed and happily employed I became a fairly respectable member of my

college.

我们是由一个和我差不多大的人指导的，他以防御性的敌意对待我

们;他穿着深蓝色的衬衫，打着柠檬黄色的领带，戴着牛角框眼镜，很

大程度上是因为这个警告，我修改了自己的着装风格，直到它接近于

我的表弟贾斯珀认为适合乡间别墅的风格。就这样，我衣着朴素，工

作愉快，成为我学院里相当受人尊敬的成员。

With Sebastian it was different. His year of anarchy had filled a deep,

interior need of his, the escape from reality, and as he found himself

increasingly hemmed in, where he once felt himself free, he became at

times listless and morose, even with me.

对于塞巴斯蒂安来说，情况就不同了。他一年的无政府状态满足了

他内心深处的需要，逃避现实，当他发现自己越来越被困在他曾经感

到自由的地方时，他有时变得无精打采和闷闷不乐，甚至和我在一

起。

We kept very much to our own company that term, each so much bound up

in the other that we did not look elsewhere for friends. My cousin Jasper

had told me that it was normal to spend one’s second year shaking off the

friends of one’s first, and it happened as he said. Most of my friends were

those I had made through Sebastian; together we shed them and made no

others. There was no renunciation. At first we seemed to see them as often

as ever; we went to parties but gave few of our own. I was not concerned to

impress the new freshmen who, like their London sisters, were here being

launched in Society; there were strange faces now at every party and I, who

a few months back had been voracious of new acquaintances, now felt

surfeited; even our small circle of intimates, so lively in the summer

sunshine, seemed dimmed and muted now in the pervading fog, the river-

borne twilight that softened and obscured all that year for me. Anthony

Blanche had taken something away with him when he went; he had locked

a door and hung the key on his chain; and all his friends, among whom he

had always been a stranger, needed him now.

在那个学期里，我们非常喜欢自己的公司，彼此之间的联系如此紧

密，以至于我们没有在其他地方寻找朋友。我的表弟贾斯珀（Jasper）

告诉我，在第二年摆脱第一年的朋友是正常的，正如他所说。我的大

多数朋友都是我通过塞巴斯蒂安结交的;我们一起摆脱了它们，没有制

造其他东西。没有放弃。起初，我们似乎一如既往地经常见到他们;我

们去参加聚会，但很少参加我们自己的聚会。我并不关心给新生留下

深刻印象，他们和她们的伦敦姐妹一样，在这里被社会推出;现在每个

聚会上都有陌生的面孔，几个月前还贪婪地结识新朋友的我，现在感

到被剥夺了;就连我们那小小的亲密圈子，在夏日的阳光下如此热闹，

现在在弥漫的雾气中显得黯淡无光，河水飘荡的暮色为我柔和和遮蔽

了一整年。安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）去的时候带走了一些东

西;他锁上了一扇门，把钥匙挂在链子上;他所有的朋友，他一直是陌

生人，现在需要他。

The Charity matinée was over, I felt; the impresario had buttoned his

astrakhan coat and taken his fee and the disconsolate ladies of the company

were without a leader. Without him they forgot their cues and garbled their

lines; they needed him to ring the curtain up at the right moment; they

needed him to direct the lime-lights; they needed his whisper in the wings,

and his imperious eye on the leader of the band; without him there were no

photographers from the weekly press, no prearranged goodwill and

expectation of pleasure. No stronger bond held them together than common

service; now the gold lace and velvet were packed away and returned to the

costumier and the drab uniform of the day put on in its stead. For a few

happy hours of rehearsal, for a few ecstatic minutes of performance, they

had played splendid parts, their own great ancestors, the famous paintings

they were thought to resemble; now it was over and in the bleak light of day

they must go back to their homes; to the husband who came to London too

often, to the lover who lost at cards and to the child who grew too fast.

慈善日场结束了，我觉得;老板扣上了他的阿斯特拉罕大衣的扣

子，拿走了他的费用，公司里那些心灰意冷的女士们没有领袖。没有

他，他们忘记了他们的提示，把他们的台词弄乱了;他们需要他在适当

的时候拉开帷幕;他们需要他来指挥聚光灯;他们需要他在翅膀上的耳

语，以及他对乐队领袖的专横眼光;没有他，就没有周刊的摄影师，没

有预先安排的善意和对快乐的期望。没有比共同服务更牢固的纽带将

他们联系在一起了;现在，金色的蕾丝和天鹅绒被收拾起来，回到了服

装店，取而代之的是当天单调的制服。在快乐的排练中，在欣喜若狂

的几分钟表演中，他们演奏了精彩的角色，他们自己的伟大祖先，他

们被认为相似的著名画作;现在一切都结束了，在黯淡的白天，他们必

须回到自己的家园;给经常来伦敦的丈夫，给在纸牌上输了的情人，给

长得太快的孩子。

Anthony Blanche’s set broke up and became a bare dozen lethargic,

adolescent Englishmen. Sometimes in later life they would say: “Do you

remember that extraordinary fellow we used all to know at Oxford—

Anthony Blanche? I wonder what became of him.” They lumbered back

into the herd from which they had been so capriciously chosen and grew

less and less individually recognizable. The change was not so apparent to

them as to us, and they still congregated on occasions in our rooms; but we

gave up seeking them. Instead we formed the taste for lower company and

spent our evenings, as often as not, in Hogarthian little inns in St. Ebb’s and

St. Clement’s and the streets between the old market and the canal, where

we managed to be gay and were, I believe, well liked by the company. The

Gardener’s Arms and the Nag’s Head, the Druid’s Head near the theatre and

the Turf in Hell Passage knew us well; but in the last of these we were

liable to meet other undergraduates—pub-crawling hearties from BNC—

and Sebastian became possessed by a kind of phobia, like that which

sometimes comes over men in uniform against their own service, so that

many an evening was spoilt by their intrusion, and he would leave his glass

half empty and turn sulkily back to college.

安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）的布景解散了，变成了一个昏

昏欲睡的青少年英国人。有时在以后的生活中，他们会说：“你还记得

我们在牛津大学认识的那个非凡的家伙——安东尼·布兰奇吗？我想知

道他后来怎么样了。他们笨拙地回到了他们如此反复无常地被选中的

牛群中，并且越来越难以辨认。这种变化对他们来说并不像对我们来

说那么明显，他们仍然偶尔聚集在我们的房间里;但我们放弃了寻找他

们。取而代之的是，我们形成了对下层公司的品味，并经常在圣埃布

和圣克莱门特的霍加斯小旅馆以及旧市场和运河之间的街道上度过我

们的夜晚，在那里我们设法成为同性恋，我相信，公司很喜欢。园丁

的手臂和唠叨的头，剧院附近的德鲁伊的头和地狱通道的草皮都非常

了解我们;但是在最后一次考试中，我们遇到了其他本科生——来自

BNC的酒吧里爬行的热心人——塞巴斯蒂安被一种恐惧症所附身，就

像有时穿制服的男人反对自己的服务一样，所以许多晚上都被他们的

闯入破坏了，他会把杯子半空着，闷闷不乐地转身回到大学。

It was thus that Lady Marchmain found us when, early in that

Michaelmas term, she came for a week to Oxford. She found Sebastian

subdued, with all his host of friends reduced to one, myself. She accepted

me as Sebastian’s friend and sought to make me hers also, and in doing so,

unwittingly struck at the roots of our friendship. That is the single reproach

I have to set against her abundant kindness to me.

就这样，马奇曼夫人找到了我们，在迈克尔马斯学期的早期，她来

到牛津一个星期。她发现塞巴斯蒂安被制服了，他所有的朋友都只剩

下我一个人。她接受我作为塞巴斯蒂安的朋友，并试图让我也成为她

的朋友，这样做，不知不觉地触及了我们友谊的根源。这是我对她对

我的丰厚善意的唯一责备。

Her business in Oxford was with Mr. Samgrass of All Souls, who now

began to play an increasingly large part in our lives. Lady Marchmain was

engaged in making a memorial book for circulation among her friends,

about her brother, Ned, the eldest of three legendary heroes all killed

between Mons and Passchendaele; he had left a quantity of papers—poems,

letters, speeches, articles; to edit them, even for a restricted circle, needed

tact and countless decisions in which the judgment of an adoring sister was

liable to err. Acknowledging this, she had sought outside advice, and Mr.

Samgrass had been found to help her.

她在牛津的生意是与万灵的萨姆格拉斯先生合作的，他现在开始在

我们的生活中扮演越来越重要的角色。马奇曼夫人正在制作一本纪念

册，在她的朋友们之间流传，关于她的兄弟内德，三位传奇英雄中的

老大，都在蒙斯和帕森代尔之间被杀;他留下了大量的文件——诗歌、

信件、演讲、文章;编辑它们，即使是在一个有限的圈子里，也需要机

智和无数的决定，在这些决定中，一个崇拜的姐妹的判断很容易出

错。她承认了这一点，于是向外界寻求建议，而萨姆格拉斯先生也找

到了帮助她。

He was a young history don, a short, plump man, dapper in dress, with

sparse hair brushed flat on an over-large head, neat hands, small feet and the

general appearance of being too often bathed. His manner was genial and

his speech idiosyncratic. We came to know him well.

他是一个年轻的历史唐，一个矮小而丰满的男人，穿着得体，稀疏

的头发梳平在过大的头上，手整齐，脚小，一般看起来太经常洗澡

了。他的举止和蔼可亲，说话也很有特色。我们很了解他。

It was Mr. Samgrass’s particular aptitude to help others with their work,

but he was himself the author of several stylish little books. He was a great

delver in muniment-rooms and had a sharp nose for the picturesque.

Sebastian spoke less than the truth when he described him as “someone of

mummy’s”; he was someone of almost everyone’s who possessed anything

to attract him.

萨姆格拉斯先生特别擅长帮助他人完成工作，但他本人也是几本时

尚小书的作者。他是悼念室的一个伟大的钻研者，对风景如画的事物

有着敏锐的嗅觉。塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）将他描述为“木乃伊的人”

时，他说的比事实还少。他几乎是所有人中拥有任何吸引他的东西的

人。

Mr. Samgrass was a genealogist and a legitimist; he loved dispossessed

royalty and knew the exact validity of the rival claims of the pretenders to

many thrones; he was not a man of religious habit, but he knew more than

most Catholics about their Church; he had friends in the Vatican and could

talk at length of policy and appointments, saying which contemporary

ecclesiastics were in good favor, which in bad, what recent theological

hypothesis was suspect, and how this or that Jesuit or Dominican had skated

on thin ice or sailed near the wind in his Lenten discourses; he had

everything except the Faith, and later liked to attend benediction in the

chapel of Brideshead and see the ladies of the family with their necks

arched in devotion under their black lace mantillas; he loved forgotten

scandals in high life and was an expert in putative parentage; he claimed to

love the past, but I always felt that he thought all the splendid company,

living or dead, with whom he associated slightly absurd; it was Mr.

Samgrass who was real, the rest were an insubstantial pageant. He was the

Victorian tourist, solid and patronizing, for whose amusement these foreign

things were paraded. And there was something a little too brisk about his

literary manners; I suspected the existence of a dictaphone somewhere in

his paneled rooms.

萨姆格拉斯先生是一位家谱学家和合法主义者;他热爱被剥夺的皇

室成员，并且知道觊觎许多王位的竞争者声称的确切有效性;他不是一

个有宗教习惯的人，但他比大多数天主教徒更了解他们的教会;他在梵

蒂冈有朋友，可以长篇大论地谈论政策和任命，说哪些当代教会是有

利的，哪些是坏的，最近的神学假设是什么可疑的，以及这个或那个

耶稣会士或多米尼加人在他的四旬期演讲中如何如履薄冰或顺风航行;

除了信仰之外，他什么都有，后来喜欢在布里德斯黑德教堂参加祝福

仪式，看到家里的女士们在黑色蕾丝披肩下虔诚地拱起脖子;他喜欢上

流社会被遗忘的丑闻，并且是推定亲子关系方面的专家;他声称热爱过

去，但我总觉得他认为所有辉煌的陪伴，无论是活着的还是死去的，

他都有些荒谬;萨姆格拉斯先生是真实的，其余的都是一场无关紧要的

选美比赛。他是维多利亚时代的游客，坚实而光顾，为了他的娱乐，

这些外国事物被游行。他的文学举止有点过于轻快;我怀疑在他镶板房

间的某个地方有一台录音机。

He was with Lady Marchmain when I first met them, and I thought then

that she could not have found a greater contrast to herself than this

intellectual-on-the-make, nor a better foil to her own charm. It was not her

way to make a conspicuous entry into anyone’s life, but towards the end of

that week Sebastian said rather sourly: “You and mummy seem very thick,”

and I realized that in fact I was being drawn into intimacy by swift,

imperceptible stages, for she was impatient of any human relationship that

fell short of it. By the time that she left I had promised to spend all next

vacation, except Christmas itself, at Brideshead.

当我第一次见到他们时，他和马奇曼夫人在一起，我当时想，她找

不到比这个知识分子更能与自己形成的对比，也没有比她自己的魅力

更好的陪衬了。这不是她进入任何人生活的方式，但在那个星期快结

束时，塞巴斯蒂安相当酸溜溜地说：“你和妈妈看起来很厚，”我意识

到事实上，我被迅速的、难以察觉的阶段所吸引，因为她对任何没有

达到这种关系的人际关系都不耐烦。当她离开时，我已经答应过下一

个假期，除了圣诞节本身，都在布里德黑德度过。

One Monday morning a week or two later I was in Sebastian’s room

waiting for him to return from a tutorial, when Julia walked in, followed by

a large man whom she introduced as “Mr. Mottram” and addressed as

“Rex.” They were motoring up from a house where they had spent the

week-end, they explained. Rex Mottram was warm and confident in a check

ulster; Julia cold and rather shy in furs; she made straight for the fire and

crouched over it shivering.

一两个星期后的一个星期一早上，我在塞巴斯蒂安的房间里等着他

上完课回来，这时朱莉娅走了进来，后面跟着一个大个子男人，她介

绍称他为“莫特拉姆先生”，称呼他为“雷克斯”。他们解释说，他们从

他们度过周末的房子里开车过来。雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）

在检查阿尔斯特（Counter ulster）时热情而自信;茱莉亚穿着皮草冷酷

而害羞;她径直走向火堆，蹲在火堆上瑟瑟发抖。

“We hoped Sebastian might give us luncheon,” she said. “Failing him

we can always try Boy Mulcaster, but I somehow thought we should eat

better with Sebastian, and we’re very hungry. We’ve been literally starved

all the week-end at the Chasms.”

“我们希望塞巴斯蒂安能给我们吃午饭，”她说。“如果他失败了，

我们总是可以尝试Boy Mulcaster，但不知何故，我认为我们应该和

Sebastian一起吃得更好，而且我们很饿。我们整个周末都在深渊挨

饿。

“He and Sebastian are both lunching with me. Come too.”

“他和塞巴斯蒂安都和我一起吃午饭。也来吧。

So, without demur, they joined the party in my rooms, one of the last of

the old kind that I gave. Rex Mottram exerted himself to make an

impression. He was a handsome fellow with dark hair growing low on his

forehead and heavy black eyebrows. He spoke with an engaging Canadian

accent. One quickly learned all that he wished one to know about him, that

he was a lucky man with money, a member of parliament, a gambler, a good

fellow; that he played golf regularly with the Prince of Wales and was on

easy terms with “Max” and “F.E.” and “Gertie” Lawrence and Augustus

John and Carpentier—with anyone, it seemed, who happened to be

mentioned. Of the University he said: “No, I was never here. It just means

you start life three years behind the other fellow.”

所以，他们毫不犹豫地加入了我房间的聚会，这是我给的最后一个

旧房间之一。雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）竭尽全力给人留下深

刻印象。他是一个英俊的家伙，黑发低垂在额头上，浓重的黑眉毛。

他用引人入胜的加拿大口音说话。人们很快就知道了他希望人们了解

的一切，他是一个有钱的幸运儿，一个议员，一个赌徒，一个好人;他

经常和威尔士亲王一起打高尔夫球，与“马克斯”、“F.E.”和“格蒂”劳伦

斯、奥古斯都·约翰和卡彭蒂埃相处融洽——似乎与任何碰巧被提及的

人相处融洽。在谈到大学时，他说：“不，我从来没来过这里。这只是

意味着你比另一个人晚三年开始生活。

His life, so far as he made it known, began in the war, where he had got

a good M.C. serving with the Canadians and had ended as A.D.C. to a

popular general.

据他所知，他的生活始于战争，在那里他得到了一个很好的 M.C.

在加拿大人服役，并以 ADC 的身份结束了一位受欢迎的将军。

He cannot have been more than thirty at the time we met him, but he

seemed very old to us in Oxford. Julia treated him, as she seemed to treat all

the world, with mild disdain, but with an air of possession. During luncheon

she sent him to the car for her cigarettes, and once or twice when he was

talking very big, she apologized for him, saying: “Remember he’s a

colonial,” to which he replied with boisterous laughter.

我们见到他的时候，他不可能超过三十岁，但在牛津，他对我们来

说似乎很老。茱莉亚对待他，就像她对待整个世界一样，带着轻微的

轻蔑，但带着一种占有的气息。午餐时，她把他送到车上去抽烟，有

一两次他说话很大声时，她为他道歉，说：“记住他是一个殖民地

人，”他用喧闹的笑声回答。

When he had gone I asked who he was.

他走后，我问他是谁。

“Oh, just someone of Julia’s,” said Sebastian.

“哦，只是茱莉亚的某个人，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

We were slightly surprised a week later to get a telegram from him

asking us and Boy Mulcaster to dinner in London on the following night for

“a party of Julia’s.”

一个星期后，我们有点惊讶地收到他的电报，邀请我们和男孩马尔

卡斯特第二天晚上在伦敦吃晚饭，参加“朱莉娅的派对”。

“I don’t think he knows anyone young,” said Sebastian; “all his friends

are leathery old sharks in the City and the House of Commons. Shall we

go?”

“我不认为他认识任何年轻人，”塞巴斯蒂安说;“他所有的朋友都是

纽约市和下议院的皮革老鲨鱼。我们走吧？

We discussed it, and because our life at Oxford was now so much in the

shadows, we decided that we would.

我们讨论了这个问题，因为我们在牛津的生活现在处于阴影之中，

我们决定这样做。

“Why does he want Boy?”

“他为什么想要男孩？”

“Julia and I have known him all our lives. I suppose, finding him at

lunch with you, he thought he was a chum.”

“茱莉亚和我一生都认识他。我想，在和你一起吃午饭时发现他，

他以为他是个笨蛋。

We had no great liking for Mulcaster, but the three of us were in high

spirits when, having got leave for the night from our colleges, we drove off

on the London road in Hardcastle’s car.

我们对马尔卡斯特不是很有好感，但是我们三个人兴致勃勃，从大

学请了假过夜，开着哈德卡斯尔的车在伦敦的路上走了。

We were to spend the night at Marchmain House. We went there to dress

and, while we dressed, drank a bottle of champagne, going in and out of one

another’s rooms which were together three floors up and rather shabby

compared with the splendors below. As we came downstairs Julia passed us

going up to her room still in her day clothes.

我们打算在Marchmain House过夜。我们去那里穿衣服，穿衣服的

时候，喝了一瓶香槟，进出彼此的房间，这些房间加在一起有三层

楼，与下面的辉煌相比相当破旧。当我们下楼时，茱莉亚从我们身边

经过，走到她的房间，仍然穿着她的日常衣服。

“I’m going to be late,” she said; “you boys had better go on to Rex’s. It’s

heavenly of you to come.”

“我要迟到了，”她说;“你们这些孩子最好去雷克斯家。你来了，真

是天上。

“What is this party?”

“这是什么派对？”

“A ghastly charity ball I’m involved with. Rex insisted on giving a

dinner party for it. See you there.”

“我参与了一个可怕的慈善舞会。雷克斯坚持要为它举办晚宴。到

时候见。

Rex Mottram lived within walking distance of Marchmain House.

雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）住在Marchmain House的步行范围

内。

“Julia’s going to be late,” we said, “she’s only just gone up to dress.”

“茱莉亚要迟到了，”我们说，“她才刚上去穿衣服。

“That means an hour. We’d better have some wine.”

“这意味着一个小时。我们最好喝点酒。

A woman who was introduced as ‘Mrs. Champion’ said: “I’m sure she’d

sooner we started, Rex.”

一位被介绍为“冠军夫人”的女士说：“我相信她会早点开始，雷克

斯。

“Well, let’s have some wine first anyway.”

“好吧，还是先喝点酒吧。”

“Why a Jeroboam, Rex?” she said peevishly. “You always want to have

everything too big.”

“为什么是耶罗波安，雷克斯？”她烦躁地说。“你总是想把所有东

西都弄得太大。”

“Won’t be too big for us,” he said, taking the bottle in his own hands and

easing the cork.

“对我们来说不会太大，”他说，把瓶子拿在自己手里，缓缓塞开。

There were two girls there, contemporaries of Julia’s; they all seemed

involved in the management of the ball. Mulcaster knew them of old and

they, without much relish I thought, knew him. Mrs. Champion talked to

Rex. Sebastian and I found ourselves drinking alone together as we always

did.

那里有两个女孩，与朱莉娅同时代;他们似乎都参与了球的管理。

穆尔卡斯特认识他们，我以为他们并不怎么津津有味，就认识他。冠

军夫人与雷克斯交谈。塞巴斯蒂安和我发现自己像往常一样独自喝

酒。

At length Julia arrived, unhurried, exquisite, unrepentant. “You

shouldn’t have let him wait,” she said. “It’s his Canadian courtesy.”

茱莉亚终于来了，不紧不慢，精致，不知悔改。“你不应该让他

等，”她说。“这是他在加拿大的礼貌。”

Rex Mottram was a liberal host, and by the end of dinner the three of us

who had come from Oxford were rather drunk. While we were standing in

the hall waiting for the girls to come down and Rex and Mrs. Champion had

drawn away from us, talking, acrimoniously, in low voices, Mulcaster said,

“I say, let’s slip away from this ghastly dance and go to Ma Mayfield’s.”

雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）是一位自由派的主人，晚餐结束

时，我们三个从牛津来的人都喝得酩酊大醉。当我们站在大厅里等着

女孩们下来时，雷克斯和冠军太太已经远离了我们，用尖锐的声音低

声交谈，穆尔卡斯特说：“我说，让我们从这个可怕的舞蹈中溜走，去

梅菲尔德马家。

“Who is Ma Mayfield?”

“马·梅菲尔德是谁？”

“You know Ma Mayfield. Everyone knows Ma Mayfield of the Old

Hundredth. I’ve got a regular there—a sweet little thing called Effie.

There’d be the devil to pay if Effie heard I’d been to London and hadn’t

been in to see her. Come and meet Effie at Ma Mayfield’s.”

“你知道马梅菲尔德。每个人都知道老百人的马 Mayfield。我有一

个常客——一个叫艾菲的可爱小东西。如果艾菲听说我去过伦敦，却

没有去看她，那她就要付出代价了。快来马 Mayfield's见Effie吧。

“All right,” said Sebastian, “let’s meet Effie at Ma Mayfield’s.”

“好吧，”塞巴斯蒂安说，“我们去梅菲尔德的马家见见艾菲吧。

“We’ll take another bottle of pop off the good Mottram and then leave

the bloody dance and go to the Old Hundredth. How about that?”

“我们会再喝一瓶好 Mottram 的汽水，然后离开血腥的舞蹈，去老

百分之一。怎么样？

It was not a difficult matter to leave the ball; the girls whom Rex

Mottram had collected had many friends there and, after we had danced

together once or twice, our table began to fill up; Rex Mottram ordered

more and more wine; presently the three of us were together on the

pavement.

离开球并不是一件困难的事情;雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）收

集的女孩在那里有很多朋友，在我们一起跳了一两次舞之后，我们的

桌子开始坐满了人。雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）订购了越来越

多的葡萄酒;现在我们三个人一起在人行道上。

“D’you know where this place is?”

“你知道这个地方在哪里吗？”

“Of course I do. A hundred Sink Street.”

“我当然知道。水槽街一百号。

“Where’s that?”

“在哪儿？”

“Just off Leicester Square. Better take the car.”

“就在莱斯特广场旁边。最好坐车。

“Why?”

“为什么？”

“Always better to have one’s own car on an occasion like this.”

“在这样的场合，拥有自己的车总是更好。”

We did not question this reasoning, and there lay our mistake. The car

was in the forecourt of Marchmain House within a hundred yards of the

hotel where we had been dancing. Mulcaster drove and, after some

wandering, brought us safely to Sink Street. A commissionaire at one side

of a dark doorway and a middle-aged man in evening dress on the other

side of it, standing with his face to the wall cooling his forehead on the

bricks, indicated our destination.

我们没有质疑这个推理，这就是我们的错误所在。这辆车停在

Marchmain House的前院，距离我们跳舞的酒店不到一百码。穆尔卡斯

特开车，经过一番徘徊，把我们安全地带到了水槽街。黑暗的门口一

侧有一位专员，另一侧有一位穿着晚礼服的中年男子，他脸贴着墙站

着，额头在砖块上冷却，表明了我们的目的地。

“Keep out, you’ll be poisoned,” said the middle-aged man.

“别出去，你会被毒死的，”中年男人说。

“Members?” said the commissionaire.

“成员们？”专员说。

“The name is Mulcaster,” said Mulcaster. “Viscount Mulcaster.”

“这个名字叫马尔卡斯特，”马尔卡斯特说。“马尔卡斯特子爵。”

“Well, try inside,” said the commissionaire.

“好吧，试试里面，”专员说。

“You’ll be robbed, poisoned and infected and robbed,” said the middle-

aged man.

“你会被抢劫、中毒、感染和抢劫，”中年男子说。

Inside the dark doorway was a bright hatch.

黑暗的门口内有一个明亮的舱口。

“Members?” asked a stout woman, in evening dress.

“成员们？”一个穿着晚礼服的粗壮女人问道。

“I like that,” said Mulcaster. “You ought to know me by now.”

“我喜欢这样，”Mulcaster说。“你现在应该认识我了。”

“Yes, dearie,” said the woman without interest. “Ten bob each.”

“是的，亲爱的，”女人不感兴趣地说。“每人十个鲍勃。”

“Oh, look here, I’ve never paid before.”

“哦，你看这里，我以前从来没付过钱。”

“Daresay not, dearie. We’re full up tonight so it’s ten bob. Anyone who

comes after you will have to pay a quid. You’re lucky.”

“不敢说，亲爱的。我们今晚吃饱了，所以现在是十点鲍勃。任何

追随你的人都必须支付一笔钱。你很幸运。

“Let me speak to Mrs. Mayfield.”

“让我和梅菲尔德太太谈谈。”

“I’m Mrs. Mayfield. Ten bob each.”

“我是梅菲尔德夫人。每个十个鲍勃。

“Why, Ma, I didn’t recognize you in your finery. You know me, don’t

you? Boy Mulcaster.”

“哎呀，马，我没认出你穿着华丽的衣服。你认识我，不是吗？男

孩穆尔卡斯特。

“Yes, duckie. Ten bob each.”

“是的，小鸭子。每个十个鲍勃。

We paid, and the man who had been standing between us and the inner

door now made way for us. Inside it was hot and crowded, for the Old

Hundredth was then at the height of its success. We found a table and

ordered a bottle; the waiter took payment before he opened it.

我们付了钱，一直站在我们和内门之间的那个人现在为我们让路。

里面又热又拥挤，因为当时老百分之一正处于成功的顶峰。我们找到

一张桌子，点了一瓶;服务员在打开门之前就收了钱。

“Where’s Effie tonight?” asked Mulcaster.

“艾菲今晚在哪儿？”穆尔卡斯特问道。

“Effie ’oo?”

“艾菲'噢'？”

“Effie, one of the girls who’s always here. The pretty dark one.”

“艾菲，一个总是在这里的女孩。很黑的那个。

“There’s lots of girls works here. Some of them’s dark and some of

them’s fair. You might call some of them pretty. I haven’t the time to know

them by name.”

“这里有很多女孩的作品。有些是黑暗的，有些是公平的。你可能

会说他们中的一些人很漂亮。我没有时间知道他们的名字。

“I’ll go and look for her,” said Mulcaster.

“我去找她，”穆尔卡斯特说。

While he was away two girls stopped near our table and looked at us

curiously. “Come on,” said one to the other, “we’re wasting our time.

They’re only fairies.”

当他不在的时候，两个女孩停在我们的桌子旁边，好奇地看着我

们。“来吧，”一个人对另一个人说，“我们在浪费时间。他们只是仙

女。

Presently Mulcaster returned in triumph with Effie to whom, without its

being ordered, the waiter immediately brought a plate of eggs and bacon.

这时，穆尔卡斯特带着艾菲凯旋而归，侍者没有点菜，就立即端来

一盘鸡蛋和熏肉。

“First bite I’ve had all the evening,” she said. “Only thing that’s any

good here is the breakfast; makes you fair peckish hanging about.”

“我整晚都吃了第一口，”她说。“这里唯一好的就是早餐;让你傻傻

地饿着肚子到处乱逛。

“That’s another six bob,” said the waiter.

“那又是六个鲍勃，”服务员说。

When her hunger was appeased, Effie dabbed her mouth and looked at

us.

当她的饥饿感得到缓解后，艾菲擦了擦嘴，看着我们。

“I’ve seen you here before, often, haven’t I?” she said to me.

“我以前经常在这里见过你，不是吗？”她对我说。

“I’m afraid not.”

“恐怕不行。”

“But I’ve seen you?” to Mulcaster.

“可是我见过你吗？”Mulcaster问道。

“Well, I should rather hope so. You haven’t forgotten our little evening

in September?”

“好吧，我宁愿如此。你没有忘记我们九月份的小晚上吗？

“No, darling, of course not. You were the boy in the Guards who cut

your toe, weren’t you?”

“不，亲爱的，当然不是。你是卫兵中那个割伤你脚趾的男孩，不

是吗？

“Now, Effie, don’t be a tease.”

“好了，艾菲，别逗了。”

“No, that was another night, wasn’t it? I know—you were with Bunty

the time the police were in and we all hid in the place they keep the dust-

bins.”

“不，那又是一晚，不是吗？我知道——警察进来的时候你和邦蒂

在一起，我们都躲在他们存放垃圾箱的地方。

“Effie loves pulling my leg, don’t you, Effie? She’s annoyed with me for

staying away so long, aren’t you?”

“艾菲喜欢拉我的腿，不是吗，艾菲？她很生气我离开这么久，不

是吗？

“Whatever you say, I know I have seen you before somewhere.”

“不管你说什么，我知道我以前在什么地方见过你。”

“Stop teasing.”

“别开玩笑了。”

“I wasn’t meaning to tease. Honest. Want to dance?”

“我不是故意取笑的。诚实。想跳舞吗？

“Not at the minute.”

“现在不行。”

“Thank the Lord. My shoes pinch something terrible tonight.”

“感谢主。今晚我的鞋子夹得很可怕。

Soon she and Mulcaster were deep in conversation. Sebastian leaned

back and said to me: “I’m going to ask that pair to join us.”

很快，她和穆尔卡斯特就深入交谈了起来。塞巴斯蒂安向后靠了

靠，对我说：“我要请那对人加入我们。

The two unattached women who had considered us earlier, were again

circling towards us. Sebastian smiled and rose to greet them: soon they, too,

were eating heartily. One had the face of a skull, the other of a sickly child.

The Death’s Head seemed destined for me. “How about a little party,” she

said, “just the six of us over at my place?”

刚才考虑过我们的两个无依无靠的女人，又朝我们盘旋而来。塞巴

斯蒂安微笑着起身向他们打招呼：很快，他们也开始吃得很开心。一

个是骷髅头的脸，另一个是生病的孩子。死神的头颅似乎是命中注定

的。“来个小聚会怎么样，”她说，“我们六个人到我家来怎么样？

“Certainly,” said Sebastian.

“当然，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“We thought you were fairies when you came in.”

“你进来的时候，我们还以为你是仙女呢。”

“That was our extreme youth.”

“那是我们极度的青春。”

Death’s Head giggled. “You’re a good sport,” she said.

死神的头咯咯地笑了起来。“你是一项很好的运动，”她说。

“You’re very sweet really,” said the Sickly Child. “I must just tell Mrs.

Mayfield we’re going out.”

“你真是太可爱了，”病恹恹的孩子说，“我得告诉梅菲尔德太太，

我们要出去了。

It was still early, not long after midnight, when we regained the street.

The commissionaire tried to persuade us to take a taxi. “I’ll look after your

car, sir, I wouldn’t drive yourself, sir, really I wouldn’t.”

时间还早，午夜过后不久，我们重新回到了街上。专员试图说服我

们打车。“我会照顾你的车，先生，我不会自己开车的，先生，我真的

不会。

But Sebastian took the wheel and the two women sat one on the other

beside him, to show him the way. Effie and Mulcaster and I sat in the back.

I think we cheered a little as we drove off.

但塞巴斯蒂安接过方向盘，两个女人一个坐在他旁边，给他指路。

艾菲、穆尔卡斯特和我坐在后面。我想我们在开车离开时欢呼了一

下。

We did not drive far. We turned into Shaftesbury Avenue and were

making for Piccadilly when we narrowly escaped a head-on collision with a

taxi-cab.

我们没有开远。我们拐进了沙夫茨伯里大道，正往皮卡迪利去，我

们险些逃脱了与出租车的正面碰撞。

“For Christ’s sake,” said Effie, “look where you’re going. D’you want to

murder us all?”

“看在基督的份上，”艾菲说，“看看你要去哪里。你想杀了我们所

有人吗？

“Careless fellow that,” said Sebastian.

“粗心的家伙，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“It isn’t safe the way you’re driving,” said Death’s Head. “Besides, we

ought to be on the other side of the road.”

“你开车的方式并不安全，”死亡之头说。“再说了，我们应该在路

的另一边。”

“So we should,” said Sebastian, swinging abruptly across.

“所以我们应该，”塞巴斯蒂安说，突然转过身来。

“Here, stop. I’d sooner walk.”

“来，停下。我早点走。

“Stop? Certainly.”

“停下？当然。

He put on the brakes and we came abruptly to a halt broadside across the

road. Two policemen quickened their stride and approached us.

他踩了刹车，我们突然停在了马路对面的路边。两名警察加快了步

伐，向我们走来。

“Let me out of this,” said Effie, and made her escape with a leap and a

scamper.

“让我离开这里，”艾菲说，然后一跃而逃。

The rest of us were caught.

我们其他人都被抓住了。

“I’m sorry if I am impeding the traffic, officer,” said Sebastian with

care, “but the lady insisted on my stopping for her to get out. She would

take no denial. As you will have observed, she was pressed for time. A

matter of nerves you know.”

“对不起，如果我妨碍了交通，警官，”塞巴斯蒂安小心翼翼地说，

“但那位女士坚持要我停下来让她下车。她不会否认。正如你所看到

的，她的时间很紧迫。你知道的，这是神经问题。

“Let me talk to him,” said Death’s Head. “Be a sport, handsome; no

one’s seen anything but you. The boys don’t mean any harm. I’ll get them

into a taxi and see them home quiet.”

“让我和他谈谈，”死神的头说。“做一项运动，帅气;除了你，没有

人见过任何东西。男孩们没有任何伤害的意思。我会把他们送上出租

车，然后看着他们安静地回家。

The policemen looked us over, deliberately, forming their own

judgment. Even then everything might have been well had not Mulcaster

joined in. “Look here, my good man,” he said. “There’s no need for you to

notice anything. We’ve just come from Ma Mayfield’s. I reckon she pays

you a nice retainer to keep your eyes shut. Well, you can keep ’em shut on

us too, and you won’t be the losers by it.”

警察故意看着我们，形成自己的判断。即便如此，如果没有穆尔卡

斯特的加入，一切都会很好。“看这里，我的好人，”他说。“你不需要

注意到任何事情。我们刚从马 Mayfield's过来。我估计她付给你一个很

好的保持器，让你闭上眼睛。好吧，你也可以让他们对我们闭嘴，你

不会因此而成为输家。

That resolved any doubts which the policemen may have felt. In a short

time we were in the cells.

这解决了警察可能感到的任何疑虑。在很短的时间内，我们就进入

了牢房。

I remember little of the journey there or the process of admission.

Mulcaster, I think, protested vigorously and, when we were made to empty

our pockets, accused his jailers of theft. Then we were locked in, and my

first clear memory is of tiled walls with a lamp set high up under thick

glass, a bunk and a door which had no handle on my side. Somewhere to

the left of me Sebastian and Mulcaster were raising Cain. Sebastian had

been steady on his legs and fairly composed on the way to the station; now,

shut in, he seemed in a frenzy and was pounding the door, and shouting:

“Damn you, I’m not drunk. Open this door. I insist on seeing the doctor. I

tell you I’m not drunk,” while Mulcaster, beyond, cried: “My God, you’ll

pay for this! You’re making a great mistake, I can tell you. Telephone the

Home Secretary. Send for my solicitors. I will have habeas corpus.”

我几乎不记得那里的旅程或录取过程。我想，穆尔卡斯特强烈抗

议，当我们被要求掏空口袋时，他指责他的狱卒偷窃。然后我们被锁

在里面，我的第一个清晰记忆是瓷砖墙，厚厚的玻璃下有一盏高高的

灯，一个铺位和一扇没有把手的门。在我左边的某个地方，塞巴斯蒂

安和穆尔卡斯特正在抚养该隐。塞巴斯蒂安在去车站的路上一直稳稳

地站着，相当镇定。现在，他被关在里面，似乎很疯狂，正在敲门，

并大喊：“该死的，我没喝醉。打开这扇门。我坚持要去看医生。我告

诉你，我没有喝醉，“而穆尔卡斯特则在另一边喊道：”我的上帝，你

会为此付出代价的！我可以告诉你，你犯了一个大错误。打电话给内

政大臣。请我的律师。我将获得人身保护令。

Groans of protest rose from the other cells where various tramps and

pickpockets were trying to get some sleep: “Aw, pipe down!” ‘Give a man

some peace, can’t yer?”…. “Is this a blinking lock-up or a looney-

house?”—and the sergeant, going his rounds, admonished them through the

grille. “You’ll be here all night if you don’t sober up.”

抗议的呻吟声从其他牢房里传来，那里有各种流浪汉和扒手试图睡

一觉：“哎呀，管下来！“给人一些安宁，不是吗？”....“这是眨眼的禁

闭室还是疯人院？”——中士巡视着，隔着格栅告诫他们。“如果你不

清醒过来，你会整晚都在这里。”

I sat on the bunk in low spirits and dozed a little. Presently the racket

subsided and Sebastian called: “I say, Charles, are you there?”

我情绪低落地坐在铺位上，打了一会儿瞌睡。这时球拍平息了，塞

巴斯蒂安叫道：“我说，查尔斯，你在吗？

“Here I am.”

“我来了。”

“This is the hell of a business.”

“这是生意的地狱。”

“Can’t we get bail or something?”

“我们不能保释什么的吗？”

Mulcaster seemed to have fallen alseep.

穆尔卡斯特似乎已经倒下了。

“I tell you the man—Rex Mottram. He’d be in his element here.”

“我告诉你那个人——雷克斯·莫特拉姆。他会在这里发挥自己的作

用。

We had some difficulty in getting in touch with him; it was half an hour

before the policeman in charge answered my bell. At last he consented,

rather skeptically, to send a telephone message to the hotel where the ball

was being held. There was another long delay and then our prison doors

were opened.

我们在与他取得联系时遇到了一些困难;过了半个小时，负责的警

察才接听了我的铃声。最后，他相当怀疑地同意给举行舞会的旅馆打

个电话。又耽搁了很久，然后我们的监狱门被打开了。

Seeping through the squalid air of the police station, the sour smell of

dirt and disinfectant, came the sweet, rich smoke of a Havana cigar—of two

Havana cigars, for the sergeant in charge was smoking also.

从警察局肮脏的空气中渗出，泥土和消毒剂的酸味，传来了哈瓦那

雪茄的甜美浓郁的烟雾——两支哈瓦那雪茄，因为负责的警长也在抽

烟。

Rex stood in the charge-room looking the embodiment—indeed, the

burlesque—of power and prosperity; he wore a fur-lined overcoat with

broad astrakhan lapels and a silk hat. The police were deferential and eager

to help.

雷克斯站在收费室里，看着权力和繁荣的化身——实际上是滑稽

的;他穿着一件毛皮衬里大衣，宽大的阿斯特拉罕翻领，戴着一顶丝绸

帽子。警察很恭敬，热心帮忙。

“We had to do our duty,” they said. “Took the young gentlemen into

custody for their own protection.”

“我们必须履行我们的职责，”他们说。“为了保护自己，把年轻绅

士们关押起来。”

Mulcaster looked crapulous and began a confused complaint that he had

been denied legal representation and civil rights. Rex said: “Better leave all

the talking to me.”

穆尔卡斯特看起来很粗鲁，开始困惑地抱怨他被剥夺了法律代表和

公民权利。雷克斯说：“最好把所有的谈话都交给我。

I was clear-headed now and watched and listened with fascination while

Rex settled our business. He examined the charge sheets, spoke affably to

the men who had made the arrest; with the slightest perceptible nuance he

opened the way for bribery and quickly covered it when he saw that things

had now lasted too long and the knowledge had been too widely shared; he

undertook to deliver us at the magistrate’s court at ten next morning, and

then led us away. His car was outside.

我现在头脑清醒，在雷克斯解决我们的业务时，我着迷地看着和听

着。他检查了指控书，和蔼可亲地与逮捕的人交谈;他以最轻微的细微

差别为贿赂开辟了道路，当他看到事情已经持续了太久，知识被广泛

分享时，他迅速掩盖了它;他答应第二天早上十点把我们送到裁判法

院，然后把我们带走。他的车在外面。

“It’s no use discussing things tonight. Where are you sleeping?”

“今晚讨论事情是没有用的。你睡在哪里？

“Marchers,” said Sebastian.

“游行者，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“You’d better come to me. I can fix you up for tonight. Leave everything

to me.”

“你最好来找我。今晚我可以修理你。把一切都交给我吧。

It was plain that he rejoiced in his efficiency.

很明显，他为自己的效率感到高兴。

Next morning the display was even more impressive. I awoke with the

startled and puzzled sense of being in a strange room, and in the first

seconds of consciousness the memory of the evening before returned, first

as though of a nightmare, then of reality. Rex’s valet was unpacking a

suitcase. On seeing me move he went to the wash-hand stand and poured

something from a bottle. “I think I have everything from Marchmain

House,” he said. “Mr. Mottram sent round to Heppell’s for this.”

第二天早上，展示更加令人印象深刻。我醒来时，感觉自己身处一

个陌生的房间里，在意识的最初几秒钟里，前一天晚上的记忆又回来

了，先是像一场噩梦，然后是现实。雷克斯的男仆正在打开一个行李

箱。看到我动了，他走到洗手台前，从瓶子里倒了点东西。“我想我拥

有Marchmain House的一切，”他说。“莫特拉姆先生派人去找赫佩尔

家。

I took the draught and felt better.

我吃了草稿，感觉好多了。

A man was there from Trumper’s to shave us.

一个来自Trumper's的男人在那里给我们刮胡子。

Rex joined us at breakfast. “It’s important to make a good appearance at

the court,” he said. “Luckily none of you look much the worse for wear.”

雷克斯和我们一起吃早餐。“在球场上表现出色很重要，”他说。

“幸运的是，你们中没有人看起来比穿得更糟。”

After breakfast the barrister arrived and Rex delivered a summary of the

case.

早餐后，大律师来了，雷克斯发表了案件摘要。

“Sebastian’s in a jam,” he said. “He’s liable to anything up to six

months’ imprisonment for being drunk in charge of a car. You’ll come up

before Grigg unfortunately. He takes rather a grim view of cases of this sort.

All that will happen this morning is that we shall ask to have Sebastian held

over for a week to prepare the defense. You two will plead guilty, say

you’re sorry, and pay your five bob fine. I’ll see what can be done about

squaring the evening papers. The Star may be difficult.

“塞巴斯蒂安陷入了困境，”他说。“他可能会因醉酒驾驶汽车而被

判处长达六个月的监禁。不幸的是，你会在格里格之前出现。他对这

类案件持相当严峻的看法。今天上午将要发生的只是，我们将要求塞

巴斯蒂安被推迟一个星期，以准备辩护。你们俩会认罪，说对不起，

并支付你们五块钱的罚款。我会看看能做些什么来平整晚报。星星可

能很难。

“Remember, the important thing is to keep out all mention of the Old

Hundredth. Luckily the tarts were sober and aren’t being charged, but their

names have been taken as witnesses. If we try and break down the police

evidence, they’ll be called. We’ve got to avoid that at all costs, so we shall

have to swallow the police story whole and appeal to the magistrate’s good

nature not to wreck a young man’s career for a single boyish indiscretion.

It’ll work all right. We shall need a don to give evidence of good character.

Julia tells me you have a tame one called Samgrass. He’ll do. Meanwhile

your story is simply that you came up from Oxford for a perfectly

respectable dance, weren’t used to wine, had too much and lost the way

driving home.

“记住，重要的是不要提及老百世。幸运的是，馅饼是清醒的，没

有被指控，但他们的名字已被作为证人。如果我们试图分解警方的证

据，他们就会被传唤。我们必须不惜一切代价避免这种情况，因此我

们必须吞下整个警察的故事，并呼吁地方法官的善良本性不要因为一

个孩子气的轻率而破坏一个年轻人的职业生涯。它会正常工作的。我

们需要一个唐来证明良好的品格。茱莉亚告诉我，你有一只驯服的，

名叫萨姆格拉斯。他会的。与此同时，你的故事很简单，你从牛津来

参加一个非常受人尊敬的舞会，不习惯喝酒，喝得太多，迷路了开车

回家。

“After that we shall have to see about fixing things with your authorities

at Oxford.”

“在那之后，我们将不得不与你们在牛津的当局讨论问题。

“I told them to call my solicitors,” said Mulcaster, “and they refused.

They’ve put themselves hopelessly in the wrong, and I don’t see why they

should get away with it.”

“我告诉他们打电话给我的律师，”穆尔卡斯特说，“他们拒绝了。

他们无可救药地把自己置于错误之中，我不明白他们为什么要逍遥法

外。

“For heaven’s sake don’t start any kind of argument. Just plead guilty

and pay up. Understand?”

“看在上帝的份上，不要开始任何形式的争论。只需认罪并付钱。

明白吗？

Mulcaster grumbled but submitted.

Mulcaster抱怨着，但还是屈服了。

Everything happened at court as Rex had predicted. At half past ten we

stood in Bow Street, Mulcaster and I free men, Sebastian bound over to

appear in a week’s time. Mulcaster had kept silent about his grievance; he

and I were admonished and fined five shillings each and fifteen shillings

costs. Mulcaster was becoming rather irksome to us, and it was with relief

that we heard his plea of other business in London. The barrister bustled off

and Sebastian and I were left alone and disconsolate.

正如雷克斯所预料的那样，一切都发生在法庭上。十点半，我们站

在弓街，我和穆尔卡斯特是自由人，塞巴斯蒂安将在一周后出现。穆

尔卡斯特对他的不满保持沉默;他和我被训诫，每人罚款五先令，罚款

十五先令。穆尔卡斯特对我们来说变得相当讨厌，我们听到他在伦敦

做其他事情的请求时松了一口气。大律师匆匆忙忙地走了，塞巴斯蒂

安和我独自一人，心灰意冷。

“I suppose mummy’s got to hear about it,” he said. “Damn, damn,

damn! It’s cold. I won’t go home. I’ve nowhere to go. Let’s just slip back to

Oxford and wait for them to bother us.”

“我想妈妈一定听说过这件事，”他说。“该死的，该死的，该死

的！好冷。我不会回家。我无处可去。咱们就溜回牛津，等着他们来

打扰我们吧。

The raffish habitués of the police court came and went, up and down the

steps; still we stood on the windy corner, undecided.

警察法庭的痞子习惯来来去去，在台阶上上下下;我们仍然站在有

风的角落里，犹豫不决。

“Why not get hold of Julia?”

“为什么不抓住茱莉亚？”

“I might go abroad.”

“我可能会出国。”

“My dear Sebastian, you’ll only be given a talking-to and fined a few

pounds.”

“我亲爱的塞巴斯蒂安，你只会被谈话，并被罚款几英镑。

“Yes, but it’s all the bother—mummy and Bridey and all the family and

the dons. I’d sooner go to prison. If I just slip away abroad they can’t get

me back, can they? That’s what people do when the police are after them. I

know mummy will make it seem she has to bear the whole brunt of the

business.”

“是的，但这一切都很麻烦——妈妈和布莱迪，还有所有的家人和

唐斯。我早就进监狱了。如果我只是溜到国外，他们就不能把我找回

来，不是吗？当警察追捕他们时，人们就是这样做的。我知道妈妈会

让人觉得她必须首当其冲地承担整个生意。

“Let’s telephone Julia and get her to meet us somewhere and talk it

over.”

“我们给茱莉亚打个电话，让她找个地方和我们见面，好好谈谈。”

We met at Gunter’s in Berkeley Square. Julia, like most women then,

wore a green hat pulled down to her eyes with a diamond arrow in it; she

had a small dog under her arm, three-quarters buried in the fur of her coat.

She greeted us with an unusual show of interest.

我们在伯克利广场的Gunter's见面。茱莉亚和当时的大多数女人一

样，戴着一顶绿色的帽子，帽子拉到她的眼睛上，里面有一个钻石箭

头;她的胳膊下夹着一只小狗，四分之三埋在她的外套毛皮里。她以一

种不同寻常的兴趣向我们打招呼。

“Well, you are a pair of pickles; I must say you look remarkably well on

it. The only time I got tight I was paralyzed all the next day. I do think you

might have taken me with you. The ball was positively lethal, and I’ve

always longed to go to the Old Hundredth. No one will ever take me. Is it

heaven?”

“嗯，你是一对泡菜;我必须说你看起来非常好。唯一一次我紧绷的

时候，第二天我就瘫痪了。我确实认为你可能把我带走了。这个球是

绝对致命的，我一直渴望去老百人队。没有人会带走我。是天堂吗？

“So you know all about that, too?”

“所以你也知道这一切？”

“Rex telephoned me this morning and told me everything. What were

your girl friends like?”

“雷克斯今天早上打电话给我，告诉我一切。你的女朋友是什么样

的？

“Don’t be prurient,” said Sebastian.

“不要妄自菲薄，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“Mine was like a skull.”

“我的就像一个骷髅头。”

“Mine was like a consumptive.”

“我的就像一个消耗品。”

“Goodness.” It had clearly raised us in Julia’s estimation that we had

been out with women; to her they were the point of interest.

“天哪。”这显然让我们在茱莉亚的估计中提高了我们和女人在一起

的经历;对她来说，他们是兴趣点。

“Does mummy know?”

“妈妈知道吗？”

“Not about your skulls and consumptives. She knows you were in the

clink. I told her. She was divine about it, of course. You know anything

Uncle Ned did was always perfect, and he got locked up once for taking a

bear into one of Lloyd George’s meetings, so she really feels quite human

about the whole thing. She wants you both to lunch with her.”

“不是关于你的头骨和消耗品。她知道你在叮当声中。我告诉她。

当然，她对此是神圣的。你知道奈德叔叔所做的任何事情都是完美

的，有一次他因为带一只熊参加劳埃德·乔治的一次会议而被关起来，

所以她对整件事真的感觉很人性化。她要你们俩和她一起吃午饭。

“Oh God!”

“天哪！”

“The only trouble is the papers and the family. Have you got an awful

family, Charles?”

“唯一的麻烦是文件和家庭。查尔斯，你有一个糟糕的家庭吗？

“Only a father. He’ll never hear about it.”

“只有一个父亲。他永远不会听说过。

“Ours are awful. Poor mummy is in for a ghastly time with them.

They’ll be writing letters and paying visits of sympathy, and all the time at

the back of their minds one half will be saying, “That’s what comes of

bringing the boy up a Catholic,” and the other half will say, “That’s what

comes of sending him to Eton instead of Stonyhurst.” Poor mummy can’t

get it right.”

“我们的太糟糕了。可怜的木乃伊和他们一起度过了一段可怕的时

光。他们会写信，去拜访他们，在他们的脑海中，有一半人会说，“这

就是把这个男孩培养成天主教徒的结果”，另一半人会说，“这就是把

他送到伊顿公学而不是斯托尼赫斯特的结果。可怜的妈妈做不到。

We lunched with Lady Marchmain. She accepted the whole thing with

humorous resignation. Her only reproach was: “I can’t think why you went

off and stayed with Mr. Mottram. You might have come and told me about

it first.”

我们和马奇曼夫人共进午餐。她以幽默的辞职接受了整件事。她唯

一的责备是：“我想不出你为什么离开并留在莫特拉姆先生身边。你可

能先来告诉我这件事。

“How am I going to explain it to all the family?” she asked. “They will

be so shocked to find that they’re more upset about it than I am. Do you

know my sister-in-law, Fanny Rosscommon? She has always thought I

brought the children up badly. Now I am beginning to think she must be

right.”

“我该怎么向全家人解释呢？”她问。“他们会非常震惊地发现他们

比我更沮丧。你认识我的嫂子范妮·罗斯康姆吗？她一直认为我把孩子

养得不好。现在我开始认为她一定是对的。

When we left I said: “She couldn’t have been more charming. What

were you so worried about?”

当我们离开时，我说：“她再迷人不过了。你这么担心什么？

“I can’t explain,” said Sebastian miserably.

“我无法解释，”塞巴斯蒂安痛苦地说。

A week later when Sebastian came up for trial he was fined ten pounds. The

newspapers reported it with painful prominence, one of them under the

ironic headline: “Marquis’s son unused to wine.” The magistrate said that it

was only through the prompt action of the police that he was not up on a

grave charge…“It is purely by good fortune that you do not bear the

responsibility of a serious accident…” Mr. Samgrass gave evidence that

Sebastian bore an irreproachable character and that a brilliant future at the

University was in jeopardy. The papers took hold of this too—“Model

Student’s Career at Stake.” But for Mr. Samgrass’s evidence, said the

magistrate, he would have been disposed to give an exemplary sentence; the

law was the same for an Oxford undergraduate as for any young hooligan;

indeed the better the home the more shameful the offence…

一周后，当塞巴斯蒂安出庭受审时，他被罚款十英镑。报纸以令人痛

苦的突出地位报道了这件事，其中一份报纸的标题具有讽刺意味：“侯

爵的儿子不习惯喝酒。裁判官说，只有通过警方的迅速行动，他才没

有受到严重指控......“你没有承担严重事故的责任，纯属运气......”萨姆

格拉斯先生提供了证据，证明塞巴斯蒂安具有无可指责的性格，大学

的光明未来岌岌可危。报纸也抓住了这一点——“模范学生的职业生涯

岌岌可危”。地方法官说，如果不是萨姆格拉斯先生的证据，他本来会

被判处惩戒性判决;对于牛津大学本科生来说，法律与任何年轻的流氓

都是一样的;的确，家庭越好，犯罪就越可耻......

It was not only at Bow Street that Mr. Samgrass was of value. At Oxford

he showed all the zeal and acumen which were Rex Mottram’s in London.

He interviewed the college authorities, the proctors, the Vice-Chancellor; he

induced Mgr Bell to call on the Dean of Christ Church; he arranged for

Lady Marchmain to talk to the Chancellor himself; and, as a result of all

this, the three of us were gated for the rest of the term. Hardcastle, for no

very clear reason, was again deprived of the use of his car, and the affair

blew over. The most lasting penalty we suffered was our intimacy with Rex

Mottram and Mr. Samgrass, but since Rex’s life was in London in a world

of politics and high finance and Mr. Samgrass’s nearer to our own at

Oxford, it was from him we suffered the more.

萨姆格拉斯先生不仅在弓街有价值。在牛津大学，他表现出了雷克

斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）在伦敦的所有热情和敏锐。他采访了学

院当局、监考人员、副校长;他诱使贝尔主教拜访基督教堂的院长;他

安排马奇曼夫人亲自与总理交谈;而且，由于这一切，我们三个人在剩

下的学期里都被关了起来。哈德卡斯尔无缘无故地再次被剥夺了使用

他的汽车的权利，这件事就这样结束了。我们遭受的最持久的惩罚是

我们与雷克斯·莫特拉姆和萨姆格拉斯先生的亲密关系，但由于雷克斯

的生活在伦敦，在一个政治和高级金融的世界里，而萨姆格拉斯先生

离我们在牛津的境界更近，我们从他那里遭受的痛苦更大。

For the rest of that term he haunted us. Now that we were “gated” we

could not spend our evenings together, and from nine o’clock onwards were

alone and at Mr. Samgrass’s mercy. Hardly an evening seemed to pass but

he called on one or the other of us. He spoke of “our little escapade” as

though he, too, had been in the cells, and had that bond with us…. Once I

climbed out of college and Mr. Samgrass found me in Sebastian’s rooms

after the gate was shut and that, too, he made into a bond. It did not surprise

me, therefore, when I arrived at Brideshead, after Christmas, to find Mr.

Samgrass, as though in wait for me, sitting alone before the fire in the room

they called the “Tapestry Hall.”

在那个学期的剩余时间里，他一直困扰着我们。现在我们被“关起

来”了，我们不能一起度过晚上，从九点钟开始，我们就独自一人，任

由萨姆格拉斯先生摆布。似乎几乎一个晚上过去了，但他拜访了我们

中的一个或另一个。他谈到“我们的小冒险”，就好像他也在牢房里一

样，并且与我们有着这种联系。有一次我从大学里爬出来，萨姆格拉

斯先生在门关上后在塞巴斯蒂安的房间里找到了我，他也建立了联

系。因此，当我在圣诞节后到达布里德斯黑德时，我发现萨姆格拉斯

先生，好像在等我，独自坐在他们称之为“挂毯大厅”的房间里的火炉

前，这并不奇怪。

“You find me in solitary possession,” he said, and indeed he seemed to

possess the hall and the somber scenes of venery that hung round it, to

possess the caryatids on either side of the fireplace, to possess me, as he

rose to take my hand and greet me like a host: “This morning,” he

continued, “we had a lawn meet of the Marchmain Hounds—a deliciously

archaic spectacle—and all our young friends are fox-hunting, even

Sebastian who, you will not be surprised to hear, looked remarkably elegant

in his pink coat. Brideshead was impressive rather than elegant; he is Joint-

Master with a local figure of fun named Sir Walter Strickland-Venables. I

wish the two of them could be included in these rather humdrum tapestries

—they would give a note of fantasy.

“你发现我孤零零地占有着，”他说，事实上，他似乎占有了大厅和

笼罩在大厅周围的阴郁的崇敬场景，占有壁炉两边的女像柱，占有了

我，他站起来握住我的手，像主人一样向我打招呼：“今天早上，”他

继续说， “我们在草坪上与马奇曼猎犬队（Marchmain Hounds）举行

了一次聚会，这是一个非常古老的奇观，我们所有的年轻朋友都在猎

狐，甚至塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）也一样，你不会感到惊讶，他穿着

粉红色的外套，看起来非常优雅。Brideshead令人印象深刻，而不是优

雅;他是当地一位名叫沃尔特·斯特里克兰-维纳布尔斯爵士的有趣人物

的联合大师。我希望他们俩能被包括在这些相当单调的挂毯中——他

们会给人一种幻想的感觉。

“Our hostess remained at home; also a convalescent Dominican who has

read too much Maritain and too little Hegel; Sir Adrian Porson, of course,

and two rather forbidding Magyar cousins—I have tried them in German

and in French, but in neither tongue are they diverting. All these have now

driven off to visit a neighbor. I have been spending a cozy afternoon before

the fire with the incomparable Charlus. Your arrival emboldens me to ring

for some tea. How can I prepare you for the party? Alas, it breaks up

tomorrow. Lady Julia departs to celebrate the New Year elsewhere, and

takes the beau-monde with her. I shall miss the pretty creatures about the

house—particularly one Celia; she is the sister of our old companion in

adversity, Boy Mulcaster, and wonderfully unlike him. She has a bird-like

style of conversation, pecking away at the subject in a way I find most

engaging, and a school-monitor style of dress which I can only call “saucy”.

I shall miss her, for I do not go tomorrow. Tomorrow I start work in earnest

on our hostess’s book—which, believe me, is a treasure-house of period

gems; pure authentic 1914.”

“我们的女主人留在家里;也是一个康复期的多米尼加人，读了太多

的玛丽坦，太少的黑格尔;当然，阿德里安·波尔森爵士（Sir Adrian

Porson）和两个相当令人生畏的马扎尔表兄弟——我用德语和法语试

过，但这两种语言都没有转移注意力。所有这些人现在都开车去拜访

邻居了。在篝火之前，我一直在和无与伦比的Charlus一起度过一个舒

适的下午。你的到来让我有勇气打电话喝茶。我怎样才能让你为聚会

做准备？唉，明天就分手了。茱莉亚夫人前往别处庆祝新年，并带走

了美女。我会想念房子里那些漂亮的生物——尤其是西莉亚;她是我们

在逆境中的老伙伴 Boy Mulcaster 的妹妹，与他截然不同。她有一种鸟

儿般的谈话风格，以一种我觉得最吸引人的方式啄食这个话题，还有

一种学校监视器式的着装风格，我只能称之为“俏皮”。我会想念她

的，因为我明天不去。明天，我就开始认真地写我们女主人的书——

相信我，这是一本时代瑰宝的宝库;纯正的1914年。

Tea was brought and, soon after it, Sebastian returned; he had lost the

hunt early, he said, and hacked home; the others were not long after him,

having been fetched by car at the end of the day; Brideshead was absent; he

had business at the kennels and Cordelia had gone with him. The rest filled

the hall and were soon eating scrambled eggs and crumpets; and Mr.

Samgrass, who had lunched at home and dozed all the afternoon before the

fire, ate eggs and crumpets with them. Presently Lady Marchmain’s party

returned, and when, before we went upstairs to dress for dinner, she said

‘Who’s coming to chapel for the Rosary?” and Sebastian and Julia said they

must have their baths at once, Mr. Samgrass went with her and the friar.

茶被送来了，不久之后，塞巴斯蒂安回来了。他说，他很早就输掉

了狩猎，然后被砍回家了;其他人紧随其后，在一天结束时被汽车接走

了;布里德斯黑德缺席;他在狗窝里有生意，科迪莉亚和他一起去了。

其余的人挤满了大厅，很快就吃起了炒鸡蛋和面包屑;萨姆格拉斯先生

在家吃过午饭，在火炉前打了一下午的瞌睡，和他们一起吃鸡蛋和面

包屑。不一会儿，马奇曼夫人的队伍回来了，在我们上楼吃晚饭之

前，她说：“谁来教堂看玫瑰经？”塞巴斯蒂安和朱莉娅说他们必须马

上洗澡，萨姆格拉斯先生和她和修道士一起去了。

“I wish Mr. Samgrass would go,” said Sebastian, in his bath; “I’m sick

of being grateful to him.”

“我希望萨姆格拉斯先生能走，”塞巴斯蒂安在洗澡时说;“我厌倦了

对他的感激。”

In the course of the next fortnight distaste for Mr. Samgrass came to be a

little unspoken secret throughout the house; in his presence Sir Adrian

Porson’s fine old eyes seemed to search a distant horizon and his lips set in

classic pessimism. Only the Hungarian cousins who, mistaking the status of

tutor, took him for an unusually privileged upper servant, were unaffected

by his presence.

在接下来的两周里，对萨姆格拉斯先生的厌恶成了整个房子里一个

不言而喻的秘密。在他面前，阿德里安·波尔森爵士那双漂亮的老眼睛

似乎在寻找遥远的地平线，他的嘴唇上写着经典的悲观主义。只有匈

牙利的表亲们误以为是家庭教师的身份，把他当成一个异常特权的上

层仆人，才没有受到他的存在的影响。

Mr. Samgrass, Sir Adrian Porson, the Hungarians, the friar, Brideshead,

Sebastian, Cordelia were all who remained of the Christmas party.

萨姆格拉斯先生、阿德里安·波尔森爵士、匈牙利人、修道士、布里德

斯黑德、塞巴斯蒂安、科迪莉亚都是圣诞晚会的剩余者。

Religion predominated in the house; not only in its practices—the daily

mass and Rosary, morning and evening in the chapel—but in all its

intercourse. “We must make a Catholic of Charles,” Lady Marchmain said,

and we had many little talks together during my visits when she delicately

steered the subject into a holy quarter. After the first of these Sebastian said:

“Has mummy been having one of her “little talks” with you? She’s always

doing it. I wish to hell she wouldn’t.”

宗教在房子里占主导地位;不仅在它的实践中——每天的弥撒和玫

瑰经，早晚在教堂里——而且在它的所有交往中。“我们必须让查尔斯

成为天主教徒，”马奇曼夫人说，在我访问期间，我们一起进行了许多

小谈话，当时她巧妙地将话题引向了一个神圣的地方。在第一次之

后，塞巴斯蒂安说：“妈妈有没有和你进行过一次”小谈话“？她总是这

样做。我真希望她不会。

One was never summoned for a little talk, or consciously led to it; it

merely happened, when she wished to speak intimately, that one found

oneself alone with her, if it was summer, in a secluded walk by the lakes or

in a corner of the walled rose-gardens; if it was winter, in her sitting-room

on the first floor.

一个人从来没有被召唤去谈一谈，或者有意识地被引导去谈;只是

碰巧，当她想亲密地交谈时，一个人发现自己和她单独在一起，如果

是夏天，在湖边僻静的散步中，或者在有围墙的玫瑰园的角落里;如果

是冬天，在她一楼的客厅里。

This room was all her own; she had taken it for herself and changed it so

that, entering, one seemed to be in another house. She had lowered the

ceiling and the elaborate cornice which, in one form or another, graced

every room was lost to view; the walls, one paneled in brocade, were

stripped and washed blue and spotted with innumerable little water-colors

of fond association; the air was sweet with the fresh scent of flowers and

musty potpourri; her library in soft leather covers, well-read works of

poetry and piety, filled a small rosewood bookcase; the chimneypiece was

covered with small personal treasures—an ivory Madonna, a plaster St.

Joseph, posthumous miniatures of her three soldier brothers. When

Sebastian and I lived alone at Brideshead during that brilliant August we

had kept out of his mother’s room.

这个房间完全是她自己的;她把它据为己有，并把它改了一遍，这

样，一进门，就好像在另一所房子里一样。她降低了天花板，精致的

檐口以这样或那样的形式为每个房间增光添彩，都消失了;墙壁上镶有

锦缎，被剥光并洗成蓝色，点缀着无数可爱的小水彩画;空气中弥漫着

鲜花和霉味百花的清新香气;她的图书馆采用柔软的皮革封面，阅读丰

富的诗歌和虔诚作品，装满了一个小紫檀木书柜;烟囱上布满了小小的

个人珍宝——象牙圣母像、石膏圣约瑟夫雕像、她三个士兵兄弟的遗

作缩影。在那个灿烂的八月，塞巴斯蒂安和我独自住在布里兹黑德

时，我们一直不住在他母亲的房间外面。

Scraps of conversation come back to me with the memory of her room. I

remember her saying: “When I was a girl we were comparatively poor, but

still much richer than most of the world, and when I married I became very

rich. It used to worry me, and I thought it wrong to have so many beautiful

things when others had nothing. Now I realize that it is possible for the rich

to sin by coveting the privileges of the poor. The poor have always been the

favorites of God and his saints, but I believe that it is one of the special

achievements of Grace to sanctify the whole of life, riches included. Wealth

in pagan Rome was necessarily something cruel; it’s not anymore.”

谈话的片段随着对她房间的记忆而回到我的脑海中。我记得她说：

“当我还是个女孩的时候，我们比较贫穷，但仍然比世界上大多数人富

裕得多，当我结婚时，我变得非常富有。我曾经很担心，我认为在别

人一无所有的情况下拥有那么多美丽的东西是错误的。现在我意识

到，富人有可能通过觊觎穷人的特权而犯罪。穷人一直是上帝和他的

圣徒的最爱，但我相信，使整个生命成圣是恩典的特殊成就之一，包

括财富。在异教徒的罗马，财富必然是残酷的;现在已经不是了。

I said something about a camel and the eye of a needle and she rose

happily to the point.

我说了一些关于骆驼和针眼的事情，她高兴地站起来。

“But of course,” she said, “it’s very unexpected for a camel to go

through the eye of a needle, but the gospel is simply a catalogue of

unexpected things. It’s not to be expected that an ox and an ass should

worship at the crib. Animals are always doing the oddest things in the lives

of the saints. It’s all part of the poetry, the Alice-in-Wonderland side, of

religion.”

“当然，”她说，“骆驼穿过针眼是非常出乎意料的，但福音只是意

想不到的事情的目录。不要指望牛和驴应该在婴儿床上敬拜。动物总

是在圣徒的生活中做最奇怪的事情。这都是诗歌的一部分，爱丽丝梦

游仙境的一面，宗教的一面。

But I was as untouched by her faith as I was by her charm: or, rather, I

was touched by both alike. I had no mind then for anything except

Sebastian, and I saw him already as being threatened, though I did not yet

know how black was the threat. His constant, despairing prayer was to be

let alone. By the blue waters and rustling palms of his own mind he was

happy and harmless as a Polynesian; only when the big ship dropped anchor

beyond the coral reef, and the cutter beached in the lagoon, and, up the

slope that had never known the print of a boot, there trod the grim invasion

of trader, administrator, missionary, and tourist—only then was it time to

disinter the archaic weapons of the tribe and sound the drums in the hills;

or, more easily, to turn from the sunlit door and lie alone in the darkness,

where the impotent, painted deities paraded the walls in vain, and cough his

heart out among the rum bottles.

但是，我没有被她的信仰所感动，就像我被她的魅力所感动一样：

或者更确切地说，我被两者都感动了。除了塞巴斯蒂安之外，我什么

都没心思，我已经看到他受到了威胁，尽管我还不知道这种威胁有多

黑。他不断的、绝望的祈祷是要放过他。在他自己心灵的蓝色海水和

沙沙作响的手掌下，他像波利尼西亚人一样快乐而无害;只有当大船在

珊瑚礁外抛锚，切割机搁浅在泻湖中，在从未知道靴子印的斜坡上，

商人、行政人员、传教士和游客的残酷入侵才被踩踏——只有到那

时，才该拆下部落的古老武器，在山上敲响鼓声;或者，更容易地从阳

光明媚的门转过身来，独自躺在黑暗中，在那里，无能为力的彩绘神

灵徒劳地在墙壁上游行，并在朗姆酒瓶中咳出他的心。

And since Sebastian counted among the intruders his own conscience

and all claims of human affection, his days in Arcadia were numbered. For

in this, to me, tranquil time Sebastian took fright. I knew him well in that

mood of alertness and suspicion, like a deer suddenly lifting his head at the

far notes of the hunt; I had seen him grow wary at the thought of his family

or his religion, now I found I, too, was suspect. He did not fail in love, but

he lost his joy of it, for I was no longer part of his solitude. As my intimacy

with his family grew, I became part of the world which he sought to escape;

I became one of the bonds which held him. That was the part for which his

mother, in all our little talks, was seeking to fit me. Everything was left

unsaid. It was only dimly and at rare moments that I suspected what was

afoot.

由于塞巴斯蒂安将自己的良心和所有人类感情的主张都算在入侵者

中，他在阿卡迪亚的日子屈指可数。因为在这一点上，对我来说，宁

静的时光让塞巴斯蒂安感到害怕。在那种警觉和怀疑的情绪中，我非

常了解他，就像一只鹿突然抬起头来，听着远处的狩猎音符;我看到他

一想到自己的家庭或宗教就变得警惕，现在我发现我也很怀疑。他没

有在爱情中失败，但他失去了爱情的喜悦，因为我不再是他孤独的一

部分。随着我与他家人的亲密关系越来越深，我成为了他试图逃离的

世界的一部分;我成了维系他的纽带之一。这就是我们母亲在我们所有

的闲聊中试图适应我的部分。一切都没有说。只是在朦胧和极少数的

时刻，我怀疑发生了什么。

Outwardly Mr. Samgrass was the only enemy. For a fortnight Sebastian

and I remained at Brideshead, leading our own life. His brother was

engaged in sport and estate management; Mr. Samgrass was at work in the

library on Lady Marchmain’s book; Sir Adrian Porson demanded most of

Lady Marchmain’s time. We saw little of them except in the evenings; there

was room under that wide roof for a wide variety of independent lives.

从表面上看，萨姆格拉斯先生是唯一的敌人。塞巴斯蒂安和我留在

布里德斯黑德有两周的时间，过着我们自己的生活。他的哥哥从事体

育和房地产管理;萨姆格拉斯先生正在图书馆里研究马奇曼夫人的书;

阿德里安·波尔森爵士（Sir Adrian Porson）占用了马奇曼夫人的大部分

时间。除了晚上，我们很少看到他们;在那宽阔的屋檐下，有空间容纳

各种各样的独立生活。

After a fortnight Sebastian said: “I can’t stand Mr. Samgrass anymore.

Let’s go to London,” so he came to stay with me and now began to use my

home in preference to “Marchers.” My father liked him. “I think your friend

very amusing,” he said. “Ask him often.”

两周后，塞巴斯蒂安说：“我再也受不了萨姆格拉斯先生了。我们

去伦敦吧，“所以他来和我住在一起，现在开始使用我的家，而不是”

游行者“。我父亲喜欢他。“我觉得你的朋友很有趣，”他说。“经常问

问他。”

Then, back at Oxford, we took up again the life that seemed to be shrinking

in the cold air. The sadness that had been strong in Sebastian the term

before gave place to a kind of sullenness even towards me. He was sick at

heart somewhere, I did not know how, and I grieved for him, unable to help.

然后，回到牛津，我们重新开始了似乎在寒冷的空气中萎缩的生活。

塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）在之前那个学期里一直很强烈的悲伤，甚至

对我也有一种闷闷不乐的感觉。他心里有些不舒服，我不知道怎么回

事，我为他悲伤，无能为力。

When he was gay now it was usually because he was drunk, and when

drunk he developed an obsession of “mocking Mr. Samgrass.” He

composed a ditty of which the refrain was, “Green arse, Samgrass—

Samgrass green arse,” sung to the tune of St. Mary’s chime, and he would

thus serenade him, perhaps once a week, under his windows. Mr. Samgrass

was distinguished as being the first don to have a private telephone installed

in his rooms. Sebastian in his cups used to ring him up and sing him this

simple song. And all this Mr. Samgrass took in good part, as it is called,

smiling obsequiously when we met, but with growing confidence, as though

each outrage in some way strengthened his hold on Sebastian.

当他现在是同性恋时，通常是因为他喝醉了，喝醉后，他养成了

“嘲笑萨姆格拉斯先生”的痴迷。他创作了一首小曲，副歌是“绿色的屁

股，萨姆格拉斯——萨姆格拉斯的绿色屁股”，按照圣玛丽的钟声唱，

因此他会在他的窗户下为他唱小夜曲，也许每周一次。萨姆格拉斯先

生是第一个在他的房间里安装私人电话的人。塞巴斯蒂安在他的杯子

里经常打电话给他，给他唱这首简单的歌。萨姆格拉斯先生很好地接

受了这一切，正如我们所说的那样，当我们见面时，他露出了乖乖的

微笑，但越来越有信心，仿佛每一次愤怒都在某种程度上加强了他对

塞巴斯蒂安的控制。

It was during this term that I began to realize that Sebastian was a

drunkard in quite a different sense to myself. I got drunk often, but through

an excess of high spirits, in the love of the moment, and the wish to prolong

and enhance it; Sebastian drank to escape. As we together grew older and

more serious I drank less, he more. I found that sometimes after I had gone

back to my college, he sat up late and alone, soaking. A succession of

disasters came on him so swiftly and with such unexpected violence that it

is hard to say when exactly I recognized that my friend was in deep trouble.

I knew it well enough in the Easter vacation.

正是在这个学期，我开始意识到塞巴斯蒂安是一个与我自己完全不

同的酒鬼。我经常喝醉，但通过过度的兴高采烈，在对当下的热爱，

以及延长和增强它的愿望;塞巴斯蒂安喝酒逃跑。随着我们一起长大，

越来越认真，我喝得更少，他喝得更多。我发现，有时我回到大学

后，他会一个人坐得很晚，浑身湿透。一连串的灾难来得如此之快，

如此出乎意料的暴力，以至于很难说我什么时候才意识到我的朋友陷

入了深深的麻烦。我在复活节假期就很清楚了。

Julia used to say, “Poor Sebastian. It’s something chemical in him.”

茱莉亚曾经说过：“可怜的塞巴斯蒂安。这是他身上的化学物质。

That was the cant phrase of the time, derived from heaven knows what

misconception of popular science. “There’s something chemical between

them’ was used to explain the over-mastering hate or love of any two

people. It was the old concept of determinism in a new form. I do not

believe there was anything chemical in my friend.

这是当时的一句话，从天知道对科普的误解。“他们之间有某种化

学反应”被用来解释任何两个人的过度控制仇恨或爱。这是新形式的决

定论的旧概念。我不相信我的朋友身上有任何化学物质。

The Easter party at Brideshead was a bitter time, culminating in a small

but unforgettably painful incident. Sebastian got very drunk before dinner

in his mother’s house, and thus marked the beginning of a new epoch in his

melancholy record, another stride in the flight from his family which

brought him to ruin.

布里德斯黑德的复活节派对是一段痛苦的时光，最终发生了一件小

而令人难忘的痛苦事件。塞巴斯蒂安在他母亲家吃晚饭前喝得酩酊大

醉，从而标志着他忧郁记录中一个新时代的开始，这是他逃离家人的

又一步，这使他走向了毁灭。

It was at the end of the day when the large Easter party left Brideshead.

It was called the Easter party, though in fact it began on the Tuesday of

Easter Week, for the Flytes all went into retreat at the guest-house of a

monastery from Maundy Thursday until Easter. This year Sebastian had

said he would not go, but at the last moment had yielded, and came home in

a state of acute depression from which I totally failed to raise him.

在一天结束时，大型复活节派对离开了布里德斯黑德。它被称为复

活节派对，尽管实际上它始于复活节周的星期二，因为从濯足节星期

四到复活节，所有弗莱特人都在修道院的招待所闭关。今年，塞巴斯

蒂安曾说过他不会去，但在最后一刻屈服了，回到家时，他处于一种

严重的抑郁状态，我完全没有把他从中恢复过来。

He had been drinking very hard for a week—only I knew how hard—

and drinking in a nervous, surreptitious way, totally unlike his old habit.

During the party there was always a grog tray in the library, and Sebastian

took to slipping in there at odd moments during the day without saying

anything even to me. The house was largely deserted during the day. I was

at work painting another panel in the little garden-room in the colonnade.

Sebastian complained of a cold, stayed in, and during all that time was

never quite sober; he escaped attention by being silent. Now and then I

noticed him attract curious glances, but most of the party knew him too

slightly to see the change in him, while his own family were occupied, each

with their particular guests.

他已经酗酒了一个星期了——只有我知道有多酗酒——而且以一种

紧张、偷偷摸摸的方式喝酒，完全不像他的旧习惯。在聚会期间，图

书馆里总是有一个格罗托盘，塞巴斯蒂安在白天的奇怪时刻溜进去，

甚至什么也没对我说。白天，这所房子基本上是空无一人的。我当时

正在柱廊的小花园房间里画另一块板子。塞巴斯蒂安抱怨感冒，呆在

里面，在那段时间里，他从来没有完全清醒过。他通过保持沉默来逃

避注意。我时不时地注意到他吸引了好奇的目光，但聚会上的大多数

人都不太了解他，看不出他的变化，而他自己的家人则忙得不可开

交，每个人都有各自的客人。

When I remonstrated he said, “I can’t stand all these people about,” but

it was when they finally left and he had to face his family at close quarters

that he broke down.

当我劝诫他时，他说，“我无法忍受所有这些人”，但当他们最终离

开，他不得不近距离面对他的家人时，他崩溃了。

The normal practice was for a cocktail tray to be brought into the

drawing-room at six; we mixed our own drinks and the bottles were

removed when we went to dress; later, just before dinner, cocktails

appeared again, this time handed round by the footmen.

通常的做法是在六点将鸡尾酒托盘带入客厅;我们混合了自己的饮

料，当我们去穿衣服时，瓶子被拿走了;后来，就在晚餐前，鸡尾酒再

次出现，这次是由步兵递过来的。

Sebastian disappeared after tea; the light had gone and I spent the next

hour playing mah-jongg with Cordelia. At six I was alone in the drawing-

room, when he returned; he was frowning in a way I knew all too well, and

when he spoke I recognized the drunken thickening in his voice.

塞巴斯蒂安在茶余饭后消失了;灯光熄灭了，我在接下来的一个小

时里和科迪莉亚打麻将。六点钟，他回来了，我一个人在客厅里;他皱

着眉头，我再熟悉不过了，当他说话时，我认出他声音里醉醺醺的加

厚。

“Haven’t they brought the cocktails yet?” He pulled clumsily on the

bell-rope.

“他们还没把鸡尾酒拿来吗？”他笨拙地拉着铃铛绳。

I said, “Where have you been?”

我说：“你去哪儿了？

“Up with nanny.”

“和保姆一起起来。”

“I don’t believe it. You’ve been drinking somewhere.”

“我不相信。你一直在某个地方喝酒。

“I’ve been reading in my room. My cold’s worse today.”

“我一直在房间里看书。我今天感冒更严重了。

When the tray arrived he slopped gin and vermouth into a tumbler and

carried it out of the room with him. I followed him upstairs, where he shut

his bedroom door in my face and turned the key.

当托盘到达时，他将杜松子酒和苦艾酒倒入玻璃杯中，然后随身携

带出房间。我跟着他上了楼，他当着我的面关上了卧室的门，转动了

钥匙。

I returned to the drawing-room full of dismay and foreboding.

我满怀沮丧和不祥的预感回到客厅。

The family assembled. Lady Marchmain said: “What’s become of

Sebastian?”

一家人聚集在一起。马奇曼夫人说：“塞巴斯蒂安怎么样了？

“He’s gone to lie down. His cold is worse.”

“他去躺下了。他的感冒更严重了。

“Oh dear, I hope he isn’t getting ’flu. I thought he had a feverish look

once or twice lately. Is there anything he wants?”

“哦，亲爱的，我希望他不会得'流感'。我以为他最近有一两次发烧

的样子。他有什么想要的吗？

“No, he particularly asked not to be disturbed.”

“不，他特别要求不要被打扰。”

I wondered whether I ought to speak to Brideshead, but that grim, rock-

crystal mask forbade all confidence. Instead, on the way upstairs to dress, I

told Julia.

我想知道我是否应该和布里德斯黑德谈谈，但那个冷酷的、水晶般

的面具禁止了所有的信心。相反，在上楼穿衣服的路上，我告诉了茱

莉亚。

“Sebastian’s drunk.”

“塞巴斯蒂安喝醉了。”

“He can’t be. He didn’t even come for a cocktail.”

“他不可能。他甚至没有来喝鸡尾酒。

“He’s been drinking in his room all the afternoon.”

“他整个下午都在房间里喝酒。

“How very peculiar! What a bore he is! Will he be all right for dinner?”

“真是太奇特了！他真是太无聊了！他吃晚饭还好吗？

“No.”

“没有。”

“Well, you must deal with him. It’s no business of mine. Does he often

do this?”

“好吧，你必须对付他。这不关我的事。他经常这样做吗？

“He has lately.”

“他最近有。”

“How very boring.”

“真是太无聊了。”

I tried Sebastian’s door, found it locked, and hoped he was sleeping, but,

when I came back from my bath, I found him sitting in the chair before my

fire; he was dressed for dinner, all but his shoes, but his tie was awry and

his hair on end; he was very red in the face and squinting slightly. He spoke

indistinctly.

我试了试塞巴斯蒂安的门，发现门是锁着的，希望他正在睡觉，但

是，当我洗完澡回来时，我发现他坐在我的火炉前的椅子上;他穿着晚

饭的衣服，除了鞋子，但他的领带乱糟糟的，头发乱糟糟的;他的脸很

红，微微眯着眼睛。他含糊不清地说。

“Charles, what you said was quite true. Not with nanny. Been drinking

whisky up here. None in the library now party’s gone. Now party’s gone

and only mummy. Feeling rather drunk. Think I’d better have something-

on-a-tray up here. Not dinner with mummy.”

“查尔斯，你说的很对。不是和保姆在一起。一直在这里喝威士

忌。图书馆里现在没有一个聚会了。现在派对不见了，只有木乃伊。

感觉很醉。我想我最好在这里放点东西。不是和妈妈一起吃饭。

“Go to bed,” I told him. “I’ll say your cold’s worse.”

“去睡觉吧，”我告诉他。“我会说你的感冒更严重了。”

“Much worse.”

“更糟。”

I took him to his room which was next to mine and tried to get him to

bed, but he sat in front of his dressing table squinnying at himself in the

glass, trying to remake his bow-tie. On the writing table by the fire was a

half-empty decanter of whisky. I took it up, thinking he would not see, but

he spun round from the mirror and said: “You put that down.”

我把他带到我隔壁的房间，试图让他上床睡觉，但他坐在梳妆台

前，眯着眼睛看着玻璃里的自己，试图重新打领结。篝火旁的写字台

上放着一个半空的威士忌醒酒器。我拿起它，以为他不会看到，但他

从镜子里转过身来，说：“你把它放下。

“Don’t be an ass, Sebastian. You’ve had enough.”

“别当屁股，塞巴斯蒂安。你已经受够了。

“What the devil’s it got to do with you? You’re only a guest here—my

guest. I drink what I want to in my own house.”

“魔鬼和你有什么关系？你只是这里的客人——我的客人。我想在

自己家里喝什么就喝什么。

He would have fought me for it at that moment.

那一刻，他会为我而战。

“Very well,” I said, putting the decanter back, “only for God’s sake keep

out of sight.”

“很好，”我说，把醒酒器放回原处，“看在上帝的份上，不要看在

别人的视线之外。

“Oh, mind your own business. You came here as my friend; now you’re

spying on me for my mother, I know. Well, you can get out, and tell her

from me that I’ll choose my friends and she her spies in future.”

“哦，管好你自己的事。你是作为我的朋友来到这里的;现在你在为

我母亲监视我，我知道。好吧，你可以出去，从我这里告诉她，我将

来会选择我的朋友，她成为她的间谍。

So I left him and went down to dinner.

于是我离开了他，去吃晚饭了。

“I’ve been in to Sebastian,” I said. “His cold has come on rather badly.

He’s gone to bed and says he doesn’t want anything.”

“我去过塞巴斯蒂安，”我说。“他的感冒来得很厉害。他上床睡觉

了，说他什么都不想要。

“Poor Sebastian,” said Lady Marchmain. “He’d better have a glass of

hot whisky. I’ll go and have a look at him.”

“可怜的塞巴斯蒂安，”马奇曼夫人说。“他最好喝一杯热威士忌。

我去看看他。

“Don’t mummy, I’ll go,” said Julia rising.

“别妈咪，我去，”茱莉亚站起来说。

“I’ll go,” said Cordelia, who was dining down that night, for a treat to

celebrate the departure of the guests. She was at the door and through it

before anyone could stop her.

“我去吧，”那天晚上正在吃饭的科迪莉亚说，她请客们庆祝客人的

离开。她在门口，在任何人阻止她之前就穿过了门。

Julia caught my eye and gave a tiny, sad shrug.

茱莉亚吸引了我的目光，悲伤地耸了耸肩。

In a few minutes Cordelia was back, looking grave. “No, he doesn’t

seem to want anything,” she said.

几分钟后，科迪莉亚回来了，看起来很严肃。“不，他似乎什么都

不想要，”她说。

“How was he?”

“他怎么样了？”

“Well, I don’t know, but I think he’s very drunk,” she said.

“嗯，我不知道，但我认为他喝醉了，”她说。

“Cordelia.”

“

科黛莉亚。

”

Suddenly the child began to giggle. “ ‘Marquis’s Son Unused to Wine,’

” she quoted. “ ‘Model Student’s Career Threatened.’ ”

突然，孩子开始咯咯地笑起来。“'侯爵的儿子不习惯喝酒，'”她引

述道。“模范学生的职业生涯受到威胁。”"

“Charles, is this true?” asked Lady Marchmain.

“查尔斯，这是真的吗？”马奇曼夫人问道。

“Yes.”

“是的。”

Then dinner was announced, and we went to the dining-room where the

subject was not mentioned.

然后宣布了晚餐，我们去了没有提到这个话题的餐厅。

When Brideshead and I were left alone he said: “Did you say Sebastian

was drunk?”

当布里德斯黑德和我单独在一起时，他说：“你说塞巴斯蒂安喝醉

了吗？

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Extraordinary time to choose. Couldn’t you stop him?”

“选择的非凡时间。你就不能阻止他吗？

“No.”

“没有。”

“No,” said Brideshead, “I don’t suppose you could. I once saw my father

drunk, in this room. I wasn’t more than about ten at the time. You can’t stop

people if they want to get drunk. My mother couldn’t stop my father, you

know.”

“不，”布里德斯黑德说，“我想你做不到。我曾经看到我父亲在这

个房间里喝醉了。当时我还不到十岁。如果人们想喝醉，你无法阻止

他们。我母亲无法阻止我父亲，你知道的。

He spoke in his odd, impersonal way. The more I saw of this family, I

reflected, the more singular I found them. “I shall ask my mother to read to

us tonight.”

他用他奇怪的、没有人情味的方式说话。我反思，我对这个家庭的

了解越多，我就越发现他们与众不同。“今晚我请妈妈给我们读书。”

It was the custom, I learned later, always to ask Lady Marchmain to read

aloud on evenings of family tension. She had a beautiful voice and great

humor of expression. That night she read part of The Wisdom of Father

Brown. Julia sat with a stool covered with manicure things and carefully

revarnished her nails; Cordelia nursed Julia’s pekinese; Brideshead played

patience; I sat unoccupied studying the pretty group they made, and

mourning my friend upstairs.

我后来才知道，这是习惯，总是在家庭紧张的夜晚请马奇曼夫人大

声朗读。她的声音很美，表情也很幽默。那天晚上，她读了《布朗神

父的智慧》的一部分。茱莉亚坐在凳子上，凳子上铺满了修指甲的东

西，小心翼翼地重新涂上了指甲漆;科黛莉亚照顾茱莉亚的北京

人;Brideshead扮演耐心;我坐在那里，无所事事地研究着他们组成的漂

亮小组，并在楼上哀悼我的朋友。

But the horrors of that evening were not yet over.

但那天晚上的恐怖还没有结束。

It was sometimes Lady Marchmain’s practice, when the family were

alone, to visit the chapel before going to bed. She had just closed her book

and proposed going there when the door opened and Sebastian appeared.

He was dressed as I had last seen him, but now instead of being flushed he

was deathly pale.

有时，当一家人独处时，马奇曼夫人的做法是在睡觉前参观教堂。

她刚合上书，打算去那里，这时门开了，塞巴斯蒂安出现了。他穿着

和我上次见到他时一样的衣服，但现在他不是脸红，而是苍白得要

命。

“Come to apologize,” he said.

“来道歉，”他说。

“Sebastian, dear, do go back to your room,” said Lady Marchmain. “We

can talk about it in the morning.”

“塞巴斯蒂安，亲爱的，回你的房间去吧，”马奇曼夫人说。“我们

可以在早上谈谈。”

“Not to you. Come to apologize to Charles. I was bloody to him and he’s

my guest. He’s my guest and my only friend and I was bloody to him.”

“对你来说不是。来向查尔斯道歉。我对他很血腥，他是我的客

人。他是我的客人，也是我唯一的朋友，我对他很血腥。

A chill spread over us. I led him back to his room; his family went to

their prayers. I noticed when we got upstairs that the decanter was now

empty. “It’s time you were in bed,” I said.

一股寒意笼罩着我们。我把他带回他的房间;他的家人去祈祷。当

我们上楼时，我注意到醒酒器现在是空的。“你该上床睡觉了，”我

说。

Sebastian began to weep. “Why do you take their side against me? I

knew you would if I let you meet them. Why do you spy on me?”

塞巴斯蒂安开始哭泣。“你为什么站在他们这边反对我？我知道如

果我让你见见他们，你会的。你为什么要监视我？

He said more than I can bear to remember, even at twenty years’

distance. At last I got him to sleep and very sadly went to bed myself.

他说的比我记得的还要多，即使相隔二十年。最后，我哄他睡着

了，自己也非常伤心地上床睡觉了。

Next morning, he came to my room very early, while the house still

slept; he drew the curtains and the sound of it woke me, to find him there

fully dressed, smoking, with his back to me, looking out of the windows to

where the long dawn-shadows lay across the dew and the first birds were

chattering in the budding tree-tops. When I spoke he turned a face which

showed no ravages of the evening before, but was fresh and sullen as a

disappointed child’s.

第二天早上，他很早就来到我的房间，而房子还在睡觉;他拉上窗

帘，窗帘的声音把我吵醒了，发现他穿着整齐的衣服，抽着烟，背对

着我，望着窗外，长长的晨影横在露水上，第一只鸟儿在萌芽的树梢

上叽叽喳喳地叫着。当我说话时，他转过脸来，脸上没有前一天晚上

的蹂躏，而是像一个失望的孩子一样新鲜而闷闷不乐。

“Well,” I said. “How do you feel?”

“嗯，”我说。“你感觉怎么样？”

“Rather odd. I think perhaps I’m still a little drunk. I’ve just been down

to the stables trying to get a car but everything was locked. We’re off.”

“相当奇怪。我想也许我还是有点醉了。我刚刚去马厩想买一辆

车，但一切都被锁住了。我们走了。

He drank from the water-bottle by my pillow, threw his cigarette from

the window, and lit another with hands which trembled like an old man’s.

他从我枕头边的水瓶里喝了一口水，把烟从窗外扔了出去，又点燃

了一根，手像老人一样颤抖。

“Where are you going?”

“你要去哪里？”

“I don’t know. London, I suppose. Can I come and stay with you?”

“我不知道。伦敦，我想。我可以来和你住在一起吗？

“Of course.”

“当然。”

“Well, get dressed. They can send our luggage on by train.”

“嗯，穿好衣服。他们可以把我们的行李送火车。

“We can’t just go like this.”

“我们不能就这样走。”

“We can’t stay.”

“我们不能留下来。”

He sat on the window seat looking away from me, out of the window.

Presently he said: “There’s smoke coming from some of the chimneys.

They must have opened the stables now. Come on.”

他坐在靠窗的座位上，望着窗外的我。目前他说：“一些烟囱冒

烟。他们现在一定已经打开了马厩。来吧。

“I can’t go,” I said. “I must say good-bye to your mother.”

“我不能去，”我说。 “我得跟妈说再见了。”

“Sweet bulldog.”

“可爱的斗牛犬。”

“Well, I don’t happen to like running away.”

“嗯，我碰巧不喜欢逃跑。”

“And I couldn’t care less. And I shall go on running away, as far and as

fast as I can. You can hatch up any plot you like with my mother; I shan’t

come back.”

“我不在乎。我会继续逃跑，尽可能远，尽可能快。你可以和我妈

妈一起策划任何你喜欢的情节;我不会回来的。

“That’s how you talked last night.”

“你昨晚就是这么说的。”

“I know. I’m sorry, Charles. I told you I was still drunk. If it’s any

comfort to you, I absolutely detest myself.”

“我知道。对不起，查尔斯。我告诉过你我还喝醉了。如果这对你

来说有什么安慰，我绝对讨厌我自己。

“It’s no comfort at all.”

“一点也不舒服。”

“It must be a little, I should have thought. Well, if you won’t come, give

my love to nanny.”

“一定是有点，我应该想到的。好吧，如果你不来，就把我的爱交

给保姆吧。

“You’re really going?”

“你真的要去吗？”

“Of course.”

“当然。”

“Shall I see you in London?”

“我在伦敦见好吗？”

“Yes, I’m coming to stay with you.”

“是的，我是来和你住在一起的。”

He left me but I did not sleep again; nearly two hours later a footman

came with tea and bread and butter and set my clothes out for a new day.

他离开了我，但我再也没有睡着;差不多两个小时后，一个仆人端

着茶、面包和黄油来了，把我的衣服摆出来，准备新的一天。

Later that morning I sought Lady Marchmain; the wind had freshened and

we stayed indoors; I sat near her before the fire in her room, while she bent

over her needlework and the budding creeper rattled on the window panes.

那天早上晚些时候，我去找马奇曼夫人;风已经清新了，我们呆在室

内;我坐在她房间的火炉前，她弯下腰做针线活，萌芽的爬山虎在窗玻

璃上嘎嘎作响。

“I wish I had not seen him,” she said. “That was cruel. I do not mind the

idea of his being drunk. It is a thing all men do when they are young. I am

used to the idea of it. My brothers were wild at his age. What hurt last night

was that there was nothing happy about him.”

“我希望我没有见过他，”她说。“这太残忍了。我不介意他喝醉的

想法。这是所有男人年轻时都会做的事情。我已经习惯了这个想法。

我的兄弟们在他这个年纪很狂野。昨晚受伤的是，他没有什么快乐

的。

“I know,” I said. “I’ve never seen him like that before.”

“我知道，”我说。“我以前从来没见过他那样。”

“And last night of all nights… when everyone had gone and there were

only ourselves here—you see, Charles, I look on you very much as one of

ourselves. Sebastian loves you—when there was no need for him to make

an effort to be gay. And he wasn’t gay. I slept very little last night, and all

the time I kept coming back to that one thing; he was so unhappy.”

“而昨晚的所有夜晚......当所有人都走了，这里只剩下我们自己的时

候——你看，查尔斯，我非常把你看作我们自己中的一员。塞巴斯蒂

安爱你——当他没有必要努力成为同性恋时。而且他不是同性恋。昨

晚我睡得很少，我一直在想那件事;他太不高兴了。

It was impossible for me to explain to her what I only half understood

myself; even then I felt, “She will learn it soon enough. Perhaps she knows

it now.”

我不可能向她解释我自己只理解了一半的内容;即便如此，我还是

觉得，“她很快就会学会的。也许她现在知道了。

“It was horrible,” I said. “But please don’t think that’s his usual way.”

“太可怕了，”我说。“但请不要以为这是他惯常的方式。

“Mr. Samgrass told me he was drinking too much all last term.”

“萨姆格拉斯先生告诉我，他上个学期喝得太多了。

“Yes, but not like that—never before.”

“是的，但不是那样的——以前从来没有。”

“Then why now? here? with us? All night I have been thinking and

praying and wondering what I was to say to him, and now, this morning, he

isn’t here at all. That was cruel of him, leaving without a word. I don’t want

him to be ashamed—it’s being ashamed that makes it all so wrong of him.”

“那为什么是现在？这里？和我们在一起？整晚我一直在思考、祈

祷，想知道我该对他说些什么，而现在，今天早上，他根本不在这

里。这对他来说太残忍了，一言不发地离开了。我不想让他感到羞愧

——正是羞愧使他变得如此错误。

“He’s ashamed of being unhappy,” I said.

“他为不开心而感到羞耻，”我说。

“Mr. Samgrass says he is noisy and high-spirited. I believe,” she said,

with a faint light of humor streaking the clouds, “I believe you and he tease

Mr. Samgrass rather. It’s naughty of you. I’m very fond of Mr. Samgrass,

and you should be too, after all he’s done for you. But I think perhaps if I

were your age and a man, I might be just a little inclined to tease Mr.

Samgrass myself. No, I don’t mind that, but last night and this morning are

something quite different. You see, it’s all happened before.”

“萨姆格拉斯先生说他很吵，情绪高涨。我相信，“她说，带着淡淡

的幽默之光划过云层，”我相信你和他取笑萨姆格拉斯先生。你很淘

气。我非常喜欢萨姆格拉斯先生，你也应该喜欢，毕竟他为你做了一

切。但我想，如果我是你这个年纪的男人，我可能只是有点倾向于自

己取笑萨姆格拉斯先生。不，我不介意，但昨晚和今天早上是完全不

同的。你看，这一切都发生在以前。

“I can only say I’ve seen him drunk often and I’ve been drunk with him

often, but last night was quite new to me.”

“我只能说我经常看到他喝醉，我也经常和他一起喝醉，但昨晚对

我来说很新鲜。

“Oh, I don’t mean with Sebastian. I mean years ago. I’ve been through it

all before with someone else whom I loved. Well, you must know what I

mean—with his father. He used to be drunk in just that way. Someone told

me he is not like that now. I pray God it’s true and thank God for it with all

my heart, if it is. But the running away—he ran away, too, you know. It was

as you said just now, he was ashamed of being unhappy. Both of them

unhappy, ashamed and running away. It’s too pitiful. The men I grew up

with”—and her great eyes moved from the embroidery to the three

miniatures in the folding leather case on the chimneypiece—“were not like

that. I simply don’t understand it. Do you, Charles?”

“哦，我不是说塞巴斯蒂安。我的意思是几年前。我以前和我爱的

人一起经历过这一切。好吧，你一定明白我的意思——和他父亲。他

曾经就是这样喝醉的。有人告诉我，他现在不是那样的人。我祈祷上

帝这是真的，并全心全意地感谢上帝，如果是的话。但是逃跑——他

也逃跑了，你知道的。就像你刚才说的，他为不开心而感到羞耻。他

们俩都不开心，羞愧，逃跑。太可怜了。和我一起长大的男人“——她

的大眼睛从刺绣上移到烟囱上折叠皮箱里的三个微缩模型——”不是那

样的。我简直不明白。你呢，查尔斯？

“Only very little.”

“只有很少。”

“And yet Sebastian is fonder of you than of any of us, you know. You’ve

got to help him. I can’t.”

“然而，塞巴斯蒂安比我们任何人都更爱你，你知道的。你必须帮

助他。我不能。

I have here compressed into a few sentences what, there, required many.

Lady Marchmain was not diffuse, but she took hold of her subject in a

feminine, flirtatious way, circling, approaching, retreating, feinting; she

hovered over it like a butterfly; she played ‘grandmother’s steps’ with it,

getting nearer the real point imperceptibly while one’s back was turned,

standing rooted when she was observed. The unhappiness, the running

away—these made up her sorrow, and in her own way she exposed the

whole of it, before she was done. It was an hour before she had said all she

meant to say. Then, as I rose to leave her, she added as though in an

afterthought: “I wonder have you seen my brothers’ book? It has just come

out.”

我在这里把那里需要很多的东西压缩成几句话。马奇曼夫人并不散

漫，但她以一种女性化的、调情的方式抓住了她的主题，盘旋、接

近、后退、佯攻;她像蝴蝶一样盘旋在上面;她玩起了“祖母的脚步”，在

一个人转过身来的时候，不知不觉地靠近了真正的点，当她被观察

时，她站在那里。不快乐，逃避——这些构成了她的悲伤，在她完成

之前，她以自己的方式暴露了这一切。一个小时后，她才说出她想说

的话。然后，当我起身离开她时，她又补充了一句，仿佛在事后想了

想：“我想知道你看过我哥哥的书吗？它刚刚出来。

I told her I had looked through it in Sebastian’s rooms.

我告诉她我在塞巴斯蒂安的房间里看过。

“I should like you to have a copy. May I give you one? They were three

splendid men; Ned was the best of them. He was the last to be killed, and

when the telegram came, as I knew it would come, I thought: “Now it’s my

son’s turn to do what Ned can never do now.” I was alone then. He was just

going to Eton. If you read Ned’s book you’ll understand.”

“我想让你有一份，我可以给你一份吗？他们是三个出色的人;奈德

是他们中最好的。他是最后一个被杀的人，当电报传来时，我知道它

会到来，我想：“现在轮到我儿子做奈德现在永远做不到的事情了。那

时我独自一人。他只是要去伊顿公学。如果你读过奈德的书，你就会

明白。

She had a copy lying ready on her bureau. I thought at the time, “She

planned this parting before ever I came in. Had she rehearsed all the

interview? If things had gone differently would she have put the book back

in the drawer?”

她的办公室里放着一本。我当时想，“在我进来之前，她就计划好

了这次离别。她排练了所有的采访吗？如果事情不一样，她会把书放

回抽屉里吗？

She wrote her name and mine on the fly leaf, the date and place.

她在活页上写下了她的名字和我的名字，日期和地点。

“I prayed for you, too, in the night,” she said.

“我也在晚上为你祈祷，”她说。

I closed the door behind me, shutting out the bondieuserie, the low

ceiling, the chintz, the lambskin bindings, the views of Florence, the bowls

of hyacinth and potpourri, the petit-point, the intimate feminine, modern

world and was back under the coved and coffered roof, the columns and

entablature of the central hall, in the august, masculine atmosphere of a

better age.

我关上了身后的门，关上了阁楼、低矮的天花板、印花棉布、羊皮

装订、佛罗伦萨的景色、风信子碗和百花香、小点、亲密的女性、现

代世界，回到了拱形和格子屋顶下，中央大厅的柱子和柱廊下，在一

个美好时代的庄严、阳刚的氛围中。

I was no fool; I was old enough to know that an attempt had been made

to suborn me and young enough to have found the experience agreeable.

我不是傻瓜;我年纪大了，知道有人试图劝说我，也年轻到觉得这

种经历是令人愉快的。

I did not see Julia that morning, but just as I was leaving Cordelia ran to

the door of the car and said: “Will you be seeing Sebastian? Please give him

my special love. Will you remember—my special love?”

那天早上我没有见到茱莉亚，但就在我离开的时候，科迪莉亚跑到

车门口说：“你会见到塞巴斯蒂安吗？请把我特别的爱给他。你会记得

——我特别的爱吗？

In the train to London I read the book Lady Marchmain had given me. The

frontispiece reproduced the photograph of a young man in Grenadier

uniform, and I saw plainly revealed there the origin of that grim mask

which, in Brideshead, overlaid the gracious features of his father’s family;

this was a man of the woods and caves, a hunter, a judge of the tribal

council, the repository of the harsh traditions of a people at war with their

environment. There were other illustrations in the book, snapshots of the

three brothers on holiday, and in each I traced the same archaic lines; and

remembering Lady Marchmain, starry and delicate, I could find no likeness

to her in these somber men.

在去伦敦的火车上，我读了马奇曼夫人送给我的书。卷首再现了一个

穿着掷弹兵制服的年轻人的照片，我清楚地看到那里揭示了那个冷酷

的面具的来源，在布里德斯黑德，它覆盖了他父亲家庭的亲切特征;这

是一个树林和洞穴的人，一个猎人，一个部落委员会的法官，一个与

环境交战的民族严酷传统的宝库。书中还有其他插图，是三兄弟度假

的快照，在每幅插图中，我都描绘了相同的古老线条;想起马奇曼夫

人，星光熠熠，娇嫩娇嫩，我在这些忧郁的男人身上找不到与她相似

的地方。

She appeared seldom in the book; she was older than the eldest of them

by nine years and had married and left home while they were schoolboys;

between her and them stood two other sisters; after the birth of the third

daughter there had been pilgrimages and pious benefactions in request for a

son, for theirs was a wide property and an ancient name; male heirs had

come late and, when they came, in a profusion which at the time seemed to

promise continuity to the line which, in the tragic event, ended abruptly

with them.

她很少出现在书中;她比他们中的老大大九岁，在他们上学的时候

就结婚了，离家出走了;在她和他们之间站着另外两个姐妹;第三个女

儿出生后，人们纷纷前来朝圣，虔诚地施舍，要求生一个儿子，因为

他们的财产很宽，名字很古老。男性继承人姗姗来迟，当他们来的时

候，数量之多，这在当时似乎预示着血统的延续，而在悲惨的事件

中，这一血统突然与他们一起结束了。

The family history was typical of the Catholic squires of England; from

Elizabeth’s reign till Victoria’s they lived sequestered lives, among their

tenantry and kinsmen, sending their sons to school abroad, often marrying

there, inter-marrying, if not, with a score of families like themselves,

debarred from all preferment, and learning, in those lost generations,

lessons which could still be read in the lives of the last three men of the

house.

家族史是英国天主教乡绅的典型特征。从伊丽莎白统治时期到维多

利亚时代，他们过着与世隔绝的生活，在他们的佃户和亲戚中，把他

们的儿子送到国外上学，经常在那里结婚，与许多像他们一样的家庭

通婚，如果不是这样的话，他们被禁止参加任何预科，并在那些迷惘

的几代人中学习，这些教训仍然可以在房子的最后三个人的生活中读

到。

Mr. Samgrass’s deft editorship had assembled and arranged a curiously

homogeneous little body of writing—poetry, letters, scraps of a journal, an

unpublished essay or two, which all exhaled the same high-spirited, serious,

chivalrous, other-worldly air and the letters from their contemporaries,

written after their deaths, all in varying degrees of articulateness, told the

same tale of men who were, in all the full flood of academic and athletic

success, of popularity and the promise of great rewards ahead, seen

somehow as set apart from their fellows, garlanded victims, devoted to the

sacrifice. These men must die to make a world for Hooper; they were the

aborigines, vermin by right of law, to be shot off at leisure so that things

might be safe for the travelling salesman, with his polygonal pince-nez, his

fat wet hand-shake, his grinning dentures. I wondered, as the train carried

me farther and farther from Lady Marchmain, whether perhaps there was

not on her, too, the same blaze, marking her and hers for destruction by

other ways than war. Did she see a sign in the red center of her cozy grate

and hear it in the rattle of creeper on the window-pane, this whisper of

doom?

萨姆格拉斯先生灵巧的编辑工作已经收集和安排了一小段奇怪的同

质化作品——诗歌、信件、日记的碎片、一两篇未发表的散文，它们

都散发着同样的昂扬、严肃、侠义、超凡脱俗的气息，而他们同时代

人的书信，在他们死后写成的，都以不同程度的清晰度讲述了同一个

人的故事。在学业和体育上取得的巨大成功、声望和未来丰厚回报的

承诺中，不知何故被视为与他们的同伴、花环受害者、献身于牺牲的

牺牲者区分开来。这些人必须死去，才能为胡珀创造一个世界;他们是

原住民，是法律上的害虫，可以悠闲地被射杀，这样旅行的推销员就

可以安全了，他的多边形的pince-nez，他胖胖的湿手握手，他咧嘴笑

的假牙。我想知道，当火车把我带到离马奇曼夫人越来越远的地方

时，也许她身上没有同样的火焰，标志着她和她的战争以外的其他方

式的毁灭。她有没有看到她舒适的炉排红色中央的标志，在窗玻璃上

爬山虎的嘎嘎声中听到了它，这是厄运的低语？

Then I reached Paddington and, returning home, found Sebastian there,

and the sense of tragedy vanished, for he was gay and free as when I first

met him.

然后我到达了帕丁顿，回到家里，发现塞巴斯蒂安在那里，悲剧感

消失了，因为他是同性恋，和我第一次见到他时一样自由。

“Cordelia sent you her special love.”

“科黛莉亚送给你她特别的爱。”

“Did you have a “little talk” with mummy?”

“你和妈妈有没有'闲聊'？”

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Have you gone over to her side?”

“你去她那边了吗？”

The day before I would have said: “There aren’t two sides”; that day I

said, “No, I’m with you, ‘Sebastian contra mundum.’ ”

前一天我会说：“没有两面”;那天我说，“不，我和你在一起，'塞巴

斯蒂安反对世界'。"

And that was all the conversation we had on the subject, then or ever.

这就是我们关于这个话题的所有对话，无论是过去还是将来。

But the shadows were closing round Sebastian. We returned to Oxford and

once again the gillyflowers bloomed under my windows and the chestnut lit

the streets and the warm stones strewed their flakes upon the cobble; but it

was not as it had been; there was mid-winter in Sebastian’s heart.

但阴影正在塞巴斯蒂安周围合拢。我们回到牛津，我的窗下再次盛开

了吉利花，栗子照亮了街道，温暖的石头在鹅卵石上散落着雪花;但情

况并非如此;塞巴斯蒂安的心里有隆冬。

The weeks went by; we looked for lodgings for the coming term and

found them in Merton Street, a secluded, expensive little house near the

tennis court.

几个星期过去了;我们寻找下学期的住处，在默顿街（Merton

Street）找到了他们，这是一座靠近网球场的僻静而昂贵的小房子。

Meeting Mr. Samgrass, whom we had seen less often of late, I told him

of our choice. He was standing at the table in Blackwell’s where recent

German books were displayed, setting aside a little heap of purchases.

见到萨姆格拉斯先生时，我们最近很少见到他，我告诉他我们的选

择。他站在布莱克威尔书店的桌子旁，那里陈列着最近的德国书籍，

把一小堆买的东西放在一边。

“You’re sharing digs with Sebastian?” he said. “So he is coming up next

term?”

“你和塞巴斯蒂安一起挖掘吗？”他说。“所以他下学期就要上来

了？”

“I suppose so. Why shouldn’t he be?”

“我想是的。他为什么不呢？

“I don’t know why; I somehow thought perhaps he wasn’t. I’m always

wrong about things like that. I like Merton Street.”

“我不知道为什么;我不知何故想，也许他不是。我总是对这样的事

情犯错。我喜欢默顿街。

He showed me the books he was buying, which, since I knew no

German, were not of interest to me. As I left him he said: “Don’t think me

interfering, you know, but I shouldn’t make any definite arrangement in

Merton Street until you’re sure.”

他给我看了他买的书，因为我不懂德语，所以我不感兴趣。当我离

开他时，他说：“不要以为我在干涉，你知道的，但在你确定之前，我

不应该在默顿街做出任何明确的安排。

I told Sebastian of this conversation and he said: “Yes, there’s a plot on.

Mummy wants me to go and live with Mgr Bell.”

我把这次谈话告诉了塞巴斯蒂安，他说：“是的，有一个阴谋。妈

妈要我去和贝尔主教住在一起。

“Why didn’t you tell me about it?”

“你为什么不告诉我？”

“Because I’m not going to live with Mgr Bell.”

“因为我不会和贝尔主教住在一起。”

“I still think you might have told me. When did it start?”

“我仍然认为你可能已经告诉我了。什么时候开始的？

“Oh, it’s been going on. Mummy’s very clever, you know. She saw

she’d failed with you. I expect it was the letter you wrote after reading

Uncle Ned’s book.”

“哦，这一直在发生。妈妈很聪明，你知道的。她看到她和你失败

了。我想是你读完奈德叔叔的书后写的那封信。

“I hardly said anything.”

“我几乎什么也没说。”

“That was it. If you were going to be any help to her, you would have

said a lot. Uncle Ned is the test, you know.”

“就是这样。如果你要对她有任何帮助，你会说很多。内德叔叔就

是考验，你知道的。

But it seemed she had not quite despaired, for a few days later I got a

note from her which said: “I shall be passing through Oxford on Tuesday

and hope to see you and Sebastian. I would like to see you alone for five

minutes before I see him. Is that too much to ask? I will come to your rooms

at about twelve.”

但她似乎并没有完全绝望，因为几天后，我收到了她的一张纸条，

上面写着：“我星期二将经过牛津，希望能见到你和塞巴斯蒂安。在我

见到他之前，我想单独见你五分钟。这要求是不是太过分了？我会在

十二点左右到你的房间。

She came; she admired my rooms…. “My brothers Simon and Ned were

here, you know. Ned had rooms on the garden front. I wanted Sebastian to

come here, too, but my husband was at Christ Church and, as you know, he

took charge of Sebastian’s education”; she admired my

drawings…“everyone loves your paintings in the garden-room. We shall

never forgive you if you don’t finish them.” Finally, she came to her point.

她来了;她很欣赏我的房间......“我的兄弟西蒙和奈德在这里，你知

道的。奈德在花园前面有房间。我也想让塞巴斯蒂安来这里，但我丈

夫在基督教堂，如你所知，他负责塞巴斯蒂安的教育“;她很欣赏我的

画......“每个人都喜欢你在花园房间里的画。如果你不完成它们，我们

永远不会原谅你。最后，她明白了自己的观点。

“I expect you’ve guessed already what I have come to ask. Quite simply,

is Sebastian drinking too much this term?”

“我想你已经猜到了我来问什么。很简单，塞巴斯蒂安这个学期喝

得太多了吗？

I had guessed; I answered: “If he were, I shouldn’t answer. As it is, I can

say, “No”.”

我猜到了;我回答说：“如果他是，我就不应该回答。事实上，我可

以说，“不”。

She said: “I believe you. Thank God!” and we went together to luncheon

at Christ Church.

她说：“我相信你。感谢上帝！“然后我们一起去基督教堂吃午饭。

That night Sebastian had his third disaster and was found by the junior

dean at one o’clock, wandering round Tom Quad hopelessly drunk.

那天晚上，塞巴斯蒂安遭遇了第三次灾难，在一点钟被初级院长发

现，在汤姆·夸德周围徘徊，无可救药地喝醉了。

I had left him morose but completely sober at a few minutes before

twelve. In the succeeding hour he had drunk half a bottle of whisky alone.

He did not remember much about it when he came to tell me next morning.

我让他闷闷不乐，但在十二点前的几分钟里完全清醒了。在接下来

的一个小时里，他一个人喝了半瓶威士忌。第二天早上他来告诉我

时，他不太记得这件事了。

“Have you been doing that a lot,” I asked, “drinking by yourself after

I’ve gone?”

“你经常这样做吗，”我问，“我走后自己喝酒吗？

“About twice; perhaps four times. It’s only when they start bothering

me. I’d be all right if they’d only leave me alone.”

“大约两次;也许四次。只有当他们开始打扰我时。如果他们只让我

一个人呆着我就没事了。

“They won’t now,” I said.

“他们现在不会了，”我说。

“I know.”

“我知道。”

We both knew that this was a crisis. I had no love for Sebastian that

morning; he needed it, but I had none to give.

我们都知道这是一场危机。那天早上，我对塞巴斯蒂安没有爱;他

需要它，但我没有任何东西可以给予。

“Really,” I said, “if you are going to embark on a solitary bout of

drinking every time you see a member of your family, it’s perfectly

hopeless.”

“真的，”我说，“如果你每次见到家人都要独自喝酒，那完全是没

有希望的。

“Oh, yes,” said Sebastian with great sadness. “I know. It’s hopeless.”

“哦，是的，”塞巴斯蒂安非常悲伤地说。“我知道。这是没有希望

的。

But my pride was stung because I had been made to look a liar and I

could not respond to his need.

但我的自尊心被刺痛了，因为我被塑造成一个骗子的样子，我无法

回应他的需要。

“Well, what do you propose to do?”

“嗯，你打算怎么做？”

“I shan’t do anything. They’ll do it all.”

“我什么都不做。他们会做这一切。

And I let him go without comfort.

我让他走了，没有安慰。

Then the machinery began to move again, and I saw it all repeated as it

had happened in December; Mr. Samgrass and Mgr Bell saw the Dean of

Christ Church; Brideshead came up for a night; the heavy wheels stirred

and the small wheels spun. Everyone was exceedingly sorry for Lady

Marchmain, whose brothers’ names stood in letters of gold on the war

memorial, whose brothers’ memory was fresh in many breasts.

然后机器又开始运转了，我看到这一切像12月发生的那样重演;萨

姆格拉斯先生和贝尔主教见到了基督教堂的院长;Brideshead来了一夜;

沉重的轮子搅动着，小轮子旋转着。每个人都为马奇曼夫人感到非常

难过，她哥哥的名字用金字写在战争纪念碑上，她哥哥们的记忆在许

多人的胸膛里记忆犹新。

She came to see me and, again, I must reduce to a few words a

conversation which took us from Holywell to the Parks, through

Mesopotamia, and over the ferry to north Oxford, where she was staying

the night with a houseful of nuns who were in some way under her

protection.

她来看我，我必须再说一遍，把我们从霍利韦尔带到公园，穿过美

索不达米亚，然后乘渡轮到牛津北部，在那里她和一群修女一起过

夜，这些修女在某种程度上受到她的保护。

“You must believe,” I said, “that when I told you Sebastian was not

drinking, I was telling you the truth, as I knew it.”

“你必须相信，”我说，“当我告诉你塞巴斯蒂安没有喝酒时，我说

的是实话，正如我所知道的那样。

“I know you wish to be a good friend to him.”

“我知道你想和他做个好朋友。”

“That is not what I mean. I believed what I told you. I still believe it to

some extent. I believe he has been drunk two or three times before, not

more.”

“我不是这个意思。我相信我告诉你的。在某种程度上，我仍然相

信它。我相信他以前喝过两三次，不会更多。

“It’s no good, Charles,” she said. “All you can mean is that you have not

as much influence or knowledge of him as I thought. It is no good either of

us trying to believe him. I’ve known drunkards before. One of the most

terrible things about them is their deceit. Love of truth is the first thing that

goes.

“这不好，查尔斯，”她说。“你只能说，你对他的影响力或了解没

有我想象的那么多。我们俩都想相信他，这都不好。我以前认识酒

鬼。他们最可怕的事情之一就是他们的欺骗。对真理的热爱是第一件

事。

“After that happy luncheon together. When you left he was so sweet to

me, just as he used to be as a little boy, and I agreed to all he wanted. You

know I had been doubtful about his sharing rooms with you. I know you’ll

understand me when I say that. You know that we are all fond of you apart

from your being Sebastian’s friend. We should miss you so much if you

ever stopped coming to stay with us. But I want Sebastian to have all sorts

of friends, not just one. Mgr Bell tells me he never mixes with the other

Catholics, never goes to the Newman, very rarely goes to mass even.

Heaven forbid that he should only know Catholics, but he must know some.

It needs a very strong faith to stand entirely alone and Sebastian’s isn’t

strong.

“在那场快乐的午餐之后。当你离开时，他对我是如此的甜蜜，就

像他曾经还是个小男孩一样，我同意了他想要的一切。你知道我一直

怀疑他和你同住一个房间。我知道当我这么说时，你会理解我的。你

知道，除了你是塞巴斯蒂安的朋友之外，我们都喜欢你。如果你不再

来和我们住在一起，我们应该非常想念你。但我希望塞巴斯蒂安有各

种各样的朋友，而不仅仅是一个。貝爾主教告訴我，他從來不與其他

天主教徒混在一起，從來不去紐曼，甚至很少參加彌撒。上天禁止他

只认识天主教徒，但他必须知道一些。它需要非常坚定的信念才能完

全独立，而塞巴斯蒂安的信念并不强大。

“But I was so happy at luncheon on Tuesday that I gave up all my

objections; I went round with him and saw the rooms you had chosen. They

are charming. And we decided on some furniture you could have from

London to make them nicer. And then, on the very night after I had seen

him!—No Charles, it is not in the Logic of the Thing.”

“但是我在周二的午餐会上非常高兴，以至于我放弃了所有的反对

意见;我和他一起走了一圈，看到了你选择的房间。他们很迷人。我们

决定从伦敦买一些家具，让它们变得更好。然后，就在我见到他之后

的那天晚上！——不，查尔斯，这不在事情的逻辑中。

As she said it I thought, “That’s a phrase she’s picked up from one of her

intellectual hangers-on.”

当她说这句话时，我想，“这是她从她的一个知识分子那里学到的

一句话。

“Well,” I said, “have you a remedy?”

“嗯，”我说，“你有补救办法吗？

“The college are being extraordinarily kind. They say they will not send

him down provided he goes to live with Mgr Bell. It’s not a thing I could

have suggested myself, but it was the Monsignor’s own idea. He specially

sent a message to you to say how welcome you would always be. There’s

not room for you actually in the Old Palace, but I daresay you wouldn’t

want that yourself.”

“学院非常友善。他们说，只要他去和贝尔主教住在一起，他们就

不会把他送下去。这不是我自己可以建议的事情，但这是主教自己的

想法。他特意给你发了一条信息，说你会永远受到欢迎。在旧宫殿里

其实没有你的空间，但我敢说你自己不会想要的。

“Lady Marchmain, if you want to make him a drunkard that’s the way to

do it. Don’t you see that any idea of his being watched would be fatal?”

“马奇曼夫人，如果你想把他变成一个酒鬼，那就是办法。难道你

看不出他被监视的想法是致命的吗？

“Oh, dear, it’s no good trying to explain. Protestants always think

Catholic priests are spies.”

“哦，亲爱的，试图解释是没有用的。新教徒总是认为天主教神父

是间谍。

“I don’t mean that.” I tried to explain but made a poor business of it.

“He must feel free.”

“我不是那个意思。”我试图解释，但做得很差。“他必须感到自

由。”

“But he’s been free, always, up till now, and look at the result.”

“但他一直都是自由的，直到现在，看看结果。

We had reached the ferry; we had reached a deadlock. With scarcely

another word I saw her to the convent, then took the bus back to Carfax.

我们到达了渡口;我们陷入了僵局。我几乎没再说一句话就把她送

到了修道院，然后乘公共汽车回到了卡尔法克斯。

Sebastian was in my rooms waiting for me. “I’m going to cable to

papa,” he said. “He won’t let them force me into this priest’s house.”

塞巴斯蒂安在我的房间里等我。“我要给爸爸打电报，”他说。“他

不会让他们强迫我进入这个牧师的房子。

“But if they make it a condition of your coming up?”

“但是，如果他们把这作为你上来的条件呢？”

“I shan’t come up. Can you imagine me—serving mass twice a week,

helping at tea parties for shy Catholic freshmen, dining with the visiting

lecturer at the Newman, drinking a glass of port when we have guests, with

Mgr Bell’s eye on me to see I don’t get too much, being explained, when I

was out of the room, as the rather embarrassing local inebriate who’s being

taken in because his mother is so charming?”

“我不上来。你能想象我吗——每周两次做弥撒，在茶话会上为害

羞的天主教新生提供帮助，在纽曼与客座讲师共进晚餐，当我们有客

人时喝一杯波特酒，当我离开房间时，贝尔主教的眼睛看着我，看看

我没有得到太多，被解释，作为相当尴尬的当地醉汉，因为他的母亲

太迷人而被收留了？

“I told her it wouldn’t do,” I said.

“我告诉她这不行，”我说。

“Shall we get really drunk tonight?”

“我们今晚真的喝醉了吗？”

“It’s the one time it could do no conceivable harm,” I said.

“这是它不会造成任何伤害的一次，”我说。

“Contra mundum?”

“

魂斗罗？

”

“Contra mundum.”

“Contra mundum

。

”

“Bless you, Charles. There aren’t many evenings left to us.”

“祝福你，查尔斯。留给我们的夜晚不多了。

And that night, the first time for many weeks, we got deliriously drunk

together; I saw him to the gate as all the bells were striking midnight, and

reeled back to my rooms under a starry heaven which swam dizzily among

the towers, and fell asleep in my clothes as I had not done for a year.

那天晚上，几个星期以来的第一次，我们一起喝得酩酊大醉;我看

到他走到门口，所有的钟声都在午夜敲响，然后回到我的房间，在星

空下，在塔楼之间晕眩地游动，穿着衣服睡着了，就像我一年没有做

过的那样。

Next day Lady Marchmain left Oxford, taking Sebastian with her.

Brideshead and I went to his rooms to sort out what he would have sent on

and what leave behind.

第二天，马奇曼夫人带着塞巴斯蒂安离开了牛津。布里德斯黑德和我

去他的房间，整理他要送的东西和留下的东西。

Brideshead was as grave and impersonal as ever. “It’s a pity Sebastian

doesn’t know Mgr Bell better,” he said. “He’d find him a charming man to

live with. I was there my last year. My mother believes Sebastian is a

confirmed drunkard. Is he?”

布里德斯黑德一如既往地严肃和没有人情味。“可惜塞巴斯蒂安并

不了解贝尔主教，”他说。“他会觉得他是一个很有魅力的男人。我去

年在那里。我母亲认为塞巴斯蒂安是一个公认的酒鬼。是他吗？

“He’s in danger of becoming one.”

“他有成为其中一员的危险。”

“I believe God prefers drunkards to a lot of respectable people.”

“我相信上帝更喜欢酒鬼，而不是很多受人尊敬的人。

“For God’s sake,” I said, for I was near to tears that morning, “why

bring God into everything?”

“看在上帝的份上，”我说，因为那天早上我几乎要流泪了，“为什

么要把上帝带进一切呢？

“I’m sorry. I forgot. But you know that’s an extremely funny question.”

“对不起。我忘了。但你知道这是一个非常有趣的问题。

“Is it?”

“是吗？”

“To me. Not to you.”

“对我来说。不是给你的。

“No, not to me. It seems to me that without your religion Sebastian

would have the chance to be a happy and healthy man.”

“不，不是给我的。在我看来，如果没有你的宗教，塞巴斯蒂安将

有机会成为一个快乐和健康的人。

“It’s arguable,” said Brideshead. “Do you think he will need this

elephant’s foot again?”

“这是有争议的，”布里德斯黑德说。“你认为他会再次需要这只大

象的脚吗？”

That evening I went across the quad to visit Collins. He was alone with

his texts, working by the failing light at his open window. “Hullo,” he said.

“Come in. I haven’t seen you all the term. I’m afraid I’ve nothing to offer

you. Why have you deserted the smart set?”

那天晚上，我穿过四边形去拜访柯林斯。他独自一人写着他的文

字，在他敞开的窗户上昏暗的灯光下工作。“Hullo，”他说。“进来

吧。我整个学期都没见过你。恐怕我没有什么可以给你的。你为什么

要抛弃智能套装？

“I’m the loneliest man in Oxford,” I said. “Sebastian Flyte’s been sent

down.”

“我是牛津最孤独的人，”我说。“塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特（Sebastian

Flyte）被派下来了。”

Presently I asked him what he was doing in the long vacation. He told

me; it sounded excruciatingly dull. Then I asked him if he had got digs for

next term. Yes, he told me, rather far out but very comfortable. He was

sharing with Tyngate, the secretary of the college Essay Society.

现在我问他在长假里做什么。他告诉我;这听起来非常沉闷。然后

我问他下学期有没有挖。是的，他告诉我，很远，但很舒服。他正在

与大学论文协会的秘书廷盖特分享。

“There’s one room we haven’t filled yet. Barker was coming, but he

feels, now he’s standing for president of the Union, he ought to be nearer

in.”

“有一个房间我们还没有填满。巴克来了，但他觉得，现在他竞选

联盟主席，他应该更接近。

It was in both our minds that perhaps I might take that room.

在我们俩的脑海中，也许我可能会占据那个房间。

“Where are you going?”

“你要去哪里？”

“I was going to Merton Street with Sebastian Flyte. That’s no use now.”

“我和塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特（Sebastian Flyte）一起去默顿街。现在没

用了。

Still neither of us made the suggestion and the moment passed. When I

left he said: “I hope you find someone for Merton Street,” and I said, “I

hope you find someone for the Iffley Road,” and I never spoke to him

again.

尽管如此，我们俩都没有提出这个建议，那一刻过去了。当我离开

时，他说：“我希望你能为默顿街找到一个人，”我说，“我希望你能为

伊夫利路找到一个人，”我再也没有和他说话。

There was only ten days of term to go; I got through them somehow and

returned to London as I had done in such different circumstances the year

before, with no plans made.

学期只剩下十天了;我以某种方式度过了难关，回到了伦敦，就像

我前一年在如此不同的情况下所做的那样，没有制定任何计划。

“That very good-looking friend of yours,” asked my father. “Is he not

with you?”

“你那个长得很漂亮的朋友，”我父亲问。“他不和你在一起吗？”

“No.”

“没有。”

“I quite thought he had taken this over as his home. I’m sorry, I liked

him.”

“我以为他已经把这里当成了自己的家。对不起，我喜欢他。

“Father, do you particularly want me to take my degree?”

“父亲，你是不是特别想让我拿学位？”

“I want you to? Good gracious, why should I want such a thing? No use

to me. Not much use to you either, as far as I’ve seen.”

“我要你吗？好客气，我为什么要这样的东西？对我没用。据我所

知，对你也没有多大用处。

“That’s exactly what I’ve been thinking. I thought perhaps it was rather

a waste of time going back to Oxford.”

“这正是我一直在想的。我想也许回到牛津是浪费时间。

Until then my father had taken only a limited interest in what I was

saying: now he put down his book, took off his spectacles, and looked at me

hard. “You’ve been sent down,” he said. “My brother warned me of this.”

在那之前，我父亲对我说的话兴趣不大：现在他放下书，摘下眼

镜，狠狠地看着我。“你被派下来了，”他说。“我哥哥警告过我。”

“No, I’ve not.”

“不，我没有。”

“Well, then, what’s all the talk about?” he asked testily, resuming his

spectacles, searching for his place on the page. “Everyone stays up at least

three years. I knew one man who took seven to get a pass degree in

theology.”

“那么，这到底是怎么回事呢？”他试探地问道，继续戴着眼镜，在

书页上寻找自己的位置。“每个人都至少熬夜三年。我认识一个人，他

花了七分钱才拿到神学及格学位。

“I only thought that if I was not going to take up one of the professions

where a degree is necessary, it might be best to start now on what I intend

doing. I intend to be a painter.”

“我只是想，如果我不打算从事需要学位的职业之一，最好现在就

开始我打算做的事情。我打算成为一名画家。

But to this my father made no answer at the time.

但对此，我父亲当时没有回答。

The idea, however, seemed to take root in his mind; by the time we

spoke of the matter again it was firmly established.

然而，这个想法似乎在他的脑海中扎根。当我们再次谈到这个问题

时，它已经牢固地确立了。

“When you’re a painter,” he said at Sunday luncheon, “you’ll need a

studio.”

“当你是一名画家时，”他在周日的午餐会上说，“你需要一个工作

室。

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Well, there isn’t a studio here. There isn’t even a room you could use

decently as a studio. I’m not going to have you painting in the gallery.”

“嗯，这里没有工作室。甚至没有一个房间可以像样地用作工作

室。我不会让你在画廊里画画的。

“No. I never meant to.”

“不。我从来没想过要这样做。

“Nor will I have undraped models all over the house, nor critics with

their horrible jargon. And I don’t like the smell of turpentine. I presume you

intend to do the thing thoroughly and use oil paint?” My father belonged to

a generation which divided painters into the serious and the amateur,

according as they used oil or water.

“我也不会在房子里到处都是没有衣服的模特，也不会有评论家用

他们可怕的行话。而且我不喜欢松节油的味道。我猜你打算把这件事

彻底做完，用油画颜料？我父亲属于将画家分为严肃画家和业余画家

的一代人，根据他们使用的油或水。

“I don’t suppose I should do much painting the first year. Anyway, I

should be working at a school.”

“我不认为我应该在第一年画太多画。无论如何，我应该在学校工

作。

“Abroad?” asked my father hopefully. “There are some excellent schools

abroad, I believe.”

“在国外吗？”我父亲满怀希望地问。“我相信国外有一些优秀的学

校。”

It was all happening rather faster than I intended.

这一切发生得比我预期的要快得多。

“Abroad or here. I should have to look round first.”

“在国外或这里。我应该先环顾四周。

“Look round abroad,” he said.

“看看国外，”他说。

“Then you agree to my leaving Oxford?”

“那你同意我离开牛津吗？”

“Agree? Agree? My dear boy, you’re twenty-two.”

“同意吗？同意？我亲爱的孩子，你二十二岁了。

“Twenty,” I said, “twenty-one in October.”

“二十，”我说，“十月二十一。

“Is that all? It seems much longer.”

“仅此而已吗？它似乎要长得多。

A letter from Lady Marchmain completes this episode.

马奇曼夫人的一封信为这一集画上了圆满的句号。

“My dear Charles,” she wrote, “Sebastian left me this morning to join

his father abroad. Before he went I asked him if he had written to you. He

said no, so I must write, tho’ I can hardly hope to say in a letter what I

could not say on our last walk. But you must not be left in silence.

“

我亲爱的查尔斯，

”

她写道，

“

塞巴斯蒂安今天早上离开了我，去

国外与他的父亲团聚。在他走之前，我问他有没有给你写信。他说不

行，所以我必须写信，我几乎不能指望在一封信中说出我们上次散步

时我不能说的话。但你不能保持沉默。

“The college has sent Sebastian down for a term only, and will take him

back after Christmas on condition he goes to live with Mgr Bell. It is for

him to decide. Meanwhile Mr. Samgrass has very kindly consented to take

charge of him. As soon as his visit to his father is over Mr. Samgrass will

pick him up and they will go together to the Levant, where Mr. Samgrass

has long been anxious to investigate a number of orthodox monasteries. He

hopes this may be a new interest for Sebastian.

“

学院只把塞巴斯蒂安送了一个学期，圣诞节后会把他带回去，条

件是他去和贝尔主教住在一起。这是由他决定的。与此同时，萨姆格

拉斯先生非常友善地同意照顾他。一旦他结束了对父亲的探访，萨姆

格拉斯先生就会来接他，他们将一起去黎凡特，萨姆格拉斯先生长期

以来一直急于调查一些东正教修道院。他希望这可能是塞巴斯蒂安的

新兴趣。

“Sebastian’s stay here has not been happy.

“

塞巴斯蒂安在这里住得并不愉快。

“When they come home at Christmas I know Sebastian will want to see

you, and so shall we all. I hope your arrangements for next term have not

been too much upset and that everything will go well with you.

“

当他们圣诞节回家时，我知道塞巴斯蒂安会想见你，我们也会。

我希望你对下学期的安排不要太过不安，一切都会顺利。

Yours sincerely,

此致

Teresa Marchmain.

特蕾莎

马奇曼。

“I went to the garden-room this morning and was so very sorry.”

“我今天早上去了花园房间，非常抱歉。

BOOK TWO

第二册

Brideshead Deserted

（布里德斯黑德酒店）

One

And when we reached the top of the pass,” said Mr. Samgrass, “we heard

the galloping horses behind, and two soldiers rode up to the head of the

caravan and turned us back. The General had sent them, and they reached

us only just in time. There was a Band, not a mile ahead.”

当我们到达山口的顶端时，“萨姆格拉斯先生说，”我们听到后面的马

匹疾驰，两个士兵骑着马来到商队的头上，把我们赶了回来。将军派

他们来了，他们正好赶到我们这里。有一个乐队，在前方不到一英

里。

He paused, and his small audience sat silent, conscious that he had

sought to impress them but in doubt as to how they could politely show

their interest.

他停顿了一下，他的小听众沉默地坐着，意识到他试图给他们留下

深刻印象，但不知道他们如何礼貌地表现出他们的兴趣。

“A Band?” said Julia. “Goodness!”

“一个乐队？”茱莉亚说。“天哪！”

Still he seemed to expect more. At last Lady Marchmain said, “I

suppose the sort of folk-music you get in those parts is very monotonous.”

不过，他似乎期待更多。最后，马奇曼夫人说：“我想你在那些地

方听到的那种民间音乐是非常单调的。

“Dear Lady Marchmain, a Band of Brigands.” Cordelia, beside me on

the sofa, began to giggle noiselessly. “The mountains are full of them.

Stragglers from Kemal’s army; Greeks who got cut off in the retreat. Very

desperate fellows, I assure you.”

“亲爱的马奇曼夫人，一群强盗。”科黛莉亚坐在我旁边的沙发上，

开始无声地咯咯笑。“山上到处都是它们。凯末尔军队中的散兵游勇;

在撤退中被切断的希腊人。非常绝望的家伙，我向你保证。

“Do pinch me,” whispered Cordelia.

“掐我，”科迪莉亚低声说。

I pinched her and the agitation of the sofa-springs ceased. “Thanks,” she

said, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.

我捏了捏她，沙发弹簧的搅动停止了。“谢谢，”她说，用手背擦了

擦眼睛。

“So you never got to wherever-it-was,” said Julia. “Weren’t you terribly

disappointed, Sebastian?”

“所以你从来没有去过它所在的地方，”朱莉娅说。“塞巴斯蒂安，

你不是很失望吗？”

“Me?” said Sebastian from the shadows beyond the lamplight, beyond

the warmth of the burning logs, beyond the family circle, and the

photographs spread out on the card-table. “Me? Oh, I don’t think I was

there that day, was I, Sammy?”

“我？”塞巴斯蒂安说，在灯光之外的阴影中，在燃烧的原木的温暖

之外，在家庭圈子之外，在卡片桌上摊开的照片之外。“我？噢，我想

那天我不在那里，是吗，萨米？

“That was the day you were ill.”

“那是你生病的那天。”

“I was ill,” he repeated like an echo, “so I never should have got to

wherever-it-was, should I, Sammy?”

“我病了，”他像回声一样重复了一遍，“所以我永远不应该去任何

地方，对吧，萨米？”

“Now this, Lady Marchmain, is the caravan at Aleppo in the courtyard

of the inn. That’s our Armenian cook, Begedbian; that’s me on the pony;

that’s the tent folded up; that’s a rather tiresome Kurd who would follow us

about at the time…. Here I am in Pontus, Ephesus, Trebizond, Krak-des-

chevaliers, Samothrace, Batum—of course, I haven’t got them in

chronological order yet.”

“现在，马奇曼夫人，这是在阿勒颇旅馆院子里的大篷车。那是我

们的亚美尼亚厨师，Begedbian;那是骑在小马上的我;那是折叠起来的

帐篷;那是一个相当令人厌烦的库尔德人，他当时会跟着我们......我在

本都、以弗所、特拉比松、克拉克德骑士、萨莫色雷斯、巴图姆——

当然，我还没有按时间顺序排列它们。

“All guides and ruins and mules,” said Cordelia. “Where’s Sebastian?”

“所有的向导、废墟和骡子，”科迪莉亚说。“塞巴斯蒂安在哪儿？”

“He,” said Mr. Samgrass, with a hint of triumph in his voice, as though

he had expected the question and prepared the answer, “he held the camera.

He became quite an expert as soon as he learned not to put his hand over

the lens, didn’t you, Sebastian?”

“他，”萨姆格拉斯先生说，声音里带着一丝胜利，仿佛他已经预料

到了这个问题，并准备好了答案，“他拿着相机。一旦他学会了不把手

放在镜头上，他就成了相当的专家，不是吗，塞巴斯蒂安？

There was no answer from the shadows. Mr. Samgrass delved again into

his pigskin satchel.

阴影中没有回答。萨姆格拉斯先生又钻进了他的猪皮挎包里。

“Here,” he said, “is a group taken by a street photographer on the terrace

of the St. George Hotel at Beirut. There’s Sebastian.”

“这是，”他说，“是一群街头摄影师在贝鲁特圣乔治酒店的露台上

拍摄的。还有塞巴斯蒂安。

“Why,” I said, “there’s Anthony Blanche, surely?”

“为什么，”我说，“肯定是安东尼·布兰奇吗？

“Yes, we saw quite a lot of him; met him by chance at Constantinople. A

delightful companion. I can’t think how I missed knowing him. He came

with us all the way to Beirut.”

“是的，我们看到了很多他;在君士坦丁堡偶然遇见了他。一个令人

愉快的伴侣。我想不出我是多么想念认识他。他和我们一路来到贝鲁

特。

Tea had been cleared away and the curtains drawn. It was two days after

Christmas, the first evening of my visit; the first, too, of Sebastian’s and Mr.

Samgrass’s, whom to my surprise I had found on the platform when I

arrived.

茶已经被清理干净，窗帘也被拉上了。那是圣诞节后的两天，我访

问的第一个晚上;塞巴斯蒂安和萨姆格拉斯先生也是第一个，令我惊讶

的是，当我到达时，我在平台上发现了他们。

Lady Marchmain had written three weeks before: “I have just heard

from Mr. Samgrass that he and Sebastian will be home for Christmas as we

hoped. I had not heard from them for so long that I was afraid they were

lost and did not want to make any arrangements until I knew. Sebastian will

be longing to see you. Do come to us for Christmas if you can manage it, or

as soon after as you can.”

马奇曼夫人在三周前写道：“我刚刚从萨姆格拉斯先生那里听说，

他和塞巴斯蒂安将如我们希望的那样回家过圣诞节。我已经很久没有

收到他们的消息了，我担心他们迷路了，在我知道之前不想做任何安

排。塞巴斯蒂安会渴望见到你。如果你能做到的话，一定要来我们这

里过圣诞节，或者尽快过圣诞节。

Christmas with my uncle was an engagement I could not break, so I

travelled across country and joined the local train midway, expecting to find

Sebastian already established; there he was, however, in the next carriage to

mine, and when I asked him what he was doing, Mr. Samgrass replied with

such glibness and at such length, telling me of mislaid luggage and of

Cook’s being shut over the holidays, that I was at once aware of some other

explanation which was being withheld.

和叔叔的圣诞节是我无法打破的约定，所以我穿越了全国，中途加

入了当地的火车，希望找到塞巴斯蒂安已经建立起来了;然而，他就在

我家的下一节车厢里，当我问他在做什么时，萨姆格拉斯先生回答得

那么轻描淡写，那么长篇大论，告诉我行李放错了地方，库克在假期

里被关门了，我立刻意识到还有其他一些解释被隐瞒了。

Mr. Samgrass was not at ease; he maintained all the physical habits of

self-confidence, but guilt hung about him like stale cigar smoke, and in

Lady Marchmain’s greeting of him I caught a note of anticipation. He kept

up a lively account of his tour during tea, and then Lady Marchmain drew

him away with her, upstairs, for a “little talk.” I watched him go with

something near compassion; it was plain to anyone with a poker sense that

Mr. Samgrass held a very imperfect hand and, as I watched him at tea, I

began to suspect that he was not only bluffing but cheating. There was

something he must say, did not want to say, and did not quite know how to

say to Lady Marchmain about his doings over Christmas, but, more than

that, I guessed, there was a great deal he ought to say and had no intention

at all of saying, about the whole Levantine tour.

萨姆格拉斯先生不放心;他保持着自信的所有身体习惯，但内疚感

像陈旧的雪茄烟雾一样笼罩着他，在马奇曼夫人对他的问候中，我看

到了期待的音符。他在喝茶时生动地叙述了他的旅行，然后马奇曼夫

人把他拉到楼上去“闲聊”。我看着他带着一种近乎同情的东西走了;任

何有扑克意识的人都清楚，萨姆格拉斯先生的手牌非常不完美，当我

在喝茶时看着他时，我开始怀疑他不仅在虚张声势，而且在作弊。有

些话他必须说，不想说，也不知道该如何对马奇曼夫人说他在圣诞节

期间的所作所为，但是，不仅如此，我猜，关于整个黎凡特之行，他

应该说很多，而且根本不打算说。

“Come and see nanny,” said Sebastian.

“来看看保姆，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“Please, can I come, too?” said Cordelia.

“拜托，我也可以来吗？”科迪莉亚说。

“Come on.”

“来吧。”

We climbed to the nursery in the dome. On the way Cordelia said:

“Aren’t you at all pleased to be home?”

我们爬到圆顶的托儿所。在路上，科迪莉亚说：“你回家一点也不

高兴吗？

“Of course I’m pleased,” said Sebastian.

“我当然很高兴，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“Well, you might show it a bit. I’ve been looking forward to it so much.”

“好吧，你可以展示一下。我一直非常期待它。

Nanny did not particularly wish to be talked to; she liked visitors best

when they paid no attention to her and let her knit away, and watch their

faces and think of them as she had known them as small children; their

present goings-on did not signify much beside those early illnesses and

crimes.

保姆并不特别希望被人说话;她最喜欢来访者不理她，任由她编

织，看着他们的脸，把他们当成小孩子一样;除了那些早期的疾病和罪

行之外，他们现在的情况并没有多大意义。

“Well,” she said, “you are looking peaky. I expect it’s all that foreign

food doesn’t agree with you. You must fatten up now you’re back. Looks as

though you’d been having some late nights, too, by the look of your eyes—

dancing, I suppose.” (It was ever Nanny Hawkins’s belief that the upper

classes spent most of their leisure evenings in the ballroom.) “And that shirt

wants darning. Bring it to me before it goes to the wash.”

“嗯，”她说，“你看起来很巅峰。我想这都是外国食物不同意你的

看法。现在你回来了，你必须变胖。从你的眼神来看，你似乎也熬到

了深夜——我想是在跳舞。（南尼·霍金斯（Nanny Hawkins）一直认

为，上层阶级的大部分休闲夜晚都是在舞厅度过的。“那件衬衫想要亲

爱的。在它去洗之前把它拿给我。

Sebastian certainly did look ill; five months had wrought the change of

years in him. He was paler, thinner, pouchy under the eyes, drooping in the

corners of his mouth and he showed the scars of a boil on the side of his

chin; his voice seemed flatter and his movements alternately listless and

jumpy; he looked down-at-heel, too, with clothes and hair, which formerly

had been happily negligent, now unkempt; worst of all, there was a

wariness in his eye which I had surprised there at Easter, and which now

seemed habitual to him.

塞巴斯蒂安看起来确实病了。五个月的时间里，他的岁月发生了变

化。他脸色苍白，瘦弱，眼底凹凸不平，嘴角下垂，下巴一侧有疖子

的疤痕;他的声音似乎更平淡，他的动作交替无精打采和跳跃;他也低

头看了看，衣服和头发，以前是快乐的疏忽，现在蓬头垢面;最糟糕的

是，他的眼睛里有一种警惕，我在复活节时曾感到惊讶，现在对他来

说似乎已经习惯了。

Restrained by this wariness I asked him nothing of himself, but told him

instead about my autumn and winter. I told him about my rooms in the Île

Saint-Louis and the art school, and how good the old teachers were and

how bad the students.

在这种谨慎的克制下，我没有问他关于自己的事，而是告诉了他我

的秋天和冬天。我告诉他我在圣路易岛的房间和艺术学校，以及老老

师有多好，学生有多糟糕。

“They never go near the Louvre,” I said, “or, if they do, it’s only because

one of their absurd reviews has suddenly “discovered” a master who fits in

with that month’s aesthetic theory. Half of them are out to make a popular

splash like Picabia; the other half quite simply want to earn their living

doing advertisements for Vogue and decorating night clubs. And the

teachers still go on trying to make them paint like Delacroix.”

“他们从来不去卢浮宫附近，”我说，“或者，即使他们去了，那只

是因为他们的一篇荒谬的评论突然”发现“了一位符合那个月美学理论

的大师。他们中的一半是为了像 Picabia 一样引起轰动;另一半只是想

靠为《Vogue》做广告和装饰夜总会来谋生。老师们仍然试图让他们

像德拉克洛瓦一样画画。

“Charles,” said Cordelia, “Modern Art is all bosh, isn’t it?”

“查尔斯，”科迪莉亚说，“现代艺术全是波什，不是吗？

“Great bosh.”

“太棒了。”

“Oh, I’m so glad. I had an argument with one of our nuns and she said

we shouldn’t try and criticize what we didn’t understand. Now I shall tell

her I have had it straight from a real artist, and snubs to her.”

“哦，我很高兴。我和我们的一位修女发生了争执，她说我们不应

该试图批评我们不理解的东西。现在我要告诉她，我是直接从一位真

正的艺术家那里得到的，并冷落了她。

Presently it was time for Cordelia to go to her supper, and for Sebastian

and me to go down to the drawing-room for our cocktails. Brideshead was

there alone, but Wilcox followed on our heels to say to him: “Her Ladyship

would like to speak to you upstairs, my Lord.”

现在是科迪莉亚去吃晚饭的时候了，塞巴斯蒂安和我去客厅喝鸡尾

酒了。布里德斯黑德独自一人在那里，但威尔科克斯跟在我们身后对

他说：“大人，她想在楼上和你说话。

“That’s unlike mummy, sending for anyone. She usually lures them up

herself.”

“这不像木乃伊，派人去找人。她通常自己引诱他们。

There was no sign of the cocktail tray. After a few minutes Sebastian

rang the bell. A footman answered. “Mr. Wilcox is upstairs with her

Ladyship.”

没有鸡尾酒托盘的迹象。几分钟后，塞巴斯蒂安按响了门铃。一个

仆人回答。“威尔科克斯先生和她的夫人在楼上。”

“Well, never mind, bring in the cocktail things.”

“好吧，没关系，把鸡尾酒的东西拿进来。”

“Mr. Wilcox has the keys, my Lord.”

“威尔科克斯先生有钥匙，大人。”

“Oh… well, send him in with them when he comes down.”

“哦......好吧，等他下来的时候，把他和他们一起送进去。

We talked a little about Anthony Blanche—“He had a beard in Istanbul,

but I made him take it off”—and after ten minutes Sebastian said: “Well, I

don’t want a cocktail, anyway; I’m off to my bath,” and left the room.

我们聊了聊安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）——“他在伊斯坦布

尔留了胡子，但我让他把胡子摘掉了”——十分钟后，塞巴斯蒂安说：

“好吧，反正我不想喝鸡尾酒;我去洗澡了，“然后离开了房间。

It was half past seven; I supposed the others had gone to dress, but, as I

was going to follow them, I met Brideshead coming down.

当时是七点半;我以为其他人都去穿衣服了，但是，当我要跟着他

们走时，我遇到了新娘头下来了。

“Just a moment, Charles, there’s something I’ve got to explain. My

mother has given orders that no drinks are to be left in any of the rooms.

You’ll understand why. If you want anything, ring and ask Wilcox—only

better wait until you’re alone. I’m sorry, but there it is.”

“等一下，查尔斯，我有件事要解释一下。我母亲已经下令，任何

房间都不能留下饮料。你会明白为什么。如果你想要什么，打电话问

威尔科克斯——最好等到你一个人的时候再说。对不起，但事实就是

如此。

“Is that necessary?”

“有必要吗？”

“I gather very necessary. You may or may not have heard, Sebastian had

another outbreak as soon as he got back to England. He was lost over

Christmas. Mr. Samgrass only found him yesterday evening.”

“我收集非常必要。你可能听说过，也可能没有听说过，塞巴斯蒂

安一回到英国就又爆发了一次疫情。他在圣诞节期间迷路了。萨姆格

拉斯先生昨天晚上才找到他。

“I guessed something of the kind had happened. Are you sure this is the

best way of dealing with it?”

“我猜发生了类似的事情。你确定这是最好的处理方法吗？

“It’s my mother’s way. Will you have a cocktail, now that he’s gone

upstairs?”

“这是我母亲的方式。现在他上楼了，你要喝鸡尾酒吗？

“It would choke me.”

“这会让我窒息。”

I was always given the room I had on my first visit; it was next to

Sebastian’s, and we shared what had once been a dressing-room and had

been changed to a bathroom twenty years back by the substitution for the

bed of a deep, copper, mahogany-framed bath, that was filled by pulling a

brass lever heavy as a piece of marine engineering; the rest of the room

remained unchanged; a coal fire always burned there in winter. I often think

of that bathroom—the water colors dimmed by steam and the huge towel

warming on the back of the chintz armchair—and contrast it with the

uniform, clinical, little chambers, glittering with chromium-plate and

looking-glass, which pass for luxury in the modern world.

我总是得到我第一次访问的房间;它紧挨着塞巴斯蒂安的房间，我

们共用一个曾经是更衣室的地方，二十年前被改成浴室，取而代之的

是一个深的、铜制的、桃花心木框架的浴缸的床，里面装满了一根像

海洋工程一样沉重的黄铜杠杆;房间的其余部分保持不变;冬天总是在

那里燃烧煤火。我经常想起那间浴室——被蒸汽熏得黯淡的水彩和印

花棉布扶手椅靠背上温暖的大毛巾——与那些统一的、临床的、闪闪

发光的小房间形成鲜明对比，镀铬板和镜子在现代世界里被认为是奢

侈品。

I lay in the bath and then dried slowly by the fire, thinking all the time of

my friend’s black home-coming. Then I put on my dressing gown and went

to Sebastian’s room, entering, as I always did, without knocking. He was

sitting by his fire half-dressed, and he started angrily when he heard me and

put down a tooth glass.

我躺在浴缸里，然后在火堆旁慢慢擦干，一直想着我朋友的黑色回

家。然后我穿上睡袍，去了塞巴斯蒂安的房间，像往常一样，没有敲

门。他半身不遂地坐在火炉旁，听到我的话，他生气地放下了牙杯。

“Oh, it’s you. You gave me a fright.”

“哦，是你。你吓死我了。

“So you got a drink,” I said.

“所以你喝了一杯，”我说。

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“我不明白你的意思。”

“For Christ’s sake,” I said, “you don’t have to pretend with me! You

might offer me some.”

“看在基督的份上，”我说，“你不必和我假装！你可以给我一些。

“It’s just something I had in my flask. I’ve finished it now.”

“这只是我烧瓶里的东西。我现在已经完成了。

“What’s going on?”

“这是怎么回事？”

“Nothing. A lot. I’ll tell you some time.”

“没什么。好多。我一会儿再告诉你。

I dressed and called in for Sebastian, but found him still sitting as I had

left him, half-dressed over his fire.

我穿好衣服，叫来塞巴斯蒂安，却发现他仍然像我离开他时一样坐

着，半身不遂地坐在火堆上。

Julia was alone in the drawing-room.

茱莉亚独自一人在客厅里。

“Well,” I asked, “what’s going on?”

“嗯，”我问，“这是怎么回事？

“Oh, just another boring family potin. Sebastian got tight again, so

we’ve all got to keep an eye on him. It’s too tedious.”

“哦，又是一个无聊的家庭锅。塞巴斯蒂安又紧张起来了，所以我

们都必须密切关注他。这太乏味了。

“It’s pretty boring for him, too.”

“这对他来说也很无聊。”

“Well, it’s his fault. Why can’t he behave like anyone else? Talking of

keeping an eye on people, what about Mr. Samgrass? Charles, do you notice

anything at all fishy about that man?”

“嗯，这是他的错。为什么他不能表现得像其他人一样？说到盯

人，萨姆格拉斯先生呢？查尔斯，你有没有注意到那个人有什么可疑

之处？

“Very fishy. Do you think your mother saw it?”

“很腥。你觉得妈看到了吗？

“Mummy only sees what suits her. She can’t have the whole household

under surveillance. I’m causing anxiety, too, you know.”

“妈妈只看到适合她的东西。她不能让整个家庭都处于监视之下。

我也会引起焦虑，你知道的。

“I didn’t know,” I said, adding humbly, “I’ve only just come from

Paris,” so as to avoid giving the impression that any trouble she might be in

was not widely notorious.

“我不知道，”我谦虚地补充道，“我刚从巴黎来，”以免给人留下她

可能遇到的任何麻烦并不广为人知的印象。

It was an evening of peculiar gloom. We dined in the Painted Parlour.

Sebastian was late, and so painfully excited were we that I think it was in

all our minds that he would make some sort of low-comedy entrance,

reeling and hiccupping. When he came it was, of course, with perfect

propriety; he apologized, sat in the empty place, and allowed Mr. Samgrass

to resume his monologue, uninterrupted and, it seemed, unheard. Druses,

patriarchs, icons, bed-bugs, Romanesque remains, curious dishes of goat

and sheeps’ eyes, French and Turkish officials—all the catalogue of Near

Eastern travel was provided for our amusement.

那是一个奇特的阴郁的夜晚。我们在彩绘客厅用餐。塞巴斯蒂安迟

到了，我们非常兴奋，我想在我们所有人的脑海中，他会做出某种低

喜剧般的开场，摇摇晃晃，打嗝。当他来的时候，当然是完全有礼貌

的;他道歉，坐在空旷的地方，让萨姆格拉斯先生继续他的独白，没有

被打断，而且似乎没有被听到。德鲁斯、族长、圣像、臭虫、罗马式

遗骸、山羊和绵羊眼睛的奇特菜肴、法国和土耳其官员——所有近东

旅行的目录都是为了我们的娱乐而提供的。

I watched the champagne go round the table. When it came to Sebastian

he said: “I’ll have whisky, please,” and I saw Wilcox glance over his head

to Lady Marchmain and saw her give a tiny, hardly perceptible nod. At

Brideshead they used small individual spirit decanters which held about a

quarter of a bottle, and were always placed, full, before anyone who asked

for it; the decanter which Wilcox put before Sebastian was half-empty.

Sebastian raised it very deliberately, tilted it, looked at it, and then in

silence poured the liquor into his glass, where it covered two fingers. We all

began talking at once, all except Sebastian, so that for a moment Mr.

Samgrass found himself talking to no one, telling the candlesticks about the

Maronites; but soon we fell silent again, and he had the table until Lady

Marchmain and Julia left the room.

我看着香槟在桌子上转来转去。当谈到塞巴斯蒂安时，他说：“请

给我喝威士忌，”我看到威尔科克斯回头看了一眼马奇曼夫人，看到她

微微点了点头，几乎察觉不到。在布里德斯黑德，他们使用小型的独

立烈酒醒酒器，这些醒酒器可容纳大约四分之一的瓶子，并且总是放

在任何要求它的人面前，装满;威尔科克斯放在塞巴斯蒂安面前的醒酒

器是半空的。塞巴斯蒂安非常刻意地举起它，倾斜它，看着它，然后

默默地将酒倒入他的杯子里，它覆盖了两根手指。除了塞巴斯蒂安之

外，我们所有人都开始交谈，所以有那么一会儿，萨姆格拉斯先生发

现自己没有和任何人说话，而是告诉烛台关于马龙派的事;但很快我们

又陷入了沉默，他一直坐在桌子上，直到马奇曼夫人和朱莉娅离开房

间。

“Don’t be long, Bridey,” she said, at the door, as she always said, and

that evening we had no inclination to delay. Our glasses were filled with

port and the decanter was at once taken from the room. We drank quickly

and went to the drawing-room, where Brideshead asked his mother to read,

and she read The Diary of a Nobody with great spirit until ten o’clock, when

she closed the book and said she was unaccountably tired, so tired that she

would not visit the chapel that night.

“别等太久了，布莱迪，”她在门口说，就像她总是说的那样，那天

晚上我们不想耽搁。我们的杯子里装满了波特酒，醒酒器立即从房间

里拿走了。我们很快喝了酒，然后去了客厅，布里德斯黑德让他的母

亲在那里读书，她精神抖擞地读了《一个无名小卒的日记》，直到十

点钟，她合上书，说她莫名其妙地累了，累到那天晚上她不去教堂。

“Who’s hunting tomorrow?” she asked.

“明天谁在打猎？”她问。

“Cordelia,” said Brideshead. “I’m taking that young horse of Julia’s, just

to show him the hounds; I shan’t keep him out more than a couple of

hours.”

“Cordelia，”Brideshead说。“我牵着茱莉亚的那匹小马，只是为了

给他看猎犬;我不能让他在外面呆超过几个小时。

“Rex is arriving some time,” said Julia. “I’d better stay in to greet him.”

“雷克斯过段时间就要到了，”茱莉亚说。“我最好留下来迎接他。”

“Where’s the meet?” said Sebastian suddenly.

“见面在哪里？”塞巴斯蒂安突然说。

“Just here at Flyte St. Mary.”

“就在Flyte St. Mary。”

“Then I’d like to hunt, please, if there’s anything for me.”

“那我想去打猎，拜托，如果有什么东西给我的话。”

“Of course. That’s delightful. I’d have asked you, only you always used

to complain so of being made to go out. You can have Tinkerbell. She’s

been going very nicely this season.”

“当然。这是令人愉快的。我本来想问你的，只是你总是抱怨被逼

出去。你可以有小叮当。她本赛季的表现非常好。

Everyone was suddenly pleased that Sebastian wanted to hunt; it seemed

to undo some of the mischief of the evening. Brideshead rang the bell for

whisky.

每个人都突然为塞巴斯蒂安想要打猎而感到高兴。它似乎消除了当

晚的一些恶作剧。Brideshead敲响了威士忌的铃铛。

“Anyone else want any?”

“还有人想要吗？”

“Bring me some, too,” said Sebastian, and, though it was a footman this

time and not Wilcox, I saw the same exchange of glance and nod between

the servant and Lady Marchmain. Everyone had been warned. The two

drinks were brought in, poured out already in the glasses, like ‘doubles’ at a

bar, and all our eyes followed the tray, as though we were dogs in a dining-

room smelling game.

“也给我拿点来，”塞巴斯蒂安说，虽然这次是仆人，而不是威尔科

克斯，但我看到仆人和马奇曼夫人之间交换了同样的眼神和点头。每

个人都被警告了。两杯饮料被端进来，倒在杯子里，就像酒吧里的“双

打”一样，我们所有的目光都跟着托盘，就好像我们是餐厅里的狗一

样。

The good humor engendered by Sebastian’s wish to hunt persisted,

however; Brideshead wrote out a note for the stables, and we all went to

bed quite cheerfully.

然而，塞巴斯蒂安的狩猎愿望所产生的幽默感仍然存在。布里德斯

黑德给马厩写了一张纸条，我们都愉快地上床睡觉了。

Sebastian got straight to bed; I sat by his fire and smoked a pipe. I said:

“I rather wish I was coming out with you tomorrow.”

塞巴斯蒂安直接上床睡觉;我坐在他的火炉旁，抽着烟斗。我说：

“我宁愿明天和你一起出来。

“Well,” he said, “you wouldn’t see much sport. I can tell you exactly

what I’m going to do. I shall leave Bridey at the first covert, hack over to

the nearest good pub, and spend the entire day quietly soaking in the bar

parlor. If they treat me like a dipsomaniac, they can bloody well have a

dipsomaniac. I hate hunting, anyway.”

“嗯，”他说，“你不会看到太多的运动。我可以确切地告诉你我要

做什么。我会在第一个隐蔽的地方离开布莱迪，到最近的好酒吧去，

然后整天安静地泡在酒吧客厅里。如果他们把我当成一个双性恋者，

他们就可以有一个双性恋者。反正我讨厌打猎。

“Well, I can’t stop you.”

“好吧，我不能阻止你。”

“You can, as a matter of fact—by not giving me any money. They

stopped my banking account, you know, in the summer. It’s been one of my

chief difficulties. I pawned my watch and cigarette case to ensure a happy

Christmas, so I shall have to come to you tomorrow for my day’s

expenses.”

“事实上，你可以——不给我任何钱。你知道，他们在夏天冻结了

我的银行账户。这是我遇到的主要困难之一。我把手表和烟盒典当

了，以确保圣诞节快乐，所以我明天必须来找你支付我一天的开支。

“I won’t. You know perfectly well I can’t.”

“我不会。你很清楚我做不到。

“Won’t you, Charles? Well, I daresay I shall manage on my own

somehow. I’ve got rather clever at that lately—managing on my own. I’ve

had to.”

“你不会吧，查尔斯？好吧，我敢说我会以某种方式自己管理。我

最近在这方面相当聪明——自己管理。我不得不这样做。

“Sebastian, what have you and Mr. Samgrass been up to?”

“塞巴斯蒂安，你和萨姆格拉斯先生最近在做什么？”

“He told you at dinner—ruins and guides and mules, that’s what

Sammy’s been up to. We decided to go our own ways, that’s all. Poor

Sammy’s really behaved rather well so far. I hoped he would keep it up, but

he seems to have been very indiscreet about my happy Christmas. I suppose

he thought if he gave too good an account of me, he might lose his job as

keeper.

“他在晚餐时告诉你——废墟、向导和骡子，这就是萨米一直在做

的事情。我们决定走自己的路，仅此而已。到目前为止，可怜的萨米

真的表现得相当不错。我希望他能坚持下去，但他似乎对我的圣诞快

乐非常轻率。我猜他想，如果他对我的描述太好了，他可能会失去守

门员的工作。

“He makes quite a good thing out of it, you know. I don’t mean that he

steals. I should think he’s fairly honest about money. He certainly keeps an

embarrassing little note-book in which he puts down all the travelers’

checks he cashes and what he spends it on, for mummy and the lawyer to

see. But he wanted to go to all these places, and it’s very convenient for him

to have me to take him in comfort, instead of going as dons usually do. The

only disadvantage was having to put up with my company, and we soon

solved that for him.

“他从中赚了很多东西，你知道的。我不是说他偷东西。我应该认

为他对钱是相当诚实的。他当然保留了一本令人尴尬的小笔记本，上

面记下了他兑现的所有旅行支票以及他花在什么地方，让妈妈和律师

看到。但是他想去所有这些地方，让我舒适地带他，而不是像往常一

样去，对他来说非常方便。唯一的缺点是不得不忍受我的公司，我们

很快就为他解决了这个问题。

“We began very much on a Grand Tour, you know, with letters to all the

chief people everywhere, and stayed with the Military Governor at Rhodes

and the Ambassador at Constantinople. That was what Sammy had signed

on for in the first place. Of course, he had his work cut out keeping his eye

on me, but he warned all our hosts beforehand that I was not responsible.”

“你知道，我们开始了一次盛大的旅行，给各地的所有酋长写信，

并与罗得岛的军事总督和君士坦丁堡的大使住在一起。这就是萨米最

初签约的。当然，他有他的工作被切断了，他一直盯着我，但他事先

警告我们所有的主人，我不负责任。

“Sebastian.”

“塞巴斯蒂安。”

“Not quite responsible—and as I had no money to spend I couldn’t get

away very much. He even did the tipping for me, put the note into the man’s

hand and jotted the amount down then and there in his note-book. My lucky

time was at Constantinople. I managed to make some money at cards one

evening when Sammy wasn’t looking. Next day I gave him the slip and was

having a very happy hour in the bar at the Tokatlian when who should come

in but Anthony Blanche with a beard and a Jew boy. Anthony lent me a

tenner just before Sammy came panting in and recaptured me. After that I

didn’t get a minute out of sight; the Embassy staff put us in the boat to

Piraeus and watched us sail away. But in Athens it was easy. I simply

walked out of the Legation one day after lunch, changed my money at

Cook’s, and asked about sailings to Alexandria just to fox Sammy, then

went down to the port in a bus, found a sailor who spoke American, lay up

with him till his ship sailed, and popped back to Constantinople, and that

was that.

“不太负责任——而且因为我没有钱花，我不能逃避太多。他甚至

为我做了小费，把纸条放到那个男人的手里，然后在他的笔记本上记

下了金额。我的幸运时光是在君士坦丁堡。一天晚上，我趁萨米不注

意的时候，设法在纸牌上赚了一些钱。第二天，我把纸条给了他，在

托卡特利亚的酒吧里度过了一个非常愉快的时光，除了留着胡子的安

东尼·布兰奇和一个犹太男孩之外，谁应该进来。安东尼借给我一个网

球，就在萨米气喘吁吁地进来并重新抓住我之前。在那之后，我没有

一分钟离开视线;大使馆工作人员把我们送上了去比雷埃夫斯的船，目

送我们扬帆远航。但在雅典，这很容易。一天午饭后，我干脆走出公

使馆，在库克家换了钱，问了去亚历山大港的航行，只是为了狐狸萨

米，然后乘公共汽车下到港口，找到一个会说美国话的水手，和他一

起躺着，直到他的船起航，然后回到君士坦丁堡，仅此而已。

“Anthony and the Jew boy shared a very nice, tumbledown house near

the bazaars. I stayed there till it got too cold, then Anthony and I drifted

south till we met Sammy by appointment in Syria three weeks ago.”

“安东尼和那个犹太男孩在集市附近共用一个非常漂亮的倒塌的房

子。我在那里呆到太冷，然后安东尼和我向南漂流，直到三周前我们

在叙利亚约见了萨米。

“Didn’t Sammy mind?”

“萨米不介意吗？”

“Oh, I think he quite enjoyed himself in his own ghastly way—only of

course there was no more high life for him. I think he was a bit anxious at

first. I didn’t want him to get the whole Mediterranean Fleet out, so I cabled

him from Constantinople that I was quite well and would he send money to

the Ottoman Bank. He came hopping over as soon as he got my cable. Of

course he was in a difficult position, because I’m of age and not certified

yet, so he couldn’t have me arrested. He couldn’t leave me to starve while

he was living on my money, and he couldn’t tell mummy without looking

pretty silly. I had him all ways, poor Sammy. My original idea had been to

leave him flat, but Anthony was very helpful about that, and said it was far

better to arrange things amicably; and he did arrange things very amicably.

So here I am.”

“噢，我想他以自己可怕的方式很享受自己——当然，他不会再过

上高尚的生活了。我想他一开始有点焦虑。我不想让他把整个地中海

舰队都赶出去，所以我从君士坦丁堡给他发了电报，说我很好，他会

不会把钱寄到奥斯曼银行。他一拿到我的电缆就跳了过来。当然，他

的处境很困难，因为我已经成年了，还没有获得认证，所以他不能逮

捕我。他不能让我挨饿，而他靠我的钱生活，他不能告诉妈妈，否则

看起来很傻。我把他弄得一团糟，可怜的萨米。我最初的想法是让他

平淡无奇，但安东尼对此非常有帮助，并说友好地安排事情要好得多;

他确实非常友好地安排了事情。所以我来了。

“After Christmas.”

“圣诞节之后。”

“Yes, I was determined to have a happy Christmas.”

“是的，我下定决心要过一个快乐的圣诞节。”

“Did you?”

“是吗？”

“I think so. I don’t remember it much, and that’s always a good sign,

isn’t it?”

“我想是的。我不太记得了，这总是一个好兆头，不是吗？

Next morning at breakfast Brideshead wore scarlet; Cordelia, very smart

herself, with her chin held high over her white stock, wailed when

Sebastian appeared in a tweed coat: “Oh, Sebastian, you can’t come out like

that. Do go and change. You look so lovely in hunting clothes.”

第二天早上吃早餐时，新娘头穿着猩红色的衣服;科黛莉亚自己非常聪

明，下巴高高举在她的白色袜子上，当塞巴斯蒂安穿着粗花呢大衣出

现时，她哭了起来：“哦，塞巴斯蒂安，你不能这样出来。去做改变

吧。你穿着狩猎服看起来很可爱。

“Locked away somewhere. Gibbs couldn’t find them.”

“被锁在某个地方。吉布斯找不到他们。

“That’s a fib. I helped get them out myself before you were called.”

“那是个fib。在你被召唤之前，我亲自帮他们把他们弄出来了。

“Half the things are missing.”

“东西少了一半。”

“It just encourages the Strickland-Venableses. They’re behaving

rottenly. They’ve even taken their grooms out of top hats.”

“它只是鼓励斯特里克兰-维纳布尔斯。他们表现得很糟糕。他们甚

至把新郎从礼帽上拿下来了。

It was a quarter to eleven before the horses were brought round, but no

one else appeared downstairs; it was as though they were in hiding,

listening for Sebastian’s retreating hooves before showing themselves.

四点半到十一点钟，马匹才被牵过来，但楼下没有其他人出现;就

好像他们躲藏起来一样，听着塞巴斯蒂安后退的蹄声，然后才露面。

Just as he was about to start, when the others were already mounted,

Sebastian beckoned me into the hall. On the table beside his hat, gloves,

whip, and sandwiches, lay the flask he had put out to be filled. He picked it

up and shook it; it was empty.

就在他准备开始的时候，当其他人已经上马时，塞巴斯蒂安招呼我

进入大厅。在他的帽子、手套、鞭子和三明治旁边的桌子上，放着他

拿出来装满的瓶子。他捡起它，摇了摇;它是空的。

“You see,” he said, “I can’t even be trusted that far. It’s they who are

mad, not me. Now you can’t refuse me money.”

“你看，”他说，“我甚至不能被信任那么远。生气的是他们，而不

是我。现在你不能拒绝我的钱。

I gave him a pound.

我给了他一磅。

“More,” he said.

“更多，”他说。

I gave him another and watched him mount and trot after his brother and

sister.

我又给了他一个，看着他骑上马，小跑着跟在他的弟弟和妹妹后

面。

Then, as though it were his cue on the stage, Mr. Samgrass came to my

elbow, put an arm in mine and led me back to the fire. He warmed his neat

little hands and then turned to warm his seat.

然后，仿佛这是他在舞台上的暗示，萨姆格拉斯先生来到我的胳膊

肘上，把一只胳膊放在我的胳膊上，把我带回火堆旁。他温暖了他整

洁的小手，然后转身去温暖他的座位。

“So Sebastian is in pursuit of the fox,” he said, “and our little problem is

shelved for an hour or two?”

“所以塞巴斯蒂安在追捕狐狸，”他说，“我们的小问题被搁置了一

两个小时？”

I was not going to stand this from Mr. Samgrass.

我受不了萨姆格拉斯先生的这种说法。

“I heard all about your Grand Tour, last night,” I said.

“昨晚我听说了你的大巡回赛，”我说。

“Ah, I rather supposed you might have.” Mr. Samgrass was undismayed,

relieved, it seemed, to have someone else in the know. “I did not harrow our

hostess with all that. After all, it turned out far better than one had any right

to expect. I did feel, however, that some explanation was due to her of

Sebastian’s Christmas festivities. You may have observed last night that

there were certain precautions.”

“啊，我倒是以为你可能会知道。” 萨姆格拉斯先生并不惊慌，似乎

松了一口气，因为有其他人知道。“我没有用这一切来打扰我们的女主

人。毕竟，结果比人们所期望的要好得多。然而，我确实觉得，她对

塞巴斯蒂安的圣诞节庆祝活动有一些解释。你昨晚可能已经观察到，

有一些预防措施。

“I did.”

“我做到了。”

“You thought them excessive? I am with you, particularly as they tend to

compromise the comfort of our own little visit. I have seen Lady

Marchmain this morning. You must not suppose I am just out of bed. I have

had a little talk upstairs with our hostess. I think we may hope for some

relaxation tonight. Yesterday was not an evening that any of us would wish

to have repeated. I earned less gratitude than I deserved, I think, for my

efforts to distract you.”

“你觉得他们太过分了？我和你在一起，特别是因为他们往往会损

害我们自己小访问的舒适性。我今天早上见到了马奇曼夫人。你千万

不要以为我刚起床。我在楼上和我们的女主人聊了一会儿。我想我们

今晚可能希望放松一下。昨天不是我们任何人都希望重蹈覆辙的夜

晚。我想，我得到的感激之情比我应得的要少，因为我努力分散你的

注意力。

It was repugnant to me to talk about Sebastian to Mr. Samgrass, but I

was compelled to say: “I’m not sure that tonight would be the best time to

start the relaxation.”

我向萨姆格拉斯先生谈论塞巴斯蒂安是令人反感的，但我不得不

说：“我不确定今晚是否是开始放松的最佳时机。

“But surely? Why not tonight, after a day in the field under Brideshead’s

inquisitorial eye? Could one choose better?”

“但肯定吗？为什么不今晚，在布里德斯黑德的审问眼皮底下在田

野里呆了一天之后呢？能有更好的选择吗？

“Oh, I suppose it’s none of my business really.”

“哦，我想这真的不关我的事。”

“Nor mine strictly, now that he is safely home. Lady Marchmain did me

the honor of consulting me. But it is less Sebastian’s welfare than our own I

have at heart at the moment. I need my third glass of port; I need that

hospitable tray in the library. And yet you specifically advise against it

tonight. I wonder why. Sebastian can come to no mischief today. For one

thing, he has no money. I happen to know. I saw to it. I even have his watch

and cigarette case upstairs. He will be quite harmless… as long as no one is

so wicked as to give him any…. Ah, Lady Julia, good morning to you, good

morning. And how is the peke this hunting morning?”

“严格来说，现在他已经安全回家了。马奇曼夫人很荣幸地向我咨

询。但塞巴斯蒂安的福利不如我们自己福利，我此刻心里想的。我需

要第三杯波特酒;我需要图书馆里那个热情好客的托盘。然而，你今晚

特别建议不要这样做。我想知道为什么。塞巴斯蒂安今天不会搞恶作

剧。一方面，他没有钱。我碰巧知道。我看到了。我甚至在楼上放着

他的手表和烟盒。他会很无害......只要没有人邪恶到给他任何东西......

啊，茱莉亚夫人，早上好，早上好。今天早上打猎怎么样？

“Oh, the peke’s all right. Listen. I’ve got Rex Mottram coming here

today. We simply can’t have another evening like last night. Someone must

speak to mummy.”

“哦，peke没事。听。我今天有雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）来

这里。我们根本不能再像昨晚那样度过另一个夜晚。必须有人和妈妈

说话。

“Someone has. I spoke. I think it will be all right.”

“有人有。我说话了。我想一切都会好起来的。

“Thank God for that. Are you painting today, Charles?”

“为此感谢上帝。你今天在画画吗，查尔斯？

It had been the custom that on every visit to Brideshead I painted a

medallion on the walls of the garden-room. The custom suited me well, for

it gave me a good reason to detach myself from the rest of the party; when

the house was full, the garden-room became a rival to the nursery, where

from time to time people took refuge to complain about the others; thus

without effort I kept in touch with the gossip of the place. There were three

finished medallions now, each rather pretty in its way, but unhappily each in

a different way, for my tastes had changed and I had become more

dexterous in the eighteen months since the series was begun. As a

decorative scheme, they were a failure. That morning was typical of the

many mornings when I had found the garden-room a sanctuary. There I

went and was soon at work. Julia came with me to see me started and we

talked, inevitably, of Sebastian.

按照惯例，每次去布里德斯黑德时，我都会在花园房间的墙上画一

个奖章。这个习俗很适合我，因为它给了我一个很好的理由，让我把

自己从党的其他人中分离出来;当房子满了时，花园房间就成了托儿所

的竞争对手，人们不时在那里避难抱怨其他人;因此，我不费吹灰之力

就与这个地方的八卦保持联系。现在有三枚完成的奖章，每枚都相当

漂亮，但不幸的是，每枚奖章都以不同的方式出现，因为我的品味发

生了变化，而且自该系列开始以来的十八个月里，我变得更加灵巧。

作为一种装饰方案，它们是失败的。那天早上是我发现花园房间成为

避难所的许多早晨的典型早晨。我去了那里，很快就开始工作了。茱

莉亚和我一起来看我开始，我们不可避免地谈到了塞巴斯蒂安。

“Don’t you get bored with the subject?” she asked. “Why must everyone

make such a Thing about it?”

“你不厌倦这个话题吗？”她问。“为什么每个人都必须对它做这样

的事情？”

“Just because we’re fond of him.”

“只是因为我们喜欢他。”

“Well. I’m fond of him too, in a way, I suppose, only I wish he’d behave

like anybody else. I’ve grown up with one family skeleton, you know—

papa. Not to be talked of before the servants, not to be talked of before us

when we were children. If mummy is going to start making a skeleton out

of Sebastian, it’s too much. If he wants to be always tight, why doesn’t he

go to Kenya or somewhere where it doesn’t matter?”

“嗯。我也喜欢他，在某种程度上，我想，只是我希望他能像其他

人一样行事。我从小到大都跟着一个家庭骨架，你知道的——爸爸。

不要在仆人面前谈论，不要在我们小时候在我们面前谈论。如果木乃

伊要开始用塞巴斯蒂安制作骨架，那就太过分了。如果他想一直保持

紧张，他为什么不去肯尼亚或一些无关紧要的地方呢？

“Why does it matter less being unhappy in Kenya than anywhere else?”

“为什么在肯尼亚不快乐比在其他地方更重要？”

“Don’t pretend to be stupid, Charles. You understand perfectly.”

“别装傻，查尔斯。你完全理解。

“You mean there won’t be so many embarrassing situations for you?

Well, all I was trying to say was that I’m afraid there may be an

embarrassing situation tonight if Sebastian gets the chance. He’s in a bad

mood.”

“你是说你不会有那么多尴尬的情况？好吧，我想说的是，如果塞

巴斯蒂安有机会，我担心今晚可能会出现尴尬的局面。他心情不好。

“Oh, a day’s hunting will put that all right.”

“哦，一天的狩猎会好起来的。”

It was touching to see the faith which everybody put in the value of a

day’s hunting. Lady Marchmain, who looked in on me during the morning,

mocked herself for it with that delicate irony for which she was famous.

看到每个人都相信一天的狩猎价值，真是令人感动。马奇曼夫人早

上看着我，用她闻名的那种微妙的讽刺来嘲笑自己。

“I’ve always detested hunting,” she said, “because it seems to produce a

particularly gross kind of caddishness in the nicest people. I don’t know

what it is, but the moment they dress up and get on a horse they become

like a lot of Prussians. And so boastful after it. The evenings I’ve sat at

dinner appalled at seeing the men and women I know, transformed into

half-awake, self-opinionated, monomaniac louts!… and yet, you know—it

must be something derived from centuries ago—my heart is quite light

today to think of Sebastian out with them. “There’s nothing wrong with him

really,” I say, “he’s gone hunting”—as though it were an answer to prayer.”

“我一直讨厌打猎，”她说，“因为它似乎在最善良的人身上产生了

一种特别恶心的球童。我不知道那是什么，但当他们打扮好并骑上马

的那一刻，他们就变得像很多普鲁士人一样。之后如此自夸。晚上，

我坐在晚餐上，震惊地看到我认识的男人和女人变成了半醒半醒、自

以为是、独断专行的疯子...然而，你知道——它一定是几个世纪前的

东西——今天想到塞巴斯蒂安和他们在一起，我的心很轻松。“他真的

没什么不对，”我说，“他去打猎了”——好像这是对祈祷的回应。

She asked me about my life in Paris. I told her of my rooms with their

view of the river and the towers of Notre Dame. “I’m hoping Sebastian will

come and stay with me when I go back.”

她问我在巴黎的生活。我告诉她我的房间，可以看到河流和巴黎圣

母院的塔楼。“我希望塞巴斯蒂安在我回去的时候能来和我在一起。

“It would have been lovely,” said Lady Marchmain, sighing as though

for the unattainable.

“那真是太好了，”马奇曼夫人说，叹了口气，仿佛在为高不可攀的

东西而叹息。

“I hope he’s coming to stay with me in London.”

“我希望他能来伦敦和我一起住。

“Charles, you know it isn’t possible. London’s the worst place. Even Mr.

Samgrass couldn’t hold him there. We have no secrets in this house. He was

lost, you know, all through Christmas. Mr. Samgrass only found him

because he couldn’t pay his bill in the place where he was, so they

telephoned our house. It’s too horrible. No, London is impossible; if he

can’t behave himself here, with us…. We must keep him happy and healthy

here for a bit, hunting, and then send him abroad again with Mr.

Samgrass…. You see, I’ve been through all this before.”

“查尔斯，你知道这是不可能的。伦敦是最糟糕的地方。就连萨姆

格拉斯先生也没办法把他抱在那里。我们在这所房子里没有秘密。你

知道，整个圣诞节他都迷路了。萨姆格拉斯先生之所以找到他，是因

为他无法在他所在的地方支付账单，所以他们打电话给我们家。太可

怕了。不，伦敦是不可能的;如果他不能在这里表现自己，和我们在一

起......我们必须让他在这里快乐和健康一会儿，打猎，然后再把他和萨

姆格拉斯先生一起送到国外。你看，我以前经历过这一切。

The retort was there, unspoken, well-understood by both of us—“You

couldn’t keep him; he ran away. So will Sebastian. Because they both hate

you.”

反驳就在那里，没有说出来，我们俩都听得很清楚——“你不能留

住他;他逃跑了。塞巴斯蒂安也是如此。因为他们都讨厌你。

A horn and the huntsman’s cry sounded in the valley below us.

一声号角和猎人的叫喊声在我们脚下的山谷中响起。

“There they go now, drawing the home woods. I hope he’s having a

good day.”

“他们现在走了，画了家里的树林。我希望他今天过得愉快。

Thus with Julia and Lady Marchmain I reached deadlock, not because

we failed to understand one another, but because we understood too well.

With Brideshead, who came home to luncheon and talked to me on the

subject—for the subject was everywhere in the house like a fire deep in the

hold of a ship, below the water-line, black and red in the darkness, coming

to light in acrid wisps of smoke that oozed under hatches and billowed

suddenly from the scuttles and air pipes—with Brideshead,

Iwasinastrangeworld, adeadworldtome, ina moon-landscape of barren lava,

a high place of toiling lungs.

因此，我和茱莉亚和马奇曼夫人陷入了僵局，不是因为我们彼此不

了解，而是因为我们太了解了。和布里德斯黑德一起，她回家吃午

饭，和我谈起了这个话题——因为这个话题在房子里到处都是，就像

一艘船舱深处的火，在吃水线以下，在黑暗中黑红相间，在一缕缕刺

鼻的烟雾中浮出水面，这些烟雾从舱口渗出，突然从舷窗和气管中滚

滚而出——和布里德斯黑德一起，岩西那奇异世界，一个死寂的世

界，在贫瘠的熔岩的月亮景观中，一个劳作肺的高处。

He said: “I hope it is dipsomania. That is simply a great misfortune that

we must all help him bear. What I used to fear was that he just got drunk

deliberately when he liked and because he liked.”

他说：“我希望这是双性恋。这简直是一个巨大的不幸，我们必须

帮助他承受。我以前担心的是，他只是在他喜欢的时候故意喝醉，因

为他喜欢。

“That’s exactly what he did—what we both did. It’s what he does with

me now. I can keep him to that, if only your mother would trust me. If you

worry him with keepers and cures he’ll be a physical wreck in a few years.”

“这正是他所做的——我们俩都做了。这就是他现在对我所做的。

我可以让他这样做，只要你母亲信任我。如果你用饲养员和治疗方法

来担心他，几年后他就会变成一个身体上的残骸。

“There’s nothing wrong in being a physical wreck, you know. There’s no

moral obligation to be Postmaster-General or Master of Foxhounds or to

live to walk ten miles at eighty.”

“你知道，成为身体上的残骸并没有错。没有道德义务成为邮政局

长或猎狐犬大师，也没有道德义务在八十岁时活着走十英里。

“Wrong,” I said. “Moral obligation—now you’re back on religion

again.”

“错了，”我说。“道德义务——现在你又回到了宗教上。

“I never left it,” said Brideshead.

“我从来没有离开过它，”布里德斯黑德说。

“D’you know, Bridey, if I ever felt for a moment like becoming a

Catholic, I should only have to talk to you for five minutes to be cured. You

manage to reduce what seem quite sensible propositions to stark nonsense.”

“你知道吗，布莱迪，如果我曾经有过想成为天主教徒的时刻，我

只需要和你谈五分钟就可以治愈。你设法将看似非常明智的命题简化

为赤裸裸的胡说八道。

“It’s odd you should say that. I’ve heard it before from other people. It’s

one of the many reasons why I don’t think I should make a good priest. It’s

something in the way my mind works, I suppose.”

“你这么说很奇怪。我以前从其他人那里听说过。这是我认为我不

应该成为一名好牧师的众多原因之一。我想，这是我思维方式中的东

西。

At luncheon Julia had no thoughts except for her guest who was coming

that day. She drove to the station to meet him and brought him home to tea.

午餐时，茱莉亚除了那天要来的客人外，没有任何想法。她开车去

车站接他，带他回家喝茶。

“Mummy, do look at Rex’s Christmas present.”

“妈妈，看看雷克斯的圣诞礼物。”

It was a small tortoise with Julia’s initials set in diamonds in the living

shell, and this slightly obscene object, now slipping impotently on the

polished boards, now striding across the card-table, now lumbering over a

rug, now withdrawn at a touch, now stretching its neck and swaying its

withered, antediluvian head, became a memorable part of the evening, one

of those needlehooks of experience which catch the attention when larger

matters are at stake.

那是一只小，茱莉亚的首字母镶嵌在活生生的贝壳里，这个略显淫

秽的物体，现在无力地滑在抛光的棋盘上，现在大步走过牌桌，现在

笨拙地躺在地毯上，现在一碰就缩回去，现在伸长脖子，摇晃着它枯

萎的、古老的脑袋，成为当晚令人难忘的部分，当更大的事情受到威

胁时，那些引起人们注意的经验针钩之一。

“Dear me,” said Lady Marchmain. “I wonder if it eats the same sort of

things as an ordinary tortoise.”

“亲爱的我，”马奇曼夫人说。“我想知道它是否和普通吃同样的东

西。

“What will you do when it’s dead?” asked Mr. Samgrass. “Can you have

another tortoise fitted into the shell?”

“当它死了，你会怎么做？”萨姆格拉斯先生问。“你能把另一只装

进壳里吗？”

Rex had been told about the problem of Sebastian—he could scarcely

have endured in that atmosphere without—and had a solution pat. He

propounded it cheerfully and openly at tea, and after a day of whispering it

was a relief to hear the thing discussed. “Send him to Borethus at Zürich.

Borethus is the man. He works miracles every day at that sanatorium of his.

You know how Charlie Kilcartney used to drink.”

雷克斯被告知塞巴斯蒂安的问题——如果没有塞巴斯蒂安，他几乎

无法忍受这种气氛——并且有一个解决方案。他在喝茶时兴高采烈地

公开地提出了这个问题，经过一天的窃窃私语，听到讨论这件事，他

松了一口气。“把他送到苏黎世的博雷图斯。Borethus就是这个人。他

每天都在他的疗养院里创造奇迹。你知道查理·基尔卡特尼以前是怎么

喝酒的。

“No,” said Lady Marchmain, with that sweet irony of hers. “No, I’m

afraid I don’t know how Charlie Kilcartney drank.”

“不，”马奇曼夫人说，带着她那种甜蜜的讽刺。“不，恐怕我不知

道查理·基尔卡特尼是怎么喝酒的。

Julia, hearing her lover mocked, frowned at the tortoise, but Rex

Mottram was impervious to such delicate mischief.

茱莉亚听到爱人的嘲笑，皱着眉头看着，但雷克斯·莫特拉姆对这

种微妙的恶作剧无动于衷。

“Two wives despaired of him,” he said. “When he got engaged to

Sylvia, she made it a condition that he should take the cure at Zürich. And it

worked. He came back in three months a different man. And he hasn’t

touched a drop since, even though Sylvia walked out on him.”

“两个妻子对他感到绝望，”他说。“当他与西尔维亚订婚时，她提

出了一个条件，他应该在苏黎世接受治疗。它奏效了。三个月后，他

回来了，变成了一个不同的人。从那以后，他就再也没有碰过一滴

水，即使西尔维亚从他身上走了出来。

“Why did she do that?”

“她为什么要这样做？”

“Well, poor Charlie got rather a bore when he stopped drinking. But

that’s not really the point of the story.”

“好吧，可怜的查理在停止喝酒时感到很无聊。但这并不是故事的

重点。

“No, I suppose not. In fact, I suppose, really, it’s meant to be an

encouraging story.”

“不，我想不是。事实上，我想，真的，这注定是一个鼓舞人心的

故事。

Julia scowled at her jeweled tortoise.

茱莉亚皱着眉头看着她那只镶着宝石的。

“He takes sex cases, too, you know.”

“他也接性案件，你知道的。”

“Oh dear, what very peculiar friends poor Sebastian will make in

Zürich.”

“哦，亲爱的，可怜的塞巴斯蒂安在苏黎世会结交多么奇特的朋

友。

“He’s booked up for months ahead, but I think he’d find room if I asked

him. I could telephone him from here tonight.”

“他已经提前几个月预订了，但我想如果我问他，他会找到空间

的。我今晚可以从这里给他打电话。

(In his kindest moments Rex displayed a kind of hectoring zeal as if he

were thrusting a vacuum cleaner on an unwilling housewife.)

（在他最善良的时刻，雷克斯表现出一种犹豫不决的热情，就好像

他把吸尘器推给一个不情愿的家庭主妇一样。

“We’ll think about it.”

“我们会考虑的。”

And we were thinking about it when Cordelia returned from hunting.

当科迪莉亚打猎回来时，我们正在考虑这件事。

“Oh, Julia, what’s that? How beastly.”

“哦，茱莉亚，那是什么？真是野兽。

“It’s Rex’s Christmas present.”

“这是雷克斯的圣诞礼物。”

“Oh, sorry. I’m always putting my foot in it. But how cruel! It must have

hurt frightfully.”

“哦，对不起。我总是把脚踩进去。但多么残忍！它一定疼得很厉

害。

“They can’t feel.”

“他们感觉不到。”

“How d’you know? Bet they can.”

“你怎么知道的？打赌他们能做到。

She kissed her mother, whom she had not seen that day, shook hands

with Rex, and rang for eggs.

她亲吻了那天没有见过的母亲，与雷克斯握手，并敲响了鸡蛋的铃

声。

“I had one tea at Mrs. Barney’s, where I telephoned for the car, but I’m

still hungry. It was a spiffing day. Jean Strickland-Venables fell in the mud.

We ran from Bengers to Upper Eastrey without a check. I reckon that’s five

miles, don’t you, Bridey?”

“我在巴尼太太家喝了一杯茶，我打电话叫车，但我还是饿了。那

是一个令人毛骨悚然的一天。让·斯特里克兰-维纳布尔斯（Jean

Strickland-Venables）陷入了泥泞。我们从Bengers跑到Upper Eastrey，

没有检查。我估计那是五英里，不是吗，布莱迪？

“Three.”

“三。”

“Not as he ran…” Between mouthfuls of scrambled egg she told us

about the hunt. “… You should have seen Jean when she came out of the

mud.”

“不是他跑的时候......”在一口又一口的炒鸡蛋之间，她向我们讲述

了这次狩猎。"...当吉恩从泥泞中走出来时，你应该看到她。

“Where’s Sebastian?”

“塞巴斯蒂安在哪儿？”

“He’s in disgrace.” The words, in that clear, child’s voice had the ring of

a bell tolling, but she went on: “Coming out in that beastly rat-catcher coat

and mean little tie like something from Captain Morvin’s Riding Academy.

I just didn’t recognize him at the meet, and I hope nobody else did. Isn’t he

back? I expect he got lost.”

“他很丢脸。”这句话，在那清澈的童声中，有铃声的响声，但她继

续说：“穿着那件野兽般的捕鼠大衣，打着小领带，就像莫文上尉的骑

术学院里的东西一样。我只是在见面会上没有认出他，我希望没有其

他人认出他。他不是回来了吗？我估计他迷路了。

When Wilcox came to clear the tea, Lady Marchmain asked: “No sign of

Lord Sebastian?”

当威尔科克斯来清理茶水时，马奇曼夫人问道：“塞巴斯蒂安勋爵

没有迹象吗？

“No, my Lady.”

“不，是我的夫人。”

“He must have stopped for tea with someone. How very unlike him.”

“他一定是停下来和某人喝茶了。多么不像他。

Half an hour later, when Wilcox brought in the cocktail tray, he said:

“Lord Sebastian has just rung up to be fetched from South Twining.”

半小时后，当威尔科克斯把鸡尾酒托盘端进来时，他说：“塞巴斯

蒂安勋爵刚刚起床，准备从南特温宁接来。

“South Twining? Who lives there?”

“南特温宁？谁住在那里？

“He was speaking from the hotel, my Lady.”

“他是在酒店里说话的，我的夫人。

“South Twining?” said Cordelia. “Goodness, he did get lost!”

“南特温宁？”科迪莉亚说。“天哪，他确实迷路了！”

When he arrived he was flushed and his eyes were feverishly bright; I

saw that he was two-thirds drunk.

当他到达时，他满脸通红，眼睛炯炯有神;我看到他喝醉了三分之

二。

“Dear boy,” said Lady Marchmain. “How nice to see you looking so

well again. Your day in the open has done you good. The drinks are on the

table; do help yourself.”

“亲爱的孩子，”马奇曼夫人说。“很高兴看到你又看起来这么好

了。你在户外的一天对你有好处。饮料在桌子上;请帮助自己。

There was nothing unusual in her speech but the fact of her saying it. Six

months ago it would not have been said.

她的讲话中没有什么不寻常的，只是她说了这句话。六个月前不会

说。

“Thanks,” said Sebastian. “I will.”

“谢谢，”塞巴斯蒂安说。“我会的。”

A blow, expected, repeated, falling on a bruise, with no smart or shock of

surprise, only a dull and sickening pain and the doubt whether another like

it could be borne—that was how it felt, sitting opposite Sebastian at dinner

that night, seeing his clouded eye and groping movements, hearing his

thickened voice breaking in, ineptly, after long brutish silences. When at

length Lady Marchmain and Julia and the servants left us, Brideshead said:

“You’d best go to bed, Sebastian.”

一击，意料之中的，重复的，落在瘀伤上，没有聪明或惊讶的震惊，

只有一种沉闷和令人作呕的疼痛，以及是否能承受另一次类似的痛苦

——这就是感觉，那天晚上吃晚饭时坐在塞巴斯蒂安对面，看到他浑

浊的眼睛和摸索的动作，听到他粗重的声音闯进来，无能为力，在长

时间的残酷沉默之后。最后，当马奇曼夫人、茱莉亚和仆人离开我们

时，布里德斯黑德说：“你最好上床睡觉，塞巴斯蒂安。

“Have some port first.”

“先喝点口子。”

“Yes, have some port if you want it. But don’t come into the drawing-

room.”

“是的，如果你想要的话，可以有一些端口。但不要进客厅。

“Too bloody drunk,” said Sebastian nodding heavily. “Like olden times.

Gentlemen always too drunk join ladies in olden times.”

“喝得太醉了，”塞巴斯蒂安重重地点点头说。“就像古代一样。绅

士们总是喝醉了，加入古代的女士们。

(“And yet, you know, it wasn’t,” said Mr. Samgrass, trying to be chatty

with me about it afterwards, “it wasn’t at all like olden times. I wonder

where the difference lies. The lack of good humor? The lack of

companionship? You know I think he must have been drinking by himself

today. Where did he get the money?”)

（“可是，你知道，那不是，”萨姆格拉斯先生说，事后试图和我聊

聊，“它一点也不像过去。我想知道区别在哪里。缺乏幽默感？缺乏陪

伴？你知道，我想他今天一定是自己喝酒了。他从哪里弄来的钱？

“Sebastian’s gone up,” said Brideshead when we reached the drawing-

room.

“塞巴斯蒂安上去了，”当我们到达客厅时，布里德斯黑德说。

“Yes? Shall I read?”

“是吗？我该读书吗？

Julia and Rex played bezique; the tortoise, teased by the pekinese,

withdrew into his shell; Lady Marchmain read The Diary of a Nobody aloud

until, quite early, she said it was time for bed.

茱莉亚和雷克斯扮演贝齐克;被北京人戏弄，缩进了壳里;马奇曼夫

人大声朗读《一个无名小卒的日记》，直到很早，她说该睡觉了。

“Can’t I stay up and play a little longer, mummy? Just three games?”

“妈妈，我就不能熬夜玩一会儿吗？就三场比赛？

“Very well, darling. Come in and see me before you go to bed. I shan’t

be asleep.”

“很好，亲爱的。睡前进来见我。我睡不着。

It was plain to Mr. Samgrass and me that Julia and Rex wanted to be left

alone, so we went, too; it was not plain to Brideshead, who settled down to

read The Times, which he had not yet seen that day. Then, going to our side

of the house, Mr. Samgrass said: “It wasn’t at all like olden times.”

萨姆格拉斯先生和我很清楚，茱莉亚和雷克斯想一个人呆着，所以

我们也去了;这对布里德斯黑德来说并不明显，他安顿下来阅读《泰晤

士报》，那天他还没有看过。然后，萨姆格拉斯先生走到我们这边，

说：“这完全不像过去。

Next morning I said to Sebastian: “Tell me honestly, do you want me to

stay on here?”

第二天早上，我对塞巴斯蒂安说：“老实告诉我，你想让我留在这

里吗？”

“No, Charles, I don’t believe I do.”

“不，查尔斯，我不相信我这样做。”

“I’m no help?”

“我没办法？”

“No help.”

“没办法。”

So I went to make my excuses to his mother.

于是我去找他妈妈找借口。

“There’s something I must ask you, Charles. Did you give Sebastian

money yesterday?”

“有件事我必须问你，查尔斯。你昨天给塞巴斯蒂安钱了吗？

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Knowing how he was likely to spend it?”

“知道他可能怎么花掉吗？”

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“I don’t understand it,” she said. “I simply don’t understand how anyone

can be so callously wicked.”

“我不明白，”她说。“我简直不明白怎么会有人如此冷酷无情。”

She paused, but I do not think she expected any answer; there was

nothing I could say unless I were to start all over again on that familiar,

endless argument.

她停顿了一下，但我不认为她期待任何答案;我无话可说，除非我

重新开始那个熟悉的、无休止的争论。

“I’m not going to reproach you,” she said. “God knows it’s not for me to

reproach anyone. Any failure in my children is my failure. But I don’t

understand it. I don’t understand how you can have been so nice in so many

ways, and then do something so wantonly cruel. I don’t understand how we

all liked you so much. Did you hate us all the time? I don’t understand how

we deserved it.”

“我不会责备你，”她说。“上帝知道我不能责备任何人。我孩子的

任何失败都是我的失败。但我不明白。我不明白你怎么会在这么多方

面表现得如此善良，然后做出如此肆无忌惮的残忍之事。我不明白我

们为什么都这么喜欢你。你一直恨我们吗？我不明白我们怎么配得上

它。

I was unmoved; there was no part of me remotely touched by her

distress. It was as I had often imagined being expelled from school. I almost

expected to hear her say: “I have already written to inform your unhappy

father.” But as I drove away and turned back in the car to take what

promised to be my last view of the house, I felt that I was leaving part of

myself behind, and that wherever I went afterwards I should feel the lack of

it, and search for it hopelessly, as ghosts are said to do, frequenting the

spots where they buried material treasures without which they cannot pay

their way to the nether world.

我不为所动;我身上没有一丝一毫被她的痛苦所触动。就像我经常

想象的那样，被学校开除。我几乎以为会听到她说：“我已经写信通知

你不幸的父亲了。但是，当我开车离开，转身回到车里，去看我最后

看的房子时，我觉得我把自己的一部分抛在了脑后，无论我以后走到

哪里，我都应该感到缺乏它，并绝望地寻找它，就像据说鬼魂所做的

那样，经常光顾他们埋葬物质宝藏的地方，没有这些宝藏，他们就无

法支付前往下界的路。

“I shall never go back,” I said to myself.

“我再也回不去了，”我对自己说。

A door had shut, the low door in the wall I had sought and found in

Oxford; open it now and I should find no enchanted garden.

一扇门关上了，那是我在牛津寻找并找到的墙上的那扇门;现在打

开它，我应该找不到魔法花园。

I had come to the surface, into the light of common day and the fresh

sea-air, after long captivity in the sunless coral palaces and waving forests

of the ocean bed.

我来到了水面，在平常的阳光和新鲜的海风中，在无光的珊瑚宫殿

和海床的波浪森林中长期被囚禁之后。

I had left behind me—what? Youth? Adolescence? Romance? The

conjuring stuff of these things, “the Young Magician’s Compendium,” that

neat cabinet where the ebony wand had its place beside the delusive billiard

balls, the penny that folded double, and the feather flowers that could be

drawn into a hollow candle.

我留下了——什么？青年？青春期？浪漫？这些东西的魔术师，

“年轻魔术师的纲要”，那个整洁的柜子，乌木魔杖放在错觉的台球旁

边，硬币可以折叠成双倍，羽毛花可以画成空心蜡烛。

“I have left behind illusion,” I said to myself. “Henceforth I live in a

world of three dimensions—with the aid of my five senses.”

“我已经抛弃了幻想，”我对自己说。“从今以后，我生活在一个三

维的世界里——借助我的五种感官。”

I have since learned that there is no such world, but then, as the car

turned out of sight of the house, I thought it took no finding, but lay all

about me at the end of the avenue.

从那以后，我才知道没有这样的世界，但后来，当汽车转出房子的

视线时，我以为它不需要找到，而是躺在大道的尽头。

Thus I returned to Paris, and to the friends I had found there and the habits I

had formed. I thought I should hear no more of Brideshead, but life has few

separations as sharp as that. It was not three weeks before I received a letter

in Cordelia’s Frenchified convent hand:

就这样，我回到了巴黎，回到了我在那里找到的朋友和我养成的习

惯。我以为我不应该再听到新娘头了，但生活中很少有像这样尖锐的

分离。不到三个星期，我就收到了一封由科迪莉亚（Cordelia）写的法

语修道院的信：

“Darling Charles,” she said. “I was so very miserable when you went.

You might have come and said good-bye!

“

亲爱的查尔斯，

”

她说。

“

你去的时候，我非常痛苦。你可能已经

来了，说再见了！

“I heard all about your disgrace, and I am writing to say that I am in

disgrace, too. I sneaked Wilcox’s keys and got whisky for Sebastian and got

caught. He did seem to want it so. And there was (and is) an awful row.

“

我听说了你的耻辱，我写信说我也蒙羞。我偷偷拿走了威尔科克

斯的钥匙，给塞巴斯蒂安买了威士忌，结果被抓住了。他似乎确实想

要这样。而且曾经（现在）发生了可怕的争吵。

“Mr. Samgrass has gone (good!), and I think he is a bit in disgrace, too,

but I don’t know why.

“

萨姆格拉斯先生走了（很好！），我觉得他也有点丢脸，但我不

知道为什么。

“Mr. Mottram is very popular with Julia (bad!) and is taking Sebastian

away (bad! bad!) to a German doctor.

“

莫特拉姆先生很受朱莉娅的欢迎（坏！并把塞巴斯蒂安带走（糟

糕！糟糕！）去看德国医生。

“Julia’s tortoise disappeared. We think it buried itself, as they do, so

there goes a packet (expression of Mr. Mottram’s).

“

茱莉亚的消失了。我们认为它像他们一样埋葬了自己，所以有一

个包裹（莫特拉姆先生的表达）。

“I am very well.

“

我很好。

“With love from

“

带着来自的爱

Cordelia.”

科黛莉亚。

It must have been about a week after receiving this letter that I returned

to my rooms one afternoon to find Rex waiting for me.

大概在收到这封信大约一个星期后，有一天下午我回到房间，发现

雷克斯在等我。

It was about four, for the light began to fail early in the studio at that

time of year. I could see by the expression on the concierge’s face, when she

told me I had a visitor waiting, that there was something impressive

upstairs; she had a vivid gift of expressing differences of age or attraction;

this was the expression which meant someone of the first consequence, and

Rex indeed seemed to justify it, as I found him in his big travelling coat,

filling the window that looked over the river.

大约是四点，因为在每年的那个时候，工作室的灯就开始失灵了。

我从门房脸上的表情可以看出，当她告诉我有一位访客在等我时，楼

上有一些令人印象深刻的东西;她有一种生动的天赋，可以表达年龄或

吸引力的差异;这句话的意思是第一个后果的人，而雷克斯似乎确实证

明了这一点，因为我发现他穿着他的大旅行外套，填满了俯瞰河流的

窗户。

“Well,” I said. “Well.”

“嗯，”我说。“嗯。”

“I came this morning. They told me where you usually lunched but I

couldn’t see you there. Have you got him?”

“我今天早上来了。他们告诉我你通常在哪里吃午饭，但我在那里

看不到你。你抓到他了吗？

I did not need to ask whom. “So he’s given you the slip, too?”

我不需要问谁。“所以他也把纸条给了你？”

“We got here last night and were going on to Zürich today. I left him at

the Lotti after dinner, as he said he was tired, and went round to the

Travellers’ for a game.”

“我们昨晚来到这里，今天要去苏黎世。晚饭后，我把他留在了洛

蒂，因为他说他累了，然后去旅行者家玩了一场。

I noticed how, even with me, he was making excuses, as though

rehearsing his story for retelling elsewhere. “As he said he was tired” was

good. I could not well imagine Rex letting a half-tipsy boy interfere with

his cards.

我注意到，即使和我在一起，他也在找借口，好像在排练他的故

事，以便在别处复述。“正如他所说，他累了”很好。我无法想象雷克

斯会让一个半醉的男孩干扰他的牌。

“So you came back and found him gone?”

“所以你回来发现他不见了？”

“Not at all. I wish I had. I found him sitting up for me. I had a run of

luck at the Travellers’ and cleaned up a packet. Sebastian pinched the lot

while I was asleep. All he left me was two first-class tickets to Zürich stuck

in the edge of the looking-glass. I had nearly three hundred quid, blast

him!”

“一点也不。我希望我有。我发现他为我坐了起来。我在旅行者那

里运气不错，清理了一个包裹。塞巴斯蒂安趁我睡着的时候捏了捏。

他留给我的只有两张去苏黎世的头等舱机票，卡在镜子的边缘。我有

将近三百英镑，炸死他！

“And now he may be almost anywhere.”

“现在他可能几乎在任何地方。

“Anywhere. You’re not hiding him by any chance?”

“任何地方。你不会把他藏起来吧？

“No. My dealings with that family are over.”

“不。我和那个家庭的交往已经结束了。

“I think mine are just beginning,” said Rex. “I say, I’ve got a lot to talk

about, and I promised a chap at the Travellers’ I’d give him his revenge this

afternoon. Won’t you dine with me?”

“我认为我的才刚刚开始，”雷克斯说。“我说，我有很多话要说，

我答应过旅行者的小伙子，我今天下午会给他报仇。你不和我一起吃

饭吗？

“Yes. Where?”

“是的。在哪里？

“I usually go to Ciro’s.”

“我通常去Ciro's。”

“Why not Paillard’s?”

“为什么不是Paillard的？”

“Never heard of it. I’m paying you know.”

“从来没听说过。我付钱，你知道的。

“I know you are. Let me order dinner.”

“我知道你是。让我点晚餐。

“Well, all right. What’s the place again?” I wrote it down for him. “Is it

the sort of place you see native life?”

“嗯，好吧。又是什么地方？我为他写下了它。“这是你看到的那种

本土生活的地方吗？”

“Yes, you might call it that.”

“是的，你可以这么称呼它。”

“Well, it’ll be an experience. Order something good.”

“嗯，这将是一次经历。点点好东西。

“That’s my intention.”

“这就是我的本意。”

I was there twenty minutes before Rex. If I had to spend an evening with

him, it should, at any rate, be in my own way. I remember the dinner well—

soup of oseille, a sole quite simply cooked in a white-wine sauce, a caneton

à la presse, a lemon soufflé. At the last minute, fearing that the whole thing

was too simple for Rex, I added caviar aux blinis. And for wine I let him

give me a bottle of 1906 Montrachet, then at its prime, and, with the duck, a

Clos de Bèze of 1904.

我比雷克斯早二十分钟到达那里。如果我必须和他一起度过一个晚

上，无论如何，它应该以我自己的方式。我记得很清楚那顿晚餐——

oseille汤，用白葡萄酒酱简单烹制的鳎鱼，caneton à la presse，柠檬蛋

奶酥。在最后一刻，由于担心整个事情对雷克斯来说太简单了，我添

加了鱼子酱。至于葡萄酒，我让他给了我一瓶1906年的Montrachet，

当时正处于鼎盛时期，还有一瓶1904年的Clos de Bèze。

Living was easy in France then; with the exchange as it was, my

allowance went a long way and I did not live frugally. It was very seldom,

however, that I had a dinner like this, and I felt well disposed to Rex, when

at last he arrived and gave up his hat and coat with the air of not expecting

to see them again. He looked round the somber little place with suspicion as

though hoping to see apaches or a drinking party of students. All he saw

was four senators with napkins tucked under their beards eating in absolute

silence. I could imagine him telling his commercial friends later: “…

interesting fellow I know; an art student living in Paris. Took me to a funny

little restaurant—sort of place you’d pass without looking at—where there

was some of the best food I ever ate. There were half a dozen senators

there, too, which shows you it was the right place. Wasn’t at all cheap

either.”

那时在法国生活很容易;就这样交换，我的零花钱走了很长的路，

我过得并不节俭。然而，我很少吃过这样的晚餐，我对雷克斯感觉很

好，当他终于来了，放弃了他的帽子和外套，带着一种不期待再见到

他们的气息。他怀疑地环顾着这个阴沉的小地方，仿佛希望看到阿帕

奇人或学生的酒会。他只看到四位参议员，餐巾纸塞在胡须下，在绝

对的沉默中吃饭。我可以想象他后来告诉他的商业朋友：“......我认识

的有趣的家伙;一位住在巴黎的艺术学生。带我去了一家有趣的小餐馆

——那种你不看就路过的地方——那里有一些我吃过的最好的食物。

那里也有六名参议员，这表明这是正确的地方。一点也不便宜。

“Any sign of Sebastian?” he asked.

“塞巴斯蒂安有什么迹象吗？”他问。

“There won’t be,” I said, “until he needs money.”

“不会有的，”我说，“除非他需要钱。

“It’s a bit thick, going off like that. I was rather hoping that if I made a

good job of him, it might do me a bit of good in another direction.”

“它有点厚，像那样。我倒是希望，如果我把他做好了，那可能会

在另一个方向上对我有所帮助。

He plainly wished to talk of his own affairs; they could wait, I thought,

for the hour of tolerance and repletion, for the cognac; they could wait until

the attention was blunted and one could listen with half the mind only; now

in the keen moment when the maître d’hôtel was turning the blinis over in

the pan, and, in the background, two humbler men were preparing the press,

we would talk of myself.

他显然想谈谈他自己的事情;我想，他们可以等待宽容和补充的时

刻，等待干邑白兰地;他们可以等到注意力减弱，一个人只能用一半的

头脑去听;现在，当酒店女主人在锅里翻转布利尼时，在背景中，两个

更谦逊的人正在准备印刷机时，我们会谈论我自己。

“Did you stay long at Brideshead? Was my name mentioned after I

left?”

“你在布里德斯黑德呆了很久吗？我离开后有没有提到我的名字？

“Was it mentioned? I got sick of the sound of it, old boy. The

Marchioness got what she called a “bad conscience” about you. She piled it

on pretty thick, I gather, at your last meeting.”

“有没有提到？我厌倦了它的声音，老男孩。Marchioness对你有她

所谓的“坏良心”。她把它堆得很厚，我记得，在你上次见面的时候。

“ ‘Callously wicked,’ ‘wantonly cruel.’ ”

“'冷酷无情的邪恶'，'肆无忌惮的残忍'。"

“Hard words.”

“难听的话。”

“ ‘It doesn’t matter what people call you unless they call you pigeon pie

and eat you up.’ ”

“'人们怎么称呼你并不重要，除非他们叫你鸽子派，然后把你吃

掉。"

“Eh?”

“嗯？”

“A saying.”

“一句话。”

“Ah.” The cream and hot butter mingled and overflowed, separating

each glaucous bead of caviar from its fellows, capping it in white and gold.

“啊。”奶油和热黄油混合在一起，溢出来，将每一颗鱼子酱的光辉

珠子与它的同伴分开，用白色和金色覆盖它。

“I like a bit of chopped onion with mine,” said Rex. “Chap-who-knew

told me it brought out the flavor.”

“我喜欢用我的洋葱切碎，”雷克斯说。“知道的小伙子告诉我，它

带出了味道。”

“Try it without first,” I said. “And tell me more news of myself.”

“不用先试试，”我说。“告诉我更多关于我自己的消息。”

“Well, of course, Greenacre, or whatever he was called—the snooty don

—he came a cropper. That was well received by all. He was the blue-eyed

boy for a day or two after you left. Shouldn’t wonder if he hadn’t put the

old girl up to pitching you out. He was always being pushed down our

throats, so in the end Julia couldn’t bear it anymore and gave him away.”

“嗯，当然，格林纳克，或者不管他叫什么名字——那个势利的唐

——他来了一个庄稼人。这得到了大家的好评。在你离开后的一两天

里，他还是那个蓝眼睛的男孩。不应该怀疑他是否没有让那个老女孩

把你推销出去。他总是被推到我们的喉咙里，所以最后朱莉娅再也忍

受不了了，把他送走了。

“Julia did?”

“茱莉亚？”

“Well, he’d begun to stick his nose into our affairs, you see. Julia

spotted he was a fake, and one afternoon when Sebastian was tight—he was

tight most of the time—she got the whole story of the Grand Tour out of

him. And that was the end of Mr. Samgrass. After that the Marchioness

began to think she might have been a bit rough with you.”

“嗯，他开始插手我们的事了，你看。茱莉亚发现他是假的，一天

下午，当塞巴斯蒂安很紧张时——他大部分时间都很紧张——她从他

那里得到了大巡回赛的整个故事。这就是萨姆格拉斯先生的结局。在

那之后，马尔乔内斯开始认为她可能对你有点粗暴。

“And what about the row with Cordelia?”

“那和科迪莉亚的那一排呢？”

“That eclipsed everything. That kid’s a walking marvel—she’d been

feeding Sebastian whisky right under our noses for a week. We couldn’t

think where he was getting it. That’s when the Marchioness finally

crumbled.”

“这让一切都黯然失色。那个孩子真是个行走的奇迹——她已经在

我们眼皮底下喂塞巴斯蒂安威士忌一个星期了。我们想不出他从哪里

得到的。就在那时，马尔乔内斯终于崩溃了。

The soup was delicious after the rich blinis—hot, thin, bitter, frothy.

浓郁的薄饼之后，汤很美味——热的、稀的、苦的、泡沫的。

“I’ll tell you a thing, Charles, that Ma Marchmain hasn’t let on to

anyone. She’s a very sick woman. Might peg out any minute. George

Anstruther saw her in the autumn and put it at two years.”

“我告诉你一件事，查尔斯，马 Marchmain没有让任何人知道。她

是一个病得很重的女人。可能随时都会消失。乔治·安斯特拉瑟

（George Anstruther）在秋天见到她，并把它定在了两年。

“How on earth do you know?”

“你到底是怎么知道的？”

“It’s the kind of thing I hear. With the way her family are going on at the

moment, I wouldn’t give her a year. I know just the man for her in Vienna.

He put Sonia Bamfshire on her feet when everyone including Anstruther

had despaired of her. But Ma Marchmain won’t do anything about it. I

suppose it’s something to do with her crack-brain religion, not to take care

of the body.”

“这是我听到的那种事情。以她家目前的情况，我不会给她一年的

时间。我只知道她在维也纳的那个男人。当包括安斯特拉瑟在内的所

有人都对她感到绝望时，他让索尼娅·班夫希尔站了起来。但马

Marchmain对此无能为力。我想这与她脑残的宗教有关，而不是照顾

身体。

The sole was so simple and unobtrusive that Rex failed to notice it. We

ate to the music of the press—the crunch of the bones, the drip of blood and

marrow, the tap of the spoon basting the thin slices of breast. There was a

pause here of a quarter of an hour, while I drank the first glass of the Clos

de Bèze and Rex smoked his first cigarette. He leaned back, blew a cloud of

smoke across the table, and remarked, “You know, the food here isn’t half

bad; someone ought to take this place up and make something of it.”

鞋底是如此简单和不显眼，以至于雷克斯没有注意到它。我们听着

压榨机的音乐——骨头的嘎吱声，血液和骨髓的滴落声，勺子敲击薄

薄的胸肉片的声音。这里停顿了一刻钟，我喝了第一杯 Clos de Bèze，

Rex 抽了他的第一根烟。他向后靠了靠，在桌子上吹了一团烟，说：

“你知道，这里的食物还不错;应该有人把这个地方拿来做点什么。

Presently he began again on the Marchmains:

现在，他又开始了Marchmains：

“I’ll tell you another thing, too—they’ll get a jolt financially soon if they

don’t look out.”

“我还要告诉你另一件事——如果他们不注意，他们很快就会在经

济上受到冲击。”

“I thought they were enormously rich.”

“我以为他们非常富有。”

“Well, they are rich in the way people are who just let their money sit

quiet. Everyone of that sort is poorer than they were in 1914, and the Flytes

don’t seem to realize it. I reckon those lawyers who manage their affairs

find it convenient to give them all the cash they want and no questions

asked. Look at the way they live—Brideshead and Marchmain House both

going full blast, pack of foxhounds, no rents raised, nobody sacked, dozens

of old servants doing damn all, being waited on by other servants, and then

besides all that there’s the old boy setting up a separate establishment—and

setting it up on no humble scale either. D’you know how much they’re

overdrawn?”

“嗯，他们很有钱，就像那些让他们的钱安静下来的人一样。这种

人比1914年更穷，而弗莱特夫妇似乎没有意识到这一点。我认为那些

管理他们事务的律师发现，给他们所有他们想要的现金，而且不问任

何问题，这很方便。瞧瞧他们的生活方式——布里德斯黑德和马奇曼

府都开足马力，成群结队的猎狐犬，没有提高租金，没有人被解雇，

几十个老仆人都在做该死的事情，被其他仆人侍候着，除此之外，还

有那个老男孩建立了一个单独的机构——而且规模也不小。你知道他

们透支了多少吗？

“Of course I don’t.”

“我当然不知道。”

“Jolly near a hundred thousand in London. I don’t know what they owe

elsewhere. Well, that’s quite a packet, you know, for people who aren’t

using their money. Ninety-eight thousand last November. It’s the kind of

thing I hear.”

“在伦敦快活了将近十万。我不知道他们在别处欠了什么。嗯，你

知道，对于那些不用钱的人来说，这是一个相当大的包。去年11月有

9.8万。这是我听到的那种事情。

Those were the kind of things he heard, mortal illness and debt, I

thought.

我想，这些都是他听到的那种东西，致命的疾病和债务。

I rejoiced in the Burgundy. It seemed a reminder that the world was an

older and better place than Rex knew, that mankind in its long passion had

learned another wisdom than his. By chance I met this same wine again,

lunching with my wine merchant in St. James’s Street, in the first autumn of

the war; it had softened and faded in the intervening years, but it still spoke

in the pure, authentic accent of its prime, the same words of hope.

我为勃艮第感到高兴。这似乎在提醒我们，这个世界比雷克斯所知

道的更古老、更美好，人类在漫长的激情中学到了另一种智慧。在战

争的第一个秋天，我在圣詹姆斯街与我的酒商共进午餐时，偶然又遇

到了同样的葡萄酒。在随后的岁月里，它已经软化和褪色，但它仍然

用它鼎盛时期的纯正、真实的口音说话，同样的希望之词。

“I don’t mean that they’ll be paupers; the old boy will always be good

for an odd thirty thousand a year, but there’ll be a shake-up coming soon,

and when the upper-classes get the wind up, their first idea is usually to cut

down on the girls. I’d like to get the little matter of a marriage settlement

through, before it comes.”

“我不是说他们会成为穷人;老男孩一年三万多钱总是好，但很快就

会有改组，当上流社会起风时，他们的第一个想法通常是减少女孩

子。我想在婚姻协议到来之前解决它。

We had by no means reached the cognac, but here we were on the

subject of himself. In twenty minutes I should have been ready for all he

had to tell. I closed my mind to him as best I could and gave myself to the

food before me, but sentences came breaking in on my happiness, recalling

me to the harsh, acquisitive world which Rex inhabited. He wanted a

woman; he wanted the best on the market, and he wanted her at his own

price; that was what it amounted to.

我们还没有达到干邑白兰地，但在这里我们谈到了他的话题。再过

二十分钟，我就应该准备好接受他要说的一切了。我尽我所能地对他

闭上心扉，把自己交给眼前的食物，但句子打断了我的幸福，把我召

回了雷克斯所居住的严酷、贪婪的世界。他想要一个女人;他想要市场

上最好的，他想要她以自己的价格;这就是它的意义所在。

“… Ma Marchmain doesn’t like me. Well, I’m not asking her to. It’s not

her I want to marry. She hasn’t the guts to say openly: ‘You’re not a

gentleman. You’re an adventurer from the Colonies.’ She says we live in

different atmospheres. That’s all right, but Julia happens to fancy my

atmosphere…. Then she brings up religion. I’ve nothing against her

Church; we don’t take much account of Catholics in Canada, but that’s

different; in Europe you’ve got some very posh Catholics. All right, Julia

can go to church whenever she wants to. I shan’t try and stop her. It doesn’t

mean two pins to her, as a matter of fact, but I like a girl to have religion.

What’s more, she can bring the children up Catholic. I’ll make all the

‘promises’ they want…. Then there’s my past. ‘We know so little about

you.’ She knows a sight too much. You may know I’ve been tied up with

someone else for a year or two.”

"...马 Marchmain不喜欢我。好吧，我不是要她这样做。我想娶的不

是她。她没有胆量公开说：“你不是绅士。你是来自殖民地的冒险家。

她说，我们生活在不同的氛围中。没关系，但茱莉亚碰巧喜欢我的气

氛......然后她提出了宗教。我不反对她的教会;我们不太考虑加拿大的

天主教徒，但那是不同的;在欧洲，你有一些非常豪华的天主教徒。好

吧，茱莉亚可以随时去教堂。我不会试图阻止她。事实上，这对她来

说并不意味着两枚别针，但我喜欢一个有宗教信仰的女孩。更重要的

是，她可以把孩子们培养成天主教徒。我会做出他们想要的所有“承

诺”......然后是我的过去。“我们对你知之甚少。”她知道的景象太多

了。你可能知道我已经和别人绑了一两年了。

I knew; everyone who had ever met Rex knew of his affair with Brenda

Champion; knew also that it was from this affair that he derived everything

which distinguished him from every other stock-jobber; his golf with the

Prince of Wales, his membership of Bratt’s, even his smoking-room

comradeship at the House of Commons, for, when he first appeared there,

his party chiefs did not say of him, “Look, there is the promising young

member for north Gridley who spoke so well on Rent Restrictions.” They

said: “There’s Brenda Champion’s latest”; it had done him a great deal of

good with men; women he could usually charm.

我知道;每个见过雷克斯的人都知道他与布伦达冠军的婚外情;他也

知道，正是从这件事中，他得到了使他有别于其他所有股票工人的一

切;他与威尔士亲王一起打高尔夫球，他是布拉特的会员，甚至他在下

议院吸烟室的同志关系，因为当他第一次出现在那里时，他的党魁们

并没有说他，“看，北格里德利有一位很有前途的年轻成员，他在租金

限制方面说得很好。他们说：“这是 Brenda Champion 的最新作品”;这

对他与人有很大的好处;他通常可以吸引的女人。

“Well, that’s all washed up. Ma Marchmain was too delicate to mention

the subject; all she said was that I had “notoriety”. Well, what does she

expect as a son-in-law—a sort of half-baked monk like Brideshead? Julia

knows all about the other thing; if she doesn’t care, I don’t see it’s anyone

else’s business.”

“嗯，这些都被冲走了。马 Marchmain 太微妙了，无法提及这个话

题;她只说我有“恶名”。那么，作为一个女婿，她期待什么——像布里

德斯黑德这样半生不熟的僧侣？茱莉亚对另一件事了如指掌;如果她不

在乎，我看不出这是别人的事。

After the duck came a salad of watercress and chicory in a faint mist of

chives. I tried to think only of the salad. I succeeded for a time in thinking

only of the soufflé. Then came the cognac and the proper hour for these

confidences. “… Julia’s just rising twenty. I don’t want to wait till she’s of

age. Anyway, I don’t want to marry without doing the thing properly…

nothing hole-in-corner…. I have to see she isn’t jockeyed out of her proper

settlement. So as the Marchioness won’t play ball I’m off to see the old man

and square him. I gather he’s likely to agree to anything he knows will upset

her. He’s at Monte Carlo at the moment. I’d planned to go there after

dropping Sebastian off at Zürich. That’s why it’s such a bloody bore having

lost him.”

鸭子之后是西洋菜和菊苣沙拉，夹杂着淡淡的韭菜雾气。我试着只

想着沙拉。有一段时间，我只想到蛋奶酥。然后是干邑白兰地和这些

信心的适当时间。"...茱莉亚刚升二十岁。我不想等到她长大。反正我

不想不把事情做好就结婚......没有什么角落里的洞......我必须看到她没

有被赶出她应有的定居点。所以，既然马尔乔内斯不会打球，我就去

看看老人，把他摆正正。我估计他很可能会同意任何他知道会让她不

高兴的事情。他目前在蒙特卡洛。我本来打算在把塞巴斯蒂安送到苏

黎世后去那里。这就是为什么失去他是如此血腥的无聊。

The cognac was not to Rex’s taste. It was clear and pale and it came to

us in a bottle free from grime and Napoleonic ciphers. It was only a year or

two older than Rex and lately bottled. They gave it to us in very thin tulip-

shaped glasses of modest size.

干邑白兰地不符合雷克斯的口味。它清晰而苍白，装在一个没有污

垢和拿破仑密码的瓶子里。它只比雷克斯大一两岁，最近装瓶了。他

们把它放在非常薄的郁金香形状的玻璃杯里，大小适中。

“Brandy’s one of the things I do know a bit about,” said Rex. “This is a

bad color. What’s more, I can’t taste it in this thimble.”

“白兰地是我确实知道的事情之一，”雷克斯说。“这是一种不好的

颜色。更何况，我在这个顶针里尝不到。

They brought him a balloon the size of his head. He made them warm it

over the spirit lamp. Then he rolled the splendid spirit round, buried his face

in the fumes, and pronounced it the sort of stuff he put soda in at home.

他们给他带来了一个头大小的气球。他让他们在灵灯上取暖。然后

他把那灿烂的烈酒卷了一圈，把脸埋在烟雾里，说这是他在家里放苏

打水的那种东西。

So, shamefacedly, they wheeled out of its hiding place the vast and

moldy bottle they kept for people of Rex’s sort.

于是，他们惭愧地把那个又大又发霉的瓶子从藏身之处推了出来，

瓶子是留给雷克斯这种人的。

“That’s the stuff,” he said, tilting the treacly concoction till it left dark

rings round the sides of his glass. “They’ve always got some tucked away,

but they won’t bring it out unless you make a fuss. Have some.”

“就是这些东西，”他说，倾斜着那可怕的混合物，直到它在他的玻

璃杯两侧留下黑色的圆环。“他们总是把一些东西藏起来，但除非你大

惊小怪，否则他们不会把它拿出来。来点吧。

“I’m quite happy with this.”

“我对此很满意。”

“Well, it’s a crime to drink it, if you don’t really appreciate it.”

“好吧，如果你不是真的欣赏它，喝它是一种犯罪。”

He lit his cigar and sat back at peace with the world; I, too, was at peace

in another world than his. We both were happy. He talked of Julia and I

heard his voice, unintelligible at a great distance, like a dog’s barking miles

away on a still night.

他点燃雪茄，与世界和平相处;我也在另一个世界里平静地生活

着，而不是他的世界。我们俩都很开心。他谈到了茱莉亚，我听到了

他的声音，在很远的地方听不懂，就像狗在寂静的夜晚吠叫一样。

At the beginning of May the engagement was announced. I saw the notice

in the Continental Daily Mail and assumed that Rex had “squared the old

man.” But things did not go as were expected. The next news I had of them

was in the middle of June, when I read that they had been married very

quietly at the Savoy Chapel. No royalty was present; nor was the Prime

Minister; nor were any of Julia’s family. It sounded like a ‘hole-in-the-

corner’ affair, but it was not for several years that I heard the full story.

5月初，宣布订婚。我在《大陆每日邮报》上看到了这则通知，并认为

雷克斯已经“摆平了老人”。但事情并没有像预期的那样发展。我得到

的下一个消息是在六月中旬，当时我读到他们在萨沃伊教堂非常安静

地结婚了。没有皇室成员在场;首相也不是;茱莉亚的家人也没有。这

听起来像是一件“角落里的洞”事件，但直到几年后我才听到完整的故

事。

Two

It is time to speak of Julia, who till now has played an intermittent and

somewhat enigmatic part in Sebastian’s drama. It was thus she appeared to

me at the time, and I to her. We pursued separate aims which brought us

near to one another, but we remained strangers. She told me later that she

had made a kind of note of me in her mind, as, scanning the shelf for a

particular book, one will sometimes have one’s attention caught by another,

take it down, glance at the title page and, saying ‘I must read that, too, when

I’ve the time,” replace it, and continue the search. On my side the interest

was keener, for there was always the physical likeness between brother and

sister, which, caught repeatedly in different poses, under different lights,

each time pierced me anew; and, as Sebastian in his sharp decline seemed

daily to fade and crumble, so much the more did Julia stand out clear and

firm.

是时候谈谈朱莉娅了，到目前为止，她在塞巴斯蒂安的戏剧中扮演了

一个断断续续且有些神秘的角色。就这样，她当时出现在我面前，我

也出现在她面前。我们追求不同的目标，使我们彼此接近，但我们仍

然是陌生人。她后来告诉我，她在脑海中记下了我，因为在书架上寻

找一本书时，一个人有时会被另一个人吸引注意力，把它拿下来，瞥

一眼扉页，然后说“我有时间的时候也必须读一读”，然后替换它，然

后继续搜索。在我这边，兴趣更浓厚，因为兄弟姐妹之间总是有身体

上的相似之处，在不同的灯光下，以不同的姿势反复捕捉到，每次都

重新刺穿我;而且，当塞巴斯蒂安急剧衰落时，他似乎每天都在褪色和

崩溃，朱莉娅更加清晰而坚定。

She was thin in those days, flat-chested, leggy; she seemed all limbs and

neck, bodiless, spidery; thus far she conformed to the fashion, but the hair-

cut and the hats of the period, and the blank stare and gape of the period,

and the clownish dabs of rouge high on the cheekbones, could not reduce

her to type.

那时候的她很瘦，平胸，腿长;她看起来四肢和脖子都长满了，没

有身体，像蜘蛛一样;到目前为止，她符合时尚，但那个时期的发型和

帽子，那个时期的茫然凝视和目瞪口呆，以及颧骨上高高的胭脂小丑

般的涂抹，都无法使她沦为打字。

When I first met her, when she met me in the station yard and drove me

home through the twilight, that high summer of 1923, she was just eighteen

and fresh from her first London season.

当我第一次见到她时，当她在车站院子里遇见我，并在暮色中开车

送我回家时，那是1923年的那个盛夏，她只有十八岁，刚从伦敦的第

一个赛季开始。

Some said it was the most brilliant season since the war, that things were

getting into their stride again. Julia was at the center of it. There were then

remaining perhaps half a dozen London houses which could be called

“historic”; Marchmain House in St. James’s was one of them, and the ball

given for Julia, in spite of the ignoble costume of the time, was by all

accounts a splendid spectacle. Sebastian went down for it and half-heartedly

suggested my coming with him; I refused and came to regret my refusal, for

it was the last ball of its kind given there; the last of a splendid series.

有人说这是战后最辉煌的赛季，事情又开始大步向前了。茱莉亚是

其中的中心。当时可能还剩下六座伦敦房屋，可以称为“历史性”;圣詹

姆斯的马奇曼宫就是其中之一，尽管当时的服装不雅，但为朱莉娅举

办的舞会却是一场壮观的场面。塞巴斯蒂安为此而下，半心半意地建

议我和他一起去;我拒绝了，开始后悔我的拒绝，因为这是那里最后一

次这样的舞会;精彩系列的最后一部。

How could I have known? There seemed time for everything in those

days; the world was open to be explored at leisure. I was so full of Oxford

that summer; London could wait, I thought.

我怎么会知道？在那些日子里，似乎一切都有时间;世界是开放

的，可以在闲暇时探索。那年夏天，我充满了牛津;伦敦可以等一等，

我想。

The other great houses belonged to kinsmen or to childhood friends of

Julia’s, and besides them there were countless substantial houses in the

squares of Mayfair and Belgravia, alight and thronged, one or other of

them, night after night. Foreigners returning on post from their own waste

lands wrote home that here they seemed to catch a glimpse of the world

they had believed lost forever among the mud and wire, and through those

halcyon weeks Julia darted and shone, part of the sunshine between the

trees, part of the candle-light in the mirror’s spectrum, so that elderly men

and women, sitting aside with their memories, saw her as herself the blue-

bird. “ ‘Bridey’ Marchmain’s eldest girl,” they said. “Pity he can’t see her

tonight.”

其他大房子属于茱莉亚的亲戚或儿时的朋友，除了它们之外，在梅

菲尔和贝尔格莱维亚的广场上还有无数的大房子，夜以继日地挤满了

人。从自己的荒原上回来的外国人给家里写信说，在这里，他们似乎

瞥见了他们认为永远消失在泥泞和铁丝网中的世界，在那些平静的星

期里，朱莉娅飞奔和闪耀，一部分是树木之间的阳光，一部分是镜子

光谱中的烛光，于是，年长的男人和女人，带着他们的记忆坐在一

旁，把她看作是她自己那只蓝鸟。“'布莱迪'马奇曼的大女儿，”他们

说。“可惜他今晚见不到她。”

That night and the night after and the night after, wherever she went,

always in her own little circle of intimates, she brought a moment of joy,

such as strikes deep to the heart on the river’s bank when the kingfisher

suddenly flares across the water.

那天晚上，后夜，后夜，无论她走到哪里，总是在她自己的亲密小

圈子里，她带来了片刻的欢乐，比如当翠鸟突然在水面上闪耀时，在

河岸上深深地击中了心脏。

This was the creature, neither child nor woman, that drove me through

the dusk that summer evening, untroubled by love, taken aback by the

power of her own beauty, hesitating on the cool edge of life; one who had

suddenly found herself armed, unawares; the heroine of a fairy story turning

over in her hands the magic ring; she had only to stroke it with her

fingertips and whisper the charmed word, for the earth to open at her feet

and belch forth her titanic servant, the fawning monster who would bring

her whatever she asked, but bring it, perhaps, in unwelcome shape.

这个生物，既不是孩子也不是女人，在那个夏日的傍晚驱使我度过

黄昏，没有被爱情所困扰，被她自己的美丽力量所震惊，在生活的凉

爽边缘犹豫不决;一个突然发现自己全副武装，毫无防备的人;童话故

事的女主人公，手里拿着魔戒;她只需要用指尖抚摸它，低声说出这个

迷人的话语，大地就会在她脚下张开，打嗝出她的泰坦尼克号仆人，

这个讨人喜欢的怪物会给她带来任何她想要的东西，但带来它，也许

是不受欢迎的形状。

She had no interest in me that evening; the jinn rumbled below us

uncalled; she lived apart in a little world, within a little world, the innermost

of a system of concentric spheres, like the ivory balls laboriously carved in

China; a little problem troubling her mind—little, as she saw it, in abstract

terms and symbols. She was wondering, dispassionately and leagues distant

from reality, whom she should marry. Thus strategists hesitate over the map,

the few pins and lines of colored chalk, contemplating a change in the pins

and lines, a matter of inches, which outside the room, out of sight of the

studious officers, may engulf past, present, and future in ruin or life. She

was a symbol to herself then, lacking the life of both child and woman;

victory and defeat were changes of pin and line; she knew nothing of war.

那天晚上她对我没有兴趣;精灵在我们脚下隆隆作响，无人召唤;她

生活在一个小小的世界里，在一个小世界里，生活在一个同心球体系

统的最深处，就像中国辛苦雕刻的象牙球;一个小问题困扰着她的脑海

——在她看来，在抽象的术语和符号中，这点小问题很小。她冷静

地、远离现实地想，她应该嫁给谁。因此，战略家们在地图上犹豫不

决，在彩色粉笔的几根大头针和几行大头针和几行字上犹豫不决，考

虑着大头针和线条的变化，几英寸的问题，在房间外面，在好学的军

官的视线之外，可能会将过去、现在和未来吞没在废墟或生活中。那

时，她是自己的象征，既缺乏孩子的生命，也缺乏女人的生命;胜利和

失败是针和线的变化;她对战争一无所知。

“If only one lived abroad,” she thought, “where these things are

arranged between parents and lawyers.”

“要是有一个人住在国外就好了，”她想，“这些事情都是在父母和

律师之间安排的。

To be married, soon and splendidly, was the aim of all her friends. If she

looked further than the wedding, it was to see marriage as the beginning of

individual existence; the skirmish where one gained one’s spurs, from

which one set out on the true quests of life.

早日结婚，是她所有朋友的目标。如果她把目光看得更远，那就是

把婚姻看作是个人存在的开始;在这场小规模的战斗中，一个人获得了

自己的动力，从中开始了人生的真正追求。

She outshone by far all the girls of her age, but she knew that, in that

little world within a world which she inhabited, there were certain grave

disabilities from which she suffered. On the sofas against the wall where the

old people counted up the points, there were things against her. There was

the scandal of her father; that slight, inherited stain upon her brightness that

seemed deepened by something in her own way of life—waywardness and

willfulness, a less disciplined habit than most of her contemporaries’; but

for that, who knows?…

她远远超过所有同龄的女孩，但她知道，在她所居住的那个小世界

里，她患有某些严重的残疾。靠墙的沙发上，老人们数着点数，有东

西反对她。有她父亲的丑闻;她光彩上那一丝轻微的、遗传的污点似乎

因她自己的生活方式中的某些东西而加深——任性和任性，一种比她

同时代大多数人更不自律的习惯;但为此，谁知道呢?...

One subject eclipsed all others in importance for the ladies along the

wall; who would the young princes marry? They could not hope for purer

lineage or a more gracious presence than Julia’s; but there was this faint

shadow on her that unfitted her for the highest honors; there was also her

religion.

对于墙上的女士们来说，一个主题的重要性超过了所有其他主题;

年轻的王子会嫁给谁？他们不能指望比茱莉亚更纯洁的血统或更亲切

的存在;但她身上有一丝微弱的阴影，使她不适合获得最高荣誉;还有

她的宗教信仰。

Nothing could have been further from Julia’s ambitions than a royal

marriage. She knew, or thought she knew, what she wanted and it was not

that. But wherever she turned, it seemed, her religion stood as a barrier

between her and her natural goal.

没有什么比皇室婚姻更能体现茱莉亚的野心了。她知道，或者认为

她知道，她想要什么，但事实并非如此。但无论她走到哪里，她的宗

教似乎都是她和她的自然目标之间的障碍。

As it seemed to her, the thing was a dead loss. If she apostatized now,

having been brought up in the Church, she would go to hell, while the

Protestant girls of her acquaintance, schooled in happy ignorance, could

marry eldest sons, live at peace with their world, and get to heaven before

her. There could be no eldest son for her, and younger sons were indelicate

things, necessary, but not to be much spoken of. Younger sons had none of

the privileges of obscurity; it was their plain duty to remain hidden until

some disaster perchance promoted them to their brothers’ places, and, since

this was their function, it was desirable that they should keep themselves

wholly suitable for succession. Perhaps in a family of three or four boys, a

Catholic might get the youngest without opposition. There were of course

the Catholics themselves, but these came seldom into the little world Julia

had made for herself; those who did were her mother’s kinsmen, who, to

her, seemed grim and eccentric. Of the dozen or so rich and noble Catholic

families, none at that time had an heir of the right age. Foreigners—there

were many among her mother’s family—were tricky about money, odd in

their ways, and a sure mark of failure in the English girl who wed them.

What was there left?

在她看来，这件事是致命的损失。如果她现在叛教，在教会中长

大，她会下地狱，而她认识的新教女孩，在幸福的无知中接受教育，

可以嫁给长子，与他们的世界和平相处，并在她之前进入天堂。她不

可能有长子，小儿子是娇滴滴的东西，必要，但不能多说。年幼的儿

子没有默默无闻的特权;他们的职责是一直隐藏起来，直到某种灾难偶

然将他们提升到他们兄弟的位置，而且，既然这是他们的职责，他们

应该让自己完全适合继承。也许在一个有三四个男孩的家庭中，天主

教徒可能会在没有反对的情况下得到最小的男孩。当然，天主教徒本

身也有，但这些人很少进入茱莉亚为自己创造的小世界;那些这样做的

人是她母亲的亲戚，在她看来，他们似乎是冷酷而古怪的。在十几个

富有和高贵的天主教家庭中，当时没有一个有合适年龄的继承人。外

国人——在她母亲的家里有很多人——对钱很狡猾，他们的方式很奇

怪，而且嫁给他们的英国姑娘无疑是失败的标志。还剩下什么？

This was Julia’s problem after her weeks of triumph in London. She

knew it was not insurmountable. There must, she thought, be a number of

people outside her own world who were well qualified to be drawn into it;

the shame was that she must seek them. Not for her the cruel, delicate

luxury of choice, the indolent, cat-and-mouse pastimes of the hearth-rug.

No Penelope she; she must hunt in the forest.

这是茱莉亚在伦敦取得数周胜利后的问题。她知道这并非不可逾

越。她想，在她自己的世界之外，一定有很多人有资格被吸引进去;可

惜的是，她必须去找他们。对她来说，不是残酷、微妙的奢侈选择，

不是壁炉地毯上懒惰的、猫捉老鼠的消遣。没有佩内洛普，她;她必须

在森林里打猎。

She had made a preposterous little picture of the kind of man who would

do: he was an English diplomat of great but not very virile beauty, now

abroad, with a house smaller than Brideshead, nearer to London; he was

old, thirty-two or -three, and had been recently and tragically widowed;

Julia thought she would prefer a man a little subdued by earlier grief. He

had a great career before him but had grown listless in his loneliness; she

was not sure he was not in danger of falling into the hands of an

unscrupulous foreign adventuress; he needed a new infusion of young life

to carry him to the Embassy at Paris. While professing a mild agnosticism

himself, he had a liking for the shows of religion and was perfectly

agreeable to having his children brought up Catholic; he believed, however,

in the prudent restriction of his family to two boys and a girl, comfortably

spaced over twelve years, and did not demand, as a Catholic husband might,

yearly pregnancies. He had twelve thousand a year above his pay, and no

near relations. Someone like that would do, Julia thought, and she was in

search of him when she met me at the railway station. I was not her man.

She told me as much, without a word, when she took the cigarette from my

lips.

她对那种人做了一幅荒谬的小图画：他是一个英国外交官，美貌很

好，但不是很有男子气概，现在在国外，有一栋比布里德斯黑德小的

房子，离伦敦更近;他年纪大了，三十二三岁，最近不幸丧偶;茱莉亚

认为她更喜欢一个被先前的悲伤所压制的男人。在他之前，他有一个

伟大的事业，但在孤独中变得无精打采;她不确定他是否有落入肆无忌

惮的外国冒险家手中的危险;他需要注入新的年轻生命，才能将他带到

巴黎大使馆。虽然他自己自称是温和的不可知论者，但他喜欢宗教表

演，并且完全同意让他的孩子抚养天主教徒。然而，他相信他的家庭

谨慎地限制在两个男孩和一个女孩，舒适地间隔十二年以上，并且不

像天主教丈夫那样要求每年怀孕。他每年的工资比他高出一万二千，

而且没有亲戚。茱莉亚想，这样的人会这样做，当她在火车站遇到我

时，她正在寻找他。我不是她的男人。当她从我嘴里拿走香烟时，她

一言不发地告诉我。

All this I learned about Julia, bit by bit, as one does learn the former—as

it seems at the time, the preparatory—life of a woman one loves, so that one

thinks of oneself as having been part of it, directing it by devious ways,

towards oneself.

我从茱莉亚身上一点一点地了解了这一切，就像一个人确实了解了

自己所爱的女人的前一种生活——在当时看来，是预备的——生活一

样，因此人们认为自己是其中的一部分，以狡猾的方式引导它走向自

己。

Julia left Sebastian and me at Brideshead and went to stay with an aunt,

Lady Rosscommon, in her villa at Cap Ferrat. All the way she pondered her

problem. She had given a name to her widower-diplomat; she called him

“Eustace,” and from that moment he became a figure of fun to her, a little

interior, incommunicable joke, so that when at last such a man did cross her

path—though he was not a diplomat but a wistful major in the Life Guards

—and fall in love with her and offer her just those gifts she had chosen, she

sent him away moodier and more wistful than ever; for by that time she had

met Rex Mottram.

茱莉亚把塞巴斯蒂安和我留在布里兹黑德，去和一位姨妈罗斯康姆

夫人住在她位于费拉角的别墅里。一路上，她都在思考自己的问题。

她给她的鳏夫外交官起了个名字;她称他为“尤斯塔斯”，从那一刻起，

他就成了她眼中一个有趣的人物，一个小小的内在的、无法交流的笑

话，所以当最后有这样一个人遇到她时——尽管他不是外交官，而是

救生员的一名渴望的少校——并爱上了她，并送给她那些她选择的礼

物，她把他送走了，比以往任何时候都更加喜怒无常，更加渴望;因为

那时她已经遇见了雷克斯·莫特拉姆。

Rex’s age was greatly in his favor, for among Julia’s friends there was a

kind of gerontophilic snobbery; young men were held to be gauche and

pimply; it was thought very much more chic to be seen lunching alone at

the Ritz—a thing, in any case, allowed to few girls of that day, to the tiny

circle of Julia’s intimates; a thing looked at askance by the elders who kept

the score, chatting pleasantly against the walls of the ballrooms—at the

table on the left as you came in, with a starched and wrinkled old roué

whom your mother had been warned of as a girl, than in the center of the

room with a party of exuberant young bloods. Rex, indeed, was neither

starched nor wrinkled; his seniors thought him a pushful young cad, but

Julia recognized the unmistakable chic—the flavor of “Max” and “F.E.” and

the Prince of Wales, of the big table in the Sporting Club, the second

magnum, and the fourth cigar, of the chauffeur kept waiting hour after hour

without compunction—which her friends would envy. His social position

was unique; it had an air of mystery, even of crime, about it; people said

Rex went about armed. Julia and her friends had a fascinated abhorrence of

what they called “Pont Street”; they collected phrases that damned their

user, and among themselves—and often, disconcertingly, in public—talked

a language made up of them. It was “Pont Street” to wear a signet ring and

to give chocolates at the theatre; it was “Pont Street” at a dance to say, “Can

I forage for you?” Whatever Rex might be, he was definitely not “Pont

Street.” He had stepped straight from the underworld into the world of

Brenda Champion who was herself the innermost of a number of concentric

ivory spheres. Perhaps Julia recognized in Brenda Champion an intimation

of what she and her friends might be in twelve years’ time; there was an

antagonism between the girl and the woman that was hard to explain

otherwise. Certainly the fact of his being Brenda Champion’s property

sharpened Julia’s appetite for Rex.

雷克斯的年龄对他非常有利，因为在朱莉娅的朋友中，有一种老年

势利;年轻人被认为是高雅和疙瘩;人们认为在丽兹酒店独自吃午饭要

时髦得多——无论如何，当时很少有女孩允许这样做，在朱莉娅的亲

密小圈子里;守着分数的长老们看着阿肯斯，靠在舞厅的墙壁上愉快地

聊天——当你进来时，在左边的桌子上，有一个满脸皱纹的老鲁埃，

你母亲在小时候就被警告过，而不是在房间的中央，有一群充满活力

的年轻人。事实上，雷克斯既没有上浆，也没有起皱;他的前辈们认为

他是一个咄咄逼人的年轻干部，但茱莉亚认出了他无可挑剔的时髦

——“麦克斯”和“F.E.”的味道，威尔士亲王的味道，体育俱乐部的大桌

子，第二杯大酒和第四支雪茄的味道，司机一小时又一小时地等待，

没有自满——她的朋友们会羡慕的。他的社会地位是独一无二的;它有

一种神秘的气息，甚至是犯罪的气息;人们说雷克斯全副武装。茱莉亚

和她的朋友们对他们所谓的“桥街”有一种着迷的憎恶。他们收集了诅

咒用户的短语，并在他们之间——而且经常令人不安地在公共场合

——谈论一种由它们组成的语言。在剧院里戴图章戒指和送巧克力是

“桥街”;是“庞特街”在舞会上说：“我可以为你觅食吗？不管雷克斯是什

么，他绝对不是“庞特街”。他直接从冥界踏入了布伦达·冠军的世界，

布伦达·冠军本身就是许多同心象牙球体的最内层。也许茱莉亚在布伦

达·冠军身上看到了她和她的朋友们在十二年后可能是什么样子的暗示;

女孩和女人之间有一种难以解释的对立。当然，他是布伦达冠军的财

产这一事实增加了朱莉娅对雷克斯的胃口。

Rex and Brenda Champion were staying at the next villa on Cap Ferrat,

taken that year by a newspaper magnate and frequented by politicians. They

would not normally have come within Lady Rosscommon’s ambit, but,

living so close, the parties mingled and at once Rex began warily to pay his

court.

Rex 和 Brenda Champion 住在 Cap Ferrat 的下一栋别墅里，当年被

一位报业大亨带走，政客们经常光顾。他们通常不会进入罗斯康姆夫

人的范围，但是，由于住得如此之近，双方混在一起，雷克斯立即开

始小心翼翼地向他的法庭付款。

All that summer he had been feeling restless. Mrs. Champion had

proved a dead end; it had all been intensely exciting at first, but now the

bonds had begun to chafe. Mrs. Champion lived as, he found, the English

seemed apt to do, in a little world within a little world; Rex demanded a

wider horizon. He wanted to consolidate his gains; to strike the black

ensign, go ashore, hang the cutlass up over the chimney and think about the

crops. It was time he married; he, too, was in search of a “Eustace,” but,

living as he did, he met few girls. He knew of Julia; she was by all accounts

top debutante, a suitable prize.

整个夏天，他一直感到不安。冠军夫人被证明是一条死胡同;起

初，这一切都非常令人兴奋，但现在纽带开始变得懊恼。他发现，冠

军夫人生活在一个小世界里，英国人似乎很适合做这种生活;雷克斯要

求更广阔的视野。他想巩固自己的成果;要击中黑色少尉，上岸，将弯

刀挂在烟囱上，想想庄稼。现在是他结婚的时候了;他也在寻找一个

“尤斯塔斯”，但是，像他一样生活，他遇到的女孩很少。他知道茱莉

亚;从各方面来看，她都是顶级新秀，是一个合适的奖项。

With Mrs. Champion’s cold eyes watching behind her sun-glasses, there

was little Rex could do at Cap Ferrat except establish a friendliness which

could be widened later. He was never entirely alone with Julia, but he saw

to it that she was included in most things they did; he taught her chemin-de-

fer, he arranged that it was always in his car that they drove to Monte Carlo

or Nice; he did enough to make Lady Rosscommon write to Lady

Marchmain, and Mrs. Champion move him, sooner than they had planned,

to Antibes.

冠军夫人冷冷的眼睛在她的墨镜后面注视着，雷克斯在费拉特角几

乎无能为力，除了建立一种以后可以扩大的友好关系。他从来没有完

全和茱莉亚单独相处，但他确保她参与他们所做的大多数事情;他教她

化学知识，他安排他们总是在他的车里开车去蒙特卡洛或尼斯;他做了

足够多的事情，让罗斯康芒夫人写信给马奇曼夫人，冠军夫人比他们

计划的更早地把他搬到昂蒂布。

Julia went to Salzburg to join her mother.

茱莉亚去萨尔茨堡与母亲团聚。

“Aunt Fanny tells me you made great friends with Mr. Mottram. I’m

sure he can’t be very nice.”

“范妮姨妈告诉我，你和莫特拉姆先生是好朋友。我敢肯定他不会

很好。

“I don’t think he is,” said Julia. “I don’t know that I like nice people.”

“我不认为他是，”朱莉娅说。“我不知道我喜欢好人。”

There is proverbially a mystery among most men of new wealth, how

they made their first ten thousand; it is the qualities they showed then,

before they became bullies, when every man was someone to be placated,

when only hope sustained them and they could count on nothing from the

world but what could be charmed from it, that make them, if they survive

their triumph, successful with women. Rex, in the comparative freedom of

London, became abject to Julia; he planned his life about hers, going where

he would meet her, ingratiating himself with those who could report well of

him to her; he sat on a number of charitable committees in order to be near

Lady Marchmain; he offered his services to Brideshead in getting him a seat

in Parliament (but was there rebuffed); he expressed a keen interest in the

Catholic Church until he found that this was no way to Julia’s heart. He was

always ready to drive her in his Hispano wherever she wanted to go; he

took her and parties of her friends to ring-side seats at prize-fights and

introduced them afterwards to the pugilists; and all the time he never once

made love to her. From being agreeable, he became indispensable to her;

from having been proud of him in public she became a little ashamed, but

by that time, between Christmas and Easter, he had become indispensable.

And then, without in the least expecting it, she suddenly found herself in

love.

众所周知，在大多数新财富的人中，有一个谜，他们是如何赚到第

一万的;正是他们在成为恶霸之前所表现出的品质，当每个人都是需要

安抚的人时，当只有希望支撑着他们，他们不能指望世界上任何东

西，只能从中得到什么，如果他们在胜利中幸存下来，就会在女人身

上取得成功。雷克斯，在相对自由的伦敦，对朱莉娅变得卑鄙;他计划

着她的生活，去他会见她的地方，讨好那些能向她报告他的人;他参加

了许多慈善委员会，以便靠近马奇曼夫人;他向布里德斯黑德提出要为

他在议会中争取一个席位（但被拒绝了）;他对天主教会表现出浓厚的

兴趣，直到他发现这并不能打动朱莉娅的心。他随时准备开着他的西

班牙车载着她去她想去的任何地方;他把她和她的朋友带到有奖比赛的

擂台边座位上，然后把他们介绍给拳击手;一直以来，他从未和她做过

爱。从和蔼可亲，他成为她不可或缺的一部分;从在公共场合为他感到

骄傲，她变得有点羞愧，但到那时，在圣诞节和复活节之间，他已经

变得不可或缺。然后，丝毫没有预料到，她突然发现自己恋爱了。

It came to her, this disturbing and unsought revelation, one evening in

May, when Rex had told her he would be busy at the House, and, driving by

chance down Charles Street, she saw him leaving what she knew to be

Brenda Champion’s house. She was so hurt and angry that she could barely

keep up appearances through dinner; as soon as she could, she went home

and cried bitterly for ten minutes; then she felt hungry, wished she had

eaten more at dinner, ordered some bread-and-milk, and went to bed saying:

“When Mr. Mottram telephones in the morning, whatever time it is, say I

am not to be disturbed.”

五月的一个晚上，当雷克斯告诉她他会在房子里忙的时候，她突然

想到了这个令人不安和不受欢迎的启示，偶然开车沿着查尔斯街行

驶，她看到他离开了她所知道的布伦达冠军的房子。她非常受伤和愤

怒，以至于她几乎无法在晚餐时保持露面;她一有空就回家，痛哭了十

分钟;然后她觉得饿了，希望晚饭时多吃点，点了一些面包和牛奶，然

后上床睡觉说：“当莫特拉姆先生早上打电话时，不管现在是什么时

间，都说不要打扰我。

Next day she breakfasted in bed as usual, read the papers, telephoned to

her friends. Finally she asked: “Did Mr. Mottram ring up by any chance?”

第二天，她像往常一样在床上吃早餐，看报纸，打电话给朋友。最

后，她问道：“莫特拉姆先生有没有打来电话？

“Oh yes, my lady, four times. Shall I put him through when he rings

again?”

“哦，是的，我的夫人，四次。当他再次响起时，我可以把他放过

去吗？

“Yes. No. Say I’ve gone out.”

“是的。不。说我出去了。

When she came downstairs there was a message for her on the hall table.

Mr. Mottram expects Lady Julia at the Ritz at 1:30. “I shall lunch at home

today,” she said.

当她下楼时，大厅的桌子上有一条消息要给她。莫特拉姆先生预计

朱莉娅夫人将于1：30在丽兹酒店见面。“我今天在家吃午饭，”她说。

That afternoon she went shopping with her mother; they had tea with an

aunt and returned at six.

那天下午，她和母亲一起去购物;他们和一位阿姨喝茶，六点回

来。

“Mr. Mottram is waiting, my Lady. I’ve shown him into the library.”

“莫特拉姆先生在等着，我的夫人。我带他进了图书馆。

“Oh, mummy, I can’t be bothered with him. Do tell him to go home.”

“哦，妈妈，我不能打扰他。告诉他回家吧。

“That’s not at all kind, Julia. I’ve often said he’s not my favorite among

your friends, but I have grown quite used to him, almost to like him. You

really mustn’t take people up and drop them like this—particularly people

like Mr. Mottram.”

“那一点也不客气，茱莉亚。我经常说，在你的朋友中，他不是我

最喜欢的，但我已经习惯了他，几乎喜欢他。你真的不能像这样把人

带上去，然后把他们扔下来——尤其是像莫特拉姆先生这样的人。

“Oh, mummy, must I see him? There’ll be a scene if I do.”

“哦，妈妈，我必须见他吗？如果我这样做了，就会有一幕。

“Nonsense, Julia, you twist that poor man round your finger.”

“胡说八道，茱莉亚，你把那个可怜的人缠在手指上。”

So Julia went into the library and came out an hour later engaged to be

married.

于是茱莉亚走进图书馆，一个小时后出来订婚了。

“Oh, mummy, I warned you this would happen if I went in there.”

“哦，妈妈，我警告过你，如果我进去，就会发生这种情况。”

“You did nothing of the kind. You merely said there would be a scene. I

never conceived of a scene of this kind.”

“你什么也没做。你只是说会有一个场景。我从来没想过会有这样

的场景。

“Anyway, you do like him, mummy. You said so.”

“不管怎么说，你确实喜欢他，妈妈。你是这么说的。

“He has been very kind in a number of ways. I regard him as entirely

unsuitable as your husband. So will everyone.”

“他在很多方面都非常友善。我认为他完全不适合你的丈夫。每个

人都会这样。

“Damn everybody.”

“该死的所有人。”

“We know nothing about him. He may have black blood—in fact he is

suspiciously dark. Darling, the whole thing’s impossible. I can’t see how

you can have been so foolish.”

“我们对他一无所知。他可能有黑色的血液——事实上，他可疑地

黑。亲爱的，整件事都是不可能的。我看不出你怎么会这么傻。

“Well, what right have I got otherwise to be angry with him if he goes

with that horrible old woman? You make a great thing about rescuing fallen

women. Well, I’m rescuing a fallen man for a change. I’m saving Rex from

mortal sin.”

“好吧，如果他和那个可怕的老太婆在一起，我还有什么权利对他

生气呢？你在拯救堕落的女人方面做了一件大事。好吧，我正在拯救

一个堕落的人来改变。我要把雷克斯从致命的罪孽中拯救出来。

“Don’t be irreverent, Julia.”

“别不敬，茱莉亚。”

“Well, isn’t it mortal sin to sleep with Brenda Champion?”

“嗯，和布伦达冠军上床不是大罪吗？”

“Or indecent.”

“或者不雅。”

“He’s promised never to see her again. I couldn’t ask him to do that

unless I admitted I was in love with him, could I?”

“他答应再也见不到她了。除非我承认我爱上了他，否则我不能要

求他这样做，不是吗？

“Mrs. Champion’s morals, thank God, are not my business. Your

happiness is. If you must know, I think Mr. Mottram a kind and useful

friend, but I wouldn’t trust him an inch, and I’m sure he’ll have very

unpleasant children. They always revert. I’ve no doubt you’ll regret the

whole thing in a few days. Meanwhile nothing is to be done. No one must

be told anything or allowed to suspect. You must stop lunching with him.

You may see him here, of course, but nowhere in public. You had better

send him to me and I will have a little talk to him about it.”

“谢天谢地，冠军夫人的道德不关我的事。你的幸福是。如果你一

定要知道，我认为莫特拉姆先生是一个善良而有用的朋友，但我不会

相信他，我相信他会生出非常不愉快的孩子。他们总是还原。我毫不

怀疑你会在几天内后悔整件事。与此同时，什么也做不了。任何人都

不得被告知任何事情或允许怀疑。你必须停止和他一起吃午饭。当

然，你可能会在这里看到他，但在公共场合却看不到他。你最好把他

送到我这里来，我会和他谈谈这件事。

Thus began a year’s secret engagement for Julia; a time of great stress,

for Rex made love to her that afternoon for the first time; not, as had

happened to her once or twice before with sentimental and uncertain boys,

but with a passion that disclosed the corner of something like it in her. Their

passion frightened her, and she came back from the confessional one day

determined to put an end to it.

就这样开始了朱莉娅一年的秘密订婚;那是一段压力很大的时期，

因为那天下午雷克斯第一次和她做爱;不是像她以前对多愁善感和不确

定的男孩发生过一两次那样，而是带着一种激情，揭示了她身上类似

的东西的角落。他们的激情吓坏了她，有一天她从忏悔中回来，决心

结束它。

“Otherwise I must stop seeing you,” she said.

“否则我必须不再见你，”她说。

Rex was humble at once, just as he had been in the winter, day after day,

when he used to wait for her in the cold in his big car.

雷克斯一下子就谦虚起来了，就像他在冬天一样，日复一日，他常

常在他的大车里在寒冷中等她。

“If only we could be married immediately,” she said.

“如果我们能立即结婚就好了，”她说。

For six weeks they remained at arm’s length, kissing when they met and

parted, sitting meantime at a distance, talking of what they would do and

where they would live and of Rex’s chances of an under-secretaryship. Julia

was content, deep in love, living in the future. Then, just before the end of

the session, she learned that Rex had been staying the week-end with a

stockbroker at Sunningdale, when he said he was at his constituency, and

that Mrs. Champion had been there, too.

在六个星期的时间里，他们保持着一定的距离，见面和分手时亲

吻，同时坐在远处，谈论他们将做什么，他们将住在哪里，以及雷克

斯担任副部长的机会。茱莉亚很满足，深深地爱着，活在未来。然

后，就在会议结束前，她得知雷克斯周末一直和桑宁代尔的一位股票

经纪人住在一起，当时他说他在他的选区，而冠军夫人也在那里。

On the evening she heard of this, when Rex came as usual to Marchmain

House, they re-enacted the scene of two months before.

在她听说这件事的那天晚上，当雷克斯像往常一样来到马奇曼府

时，他们重演了两个月前的场景。

“What do you expect?” he said. “What right have you to ask so much,

when you give so little?”

“你期待什么？”他说。“你给的这么少，你有什么权利要求这么

多？”

She took her problem to Farm Street and propounded it in general terms,

not in the confessional, but in a dark little parlor kept for such interviews.

她把她的问题带到了农场街，并笼统地提出了这个问题，不是在忏

悔室里，而是在一个黑暗的小客厅里，专门为这样的采访而设。

“Surely, Father, it can’t be wrong to commit a small sin myself in order

to keep him from a much worse one?”

“当然，父亲，我自己犯了一点小罪，使他免于遭受更严重的罪

孽，这不会是错的吗？”

But the gentle old Jesuit was unyielding. She barely listened to him; he

was refusing her what she wanted, that was all she needed to know.

但这位温柔的老耶稣会士却不屈不挠。她几乎不听他说话;他拒绝

了她想要的东西，这就是她需要知道的一切。

When he had finished he said, “Now you had better make your

confession.”

“说完，他说：”现在你最好认罪了。

“No, thank you,” she said, as though refusing the offer of something in a

shop. “I don’t think I want to today,” and walked angrily home.

“不，谢谢你，”她说，好像拒绝了商店里的东西。“我想我今天不

想，”然后生气地走回家。

From that moment she shut her mind against her religion.

从那一刻起，她就对自己的宗教关闭了思想。

And Lady Marchmain saw this and added it to her new grief for

Sebastian and her old grief for her husband and to the deadly sickness in her

body, and took all these sorrows with her daily to church; it seemed her

heart was transfixed with the swords of her dolors, a living heart to match

the plaster and paint; what comfort she took home with her, God knows.

马奇曼夫人看到了这一点，就把它添加到她对塞巴斯蒂安的新悲伤

和她对丈夫的旧悲伤以及她身体的致命疾病中，并每天带着所有这些

悲伤去教堂。她的心似乎被她的剑迷住了，一颗活生生的心，与石膏

和油漆相匹配;她带回家的安慰是什么，天知道。

So the year wore on and the secret of the engagement spread from Julia’s

confidantes to their confidantes, until, like ripples at last breaking on the

mud-verge, there were hints of it in the Press, and Lady Rosscommon as

Lady-in-Waiting was closely questioned about it, and something had to be

done. Then, after Julia had refused to make her Christmas communion and

Lady Marchmain had found herself betrayed first by me, then by Mr.

Samgrass, then by Cordelia, in the first gray days of 1925, she decided to

act. She forbade all talk of an engagement; she forbade Julia and Rex ever

to meet; she made plans for shutting Marchmain House for six months and

taking Julia on a tour of visits to their foreign kinsmen. It was characteristic

of an old, atavistic callousness that went with her delicacy that, even at this

crisis, she did not think it unreasonable to put Sebastian in Rex’s charge on

the journey to Dr. Borethus, and Rex, having failed her in that matter, went

on to Monte Carlo, where he completed her rout. Lord Marchmain did not

concern himself with the finer points of Rex’s character; those, he believed,

were his daughter’s business. Rex seemed a rough, healthy, prosperous

fellow whose name was already familiar to him from reading the political

reports; he gambled in an open-handed but sensible manner; he seemed to

keep reasonably good company; he had a future; Lady Marchmain disliked

him. Lord Marchmain was, on the whole, relieved that Julia should have

chosen so well, and gave his consent to an immediate marriage.

就这样，一年过去了，订婚的秘密从茱莉亚的红颜知己传到了他们的

红颜知己，直到，就像涟漪终于在泥泞的边缘破裂一样，媒体上有了

它的暗示，作为侍女的罗斯康芒夫人受到了严密的询问，必须做点什

么。然后，在茱莉亚拒绝参加圣诞圣餐之后，马奇曼夫人发现自己在

1925年的第一个灰色日子里先是被我出卖了，然后是萨姆格拉斯先

生，然后是科迪莉亚出卖了，她决定采取行动。她禁止一切关于订婚

的言论;她禁止茱莉亚和雷克斯见面;她计划关闭马奇曼之家六个月，

并带朱莉娅去拜访他们的外国亲戚。这是与她的细腻相伴而生的古

老、冷漠的特征，即使在这种危机中，她也不认为让塞巴斯蒂安负责

雷克斯去博雷瑟斯博士的旅程是不合理的，而雷克斯在这件事上辜负

了她，继续前往蒙特卡洛，在那里他完成了她的溃败。马奇曼勋爵并

不关心雷克斯性格的细节;他相信，这些都是他女儿的事。雷克斯似乎

是一个粗犷、健康、繁荣的家伙，他的名字在阅读政治报道时已经很

熟悉了;他以一种开放但明智的方式赌博;他似乎保持着相当好的陪伴;

他有未来;马奇曼夫人不喜欢他。总的来说，马奇曼勋爵对茱莉亚应该

做出如此好的选择感到宽慰，并同意立即结婚。

Rex gave himself to the preparations with gusto. He bought her a ring,

not, as she expected, from a tray at Cartier’s, but in a back room in Hatton

Garden from a man who brought stones out of a safe in little bags and

displayed them for her on a writing-desk; then another man in another back

room made designs for the setting with a stub of pencil on a sheet of

notepaper, and the result excited the admiration of all her friends.

雷克斯兴致勃勃地投入到准备工作中。他给她买了一枚戒指，不是

像她想象的那样，从卡地亚的托盘里，而是在哈顿花园的一间密室

里，从一个男人那里买来的，他从保险箱里拿出石头装在小袋子里，

放在写字台上给她看;然后，另一个房间里的另一个男人用一支铅笔在

一张便条纸上设计了这个场景，结果激起了她所有朋友的钦佩。

“How d’you know about these things, Rex?” she asked.

“你是怎么知道这些事情的，雷克斯？”她问。

She was daily surprised by the things he knew and the things he did not

know; both, at the time, added to his attraction.

她每天都对他知道的事情和他不知道的事情感到惊讶;在当时，两

者都增加了他的吸引力。

His present house in Hertford Street was large enough for them both,

and had lately been furnished and decorated by the most expensive firm.

Julia said she did not want a house in the country yet; they could always

take places furnished when they wanted to go away.

他现在在赫特福德街的房子足够他们俩住，最近由最昂贵的公司提

供家具和装饰。茱莉亚说她还不想在乡下买房子;当他们想离开时，他

们总是可以坐在带家具的地方。

There was trouble about the marriage settlement with which Julia

refused to interest herself. The lawyers were in despair. Rex absolutely

refused to settle any capital. “What do I want with trustee stock?” he asked.

关于婚姻协议的麻烦，朱莉娅拒绝对自己感兴趣。律师们感到绝

望。雷克斯绝对拒绝结算任何资本。“我想要什么受托人股票？”他问

道。

“I don’t know, darling.”

“我不知道，亲爱的。”

“I make money work for me,” he said. “I expect fifteen, twenty per cent

and I get it. It’s pure waste tying up capital at three and a half.”

“我让钱为我工作，”他说。“我预计15%、20%，我明白了。这纯粹

是浪费，把资本绑在了三分半。

“I’m sure it is, darling.”

“我确定是这样，亲爱的。”

“These fellows talk as though I were trying to rob you. It’s they who are

doing the robbing. They want to rob you of two-thirds of the income I can

make you.”

“这些家伙说话好像我是想抢劫你。是他们在抢劫。他们想抢走我

能给你的收入的三分之二。

“Does it matter, Rex? We’ve got heaps, haven’t we?”

“有关系吗，雷克斯？我们有一堆，不是吗？

Rex hoped to have the whole of Julia’s dowry in his hands, to make it

work for him. The lawyers insisted on tying it up, but they could not get, as

they asked, a like sum from him. Finally, grudgingly, he agreed to insure his

life, after explaining at length to the lawyers that this was merely a device

for putting part of his legitimate profits into other people’s pockets; but he

had some connection with an insurance office which made the arrangement

slightly less painful to him, by which he took for himself the agent’s

commission which the lawyers were themselves expecting.

雷克斯希望把茱莉亚的全部嫁妆都掌握在他手中，让它为他工作。

律师们坚持要把它绑起来，但他们不能像他们要求的那样从他那里得

到同样的钱。最后，他勉强同意为自己的生命投保，在向律师详细解

释这只是将他的部分合法利润放入他人口袋的手段之后;但他与一家保

险公司有某种联系，这使这种安排对他来说稍微不那么痛苦，他通过

这种安排将律师自己所期望的代理人佣金据为己有。

Last and least came the question of Rex’s religion. He had once attended

a royal wedding in Madrid, and he wanted something of the kind for

himself.

最后也是最不重要的一点是雷克斯的宗教信仰问题。他曾经参加过

马德里的皇室婚礼，他想为自己做点什么。

“That’s one thing your Church can do,” he said, “put on a good show.

You never saw anything to equal the cardinals. How many do you have in

England?”

“这是你们教会能做的一件事，”他说，“上演一场好戏。你从来没

有看到任何可以与红衣主教相提并论的东西。你在英国有多少人？

“Only one, darling.”

“只有一个，亲爱的。”

“Only one? Can we hire some others from abroad?”

“只有一个？我们能从国外雇一些人吗？

It was then explained to him that a mixed marriage was a very

unostentatious affair.

然后有人向他解释说，异族通婚是一件非常不张扬的事情。

“How d’you mean “mixed”? I’m not a nigger or anything.”

“你怎么说'混合'？我不是黑鬼什么的。

“No, darling, between a Catholic and a Protestant.”

“不，亲爱的，介于天主教徒和新教徒之间。”

“Oh, that? Well, if that’s all, it’s soon unmixed. I’ll become a Catholic.

What does one have to do?”

“哦，那个？好吧，如果仅此而已，它很快就会被混合起来。我会

成为一名天主教徒。一个人必须做什么？

Lady Marchmain was dismayed and perplexed by this new

development; it was no good her telling herself that in charity she must

assume his good faith; it brought back memories of another courtship and

another conversion.

马奇曼夫人对这一新发展感到沮丧和困惑。她告诉自己，在慈善事

业中，她必须承担他的诚意，这是不好的;它唤起了另一次求爱和另一

次皈依的回忆。

“Rex,” she said. “I sometimes wonder if you realize how big a thing you

are taking on in the Faith. It would be very wicked to take a step like this

without believing sincerely.”

“雷克斯，”她说。“我有时想知道你是否意识到你在信仰中承担了

多大的事情。不真诚地相信就迈出这样的一步，将是非常邪恶的。

He was masterly in his treatment of her.

他对待她很熟练。

“I don’t pretend to be a very devout man,” he said, “nor much of a

theologian, but I know it’s a bad plan to have two religions in one house. A

man needs a religion. If your Church is good enough for Julia, it’s good

enough for me.”

“我不假装自己是一个非常虔诚的人，”他说，“也不怎么像个神学

家，但我知道在一个房子里有两个宗教是一个糟糕的计划。一个人需

要一种宗教。如果你的教会对茱莉亚足够好，那对我来说也足够好。

“Very well,” she said, “I will see about having you instructed.”

“很好，”她说，“我会看看你有没有得到指示。

“Look, Lady Marchmain, I haven’t the time. Instruction will be wasted

on me. Just you give me the form and I’ll sign on the dotted line.”

“听着，马奇曼夫人，我没有时间。指导将浪费在我身上。只要你

把表格给我，我就会在虚线上签字。

“It usually takes some months—often a lifetime.”

“这通常需要几个月的时间，通常是一辈子。

“Well, I’m a quick learner. Try me.”

“嗯，我学得很快。试试我。

So Rex was sent to Farm Street to Father Mowbray, a priest renowned

for his triumphs with obdurate catechumens. After the third interview he

came to tea with Lady Marchmain.

因此，雷克斯被送到农场街去见莫布雷神父，他是一位以与顽固的

慕道者一起取得胜利而闻名的牧师。第三次面谈后，他和马奇曼夫人

一起喝茶。

“Well, how do you find my future son-in-law?”

“嗯，你怎么找到我未来的女婿？”

“He’s the most difficult convert I have ever met.”

“他是我见过的最难皈依的人。”

“Oh dear, I thought he was going to make it so easy.”

“哦，天哪，我还以为他会让事情变得这么简单呢。”

“That’s exactly it. I can’t get anywhere near him. He doesn’t seem to

have the least intellectual curiosity or natural piety.

“就是这样。我离他不远。他似乎没有丝毫的求知欲或天生的虔

诚。

“The first day I wanted to find out what sort of religious life he had till

now, so I asked him what he meant by prayer. He said: “I don’t mean

anything. You tell me.” I tried to, in a few words, and he said: “Right. So

much for prayer. What’s the next thing?” I gave him the catechism to take

away. Yesterday I asked him whether Our Lord had more than one nature.

He said: “Just as many as you say, Father.”

“第一天，我想知道他到现在为止还有什么样的宗教生活，所以我

问他祈祷是什么意思。他说：“我什么都不是。你告诉我。我试着用几

句话说，他说：“对。祷告就这么多。接下来要做什么？我把教理问答

给了他，让他带走。昨天我问他，我们的主是否具有不止一种本性。

他说：“父亲，你说的就有多少。

“Then again I asked him: “Supposing the Pope looked up and saw a

cloud and said ‘It’s going to rain,’ would that be bound to happen?” “Oh,

yes, Father.” “But supposing it didn’t?” He thought a moment and said, “I

suppose it would be sort of raining spiritually, only we were too sinful to

see it.”

“然后我又问他：”假设教皇抬起头，看到一朵云，说'要下雨了'，

那一定会发生吗？”“哦，是的，父亲。”“但假设它没有呢？”他想了一

会儿，说：“我想这在灵性上会下雨，只是我们太罪恶了，看不到它。

“Lady Marchmain, he doesn’t correspond to any degree of paganism

known to the missionaries.”

“马奇曼夫人，他不符合传教士所知道的任何程度的异教。

“Julia,” said Lady Marchmain, when the priest had gone, “are you sure

that Rex isn’t doing this thing purely with the idea of pleasing us?”

“茱莉亚，”马奇曼夫人说，当神父走后，“你确定雷克斯做这件事

不纯粹是为了取悦我们吗？”

“I don’t think it enters his head,” said Julia.

“我不认为它进入了他的脑海，”朱莉娅说。

“He’s really sincere in his conversion?”

“他真的真诚地皈依了吗？”

“He’s absolutely determined to become a Catholic, mummy,” and to

herself she said: “In her long history the Church must have had some pretty

queer converts. I don’t suppose all Clovis’s army were exactly Catholic-

minded. One more won’t hurt.”

“他下定决心要成为一名天主教徒，妈妈，”她对自己说：“在她漫

长的历史中，教会一定有一些非常奇怪的皈依者。我不认为克洛维斯

的所有军队都是天主教徒。再多一个就无伤大雅了。

Next week the Jesuit came to tea again. It was the Easter holidays and

Cordelia was there, too.

下个星期，耶稣会士又来喝茶了。那天是复活节假期，科迪莉亚也

在那里。

“Lady Marchmain,” he said. “You should have chosen one of the

younger fathers for this task. I shall be dead long before Rex is a Catholic.”

“马奇曼夫人，”他说。“你应该选择一位年轻的父亲来完成这项任

务。在雷克斯成为天主教徒之前，我早就死了。

“Oh dear, I thought it was going so well.”

“哦，天哪，我还以为进展得这么顺利呢。”

“It was, in a sense. He was exceptionally docile, said he accepted

everything I told him, remembered bits of it, asked no questions. I wasn’t

happy about him. He seemed to have no sense of reality, but I knew he was

coming under a steady Catholic influence, so I was willing to receive him.

One has to take a chance sometimes—with semi-imbeciles, for instance.

You never know quite how much they have understood. As long as you

know there’s someone to keep an eye on them, you do take the chance.”

“从某种意义上说，确实如此。他特别温顺，说他接受我告诉他的

一切，记住其中的点点滴滴，不问任何问题。我对他不满意。他似乎

没有现实感，但我知道他受到天主教的持续影响，所以我愿意接受

他。有时人们必须冒险——例如，对于半低能儿。你永远不知道他们

理解了多少。只要你知道有人要盯着他们，你就会抓住机会。

“How I wish Rex could hear this!” said Cordelia.

“我多么希望雷克斯能听到这句话！”科迪莉亚说。

“But yesterday I got a regular eye-opener. The trouble with modern

education is you never know how ignorant people are. With anyone over

fifty you can be fairly confident what’s been taught and what’s been left

out. But these young people have such an intelligent, knowledgeable

surface, and then the crust suddenly breaks and you look down into the

depths of confusion you didn’t know existed. Take yesterday. He seemed to

be doing very well. He learned large bits of the catechism by heart, and the

Lord’s Prayer, and the Hail Mary. Then I asked him as usual if there was

anything troubling him, and he looked at me in a crafty way and said,

‘Look, Father, I don’t think you’re being straight with me. I want to join

your Church and I’m going to join your Church, but you’re holding too

much back.’ I asked what he meant, and he said: ‘I’ve had a long talk with a

Catholic—a very pious, well-educated one, and I’ve learned a thing or two.

For instance, that you have to sleep with your feet pointing East because

that’s the direction of heaven, and if you die in the night you can walk there.

Now I’ll sleep with my feet pointing any way that suits Julia, but d’you

expect a grown man to believe about walking to heaven? And what about

the Pope who made one of his horses a Cardinal? And what about the box

you keep in the church porch, and if you put in a pound note with

someone’s name on it, they get sent to hell. I don’t say there mayn’t be a

good reason for all this,’ he said, ‘but you ought to tell me about it and not

let me find out for myself.’ ”

“但昨天我经常大开眼界。现代教育的麻烦在于你永远不知道人们

是多么无知。对于五十岁以上的人，你可以相当自信地知道教了什

么，遗漏了什么。但这些年轻人有如此聪明、知识渊博的表面，然后

地壳突然破裂，你低头看向你不知道存在的混乱深处。以昨天为例。

他似乎做得很好。他背诵了大部分的教理问答、主祷文和万福玛利

亚。然后我像往常一样问他有没有什么困扰他的事情，他狡猾地看着

我说，'听着，父亲，我不认为你对我是直截了当的。我想加入你们的

教会，我也要加入你们的教会，但你太退缩了。我问他是什么意思，

他说：“我和一位天主教徒谈了很久，他是一位非常虔诚、受过良好教

育的人，我学到了一两件事。例如，你必须睡觉时双脚朝东，因为那

是天堂的方向，如果你在晚上死去，你可以走到那里。现在我会用脚

指着任何适合茱莉亚的方式睡觉，但你指望一个成年人相信走到天堂

吗？那么让他的一匹马成为红衣主教的教皇呢？你放在教堂门廊里的

盒子呢，如果你在上面放一张写着某人名字的英镑钞票，他们就会被

送进地狱。我不是说这一切可能没有充分的理由，“他说，”但你应该

告诉我这件事，而不是让我自己去发现。"

“What can the poor man have meant?” said Lady Marchmain.

“这个可怜的人能说什么呢？”马奇曼夫人说。

“You see he’s a long way from the Church yet,” said Father Mowbray.

“你看他离教会还有很长的路要走，”莫布雷神父说。

“But who can he have been talking to? Did he dream it all? Cordelia,

what’s the matter?”

“可是他能和谁说话呢？他做梦了吗？科黛莉亚，怎么了？

“What a chump! Oh, mummy, what a glorious chump!”

“真是个笨蛋！噢，妈咪，真是个光荣的笨蛋！

“Cordelia, it was you.”

“科黛莉亚，是你。”

“Oh, mummy, who could have dreamed he’d swallow it? I told him such

a lot besides. About the sacred monkeys in the Vatican—all kinds of

things.”

“噢，妈咪，谁能想到他会吞下它？此外，我还告诉了他很多。关

于梵蒂冈的圣猴——各种各样的事情。

“Well, you’ve very considerably increased my work,” said Father

Mowbray.

“嗯，你大大增加了我的工作量，”莫布雷神父说。

“Poor Rex,” said Lady Marchmain. “You know, I think it makes him

rather lovable. You must treat him like an idiot child, Father Mowbray.”

“可怜的雷克斯，”马奇曼夫人说。“你知道，我认为这让他相当可

爱。你必须把他当成一个白痴孩子，莫布雷神父。

So the instruction was continued, and Father Mowbray at length

consented to receive Rex a week before his wedding.

于是这个指示继续下去，莫布雷神父终于同意在雷克斯婚礼前一周

接待他。

“You’d think they’d be all over themselves to have me in,” Rex

complained. “I can be a lot of help to them one way and another; instead

they’re like the chaps who issue cards for a casino. What’s more,” he added,

“Cordelia’s got me so muddled I don’t know what’s in the catechism and

what she’s invented.”

“你会认为他们会把我带进来，”雷克斯抱怨道。“我可以以一种和

另一种方式为他们提供很多帮助;相反，他们就像为赌场发卡的小伙

子。更重要的是，“他补充说，”科迪莉亚把我弄得一团糟，我不知道

教理问答里有什么，她发明了什么。

Thus things stood three weeks before the wedding; the cards had gone

out, presents were coming in fast, the bridesmaids were delighted with their

dresses. Then came what Julia called “Bridey’s bombshell.”

因此，事情在婚礼前三周就发生了。卡片已经用完了，礼物很快就

进来了，伴娘们对她们的礼服很满意。然后是茱莉亚所说的“布莱迪的

重磅炸弹”。

With characteristic ruthlessness he tossed his load of explosive without

warning into what, till then, had been a happy family party. The library at

Marchmain House was being devoted to wedding presents; Lady

Marchmain, Julia, Cordelia, and Rex were busy unpacking and listing them.

Brideshead came in and watched them for a moment.

他以特有的冷酷无情，毫无征兆地把他的炸药扔进了在那之前一直

是一个快乐的家庭聚会。Marchmain House的图书馆专门用于存放结婚

礼物;马奇曼夫人、茱莉亚、科迪莉亚和雷克斯正忙着拆开包装并列出

它们。Brideshead走了进来，看了他们一会儿。

“Chinky vases from Aunt Betty,” said Cordelia. “Old stuff. I remember

them on the stairs at Buckborne.”

“贝蒂姨妈送来的花瓶，”科迪莉亚说。“老东西。我记得他们在巴

克伯恩的楼梯上。

“What’s all this?” asked Brideshead.

“这到底是怎么回事？”布里德斯黑德问道。

“Mr., Mrs., and Miss Pendle-Garthwaite, one early morning tea set.

Goode’s, thirty shillings, jolly mean.”

“先生、太太和彭德尔-加思韦特小姐，一套清晨茶具。古德的，三

十先令，快活的卑鄙。

“You’d better pack all that stuff up again.”

“你最好把这些东西都收拾好。”

“Bridey, what do you mean?”

“新娘，你什么意思？”

“Only that the wedding’s off.”

“只是婚礼结束了。”

“Bridey.”

“

新娘。

”

“I thought I’d better make some inquiries about my prospective brother-

in-law, as no one else seemed interested,” said Brideshead. “I got the final

answer tonight. He was married in Montreal in 1915 to a Miss Sarah

Evangeline Cutler, who is still living there.”

“我想我最好对我未来的姐夫打听一下，因为似乎没有其他人感兴

趣，”布里德斯黑德说。“今晚我得到了最终的答案。他于 1915 年在蒙

特利尔与莎拉·伊万杰琳·卡特勒小姐结婚，她仍然住在那里。

“Rex, is this true?”

“雷克斯，这是真的吗？”

Rex stood with a jade dragon in his hand looking at it critically; then he

set it carefully on its ebony stand and smiled openly and innocently at them

all.

雷克斯手里拿着一条玉龙站着，批判地看着它;然后他小心翼翼地

把它放在乌木架子上，对他们露出灿烂而天真的笑容。

“Sure it’s true,” he said. “What about it? What are you all looking so het

up about? She isn’t a thing to me. She never meant any good. I was only a

kid, anyhow. The sort of mistake anyone might make. I got my divorce

back in 1919. I didn’t even know where she was living till Bridey here told

me. What’s all the rumpus?”

“当然是真的，”他说。“那又如何？你们都这么在看什么？她对我

来说不算什么。她从来都不是好事。无论如何，我只是个孩子。任何

人都可能犯的错误。我在1919年离婚了。我什至不知道她住在哪里，

直到布莱迪告诉我。这到底是怎么回事？

“You might have told me,” said Julia.

“你可能已经告诉我了，”朱莉娅说。

“You never asked. Honest, I’ve not given her a thought in years.”

“你从来没问过。老实说，我已经好几年没想过她了。

His sincerity was so plain that they had to sit down and talk about it

calmly.

他的诚意是如此朴素，以至于他们不得不坐下来冷静地谈论它。

“Don’t you realize, you poor sweet oaf,” said Julia, “that you can’t get

married as a Catholic when you’ve another wife alive?”

“难道你不知道，你这个可怜的甜心，”茱莉亚说，“当你有另一个

妻子活着时，你不能以天主教徒的身份结婚吗？

“But I haven’t. Didn’t I just tell you we were divorced six years ago.”

“但我没有。我不是告诉过你我们六年前离婚了吗？

“But you can’t be divorced as a Catholic.”

“但作为天主教徒，你不能离婚。”

“I wasn’t a Catholic and I was divorced. I’ve got the papers

somewhere.”

“我不是天主教徒，我离婚了。我在某处拿到了文件。

“But didn’t Father Mowbray explain to you about marriage?”

“可是莫布雷神父没有跟你解释过婚姻的事吗？”

“He said I wasn’t to be divorced from you. Well, I don’t want to be. I

can’t remember all he told me—sacred monkeys, plenary indulgences, four

last things—if I remembered all he told me I shouldn’t have time for

anything else. Anyhow, what about your Italian cousin, Francesca?—she

married twice.”

“他说我不会和你离婚。好吧，我不想。我不记得他告诉我的所有

事情——神圣的猴子、全体赦免、最后的四件事——如果我记得他告

诉我的一切，我就不应该有时间做其他事情。不管怎么说，你的意大

利表妹弗朗西斯卡呢？她结过两次婚。

“She had an annulment.”

“她被废止了。”

“All right then, I’ll get an annulment. What does it cost? Who do I get it

from? Has Father Mowbray got one? I only want to do what’s right.

Nobody told me.”

“好吧，那我就废止了。费用是多少？我从谁那里得到它？莫布雷

神父有吗？我只想做正确的事。没人告诉我。

It was a long time before Rex could be convinced of the existence of a

serious impediment to his marriage. The discussion took them to dinner, lay

dormant in the presence of the servants, started again as soon as they were

alone, and lasted long after midnight. Up, down, and round the argument

circled and swooped like a gull, now out to sea, out of sight, cloud-bound,

among irrelevances and repetitions, now right on the patch where the offal

floated.

过了很长一段时间，雷克斯才确信他的婚姻存在严重障碍。讨论把

他们带到晚餐上，在仆人面前休眠，一有独处就重新开始，一直持续

到午夜之后。上、下、绕着争论盘旋，像海鸥一样俯冲，现在出海，

看不见，云层缠绕，在无关紧要和重复之间，现在正好在内脏漂浮的

补丁上。

“What d’you want me to do? Who should I see?” Rex kept asking.

“Don’t tell me there isn’t someone who can fix this.”

“你要我做什么？我应该见谁？雷克斯不停地问。“别告诉我没有人

可以解决这个问题。”

“There’s nothing to do, Rex,” said Brideshead. “It simply means your

marriage can’t take place. I’m sorry from everyone’s point of view that it’s

come so suddenly. You ought to have told us yourself.”

“没什么可做的，Rex，”Brideshead说。“这只是意味着你的婚姻不

能发生。从每个人的角度来看，我很抱歉它来得太突然了。你应该自

己告诉我们的。

“Look,” said Rex. “Maybe what you say is right; maybe strictly by law I

shouldn’t get married in your cathedral. But the cathedral is booked; no one

there is asking any questions; the Cardinal knows nothing about it; Father

Mowbray knows nothing about it. Nobody except us knows a thing. So why

make a lot of trouble? Just stay mum and let the thing go through, as if

nothing had happened. Who loses anything by that? Maybe I risk going to

hell. Well, I’ll risk it. What’s it got to do with anyone else?”

“看，”雷克斯说。“也许你说的是对的;也许严格按照法律，我不应

该在你的大教堂里结婚。但是大教堂被预订了;没有人问任何问题;红

衣主教对此一无所知;莫布雷神父对此一无所知。除了我们，没有人知

道任何事情。那么为什么要制造很多麻烦呢？只是保持沉默，让事情

过去，就好像什么都没发生过一样。谁会因此而失去任何东西？也许

我冒着下地狱的风险。好吧，我会冒险的。这和别人有什么关系？

“Why not?” said Julia. “I don’t believe these priests know everything. I

don’t believe in hell for things like that. I don’t know that I believe in it for

anything. Anyway, that’s our look out. We’re not asking you to risk your

souls. Just keep away.”

“为什么不呢？”茱莉亚说。“我不相信这些神父什么都知道。我不

相信这样的事情会下地狱。我不知道我是否相信它。无论如何，这就

是我们的注意事项。我们不是要你拿你的灵魂冒险。离远点就行了。

“Julia, I hate you,” said Cordelia, and left the room.

“茱莉亚，我恨你，”科迪莉亚说，然后离开了房间。

“We’re all tired,” said Lady Marchmain. “If there was anything to say,

I’d suggest our discussing it in the morning.”

“我们都累了，”马奇曼夫人说。“如果有什么要说的，我建议我们

早上再讨论。”

“But there’s nothing to discuss,” said Brideshead, “except what is the

least offensive way we can close the whole incident. Mother and I will

decide that. We must put a notice in The Times and the Morning Post; the

presents will have to go back. I don’t know what is usual about the

bridesmaids’ dresses.”

“但没有什么可讨论的，”布里德斯黑德说，“除了我们可以结束整

个事件的最不令人反感的方式。妈妈和我会决定的。我们必须在《泰

晤士报》和《晨报》上刊登通知;礼物必须回去。我不知道伴娘的礼服

是平时的。

“Just a moment,” said Rex. “Just a moment. Maybe you can stop us

marrying in your cathedral. All right, to hell, we’ll be married in a

Protestant church.”

“等一下，”雷克斯说。“稍等片刻。也许你可以阻止我们在你的大

教堂里结婚。好吧，见鬼去吧，我们会在新教教堂里结婚。

“I can stop that, too,” said Lady Marchmain.

“我也可以阻止它，”马奇曼夫人说。

“But I don’t think you will, mummy,” said Julia. “You see, I’ve been

Rex’s mistress for some time now, and I shall go on being, married or not.”

“但我不认为你会的，妈妈，”朱莉娅说。“你看，我做雷克斯的情

妇已经有一段时间了，不管结婚与否，我都会继续做下去。”

“Rex, is this true?”

“雷克斯，这是真的吗？”

“No damn it, it’s not,” said Rex. “I wish it were.”

“不，该死的，不是，”雷克斯说。“但愿是这样。”

“I see we shall have to discuss it all again in the morning,” said Lady

Marchmain faintly. “I can’t go on any more now.”

“我看我们明天早上还得再讨论一遍，”马奇曼夫人淡淡地说。“我

现在不能再继续下去了。”

And she needed her son’s help up the stairs.

她需要儿子的帮助才能上楼梯。

“What on earth made you tell your mother that?” I asked, when, years later,

Julia described the scene to me.

“你到底是怎么告诉妈的？”我问，多年后，茱莉亚向我描述了当时的

场景。

“That’s exactly what Rex wanted to know. I suppose because I thought it

was true. Not literally—though you must remember I was only twenty, and

no one really knows the ‘facts of life’ by being told them—but, of course, I

didn’t mean it was true literally. I didn’t know how else to express it. I

meant I was much too deep with Rex just to be able to say ‘the marriage

arranged will not now take place,’ and leave it at that. I wanted to be made

an honest woman. I’ve been wanting it ever since—come to think of it.”

“这正是雷克斯想知道的。我想是因为我认为这是真的。不是字面

意思——尽管你一定记得我只有二十岁，没有人通过被告知而真正了

解“生活的事实”——但是，当然，我并不是说这是字面上的真实。我

不知道该怎么表达它。我的意思是，我和雷克斯的关系太深了，以至

于无法说“包办的婚姻现在不会发生”，然后就这样吧。我想成为一个

诚实的女人。从那以后，我就一直想要它——想想看。

“And then?”

“然后呢？”

“And then the talks went on and on. Poor mummy. And priests came

into it and aunts came into it. There were all kinds of suggestions—that Rex

should go to Canada, that Father Mowbray should go to Rome and see if

there were any possible grounds for an annulment; that I should go abroad

for a year. In the middle of it Rex just telegraphed to papa: ‘Julia and I

prefer wedding ceremony take place by Protestant rites. Have you any

objection?’ He answered, ‘Delighted,’ and that settled the matter as far as

mummy stopping us legally went. There was a lot of personal appeal after

that. I was sent to talk to priests and nuns and aunts. Rex just went on

quietly—or fairly quietly—with the plans.

“然后谈判继续进行。可怜的木乃伊。祭司进来了，阿姨们也进来

了。有各种各样的建议——雷克斯应该去加拿大，莫布雷神父应该去

罗马，看看是否有任何可能的理由废除婚姻;我应该出国一年。在中

间，雷克斯刚刚给爸爸打了电报：“朱莉娅和我更喜欢按照新教仪式举

行婚礼。你有什么异议吗？他回答说，“很高兴”，就这样解决了，因

为妈妈合法地阻止了我们。在那之后，有很多个人吸引力。我被派去

与神父、修女和阿姨交谈。雷克斯只是悄悄地——或者相当安静地

——继续执行计划。

“Oh, Charles, what a squalid wedding! The Savoy Chapel was the place

where divorced couples got married in those days—a poky little place not at

all what Rex had intended. I wanted just to slip into a registry office one

morning and get the thing over with a couple of char-women as witnesses,

but nothing else would do but Rex had to have bridesmaids and orange

blossom and the Wedding March. It was gruesome.

“哦，查尔斯，多么肮脏的婚礼！萨沃伊教堂（Savoy Chapel）是当

时离婚夫妇结婚的地方——一个破旧的小地方，根本不是雷克斯的意

图。有一天早上，我只想溜进登记处，和几个女妖作为证人，把事情

搞定，但别无他法，只能让雷克斯有伴娘、橙花和婚礼进行曲。这太

可怕了。

“Poor mummy behaved like a martyr and insisted on my having her lace

in spite of everything. Well, she more or less had to—the dress had been

planned round it. My own friends came, of course, and the curious

accomplices Rex called his friends; the rest of the party were very oddly

assorted. None of mummy’s family came, of course; one or two of papa’s.

All the stuffy people stayed away—you know, the Anchorages and Chasms

and Vanbrughs—and I thought, ‘Thank God for that, they always look

down their noses at me, anyhow,” but Rex was furious, because it was just

them he wanted apparently.

“可怜的妈妈表现得像个烈士，不顾一切坚持要我给她穿花边。好

吧，她或多或少不得不这样做——这件衣服是围绕它计划好的。当

然，我自己的朋友也来了，好奇的同伙雷克斯称他为朋友;派对的其他

人非常奇怪。当然，妈妈的家人都没有来;爸爸的一两个。所有闷闷不

乐的人都远离了——你知道，安克雷奇、峡谷和范布鲁——我想，'感

谢上帝，无论如何，他们总是低头看着我，“但雷克斯很生气，因为显

然他想要的只是他们。

“I hoped at one moment there’d be no party at all. Mummy said we

couldn’t use Marchers, and Rex wanted to telegraph papa and invade the

place with an army of caterers headed by the family solicitor. In the end it

was decided to have a party the evening before at home to see the presents

—apparently that was all right according to Father Mowbray. Well, no one

can ever resist going to see her own present, so that was quite a success, but

the reception Rex gave next day at the Savoy for the wedding guests was

very squalid.

“我希望在某一刻根本没有派对。妈妈说我们不能使用游行者，雷

克斯想给爸爸打电报，然后带着以家庭律师为首的餐饮服务商大军入

侵这个地方。最后，他们决定前一天晚上在家里开个派对，看看礼物

——显然，根据莫布雷神父的说法，这没问题。好吧，没有人能抗拒

去看她自己的礼物，所以这是相当成功的，但雷克斯第二天在萨沃伊

酒店为婚礼客人举办的招待会非常肮脏。

“There was great awkwardness about the tenants. In the end Bridey went

down and gave them a dinner and bonfire there which wasn’t at all what

they expected in return for their silver soup tureen.

“房客非常尴尬。最后，布莱迪下去，在那里给他们吃了一顿晚餐

和篝火晚会，这完全不是他们所期望的，以换取他们的银汤。

“Poor Cordelia took it hardest. She had looked forward so much to being

my bridesmaid—it was a thing we used to talk about long before I came out

—and of course she was a very pious child, too. At first she wouldn’t speak

to me. Then on the morning of the wedding—I’d moved to Aunt Fanny

Rosscommon’s the evening before; it was thought more suitable—she came

bursting in before I was up, straight from Farm Street, in floods of tears,

begged me not to marry, then hugged me, gave me a dear little brooch she’d

bought, and said she prayed I’d always be happy. Always happy, Charles!

“可怜的科迪莉亚承受得最艰难。她非常期待成为我的伴娘——在

我出柜之前很久，我们就经常谈论这件事——当然，她也是一个非常

虔诚的孩子。起初她不肯和我说话。然后，在婚礼的那天早上——前

一天晚上我搬到了范妮·罗斯康姆姨妈家;人们认为这更合适——她在我

起床之前突然闯进来，直接从农场街出来，泪流满面，恳求我不要结

婚，然后拥抱我，给了我一枚她买的亲爱的小胸针，并说她祈祷我会

永远幸福。永远快乐，查尔斯！

“It was an awfully unpopular wedding, you know. Everyone took

mummy’s side, as everyone always did—not that she got any benefit from

it. All through her life mummy had all the sympathy of everyone except

those she loved. They all said I’d behaved abominably to her. In fact, poor

Rex found he’d married an outcast, which was exactly the opposite of all

he’d wanted.

“这是一场非常不受欢迎的婚礼，你知道的。每个人都站在妈妈一

边，就像大家一直做的那样——并不是说她从中得到了任何好处。在

她的一生中，妈妈得到了所有人的同情，除了她所爱的人。他们都说

我对她表现得很糟糕。事实上，可怜的雷克斯发现他娶了一个被抛弃

的人，这与他想要的完全相反。

“So you see things never looked like going right. There was a hoodoo on

us from the start. But I was still nuts about Rex.

“所以你看到事情看起来从来都不是正确的。我们从一开始就有一

个不祥之兆。但我仍然对雷克斯很着迷。

“Funny to think of, isn’t it?

“想想都挺好笑的，不是吗？

“You know Father Mowbray hit on the truth about Rex at once, that it

took me a year of marriage to see. He simply wasn’t all there. He wasn’t a

complete human being at all. He was a tiny bit of one, unnaturally

developed; something in a bottle, an organ kept alive in a laboratory. I

thought he was a sort of primitive savage, but he was something absolutely

modern and up-to-date that only this ghastly age could produce. A tiny bit

of a man pretending he was the whole.

“你知道莫布雷神父一下子就发现了关于雷克斯的真相，我花了一

年的婚姻才看清。他根本不在那里。他根本不是一个完整的人。他是

一个小小的，不自然地发展;瓶子里的东西，一个在实验室里活着的器

官。我以为他是一个原始的野蛮人，但他绝对是现代的和最新的，只

有这个可怕的时代才能产生。一个假装自己是整体的男人的一点点。

“Well, it’s all over now.”

“嗯，现在一切都结束了。”

It was ten years later that she said this to me in a storm in the Atlantic.

十年后，她在大西洋的一场暴风雨中对我说了这句话。

Three

三

I returned to London in the spring of 1926 for the General Strike.

1926年春天，我回到伦敦参加总罢工。

It was the topic of Paris. The French, exultant as always at the

discomfiture of their former friends, and transposing into their own precise

terms our mistier notions from across the Channel, foretold revolution and

civil war. Every evening the kiosks displayed texts of doom, and, in the

cafés, acquaintances greeted one half-derisively with: “Ha, my friend, you

are better off here than at home, are you not?” until I and several friends in

circumstances like my own came seriously to believe that our country was

in danger and that our duty lay there. We were joined by a Belgian Futurist,

who lived under the, I think, assumed name of Jean de Brissac la Motte, and

claimed the right to bear arms in any battle anywhere against the lower

classes.

这是巴黎的话题。法国人一如既往地对他们昔日朋友的不满而欣喜

若狂，并将我们从海峡对岸传来的更模糊的观念转化为他们自己的确

切术语，预言了革命和内战。每天傍晚，售货亭里都会张贴着厄运的

文字，在咖啡馆里，熟人半嘲讽地问候：“哈，我的朋友，你在这里比

在家里好，不是吗？”直到我和几个朋友在和我一样的情况下认真地相

信我们的国家处于危险之中，我们的责任就在那里。一位比利时未来

主义者也加入了我们的行列，我想，他住在让·德·布里萨克·拉莫特

（Jean de Brissac la Motte）的假名下，并声称有权在任何地方与下层

阶级进行任何战斗中携带武器。

We crossed together, in a high-spirited, male party, expecting to find

unfolding before us at Dover the history so often repeated of late, with so

few variations, from all parts of Europe, that I, at any rate, had formed in

my mind a clear, composite picture of “Revolution”—the red flag on the

post office, the overturned tram, the drunken N.C.O.s, the jail open and

gangs of released criminals prowling the streets, the train from the capital

that did not arrive. One had read it in the papers, seen it in the films, heard

it at café tables again and again for six or seven years now, till it had

become part of one’s experience, at second hand, like the mud of Flanders

and the flies of Mesopotamia.

我们一起穿越，在一个意气风发的男性聚会中，期望在多佛尔发现

最近经常重复的历史在我们面前展开，来自欧洲各地，变化如此之

少，以至于无论如何，我已经在脑海中形成了一幅清晰的、综合的“革

命”图景——邮局上的红旗，翻倒的电车，醉醺醺的NCO，监狱敞

开，被释放的罪犯团伙在街上徘徊，从首都开来的火车没有到达。人

们在报纸上读到过它，在电影中看过它，在咖啡桌上一次又一次地听

到它，已经有六七年了，直到它成为一个人经验的一部分，就像佛兰

德斯的泥土和美索不达米亚的苍蝇一样。

Then we landed and met the old routine of the customs-sheds, the

punctual boat-train, the porters lining the platform at Victoria and

converging on the first-class carriages; the long line of waiting taxis.

然后我们降落了，遇到了海关棚子、准时的船火车、在维多利亚站

台排成一排的搬运工和聚集在头等车厢的旧例行公事;排着长队的出租

车。

“We’ll separate,” we said, “and see what’s happening. We’ll meet and

compare notes at dinner,” but we knew already in our hearts that nothing

was happening; nothing, at any rate, which needed our presence.

“我们会分开，”我们说，“看看发生了什么。我们会在晚餐时见面

并比较笔记，“但我们心里已经知道什么都没发生;无论如何，没有什

么需要我们的存在。

“Oh dear,” said my father, meeting me by chance on the stairs, “how

delightful to see you again so soon.” (I had been abroad fifteen months.)

“You’ve come at a very awkward time, you know. They’re having another

of those strikes in two days—such a lot of nonsense—and I don’t know

when you’ll be able to get away.”

“噢，亲爱的，”我父亲在楼梯上偶然遇见我说，“这么快又见到

你，真是太高兴了。（我在国外待了十五个月。“你知道，你来得非常

尴尬。他们在两天内又要进行一次罢工——这么多废话——我不知道

你什么时候能逃脱。

I thought of the evening I was forgoing, with the lights coming out along

the banks of the Seine, and the company I should have had there—for I was

at the time concerned with two emancipated American girls who shared a

garçonnière in Auteuil—and wished I had not come.

我想起了我即将离开的那个夜晚，塞纳河岸边的灯光熄灭了，我本

来应该在那里陪伴的——因为当时我关心的是两个解放的美国女孩，

她们在奥特伊（Auteuil）共用一个garçonnière——并希望我没有来。

We dined that night at the Café Royal. There things were a little more

warlike, for the Café was full of undergraduates who had come down for

“National Service.” One group, from Cambridge, had that afternoon signed

on to run messages for Transport House, and their table backed on another

group’s, who were enrolled as special constables. Now and then one or

other party would shout provocatively over the shoulder, but it is hard to

come into serious conflict back to back, and the affair ended with their

giving each other tall glasses of lager beer.

那天晚上我们在皇家咖啡馆吃饭。那里的情况有点好战，因为咖啡

馆里挤满了来服兵役的本科生。当天下午，来自剑桥的一个小组签了

名，为运输大楼发送消息，他们的桌子背靠另一个小组，他们被登记

为特别警员。时不时地，一方或另一方会挑衅性地在肩膀上大喊大

叫，但很难背靠背发生严重的冲突，婚外情以他们互相赠送高杯拉格

啤酒而告终。

“You should have been in Budapest when Horthy marched in,” said

Jean. “That was politics.”

“当霍西进军时，你应该在布达佩斯，”吉恩说。“那是政治。”

A party was being given that night in Regent’s Park for the ‘Black

Birds’ who had newly arrived in England. One of us had been asked and

thither we all went.

那天晚上，在摄政公园为刚到英国的“黑鸟”举办了一场派对。我们

中的一个人被问到，然后我们都去了。

To us, who frequented Bricktop’s and the Bal Nègre in the Rue Blomet,

there was nothing particularly remarkable in the spectacle; I was scarcely

inside the door when I heard an unmistakable voice, an echo from what

now seemed a distant past.

对于经常光顾 Bricktop's 和 Rue Blomet 的 Bal Nègre 的我们来说，

这场奇观没有什么特别引人注目的;我刚进门，就听到一个明确无误的

声音，那是来自现在看来遥远的过去的回声。

“No,” it said, “they are not animals in a zoo, Mulcaster, to be goggled

at. They are artists, my dear, very great artists, to be revered.”

“不，”它说，“它们不是动物园里的动物，Mulcaster，可以戴上护

目镜。他们是艺术家，我亲爱的，非常伟大的艺术家，值得尊敬。

Anthony Blanche and Boy Mulcaster were at the table where the wine

stood.

安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）和男孩·穆尔卡斯特（Boy

Mulcaster）在葡萄酒所在的桌子旁。

“Thank God here’s someone I know,” said Mulcaster, as I joined them.

“Girl brought me. Can’t see her anywhere.”

“谢天谢地，这是我认识的人，”马尔卡斯特说，我加入了他们。

“女孩带我来了。在任何地方都看不到她。

“She’s given you the slip, my dear, and do you know why? Because you

look ridiculously out of place, Mulcaster. It isn’t your kind of party at all;

you ought not to be here; you ought to go away, you know, to the Old

Hundredth or some lugubrious dance in Belgrave Square.”

“她把纸条给了你，亲爱的，你知道为什么吗？因为你看起来格格

不入，Mulcaster。这根本不是你的那种派对;你不应该在这里;你知

道，你应该去老百日，或者去贝尔格雷夫广场上跳舞。

“Just come from one,” said Mulcaster. “Too early for the Old Hundredth.

I’ll stay on a bit. Things may cheer up.”

“就来自一个，”Mulcaster说。“对于老百人来说还为时过早。我会

停留一会儿。事情可能会好起来。

“I spit on you,” said Anthony. “Let me talk to you, Charles.”

“我向你吐口水，”安东尼说。“让我和你谈谈，查尔斯。”

We took a bottle and our glasses and found a corner in another room. At

our feet five members of the “Black Birds” orchestra squatted on their heels

and threw dice.

我们拿了一个瓶子和眼镜，在另一个房间里找到了一个角落。在我

们的脚下，“黑鸟”管弦乐队的五名成员蹲在他们的脚后跟上，掷骰

子。

“That one,” said Anthony, “the rather pale one, my dear, conked Mrs.

Arnold Frickheimer the other morning on the nut, my dear, with a bottle of

milk.”

“那个，”安东尼说，“那个脸色苍白的，亲爱的，前几天早上用一

瓶牛奶把阿诺德·弗里克海默太太的坚果逗死了。

Almost immediately, inevitably, we began to talk of Sebastian.

几乎立即，不可避免地，我们开始谈论塞巴斯蒂安。

“My dear, he’s such a sot. He came to live with me in Marseille last year

when you threw him over, and really it was as much as I could stand. Sip,

sip, sip like a dowager all day long. And so sly. I was always missing little

things, my dear, things I rather liked; once I lost two suits that had arrived

from Lesley and Roberts that morning. Of course, I didn’t know it was

Sebastian—there were some rather queer fish, my dear, in and out of my

little apartment. Who knows better than you my taste for queer fish? Well,

eventually, my dear, we found the pawnshop where Sebastian was p-p-

popping them and then he hadn’t got the tickets; there was a market for

them, too, at the bistro.

“亲爱的，他真是个傻瓜。去年，当你把他扔过来时，他来到马赛

和我一起生活，这真的是我能忍受的。整天像太后一样啜饮，啜饮，

啜饮。太狡猾了。我总是想念一些小东西，亲爱的，我比较喜欢的东

西;有一次，我丢失了那天早上从莱斯利和罗伯茨那里寄来的两套西

装。当然，我不知道那是塞巴斯蒂安——亲爱的，有一些相当奇怪的

鱼进出我的小公寓。谁比你更了解我对酷儿鱼的口味？好吧，最终，

亲爱的，我们找到了塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）的当铺，然后他没有拿

到票;在小酒馆里，他们也有市场。

“I can see that puritanical, disapproving look in your eye, dear Charles,

as though you thought I had led the boy on. It’s one of Sebastian’s less

lovable qualities that he always gives the impression of being l-l-led on—

like a little horse at a circus. But I assure you I did everything. I said to him

again and again, ‘Why drink? If you want to be intoxicated there are so

many much more delicious things.’ I took him to quite the best man; well,

you know him as well as I do, Nada Alopov and Jean Luxmore and

everyone we know has been to him for years—he’s always in the Regina

Bar—and then we had trouble over that because Sebastian gave him a bad

check—a s-s-stumer, my dear—and a whole lot of very menacing men

came round to the flat—thugs, my dear—and Sebastian was making no

sense at the time and it was all most unpleasant.”

“我能看到你眼中那种清教徒式的、不赞成的眼神，亲爱的查尔

斯，好像你认为是我把那个孩子带走了。这是塞巴斯蒂安不那么讨人

喜欢的品质之一，他总是给人一种被 l-l 领导的印象——就像马戏团里

的一匹小马。但我向你保证，我做了一切。我一遍又一遍地对他

说，'为什么要喝酒？如果你想陶醉，还有很多好吃的东西。我带他去

见了最好的男人;好吧，你和我一样了解他，纳达·阿洛波夫和让·卢克

斯莫尔，以及我们认识的每个人都和他在一起很多年了——他总是在

里贾纳酒吧——然后我们为此遇到了麻烦，因为塞巴斯蒂安给了他一

张空头支票——一个 s-s-stumer，亲爱的——一大堆非常凶恶的人来到

公寓里——暴徒，我的挚爱——塞巴斯蒂安当时说得毫无意义，这一

切都是最不愉快的。

Boy Mulcaster wandered towards us and sat down, without

encouragement, by my side.

男孩穆尔卡斯特徘徊着向我们走来，在我身边坐下，没有鼓励。

“Drink running short in there,” he said, helping himself from our bottle

and emptying it. “Not a soul in the place I ever set eyes on before—all

black fellows.”

“那里的饮料快用完了，”他说，从我们的瓶子里扶起自己，把它倒

空。“在我以前见过的地方，没有一个灵魂——全是黑人。”

Anthony ignored him and continued: “So then we left Marseille and

went to Tangier, and there, my dear, Sebastian took up with his new friend.

How can I describe him? He is like the footman in Warning Shadows—a

great clod of a German who’d been in the Foreign Legion. He got out by

shooting off his great toe. It hadn’t healed yet. Sebastian found him,

starving as tout to one of the houses in the Kasbah, and brought him to stay

with us. It was too macabre. So back I came, my dear, to good old England

—Good old England,” he repeated, embracing with a flourish of his hand

the Negroes gambling at our feet, Mulcaster staring blankly before him, and

our hostess who, in pajamas, now introduced herself to us.

安东尼没有理会他，继续说道：“然后我们离开了马赛，去了丹吉

尔，在那里，亲爱的，塞巴斯蒂安和他的新朋友在一起了。我该如何

形容他？他就像《警告阴影》中的步兵——一个曾在外籍军团服役的

德国人的大块头。他射掉了他的大脚趾。它还没有痊愈。塞巴斯蒂安

找到了他，他饿着肚子在古堡的一所房子里，把他带到我们这里。这

太可怕了。于是，我又回来了，亲爱的，回到了古老的英格兰——古

老的英格兰，“他重复了一遍，用他的手拥抱了在我们脚下赌博的黑

人，穆尔卡斯特茫然地盯着他，还有我们的女主人，她穿着睡衣，现

在向我们介绍了自己。

“Never seen you before,” she said. “Never asked you. Who are all this

white trash, anyway? Seems to me I must be in the wrong house.”

“以前从未见过你，”她说。“从来没问过你。这些白色垃圾到底是

谁？在我看来，我一定是进错了房子。

“A time of national emergency,” said Mulcaster. “Anything may

happen.”

“国家紧急状态，”马尔卡斯特说。“任何事情都可能发生。”

“Is the party going well?” she asked anxiously. “D’you think Florence

Mills would sing? We’ve met before,” she added to Anthony.

“派对进行得顺利吗？”她焦急地问。“你认为弗洛伦斯·米尔斯会唱

歌吗？我们以前见过面，“她向安东尼补充道。

“Often, my dear, but you never asked me tonight.”

“经常，亲爱的，但你今晚从来没问过我。

“Oh dear, perhaps I don’t like you. I thought I liked everyone.”

“哦，亲爱的，也许我不喜欢你。我以为我喜欢每个人。

“Do you think,” asked Mulcaster, when our hostess had left us, “that it

might be witty to give the fire alarm?”

“你认为，”当我们的女主人离开我们时，穆尔卡斯特问道，“发出

火警警报可能是机智的吗？”

“Yes, Boy, run away and ring it.”

“是的，小子，快跑去敲响它。”

“Might cheer things up, I mean.”

“我是说，可能会让事情振作起来。”

“Exactly.”

“没错。”

So Mulcaster left us in search of the telephone.

于是穆尔卡斯特离开我们去寻找电话。

“I think Sebastian and his lame chum went to French Morocco,”

continued Anthony. “They were in trouble with the Tangier police when I

left them. The Marchioness has been a positive pest ever since I came to

London, trying to make me get into touch with them. What a time that poor

woman’s having! It only shows there’s some justice in life.”

“我认为塞巴斯蒂安和他跛脚的傻瓜去了法属摩洛哥，”安东尼继续

说道。“当我离开他们时，他们与丹吉尔警方有麻烦。自从我来到伦敦

以来，Marchioness一直是一种积极的害虫，试图让我与它们取得联

系。那个可怜的女人过得多么美好啊！它只是表明生活中有一些正

义。

Presently Miss Mills began to sing and everyone, except the crap

players, crowded to the next room.

这时，米尔斯小姐开始唱歌了，除了那些废话玩家之外，所有人都

挤到了隔壁房间。

“That’s my girl,” said Mulcaster. “Over there with that black fellow.

That’s the girl who brought me.”

“那是我的女孩，”穆尔卡斯特说。“那边和那个黑人家伙在一起。

就是那个带我来的女孩。

“She seems to have forgotten you now.”

“她现在好像把你忘了。”

“Yes. I wish I hadn’t come. Let’s go somewhere.”

“是的。我希望我没有来。我们去某个地方吧。

Two fire engines drove up as we left and a host of helmeted figures

joined the throng upstairs.

当我们离开时，两辆消防车开了过来，一群戴着头盔的人加入了楼

上的人群。

“That chap, Blanche,” said Mulcaster, “not a good fellow. I put him in

Mercury once.”

“那家伙，布兰奇，”穆尔卡斯特说，“不是个好人。我曾经把他放

在水星上。

We went to a number of night clubs. In two years Mulcaster seemed to

have attained his simple ambition of being known and liked in such places.

At the last of them he and I were kindled by a great flame of patriotism.

我们去了一些夜总会。在两年的时间里，马尔卡斯特似乎已经实现

了他简单的抱负，即在这些地方被人所熟知和喜爱。在最后，他和我

被爱国主义的火焰点燃了。

“You and I,” he said, “were too young to fight in the war. Other chaps

fought, millions of them dead. Not us. We’ll show them. We’ll show the

dead chaps we can fight, too.”

“你和我，”他说，“太年轻了，不能打仗。其他小伙子也参加了战

斗，数百万人丧生。不是我们。我们会向他们展示。我们也会向死去

的家伙展示我们也能战斗的家伙。

“That’s why I’m here,” I said. “Come from overseas, rallying to old

country in hour of need.”

“这就是我来这里的原因，”我说。“来自海外，在需要的时候团结

起来回到古老的国家。”

“Like Australians.”

“就像澳大利亚人一样。”

“Like the poor dead Australians.”

“就像那些可怜的死去的澳大利亚人一样。”

“What you in?”

“你在干什么？”

“Nothing yet. War not ready.”

“还没有。战争还没有准备好。

“Only one thing to join—Bill Meadows’ show—Defense Corps. All

good chaps. Being fixed in Bratt’s.”

“只有一件事可以加入——比尔·梅多斯的节目——国防军团。都是

好家伙。被固定在布拉特的。

“I’ll join.”

“我会加入的。”

“You remember Bratt’s?”

“你还记得布拉特的吗？”

“No. I’ll join that, too.”

“不。我也会加入其中。

“That’s right. All good chaps like the dead chaps.”

“没错。所有好家伙都像死去的家伙一样。

So I joined Bill Meadows’ show, which was a flying squad, protecting

food deliveries in the poorest parts of London. First I was enrolled in the

Defense Corps, took an oath of loyalty, and was given a helmet and

truncheon; then I was put up for Bratt’s Club and, with a number of other

recruits, elected at a committee meeting specially called for the occasion.

For a week we sat under orders in Bratt’s, and thrice a day we drove out in a

lorry at the head of a convoy of milk vans. We were jeered at and

sometimes pelted with muck, but only once did we go into action.

于是我参加了比尔·梅多斯（Bill Meadows）的节目，这是一个飞行

小队，保护伦敦最贫困地区的食品运送。首先，我加入了国防军，宣

誓效忠，并获得了头盔和警棍;然后我被推荐到布拉特俱乐部，并与其

他一些新兵一起，在专门为此场合召开的委员会会议上当选。一个星

期以来，我们奉命在布拉特（Bratt's）坐着，每天三次，我们开着一

辆卡车，在牛奶车车队的前面。我们被嘲笑，有时被淤泥砸中，但我

们只有一次采取行动。

We were sitting round after luncheon that day when Bill Meadows came

back from the telephone in high spirits.

那天午饭后，我们围坐在一起，比尔·梅多斯（Bill Meadows）兴高

采烈地从电话里回来了。

“Come on,” he said. “There’s a perfectly good battle in the Commercial

Road.”

“来吧，”他说。“在商业路上有一场非常精彩的战斗。”

We drove at great speed and arrived to find a steel hawser stretched

between lamp posts, an overturned truck and a policeman, alone on the

pavement, being kicked by half a dozen youths. On either side of this center

of disturbance, and at a little distance from it, two opposing parties had

formed. Near us, as we disembarked, a second policeman was sitting on the

pavement, dazed, with his head in his hands and blood running through his

fingers; two or three sympathizers were standing over him; on the other side

of the hawser was a hostile knot of young dockers. We charged in

cheerfully, relieved the policeman, and were just falling upon the main body

of the enemy when we came into collision with a party of local clergy and

town councilors who arrived simultaneously by another route to try

persuasion. They were our only victims, for just as they went down there

was a cry of “Look out. The coppers,” and a lorry-load of police drew up in

our rear.

我们开着极快的车，到达时发现一个钢制的吊带在灯柱之间伸展，

一辆翻倒的卡车和一名警察独自在人行道上，被六名年轻人踢了一

脚。在这个骚乱中心的两侧，在离它不远的地方，已经形成了两个对

立的政党。在我们附近，当我们下车时，第二名警察坐在人行道上，

头晕目眩，双手抱着头，鲜血流过手指;有两三个同情者站在他身边;

在Hawser的另一边是一群年轻的码头工人。我们兴高采烈地冲了进

去，解救了警察，就在敌人的主体上时，我们遇到了一队当地神职人

员和镇议员，他们同时从另一条路线赶来试图说服。他们是我们唯一

的受害者，因为就在他们下山的时候，有人喊道：“小心。铜，“一卡

车的警察在我们的后方停了下来。

The crowd broke and disappeared. We picked up the peacemakers (only

one of whom was seriously hurt), patrolled some of the side streets looking

for trouble and finding none, and at length returned to Bratt’s. Next day the

General Strike was called off and the country everywhere, except in the

coal fields, returned to normal. It was as though a beast long fabled for its

ferocity had emerged for an hour, scented danger, and slunk back to its lair.

It had not been worth leaving Paris.

人群散开了，消失了。我们接走了和事佬（其中只有一人受了重

伤），在一些小街上巡逻，寻找麻烦，但一无所获，最后回到了布拉

特家。第二天，总罢工被取消，除煤田外，全国各地都恢复了正常。

就好像一头传说中凶猛已久的野兽出现了一个小时，嗅到了危险的味

道，然后溜回了它的巢穴。离开巴黎是不值得的。

Jean, who joined another company, had a pot of ferns dropped on his

head by an elderly widow in Camden Town and was in hospital for a week.

吉恩加入了另一家公司，在卡姆登镇，一位年迈的寡妇把一盆蕨类

植物掉在了他的头上，在医院住了一个星期。

It was through my membership of Bill Meadows’ squad that Julia learned I

was in England. She telephoned to say her mother was anxious to see me.

正是通过我加入比尔·梅多斯（Bill Meadows）的球队，朱莉娅才知道

我在英格兰。她打电话说她妈妈很想见我。

“You’ll find her terribly ill,” she said.

“你会发现她病得很厉害，”她说。

I went to Marchmain House on the first morning of peace. Sir Adrian

Porson passed me in the hall, leaving, as I arrived; he held a bandanna

handkerchief to his face and felt blindly for his hat and stick; he was in

tears.

我在和平的第一天早上去了马奇曼之家。阿德里安·波尔森爵士

（Sir Adrian Porson）在大厅里从我身边经过，在我到达时离开了。他

把一块头巾手帕捂在脸上，盲目地摸着他的帽子和棍子;他泪流满面。

I was shown into the library and in less than a minute Julia joined me.

She shook hands with a gentleness and gravity that were unfamiliar; in the

gloom of that room she seemed a ghost.

我被带进了图书馆，不到一分钟，朱莉娅就加入了我。她用一种陌

生的温柔和严肃握手;在那个房间的黑暗中，她似乎是一个幽灵。

“It’s sweet of you to come. Mummy has kept asking for you, but I don’t

know if she’ll be able to see you now, after all. She’s just said ‘good-bye’ to

Adrian Porson and it’s tired her.”

“你来真是太好了。妈妈一直在找你，但我不知道她现在能不能见

到你。她刚刚和阿德里安·波尔森说了'再见'，这让她很累。

“Good-bye?”

“再见？”

“Yes. She’s dying. She may live a week or two or she may go at any

minute. She’s so weak. I’ll go and ask nurse.”

“是的。她快死了。她可能活一两个星期，也可能随时离开。她太

虚弱了。我去问护士。

The stillness of death seemed in the house already. No one ever sat in

the library at Marchmain House. It was the one ugly room in either of their

houses. The bookcases of Victorian oak held volumes of Hansard and

obsolete encyclopedias that were never opened; the bare mahogany table

seemed set for the meeting of a committee; the place had the air of being

both public and unfrequented; outside lay the forecourt, the railings, the

quiet cul-de-sac.

死亡的寂静似乎已经在房子里了。从来没有人坐在马奇曼大厦的图

书馆里。这是他们两所房子里唯一一个丑陋的房间。维多利亚时代的

橡木书柜里摆放着大量从未打开过的汉萨德和过时的百科全书;光秃秃

的红木桌子似乎是为委员会会议准备的;这个地方既有公共气息，又有

不常光顾的气息;外面是前院，栏杆，安静的死胡同。

Presently Julia returned.

这时，茱莉亚回来了。

“No, I’m afraid you can’t see her. She’s asleep. She may lie like that for

hours; I can tell you what she wanted. Let’s go somewhere else. I hate this

room.”

“不，恐怕你看不见她。她睡着了。她可能会这样躺几个小时;我可

以告诉你她想要什么。我们去别的地方吧。我讨厌这个房间。

We went across the hall to the small drawing-room where luncheon

parties used to assemble, and sat on either side of the fireplace. Julia

seemed to reflect the crimson and gold of the walls and lose some of her

warmness.

我们穿过大厅来到小客厅，那里曾经举行午餐会，坐在壁炉的两

边。茱莉亚似乎反射了墙壁的深红色和金色，失去了一些温暖。

“First, I know, mummy wanted to say how sorry she is she was so

beastly to you last time you met. She’s spoken of it often. She knows now

she was wrong about you. I’m quite sure you understood and put it out of

your mind immediately, but it’s the kind of thing mummy can never forgive

herself—it’s the kind of thing she so seldom did.”

“首先，我知道，妈妈想说她有多抱歉，上次你见面时她对你太兽

了。她经常提到它。她现在知道她错了。我很确定你明白了，并立即

把它从你的脑海中抛开，但这是妈妈永远无法原谅自己的事情——这

是她很少做的事情。

“Do tell her I understood completely.”

“告诉她我完全明白了。”

“The other thing, of course, you have guessed—Sebastian. She wants

him. I don’t know if that’s possible. Is it?”

“当然，另一件事你已经猜到了——塞巴斯蒂安。她想要他。我不

知道这是否可能。是吗？

“I hear he’s in a very bad way.”

“我听说他的情况很糟糕。”

“We heard that, too. We cabled to the last address we had, but there was

no answer. There still may be time for him to see her. I thought of you as

the only hope, as soon as I heard you were in England. Will you try and get

him? It’s an awful lot to ask, but I think Sebastian would want it, too, if he

realized.”

“我们也听到了。我们用电报打到了我们得到的最后一个地址，但

没有答案。他可能还有时间去看她。我一听说你在英国，就把你当成

唯一的希望。你会试着去找他吗？这是一个可怕的问题，但我认为塞

巴斯蒂安也会想要它，如果他意识到的话。

“I’ll try.”

“我会努力的。”

“There’s no one else we can ask. Rex is so busy.”

“我们没有其他人可以问。雷克斯太忙了。

“Yes. I heard reports of all he’s been doing organizing the gas works.”

“是的。我听说他一直在组织煤气厂。

“Oh yes,” Julia said with a touch of her old dryness. “He’s made a lot of

kudos out of the strike.”

“哦，是的，”茱莉亚带着一丝她以前的干涩说。“他从罢工中获得

了很多荣誉。

Then we talked for a few minutes about the Bratt’s squad. She told me

Brideshead had refused to take any public service because he was not

satisfied with the justice of the cause; Cordelia was in London, in bed now,

as she had been watching by her mother all night. I told her I had taken up

architectural painting and that I enjoyed it. All this talk was nothing; we had

said all we had to say in the first two minutes; I stayed for tea and then left

her.

然后我们聊了几分钟关于布拉特的小队。她告诉我，布里德斯黑德

拒绝接受任何公共服务，因为他对事业的正义性不满意;科黛莉亚在伦

敦，现在躺在床上，因为她整晚都在母亲身边看着她。我告诉她我已

经开始学习建筑绘画，而且我很喜欢它。所有这些谈话都算不上什么;

我们在前两分钟说了我们要说的一切;我留下来喝茶，然后离开了她。

Air France ran a service of a kind to Casablanca; there I took the bus to Fez,

starting at dawn and arriving in the new town at evening. I telephoned from

the hotel to the British Consul and dined with him that evening, in his

charming house by the walls of the old town. He was a kind, serious man.

法航开通了飞往卡萨布兰卡的航班;在那里，我乘坐公共汽车前往非

斯，黎明时分出发，傍晚到达新城。那天晚上，我从旅馆给英国领事

打了电话，和他一起吃饭，在他老城墙边的迷人房子里。他是一个善

良、认真的人。

“I’m delighted someone has come to look after young Flyte at last,” he

said. “He’s been something of a thorn in our sides here. This is no place for

a remittance man. The French don’t understand him at all. They think

everyone who’s not engaged in trade is a spy. It’s not as though he lived like

a Milord. Things aren’t easy here. There’s war going on not thirty miles

from this house, though you might not think it. We had some young fools

on bicycles only last week who’d come to volunteer for Abdul Krim’s army.

“我很高兴终于有人来照顾年轻的弗莱特，”他说。“他一直是我们

这边的眼中钉。这不是汇款人的地方。法国人根本不了解他。他们认

为每个不从事贸易的人都是间谍。这并不是说他活得像个米洛德。这

里的事情并不容易。离这所房子不到三十英里的地方正在发生战争，

尽管你可能没有想到。就在上周，我们有一些骑自行车的年轻傻瓜，

他们自愿加入阿卜杜勒·克里姆的军队。

“Then the Moors are a tricky lot; they don’t hold with drink and our

young friend, as you may know, spends most of his day drinking. What

does he want to come here for? There’s plenty of room for him at Rabat or

Tangier, where they cater for tourists. He’s taken a house in the native town,

you know. I tried to stop him, but he got it from a Frenchman in the

Department of Arts. I don’t say there’s any harm in him, but he’s an anxiety.

There’s an awful fellow sponging on him—a German out of the Foreign

Legion. A thoroughly bad hat by all accounts. There’s bound to be trouble.

“那么摩尔人是一个棘手的群体;他们不喝酒，我们的年轻朋友，你

可能知道，他一天中的大部分时间都在喝酒。他想来这里干什么？在

拉巴特或丹吉尔，他有足够的空间，在那里他们迎合游客。他在家乡

买了一栋房子，你知道的。我试图阻止他，但他是从艺术系的一个法

国人那里得到的。我不是说他有什么坏处，但他很焦虑。有一个可怕

的家伙在他身上嬉戏——一个从外籍军团出来的德国人。从各方面来

看，这是一顶彻头彻尾的坏帽子。肯定会有麻烦。

“Mind you, I like Flyte. I don’t see much of him. He used to come here

for baths until he got fixed up at his house. He was always perfectly

charming, and my wife took a great fancy to him. What he needs is

occupation.”

“请注意，我喜欢Flyte。我没怎么见到他。他过去常常来这里洗

澡，直到他在家里修好。他总是非常有魅力，我的妻子非常喜欢他。

他需要的是职业。

I explained my errand.

我解释了我的差事。

“You’ll probably find him at home now. Goodness knows there’s

nowhere to go in the evenings in the old town. If you like I’ll send the

porter to show you the way.”

“你现在可能会在家里找到他。天知道晚上在老城区无处可去。如

果你愿意，我会派门房给你带路。

So I set out after dinner, with the consular porter going ahead lantern in

hand. Morocco was a new and strange country to me. Driving that day, mile

after mile, up the smooth, strategic road, past the vineyards and military

posts and the new, white settlements and the early crops already standing

high in the vast, open fields, and the hoardings advertising the staples of

France—Dubonnet, Michelin, Magasin du Louvre—I had thought it all very

suburban and up-to-date; now, under the stars, in the walled city, whose

streets were gentle, dusty stairways, and whose walls rose windowless on

either side, closed overhead, then opened again to the stars; where the dust

lay thick among the smooth paving stones and figures passed silently, robed

in white, on soft slippers or hard, bare soles; where the air was scented with

cloves and incense and wood smoke—now I knew what had drawn

Sebastian here and held him so long.

于是我吃完晚饭就出发了，领事门房手里拿着灯笼走在前面。摩洛

哥对我来说是一个陌生的新国家。那天，我开车，一英里又一英里，

沿着平坦的、战略性的公路行驶，经过葡萄园和军事哨所，新的白人

定居点和早熟的庄稼已经高高地矗立在广阔的开阔田野上，以及为法

国主食——杜邦、米其林、卢浮宫——做广告的囤积物——我以为这

一切都非常郊区和最新;现在，在星空下，在城墙里，它的街道是平缓

的、尘土飞扬的楼梯，两边的墙壁没有窗户，在头顶上关闭，然后又

向星星敞开;光滑的铺路石上尘土飞扬，身影静静地走过，穿着白色的

长袍，穿着柔软的拖鞋或坚硬的裸露鞋底;空气中弥漫着丁香、熏香和

木烟的香味——现在我知道是什么把塞巴斯蒂安吸引到这里来了，并

把他抱了这么久。

The consular porter strode arrogantly ahead with his light swinging and

his tall cane banging; sometimes an open doorway revealed a silent group

seated in golden lamplight round a brazier.

领事门房傲慢地大步向前走，他的灯摆动着，高高的手杖敲打着;

有时，一扇敞开的门口露出一群沉默的人，他们坐在火盆旁的金色灯

光下。

“Very dirty peoples,” the porter said scornfully, over his shoulder. “No

education. French leave them dirty. Not like British peoples. My peoples,”

he said, “always very British peoples.”

“非常肮脏的人，”门房轻蔑地说，在他的肩膀上。“没有受过教

育。法国人让他们肮脏。不像英国人。我的人民，“他说，”总是非常

英国的人民。

For he was from the Sudan Police, and regarded this ancient center of

his culture as a New Zealander might regard Rome.

因为他来自苏丹警察局，他把这个古老的文化中心看作是新西兰人

对罗马的看法。

At length we came to the last of many studded doors, and the porter beat

on it with his stick.

最后，我们来到了许多镶钉门的最后一扇，门房用棍子敲打着它。

“British Lord’s house,” he said.

“英国勋爵的房子，”他说。

Lamplight and a dark face appeared at the grating. The consular porter

spoke peremptorily; bolts were withdrawn and we entered a small courtyard

with a well in its center and a vine trained overhead.

灯光和一张漆黑的脸出现在光栅上。领事门房断然说话;螺栓被撤

下，我们进入了一个小院子，院子中央有一口井，头顶上有一根藤

蔓。

“I wait here,” said the porter. “You go with this native fellow.”

“我在这里等着，”门房说。“你和这个土生土长的家伙一起去。”

I entered the house, down a step and into the living-room. I found a

gramophone, an oil-stove and, between them, a young man. Later, when I

looked about me, I noticed other, more agreeable things—the rugs on the

floor, the embroidered silk on the walls, the carved and painted beams of

the ceiling, the heavy, pierced lamp that hung from a chain and cast soft

shadows of its own tracery about the room. But on first entering these three

things, the gramophone for its noise—it was playing a French record of a

jazz band—the stove for its smell, and the young man for his wolfish look,

struck my senses. He was lolling in a basket chair, with a bandaged foot

stuck forward on a box; he was dressed in a kind of thin, mid-European

imitation tweed with a tennis shirt open at the neck; the unwounded foot

wore a brown canvas shoe. There was a brass tray by his side on wooden

legs, and on it were two beer bottles, a dirty plate and a saucer full of

cigarette ends; he held a glass of beer in his hand and a cigarette lay on his

lower lip and stuck there when he spoke. He had long fair hair combed back

without a parting and a face that was unnaturally lined for a man of his

obvious youth; one of his front teeth was missing, so that his sibilants came

sometimes with a lisp, sometimes with a disconcerting whistle, which he

covered with a giggle; the teeth he had were stained with tobacco and set

far apart.

我进了屋子，走下台阶，走进客厅。我找到了一台留声机，一个油

炉，在它们之间，还有一个年轻人。后来，当我环顾四周时，我注意

到了其他更令人愉快的东西——地板上的地毯，墙上的刺绣丝绸，天

花板上雕刻和彩绘的横梁，挂在链子上的沉重的穿孔灯，在房间里投

下柔和的阴影。但是，当我第一次进入这三样东西时，留声机的噪音

——它正在播放爵士乐队的法国唱片——炉子的气味，以及那个年轻

人狼狈的样子，都打动了我的感官。他懒洋洋地躺在篮椅上，一只缠

着绷带的脚向前卡在一个箱子上;他穿着一种薄薄的中欧仿花呢，领口

敞开着网球衫;未受伤的脚穿着棕色帆布鞋。他身边有一个木腿上的黄

铜托盘，上面放着两个啤酒瓶，一个脏盘子和一个装满烟头的碟子;他

手里拿着一杯啤酒，下唇上放着一根烟，说话时一直插在那里。他有

一头金色的长发，没有分开，一张脸对于一个明显年轻的男人来说不

自然地皱纹;他的一颗门牙不见了，所以他的嘶嘶声有时口齿不清，有

时伴着令人不安的口哨声，他用咯咯的笑声掩盖了它;他的牙齿沾满了

烟草，而且相距很远。

This was plainly the ‘thoroughly bad hat’ of the consul’s description, the

film footman of Anthony’s.

这显然是领事描述的“彻头彻尾的坏帽子”，安东尼的电影脚夫。

“I’m looking for Sebastian Flyte. This is his house, is it not?” I spoke

loudly to make myself heard above the dance music, but he answered softly

in English fluent enough to suggest that it was now habitual to him.

“我正在寻找塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特。这是他的房子，不是吗？我大声

说话，让自己在舞曲之上听到，但他用流利的英语轻声回答，表明他

现在已经习惯了。

“Yeth. But he isn’t here. There’s no one but me.”

“是的。但他不在这里。除了我，没有其他人。

“I’ve come from England to see him on important business. Can you tell

me where I can find him?”

“我从英国来见他，有重要的公务。你能告诉我在哪里可以找到他

吗？

The record came to its end. The German turned it over, wound up the

machine, and started it playing again before answering.

记录结束了。德国人把它翻过来，给机器上发条，在回答之前再次

开始播放。

“Sebastian’s sick. The brothers took him away to the Infirmary. Maybe

they’ll let you thee him, maybe not. I got to go there myself one day thoon

to have my foot dressed. I’ll ask them then. When he’s better they’ll let you

thee him, maybe.”

“塞巴斯蒂安病了。弟兄们把他带到医务室。也许他们会让你他，

也许不会。有一天，我必须亲自去那里穿脚。那我就问问他们。等他

好起来了，他们会让你去找他，也许吧。

There was another chair and I sat down on it. Seeing that I meant to stay,

the German offered me some beer.

还有一把椅子，我坐在上面。德国人见我打算留下来，就给了我一

些啤酒。

“You’re not Thebastian’s brother?” he said. “Cousin maybe? Maybe you

married hith thister?”

“你不是塞巴斯蒂安的兄弟吗？”他说。“也许是表哥？也许你嫁给

了这个人？

“I’m only a friend. We were at the university together.”

“我只是一个朋友。我们一起上大学。

“I had a friend at the university. We studied History. My friend was

cleverer than me; a little weak fellow—I used to pick him up and shake him

when I was angry—but tho clever. Then one day we said: “What the hell?

There is no work in Germany. Germany is down the drain,” so we said

good-bye to our professors, and they said: “Yes, Germany is down the

drain. There is nothing for a student to do here now,” and we went away

and walked and walked and at last we came here. Then we said, “There is

no army in Germany now, but we must be tholdiers,” so we joined the

Legion. My friend died of dysentery last year, campaigning in the Atlas.

When he was dead, I said, “What the hell?” so I shot my foot. It is now full

of pus, though I have done it one year.”

“我在大学里有一个朋友。我们学的是历史。我的朋友比我聪明;一

个有点软弱的家伙——我生气的时候常常把他抱起来摇晃——但很聪

明。然后有一天我们说：“这到底是怎么回事？德国没有工作。德国正

在下水道，“所以我们和我们的教授说再见，他们说：”是的，德国正

在下水道。现在学生在这里无事可做，“我们走开了，走了又走，最后

我们来到了这里。然后我们说，“德国现在没有军队，但我们必须成为

军官”，所以我们加入了军团。我的朋友去年死于痢疾，在阿特拉斯竞

选。当他死了，我说，“这到底是怎么回事？”于是我开枪打死了我的

脚。它现在充满了脓液，尽管我已经做了一年。

“Yes,” I said. “That’s very interesting. But my immediate concern is

with Sebastian. Perhaps you would tell me about him.”

“是的，”我说。“这很有趣。但我最关心的是塞巴斯蒂安。也许你

会告诉我关于他的事情。

“He is a very good fellow, Sebastian. He is all right for me. Tangier was

a stinking place. He brought me here—nice house, nice food, nice servant

—everything is all right for me here, I reckon. I like it all right.”

“他是一个非常好的人，塞巴斯蒂安。他对我很好。丹吉尔是一个

臭气熏天的地方。他把我带到这里来——漂亮的房子，美味的食物，

漂亮的仆人——我想，这里对我来说一切都很好。我喜欢它。

“His mother is very ill,” I said. “I have come to tell him.”

“他妈妈病得很重，”我说。“我是来告诉他的。”

“She rich?”

“她有钱？”

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Why don’t she give him more money? Then we could live at

Casablanca, maybe, in a nice flat. You know her well? You could make her

give him more money?”

“她为什么不给他更多的钱？然后我们可以住在卡萨布兰卡，也

许，在一个漂亮的公寓里。你很了解她吗？你能让她给他更多的钱

吗？

“What’s the matter with him?”

“他怎么了？”

“I don’t know. I reckon maybe he drink too much. The brothers will

look after him. It’s all right for him there. The brothers are good fellows.

Very cheap there.”

“我不知道。我想也许他喝得太多了。弟兄们会照顾他。那里对他

来说没关系。兄弟俩是好人。那里非常便宜。

He clapped his hands and ordered more beer.

他拍了拍手，点了更多的啤酒。

“You thee? A nice thervant to look after me. It is all right.”

“你？照顾我的好人。没关系。

When I had got the name of the hospital I left.

当我得到医院的名字后，我就离开了。

“Tell Thebastian I am still here and all right. I reckon he’s worrying

about me, maybe.”

“告诉塞巴斯蒂安，我还在这里，没事。我想他是在担心我，也许

吧。

The hospital, where I went next morning, was a collection of bungalows

between the old and the new towns. It was kept by Franciscans. I made my

way through a crowd of diseased Moors to the doctor’s room. He was a

layman, clean shaven, dressed in white, starched overalls. We spoke in

French, and he told me Sebastian was in no danger, but quite unfit to travel.

He had had the grippe, with one lung slightly affected; he was very weak;

he lacked resistance; what could one expect? He was an alcoholic. The

doctor spoke dispassionately, almost brutally, with the relish men of science

sometimes have for limiting themselves to inessentials, for pruning back

their work to the point of sterility; but the bearded, barefooted brother in

whose charge he put me, the man of no scientific pretensions who did the

dirty jobs of the ward, had a different story.

第二天早上我去的医院是新旧城区之间的平房。它由方济各会保存。

我穿过一群生病的摩尔人，来到医生的房间。他是一个外行，剃得干

干净净，穿着白色的上浆工作服。我们用法语交谈，他告诉我塞巴斯

蒂安没有危险，但不适合旅行。他有抓握，一个肺受到轻微影响;他非

常虚弱;他缺乏抵抗力;人们能期待什么？他是个酒鬼。医生冷静地、

近乎残酷地说话，与科学界人士有时津津乐道的，因为他们把自己限

制在无关紧要的事情上，把他们的工作修剪到不育的地步;但是，他把

我交给的那个留着胡子、赤脚的弟兄，一个没有科学自命不凡的人，

在病房里做着肮脏的工作，却有不同的故事。

“He’s so patient. Not like a young man at all. He lies there and never

complains—and there is much to complain of. We have no facilities. The

Government give us what they can spare from the soldiers. And he is so

kind. There is a poor German boy with a foot that will not heal and

secondary syphilis, who comes here for treatment. Lord Flyte found him

starving in Tangier and took him in and gave him a home. A real

Samaritan.”

“他很有耐心。一点也不像一个年轻人。他躺在那里，从不抱怨

——而且有很多抱怨。我们没有设施。政府给了我们他们能从士兵那

里得到的东西。他是如此善良。有一个可怜的德国男孩，他的脚不会

愈合，患有二期梅毒，他来这里接受治疗。弗莱特勋爵发现他在丹吉

尔挨饿，于是收留了他，给了他一个家。一个真正的撒玛利亚人。

“Poor simple monk,” I thought, “poor booby.” God forgive me!

“可怜的单纯僧侣，”我想，“可怜的诱杀。上帝饶恕我！

Sebastian was in the wing kept for Europeans, where the beds were

divided by low partitions into cubicles with some air of privacy. He was

lying with his hands on the quilt staring at the wall, where the only

ornament was a religious oleograph.

塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）在为欧洲人保留的侧翼中，那里的床被低

矮的隔板隔成小隔间，并带有一些隐私的空气。他躺在被子上，盯着

墙，那里唯一的装饰品是宗教油画。

“Your friend,” said the brother.

“你的朋友，”弟兄说。

He looked round slowly.

他慢慢地环顾四周。

“Oh, I thought he meant Kurt. What are you doing here, Charles?”

“哦，我以为他指的是库尔特。你在这里做什么，查尔斯？

He was more than ever emaciated; drink, which made others fat and red,

seemed to wither Sebastian. The brother left us, and I sat by his bed and

talked about his illness.

他比以往任何时候都更加憔悴;喝酒，让别人发胖发红，似乎让塞

巴斯蒂安枯萎了。哥哥离开了我们，我坐在他的床边，谈论他的病

情。

“I was out of my mind for a day or two,” he said. “I kept thinking I was

back in Oxford. You went to my house? Did you like it? Is Kurt still there? I

won’t ask you if you liked Kurt; no one does. It’s funny—I couldn’t get on

without him, you know.”

“我有一两天都疯了，”他说。“我一直以为我回到了牛津。你去我

家了？你喜欢它吗？库尔特还在吗？我不会问你是否喜欢库尔特;没有

人这样做。这很有趣——没有他，我就无法继续下去，你知道的。

Then I told him about his mother. He said nothing for some time, but lay

gazing at the oleograph of the Seven Dolours. Then:

然后我告诉他关于他母亲的事情。他沉默了一会儿，只是静静地盯

着七道尔的油画。然后：

“Poor mummy. She really was a femme fatale, wasn’t she? She killed at

a touch.”

“可怜的木乃伊。她真的是个蛇蝎美人，不是吗？她一碰就死了。

I telegraphed to Julia that Sebastian was unable to travel, and stayed a

week at Fez, visiting the hospital daily until he was well enough to move.

His first sign of returning strength, on the second day of my visit, was to

ask for brandy. By next day he had got some, somehow, and kept it under

the bedclothes.

我给茱莉亚打了电报，说塞巴斯蒂安无法旅行，在菲斯住了一个星

期，每天去医院看病，直到他好到可以动弹为止。在我访问的第二

天，他恢复体力的第一个迹象是要白兰地。到了第二天，他不知怎么

弄到了一些，把它放在被褥下面。

The doctor said: “Your friend is drinking again. It is forbidden here.

What can I do? This is not a reformatory school. I cannot police the wards. I

am here to cure people, not to protect them from vicious habits, or teach

them self-control. Cognac will not hurt him now. It will make him weaker

for the next time he is ill, and then one day some little trouble will carry

him off, pouf. This is not a home for inebriates. He must go at the end of the

week.”

医生说：“你的朋友又喝酒了。这里是禁止的。我能做些什么？这

不是一所感化学校。我不能对病房进行监管。我来这里是为了治病，

不是为了保护他们远离恶习，也不是教他们自制。干邑白兰地现在不

会伤害他了。下次他生病时，这会让他变得更虚弱，然后有一天一些

小麻烦会把他带走，噗噗。这不是醉酒者的家。他必须在周末离开。

The lay-brother said: “Your friend is so much happier today, it is like

one transfigured.”

俗家弟兄说：“你的朋友今天快乐多了，就像一个变了一样。

“Poor simple monk,” I thought, “poor booby”; but he added, “You know

why? He has a bottle of cognac in bed with him. It is the second I have

found. No sooner do I take one away than he gets another. He is so naughty.

It is the Arab boys who fetch it for him. But it is good to see him happy

again when he has been so sad.”

“可怜的单纯僧侣，”我想，“可怜的诱杀”;但他补充说：“你知道为

什么吗？他床上有一瓶干邑白兰地。这是我找到的第二个。我刚拿走

一个，他就会得到另一个。他太淘气了。是阿拉伯男孩为他取来的。

但很高兴看到他在如此悲伤的时候再次快乐。

On my last afternoon I said, “Sebastian, now your mother’s dead”—for

the news had reached us that morning—“do you think of going back to

England?”

在我最后一个下午，我说，“塞巴斯蒂安，现在你母亲死了”——因

为那天早上这个消息已经传到了我们这里——“你想回英国吗？”

“It would be lovely, in some ways,” he said, “but do you think Kurt

would like it?”

“从某种程度上来说，这会很可爱，”他说，“但你认为库尔特会喜

欢它吗？

“For God’s sake,” I said, “you don’t mean to spend your life with Kurt,

do you?”

“看在上帝的份上，”我说，“你不是想和库尔特共度一生吧？”

“I don’t know. He seems to mean to spend it with me. ‘It’th all right for

him, I reckon, maybe,’ ” he said, mimicking Kurt’s accent, and then he

added what, if I had paid more attention, should have given me the key I

lacked; at the time I heard and remembered it, without taking notice. “You

know, Charles,” he said, “it’s rather a pleasant change when all your life

you’ve had people looking after you, to have someone to look after

yourself. Only of course it has to be someone pretty hopeless to need

looking after by me.”

“我不知道。他似乎想和我一起度过。“对他来说没问题，我想，也

许，”他说，模仿库尔特的口音，然后他补充说，如果我多注意一点，

应该给我缺少的钥匙;当时我听到并记住了它，没有注意到。“你知

道，查尔斯，”他说，“当你一生都有人照顾你，有人照顾你自己时，

这是一个相当令人愉快的变化。当然，它必须是一个非常绝望的人，

需要我照顾。

I was able to straighten his money affairs before I left. He had lived till

then by getting into difficulties and then telegraphing for odd sums to his

lawyers. I saw the branch manager of the bank and arranged for him, if

funds were forthcoming from London, to receive Sebastian’s quarterly

allowance and pay him a weekly sum of pocket money with a reserve to be

drawn in emergencies. This sum was only to be given to Sebastian

personally, and only when the manager was satisfied that he had a proper

use for it. Sebastian agreed readily to all this.

在我离开之前，我能够理顺他的钱事。在那之前，他一直生活在困

境中，然后给他的律师打电报索要零星的钱。我见到了银行的分行经

理，并安排他，如果资金来自伦敦，他可以领取塞巴斯蒂安的季度津

贴，并每周付给他一笔零用钱，并在紧急情况下提取储备金。这笔钱

只能交给塞巴斯蒂安个人，而且只有在经理满意他有适当的用途时。

塞巴斯蒂安欣然同意了这一切。

“Otherwise,” he said, “Kurt will get me to sign a check for the whole lot

when I’m tight and then he’ll go off and get into all kinds of trouble.”

“否则，”他说，“库尔特会让我在我紧张的时候签一张支票，然后

他会离开并惹上各种麻烦。

I saw Sebastian home from the hospital. He seemed weaker in his basket

chair than he had been in bed. The two sick men, he and Kurt, sat opposite

one another with the gramophone between them.

我看到塞巴斯蒂安从医院回家。他坐在篮子椅上似乎比躺在床上更

虚弱。他和库尔特这两个病人相对而坐，中间放着留声机。

“It was time you came back,” said Kurt. “I need you.”

“你该回来了，”库尔特说。“我需要你。”

“Do you, Kurt?”

“是吗，Kurt？”

“I reckon so. It’s not so good being alone when you’re sick. That boy’s a

lazy fellow—always slipping off when I want him. Once he stayed out all

night and there was no one to make my coffee when I woke up. It’s no good

having a foot full of pus. Times I can’t sleep good. Maybe another time I

shall slip off, too, and go where I can be looked after.” He clapped his hands

but no servant came. “You see?” he said.

“我想是的。生病时独自一人并不那么好。那个男孩是个懒惰的家

伙——当我想要他的时候，他总是溜走。有一次他整晚都在外面，当

我醒来时没有人给我煮咖啡。脚上满是脓液是不好的。有时我睡不好

觉。也许下次我也会溜走，去可以照顾我的地方。他拍了拍手，但没

有仆人来。“你明白了吗？”他说。

“What d’you want?”

“你想要什么？”

“Cigarettes. I got some in the bag under my bed.”

“香烟。我在床底下的袋子里放了一些。

Sebastian began painfully to rise from his chair.

塞巴斯蒂安痛苦地从椅子上站起来。

“I’ll get them,” I said. “Where’s his bed?”

“我去拿，”我说。“他的床在哪儿？”

“No, that’s my job,” said Sebastian.

“不，那是我的工作，”塞巴斯蒂安说。

“Yeth,” said Kurt, “I reckon that’s Sebastian’s job.”

“是的，”库尔特说，“我想这是塞巴斯蒂安的工作。

So I left him with his friend in the little enclosed house at the end of the

alley. There was nothing more I could do for Sebastian.

于是我把他和他的朋友留在了小巷尽头的封闭小房子里。我无能为

力。

I had meant to return direct to Paris, but this business of Sebastian’s

allowance meant that I must go to London and see Brideshead. I travelled

by sea, taking the P. & O. from Tangier, and was home in early June.

我本来打算直接回巴黎的，但塞巴斯蒂安的津贴意味着我必须去伦

敦看新娘头。我从丹吉尔乘船旅行，在6月初回到了家。

“Do you consider,” asked Brideshead, “that there is anything vicious in my

brother’s connection with this German?”

“你认为，”布里德斯黑德问道，“我哥哥和这个德国人有什么恶毒的关

系吗？”

“No. I’m sure not. It’s simply a case of two waifs coming together.”

“不。我肯定不会。这简直就是两个外界人士走到一起的案例。

“You say he is a criminal?”

“你说他是罪犯？”

“I said “a criminal type”. He’s been in the military prison and was

dishonorably discharged.”

“我说'犯罪类型'。他被关进了军事监狱，被不光彩地解雇了。

“And the doctor says Sebastian is killing himself with drink?”

“医生说塞巴斯蒂安是用酒自杀的？”

“Weakening himself. He hasn’t D.T.s or cirrhosis.”

“削弱自己。他没有D.T.s或肝硬化。

“He’s not insane?”

“他没疯吧？”

“Certainly not. He’s found a companion he happens to like and a place

where he happens to like living.”

“当然不是。他找到了一个他碰巧喜欢的同伴和一个他碰巧喜欢生

活的地方。

“Then he must have his allowance as you suggest. The thing is quite

clear.”

“那么他必须按照你的建议得到他的津贴。事情很清楚。

In some ways Brideshead was an easy man to deal with. He had a kind

of mad certainty about everything which made his decisions swift and easy.

在某些方面，布里德斯黑德是一个容易相处的人。他对每件事都有

一种疯狂的确定性，这使他的决定迅速而容易。

“Would you like to paint this house?” he asked suddenly. “A picture of

the front, another of the back on the park, another of the staircase, another

of the big drawing-room? Four small oils; that is what my father wants done

for a record, to keep at Brideshead. I don’t know any painters. Julia said

you specialized in architecture.”

“你想粉刷这所房子吗？”他突然问道。“一张前面的照片，另一张

公园后面的照片，另一张楼梯的照片，另一张大客厅的照片？四种小

油;这就是我父亲想要做的记录，保留在布里德斯黑德。我不认识任何

画家。茱莉亚说你是专攻建筑的。

“Yes,” I said. “I should like to very much.”

“是的，”我说。“我非常想。”

“You know it’s being pulled down? My father’s selling it. They are

going to put up a block of flats here. They’re keeping the name—we can’t

stop them apparently.”

“你知道它被拉下来了吗？我父亲正在卖掉它。他们将在这里搭建

一栋公寓楼。他们保留了这个名字——我们显然无法阻止他们。

“What a sad thing.”

“多么可悲的事情。”

“Well, I’m sorry of course. But you think it good architecturally?”

“嗯，我当然对不起。但你认为它在建筑上很好吗？

“One of the most beautiful houses I know.”

“我所知道的最漂亮的房子之一。”

“Can’t see it. I’ve always thought it rather ugly. Perhaps your pictures

will make me see it differently.”

“看不见。我一直认为它很丑陋。也许你的照片会让我以不同的方

式看待它。

This was my first commission; I had to work against time, for the

contractors were only waiting for the final signature to start their work of

destruction. In spite, or perhaps, because, of that—for it is my vice to spend

too long on a canvas, never content to leave well alone—those four

paintings are particular favorites of mine, and it was their success, both with

myself and others, that confirmed me in what has since been my career.

这是我的第一个委托;我不得不争分夺秒地工作，因为承包商只是

在等待最后的签名才能开始他们的破坏工作。儘管如此，或許是因為

這樣——因為在畫布上花太長時間是我的錬，從不滿足於獨自留下來

——這四幅畫是我特別喜歡的，正是它們的成功，無論是對我自己還

是其他人，都確認了我從那時起的職業生涯。

I began in the long drawing-room, for they were anxious to shift the

furniture, which had stood there since it was built. It was a long, elaborate,

symmetrical Adam room, with two bays of windows opening into Green

Park. The light, streaming in from the west on the afternoon when I began

to paint there, was fresh green from the young trees outside.

我从长长的客厅开始，因为他们急于搬走家具，这些家具自建成以

来一直立在那里。这是一个长长的、精致的、对称的亚当房间，有两

个窗户通向绿色公园。当我开始在那里作画的下午，光线从西边射进

来，从外面的幼树上射出新鲜的绿色。

I had the perspective set out in pencil and the detail carefully placed. I

held back from painting, like a diver on the water’s edge; once in I found

myself buoyed and exhilarated. I was normally a slow and deliberate

painter; that afternoon and all next day, and the day after, I worked fast. I

could do nothing wrong. At the end of each passage I paused, tense, afraid

to start the next, fearing, like a gambler, that luck must turn and the pile be

lost. Bit by bit, minute by minute, the thing came into being. There were no

difficulties; the intricate multiplicity of light and color became a whole; the

right color was where I wanted it on the palette; each brush stroke, as soon

as it was complete, seemed to have been there always.

我用铅笔画出透视点，并仔细放置细节。我忍住了画画，就像水边

的潜水员;一进去，我发现自己很兴奋，很兴奋。我通常是一个缓慢而

深思熟虑的画家;那天下午和第二天，以及后天，我都工作得很快。我

不能做错任何事。在每一段结束时，我都停顿了一下，紧张，害怕开

始下一个，像赌徒一样担心运气必须转向，失去一堆。一点一点，一

分钟一分钟，事情就应运而生了。没有困难;光线和色彩的错综复杂的

多样性成为一个整体;正确的颜色是我想要的调色板;每一笔，一旦完

成，似乎一直在那里。

Presently on the last afternoon I heard a voice behind me say: “May I

stay here and watch?”

就在最后一个下午，我听到身后有个声音说：“我可以留在这里看

吗？

I turned and found Cordelia.

我转过身，找到了科迪莉亚。

“Yes,” I said, “if you don’t talk,” and I worked on, oblivious of her, until

the failing sun made me put up my brushes.

“是的，”我说，“如果你不说话，”我继续工作，忘记了她，直到太

阳落空使我竖起画笔。

“It must be lovely to be able to do that.”

“能够做到这一点一定很可爱。”

I had forgotten she was there.

我忘了她在那里。

“It is.”

“是的。”

I could not even now leave my picture, although the sun was down and

the room fading to monochrome. I took it from the easel and held it up to

the windows, put it back and lightened a shadow. Then, suddenly weary in

head and eyes and back and arm, I gave it up for the evening and turned to

Cordelia.

我现在甚至无法离开我的照片，尽管太阳已经下山了，房间逐渐变

成了单色。我把它从画架上拿下来，举到窗户上，放回去，照亮了一

个阴影。然后，突然，我的头、眼睛、背部和手臂都感到疲惫，我放

弃了晚上的休息，转向科迪莉亚。

She was now fifteen and had grown tall, nearly to her full height, in the

last eighteen months. She had not the promise of Julia’s full quattrocento

loveliness; there was a touch of Brideshead already in her length of nose

and high cheekbone; she was in black, mourning for her mother.

她现在十五岁，在过去的十八个月里，她已经长高了，几乎达到了

她的身高。她没有茱莉亚完全的quattrocento可爱的承诺;她的鼻子和高

颧骨上已经有一丝新娘头的味道;她穿着黑色的衣服，为她的母亲哀

悼。

“I’m tired,” I said.

“我累了，”我说。

“I bet you are. Is it finished?”

“我敢打赌你是。完了吗？

“Practically. I must go over it again tomorrow.”

“实际上。我明天必须再复习一遍。

“D’you know it’s long past dinner time? There’s no one here to cook

anything now. I only came up today, and didn’t realize how far the decay

had gone. You wouldn’t like to take me out to dinner, would you?”

“你知道早就过了晚餐时间吗？现在这里没有人做饭了。我今天才

上来，没有意识到腐烂已经走了多远。你不想带我出去吃饭吧？

We left by the garden door, into the park, and walked in the twilight to

the Ritz Grill.

我们从花园门口离开，进入公园，在暮色中走到丽兹烧烤店。

“You’ve seen Sebastian? He won’t come home, even now?”

“你见过塞巴斯蒂安吗？他现在还不回家吗？

I did not realize till then that she had understood so much. I said so.

直到那时我才意识到她已经明白了这么多。我是这么说的。

“Well, I love him more than anyone,” she said. “It’s sad about Marchers,

isn’t it? Do you know they’re going to build a block of flats, and that Rex

wanted to take what he called a ‘penthouse’ at the top. Isn’t it like him?

Poor Julia. That was too much for her. He couldn’t understand at all; he

thought she would like to keep up with her old home. Things have all come

to an end very quickly, haven’t they? Apparently papa has been terribly in

debt for a long time. Selling Marchers has put him straight again and saved

I don’t know how much a year in rates. But it seems a shame to pull it

down. Julia says she’d sooner that than to have someone else live there.”

“嗯，我比任何人都爱他，”她说。“游行者很伤心，不是吗？你知

道他们要盖一栋公寓楼吗，雷克斯想把他所谓的“顶层公寓”放在顶

层。不是像他吗？可怜的茱莉亚。这对她来说太过分了。他完全无法

理解;他以为她想跟上她的老家。事情很快就结束了，不是吗？显然，

爸爸已经负债累累了很长时间。卖掉 Marchers 让他再次站直了身子，

并节省了我不知道一年多少的利率。但把它拉下来似乎是一种耻辱。

茱莉亚说，她宁愿让别人住在那里。

“What’s going to happen to you?”

“你会怎么样？”

“What, indeed? There are all kinds of suggestions. Aunt Fanny

Rosscommon wants me to live with her. Then Rex and Julia talk of taking

over half Brideshead and living there. Papa won’t come back. We thought

he might, but no.

“什么，真的吗？有各种各样的建议。范妮·罗斯康姆阿姨希望我和

她住在一起。然后雷克斯和茱莉亚谈到接管一半的布里德斯黑德并住

在那里。爸爸不会回来的。我们以为他会，但不是。

“They’ve closed the chapel at Brideshead, Bridey and the Bishop;

mummy’s Requiem was the last mass said there. After she was buried the

priest came in—I was there alone. I don’t think he saw me—and took out

the altar stone and put it in his bag; then he burned the wads of wool with

the holy oil on them and threw the ash outside; he emptied the holy-water

stoop and blew out the lamp in the sanctuary, and left the tabernacle open

and empty, as though from now on it was always to be Good Friday. I

suppose none of this makes any sense to you, Charles, poor agnostic. I

stayed there till he was gone, and then, suddenly, there wasn’t any chapel

there any more, just an oddly decorated room. I can’t tell you what it felt

like. You’ve never been to Tenebrae, I suppose?”

“他们关闭了布里德斯黑德、布里迪和主教的教堂;木乃伊的安魂曲

是那里说的最后一场弥撒。她被埋葬后，神父进来了——我一个人在

那里。我不认为他看见了我——然后拿出祭坛的石头放在他的包里;然

后他用圣油烧掉了羊毛，把灰烬扔在外面;他清空了圣水的弯腰，吹灭

了圣所里的灯，让会幕敞开着，空荡荡的，仿佛从现在开始永远是耶

稣受难日。我想这些对你来说都没有任何意义，查尔斯，可怜的不可

知论者。我呆在那里，直到他走了，然后，突然间，那里再也没有教

堂了，只有一个装饰奇怪的房间。我无法告诉你那是什么感觉。我想

你从来没去过Tenebrae吧？

“Never.”

“绝不。”

“Well, if you had you’d know what the Jews felt about their temple.

Quomodo sedet sola civitas… it’s a beautiful chant. You ought to go once,

just to hear it.”

“好吧，如果你知道的话，你就会知道犹太人对他们圣殿的感受。

Quomodo sedet sola civitas...这是一首优美的吟唱。你应该去一次，只

是为了听到它。

“Still trying to convert me, Cordelia?”

“还在想让我皈依吗，科迪莉亚？”

“Oh, no. That’s all over, too. D’you know what papa said when he

became a Catholic? Mummy told me once. He said to her: ‘You have

brought back my family to the faith of their ancestors.’ Pompous, you

know. It takes people different ways. Anyhow, the family haven’t been very

constant, have they? There’s him gone and Sebastian gone and Julia gone.

But God won’t let them go for long, you know. I wonder if you remember

the story mummy read us the evening Sebastian first got drunk—I mean the

bad evening. ‘Father Brown’ said something like ‘I caught him’ (the thief)

‘with an unseen hook and an invisible line which is long enough to let him

wander to the ends of the world and still to bring him back with a twitch

upon the thread.’ ”

“哦，不。这也结束了。你知道爸爸成为天主教徒时说了什么吗？

妈妈曾经告诉我。他对她说：“你把我的家人带回了他们祖先的信仰。

浮夸，你知道的。它需要人们以不同的方式。不管怎么说，这个家庭

不是很稳定，不是吗？他走了，塞巴斯蒂安走了，朱莉娅走了。但你

知道，上帝不会让他们走太久。我想知道你是否还记得塞巴斯蒂安第

一次喝醉的那天晚上妈妈给我们读的故事——我是说那个糟糕的夜

晚。“布朗神父”说，“我抓住了他”（小偷），“用一个看不见的钩子和

一条看不见的线，这条线足够长，可以让他游荡到世界的尽头，但仍

然能用线的抽搐把他带回来。"

We scarcely mentioned her mother. All the time we talked, she ate

voraciously. Once she said:

我们很少提到她的母亲。我们聊天时，她都贪婪地吃东西。有一次

她说：

“Did you see Sir Adrian Porson’s poem in The Times? It’s funny: he

knew her best of anyone—he loved her all his life, you know—and yet it

doesn’t seem to have anything to do with her at all.

“你看到阿德里安·波尔森爵士在《泰晤士报》上的诗了吗？这很有

趣：他最了解她——他一生都爱着她，你知道的——但这似乎与她没

有任何关系。

“I got on best with her of any of us, but I don’t believe I ever really

loved her. Not as she wanted or deserved. It’s odd I didn’t, because I’m full

of natural affections.”

“我和她相处得最好，但我不相信我真的爱过她。不是她想要的或

应得的。奇怪的是我没有，因为我充满了自然的感情。

“I never really knew your mother,” I said.

“我从来不真正了解你的母亲，”我说。

“You didn’t like her. I sometimes think when people wanted to hate God

they hated mummy.”

“你不喜欢她。我有时想，当人们想恨上帝时，他们恨木乃伊。

“What do you mean by that, Cordelia?”

“你这是什么意思，科迪莉亚？”

“Well, you see, she was saintly but she wasn’t a saint. No one could

really hate a saint, could they? They can’t really hate God either. When they

want to hate him and his saints they have to find something like themselves

and pretend it’s God and hate that. I suppose you think that’s all bosh.”

“嗯，你看，她是圣人，但她不是圣人。没有人会真的恨圣人，不

是吗？他们也不能真的恨上帝。当他们想憎恨他和他的圣徒时，他们

必须找到像他们一样的东西，假装这是上帝并憎恨它。我想你认为这

都是嘘声。

“I heard almost the same thing once before—from someone very

different.”

“我以前听过一次几乎同样的话——来自一个非常不同的人。

“Oh, I’m quite serious. I’ve thought about it a lot. It seems to explain

poor mummy.”

“哦，我是认真的。我想了很多。这似乎解释了可怜的木乃伊。

Then this odd child tucked into her dinner with renewed relish. “First

time I’ve ever been taken out to dinner alone at a restaurant,” she said.

然后，这个奇怪的孩子又津津有味地吃起了晚餐。“我第一次被单

独带去餐厅吃饭，”她说。

Later: “When Julia heard they were selling Marchers she said: ‘Poor

Cordelia. She won’t have her coming-out ball there after all.’ It’s a thing we

used to talk about—like my being her bridesmaid. That didn’t come off

either. When Julia had her ball I was allowed down for an hour, to sit in the

corner with Aunt Fanny, and she said, ‘In six years’ time you’ll have all

this.’… I hope I’ve got a vocation.”

后来：“当茱莉亚听说他们要卖游行者时，她说：'可怜的科迪莉

亚。毕竟她不会在那里打球。这是我们曾经谈论过的事情——就像我

是她的伴娘一样。那也没有脱落。当茱莉亚参加舞会时，我被允许下

来一个小时，和范妮姨妈坐在角落里，她说，“六年后你就会拥有这一

切。...我希望我有一个职业。

“I don’t know what that means.”

“我不知道这意味着什么。”

“It means you can be a nun. If you haven’t a vocation it’s no good

however much you want to be; and if you have a vocation, you can’t get

away from it, however much you hate it. Bridey thinks he has a vocation

and hasn’t. I used to think Sebastian had and hated it—but I don’t know

now. Everything has changed so much suddenly.”

“这意味着你可以成为一名修女。如果你没有职业，无论你多么想

成为，都不好;如果你有一个职业，你就无法摆脱它，无论你多么讨厌

它。布莱迪认为他有职业，但没有。我曾经认为塞巴斯蒂安有过并且

讨厌它——但现在我不知道了。一切都突然发生了很大的变化。

But I had no patience with this convent chatter. I had felt the brush take

life in my hand that afternoon; I had had my finger in the great, succulent

pie of creation. I was a man of the Renaissance that evening—of

Browning’s renaissance. I, who had walked the streets of Rome in Genoa

velvet and had seen the stars through Galileo’s tube, spurned the friars, with

their dusty tomes and their sunken, jealous eyes and their crabbed hair-

splitting speech.

但我对这种修道院的喋喋不休没有耐心。那天下午，我感觉到画笔

在我手中夺走了生命;我把手指伸进了创造的伟大而多汁的馅饼中。那

天晚上，我是文艺复兴时期的人——勃朗宁文艺复兴时期的人。我穿

着热那亚的天鹅绒走在罗马的街道上，通过伽利略的管子看到星星，

我唾弃了修道士，他们满是灰尘的书，凹陷的，嫉妒的眼睛和他们令

人毛骨悚然的演讲。

“You’ll fall in love,” I said.

“你会坠入爱河的，”我说。

“Oh, pray not. I say, do you think I could have another of those

scrumptious meringues?”

“噢，不要祈祷。我说，你觉得我能再吃一个美味的蛋白酥皮吗？

BOOK THREE

第三册

A Twitch upon the Thread

线程上的抽搐

One

My theme is memory, that winged host that soared about me one gray

morning of war-time.

我的主题是记忆，那个有翅膀的主人，在战争时期一个灰色的早晨在

我周围翱翔。

These memories, which are my life—for we possess nothing certainly

except the past—were always with me. Like the pigeons of St. Mark’s, they

were everywhere, under my feet, singly, in pairs, in little honey-voiced

congregations, nodding, strutting, winking, rolling the tender feathers of

their necks, perching sometimes, if I stood still, on my shoulder; until,

suddenly, the noon gun boomed and in a moment, with a flutter and sweep

of wings, the pavement was bare and the whole sky above dark with a

tumult of fowl. Thus it was that morning of war-time.

這些記憶，就是我的生命——因為除了過去，我們一無所有——一

直與我同在。就像圣马可的鸽子一样，它们无处不在，在我的脚下，

成双成对，成群结队地，在小小的蜜声中，点头，昂首阔步，眨眼，

滚动脖子上柔软的羽毛，有时，如果我站着不动，就栖息在我的肩膀

上;直到，突然，中午的枪声响起，不一会儿，随着翅膀的扑腾和扫

动，人行道光秃秃的，整个天空都笼罩着一阵喧嚣的鸟叫声。就这

样，那是战时的那个早晨。

For nearly ten dead years after that evening with Cordelia I was borne

along a road outwardly full of change and incident, but never during that

time, except sometimes in my painting—and that at longer and longer

intervals—did I come alive as I had been during the time of my friendship

with Sebastian. I took it to be youth, not life, that I was losing. My work

upheld me, for I had chosen to do what I could do well, did better daily, and

liked doing; incidentally it was something which no one else at that time

was attempting to do. I became an architectural painter.

在与科迪莉亚的那天晚上之后的将近十年里，我沿着一条外表充满

变化和事件的道路前进，但在那段时间里，除了有时在我的画中——

而且间隔越来越长——我从未像我与塞巴斯蒂安的友谊时期那样活过

来。我以为我失去的是青春，而不是生命。我的工作支撑着我，因为

我选择做我能做好的事情，每天做得更好，并且喜欢做;顺便说一句，

这是当时没有其他人试图做的事情。我成为了一名建筑画家。

More even than the work of the great architects, I loved buildings that

grew silently with the centuries, catching and keeping the best of each

generation, while time curbed the artist’s pride and the Philistine’s

vulgarity, and repaired the clumsiness of the dull workman. In such

buildings England abounded, and, in the last decade of their grandeur,

Englishmen seemed for the first time to become conscious of what before

was taken for granted, and to salute their achievement at the moment of

extinction. Hence my prosperity, far beyond my merits; my work had

nothing to recommend it except my growing technical skill, enthusiasm for

my subject, and independence of popular notions.

比起伟大建筑师的作品，我更喜欢那些随着世纪而悄无声息地成长

的建筑，捕捉并保留了每一代人最好的一面，而时间遏制了艺术家的

骄傲和非利士人的粗俗，并修复了沉闷的工人的笨拙。在这样的建筑

中，英格兰比比皆是，在他们宏伟的最后十年里，英国人似乎第一次

意识到以前被认为是理所当然的事情，并在灭绝的那一刻向他们的成

就致敬。因此，我的繁荣，远远超出了我的功德;我的作品除了我不断

增长的技术技能、对我的主题的热情和对流行观念的独立性之外，没

有什么值得推荐的。

The financial slump of the period, which left many painters without

employment, served to enhance my success, which was, indeed, itself a

symptom of the decline. When the water-holes were dry people sought to

drink at the mirage. After my first exhibition I was called to all parts of the

country to make portraits of houses that were soon to be deserted or

debased; indeed, my arrival seemed often to be only a few paces ahead of

the auctioneer’s, a presage of doom.

这一时期的经济萧条使许多画家失业，这增强了我的成功，这本身

就是衰落的征兆。当水潭干涸时，人们试图在海市蜃楼喝水。在我的

第一次展览之后，我被召唤到全国各地，为那些即将被遗弃或贬低的

房屋制作肖像;事实上，我的到来似乎常常比拍卖师早几步，这是厄运

的预兆。

I published three splendid folios—Ryder’s Country Seats, Ryder’s

English Homes, and Ryder’s Village and Provincial Architecture, which

each sold its thousand copies at five guineas apiece. I seldom failed to

please, for there was no conflict between myself and my patrons; we both

wanted the same thing. But, as the years passed, I began to mourn the loss

of something I had known in the drawing-room of Marchmain House and

once or twice since, the intensity and singleness and the belief that it was

not all done by hand—in a word, the inspiration.

我出版了三本精彩的对开本——《莱德的乡村座位》（Ryder's

Country Seats）、《莱德的英国住宅》（Ryder's English Homes）和

《莱德的乡村与省级建筑》（Ryder's Village and Provincial

Architecture），每本都以每本五几内亚的价格售出一千册。我很少不

取悦，因为我和我的顾客之间没有冲突;我们都想要同样的东西。但

是，随着岁月的流逝，我开始哀悼我在马奇曼宫的客厅里所知道的东

西的丧失，以及从那以后的一两次，那种强度和单一性，以及相信它

不是全部手工完成的——一句话，灵感。

In quest of this fading light I went abroad, in the augustan manner, laden

with the apparatus of my trade, for two years’ refreshment among alien

styles. I did not go to Europe; her treasures were safe, too safe, swaddled in

expert care, obscured by reverence. Europe could wait. There would be a

time for Europe, I thought; all too soon the days would come when I should

need a man at my side to put up my easel and carry my paints; when I could

not venture more than an hour’s journey from a good hotel; when I should

need soft breezes and mellow sunshine all day long; then I would take my

old eyes to Germany and Italy. Now while I had the strength I would go to

the wild lands where man had deserted his post and the jungle was creeping

back to its old strongholds.

为了寻找这种渐渐消逝的光芒，我以奥古斯都的方式，带着我的贸

易工具出国，在陌生的风格中度过了两年的茶点。我没有去欧洲;她的

宝藏是安全的，太安全了，在专家的护理下襁褓，被崇敬所掩盖。欧

洲可以等待。我想，欧洲总有一天;很快，我需要一个人在我身边架起

我的画架，搬运我的颜料的日子就要到来了;当我不能冒险从一家好酒

店出发超过一个小时的路程时;当我整天需要柔和的微风和柔和的阳光

时;然后我会把我的老眼睛带到德国和意大利。现在，趁着我有力气，

我会去荒野，那里的人类已经离开了他的岗位，丛林正在悄悄地回到

它的旧据点。

Accordingly, by slow but not easy stages, I travelled through Mexico

and Central America in a world which had all I needed, and the change

from parkland and hall should have quickened me and set me right with

myself. I sought inspiration among gutted palaces and cloisters embowered

in weed, derelict churches where the vampire-bats hung in the dome like

dry seed-pods and only the ants were ceaselessly astir tunneling in the rich

stalls; cities where no road led, and mausoleums where a single, agued

family of Indians sheltered from the rains. There in great labor, sickness,

and occasionally in some danger, I made the first drawings for Ryder’s

Latin America. Every few weeks I came to rest, finding myself once more

in the zone of trade or tourism, recuperated, set up my studio, transcribed

my sketches, anxiously packed the complete canvases, dispatched them to

my New York agent and then set out again, with my small retinue, into the

wastes.

因此，通过缓慢但不容易的阶段，我穿越了墨西哥和中美洲，在一

个拥有我所需要的一切的世界里，从公园和大厅的变化应该让我加快

速度，让我对自己保持正确的态度。我在杂草丛生的破败宫殿和回廊

中寻找灵感，废弃的教堂，吸血蝙蝠像干燥的种子荚一样挂在圆顶

上，只有蚂蚁在富饶的摊位上不停地搅动隧道;没有道路通向的城市，

以及一个印第安人家庭避雨的陵墓。在那里，我经历了巨大的劳动、

疾病，偶尔还冒着一些危险，为莱德的拉丁美洲画了第一幅画。每隔

几个星期，我就会休息一下，发现自己又回到了贸易或旅游领域，休

养生息，建立我的工作室，抄写我的草图，焦急地打包完整的画布，

把它们寄给我的纽约经纪人，然后和我的小随从再次出发，进入荒

地。

I was in no great pains to keep in touch with England. I followed local

advice for my itinerary and had no settled route, so that much of my mail

never reached me, and the rest accumulated until there was more than could

be read at a sitting. I used to stuff a bundle of letters into my bag and read

them when I felt inclined, which was in circumstances so incongruous—

swinging in my hammock, under the net, by the light of a storm-lantern;

drifting down river, amidships in the canoe, with the boys astern of me

lazily keeping our nose out of the bank, with the dark water keeping pace

with us, in the green shade, with the great trees towering above us and the

monkeys screeching in the sunlight, high overhead among the flowers on

the roof of the forest; on the veranda of a hospitable ranch, where the ice

and the dice clicked, and a tiger cat played with its chain on the mown grass

—that they seemed voices so distant as to be meaningless; their matter

passed clean through the mind, and out, leaving no mark, like the facts

about themselves which fellow travelers distribute so freely in American

railway trains.

我毫不费力地与英国保持联系。我听从了当地的建议，没有固定的

路线，所以我的大部分邮件都没有到达我手中，其余的邮件堆积起

来，直到坐下来读不完为止。我常常把一捆信塞进我的包里，在我感

到有倾向的时候读它们，这在如此不协调的情况下——在我的吊床

上，在网下，在暴风雨灯的灯光下荡秋千;顺流而下，在独木舟的船中

间，我船尾的男孩们懒洋洋地把鼻子伸出岸边，黑水跟着我们，在绿

色的树荫下，大树耸立在我们头顶，猴子在阳光下尖叫，高高地在森

林屋顶的花丛中;在一个热情好客的牧场的阳台上，冰块和骰子咔嚓咔

嚓地响着，一只虎猫在割过的草地上玩着它的链子——它们的声音似

乎遥远得毫无意义;他们的事情在脑海中干净利落地流过，没有留下任

何痕迹，就像同路人在美国火车上如此自由地散布的关于他们自己的

事实一样。

But despite this isolation and this long sojourn in a strange world, I

remained unchanged, still a small part of myself pretending to be whole. I

discarded the experiences of those two years with my tropical kit and

returned to New York as I had set out. I had a fine haul—eleven paintings

and fifty odd drawings—and when eventually I exhibited them in London,

the art critics, many of whom hitherto had been patronizing in tone, as my

success invited, acclaimed a new and richer note in my work. Mr. Ryder, the

most respected of them wrote, rises like a fresh young trout to the

hypodermic injection of a new culture and discloses a powerful facet in the

vista of his potentialities…. By focusing the frankly traditional battery of

his elegance and erudition on the maelstrom of barbarism, Mr. Ryder has at

last found himself.

但是，尽管与世隔绝，在一个陌生的世界里逗留了这么久，我仍然

没有改变，仍然有一小部分假装自己是完整的。我摒弃了那两年的经

历，带着我的热带装备回到了纽约。我拍了11幅画和50多幅素描，最

终在伦敦展出时，艺术评论家们——其中许多人迄今为止一直以我的

成功为灵感——在我的作品中留下了新的、更丰富的音符。莱德先生

是他们中最受尊敬的一位，他像一条新鲜的年轻鳟鱼一样，在皮下注

射新文化中崛起，并在他的潜力前景中揭示了一个强大的方面。通过

坦率地将他的优雅和博学的传统电池集中在野蛮的漩涡上，莱德先生

终于找到了自己。

Grateful words, but, alas, not true by a long chalk. My wife, who

crossed to New York to meet me and saw the fruits of our separation

displayed in my agent’s office, summed the thing up better by saying: “Of

course, I can see they’re perfectly brilliant and really rather beautiful in a

sinister way, but somehow I don’t feel they are quite you.”

感激的话，但是，唉，用长粉笔来说不是真的。我的妻子越过纽约

来见我，看到我们分居的成果展示在我的经纪人办公室里，她总结

说：“当然，我可以看到他们非常聪明，以一种险恶的方式真的相当美

丽，但不知何故，我不觉得他们完全是你。

In Europe my wife was sometimes taken for an American because of her

dapper and jaunty way of dressing, and the curiously hygienic quality of her

prettiness; in America she assumed an English softness and reticence. She

arrived a day or two before me, and was on the pier when my ship docked.

在欧洲，我的妻子有时被当作美国人，因为她的穿着方式很漂亮，而

且她很漂亮，很有卫生感;在美国，她表现出英国人的软弱和沉默寡

言。她比我早一两天到达，当我的船停靠时，她正在码头上。

“It has been a long time,” she said fondly when we met.

“已经很久了，”当我们见面时，她深情地说。

She had not joined the expedition; she explained to our friends that the

country was unsuitable and she had her son at home. There was also a

daughter now, she remarked, and it came back to me that there had been

talk of this before I started, as an additional reason for her staying behind.

There had been some mention of it, too, in her letters.

她没有参加探险队;她向我们的朋友解释说，这个国家不适合，她

把儿子留在家里。她说，现在还有一个女儿，我回想起来，在我开始

之前，有人谈论过这件事，这是她留下来的另一个原因。在她的信中

也提到了这一点。

“I don’t believe you read my letters,” she said that night, when at last,

late, after a dinner party and some hours at a cabaret, we found ourselves

alone in our hotel bedroom.

“我不相信你读过我的信，”那天晚上，她终于在晚宴上吃了几个小

时，在歌舞表演了几个小时之后，我们发现自己一个人在酒店的卧室

里。

“Some went astray. I remember distinctly your telling me that the

daffodils in the orchard were a dream, that the nursery-maid was a jewel,

that the Regency four-poster was a find, but frankly I do not remember

hearing that your new baby was called Caroline. Why did you call it that?”

“有些人误入歧途。我清楚地记得你告诉我，果园里的水仙花是

梦，保育员是宝石，摄政四柱是发现，但坦率地说，我不记得听说过

你的新宝宝叫卡罗琳。你为什么这么称呼它？

“After Charles, of course.”

“当然是在查尔斯之后。”

“Ah!”

“啊！”

“I made Bertha Van Halt godmother. I thought she was safe for a good

present. What do you think she gave?”

“我让伯莎·范·哈尔特（Bertha Van Halt）成为教母。我以为她很安

全，可以得到一份好礼物。你觉得她给了什么？

“Bertha Van Halt is a well-known trap. What?”

“Bertha Van Halt 是一个众所周知的陷阱。什么？

“A fifteen shilling book-token. Now that Johnjohn has a companion—”

“一个十五先令的书令牌。现在约翰有了一个同伴——”

“Who?”

“谁？”

“Your son, darling. You haven’t forgotten him, too?”

“你的儿子，亲爱的。你也没忘记他吗？

“For Christ’s sake,” I said, “why do you call him that?”

“看在基督的份上，”我说，“你为什么这么称呼他呢？

“It’s the name he invented for himself. Don’t you think it sweet? Now

that Johnjohn has a companion I think we’d better not have any more for

some time, don’t you?”

“这是他为自己发明的名字。你不觉得这很甜蜜吗？现在约翰有了

一个同伴，我想我们最好不要再有一段时间了，不是吗？

“Just as you please.”

“随你便。”

“Johnjohn talks of you such a lot. He prays every night for your safe

return.”

“约翰约翰经常谈论你。他每天晚上都为你平安归来祈祷。

She talked in this way while she undressed, with an effort to appear at

ease; then she sat at the dressing table, ran a comb through her hair, and

with her bare back towards me, looking at herself in the glass, said: “Shall I

put my face to bed?”

她一边脱衣服一边这样说话，努力让自己显得轻松自在;然后她坐

在梳妆台前，用梳子梳理头发，光着背对着我，看着镜子里的自己，

说：“我可以把脸放在床上吗？

It was a familiar phrase, one that I did not like; she meant, should she

remove her make-up, cover herself with grease and put her hair in a net.

这是一个熟悉的短语，一个我不喜欢的短语;她的意思是，她应该

卸妆，用油脂盖住自己，把头发放在网里。

“No,” I said, “not at once.”

“不，”我说，“不是马上。

Then she knew what was wanted. She had neat, hygienic ways for that

too, but there were both relief and triumph in her smile of welcome; later

we parted and lay in our twin beds a yard or two distant, smoking. I looked

at my watch; it was four o’clock, but neither of us was ready to sleep, for in

that city there is neurosis in the air which the inhabitants mistake for energy.

然后她知道自己想要什么。她也有整洁、卫生的方法，但她欢迎的

微笑中既有宽慰又有胜利;后来我们分开了，躺在一两码远的地方的两

张单人床上，抽着烟。我看了看手表;现在是四点钟，但我们俩都没准

备好睡觉，因为在那个城市里，空气中弥漫着一种神经症，居民们误

以为是能量。

“I don’t believe you’ve changed at all, Charles.”

“我不相信你变了，查尔斯。

“No, I’m afraid not.”

“不，恐怕不行。”

“D’you want to change?”

“你想改变吗？”

“It’s the only evidence of life.”

“这是生命的唯一证据。”

“But you might change so that you didn’t love me anymore.”

“但你可能会改变，这样你就不再爱我了。”

“There is that risk.”

“有这种风险。”

“Charles, you haven’t stopped loving me?”

“查尔斯，你还没有停止爱我吗？”

“You said yourself I hadn’t changed.”

“你自己说我没有改变。”

“Well, I’m beginning to think you have. I haven’t.”

“嗯，我开始认为你有。我没有。

“No,” I said, “no; I can see that.”

“不，”我说，“不;我能看出来。

“Were you at all frightened at meeting me today?”

“你今天见到我，是不是很害怕？”

“Not the least.”

“不是最不重要的。”

“You didn’t wonder if I should have fallen in love with someone else in

the meantime?”

“你没有想过我是否应该在此期间爱上别人吗？”

“No. Have you?”

“不。你有吗？

“You know I haven’t. Have you?”

“你知道我没有。你有吗？

“No. I’m not in love.”

“不。我没有恋爱。

My wife seemed content with this answer. She had married me six years

ago at the time of my first exhibition, and had done much since then to push

our interests. People said she had “made” me, but she herself took credit

only for supplying me with a congenial background; she had firm faith in

my genius and in the “artistic temperament,” and in the principle that things

done on the sly are not really done at all.

我的妻子似乎对这个答案很满意。六年前，在我第一次举办展览

时，她已经嫁给了我，从那时起，她做了很多事情来推动我们的利

益。人们说她“造就”了我，但她自己只是因为为我提供了一个融洽的

背景而受到赞誉;她对我的天才和“艺术气质”有着坚定的信心，并且相

信偷偷摸摸地做过的事情根本不是真的做过的原则。

Presently she said: “Looking forward to getting home?” (My father gave

me as a wedding present the price of a house, and I bought an old rectory in

my wife’s part of the country.) “I’ve got a surprise for you.”

当下她说：“期待回家吗？（我父亲给了我一栋房子作为结婚礼

物，我在我妻子所在的地区买了一座旧教区长。“我有个惊喜要给

你。”

“Yes?”

“是吗？”

“I’ve turned the old barn into a studio for you, so that you needn’t be

disturbed by the children or when we have people to stay. I got Emden to do

it. Everyone thinks it a great success. There was an article on it in Country

Life; I bought it for you to see.”

“我把旧谷仓变成了你的工作室，这样你就不必被孩子们打扰，也

不必有人留下来。我让埃姆登去做。每个人都认为这是一个巨大的成

功。《乡村生活》上有一篇关于它的文章;我买给你看的。

She showed me the article: “… happy example of architectural good

manners…. Sir Joseph Emden’s tactful adaptation of traditional material to

modern needs…”; there were some photographs; wide oak boards now

covered the earthen floor; a high, stone-mullioned bay-window had been

built in the north wall, and the great timbered roof, which before had been

lost in shadow, now stood out stark, well lit, with clean white plaster

between the beams; it looked like a village hall. I remembered the smell of

the place, which would now be lost.

她给我看了这篇文章：“......建筑礼仪的快乐例子......约瑟夫·埃姆登

爵士巧妙地将传统材料改编为现代需求......“;有一些照片;宽阔的橡木板

现在覆盖了土地板;北墙上建了一扇高高的石砌直棂凸窗，以前消失在

阴影中的大木屋顶现在显得格外醒目，光线充足，横梁之间有干净的

白色石膏;它看起来像一个乡村礼堂。我记得这个地方的气味，现在已

经消失了。

“I rather liked that barn,” I said.

“我挺喜欢那个谷仓的，”我说。

“But you’ll be able to work there, won’t you?”

“但你可以在那里工作，不是吗？”

“After squatting in a cloud of sting-fly,” I said, “under a sun which

scorched the paper off the block as I drew, I could work on the top of an

omnibus. I expect the vicar would like to borrow the place for whist

drives.”

“蹲在一团苍蝇中，”我说，“在太阳下，当我画画时，我把纸从木

块上烧焦了，我可以在一辆综合巴士的顶部工作。我想牧师想借用这

个地方来开车。

“There’s a lot of work waiting for you. I promised Lady Anchorage you

would do Anchorage House as soon as you got back. That’s coming down,

too, you know—shops underneath and two-roomed flats above. You don’t

think, do you, Charles, that all this exotic work you’ve been doing, is going

to spoil you for that sort of thing?”

“有很多工作等着你。我答应过安克雷奇夫人，你一回来就去安克

雷奇之家。你知道，这也在下降——下面的商店和上面的两居室公

寓。你不认为，查尔斯，你所做的所有这些异国情调的工作，会因为

这种事情而宠坏你吗？”

“Why should it?”

“为什么要这样？”

“Well, it’s so different. Don’t be cross.”

“嗯，这太不同了。不要过马路。

“It’s just another jungle closing in.”

“这只是另一个正在逼近的丛林。”

“I know just how you feel, darling. The Georgian Society made such a

fuss, but we couldn’t do anything…. Did you ever get my letter about

Boy?”

“我知道你的感受，亲爱的。格鲁吉亚协会大惊小怪，但我们无能

为力......你有没有收到我关于男孩的信？

“Did I? What did it say?”

“是吗？它说了什么？

(“Boy” Mulcaster was her brother.)

（“男孩”穆尔卡斯特是她的哥哥。

“About his engagement. It doesn’t matter now because it’s all off, but

father and mother were terribly upset. She was an awful girl. They had to

give her money in the end.”

“关于他的订婚。现在没关系了，因为一切都结束了，但爸爸妈妈

非常难过。她是个可怕的女孩。他们最后不得不给她钱。

“No, I heard nothing of Boy.”

“不，我没听说过男孩。”

“He and Johnjohn are tremendous friends, now. It’s so sweet to see them

together. Whenever he comes the first thing he does is to drive straight to

the Old Rectory. He just walks into the house, pays no attention to anyone

else, and hollers out: ‘Where’s my chum Johnjohn?’ and Johnjohn comes

tumbling downstairs and off they go into the spinney together and play for

hours. You’d think, to hear them talk to each other, they were the same age.

It was really Johnjohn who made him see reason about that girl; seriously,

you know, he’s frightfully sharp. He must have heard mother and me

talking because next time Boy came he said: ‘Uncle Boy shan’t marry

horrid girl and leave Johnjohn,’ and that was the very day he settled for two

thousand pounds out of court. Johnjohn admires Boy so tremendously and

imitates him in everything. It’s so good for them both.”

“他和约翰现在是好朋友。看到他们在一起真是太甜蜜了。每当他

来的时候，他做的第一件事就是直接开车去老教区。他只是走进屋

子，不理会其他人，大声喊道：“我的傻瓜约翰约翰在哪里？”然后约

翰约翰从楼上滚下来，他们一起进了纺纱厂，玩了几个小时。你会

想，听他们互相交谈，他们是同龄人。真的是约翰约翰让他明白了那

个女孩的道理;说真的，你知道，他非常敏锐。他一定听到了妈妈和我

说话，因为下次男孩来的时候，他说：'男孩叔叔不要娶可怕的女孩，

离开约翰约翰'，就在那一天，他在法庭外以两千英镑的价格达成了和

解。约翰约翰非常钦佩男孩，并在所有事情上模仿他。这对他们俩来

说都太好了。

I crossed the room and tried once more, ineffectively, to moderate the

heat of the radiators; I drank some iced water and opened the window, but,

besides the sharp night air, music was borne in from the next room where

they were playing the wireless. I shut it and turned back towards my wife.

我穿过房间，再次尝试缓和散热器的热量，但无效;我喝了点冰

水，打开了窗户，但是，除了刺鼻的夜风之外，音乐从隔壁房间传

来，他们正在播放无线。我关上门，转身走向我的妻子。

At length she began talking again, more drowsily…“The garden’s come

on a lot…. The box hedges you planted grew five inches last year…. I had

some men down from London to put the tennis court right… first-class

cook at the moment…”

最后，她又开始说话了，更昏昏欲睡了......“花园里来了......你种的

箱形树篱去年长了五英寸......我从伦敦请了一些人来把网球场修好......

此刻一流的厨师......”

As the city below us began to wake, we both fell asleep, but not for

long; the telephone rang and a voice of hermaphroditic gaiety said: “Savoy-

Carlton-Hotel-goodmorning. It is now a quarter of eight.”

当我们脚下的城市开始苏醒时，我们俩都睡着了，但时间不长;电

话响了，一个雌雄同体的欢乐声音说：“萨沃伊-卡尔顿-酒店-早上好。

现在是八分之一。

“I didn’t ask to be called, you know.”

“我没有要求被叫来，你知道的。”

“Pardon me?”

“给我拉窗帘？”

“Oh, it doesn’t matter.”

“哦，没关系。”

“You’re welcome.”

“不客气。”

As I was shaving, my wife from the bath said: “Just like old times. I’m

not worrying any more, Charles.”

当我刮胡子时，洗澡的妻子说：“就像过去一样。我再也不担心

了，查尔斯。

“Good.”

“好。”

“I was so terribly afraid that two years might have made a difference.

Now I know we can start again exactly where we left off.”

“我非常害怕两年可能会有所作为。现在我知道我们可以从上次中

断的地方重新开始。

“When?” I asked. “What? When we left off what?”

“什么时候？”我问。“什么？我们什么时候离开了什么？

“When you went away, of course.”

“当然是你走的时候。”

“You are not thinking of something else, a little time before?”

“你不是在想别的事吗，刚才？”

“Oh, Charles, that’s old history. That was nothing. It was never

anything. It’s all over and forgotten.”

“哦，查尔斯，那是古老的历史。那没什么。这从来都不是什么。

一切都结束了，被遗忘了。

“I just wanted to know,” I said. “We’re back as we were the day I went

abroad, is that it?”

“我只是想知道，”我说。“我们又回到了我出国那天的样子，是

吗？”

So we started that day exactly where we left off two years before, with

my wife in tears.

因此，我们从两年前离开的地方开始了这一天，我的妻子流下了眼

泪。

My wife’s softness and English reticence, her very white, small regular

teeth, her neat rosy finger-nails, her schoolgirl air of innocent mischief and

her schoolgirl dress, her modern jewelry, which was made at great expense

to give the impression, at a distance, of having been mass produced, her

ready, rewarding smile, her deference to me and her zeal in my interests, her

motherly heart which made her cable daily to the nanny at home—in short,

her peculiar charm—made her popular among the Americans, and our cabin

on the day of departure was full of cellophane packages—flowers, fruit,

sweets, books, toys for the children—from friends she had known for a

week. Stewards, like sisters in a nursing home, used to judge their

passengers’ importance by the number and value of these trophies; we

therefore started the voyage in high esteem.

我妻子的温柔和英式沉默寡言，她洁白而又小又整齐的指甲，她天真

无邪的女学生调皮的气息和她的女学生装束，她的现代珠宝，这些珠

宝是花大价钱制作的，远远地给人一种批量生产的印象，她准备好

的，有益的微笑，她对我的尊重和她对我的兴趣的热情，她慈母般的

心使她每天给家里的保姆打电报——总之，她独特的魅力——使她在

美国人中很受欢迎，出发那天我们的小屋里装满了玻璃纸包裹——鲜

花、水果、糖果、书籍、孩子们的玩具——来自她认识一个星期的朋

友。乘务员就像养老院的姐妹一样，过去常常通过这些奖杯的数量和

价值来判断乘客的重要性;因此，我们怀着崇高的敬意开始了这次航

行。

My wife’s first thought on coming aboard was of the passenger list.

我妻子上船后的第一个想法是乘客名单。

“Such a lot of friends,” she said. “It’s going to be a lovely trip. Let’s

have a cocktail party this evening.”

“这么多朋友，”她说。“这将是一次愉快的旅行。我们今晚来个鸡

尾酒会吧。

The companion-ways were no sooner cast off than she was busy with the

telephone.

同伴们很快就被抛弃了，她忙着打电话。

“Julia. This is Celia—Celia Ryder. It’s lovely to find you on board.

What have you been up to? Come and have a cocktail this evening and tell

me all about it.”

“茱莉亚。这是西莉亚——西莉亚·莱德。很高兴在船上找到你。你

一直在忙什么？今晚来喝杯鸡尾酒，告诉我所有的事情。

“Julia who?”

“茱莉亚是谁？”

“Mottram. I haven’t seen her for years.”

“莫特拉姆。我已经很多年没见到她了。

Nor had I; not, in fact, since my wedding day, not to speak to for any

time, since the private view of my exhibition where the four canvases of

Marchmain House, lent by Brideshead, had hung together attracting much

attention. Those pictures were my last contact with the Flytes; our lives, so

close for a year or two, had drawn apart. Sebastian, I knew, was still abroad;

Rex and Julia, I sometimes heard said, were unhappy together. Rex was not

prospering quite as well as had been predicted; he remained on the fringe of

the Government, prominent but vaguely suspect. He lived among the very

rich, and in his speeches seemed to incline to revolutionary policies, flirting

with Communists and Fascists. I heard the Mottrams’ names in

conversation; I saw their faces now and again peeping from the Tatler, as I

turned the pages impatiently waiting for someone to come, but they and I

had fallen apart, as one could in England and only there, into separate

worlds, little spinning planets of personal relationship; there is probably a

perfect metaphor for the process to be found in physics, from the way in

which, I dimly apprehend, particles of energy group and regroup themselves

in separate magnetic systems; a metaphor ready to hand for the man who

can speak of these things with assurance; not for me, who can only say that

England abounded in these small companies of intimate friends, so that, as

in this case of Julia and myself, we could live in the same street in London,

see at times, a few miles distant, the rural horizon, could have a liking one

for the other, a mild curiosity about the other’s fortunes, a regret, even, that

we should be separated, and the knowledge that either of us had only to

pick up the telephone and speak by the other’s pillow, enjoy the intimacies

of the levee, coming in, as it were, with the morning orange juice and the

sun, yet be restrained from doing so by the centripetal force of our own

worlds and the cold, interstellar space between them.

我也没有;事实上，从我结婚那天起，就再也没有和我说话了，因

为我的私人展览，布里德斯黑德借来的马奇曼宫的四幅画布挂在一

起，引起了人们的广泛关注。这些照片是我与Flytes的最后一次接触。

我们的生活，如此接近了一两年，已经分崩离析。我知道，塞巴斯蒂

安还在国外;雷克斯和茱莉亚，我有时听到有人说，在一起很不开心。

雷克斯并没有像预测的那样繁荣。他仍然处于政府的边缘，显赫但隐

约被怀疑。他生活在非常富有的人中间，在他的演讲中似乎倾向于革

命政策，与共产主义者和法西斯主义者调情。我在谈话中听到了莫特

拉姆的名字;当我不耐烦地翻开书页，等待有人来时，我时不时地看到

他们的脸从《Tatler》中窥视，但他们和我已经分崩离析，就像在英国

一样，只有在那里，才能分崩离析，进入不同的世界，个人关系的小

旋转星球;在物理学中可以找到一个完美的比喻来描述这个过程，从我

模糊地理解能量粒子在单独的磁系统中分组和重新组合的方式;一个比

喻，可以肯定地谈论这些事情的人;对我来说不是这样，我只能说英格

兰有很多亲密的朋友，所以，就像朱莉娅和我一样，我们可以住在伦

敦的同一条街上，有时看到几英里外的乡村地平线，可以对另一个人

有好感，对对方的命运有轻微的好奇心，甚至，我们感到遗憾，我们

应该分开，并且知道我们中的任何一个人只需要拿起电话，在对方的

枕头边说话，享受堤坝的亲密关系，就像早晨的橙汁和阳光一样，却

被我们自己世界的向心力和寒冷所束缚，他们之间的星际空间。

My wife, perched on the back of the sofa in a litter of cellophane and

silk ribbons, continued telephoning, working brightly through the passenger

list…“Yes, do of course bring him, I’m told he’s sweet…. Yes, I’ve got

Charles back from the wilds at last; isn’t it lovely…. What a treat seeing

your name in the list! It’s made my trip… darling, we were at the Savoy-

Carlton, too; how can we have missed you?”… Sometimes she turned to me

and said: “I have to make sure you’re still really there. I haven’t got used to

it yet.”

我的妻子坐在沙发靠背上，手里拿着一堆玻璃纸和丝带，继续打电

话，在乘客名单上工作......“是的，当然要带他来，我听说他很可爱......

是的，我终于把查尔斯从荒野中救回来了;是不是很可爱......看到你的

名字出现在名单中，真是一种享受！它让我的旅行......亲爱的，我们也

在萨沃伊卡尔顿酒店;我们怎么会想念你呢？...有时她转向我说：“我必

须确保你真的还在那里。我还没习惯。

I went up and out as we steamed slowly down the river to one of the

great glass cases where the passengers stood to watch the land slip by.

“Such a lot of friends,” my wife had said. They looked a strange crowd to

me; the emotions of leave-taking were just beginning to subside; some of

them, who had been drinking till the last moment with those who were

seeing them off, were still boisterous; others were planning where they

would have their deck chairs; the band played unnoticed—all were as

restless as ants.

我上下山，慢慢地顺流而下，来到一个巨大的玻璃柜前，乘客们站

在那里看着陆地滑过。“这么多朋友，”我妻子说。在我看来，他们是

一群奇怪的人;请假的情绪才刚刚开始消退;他们中的一些人，一直和

那些为他们送行的人一起喝酒到最后一刻，仍然喧闹;其他人则在计划

他们将躺椅放在哪里;乐队演奏时没有引起注意——所有人都像蚂蚁一

样焦躁不安。

I turned into some of the halls of the ship, which were huge without any

splendor, as though they had been designed for a railway coach and

preposterously magnified. I passed through vast bronze gates on which

paper-thin Assyrian animals cavorted; I trod carpets the color of blotting

paper; the painted panels of the walls were like blotting paper, too—

kindergarten work in flat, drab colors—and between the walls were yards

and yards of biscuit-colored wood which no carpenter’s tool had ever

touched, wood that had been bent round corners, invisibly joined strip to

strip, steamed and squeezed and polished; all over the blotting-paper carpet

were strewn tables designed perhaps by a sanitary engineer, square blocks

of stuffing, with square holes for sitting in, and upholstered, it seemed, in

blotting paper also; the light of the hall was suffused from scores of

hollows, giving an even glow, casting no shadows—the whole place

hummed from its hundred ventilators and vibrated with the turn of the great

engines below.

我拐进了船上的一些大厅，它们很大，没有任何光彩，好像它们是

为铁路客车设计的，并被荒谬地放大了。我穿过巨大的青铜门，薄如

纸的亚述动物在上面嬉戏;我踩着吸墨纸颜色的地毯;墙上的彩绘板也

像吸墨纸一样——幼儿园的工作是平淡的、单调的颜色——墙壁之间

是一码又一码的饼干色的木头，木匠的工具从来没有碰过，木头被弯

曲成圆角，看不见地连接着条带，蒸熟，挤压和抛光;吸墨纸地毯上到

处都是散落的桌子，也许是卫生工程师设计的，方形的填充物块，有

方形的孔，可以坐进去，似乎也是用吸墨纸装饰的;大厅的光线从几十

个空洞中弥漫出来，发出均匀的光芒，没有投下任何阴影——整个地

方从数百台通风机中嗡嗡作响，并随着下面巨大引擎的转动而振动。

“Here I am,” I thought, “back from the jungle, back from the ruins.

Here, where wealth is no longer gorgeous and power has no dignity.

Quomodo sedet sola civitas” (for I had heard that great lament, which

Cordelia once quoted to me in the drawing-room of Marchmain House,

sung by a half-caste choir in Guatemala, nearly a year ago).

“我在这里，”我想，“从丛林中回来，从废墟中回来。在这里，财

富不再华丽，权力没有尊严。Quomodo sedet sola civitas“（因为我听过

那首伟大的哀歌，科迪莉亚曾经在马奇曼宫的客厅里向我引用过这首

歌，大约一年前，危地马拉的一个半种姓合唱团唱了这首歌）。

A steward came up to me.

一个管家向我走来。

“Can I get you anything, sir?”

“先生，我能给你点什么吗？”

“A whisky and soda, not iced.”

“威士忌和苏打水，不是冰镇的。”

“I’m sorry, sir, all the soda is iced.”

“对不起，先生，所有的苏打水都是冰的。”

“Is the water iced, too?”

“水也结冰了吗？”

“Oh yes, sir.”

“哦，是的，先生。”

“Well, it doesn’t matter.”

“嗯，没关系。”

He trotted off, puzzled, soundless in the pervading hum.

他小跑着离开了，困惑不解，在弥漫的嗡嗡声中无声无息。

“Charles.”

“查尔斯。”

I looked behind me. Julia was sitting in a cube of blotting paper, her

hands folded in her lap, so still that I had passed by without noticing her.

我看了看身后。茱莉亚坐在一张吸墨纸里，双手交叉放在膝盖上，

一动不动，我从身边经过时没有注意到她。

“I heard you were here. Celia telephoned to me. It’s delightful.”

“我听说你在这里。西莉亚打电话给我。这是令人愉快的。

“What are you doing?”

“你在干什么？”

She opened the empty hands in her lap with a little eloquent gesture.

“Waiting. My maid’s unpacking; she’s been so disagreeable ever since we

left England. She’s complaining now about my cabin. I can’t think why. It

seems a lap to me.”

她张开膝盖上空荡荡的双手，做了一个有点雄辩的手势。“等着。

我的女仆正在拆包;自从我们离开英国以来，她一直很不愉快。她现在

抱怨我的小屋。我想不出为什么。对我来说，这似乎是一圈。

The steward returned with whisky and two jugs, one of iced water, the

other of boiling water; I mixed them to the right temperature. He watched

and said: “I’ll remember that’s how you take it, sir.”

管家带着威士忌和两个水壶回来了，一个是冰水，另一个是开水;

我将它们混合到合适的温度。他看了看，说：“我会记住你是怎么接受

的，先生。

Most passengers had fads; he was paid to fortify their self-esteem. Julia

asked for a cup of hot chocolate. I sat by her in the next cube.

大多数乘客都有时尚;他得到报酬是为了加强他们的自尊心。茱莉

亚要了一杯热巧克力。我坐在她旁边的隔壁立方体里。

“I never see you now,” she said. “I never seem to see anyone I like. I

don’t know why.”

“我现在再也见不到你了，”她说。“我似乎从未见过我喜欢的人。

我不知道为什么。

But she spoke as though it were a matter of weeks rather than of years;

as though, too, before our parting we had been firm friends. It was dead

contrary to the common experience of such encounters, when time is found

to have built its own defensive lines, camouflaged vulnerable points, and

laid a field of mines across all but a few well-trodden paths, so that, more

often than not, we can only signal to one another from either side of the

tangle of wire. Here she and I, who were never friends before, met on terms

of long and unbroken intimacy.

但她说话时好像是几个星期而不是几年的事情;好像在我们分手之

前，我们也是坚定的朋友。这与这种遭遇战的常见经验背道而驰，当

时人们发现时间已经建立了自己的防线，伪装了脆弱的点，并在除了

几条人迹罕至的小路之外的所有道路上埋下了地雷，因此，我们通常

只能从纠缠在一起的铁丝网的两侧相互发出信号。在这里，她和我，

以前从来都不是朋友，在长期不间断的亲密关系中相遇。

“What have you been doing in America?”

“你在美国做什么？”

She looked up slowly from her chocolate and, her splendid, serious eyes

in mine, said: “Don’t you know? I’ll tell you about it sometime. I’ve been a

mug. I thought I was in love with someone, but it didn’t turn out that way.”

And my mind went back ten years to the evening at Brideshead, when that

lovely, spidery child of nineteen, as though brought in for an hour from the

nursery and nettled by lack of attention from the grown-ups, had said: “I’m

causing anxiety, too, you know,” and I had thought at the time, though

scarcely, it now seemed to me, in long trousers myself, “How important

these girls make themselves with their love affairs.”

她慢慢地从巧克力中抬起头来，用她那双灿烂而严肃的眼睛看着我

说：“你不知道吗？我一会儿会告诉你的。我一直是一个杯子。我以为

我爱上了一个人，但事实并非如此。我的思绪回到了十年前在布里德

斯黑德的那个晚上，那个可爱的、蜘蛛般的十九岁孩子，好像从托儿

所带了一个小时，由于缺乏大人们的注意而感到不安，他说：“我也在

引起焦虑，你知道的，”我当时想过，虽然很少，但现在在我看来，

我自己穿着长裤，“这些女孩在爱情中让自己变得多么重要。

Now it was different; there was nothing but humility and friendly candor

in the way she spoke.

现在不一样了;她说话的方式只有谦逊和友好的坦率。

I wished I could respond to her confidence, give some token of

acceptance, but there was nothing in my last, flat, eventful years that I could

share with her. I began instead to talk of my time in the jungle, of the comic

characters I had met and the lost places I had visited, but in this mood of old

friendship the tale faltered and came to an end abruptly.

我希望我能回应她的信任，给予一些接受的象征，但在我最后的、

平淡的、多事的岁月里，我没有什么可以与她分享的。我开始谈论我

在丛林中的时光，我遇到的漫画人物和我去过的失落的地方，但在这

种旧友谊的气氛中，这个故事摇摇欲坠，戛然而止。

“I long to see the paintings,” she said.

“我很想看这些画，”她说。

“Celia wanted me to unpack some and stick them round the cabin for her

cocktail party. I couldn’t do that.”

“西莉亚想让我打开一些包装，把它们贴在小屋里，为她的鸡尾酒

会做准备。我做不到。

“No… is Celia as pretty as ever? I always thought she had the most

delicious looks of any girl of my year.”

“不......西莉亚一如既往地漂亮吗？我一直认为她拥有我这一年所有

女孩中最漂亮的长相。

“She hasn’t changed.”

“她没有变。”

“You have, Charles. So lean and grim; not at all the pretty boy Sebastian

brought home with him. Harder, too.”

“你有，查尔斯。如此瘦弱和冷酷;根本不是塞巴斯蒂安带回家的那

个漂亮男孩。也更难。

“And you’re softer.”

“而且你更柔软。”

“Yes, I think so… and very patient now.”

“是的，我想是的......现在很有耐心。

She was not yet thirty, but was approaching the zenith of her loveliness,

all her rich promise abundantly fulfilled. She had lost that fashionable,

spidery look; the head that I used to think quattrocento, which had sat a

little oddly on her, was now part of herself and not at all Florentine; not

connected in any way with painting or the arts or with anything except

herself, so that it would be idle to itemize and dissect her beauty, which was

her own essence, and could only be known in her and by her authority and

in the love I was soon to have for her.

她还不到三十岁，但已经接近她可爱的顶峰，她所有丰富的承诺都

得到了充分的实现。她已经失去了那种时髦的、蜘蛛般的外表;我曾经

认为quattrocento的头，有点奇怪地坐在她身上，现在是她自己的一部

分，根本不是佛罗伦萨;她与绘画、艺术或除了她自己之外的任何东西

都没有任何联系，因此，逐项分解和剖析她的美是无聊的，这是她自

己的本质，只有在她身上，在她的权威和我很快就对她的爱中才能知

道。

Time had wrought another change, too; not for her the sly, complacent

smile of la Gioconda; the years had been more than “the sound of lyres and

flutes,” and had saddened her. She seemed to say: “Look at me. I have done

my share. I am beautiful. It is something quite out of the ordinary, this

beauty of mine. I am made for delight. But what do I get out of it? Where is

my reward?”

时间也带来了另一个变化;对她来说，不是拉乔康达的狡猾、自满

的微笑;岁月不仅仅是“七弦琴和笛子的声音”，而且让她感到悲伤。她

似乎在说：“看着我。我已经尽了自己的一份力量。我很漂亮。这是一

件非常不寻常的事情，我的这种美丽。我是为喜悦而生的。但是我能

从中得到什么呢？我的奖赏在哪里？

That was the change in her from ten years ago; that, indeed, was her

reward, this haunting, magical sadness which spoke straight to the heart and

struck silence; it was the completion of her beauty.

这是她与十年前相比的变化;这确实是她的奖赏，这种萦绕心头

的、神奇的悲伤直击人心，使人沉默;这是她美丽的完成。

“Sadder, too,” I said.

“也更难过，”我说。

“Oh yes, much sadder.”

“哦，是的，更难过。”

My wife was in exuberant spirits when, two hours later, I returned to the

cabin.

两个小时后，我回到小屋时，我的妻子精神抖擞。

“I’ve had to do everything. How does it look?”

“我不得不做任何事情。它看起来怎么样？

We had been given, without paying more for it, a large suite of rooms,

one so large, in fact, that it was seldom booked except by directors of the

line, and on most voyages, the chief purser admitted, was given to those he

wished to honor. (My wife was adept in achieving such small advantages,

first impressing the impressionable with her chic and my celebrity and,

superiority once firmly established, changing quickly to a pose of almost

flirtatious affability.) In token of her appreciation the chief purser had been

asked to our party and he, in token of his appreciation, had sent before him

the life-size effigy of a swan, molded in ice and filled with caviar. This

chilly piece of magnificence now dominated the room, standing on a table

in the center, thawing gently, dripping at the beak into its silver dish. The

flowers of the morning delivery hid as much as possible of the paneling (for

this room was a miniature of the monstrous hall above).

我们得到了一套大房间，没有花更多的钱，事实上，这是如此之

大，以至于除了航线的主管之外，很少有人预订，而且在大多数航行

中，乘务长承认，都是给那些他希望尊敬的人。（我的妻子善于实现

这种小小的优势，首先用她的时髦和我的名气给易受影响的人留下深

刻印象，一旦牢固地确立了优越感，就会迅速转变为一种近乎轻浮的

和蔼可亲的姿势。为了表示感谢，乘务长被邀请到我们一行，为了表

示感谢，他把一只真人大小的天鹅雕像送到了他面前，用冰塑造，里

面装满了鱼子酱。这块冰冷的壮丽现在占据了整个房间，站在中央的

桌子上，轻轻地解冻，从喙滴入它的银色盘子里。早上送来的鲜花尽

可能地隐藏了镶板（因为这个房间是上面可怕大厅的缩影）。

“You must get dressed at once. Where have you been all this time?”

“你必须马上穿好衣服。这段时间你都去哪儿了？

“Talking to Julia Mottram.”

“和茱莉亚·莫特拉姆（Julia Mottram）交谈。”

“D’you know her? Oh, of course, you were a friend of the dipso brother.

Goodness, her glamour!”

“你认识她吗？哦，当然，你是迪普索兄弟的朋友。天哪，她的魅

力！

“She greatly admires your looks, too.”

“她也非常欣赏你的容貌。”

“She used to be a girl friend of Boy’s.”

“她曾经是男孩的女朋友。”

“Surely not?”

“肯定不是吗？”

“He always said so.”

“他总是这么说。”

“Have you considered,” I asked, “how your guests are going to eat this

caviar?”

“你有没有想过，”我问，“你的客人要怎么吃这个鱼子酱？

“I have. It’s insoluble. But there’s all this”—she revealed some trays of

glassy titbits—“and anyway, people always find ways of eating things at

parties. D’you remember we once ate potted shrimps with a paper knife?”

“我有。它是不可溶的。但这一切就是这样，“她拿出几盘玻璃，”

无论如何，人们总是想方设法在聚会上吃东西。你还记得我们曾经用

纸刀吃过盆栽虾吗？

“Did we?”

“是吗？”

“Darling, it was the night you popped the question.”

“亲爱的，就是你提出这个问题的那天晚上。”

“As I remember, you popped.”

“我记得，你爆了。”

“Well, the night we got engaged. But you haven’t said how you like the

arrangements.”

“嗯，我们订婚的那天晚上。但你还没有说你喜欢这些安排。

The arrangements, apart from the swan and the flowers, consisted of a

steward already inextricably trapped in the corner behind an improvised bar,

and another steward, tray in hand, in comparative freedom.

除了天鹅和鲜花之外，这些安排还包括一个管家已经不可避免地被

困在一个临时酒吧后面的角落里，而另一个管家手里拿着托盘，相对

自由。

“A cinema actor’s dream,” I said.

“电影演员的梦想，”我说。

“Cinema actors,” said my wife; “that’s what I want to talk about.”

“电影演员，”我妻子说;“这就是我想谈的。”

She came with me to my dressing-room and talked while I changed. It

had occurred to her that, with my interest in architecture, my true métier

was designing scenery for the films, and she had asked two Hollywood

magnates to the party with whom she wished to ingratiate me.

她和我一起来到我的更衣室，在我换衣服的时候聊天。她突然想

到，由于我对建筑的兴趣，我真正的职业是为电影设计布景，她邀请

了两位好莱坞大亨参加派对，她想讨好我。

We returned to the sitting-room.

我们回到了客厅。

“Darling, I believe you’ve taken against my bird. Don’t be beastly about

it in front of the purser. It was sweet of him to think of it. Besides, you

know, if you had read about it in the description of a sixteenth-century

banquet in Venice, you would have said those were the days to live.”

“亲爱的，我相信你已经对付了我的鸟。不要在乘务长面前大发雷

霆。想到这里，他真是太甜蜜了。此外，你知道，如果你在十六世纪

威尼斯宴会的描述中读到它，你会说那是生活的日子。

“In sixteenth-century Venice it would have been a somewhat different

shape.”

“在16世纪的威尼斯，它的形状会有所不同。

“Here is Father Christmas. We were just in raptures over your swan.”

“这是圣诞老人。我们只是为你的天鹅而狂喜。

The chief purser came into the room and shook hands, powerfully.

乘务长走进房间，有力地握了握手。

“Dear Lady Celia,” he said, “if you’ll put on your warmest clothes and

come on an expedition into the cold storage with me tomorrow, I can show

you a whole Noah’s Ark of such objects. The toast will be along in a

minute. They’re keeping it hot.”

“亲爱的西莉亚夫人，”他说，“如果你明天穿上最暖和的衣服，和

我一起去冷藏库探险，我可以带你去看一整套诺亚方舟。敬酒将在一

分钟内进行。他们让它保持热度。

“Toast!” said my wife, as though this was something beyond the dreams

of gluttony. “Do you hear that, Charles? Toast.”

“干杯！”我妻子说，仿佛这是贪吃的梦想之外的事情。“你听到了

吗，查尔斯？干杯。

Soon the guests began to arrive; there was nothing to delay them.

“Celia,” they said, “what a grand cabin and what a beautiful swan!” and, for

all that it was one of the largest in the ship, our room was soon painfully

crowded; they began to put out their cigarettes in the little pool of ice-water

which now surrounded the swan.

很快，客人开始到来;没有什么可以耽误他们的。“西莉亚，”他们

说，“多么宏伟的船舱，多么美丽的天鹅！”尽管它是船上最大的船舱

之一，但我们的房间很快就拥挤得令人痛苦。他们开始在现在包围天

鹅的冰水池里熄灭香烟。

The purser made a sensation, as sailors like to do, by predicting a storm.

“How can you be so beastly?” asked my wife, conveying the flattering

suggestion that not only the cabin and the caviar, but the waves, too, were at

his command. “Anyway, storms don’t affect a ship like this, do they?”

乘务长像水手们喜欢做的那样，通过预测暴风雨而引起轰动。“你

怎么能这么野兽？”我妻子问道，传达了一种谄媚的暗示，不仅船舱和

鱼子酱，而且海浪也听命于他。“不管怎么说，暴风雨不会影响这样的

船，不是吗？”

“Might hold us back a bit.”

“可能会拖累我们一点。”

“But it wouldn’t make us sick?”

“但这不会让我们生病吗？”

“Depends if you’re a good sailor. I’m always sick in storms, ever since I

was a boy.”

“这取决于你是否是一个好水手。从我还是个孩子的时候起，我总

是在暴风雨中生病。

“I don’t believe it. He’s just being sadistic. Come over here, there’s

something I want to show you.”

“我不相信。他只是在虐待狂。过来，我有件事想给你看。

It was the latest photograph of her children. “Charles hasn’t even seen

Caroline yet. Isn’t it thrilling for him?”

这是她孩子的最新照片。“查尔斯甚至还没有见过卡罗琳。对他来

说，这难道不令人兴奋吗？

There were no friends of mine there, but I knew about a third of the

party, and talked away civilly enough. An elderly woman said to me, “So

you’re Charles. I feel I know you through and through, Celia’s talked so

much about you.”

那里没有我的朋友，但我认识大约三分之一的人，并且很有礼貌地

交谈。一位老妇人对我说：“所以你是查尔斯。我觉得我对你了如指

掌，西莉亚说了很多关于你的事。

“Through and through,” I thought. “Through and through is a long way,

madam. Can you indeed see into those dark places where my own eyes seek

in vain to guide me? Can you tell me, dear Mrs. Stuyvesant Oglander—if I

am correct in thinking that is how I heard my wife speak of you—why it is

that at this moment, while I talk to you, here, about my forthcoming

exhibition, I am thinking all the time only of when Julia will come? Why

can I talk like this to you, but not to her? Why have I already set her apart

from humankind, and myself with her? What is going on in those secret

places of my spirit with which you make so free? What is cooking, Mrs.

Stuyvesant Oglander?”

“彻头彻尾，”我想。“彻头彻尾的路很长，夫人。你真的能看到那

些我亲眼徒劳地寻找指引我的黑暗地方吗？亲爱的史蒂文森·奥格兰德

夫人，你能告诉我吗——如果我是这样想的，我听到我妻子是这样说

你的——为什么此时此刻，当我在这里和你谈论我即将举行的展览

时，我总是只想着朱莉娅什么时候来？为什么我可以这样对你说话，

却不能对她说话？为什么我已经把她从人类中分离出来，而我自己和

她分开了？在我灵的那些秘密地方，你如此自由地发生了什么？什么

是烹饪，史岱文森·奥格兰德夫人？

Still Julia did not come, and the noise of twenty people in that tiny

room, which was so large that no one hired it, was the noise of a multitude.

茱莉亚仍然没有来，在那个小房间里，二十个人的喧嚣，太大了，

没有人雇用它，是一群人的喧嚣。

Then I saw a curious thing. There was a little red-headed man whom no

one seemed to know, a dowdy fellow quite unlike the general run of my

wife’s guests; he had been standing by the caviar for twenty minutes eating

as fast as a rabbit. Now he wiped his mouth with his handkerchief and, on

the impulse apparently, leaned forward and dabbed the beak of the swan,

removing the drop of water that had been swelling there and would soon

have fallen. Then he looked round furtively to see if he had been observed,

caught my eye, and giggled nervously.

然后我看到了一件奇怪的事情。有一个红头发的小男人，似乎没人

认识，一个老气横秋的家伙，与我妻子的一般客人完全不同;他在鱼子

酱旁站了二十分钟，吃得像兔子一样快。现在他用手帕擦了擦嘴，显

然是一时冲动，向前倾身，轻拍天鹅的喙，把那滴水滴移开，水滴已

经在那里膨胀了，很快就会掉下来。然后他偷偷地环顾四周，看看他

是否被观察到，引起了我的注意，并紧张地咯咯笑了起来。

“Been wanting to do that for a long time,” he said. “Bet you don’t know

how many drops to the minute. I do, I counted.”

“长期以来一直想这样做，”他说。“打赌你不知道每分钟有多少

滴。我数了数。

“I’ve no idea.”

“我不知道。”

“Guess. Tanner if you’re wrong; half a dollar if you’re right. That’s fair.”

“猜猜看。如果你错了，就去晒黑;如果你是对的，半美元。这很公

平。

“Three,” I said.

“三，”我说。

“Coo, you’re a sharp one. Been counting ’em yourself.” But he showed

no inclination to pay this debt. Instead he said: “How d’you figure this out.

I’m an Englishman born and bred, but this is my first time on the Atlantic.”

“咕咕，你是个敏锐的人。你自己一直在数他们。但他没有表现出

偿还这笔债务的意愿。相反，他说：“你是怎么弄清楚的。我是一个土

生土长的英国人，但这是我第一次在大西洋上。

“You flew out perhaps?”

“你飞出去了？”

“No, nor over it.”

“不，也不在它上面。”

“Then I presume you went round the world and came across the

Pacific.”

“那么我猜你环游世界，横渡太平洋。

“You are a sharp one and no mistake. I’ve made quite a bit getting into

arguments over that one.”

“你是一个敏锐的人，没有错。我为此争论不休。

“What was your route?” I asked, wishing to be agreeable.

“你的路线是什么？”我问道，希望能同意。

“Ah, that’d be telling. Well, I must skedaddle. So long.”

“啊，这很能说明问题。好吧，我必须溜冰。这么久了。

“Charles,” said my wife, “this is Mr. Kramm, of Interastral Films.”

“查尔斯，”我妻子说，“这是星际电影公司的克拉姆先生。

“So you are Mr. Charles Ryder,” said Mr. Kramm.

“所以你是查尔斯·莱德先生，”克拉姆先生说。

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Well, well, well,” he paused. I waited. “The purser here says we’re

heading for dirty weather. What d’you know about that?”

“好吧，好吧，好吧，”他停顿了一下。我等着。“这里的乘务长说

我们正走向肮脏的天气。你知道什么？

“Far less than the purser.”

“比乘务长少得多。”

“Pardon me, Mr. Ryder, I don’t quite get you.”

“请原谅我，莱德先生，我不太明白你。”

“I mean I know less than the purser.”

“我的意思是，我知道的比乘务长还少。”

“Is that so? Well, well, well. I’ve enjoyed our talk very much. I hope that

it will be the first of many.”

“是这样吗？好吧，好吧，好吧。我非常喜欢我们的谈话。我希望

这将是众多中的第一个。

An Englishwoman said: “Oh, that swan! Six weeks in America has

given me an absolute phobia of ice. Do tell me, how did it feel meeting

Celia again after two years? I know I should feel indecently bridal. But

Celia’s never quite got the orange blossom out of her hair, has she?”

一个英国女人说：“哦，那只天鹅！在美国呆了六个星期，让我对

冰有一种绝对的恐惧症。告诉我，两年后再次见到西莉亚是什么感

觉？我知道我应该感到不雅的新娘。但是西莉亚从来没把橙花从头发

上弄下来，是吗？

Another woman said: “Isn’t it heaven saying good-bye and knowing we

shall meet again in half an hour and go on meeting every half-hour for

days?”

“另一个女人说：”难道不是上天说再见，知道我们会在半小时后再

次见面，并且连续几天每半小时见面一次吗？

Our guests began to go, and each on leaving informed me of something

my wife had promised to bring me to in the near future; it was the theme of

the evening that we should all be seeing a lot of each other, that we had

formed one of those molecular systems that physicists can illustrate. At last

the swan was wheeled out, too, and I said to my wife, “Julia never came.”

我们的客人开始走了，每个人在离开时都告诉我，我妻子答应在不

久的将来带我去。当晚的主题是，我们都应该看到很多彼此，我们已

经形成了物理学家可以说明的分子系统之一。最后，天鹅也被赶了出

去，我对妻子说：“茱莉亚从来没来过。

“No, she telephoned. I couldn’t hear what she said, there was such a

noise going on—something about a dress. Quite lucky really, there wasn’t

room for a cat. It was a lovely party, wasn’t it? Did you hate it very much?

You behaved beautifully and looked so distinguished. Who was your red-

haired chum?”

“不，她打来了电话。我听不见她说什么，有这么大的响声——一

件衣服。真的很幸运，没有空间养猫。这是一个可爱的派对，不是

吗？你很讨厌它吗？你表现得很漂亮，看起来很出众。谁是你的红头

发的傻瓜？

“No chum of mine.”

“不是我的傻瓜。”

“How very peculiar! Did you say anything to Mr. Kramm about working

in Hollywood?”

“真是太奇特了！你有没有跟克拉姆先生说过在好莱坞工作的事

情？

“Of course not.”

“当然不是。”

“Oh, Charles, you are a worry to me. It’s not enough just to stand about

looking distinguished and a martyr for Art. Let’s go to dinner. We’re at the

Captain’s table. I don’t suppose he’ll dine down tonight, but it’s polite to be

fairly punctual.”

“哦，查尔斯，你让我很担心。仅仅站着看起来杰出和艺术的殉道

者是不够的。我们去吃晚饭吧。我们在船长的桌子上。我不认为他今

晚会吃饭，但守时是礼貌的。

By the time that we reached the table the rest of the party had arranged

themselves. On either side of the Captain’s empty chair sat Julia and Mrs.

Stuyvesant Oglander; besides them there was an English diplomat and his

wife, Senator Stuyvesant Oglander, and an American clergyman at present

totally isolated between two pairs of empty chairs. This clergyman later

described himself—redundantly it seemed—as an Episcopalian Bishop.

Husbands and wives sat together here. My wife was confronted with a

quick decision, and although the steward attempted to direct us otherwise,

sat so that she had the senator and I the Bishop. Julia gave us both a little

dismal signal of sympathy.

当我们走到餐桌前时，聚会的其他人已经安排好了自己。在上尉空

椅子的两边坐着朱莉娅和史岱文森特·奥格兰德夫人;除了他们之外，还

有一位英国外交官和他的妻子，参议员史岱文森·奥格兰德，以及一位

美国神职人员，目前完全孤立在两对空椅子之间。这位神职人员后来

将自己描述为圣公会主教，这似乎是多余的。丈夫和妻子坐在一起。

我的妻子面临着一个快速的决定，尽管管家试图指示我们不要这样

做，但她坐着，让她让参议员和我作为主教。茱莉亚给了我们俩一点

令人沮丧的同情信号。

“I’m miserable about the party,” she said, “my beastly maid totally

disappeared with every dress I have. She only turned up half an hour ago.

She’d been playing ping-pong.”

“我对派对很痛苦，”她说，“我的野兽女仆在我穿的每一件衣服上

都完全消失了。她半小时前才出现。她一直在打乒乓球。

“I’ve been telling the Senator what he missed,” said Mrs. Stuyvesant

Oglander. “Wherever Celia is, you’ll find she knows all the significant

people.”

“我一直在告诉参议员他错过了什么，”史蒂文森特·奥格兰德夫人

说。“无论西莉亚在哪里，你都会发现她认识所有重要的人。

“On my right,” said the Bishop, “a significant couple are expected. They

take all their meals in their cabin except when they have been informed in

advance that the Captain will be present.”

“在我的右边，”主教说，“预计会有一对重要的夫妇。他们所有的

饭菜都在自己的船舱里吃，除非他们事先被告知船长会在场。

We were a gruesome circle; even my wife’s high social spirit faltered. At

moments I heard bits of her conversation.

我们是一个可怕的圈子;就连我妻子的崇高社会精神也动摇了。有

一会儿，我听到了她谈话的片段。

“… an extraordinary little red-haired man. Captain Foulenough in

person.”

"...一个非凡的红发小个子。福尔纳船长本人。

“But I understood you to say, Lady Celia, that you were unacquainted

with him.”

“但我理解你是这么说的，西莉亚夫人，你和他不相识。

“I meant he was like Captain Foulenough.”

“我是说他就像福纳夫上尉一样。”

“I begin to comprehend. He impersonated this friend of yours in order to

come to your party.”

“我开始理解了。他冒充你的这个朋友来参加你的聚会。

“No, no. Captain Foulenough is simply a comic character.”

“不，不。Foulenough船长简直就是一个喜剧人物。

“There seems to have been nothing very amusing about this other man.

Your friend is a comedian?”

“这个人似乎没什么好笑的。你的朋友是喜剧演员吗？

“No, no. Captain Foulenough is an imaginary character in an English

paper. You know, like your “Popeye”.”

“不，不。福利诺船长是英文报纸上的一个虚构人物。你知道，就

像你的“大力水手”一样。

The senator laid down knife and fork. “To recapitulate: an imposter

came to your party and you admitted him because of a fancied resemblance

to a fictitious character in a cartoon.”

参议员放下刀叉。“概括一下：一个冒名顶替者来到你的聚会上，

你承认了他，因为他与卡通片中的虚构人物有相似之处。”

“Yes, I suppose that was it really.”

“是的，我想真的是这样。”

The senator looked at his wife as much as to say: “Significant people,

huh!”

参议员看着他的妻子，好像在说：“重要的人，呵呵！

I heard Julia across the table trying to trace, for the benefit of the

diplomat, the marriage-connections of her Hungarian and Italian cousins.

The diamonds flashed in her hair and on her fingers, but her hands were

nervously rolling little balls of crumb, and her starry head drooped in

despair.

我听到桌子对面的茱莉亚试图为了外交官的利益，追踪她的匈牙利

和意大利表亲的婚姻关系。钻石在她的头发和手指上闪闪发光，但她

的手却紧张地滚动着小碎屑球，她满天星光的脑袋绝望地垂下。

The Bishop told me of the goodwill mission on which he was travelling

to Barcelona…“a very, very valuable work of clearance has been

performed, Mr. Ryder. The time has now come to rebuild on broader

foundations. I have made it my aim to reconcile the so-called Anarchists

and the so-called Communists, and with that in view I and my committee

have digested all the available documentation of the subject. Our

conclusion, Mr. Ryder, is unanimous. There is no fundamental diversity

between the two ideologies. It is a matter of personalities, Mr. Ryder, and

what personalities have put asunder personalities can unite…”

主教告诉我，他要去巴塞罗那执行的友好任务......“莱德先生，已经

进行了非常非常有价值的清理工作。现在是在更广泛的基础上进行重

建的时候了。我的目标是调和所谓的无政府主义者和所谓的共产主义

者，为此，我和我的委员会已经消化了所有关于这个问题的现有文

件。莱德先生，我们的结论是一致的。这两种意识形态之间没有根本

的多样性。莱德先生，这是一个性格问题，性格所压制的是什么，性

格可以团结起来......”

On the other side I heard: “And may I make so bold as to ask what

institutions sponsored your husband’s expedition?”

在另一边，我听到：“我可以大胆地问问是什么机构赞助了你丈夫

的探险吗？

The diplomat’s wife bravely engaged the Bishop across the gulf that

separated them.

这位外交官的妻子勇敢地与主教隔着隔开的鸿沟与主教交战。

“And what language will you speak when you get to Barcelona?”

“当你到达巴塞罗那时，你会说什么语言？”

“The language of Reason and Brotherhood, madam,” and, turning back

to me, “The speech of the coming century is in thoughts not in words. Do

you not agree, Mr. Ryder?”

“理性和兄弟情谊的语言，夫人，”然后，转过身来对我说，“下个

世纪的演讲是在思想中，而不是在言语中。你不同意吗，莱德先生？”

“Yes,” I said. “Yes.”

“是的，”我说。“是的。”

“What are words?” said the Bishop.

“什么是言语？”主教说。

“What indeed?”

“到底是什么？”

“Mere conventional symbols, Mr. Ryder, and this is an age rightly

skeptical of conventional symbols.”

“莱德先生，这只是一个传统的符号，这是一个对传统符号持怀疑

态度的时代。

My mind reeled; after the parrot-house fever of my wife’s party, and

unplumbed emotions of the afternoon, after all the exertions of my wife’s

pleasures in New York, after the months of solitude in the steaming, green

shadows of the jungle, this was too much. I felt like Lear on the heath, like

the Duchess of Malfi bayed by madmen. I summoned cataracts and

hurricanoes, and as if by conjury the call was immediately answered.

我的思绪摇晃着;在我妻子的派对上鹦鹉屋的狂热之后，在下午的

情绪失控之后，在我妻子在纽约的所有快乐之后，在丛林中热气腾腾

的绿色阴影中孤独了几个月之后，这太过分了。我感觉自己就像荒原

上的李尔王，就像被疯子殴打的马尔菲公爵夫人。我召唤了白内障和

飓风，仿佛被召唤了一样，电话立即得到了回应。

For some time now, though whether it was a mere trick of the nerves I

did not then know, I had felt a recurrent and persistently growing motion—a

heave and shudder of the large dining-room as of the breast of a man in

deep sleep. Now my wife turned to me and said: “Either I am a little drunk

or it’s getting rough,” and, even as she spoke we found ourselves leaning

sideways in our chairs; there was a crash and tinkle of falling cutlery by the

wall, and on our table the wine glasses all together toppled and rolled over,

while each of us steadied the plates and forks and looked at the other with

expressions that varied between frank horror in the diplomat’s wife and

relief in Julia.

有一段时间了，虽然我当时还不知道这是否仅仅是神经的把戏，但

我感觉到一种反复的、持续增长的运动——大餐厅的起伏和颤抖，就

像一个熟睡的男人的胸膛一样。现在，我的妻子转过身来对我说：“要

么我有点醉了，要么天气变硬了，”就在她说话的时候，我们发现自己

侧身靠在椅子上;墙边的餐具掉落发出咔嚓咔嚓的响声，我们桌上的酒

杯一起翻倒，我们每个人都稳住盘子和叉子，看着对方，表情在外交

官妻子坦率的恐惧和朱莉娅的宽慰之间变化。

The gale which, unheard, unseen, unfelt, in our enclosed and insulated

world had, for an hour, been mounting over us, had now veered and fallen

full on our bows.

在我们这个封闭和隔绝的世界里，闻所未闻、看不见、感觉不到的

狂风已经持续了一个小时，现在已经转向并完全落在我们的船头上。

Silence followed the crash, then a high, nervous babble of laughter.

Stewards laid napkins on the pools of spilt wine. We tried to resume the

conversation, but all were waiting, as the little ginger man had watched the

drop swell and fall from the swan’s beak, for the next great blow; it came,

heavier than the last.

坠机之后是一片寂静，然后是一阵高亢而紧张的笑声。管家们把餐

巾纸放在洒落的酒池上。我们试图继续谈话，但所有人都在等待，因

为小姜人已经看着水滴从天鹅的嘴里膨胀和落下，等待下一次巨大的

打击;它来了，比上一次更重。

“This is where I say good night to you all,” said the diplomat’s wife,

rising.

“这是我向你们所有人道晚安的地方，”外交官的妻子说，站起来。

Her husband led her to their cabin. The dining-room was emptying fast.

Soon only Julia, my wife, and I were left at the table, and, telepathically,

Julia said, “Like King Lear.”

她的丈夫把她带到了他们的小屋。餐厅很快就空了。很快，桌上只

剩下茱莉亚、我的妻子和我，茱莉亚心灵感应地说：“就像李尔王一

样。

“Only each of us is all three of them.”

“只有我们每个人都是他们三个人。”

“What can you mean?” asked my wife.

“你什么意思？”我妻子问。

“Lear, Kent, Fool.”

“李尔，肯特，傻瓜。”

“Oh, dear, it’s like that agonizing Foulenough conversation over again.

Don’t try and explain.”

“噢，亲爱的，这就像是一次又一次令人痛苦的Foulenough谈话。

不要试图解释。

“I doubt if I could,” I said.

“我怀疑我是否能做到，”我说。

Another climb, another vast drop. The stewards were at work making

things fast, shutting things up, hustling away unstable ornaments.

又一次攀登，又一次巨大的下降。管家们正在快速工作，把东西关

起来，忙着收拾不稳定的装饰品。

“Well, we’ve finished dinner and set a fine example of British phlegm,”

said my wife. “Let’s go and see what’s on.”

“嗯，我们已经吃完晚饭了，树立了英国痰的好榜样，”我妻子说。

“我们去看看发生了什么。”

Once, on our way to the lounge, we had all three to cling to a pillar;

when we got there we found it almost deserted; the band played but no one

danced; the tables were set for tombola but no one bought a card, and the

ship’s officer, who made a speciality of calling the numbers with all the

patter of the lower deck—“sweet sixteen and never been kissed—key of the

door, twenty-one—clickety-click, sixty-six”—was idly talking to his

colleagues; there were a score of scattered novel readers, a few games of

bridge, some brandy drinking in the smoking-room, but all our guests of

two hours before had disappeared.

有一次，在去休息室的路上，我们三个人都紧紧抓住一根柱子;当

我们到达那里时，我们发现它几乎空无一人;乐队演奏，但没有人跳

舞;桌子上摆好了汤博拉的桌子，但没人买卡，船上的军官，他擅长用

下层甲板上所有的咔嚓声拨打号码——“甜蜜的十六岁，从未被亲吻过

——门的钥匙，二十一——咔嚓咔嚓，六十六”——正在闲聊他的同

事;有几十个零散的小说读者，几场桥牌游戏，一些在吸烟室里喝白兰

地，但两个小时前的所有客人都消失了。

The three of us sat for a little by the empty dance floor; my wife was full

of schemes by which, without impoliteness, we could move to another table

in the dining-room. “It’s crazy to go to the restaurant,” she said, “and pay

extra for exactly the same dinner. Only film people go there, anyway. I

don’t see why we should be made to.”

我们三个人在空荡荡的舞池边坐了一会儿;我的妻子充满了计划，

通过这些计划，我们可以不礼貌地搬到餐厅的另一张桌子上。“去餐厅

真是太疯狂了，”她说，“还为一模一样的晚餐多付钱。反正只有电影

人去那里。我不明白为什么我们应该这样做。

Presently she said: “It’s making my head ache and I’m tired, anyway.

I’m going to bed.”

现在她说：“这让我头疼，反正我很累。我要上床睡觉了。

Julia went with her. I walked round the ship, on one of the covered

decks where the wind howled and the spray leaped up from the darkness

and smashed white and brown against the glass screen; men were posted to

keep the passengers off the open decks. Then I, too, went below.

茱莉亚和她一起去了。我绕着船走了一圈，在有盖的甲板上，风呼

啸着，浪花从黑暗中跳起来，把白色和棕色砸在玻璃屏风上;有人被派

去让乘客远离露天甲板。然后我也去了下面。

In my dressing-room everything breakable had been stowed away, the

door to the cabin was hooked open, and my wife called plaintively from

within.

在我的更衣室里，所有易碎的东西都被收起来了，小屋的门被勾开

了，我的妻子在里面哀怨地叫道。

“I feel terrible. I didn’t know a ship of this size could pitch like this,”

she said, and her eyes were full of consternation and resentment, like those

of a woman who, at the end of her time, at length realizes that however

luxurious the nursing home, and however well paid the doctor, her labor is

inevitable; and the lift and fall of the ship came regularly as the pains of

childbirth.

“我感觉很糟糕。我不知道这么大的船能这样俯仰，“她说，她的眼

睛里充满了惊愕和怨恨，就像一个女人的眼睛，在她的时间结束时，

她终于意识到，无论疗养院多么豪华，无论医生的薪水多么高，她的

劳动都是不可避免的;船的升降经常像分娩的痛苦一样出现。

I slept next door; or, rather, I lay there between dreaming and waking. In

a narrow bunk, on a hard mattress, there might have been rest, but here the

beds were broad and buoyant; I collected what cushions I could find and

tried to wedge myself firm, but through the night I turned with each swing

and twist of the ship—she was rolling now as well as pitching—and my

head rang with the creak and thud.

我睡在隔壁;或者，更确切地说，我躺在梦境和清醒之间。在狭窄

的铺位上，在坚硬的床垫上，本来可以休息，但这里的床又宽又浮;我

收集了我能找到的垫子，并试图把自己楔紧，但整个晚上，我随着船

的每一次摆动和扭曲而转身——她现在在滚动和俯仰——我的头随着

吱吱作响和砰砰声响起。

Once, an hour before dawn, my wife appeared like a ghost in the

doorway, supporting herself with either hand on the jambs, saying: “Are

you awake? Can’t you do something? Can’t you get something from the

doctor?”

有一次，天亮前一个小时，我的妻子像幽灵一样出现在门口，用一

只手撑在门框上，说：“你醒了吗？你不能做点什么吗？你不能从医生

那里得到一些东西吗？

I rang for the night steward, who had a draught ready prepared, which

comforted her a little.

我打电话给夜班管家，他已经准备好了草稿，这让她感到一点安

慰。

And all night between dreaming and waking I thought of Julia; in my

brief dreams she took a hundred fantastic and terrible and obscene forms,

but in my waking thoughts she returned with her sad, starry head just as I

had seen her at dinner.

在做梦和醒来之间，我整晚都在想朱莉娅;在我短暂的梦中，她呈

现出一百种奇妙、可怕和淫秽的形式，但在我清醒的思绪中，她带着

悲伤的、星光灿烂的头回来了，就像我在晚餐时看到她一样。

After first light I slept for an hour or two, then awoke clear-headed, with a

joyous sense of anticipation.

天亮后，我睡了一两个小时，然后醒来时头脑清醒，充满期待。

The wind had dropped a little, the steward told me, but was still blowing

hard and there was a very heavy swell; “which there’s nothing worse than a

heavy swell,” he said, “for the enjoyment of the passengers. There’s not

many breakfasts wanted this morning.”

管家告诉我，风力下降了一点，但仍然吹得很厉害，而且海浪很

大;“没有什么比大浪更糟糕的了，”他说，“为了乘客的享受。今天早

上想要的早餐不多。

I looked in at my wife, found her sleeping, and closed the door between

us; then I ate salmon kedgeree and cold Bradenham ham and telephoned for

a barber to come and shave me.

我看了看我的妻子，发现她睡着了，然后关上了我们之间的门;然

后我吃了鲑鱼kedgeree和冷的Bradenham火腿，并打电话让理发师来给

我刮胡子。

“There’s a lot of stuff in the sitting-room for the lady,” said the steward;

“shall I leave it for the time?”

“客厅里有很多东西供女士使用，”管家说;“我暂时不说好吗？”

I went to see. There was a second delivery of cellophane parcels from

the shops on board, some ordered by radio from friends in New York whose

secretaries had failed to remind them of our departure in time, some by our

guests as they left the cocktail party. It was no day for flower vases; I told

him to leave them on the floor and then, struck by the thought, removed the

card from Mr. Kramm’s roses and sent them with my love to Julia.

我去看了看。船上的商店又送来了玻璃纸包裹，有些是纽约的朋友

通过无线电订购的，他们的秘书没有及时提醒他们我们离开了，有些

是我们的客人在离开鸡尾酒会时订购的。这不是花瓶的日子;我告诉他

把它们放在地板上，然后，被这个想法打动了，从克拉姆先生的玫瑰

花上取下了卡片，把它们和我的爱一起送给了朱莉娅。

She telephoned while I was being shaved.

她在我剃光头的时候打电话。

“What a deplorable thing to do, Charles! How unlike you!”

“查尔斯，这是多么可悲的事情啊！和你真不一样！

“Don’t you like them?”

“你不喜欢他们吗？”

“What can I do with roses on a day like this?”

“在这样的日子里，我能用玫瑰做什么？”

“Smell them.”

“闻闻它们。”

There was a pause and a rustle of unpacking. “They’ve absolutely no

smell at all.”

停顿了一下，开箱的沙沙声传来。“他们完全没有气味。”

“What have you had for breakfast?”

“你早餐吃了什么？”

“Muscat grapes and cantaloupe.”

“麝香葡萄和哈密瓜。”

“When shall I see you?”

“我什么时候能见到你？”

“Before lunch. I’m busy till then with a masseuse.”

“午饭前。在那之前，我一直忙于按摩师。

“A masseuse?”

“按摩师？”

“Yes, isn’t it peculiar? I’ve never had one before, except once when I

hurt my shoulder hunting. What is it about being on a boat that makes

everyone behave like a film star?”

“是啊，是不是很奇怪？我以前从未有过，除了有一次我在狩猎时

伤了肩膀。在一艘船上，让每个人都表现得像电影明星，这是什么？

“I don’t.”

“我没有。”

“How about these very embarrassing roses?”

“这些非常尴尬的玫瑰怎么样？”

The barber did his work with extraordinary dexterity—indeed, with

agility, for he stood like a swordsman in a ballet sometimes on the point of

one foot, sometimes on the other, lightly flicking the lather off his blade,

and swooping back to my chin as the ship righted herself; I should not have

dared use a safety razor on myself.

理发师以非凡的灵巧——事实上，敏捷地完成了他的工作，因为他

像芭蕾舞中的剑客一样站着，有时站在一只脚尖上，有时站在另一只

脚尖上，轻轻地弹掉刀刃上的泡沫，然后随着船的摆正而猛地回到我

的下巴上;我不应该在自己身上使用安全剃须刀。

The telephone rang again.

电话又响了。

It was my wife.

那是我的妻子。

“How are you, Charles?”

“你好吗，查尔斯？”

“Tired.”

“累了。”

“Aren’t you coming to see me?”

“你不是来看我的吗？”

“I came once. I’ll be in again.”

“我来过一次。我会再来的。

I brought her the flowers from the sitting-room; they completed the

atmosphere of a maternity ward which she had managed to create in the

cabin; the stewardess had the air of a midwife, standing by the bed, a pillar

of starched linen and composure. My wife turned her head on the pillow

and smiled wanly; she stretched out a bare arm and caressed with the tips of

her fingers the cellophane and silk ribbons of the largest bouquet. “How

sweet people are,” she said faintly, as though the gale were a private

misfortune of her own for which the world in its love was condoling with

her.

我从客厅里给她拿来了鲜花;他们完成了她在小屋里设法营造的产

科病房的氛围;空姐有一种助产士的气息，站在床边，一根上浆的亚麻

布柱子，镇定自若。妻子把头靠在枕头上，妩媚地笑了笑;她伸出一只

裸露的手臂，用指尖抚摸着最大花束的玻璃纸和丝带。“人是多么甜蜜

啊，”她淡淡地说，仿佛大风是她自己的不幸，全世界都在为她哀悼。

“I take it you’re not getting up.”

“我看你还没起床。”

“Oh no, Mrs. Clark is being so sweet”; she was always quick to get

servants’ names. “Don’t bother. Come in sometimes and tell me what’s

going on.”

“哦，不，克拉克太太太可爱了”;她总是很快得到仆人的名字。“别

打扰了。有时进来告诉我发生了什么事。

“Now, now, dear,” said the stewardess, “the less we are disturbed today

the better.”

“现在，现在，亲爱的，”空姐说，“我们今天被打扰得越少越好。

My wife seemed to make a sacred, female rite even of seasickness.

我的妻子似乎把晕船当作一种神圣的女性仪式。

Julia’s cabin, I knew, was somewhere below ours. I waited for her by the

lift on the main deck; when she came we walked once round the

promenade; I held the rail; she took my other arm. It was hard going;

through the streaming glass we saw a distorted world of gray sky and black

water. When the ship rolled heavily I swung her round so that she could

hold the rail with her other hand; the howl of the wind was subdued, but the

whole ship creaked with strain. We made the circuit once, then Julia said:

“It’s no good. That woman beat hell out of me, and I feel limp, anyway.

Let’s sit down.”

我知道，茱莉亚的小屋在我们楼下的某个地方。我在主甲板的电梯

旁等她;当她来的时候，我们在长廊上走了一圈;我扶着栏杆;她握住了

我的另一只胳膊。这很艰难;透过流淌的玻璃，我们看到了一个灰色的

天空和黑色的水的扭曲世界。当船沉重地摇晃时，我把她转过身来，

这样她就可以用另一只手握住栏杆;风的呼啸声被压制住了，但整艘船

都紧张地吱吱作响。我们绕了一次路，然后朱莉娅说：“这不好。那个

女人把我打得一塌糊涂，反正我感觉软绵绵的。我们坐下吧。

The great bronze doors of the lounge had torn away from their hooks

and were swinging free with the roll of the ship; regularly and, it seemed,

irresistibly, first one, then the other, opened and shut; they paused at the

completion of each half circle, began to move slowly and finished fast with

a resounding clash. There was no real risk in passing them, except of

slipping and being caught by that swift, final blow; there was ample time to

walk through unhurried but there was something forbidding in the sight of

that great weight of uncontrolled metal, flapping to and fro, which might

have made a timid man flinch or skip through too quickly; I rejoiced to feel

Julia’s hand perfectly steady on my arm and know, as I walked beside her,

that she was wholly undismayed.

休息室的青铜大门已经从钩子上扯下来，随着船的摇晃而自由摆

动;有规律地，似乎不可抗拒地，先是一个，然后是另一个，打开和关

闭;他们在完成每个半圈时停下来，开始缓慢移动，并以响亮的冲突快

速结束。通过他们没有真正的风险，除了滑倒并被那快速的最后一击

抓住;有充足的时间不紧不慢地走过去，但看到那不受控制的金属的巨

大重量，来回拍打，可能会让一个胆小的人退缩或跳过得太快;我很高

兴感觉到茱莉亚的手完全稳定地放在我的手臂上，当我走在她身边

时，我知道她完全没有惊慌失措。

“Bravo,” said a man sitting nearby. “I confess I went round the other

way. I didn’t like the look of those doors somehow. They’ve been trying to

fix them all the morning.”

“太棒了，”坐在附近的一个男人说。“我承认我走了另一条路。不

知何故，我不喜欢那些门的样子。他们整个上午都在试图修复它们。

There were few people about that day, and that few seemed bound

together by a camaraderie of reciprocal esteem; they did nothing except sit

rather glumly in their armchairs, drink occasionally, and exchange

congratulations on not being seasick.

那天人很少，而且似乎很少有人被相互尊重的友情联系在一起;他

们什么也没做，只是闷闷不乐地坐在扶手椅上，偶尔喝点酒，并祝贺

他们没有晕船。

“You’re the first lady I’ve seen,” said the man.

“你是我见过的第一夫人，”男人说。

“I’m very lucky.”

“我很幸运。”

“We are very lucky’ he said, with a movement which began as a bow

and ended as a lurch forward to his knees, as the blotting-paper floor dipped

steeply between us. The roll carried us away from him, clinging together

but still on our feet, and we quickly sat where our dance led us, on the

further side, in isolation; a web of life-lines had been stretched across the

lounge, and we seemed like boxers, roped into the ring.

“我们很幸运，”他说，他的一个动作从鞠躬开始，到膝盖前倾，因

为吸墨纸地板在我们之间陡峭地倾斜。那张卷子把我们从他身边带走

了，紧紧地抱在一起，但仍然站着，我们很快就坐在了我们的舞蹈带

领我们的地方，在另一边，孤立无援;一条生命线的网已经延伸到休息

室，我们看起来像拳击手，被绳索绑在擂台上。

The steward approached. “Your usual, sir? Whisky and tepid water, I

think. And for the lady? Might I suggest a nip of champagne?”

管家走了过来。“你平时，先生？我想是威士忌和温水。而那位女

士呢？我可以建议喝点香槟吗？

“D’you know, the awful thing is I would like champagne very much,”

said Julia. “What a life of pleasure—roses, half an hour with a female

pugilist, and now champagne!”

“你知道，可怕的是我非常喜欢香槟，”朱莉娅说。“多么快乐的生

活啊——玫瑰花，和女斗士在一起半小时，现在还有香槟！”

“I wish you wouldn’t go on about the roses. It wasn’t my idea in the first

place. Someone sent them to Celia.”

“我希望你不要继续谈论玫瑰。这本来就不是我的主意。有人把它

们送到了西莉亚那里。

“Oh, that’s quite different. It lets you out completely. But it makes my

massage worse.”

“哦，那完全不同。它让你完全脱身。但这让我的按摩变得更糟。

“I was shaved in bed.”

“我在床上被剃光了。”

“I’m glad about the roses,” said Julia. “Frankly, they were a shock. They

made me think we were starting the day on the wrong foot.”

“我为玫瑰感到高兴，”朱莉娅说。“坦率地说，他们令人震惊。他

们让我觉得我们开始了错误的一天。

I knew what she meant, and in that moment felt as though I had shaken

off some of the dust and grit of ten dry years; then and always, however she

spoke to me, in half sentences, single words, stock phrases of contemporary

jargon, in scarcely perceptible movements of eyes or lips or hands, however

inexpressible her thought, however quick and far it had glanced from the

matter in hand, however deep it had plunged, as it often did, straight from

the surface to the depths, I knew; even that day when I still stood on the

extreme verge of love, I knew what she meant.

我知道她的意思，在那一刻，我感觉自己好像甩掉了十年干旱岁月

的尘土和砂砾;从那时起，无论她如何对我说话，用半句话，一个词，

用当代行话的常用短语，用几乎察觉不到的眼睛、嘴唇或手的动作，

无论她的思想多么难以表达，无论它从手头的东西上瞥了多么快、多

么远，无论它像往常那样从表面直接跌入深处，我知道;甚至在那一

天，当我还站在爱情的极端边缘时，我也知道她的意思。

We drank our wine and soon our new friend came lurching towards us

down the life-line.

我们喝了酒，很快我们的新朋友就沿着生命线向我们走来。

“Mind if I join you? Nothing like a bit of rough weather for bringing

people together. This is my tenth crossing, and I’ve never seen anything like

it. I can see you are an experienced sailor, young lady.”

“介意我加入你吗？没有什么比恶劣的天气更能将人们聚集在一起

了。这是我第十次穿越，我从未见过这样的事情。我看得出来，你是

个有经验的水手，小姐。

“No. As a matter of fact, I’ve never been at sea before except coming to

New York and, of course, crossing the Channel. I don’t feel sick, thank

God, but I feel tired. I thought at first it was only the massage, but I’m

coming to the conclusion it’s the ship.”

“不。事实上，我以前从未出过海，除了来到纽约，当然还有穿越

英吉利海峡。谢天谢地，我不觉得恶心，但我感到疲倦。起初我以为

这只是按摩，但我得出的结论是，这是船。

“My wife’s in a terrible way. She’s an experienced sailor. Only shows,

doesn’t it?”

“我妻子的处境很糟糕。她是一位经验丰富的水手。只是表演，不

是吗？

He joined us at luncheon, and I did not mind his being there; he had

clearly taken a fancy to Julia, and he thought we were man and wife; this

misconception and his gallantry seemed in some way to bring her and me

closer together. “Saw you two last night at the Captain’s table,” he said,

“with all the nobs.”

他和我们一起吃午饭，我不介意他在那里;他显然看上了茱莉亚，

他以为我们是夫妻;这种误解和他的英勇似乎在某种程度上拉近了她和

我之间的距离。“昨晚在船长的餐桌上见到你们两个了，”他说，“和所

有的贵族在一起。

“Very dull nobs.”

“很沉闷的贵族。”

“If you ask me, nobs always are. When you get a storm like this you find

out what people are really made of.”

“如果你问我，贵族总是。当你遇到这样的风暴时，你就会发现人

们的真正构成。

“You have a predilection for good sailors?”

“你偏爱好水手吗？”

“Well, put like that I don’t know that I do—what I mean is, it makes for

getting together.”

“好吧，这么说吧，我不知道我是否知道——我的意思是，这让人

聚在一起。

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Take us for example. But for this we might never have met. I’ve had

some very romantic encounters at sea in my time. If the lady will excuse

me, I’d like to tell you about a little adventure I had in the Gulf of Lions

when I was younger than I am now.”

“以我们为例。但为此，我们可能永远不会见面。在我的时间里，

我在海上有过一些非常浪漫的邂逅。如果这位女士能原谅我，我想告

诉你我比现在年轻的时候在狮子湾的一次小冒险。

We were both weary; lack of sleep, the incessant din, and the strain

every movement required, wore us down. We spent that afternoon apart in

our cabins. I slept and when I awoke the sea was as high as ever, inky

clouds swept over us, and the glass streamed still with water, but I had

grown used to the storm in my sleep, had made its rhythm mine, had

become part of it, so that I arose strongly and confidently and found Julia

already up and in the same temper.

我们俩都很疲惫;睡眠不足，无休止的喧嚣，以及每个动作所需的

压力，都让我们疲惫不堪。那天下午，我们在小屋里分开度过了。我

睡着了，当我醒来时，海面一如既往地高，漆黑的云层笼罩着我们，

玻璃杯里还流着水，但我在睡梦中已经习惯了暴风雨，让它的节奏成

为我的节奏，成为它的一部分，所以我坚强而自信地站起来，发现朱

莉娅已经起床了，脾气也一样。

“What d’you think?” she said. “That man’s giving a little “get-together

party” tonight in the smoking-room for all the good sailors. He asked me to

bring my husband.”

“你怎么看？”她说。“那个人今晚在吸烟室里为所有优秀的水手们

举办了一个小小的'聚会'。他要我带上我的丈夫。

“Are we going?”

“我们要去吗？”

“Of course… I wonder if I ought to feel like the lady our friend met on

the way to Barcelona. I don’t, Charles, not a bit.”

“当然......我想知道我是否应该像我们的朋友在去巴塞罗那的路上遇

到的那位女士一样。我没有，查尔斯，一点也不。

There were eighteen people at the “get-together party”; we had nothing

in common except immunity from seasickness. We drank champagne, and

presently our host said: “Tell you what, I’ve got a roulette wheel. Trouble is

we can’t go to my cabin on account of the wife, and we aren’t allowed to

play in public.”

“聚会”有十八个人;除了对晕船的免疫力外，我们没有任何共同点。

我们喝了香槟，现在我们的主人说：“告诉你什么，我有一个轮盘赌。

麻烦的是，由于妻子的缘故，我们不能去我的小屋，而且我们不允许

在公共场合玩耍。

So the party adjourned to my sitting-room and we played for low stakes

until late into the night, when Julia left and our host had drunk too much

wine to be surprised that she and I were not in the same quarters. When all

but he had gone, he fell asleep in his chair, and I left him there. It was the

last I saw of him, for later—so the steward told me when he came from

returning the roulette things to the man’s cabin—he broke his thigh, falling

in the corridor, and was taken to the ship’s hospital.

于是，派对休会到我的客厅，我们玩得很低，直到深夜，朱莉娅离

开了，我们的主人喝了太多的酒，惊讶于她和我不在同一个宿舍。当

他一个人都走了，他在椅子上睡着了，我把他留在那里。这是我最后

一次见到他，因为后来——所以管家告诉我，当他把轮盘赌的东西放

回那个人的船舱时——他摔断了大腿，摔倒在走廊上，被送往船上的

医院。

All next day Julia and I spent together without interruption; talking,

scarcely moving, held in our chairs by the swell of the sea. After luncheon

the last hardy passengers went to rest and we were alone as though the

place had been cleared for us, as though tact on a titanic scale had sent

everyone tip-toeing out to leave us to one another.

接下来的一天，茱莉亚和我在一起度过了，没有受到干扰。说话，

几乎一动不动，坐在海浪旁的椅子上。午饭后，最后一批坚强的乘客

去休息了，我们独自一人，仿佛这个地方已经为我们清理干净了，仿

佛巨大的机智让每个人都踮起脚尖离开我们彼此。

The bronze doors of the lounge had been fixed, but not before two

seamen had been badly injured. They had tried various devices, lashing

with ropes and, later, when these failed, with steel hawsers, but there was

nothing to which they could be made fast; finally, they drove wooden

wedges under them, catching them in the brief moment of repose when they

were full open, and these held firm.

休息室的青铜门已经修好了，但还没有两名海员受重伤。他们尝试

了各种装置，用绳索绑扎，后来，当这些装置失败时，用钢制绳索，

但没有任何东西可以快速制造它们;最后，他们在它们下面打了木楔

子，在它们完全打开的短暂休息时刻抓住了它们，这些楔子牢牢地固

定住了。

When, before dinner, she went to her cabin to get ready (no one dressed

that night) and I came with her, uninvited, unopposed, expected, and behind

closed doors took her in my arms and first kissed her, there was no

alteration from the mood of the afternoon. Later, turning it over in my mind,

as I turned in my bed with the rise and fall of the ship, through the long,

lonely, drowsy night, I recalled the courtships of the past, dead, ten years;

how, knotting my tie before setting out, putting the gardenia in my

buttonhole, I would plan my evening and think at such and such a time, at

such and such an opportunity, I shall cross the start-line and open my attack

for better or worse; “this phase of the battle has gone on long enough,” I

would think; “a decision must be reached.” With Julia there were no phases,

no start-line, no tactics at all.

晚饭前，她去她的小屋准备（那天晚上没有人穿衣服），我和她一

起来，不请自来，不反对，不期而至，闭门造车，把她抱在怀里，第

一次吻她，下午的心情没有任何变化。后来，当我在床上翻来覆去地

听着船的起起落落时，在漫长的、孤独的、昏昏欲睡的夜晚，我回想

起过去的求爱，死了，十年;出发前打好领带，把栀子花放在扣眼里，

我打算计划我的夜晚，想着在某某时间，在某某机会，我会越过起跑

线，开始我的进攻，无论好坏;“这个阶段的战斗已经持续了足够长的

时间，”我想;“必须做出决定。”对于朱莉娅来说，没有阶段，没有起

跑线，根本没有战术。

But later that night when she went to bed and I followed her to her door,

she stopped me.

但那天晚上晚些时候，当她上床睡觉时，我跟着她到她家门口，她

拦住了我。

“No, Charles, not yet. Perhaps never. I don’t know. I don’t know if I

want love.”

“不，查尔斯，还没有。也许永远不会。我不知道。我不知道我是

否想要爱。

Then something, some surviving ghost from those dead ten years—for

one cannot die, even for a little, without some loss—made me say, “Love?

I’m not asking for love.”

然后，从那死去的十年中幸存的幽灵——因为一个人不能死，哪怕

是一点点，没有一点损失——让我说，“爱吗？我不是在要求爱。

“Oh yes, Charles, you are,” she said, and putting up her hand gently

stroked my cheek; then shut her door.

“哦，是的，查尔斯，你是，”她说，举起手轻轻地抚摸着我的脸颊;

然后关上了门。

And I reeled back, first on one wall, then on the other, of the long, softly

lighted, empty corridor; for the storm, it appeared, had the form of a ring;

all day we had been sailing through its still center; now we were once more

in the full fury of the wind—and that night was to be rougher than the one

before.

我向后退去，先是靠在一面墙上，然后是另一面墙上，长长的、灯

光柔和、空荡荡的走廊;因为风暴，它似乎有一个环的形状;我们一整

天都在它静止的中心航行;现在，我们又一次置身于狂风之中——那一

夜将比前一个更艰难。

Ten hours of talking: what had we to say? Plain fact mostly, the record of

our two lives, so long widely separate, now being knit to one. Through all

that storm-tossed night I rehearsed what she had told me; she was no longer

the alternate succubus and starry vision of the night before; she had given

all that was transferable of her past into my keeping. She told me, as I have

already retold, of her courtship and marriage; she told me, as though fondly

turning the pages of an old nursery-book, of her childhood, and I lived long,

sunny days with her in the meadows, with Nanny Hawkins on her camp

stool and Cordelia asleep in the pram, slept quiet nights under the dome

with the religious pictures fading round the cot as the nightlight burned low

and the embers settled in the grate. She told me of her life with Rex and of

the secret, vicious, disastrous escapade that had taken her to New York.

She, too, had had her dead years. She told me of her long struggle with Rex

as to whether she should have a child; at first she wanted one, but learned

after a year that an operation was needed to make it possible; by that time

Rex and she were out of love, but he still wanted his child, and when at last

she consented, it was born dead.

十个小时的谈话：我们有什么要说的？最显而易见的事实是，我们两

个人的生活记录，相距甚远，现在被编织成一个。在那个暴风雨肆虐

的夜晚，我排练了她告诉我的话;她不再是前一天晚上的魅魔和星空幻

象;她已经把她过去所有可以转移的东西都交给了我。正如我已经复述

的那样，她告诉我她的求爱和婚姻;她告诉我，仿佛深情地翻开一本旧

托儿所的书页，她的童年，我和她一起在草地上度过了漫长而阳光明

媚的日子，保姆霍金斯坐在她的营地凳子上，科迪莉亚睡在婴儿车

里，在圆顶下安静地睡着，随着夜灯的昏暗，灰烬落在炉排上，小床

周围的宗教图片逐渐消失。她向我讲述了她和雷克斯的生活，以及把

她带到纽约的秘密、恶毒、灾难性的出轨。她也曾有过死去的岁月。

她告诉我，她与雷克斯在是否应该生孩子方面的长期斗争;起初她想要

一个，但一年后得知需要手术才能实现;那时雷克斯和她已经失恋了，

但他仍然想要他的孩子，当她终于同意时，它已经死了。

“Rex has never been unkind to me intentionally,” she said. “It’s just that

he isn’t a real person at all; he’s just a few faculties of a man highly

developed; the rest simply isn’t there. He couldn’t imagine why it hurt me

to find two months after we came back to London from our honeymoon,

that he was still keeping up with Brenda Champion.”

“雷克斯从来没有故意对我不友善，”她说。“只是他根本不是一个

真实的人;他只是一个高度发达的人的一些能力;其余的根本不存在。

他无法想象为什么在我们度完蜜月回到伦敦两个月后，我发现他仍然

跟上布伦达冠军的步伐，这让我很伤心。

“I was glad when I found Celia was unfaithful,” I said. “I felt it was all

right for me to dislike her.”

“当我发现西莉亚不忠时，我很高兴，”我说。“我觉得我不喜欢她

是可以的。”

“Is she? Do you? I’m glad. I don’t like her either. Why did you marry

her?”

“是吗？是吗？我很高兴。我也不喜欢她。你为什么要娶她？

“Physical attraction. Ambition. Everyone agrees she’s the ideal wife for

a painter. Loneliness, missing Sebastian.”

“身体上的吸引力。野心。每个人都同意她是画家的理想妻子。寂

寞，想念塞巴斯蒂安。

“You loved him, didn’t you?”

“你爱他，不是吗？”

“Oh yes. He was the forerunner.”

“哦，是的。他是先行者。

Julia understood.

茱莉亚明白了。

The ship creaked and shuddered, rose and fell. My wife called to me

from the next room: “Charles, are you there?”

船吱吱作响，颤抖着，起起落落。我的妻子从隔壁房间叫我：“查

尔斯，你在吗？

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“I’ve been asleep such a long while. What time is it?”

“我已经睡了很久了。现在几点了？

“Half past three.”

“三点半。”

“It’s no better, is it?”

“也好不到哪里去吧？”

“Worse.”

“更糟。”

“I feel a little better, though. D’you think they’d bring me some tea or

something if I rang the bell?”

“不过，我感觉好多了。你以为如果我按门铃，他们会给我带来一

些茶或其他东西吗？

I got her some tea and biscuits from the night steward.

我从夜班管家那里给她拿了一些茶和饼干。

“Did you have an amusing evening?”

“你晚上过得开心吗？”

“Everyone’s seasick.”

“大家都晕船了。”

“Poor Charles. It was going to have been such a lovely trip, too. It may

be better tomorrow’

“可怜的查尔斯。这也将是一次非常愉快的旅行。明天可能会更好'

I turned out the light and shut the door between us.

我关掉了灯，关上了我们之间的门。

Waking and dreaming, through the strain and creak and heave of the

long night, firm on my back with my arms and legs spread wide to check

the roll, and my eyes open to the darkness, I lay thinking of Julia.

醒来，做梦，在漫漫长夜的紧张、吱吱声和起伏声中，我坚定地躺

在背上，张开胳膊和腿检查滚动，我的眼睛睁开对着黑暗，我躺在床

上想着朱莉娅。

“… We thought papa might come back to England after mummy died, or

that he might marry again, but he lives just as he did. Rex and I often go to

see him now. I’ve grown fond of him…. Sebastian’s disappeared

completely…. Cordelia’s in Spain with an ambulance…. Bridey leads his

own extraordinary life. He wanted to shut Brideshead after mummy died,

but papa wouldn’t have it for some reason, so Rex and I live there now, and

Bridey has two rooms up in the dome, next to Nanny Hawkins, part of the

old nurseries. He’s like a character from Chekhov. One meets him

sometimes coming out of the library or on the stairs—I never know when

he’s at home—and now and then he suddenly comes in to dinner like a

ghost quite unexpectedly.

"...我们以为爸爸可能会在妈妈去世后回到英国，或者他可能会再

婚，但他的生活和他一样。雷克斯和我现在经常去看他。我越来越喜

欢他了......塞巴斯蒂安完全消失了......Cordelia在西班牙有一辆救护

车......布莱迪过着自己非凡的生活。他想在妈妈死后关闭Brideshead，

但爸爸出于某种原因不愿意，所以Rex和我现在住在那里，Bridey在圆

顶上有两个房间，紧挨着Nanny Hawkins，是旧托儿所的一部分。他就

像契诃夫笔下的人物。人们有时会遇到他，有时从图书馆出来或在楼

梯上——我永远不知道他什么时候在家——有时他突然像幽灵一样突

然进来吃饭，出乎意料。

“… Oh, Rex’s parties! Politics and money. They can’t do anything

except for money; if they walk round the lake they have to make bets about

how many swans they see… sitting up till two, amusing Rex’s girls, hearing

them gossip, rattling away endlessly on the backgammon board while the

men play cards and smoke cigars. The cigar smoke. I can smell it in my hair

when I wake up in the morning; it’s in my clothes when I dress at night. Do

I smell of it now? D’you think that woman who rubbed me, felt it in my

skin?

"...哦，雷克斯的派对！政治和金钱。除了钱，他们什么也做不了;

如果他们在湖边散步，他们必须打赌他们看到了多少天鹅......坐到两

点，逗雷克斯的女孩们开心，听她们八卦，在西洋双陆棋棋盘上无休

止地嘎嘎作响，而男人们则打牌和抽雪茄。雪茄烟。当我早上醒来

时，我可以在头发上闻到它的味道;当我晚上穿衣服时，它就在我的衣

服里。我现在闻到它的味道了吗？你以为那个揉我的女人，在我的皮

肤上感觉到了吗？

“… At first I used to stay away with Rex in his friends’ houses. He

doesn’t make me anymore. He was ashamed of me when he found I didn’t

cut the kind of figure he wanted, ashamed of himself for having been taken

in. I wasn’t at all the article he’d bargained for. He can’t see the point of me,

but whenever he’s made up his mind there isn’t a point and he’s begun to

feel comfortable, he gets a surprise—some man, or even woman, he

respects, takes a fancy to me and he suddenly sees that there is a whole

world of things we understand and he doesn’t… he was upset when I went

away. He’ll be delighted to have me back. I was faithful to him until this

last thing came along. There’s nothing like a good upbringing. Do you

know last year, when I thought I was going to have a child, I’d decided to

have it brought up a Catholic? I hadn’t thought about religion before; I

haven’t since; but just at that time, when I was waiting for the birth, I

thought, ‘That’s one thing I can give her. It doesn’t seem to have done me

much good, but my child shall have it.’ It was odd, wanting to give

something one had lost oneself. Then, in the end, I couldn’t even give that: I

couldn’t even give her life. I never saw her; I was too ill to know what was

going on, and afterwards, for a long time, until now, I didn’t want to speak

about her—she was a daughter, so Rex didn’t so much mind her being dead.

"...起初，我经常和雷克斯一起住在他朋友的家里。他不再造我了。

当他发现我没有剪出他想要的那种身材时，他为我感到羞耻，为自己

被收留而感到羞耻。我根本不是他讨价还价的那篇文章。他看不出我

的意义，但每当他下定决心时，他就没有意义了，他开始感到舒服，

他会得到一个惊喜——他尊重的某个男人，甚至女人，看中了我，他

突然发现有一整个世界，我们理解而他不......当我离开时，他很不高

兴。他会很高兴我回来的。我对他很忠诚，直到最后一件事发生。没

有什么比良好的教养更重要了。你知道吗，去年，当我以为我要生一

个孩子时，我决定让它成为一个天主教徒？我以前没有想过宗教;从那

以后我就没有了;但就在那个时候，当我等待分娩时，我想，'这是我能

给她的一件事。这似乎对我没有多大好处，但我的孩子会得到它。这

很奇怪，想要给自己一些失去的东西。然后，最后，我甚至不能给

她：我甚至不能给她生命。我从未见过她;我病得太重了，不知道发生

了什么，后来，很长一段时间，直到现在，我不想谈论她——她是个

女儿，所以雷克斯并不介意她死了。

“I’ve been punished a little for marrying Rex. You see, I can’t get all

that sort of thing out of my mind, quite—Death, Judgment, Heaven, Hell,

Nanny Hawkins, and the catechism. It becomes part of oneself, if they give

it one early enough. And yet I wanted my child to have it… now I suppose I

shall be punished for what I’ve just done. Perhaps that is why you and I are

here together like this… part of a plan.”

“我因为嫁给雷克斯而受到一点惩罚。你看，我无法把所有这些东

西从我的脑海中抹去，相当——死亡、审判、天堂、地狱、保姆霍金

斯和教理问答。它成为自己的一部分，如果他们足够早地给它一个。

然而，我希望我的孩子拥有它......现在我想我应该为我刚才的所作所为

受到惩罚。也许这就是为什么你和我这样在一起的原因......计划的一部

分。

That was almost the last thing she said to me—“part of a plan”—before

we went below and I left her at the cabin door.

这几乎是她对我说的最后一句话——“计划的一部分”——在我们下

楼之前，我把她留在了机舱门口。

Next day the wind had again dropped, and again we were wallowing in the

swell. The talk was less of seasickness now than of broken bones; people

had been thrown about in the night, and there had been many nasty

accidents on bathroom floors.

第二天，风又停了下来，我们又一次在海浪中打滚。现在谈论的与其

说是晕船，不如说是骨折;人们在夜里被扔来扔去，浴室地板上发生了

许多令人讨厌的事故。

That day, because we had talked so much the day before and because

what we had to say needed few words, we spoke little. We had books; Julia

found a game she liked. When after long silences we spoke, our thoughts,

we found, had kept pace together side by side.

那天，因为我们前一天谈了很多，因为我们要说的话很少，所以我

们很少说话。我们有书;茱莉亚找到了一个她喜欢的游戏。在长时间的

沉默之后，我们发现，我们的思绪一直并排在一起。

Once I said, “You are standing guard over your sadness.”

有一次我说，“你在守卫你的悲伤。

“It’s all I have earned. You said yesterday. My wages.”

“这是我赚到的。你昨天说过。我的工资。

“An I.O.U. from life. A promise to pay on demand.”

“来自生活的I.O.U.。按需付款的承诺。

Rain ceased at midday; at evening the clouds dispersed and the sun,

astern of us, suddenly broke into the lounge where we sat, putting all the

lights to shame.

中午雨停了;傍晚时分，乌云散去，太阳突然闯入我们坐着的休息

室，把所有的灯光都弄得羞愧难当。

“Sunset,” said Julia, “the end of our day.”

“日落，”茱莉亚说，“我们一天的结束。

She rose and, though the roll and pitch of the ship seemed unabated, led

me up to the boat-deck. She put her arm through mine and her hand into

mine, in my great-coat pocket. The deck was dry and empty, swept only by

the wind of the ship’s speed. As we made our halting, laborious way

forward, away from the flying smuts of the smoke stack, we were

alternately jostled together, then strained, nearly sundered, arms and fingers

interlocked as I held the rail and Julia clung to me, thrust together again,

drawn apart; then, in a plunge deeper than the rest, I found myself flung

across her, pressing her against the rail, warding myself off her with the

arms that held her prisoner on either side, and as the ship paused at the end

of its drop as though gathering strength for the ascent, we stood thus

embraced, in the open, cheek against cheek, her hair blowing across my

eyes; the dark horizon of tumbling water, flashing now with gold, stood still

above us, then came sweeping down till I was staring through Julia’s dark

hair into a wide and golden sky, and she was thrown forward on my heart,

held up by my hands on the rail, her face still pressed to mine.

她站了起来，尽管船的颠簸和俯仰似乎有增无减，但她还是把我带

到了船甲板上。她把胳膊穿过我的胳膊，把手伸进我的大衣口袋里。

甲板上干燥而空旷，只有船速的风吹拂着。当我们停下来，费力地向

前走，远离烟囱的飞穗病时，我们交替地挤在一起，然后紧张，几乎

被压断，胳膊和手指交织在一起，我抓住栏杆，朱莉娅紧紧抓住我，

再次推到一起，分开;然后，在比其他人更深的坠入水中，我发现自己

被甩到她身上，把她压在栏杆上，用两边抱着她囚犯的手臂挡住她，

当船在下降的尽头停下来，仿佛在为上升积蓄力量时，我们就这样拥

抱着站在空旷的地方，脸颊贴着脸颊，她的头发吹过我的眼睛;滚滚水

面的黑暗地平线，现在闪烁着金色的光芒，静静地站在我们头顶上，

然后扫过，直到我透过茱莉亚的黑发凝视着广阔的金色天空，她被向

前抛在我的心脏上，被我的双手托在栏杆上，她的脸仍然贴在我的脸

上。

In that minute, with her lips to my ear and her breath warm in the salt

wind, Julia said, though I had not spoken, “Yes, now,” and as the ship

righted herself and for the moment ran into calmer waters, Julia led me

below.

在那一分钟里，茱莉亚的嘴唇贴在我耳边，她的呼吸在咸风中温

暖，茱莉亚说，虽然我没有说话，“是的，现在，”当船自己摆正并暂

时驶入平静的水域时，茱莉亚把我带到了下面。

It was no time for the sweets of luxury; they would come, in their

season, with the swallow and the lime flowers. Now on the rough water

there was a formality to be observed, no more. It was as though a deed of

conveyance of her narrow loins had been drawn and sealed. I was making

my first entry as the freeholder of a property I would enjoy and develop at

leisure.

现在不是享受奢侈甜头的时候;在他们的季节里，他们会带着燕子

和椴花来。现在在波涛汹涌的水面上，有一种形式需要遵守，没有

了。就好像她窄腰的转让契约被抽出并密封了一样。我第一次以自由

持有人的身份进入一个我会在闲暇时享受和开发的财产。

We dined that night high up in the ship, in the restaurant, and saw

through the bow windows the stars come out and sweep across the sky as

once, I remembered, I had seen them sweep above the towers and gables of

Oxford. The stewards promised that tomorrow night the band would play

again and the place be full. We had better book now, they said, if we wanted

a good table.

那天晚上，我们在船上，在餐厅里吃饭，透过船头的窗户，看到星

星出来，扫过天空，我记得，我曾经看到它们掠过牛津的塔楼和山

墙。管家答应明天晚上乐队会再次演出，现场会爆满。他们说，如果

我们想要一张好桌子，我们现在最好订书。

“Oh dear,” said Julia, “where can we hide in fair weather, we orphans of

the storm?”

“噢，亲爱的，”茱莉亚说，“在晴朗的天气里，我们能躲到哪里

去，我们是暴风雨的孤儿？”

I could not leave her that night, but early next morning, as once again I

made my way back along the corridor, I found I could walk without

difficulty; the ship rode easily on a smooth sea, and I knew that our solitude

was broken.

那天晚上我不能离开她，但第二天一大早，当我再次沿着走廊往回

走时，我发现我可以毫无困难地走路了。这艘船在平静的海面上轻松

行驶，我知道我们的孤独被打破了。

My wife called joyously from her cabin: “Charles, Charles, I feel so well.

What do you think I am having for breakfast?”

我的妻子在她的小屋里高兴地喊道：“查尔斯，查尔斯，我感觉很好。

你觉得我早餐吃什么？

I went to see. She was eating a beef steak.

我去看了看。她正在吃牛排。

“I’ve fixed up for a visit to the hairdresser—do you know they couldn’t

take me till four o’clock this afternoon, they’re so busy suddenly? So I

shan’t appear till the evening, but lots of people are coming in to see us this

morning, and I’ve asked Miles and Janet to lunch with us in our sitting-

room. I’m afraid I’ve been a worthless wife to you the last two days. What

have you been up to?”

“我已经安排好了去理发店——你知道他们今天下午四点钟才带我

去吗，他们突然这么忙？所以我要到晚上才出现，但今天早上有很多

人来看我们，我请迈尔斯和珍妮特在我们的客厅里和我们一起吃午

饭。恐怕这两天我对你来说是一个一文不值的妻子。你最近在做什

么？

“One gay evening,” I said, “we played roulette till two o’clock, next

door in the sitting-room, and our host passed out.”

“一个同性恋晚上，”我说，“我们玩轮盘赌到两点钟，在隔壁的客

厅里，我们的主人昏倒了。

“Goodness. It sounds very disreputable. Have you been behaving,

Charles? You haven’t been picking up sirens?”

“天哪。这听起来非常声名狼藉。查尔斯，你表现得好吗？你没在

捡警笛吗？

“There was scarcely a woman about. I spent most of the time with

Julia.”

“几乎没有一个女人。我大部分时间都和茱莉亚在一起。

“Oh, good. I always wanted to bring you together. She’s one of my

friends I knew you’d like. I expect you were a godsend to her. She’s had

rather a gloomy time lately. I don’t expect she mentioned it, but…” my wife

proceeded to relate a current version of Julia’s journey to New York. “I’ll

ask her to cocktails this morning,” she concluded.

“哦，很好。我一直想把你们聚在一起。她是我认识你喜欢的朋友

之一。我想你是她的天赐之物。她最近过得很沮丧。我没想到她提到

过，但是......”我的妻子接着讲述了茱莉亚去纽约的旅程的当前版本。

“我今天早上会请她喝鸡尾酒，”她总结道。

Julia came among the others, and it was happiness enough, now merely

to be near her.

茱莉亚来到其他人中间，现在只要靠近她就已经足够幸福了。

“I hear you’ve been looking after my husband for me,” my wife said.

“我听说你一直在替我照顾我的丈夫，”我妻子说。

“Yes, we’ve become very matey. He and I and a man whose name we

don’t know.”

“是的，我们已经变得非常亲密了。他和我，还有一个我们不知道

名字的人。

“Mr. Kramm, what have you done to your arm?”

“克拉姆先生，你的胳膊怎么样了？”

“It was the bathroom floor,” said Mr. Kramm, and explained at length

how he had fallen.

“那是浴室的地板，”克拉姆先生说，并详细解释了他是如何摔倒

的。

That night the Captain dined at his table and the circle was complete, for

claimants came to the chairs on the Bishop’s right, two Japanese who

expressed deep interest in his projects for world-brotherhood. The Captain

was full of chaff at Julia’s endurance in the storm, offering to engage her as

a seaman; years of sea-going had given him jokes for every occasion. My

wife, fresh from the beauty parlor, was unmarked by her three days of

distress, and in the eyes of many seemed to outshine Julia, whose sadness

had gone and been replaced by an incommunicable content and tranquility;

incommunicable save to me; she and I, separated by the crowd, sat alone

together close enwrapped, as we had lain in each other’s arms the night

before.

那天晚上，上尉在他的餐桌上吃饭，圆圈已经结束了，因为索赔者

来到主教右边的椅子上，两个日本人对他的世界兄弟会计划表示了浓

厚的兴趣。船长对茱莉亚在暴风雨中的忍耐力充满了不满，提出让她

担任海员;多年的航海生涯使他每次都开玩笑。我的妻子刚从美容院出

来，三天的痛苦丝毫没有留下痕迹，在许多人的眼中，她似乎比朱莉

娅更耀眼，朱莉娅的悲伤已经消失了，取而代之的是一种无法传达的

满足和宁静;无法沟通的救命之恩;她和我被人群隔开，像前一天晚上

躺在彼此的怀里一样，紧紧地搂在一起。

There was a gala spirit in the ship that night. Though it meant rising at

dawn to pack, everyone was determined that for this one night he would

enjoy the luxury the storm had denied him. There was no solitude. Every

corner of the ship was thronged; dance music and high, excited chatter,

stewards darting everywhere with trays of glasses, the voice of the officer in

charge of tombola—“Kelly’s eye—number one; legs, eleven; and we’ll

Shake the Bag”—Mrs. Stuyvesant Oglander in a paper cap, Mr. Kramm and

his bandages, the two Japanese decorously throwing paper streamers and

hissing like geese.

那天晚上，船上有一种盛大的气氛。虽然这意味着在黎明时分起床

收拾行李，但每个人都下定决心，为了这一晚，他将享受暴风雨剥夺

了他的奢侈。没有孤独。船上的每个角落都挤满了人;舞曲和高亢而兴

奋的喋喋不休，管家们端着一盘盘的玻璃杯到处飞奔，负责汤博拉的

军官的声音——“凯利的眼睛——第一;腿，十一条;我们来摇一摇袋子

“——戴着纸帽的史岱文森·奥格兰德夫人，克拉姆先生和他的绷带，

两个日本人彬彬有礼地扔着纸飘带，像鹅一样嘶嘶作响。

I did not speak to Julia, alone, all that evening.

那天晚上，我没有单独和茱莉亚说话。

We met for a minute next day on the starboard side of the ship while

everyone else crowded to port to see the officials come aboard and to gaze

at the green coastline of Devon.

第二天，我们在船的右舷开了一分钟，而其他人都挤到港口，看官

员们上船，凝视着德文郡的绿色海岸线。

“What are your plans?”

“你有什么计划？”

“London for a bit,” she said.

“伦敦一会儿，”她说。

“Celia’s going straight home. She wants to see the children.”

“西莉亚要直接回家了。她想看看孩子们。

“You, too?”

“你也是？”

“No.”

“没有。”

“In London then.”

“那就在伦敦。”

“Charles, the little red-haired man—Foulenough. Did you see? Two plain

clothes police have taken him off.”

“查尔斯，那个红头发的小家伙——犯规。你看到了吗？两名便衣警察

已经把他带走了。

“I missed it. There was such a crowd on that side of the ship.”

“我错过了。船的那边有这么一群人。

“I found out the trains and sent a telegram. We shall be home by dinner.

The children will be asleep. Perhaps we might wake Johnjohn up, just for

once.”

“我找到了火车并发了一封电报。我们将在晚餐前回家。孩子们会

睡着。也许我们可以叫醒约翰约翰，就这一次。

“You go down,” I said. “I shall have to stay in London.”

“你下去吧，”我说。“我得留在伦敦。”

“Oh, but Charles, you must come. You haven’t seen Caroline.”

“哦，但是查尔斯，你必须来。你没见过卡罗琳。

“Will she change much in a week or two?”

“一两个星期后她会改变很多吗？”

“Darling, she changes every day.”

“亲爱的，她每天都在变化。”

“Then what’s the point of seeing her now? I’m sorry, my dear, but I must

get the pictures unpacked and see how they’ve travelled. I must fix up for

the exhibition right away.”

“那现在见到她有什么意义呢？对不起，亲爱的，但我必须把照片

拆开，看看它们是如何旅行的。我必须马上为展览做准备。

“Must you?” she said, but I knew that her resistance ended when I

appealed to the mysteries of my trade. “It’s very disappointing. Besides, I

don’t know if Andrew and Cynthia will be out of the flat. They took it till

the end of the month.”

“你一定要吗？”她说，但我知道，当我诉诸于我的交易的奥秘时，

她的反抗就结束了。“这非常令人失望。此外，我不知道安德鲁和辛西

娅会不会离开公寓。他们一直坚持到月底。

“I can go to an hotel.”

“我可以去酒店。”

“But that’s so grim. I can’t bear you to be alone your first night home.

I’ll stay and go down tomorrow.”

“但这太严峻了。我无法忍受你独自一人度过回家的第一晚。我留

下来，明天下去。

“You mustn’t disappoint the children.”

“你不能让孩子们失望。”

“No.” Her children, my art, the two mysteries of our trades.

“没有。”她的孩子，我的艺术，我们交易的两个奥秘。

“Will you come for the week-end?”

“周末你会来吗？”

“If I can.”

“如果可以的话。”

“All British passports to the smoking-room, please,” said a steward.

“请把所有英国护照都带到吸烟室，”一名管家说。

“I’ve arranged with that sweet Foreign Office man at our table to get us

off early with him,” said my wife.

“我已经和我们餐桌上那位可爱的外交部男人安排好了，让我们早

点和他一起下车，”我妻子说。

Two

It was my wife’s idea to hold the private view on Friday.

我妻子的主意是在周五举行私人会议。

“We are out to catch the critics this time,” she said. “It’s high time they

began to take you seriously, and they know it. This is their chance. If you

open on Monday, they’ll most of them have just come up from the country,

and they’ll dash off a few paragraphs before dinner—I’m only worrying

about the weeklies of course. If we give them the week-end to think about

it, we shall have them in an urbane Sunday-in-the-country mood. They’ll

settle down after a good luncheon, tuck up their cuffs, and turn out a nice,

leisurely full-length essay, which they’ll reprint later in a nice little book.

Nothing less will do this time.”

“这次我们要抓住批评者，”她说。“现在是他们开始认真对待你的

时候了，他们知道这一点。这是他们的机会。如果你周一开门，他们

中的大多数人都刚从乡下回来，他们会在晚饭前匆匆忙忙地写几段

——当然，我只担心周刊。如果我们给他们周末的时间来思考这个问

题，我们就会让他们在乡下度过一个温文尔雅的星期天。他们会在一

顿丰盛的午餐后安顿下来，掖起袖口，写出一篇漂亮、悠闲的长篇文

章，稍后他们会在一本漂亮的小书中重印。这一次不会再少了。

She was up and down from the Old Rectory several times during the

month of preparation, revising the list of invitations and helping with the

hanging.

在准备的一个月里，她多次在旧教区长那里来回走动，修改邀请函

清单并帮助处理绞刑。

On the morning of the private view I telephoned to Julia and said: “I’m

sick of the pictures already and never want to see them again, but I suppose

I shall have to put in an appearance.”

在私人观看的那天早上，我打电话给朱莉娅说：“我已经厌倦了这

些照片，再也不想看到它们了，但我想我必须露面。

“D’you want me to come?”

“你要我来吗？”

“I’d much rather you didn’t.”

“我宁愿你不要。”

“Celia sent a card with “Bring everyone” written across it in green ink.

When do we meet?”

“西莉亚寄来了一张卡片，上面用绿色墨水写着”带上所有人“。我

们什么时候见面？

“In the train. You might pick up my luggage.”

“在火车上。你可以帮我拿行李。

“If you’ll have it packed soon I’ll pick you up, too, and drop you at the

gallery. I’ve got a fitting next door at twelve.”

“如果你很快就收拾好了，我也会来接你，然后把你送到画廊。我

十二点钟在隔壁有一个试衣间。

When I reached the gallery my wife was standing looking through the

window to the street. Behind her half a dozen unknown picture-lovers were

moving from canvas to canvas, catalogue in hand; they were people who

had once bought a wood-cut and were consequently on the gallery’s list of

patrons.

当我到达画廊时，我的妻子正站在窗户外望向街道。在她身后，六

个不知名的画迷手里拿着目录，从一块画布走到另一幅画布;他们曾经

买过一幅木刻画，因此在画廊的赞助人名单上。

“No one has come yet,” said my wife. “I’ve been here since ten and it’s

been very dull. Whose car was that you came in?”

“还没人来，”我妻子说。“我从十点开始就来这里了，这里非常沉

闷。你进来的是谁的车？

“Julia’s.”

“茱莉亚的。”

“Julia’s? Why didn’t you bring her in? Oddly enough, I’ve just been

talking about Brideshead to a funny little man who seemed to know us very

well. He said he was called Mr. Samgrass. Apparently he’s one of Lord

Copper’s middle-aged young men on the Daily Beast. I tried to feed him

some paragraphs, but he seemed to know more about you than I do. He said

he’d met me years ago at Brideshead. I wish Julia had come in; then we

could have asked her about him.”

“茱莉亚的？你为什么不把她带进来？奇怪的是，我刚刚在和一个

有趣的小个子谈论新娘头，他似乎很了解我们。他说他叫萨姆格拉斯

先生。显然，他是铜勋爵在《每日野兽》上的中年年轻人之一。我试

着给他喂一些段落，但他似乎比我更了解你。他说他几年前在布里德

斯黑德见过我。我希望茱莉亚进来;那我们本来可以问问她关于他的事

的。

“I remember him well. He’s a crook.”

“我记得很清楚。他是个骗子。

“Yes, that stuck out a mile. He’s been talking all about what he calls the

‘Brideshead set.’ Apparently Rex Mottram has made the place a nest of

party mutiny. Did you know? What would Teresa Marchmain have

thought?”

“是的，那突出了一英里。他一直在谈论他所谓的“新娘头套装”。

显然，雷克斯·莫特拉姆（Rex Mottram）已经使这个地方成为党内叛

变的巢穴。您知道吗？特蕾莎·马奇曼会怎么想？

“I’m going there tonight.”

“我今晚要去那里。”

“Not tonight, Charles; you can’t go there tonight. You’re expected at

home. You promised, as soon as the exhibition was ready, you’d come

home. Johnjohn and Nanny have made a banner with ‘Welcome’ on it. And

you haven’t seen Caroline yet.”

“今晚不行，查尔斯;你今晚不能去那里。你应该在家里。你答应

过，一旦展览准备好，你就会回家。Johnjohn 和 Nanny 制作了一条横

幅，上面写着“欢迎”。你还没见过卡罗琳呢。

“I’m sorry, it’s all settled.”

“对不起，一切都解决了。”

“Besides, Daddy will think it so odd. And Boy is home for Sunday. And

you haven’t seen the new studio. You can’t go tonight. Did they ask me?”

“再说了，爸爸会觉得很奇怪。男孩星期天回家了。而且你还没有

看到新的工作室。你今晚不能去。他们问我了吗？

“Of course; but I knew you wouldn’t be able to come.”

“当然;但我知道你不能来。

“I can’t now. I could have, if you’d let me know earlier. I should adore

to see the ‘Brideshead set’ at home. I do think you’re perfectly beastly, but

this is no time for a family rumpus. The Clarences promised to come in

before luncheon; they may be here any minute.”

“我现在不能。如果你早点告诉我，我本来可以的。我应该很喜欢

在家里看到“新娘头套装”。我确实认为你非常野兽，但现在不是家庭

暴躁的时候。克拉伦斯夫妇答应在午餐前进来;他们随时都可能在这

里。

We were interrupted, however, not by royalty, but by a woman reporter

from one of the dailies, whom the manager of the gallery now led up to us.

She had not come to see the pictures but to get a ‘human story’ of the

dangers of my journey. I left her to my wife, and next day read in her paper:

“Charles ‘Stately Homes’ Ryder steps off the map. That the snakes and

vampires of the jungle have nothing on Mayfair is the opinion of socialite

artist Ryder, who has abandoned the houses of the great for the ruins of

equatorial Africa…”

然而，我们被打断的不是皇室成员，而是来自一家日报的一位女记

者，画廊的经理现在把她带到了我们面前。她不是来看照片的，而是

来了解我旅途中危险的“人性故事”。我把她留给我的妻子，第二天在

她的报纸上读到：“查尔斯'庄严的家'莱德从地图上走了下来。丛林中

的蛇和吸血鬼对梅菲尔一无所知，这是社交名媛艺术家莱德的观点，

他放弃了伟人的房屋，转而前往赤道非洲的废墟......”

The rooms began to fill and I was soon busy being civil. My wife was

everywhere, greeting people, introducing people, deftly transforming the

crowd into a party. I saw her lead friends forward one after another to the

subscription list that had been opened for the book of Ryder’s Latin

America; I heard her say: “No, darling, I’m not at all surprised, but you

wouldn’t expect me to be, would you? You see Charles lives for one thing

—Beauty. I think he got bored with finding it ready-made in England; he

had to go and create it for himself. He wanted new worlds to conquer. After

all, he has said the last word about country houses, hasn’t he? Not, I mean,

that he’s given that up altogether. I’m sure he’ll always do one or two more

for friends.”

房间开始坐满了人，我很快就忙着保持文明。我的妻子无处不在，

向人们打招呼，介绍人们，巧妙地将人群变成一个聚会。我看到她带

领朋友们一个接一个地前进到莱德的《拉丁美洲》一书的订阅名单上;

我听见她说：“不，亲爱的，我一点也不惊讶，但你不会指望我，是

吗？你看查尔斯只为一件事而活——美丽。我认为他已经厌倦了在英

国找到现成的;他必须去为自己创造它。他想要征服新的世界。毕竟，

他已经对乡间别墅说了最后一句话，不是吗？不是，我的意思是，他

已经完全放弃了。我相信他总是会为朋友多做一两件事。

A photographer brought us together, flashed a lamp in our faces, and let

us part.

一位摄影师把我们聚集在一起，把一盏灯照在我们的脸上，让我们

分开。

Presently there was the slight hush and edging away which follows the

entry of a royal party. I saw my wife curtsey and heard her say: “Oh, sir,

you are sweet”; then I was led into the clearing and the Duke of Clarence

said: “Pretty hot out there I should think.”

现在，随着皇家派对的进入，有轻微的安静和渐渐消失。我看到我

的妻子行屈膝礼，听到她说：“哦，先生，你很甜蜜”;然后我被带到空

地上，克拉伦斯公爵说：“外面很热，我应该想想。

“It was, sir.”

“是的，先生。”

“Awfully clever the way you’ve hit off the impression of heat. Makes

me feel quite uncomfortable in my great-coat.”

“你给人留下热印象的方式真是太聪明了。让我穿着大衣感觉很不

舒服。

“Ha, ha.”

“什么，什么。”

When they had gone my wife said: “Goodness, we’re late for lunch.

Margot’s giving a party in your honor,” and in the taxi she said: “I’ve just

thought of something. Why don’t you write and ask the Duchess of

Clarence’s permission to dedicate Latin America to her?”

当他们走后，我的妻子说：“天哪，我们吃午饭迟到了。玛格特正

在为你举办一个派对，“在出租车上，她说：”我刚刚想到了一件事。

你为什么不写信请求克拉伦斯公爵夫人允许将拉丁美洲献给她呢？

“Why should I?”

“我为什么要这样做？”

“She’d love it so.”

“她会喜欢的。”

“I wasn’t thinking of dedicating it to anyone.”

“我没想过把它献给任何人。”

“There you are; that’s typical of you, Charles. Why miss an opportunity

to give pleasure?”

“你来了;这是你的典型特征，查尔斯。为什么要错过一个给予快乐

的机会呢？

There were a dozen at luncheon, and though it pleased my hostess and

my wife to say that they were there in my honor, it was plain to me that half

of them did not know of my exhibition and had come because they had

been invited and had no other engagement. Throughout luncheon they

talked, without stopping, of Mrs. Simpson, but they all, or nearly all, came

back with us to the gallery.

午餐会上有十几个人，虽然我的女主人和我的妻子很高兴地说他们

是为了我的荣誉而来的，但我很清楚，他们中有一半人不知道我的展

览，他们来是因为他们被邀请了，没有其他活动。在整个午餐期间，

他们不停地谈论辛普森夫人，但他们所有人，或者几乎所有人都和我

们一起回到了画廊。

The hour after luncheon was the busiest time. There were

representatives of the Tate Gallery and the National Art Collections Fund,

who all promised to return shortly with colleagues and, in the meantime,

reserved certain pictures for further consideration. The most influential

critic, who in the past had dismissed me with a few wounding

commendations, peered out at me from between his slouch hat and woollen

muffler, gripped my arm, and said: “I knew you had it. I saw it there. I’ve

been waiting for it.”

午饭后的一个小时是最繁忙的时间。泰特美术馆和国家艺术收藏基

金会的代表都承诺很快会与同事一起返回，同时保留了某些照片以供

进一步考虑。最有影响力的评论家，过去曾对我说过几句伤人的话，

他从他慵懒的帽子和羊毛围巾之间凝视着我，抓住我的胳膊说：“我知

道你有它。我在那里看到了。我一直在等待它。

From fashionable and unfashionable lips alike I heard fragments of

praise. “If you’d asked me to guess,” I overheard, “Ryder’s is the last name

would have occurred to me. They’re so virile, so passionate.”

从时髦和不时髦的嘴唇中，我听到了赞美的片段。“如果你让我

猜，”我无意中听到，“莱德是我的姓氏。他们是如此的阳刚之气，如

此的热情。

They all thought they had found something new. It had not been thus at

my last exhibition in these same rooms, shortly before my going abroad.

Then there had been an unmistakable note of weariness. Then the talk had

been less of me than of the houses, anecdotes of their owners. That same

woman, it came back to me, who now applauded my virility and passion,

had stood quite near me, before a painfully labored canvas, and said, “So

facile.”

他们都以为他们发现了新的东西。在我出国前不久，我在同一个房

间里的最后一次展览中并没有这样。然后有一种明显的疲惫感。那

时，人们谈论的不是我，而是房子的主人的轶事。我回想起了那个女

人，她现在为我的阳刚之气和激情鼓掌，站在离我很近的地方，在一

幅痛苦的画布前，说：“太容易了。

I remembered the exhibition, too, for another reason; it was the week I

detected my wife in adultery. Then, as now, she was a tireless hostess, and I

heard her say: “Whenever I see anything lovely nowadays—a building or a

piece of scenery—I think to myself, “that’s by Charles”. I see everything

through his eyes. He is England to me.”

出于另一个原因，我也想起了这个展览。那一周，我发现我的妻子

通奸了。那时，就像现在一样，她是一个不知疲倦的女主人，我听到

她说：“现在每当我看到任何可爱的东西——一栋建筑或一片风景——

我都会想，'那是查尔斯的'。我通过他的眼睛看到一切。对我来说，他

就是英格兰。

I heard her say that; it was the sort of thing she had the habit of saying.

Throughout our married life, again and again, I had felt my bowels shrivel

within me at the things she said. But that day, in this gallery, I heard her

unmoved, and suddenly realized that she was powerless to hurt me any

more; I was a free man; she had given me my manumission in that brief, sly

lapse of hers; my cuckold’s horns made me lord of the forest.

我听到她这么说;这是她习惯说的那种话。在我们的婚姻生活中，

我一次又一次地感到我的肠子在我心里干瘪，因为她说的话。但那

天，在这个画廊里，我听到她不为所动，突然意识到她无力再伤害我

了;我是一个自由人;她把我的手抄送给我，那是她那短暂而狡猾的失

误;我戴绿帽子的角使我成为森林之王。

At the end of the day my wife said: “Darling, I must go. It’s been a

terrific success, hasn’t it? I’ll think of something to tell them at home, but I

wish it hadn’t got to happen quite this way.”

一天结束时，我的妻子说：“亲爱的，我必须走了。这是一个了不

起的成功，不是吗？我会想些什么在家里告诉他们，但我希望事情不

会以这种方式发生。

“So she knows,” I thought. “She’s a sharp one. She’s had her nose down

since luncheon and picked up the scent.”

“所以她知道，”我想。“她很敏锐。自从午餐后，她就低下了鼻

子，闻到了气味。

I let her get clear of the place and was about to follow—the rooms were

nearly empty—when I heard a voice at the turnstile I had not heard for

many years, an unforgettable self-taught stammer, a sharp cadence of

remonstration.

我让她离开这个地方，正要跟上去——房间里几乎空无一人——这

时我听到旋转门上有一个我多年未曾听到的声音，一个令人难忘的自

学成才的结巴，一个尖锐的训诫节奏。

“No. I have not brought a card of invitation. I do not even know whether

I received one. I have not come to a social function; I do not seek to scrape

acquaintance with Lady Celia; I do not want my photograph in the Tatler, I

have not come to exhibit myself. I have come to see the pictures. Perhaps

you are unaware that there are any pictures here. I happen to have a

personal interest in the artist—if that word has any meaning for you.”

“不。我没有带邀请卡。我什至不知道我是否收到了。我没有参加

过社交活动;我不想与西莉亚夫人相识;我不想在Tatler上刊登我的照

片，我不是来展示自己的。我是来看照片的。也许你不知道这里有任

何图片。我碰巧对这位艺术家有个人兴趣——如果这个词对你有什么

意义的话。

“Antoine,” I said, “come in.”

“安托万，”我说，“进来吧。

“My dear, there is a g-g-gorgon here who thinks I am g-g-gate-crashing.

I only arrived in London yesterday, and heard quite by chance at luncheon

that you were having an exhibition, so of course I dashed impetuously to

the shrine to pay homage. Have I changed? Would you recognize me?

Where are the pictures? Let me explain them to you.”

“亲爱的，这里有一个g-g-gorgon，他认为我在g-g-gate崩溃。我昨

天才到伦敦，在午餐会上偶然听说你要举办展览，所以我当然急忙跑

到神社参拜。我变了吗？你能认出我吗？图片在哪里？让我向你解释

一下。

Anthony Blanche had not changed from when I last saw him; not,

indeed, from when I first saw him. He swept lightly across the room to the

most prominent canvas—a jungle landscape—paused a moment, his head

cocked like a knowing terrier, and asked: “Where, my dear Charles, did you

find this sumptuous greenery? The corner of a hothouse at T-t-trent or T-t-

tring? What gorgeous usurer nurtured these fronds for your pleasure?”

安东尼·布兰奇（Anthony Blanche）与我上次见到他时相比没有变

化;事实上，从我第一次见到他的时候开始，就不是了。他轻描淡写地

扫过房间，来到最显眼的画布上——一幅丛林风景——停顿了一会

儿，像一只会见地的猎犬一样歪着头，问道：“我亲爱的查尔斯，你在

哪里找到这片茂盛的绿色植物？T-t-trent 或 T-t-tring 温室的角落？哪个

华丽的高利贷者为了你的快乐而培育了这些叶子？

Then he made a tour of the two rooms; once or twice he sighed deeply,

otherwise he kept silence. When he came to the end he sighed once more,

more deeply than ever, and said: “But they tell me, my dear, you are happy

in love. That is everything, is it not, or nearly everything?”

然后他参观了两个房间;有一两次他深深地叹了口气，否则他就保

持沉默。当他走到尽头时，他又叹了一口气，比以往任何时候都更

深，说：“但是他们告诉我，亲爱的，你在爱情中是幸福的。这就是一

切，不是吗，或者几乎是一切？

“Are they as bad as that?”

“他们有那么坏吗？”

Anthony dropped his voice to a piercing whisper: “My dear, let us not

expose your little imposture before these good, plain people”—he gave a

conspiratorial glance to the last remnants of the crowd—“let us not spoil

their innocent pleasure. We know, you and I, that this is all t-t-terrible t-t-

tripe. Let us go, before we offend the connoisseurs. I know of a louche little

bar quite near here. Let us go there and talk of your other c-c-conquests.”

安东尼压低了声音，低声说：“亲爱的，让我们不要在这些善良、

朴素的人面前暴露你的小冒名顶替，”他阴谋地瞥了一眼人群中最后的

残余——“让我们不要破坏他们无辜的乐趣。我们知道，你和我，这都

是可怕的t-t-t-tripe。在我们冒犯鉴赏家之前，让我们走吧。我知道这

里附近有一家小酒吧。让我们去那里谈谈你的其他c-c-征服。

It needed this voice from the past to recall me; the indiscriminate chatter

of praise all that crowded day had worked on me like a succession of

advertisement hoardings on a long road, kilometer after kilometer between

the poplars, commanding one to stay at some new hotel, so that when at the

end of the drive, stiff and dusty, one arrives at the destination, it seems

inevitable to turn into the yard under the name that had first bored, then

angered one, and finally become an inseparable part of one’s fatigue.

它需要这个来自过去的声音来唤起我;在那拥挤的一天里，不分青

红皂白的赞美喋喋不休地对我起作用，就像在一条长长的道路上，在

白杨树之间一公里又一公里的广告囤积，命令人们住在某个新旅馆，

所以当在开车的尽头，僵硬而尘土飞扬，到达目的地时，似乎不可避

免地会以最初无聊的名字拐进院子，然后惹怒了一个人，最后成为一

个人疲惫不可分割的一部分。

Anthony led me from the gallery and down a side street to a door

between a disreputable newsagent and a disreputable chemist, painted with

the words ‘Blue Grotto Club. Members only.”

安东尼带我离开画廊，沿着一条小街走到一个声名狼藉的报刊亭和

一个声名狼藉的化学家之间的一扇门，门上画着“蓝洞俱乐部”的字

样。仅限会员。

“Not quite your milieu, my dear, but mine, I assure you. After all, you

have been in your milieu all day.”

“不完全是你的环境，亲爱的，但我的，我向你保证。毕竟，你已

经整天待在你的环境中了。

He led me downstairs, from a smell of cats to a smell of gin and

cigarette-ends and the sound of a wireless.

他带我下楼，从猫的味道到杜松子酒和烟头的味道，还有无线的声

音。

“I was given the address by a dirty old man in the Bœuf sur le Toit. I am

most grateful to him. I have been out of England so long, and really

sympathetic little joints like this change so fast. I presented myself here for

the first time yesterday evening, and already I feel quite at home. Good

evening, Cyril.”

“我是Bœuf sur le Toit的一个肮脏的老人给我的地址。我非常感谢

他。我已经离开英国这么久了，像这样真正有同情心的小关节变化得

如此之快。昨天晚上我第一次来到这里，我已经感到宾至如归。晚上

好，西里尔。

“ ’Lo, Toni, back again?” said the youth behind the bar.

“瞧，托尼，又回来了？”吧台后面的年轻人说。

“We will take our drinks and sit in a corner. You must remember, my

dear, that here you are just as conspicuous and, may I say, abnormal, my

dear, as I should be in B-b-bratt’s.”

“我们会拿着饮料坐在角落里。亲爱的，你要记住，在这里，你和

我在B-b-bratt's里一样显眼，而且，我可以说，不正常，就像我在B-b-

bratt's里一样。

The place was painted cobalt; there was cobalt linoleum on the floor.

Fishes of silver and gold paper had been pasted haphazard on ceiling and

walls. Half a dozen youths were drinking and playing with the slot-

machines; an older, natty, crapulous-looking man seemed to be in control;

there was some sniggering round the fruit-gum machine; then one of the

youths came up to us and said, “Would your friend care to rhumba?”

这个地方被涂成钴色;地板上有钴油毡。银纸和金纸的鱼被随意地

粘贴在天花板和墙壁上。六名年轻人正在喝酒和玩老虎机;一个年长

的、天真的、看起来很粗鲁的男人似乎在控制之中;果胶机周围传来一

阵嘲笑声;这时，一个年轻人走过来，对我们说：“你的朋友愿意伦巴

吗？

“No, Tom, he would not, and I’m not going to give you a drink; not yet,

anyway. That’s a very impudent boy, a regular little gold-digger, my dear.”

“不，汤姆，他不会，我也不会给你喝酒;反正还没有。那是一个非

常无礼的男孩，一个普通的小淘金者，亲爱的。

“Well,” I said, affecting an ease I was far from feeling in that den, “what

have you been up to all these years?”

“嗯，”我说，影响了我在那个书房里远没有感觉到的轻松，“这些

年来你在做什么？

“My dear, it is what you have been up to that we are here to talk about.

I’ve been watching you, my dear. I’m a faithful old body and I’ve kept my

eye on you.” As he spoke the bar and the bar-tender, the blue wicker

furniture, the gambling-machines, the gramophone, the couple of youths

dancing on the oilcloth, the youths sniggering round the slots, the purple-

veined, stiffly-dressed elderly man drinking in the corner opposite us, the

whole drab and furtive joint seemed to fade, and I was back in Oxford

looking out over Christ Church meadow through a window of Ruskin-

Gothic. “I went to your first exhibition,” said Anthony; “I found it—

charming. There was an interior of Marchmain House, very English, very

correct, but quite delicious. ‘Charles has done something,’ I said; ‘not all he

will do, not all he can do, but something.’

“亲爱的，这就是我们在这里谈论的你所做的事情。我一直在看着

你，亲爱的。我是一个忠实的老身体，我一直盯着你。当他说话时，

酒吧和酒保，蓝色柳条家具，赌博机，留声机，几个年轻人在油布上

跳舞，年轻人在老虎机周围傻笑，紫色血管，穿着僵硬的老人在我们

对面的角落里喝酒，整个单调和偷偷摸摸的关节似乎都消失了，我回

到了牛津，透过罗斯金哥特式的窗户眺望基督教堂的草地。“我去看了

你的第一个展览，”安东尼说;“我发现它很迷人。Marchmain House有

一个内部，非常英式，非常正确，但相当美味。“查尔斯做了一些事

情，”我说;“不是他会做的一切，不是他能做的一切，而是有些事

情。”

“Even then, my dear, I wondered a little. It seemed to me that there was

something a little gentlemanly about your painting. You must remember I

am not English; I cannot understand this keen zest to be well-bred. English

snobbery is more macabre to me even than English morals. However, I said,

‘Charles has done something delicious. What will he do next?’

“即便如此，亲爱的，我还是有点纳闷。在我看来，你的画有点绅

士风度。你必须记住我不是英国人;我无法理解这种对有教养的强烈热

情。对我来说，英国的势利甚至比英国的道德更可怕。然而，我

说，'查尔斯做了一件好吃的事情。他接下来会做什么？

“The next thing I saw was your very handsome volume—‘Village and

Provincial Architecture,’ was it called? Quite a tome, my dear, and what did

I find? Charm again. ‘Not quite my cup of tea,’ I thought; ‘this is too

English.’ I have the fancy for rather spicy things, you know, not for the

shade of the cedar tree, the cucumber sandwich, the silver cream-jug, the

English girl dressed in whatever English girls do wear for tennis—not that,

not Jane Austen, not M-m-miss M-m-mitford. Then, to be frank, dear

Charles, I despaired of you. ‘I am a degenerate old d-d-dago,’ I said ‘and

Charles—I speak of your art, my dear—is a dean’s daughter in flowered

muslin.’

“接下来我看到的是你那本非常漂亮的书——《乡村和省级建

筑》，它叫吗？相当一本巨著，亲爱的，我发现了什么？再次魅力。

“不完全是我的那杯茶，”我想;“这太英式了。”我看中了相当辛辣的东

西，你知道，不是雪松树的树荫，黄瓜三明治，银色的奶油壶，英国

女孩穿着英国女孩打网球时穿的衣服——不是那个，不是简·奥斯汀，

不是M-m-miss M-m-mitford。然后，坦率地说，亲爱的查尔斯，我对

你感到绝望。“我是个堕落的老d-d-dago，”我说，“查尔斯——我说的

是你的艺术，亲爱的——是院长的女儿，穿着花纹细布。

“Imagine then my excitement at luncheon today. Everyone was talking

about you. My hostess was a friend of my mother’s, a Mrs. Stuyvesant

Oglander; a friend of yours, too, my dear. Such a frump! Not at all the

society I imagined you to keep. However, they had all been to your

exhibition, but it was you they talked of, how you had broken away, my

dear, gone to the tropics, become a Gauguin, a Rimbaud. You can imagine

how my old heart leaped.

“想象一下我今天午餐时的兴奋。每个人都在谈论你。我的女主人

是我母亲的朋友，史岱文森·奥格兰德夫人;亲爱的，也是你的朋友。真

是太糟糕了！完全不是我想象中你要保持的社会。然而，他们都去过

你的展览，但他们谈论的是你，你是如何脱离的，亲爱的，去了热带

地区，成为高更，兰波。你可以想象我的老心脏是如何跳跃的。

“ ‘Poor Celia,’ they said, ‘after all she’s done for him.’ ‘He owes

everything to her. It’s too bad.’ ‘And with Julia,’ they said, ‘after the way

she behaved in America.’ ‘Just as she was going back to Rex.’

“可怜的西莉亚，”他们说，“毕竟她已经为他做了。“他欠她的一

切。这太糟糕了。“还有茱莉亚，”他们说，“效仿她在美国的行为方

式。“就在她要回雷克斯的时候。”

“ ‘But the pictures,’ I said; ‘tell me about them.’ ”

“'可是照片，'我说;'跟我说说他们吧。"

“ ‘Oh, the pictures,’ they said; ‘they’re most peculiar.’ ‘Not at all what

he usually does.’ ‘Very forceful.’ ‘Quite barbaric.’ ‘I call them downright

unhealthy,’ said Mrs. Stuyvesant Oglander.

“'哦，照片，'他们说;'他们是最奇特的。“完全不是他平时做的。”

“很有力。”“相当野蛮。”“我说他们完全不健康，”史岱文森特·奥格兰

德夫人说。

“My dear, I could hardly keep still in my chair. I wanted to dash out of

the house and leap in a taxi and say, ‘Take me to Charles’s unhealthy

pictures.’ Well, I went, but the gallery after luncheon was so full of absurd

women in the sort of hats they should be made to eat, that I rested a little—I

rested here with Cyril and Tom and these saucy boys. Then I came back at

the unfashionable time of five o’clock, all agog, my dear; and what did I

find? I found, my dear, a very naughty and very successful practical joke. It

reminded me of dear Sebastian when he liked so much to dress up in false

whiskers. It was charm again, my dear, simple, creamy English charm,

playing tigers.”

“亲爱的，我几乎无法在椅子上保持静止。我想冲出家门，跳上出

租车，说，'带我去看查尔斯的不健康照片。好吧，我去了，但是午饭

后的画廊里到处都是荒谬的女人，她们应该被强迫吃的那种帽子，所

以我休息了一会儿——我和西里尔、汤姆和这些俏皮的男孩一起休

息。然后我在五点钟的不合时宜的时间回来了，我亲爱的，一切都很

痛苦;我发现了什么？亲爱的，我发现了一个非常顽皮且非常成功的实

用笑话。这让我想起了亲爱的塞巴斯蒂安，当时他非常喜欢打扮成假

胡须。这又是魅力，我亲爱的，简单，奶油般的英国魅力，扮演老

虎。

“You’re quite right,” I said.

“你说得很对，”我说。

“My dear, of course I’m right. I was right years ago—more years, I am

happy to say, than either of us shows—when I warned you. I took you out

to dinner to warn you of charm. I warned you expressly and in great detail

of the Flyte family. Charm is the great English blight. It does not exist

outside these damp islands. It spots and kills anything it touches. It kills

love; it kills art; I greatly fear, my dear Charles, it has killed you.”

“亲爱的，我当然是对的。几年前，当我警告你时，我是对的——

我很高兴地说，比我们俩都多。我带你出去吃饭，是为了警告你的魅

力。我明确而详细地警告过你弗莱特家族。魅力是英国的一大败笔。

它不存在于这些潮湿的岛屿之外。它发现并杀死它所接触的任何东

西。它扼杀了爱;它扼杀了艺术;我非常害怕，我亲爱的查尔斯，它已

经杀死了你。

The youth called Tom approached us again. “Don’t be a tease, Toni; buy

me a drink.” I remembered my train and left Anthony with him.

那个叫汤姆的年轻人又来找我们了。“别逗了，托尼;给我买杯饮

料。我想起了我的火车，把安东尼留在他身边。

As I stood on the platform by the restaurant-car I saw my luggage and

Julia’s go past with Julia’s sour-faced maid strutting beside the porter. They

had begun shutting the carriage doors when Julia arrived, unhurried, and

took her place in front of me. I had a table for two. This was a very

convenient train; there was half an hour before dinner and half an hour after

it; then, instead of changing to the branch line, as had been the rule in Lady

Marchmain’s day, we were met at the junction. It was night as we drew out

of Paddington, and the glow of the town gave place first to the scattered

lights of the suburbs, then to the darkness of the fields.

当我站在餐车旁的月台上时，我看到我的行李和茱莉亚的行李经

过，茱莉亚的女仆在门房旁边昂首阔步。他们刚开始关上马车门，茱

莉亚就来了，不紧不慢，在我面前坐下。我有一张两人桌。这是一列

非常方便的火车;晚饭前半小时，晚饭后半小时;然后，我们没有像马

奇曼夫人时代的规则那样改乘支线，而是在路口相遇。当我们离开帕

丁顿时，已经是晚上了，小镇的光芒首先让位于郊区的零星灯光，然

后是田野的黑暗。

“It seems days since I saw you,” I said.

“我好像好几天没见到你了，”我说。

“Six hours; and we were together all yesterday. You look worn out.”

“六个小时;我们昨天都在一起了。你看起来很疲惫。

“It’s been a day of nightmare—crowds, critics, the Clarences, a

luncheon party at Margot’s, ending up with half an hour’s well-reasoned

abuse of my pictures in a pansy bar…. I think Celia knows about us.”

“这是噩梦般的一天——人群、评论家、克拉伦斯夫妇、玛格特的

午餐派对，最后在三色堇酒吧里对我的照片进行了半小时的合理滥

用......我想西莉亚知道我们。

“Well, she had to know some time.”

“嗯，她得知道一段时间。”

“Everyone seems to know. My pansy friend had not been in London

twenty-four hours before he’d heard.”

“每个人似乎都知道。我的三色堇朋友在听说之前二十四小时还没

到伦敦。

“Damn everybody.”

“该死的所有人。”

“What about Rex?”

“雷克斯呢？”

“Rex isn’t anybody at all,” said Julia; “he just doesn’t exist.”

“雷克斯根本不是任何人，”朱莉娅说;“他只是不存在。”

The knives and forks jingled on the tables as we sped through the

darkness; the little circle of gin and vermouth in the glasses lengthened to

oval, contracted again, with the sway of the carriage, touched the lip, lapped

back again, never spilt; I was leaving the day behind me. Julia pulled off her

hat and tossed it into the rack above her, and shook her night-dark hair with

a little sigh of ease—a sigh fit for the pillow, the sinking firelight, and a

bedroom window open to the stars and the whisper of bare trees.

刀叉在桌子上叮叮当当地响着，我们在黑暗中飞驰;杯子里杜松子

酒和苦艾酒的小圆圈拉长成椭圆形，随着马车的摇晃再次收缩，碰到

嘴唇，又拍了拍，再也没有溢出来;我把这一天抛在脑后。茱莉亚摘下

帽子，把它扔到她头顶的架子上，轻轻地摇了摇头，轻轻地叹了口气

——这叹息适合枕头、下沉的火光和卧室的窗户，窗外是星星和光秃

秃的树木的低语。

“It’s great to have you back, Charles; like the old days.”

“你回来真是太好了，查尔斯;就像过去一样。

“Like the old days?” I thought.

“像过去一样？”我以为。

Rex, in his early forties, had grown heavy and ruddy; he had lost his

Canadian accent and acquired instead the hoarse, loud tone that was

common to all his friends, as though their voices were perpetually strained

to make themselves heard above a crowd, as though, with youth forsaking

them, there was no time to wait the opportunity to speak, no time to listen,

no time to reply; time for a laugh—a throaty mirthless laugh, the base

currency of goodwill.

四十出头的雷克斯变得沉重而红润;他失去了加拿大口音，取而代

之的是他所有朋友所共有的嘶哑、响亮的音调，仿佛他们的声音永远

紧张地在人群中被听到，仿佛随着年轻人抛弃了他们，没有时间等待

机会说话，没有时间倾听，没有时间回答;是时候开怀大笑了——一声

嘶哑的笑声，善意的基础货币。

There were half a dozen of these friends in the Tapestry Hall: politicians;

“young Conservatives” in the early forties, with sparse hair and high blood-

pressure; a Socialist from the coal-mines who had already caught their clear

accents, whose cigars came to pieces on his lips, whose hand shook when

he poured himself out a drink; a financier older than the rest, and, one might

guess from the way they treated him, richer; a love-sick columnist, who

alone was silent, gloating somberly on the only woman of the party; a

woman they called “Grizel,” a knowing rake whom, in their hearts, they all

feared a little.

挂毯大厅里有六个这样的朋友：政治家;四十出头的“年轻保守党

人”，头发稀疏，血压高;一个来自煤矿的社会党人，他已经听清了他

们清晰的口音，他的雪茄在他的嘴唇上碎了，当他给自己倒酒时，他

的手在颤抖;一个比其他人年长的金融家，而且，从他们对待他的方式

中，人们可能会猜到，他更富有;一个相思病的专栏作家，独自一人沉

默，对党内唯一的女人幸灾乐祸;一个被他们称为“格里泽尔”的女人，

一个有知识的耙子，在他们心里，他们都有点害怕。

They all feared Julia, too, Grizel included. She greeted them and

apologized for not being there to welcome them, with a formality which

hushed them for a minute; then she came and sat with me near the fire, and

the storm of talk arose once more and whirled about our ears.

他们也都害怕茱莉亚，包括格里泽尔。她向他们打招呼，并为没有

在那里欢迎他们而道歉，礼节让他们安静了一分钟;然后她走过来，和

我一起坐在火堆旁，谈话的风暴再次升起，在我们的耳边盘旋。

“Of course, he can marry her and make her queen tomorrow.”

“当然，他可以娶她，明天让她成为王后。”

“We had our chance in October. Why didn’t we send the Italian fleet to

the bottom of Mare Nostrum? Why didn’t we blow Spezia to blazes? Why

didn’t we land on Pantelleria?”

“我们在10月份有机会。我们为什么不把意大利舰队送到 Mare

Nostrum 的底部？我们为什么不把斯佩齐亚炸成大火？我们为什么不

降落在潘泰莱里亚？

“Franco’s simply a German agent. They tried to put him in to prepare air

bases to bomb France. That bluff has been called, anyway.”

“佛朗哥只是一个德国特工。他们试图让他准备轰炸法国的空军基

地。不管怎么说，这种虚张声势已经叫来了。

“It would make the monarchy stronger than it’s been since Tudor times.

The people are with him.”

“这将使君主制比都铎时代以来更强大。百姓与他同在。

“The Press are with him.”

“媒体与他同在。”

“I’m with him.”

“我和他在一起。”

“Who cares about divorce now except a few old maids who aren’t

married, anyway?”

“反正现在除了几个没结婚的老丫鬟，谁在乎离婚呢？”

“If he has a show-down with the old gang, they’ll just disappear like,

like…”

“如果他和老帮派摊牌，他们就会消失，就像......”

“Why didn’t we close the canal? Why didn’t we bomb Rome?”

“我们为什么不关闭运河？我们为什么不轰炸罗马？

“It wouldn’t have been necessary. One firm note…”

“这本来没有必要。一个坚定的音符......”

“One firm speech.”

“一个坚定的演讲。”

“One show-down.”

“一场对决。”

“Anyway, Franco will soon be skipping back to Morocco. Chap I saw

today just come from Barcelona…”

“无论如何，佛朗哥很快就会跳回摩洛哥。我今天看到的小伙子刚

从巴塞罗那过来......”

“… Chap just come from Fort Belvedere…”

"...小伙子刚从丽城堡来......”

“… Chap just come from the Palazzo Venezia…”

"...小伙子刚从威尼斯宫来......”

“All we want is a show-down.”

“我们想要的只是摊牌。”

“A show-down with Baldwin.”

“与鲍德温摊牌。”

“A show-down with Hitler.”

“与希特勒摊牌。”

“A show-down with the Old Gang.”

“与老帮摊牌。”

“… That I should live to see my country, the land of Clive and

Nelson…”

"...我应该活着看到我的国家，克莱夫和纳尔逊的土地......”

“… My country of Hawkins and Drake.”

"...我的霍金斯和德雷克国家。

“… My country of Palmerston…”

"...我的祖国帕默斯顿......”

“Would you very much mind not doing that?” said Grizel to the

columnist, who had been attempting in a maudlin manner to twist her wrist;

“I don’t happen to enjoy it.”

“你很介意不这样做吗？”格里泽尔对专栏作家说，她一直试图以一

种莫德林的方式扭动她的手腕。“我碰巧不喜欢它。”

“I wonder which is the more horrible,” I said, “Celia’s Art and Fashion or

Rex’s Politics and Money.”

“我想知道哪个更可怕，”我说，“西莉亚的艺术和时尚，还是雷克斯的

政治和金钱。

“Why worry about them?”

“为什么要担心他们？”

“Oh, my darling, why is it that love makes me hate the world? It’s

supposed to have quite the opposite effect. I feel as though all mankind, and

God, too, were in a conspiracy against us.”

“哦，亲爱的，为什么爱让我憎恨这个世界？它应该有完全相反的

效果。我觉得好像全人类，还有上帝，都在阴谋反对我们。

“They are, they are.”

“他们是，他们是。”

“But we’ve got our happiness in spite of them; here and now, we’ve

taken possession of it. They can’t hurt us, can they?”

“但尽管如此，我们还是得到了幸福;此时此地，我们已经占领了

它。他们不会伤害我们，对吧？

“Not tonight; not now.”

“今晚不行;现在不行。

“Not for how many nights?”

“不是几个晚上吗？”

Three

三

Do you remember,” said Julia, in the tranquil, lime-scented evening, “do

you remember the storm?”

你还记得吗，“茱莉亚说，在宁静的、散发着酸橙味的夜晚，”你还记

得那场暴风雨吗？”

“The bronze doors banging.”

“青铜门砰砰作响。”

“The roses in cellophane.”

“玻璃纸里的玫瑰。”

“The man who gave the “get-together” party and was never seen again.”

“那个举办'聚会'派对的人，再也没有见过。

“Do you remember how the sun came out on our last evening just as it

has done today?”

“你还记得我们昨晚的太阳是怎么出来的吗，就像今天一样？”

It had been an afternoon of low cloud and summer squalls, so overcast

that at times I had stopped work and roused Julia from the light trance in

which she sat—she had sat so often; I never tired of painting her, forever

finding in her new wealth and delicacy—until at length we had gone early

to our baths and, on coming down, dressed for dinner, in the last half-hour

of the day, we found the world transformed; the sun had emerged; the wind

had fallen to a soft breeze which gently stirred the blossom in the limes and

carried its fragrance, fresh from the late rains, to merge with the sweet

breath of box and the drying stone. The shadow of the obelisk spanned the

terrace.

那是一个阴云密布、夏日狂风大作的下午，阴沉沉的，有时我停下

手头的工作，把茱莉亚从她坐着的恍惚中叫醒——她经常坐着;我从不

厌倦地画她，永远在她新的财富和精致中寻找——直到最后，我们早

早地去洗澡，下楼时，穿好衣服吃晚饭，在一天的最后半个小时，我

们发现世界变了;太阳已经升起;风已经降为柔和的微风，轻轻地搅动

着酸橙中的花朵，带着它刚从晚雨中散发出来的香味，与盒子和干燥

的石头的甜美气息融为一体。方尖碑的阴影横跨露台。

I had carried two garden cushions from the shelter of the colonnade and

put them on the rim of the fountain. There Julia sat, in a tight little gold

tunic and a white gown, one hand in the water idly turning an emerald ring

to catch the fire of the sunset; the carved animals mounted over her dark

head in a cumulus of green moss and glowing stone and dense shadow, and

the waters round them flashed and bubbled and broke into scattered flames.

我从柱廊的庇护所里拿了两个花园垫子，把它们放在喷泉的边缘。

茱莉亚坐在那里，穿着一件紧身的金色小束腰外衣和一件白色的礼

服，一只手在水里无所事事地转动着一枚祖母绿戒指，以捕捉夕阳的

火焰;雕刻的动物在她黝黑的头上，绿色的苔藓和发光的石头和浓密的

阴影，它们周围的水闪烁着，冒着泡，碎裂成散落的火焰。

“… So much to remember,” she said. “How many days have there been

since then, when we haven’t seen each other; a hundred, do you think?”

"...要记住的东西太多了，“她说。“从那以后，我们有多少天没有见

面了;一百，你觉得呢？

“Not so many.”

“没那么多。”

“Two Christmases”—those bleak, annual excursions into propriety.

Boughton, home of my family, home of my cousin Jasper, with what glum

memories of childhood I revisited its pitch-pine corridors and dripping

walls! How querulously my father and I, seated side by side in my uncle’s

Humber, approached the avenue of Wellingtonias knowing that at the end of

the drive we should find my uncle, my aunt, my Aunt Phillippa, my cousin

Jasper, and, of recent years, Jasper’s wife and children; and besides them,

perhaps already arrived, perhaps every moment expected, my wife and my

children. This annual sacrifice united us; here among the holly and

mistletoe and the cut spruce, the parlor games ritually performed, the

brandy-butter and the Carlsbad plums, the village choir in the pitch-pine

minstrels’ gallery, gold twine and sprigged wrapping-paper, she and I were

accepted, whatever ugly rumors had been afloat in the past year, as man and

wife. “We must keep it up, whatever it costs us, for the sake of the

children,” my wife said.

“两个圣诞节”——那些凄凉的、一年一度的礼仪之旅。Boughton，

我家人的家，我表弟Jasper的家，我带着童年的阴郁回忆重温了它的松

树走廊和滴水的墙壁！我父亲和我并排坐在我叔叔的亨伯大道上，多

么奇怪地走近惠灵顿亚斯大道，知道在开车的尽头，我们应该找到我

的叔叔、我的姨妈、我的菲利帕姨妈、我的表弟贾斯珀，以及近年来

贾斯珀的妻子和孩子;除了他们之外，也许已经到了，也许每时每刻都

在期待，我的妻子和孩子。这个一年一度的牺牲将我们团结在一起;在

这里，在冬青、槲寄生和切成的云杉中，在仪式性的客厅游戏、白兰

地黄油和卡尔斯巴德李子中，在松树吟游诗人画廊里的乡村合唱团、

金麻线和枝条包装纸中，无论过去一年里有什么丑陋的谣言，她和我

都被接纳为夫妻。“为了孩子，我们必须坚持下去，不惜一切代价，”

我的妻子说。

“Yes, two Christmases…. And the three days of good taste before I

followed you to Capri.”

“是的，两个圣诞节......在我跟着你去卡普里岛之前，还有三天的好

味道。

“Our first summer.”

“我们的第一个夏天。”

“Do you remember how I hung about Naples, then followed, how we

met by arrangement on the hill path and how flat it fell?”

“你还记得我是怎么在那不勒斯徘徊的，然后跟着那不勒斯，我们

是怎样在山路上相遇的，山路有多平坦吗？”

“I went back to the villa and said, ‘Papa, who do you think has arrived at

the hotel?’ and he said, ‘Charles Ryder, I suppose.’ I said, ‘Why did you

think of him?’ and papa replied, ‘Cara came back from Paris with the news

that you and he were inseparable. He seems to have a penchant for my

children. However, bring him here; I think we have the room.’ ”

“我回到别墅说，'爸爸，你认为谁到了酒店？'他说，'查尔斯·莱

德，我想。我说，'你为什么想起他？'爸爸回答说，'卡拉从巴黎回

来，带来了你和他形影不离的消息。他似乎对我的孩子有好感。但

是，把他带到这里;我认为我们有空间。"

“There was the time you had jaundice and wouldn’t let me see you.”

“有一次你得了黄疸，不让我见你。”

“And when I had flu and you were afraid to come.”

“当我得了流感，你不敢来的时候。

“Countless visits to Rex’s constituency.”

“无数次访问雷克斯的选区。”

“And Coronation Week, when you ran away from London. Your

goodwill mission to your father-in-law. The time you went to Oxford to

paint the picture they didn’t like. Oh, yes, quite a hundred days.”

“还有加冕周，当你逃离伦敦时。你对岳父的善意使命。你去牛津

画他们不喜欢的画的时候。哦，是的，好一百天。

“A hundred days wasted out of two years and a bit… not a day’s

coldness or mistrust or disappointment.”

“两年多浪费了一百天......没有一天的冷漠、不信任或失望。

“Never that.”

“绝不是这样。”

We fell silent; only the birds spoke in a multitude of small, clear voices

in the lime-trees; only the waters spoke among their carved stones.

我们沉默了;只有鸟儿在椴树上用许多细小而清晰的声音说话;只有

水在他们雕刻的石头之间说话。

Julia took the handkerchief from my breast pocket and dried her hand;

then lit a cigarette. I feared to break the spell of memories, but for once our

thoughts had not kept pace together, for when at length Julia spoke, she said

sadly: “How many more? Another hundred?”

茱莉亚从胸前的口袋里掏出手帕擦干手;然后点燃了一支烟。我不

敢打破记忆的魔咒，但有一次，我们的思绪没有跟上步伐，因为当茱

莉亚终于开口时，她悲伤地说：“还有多少？再来一百个？

“A lifetime.”

“一辈子。”

“I want to marry you, Charles.”

“我想嫁给你，查尔斯。”

“One day; why now?”

“有一天;为什么是现在？

“War,” she said, “this year, next year, sometime soon. I want a day or

two with you of real peace.”

“战争，”她说，“今年，明年，不久的某个时候。我想和你在一起

一两天，享受真正的和平。

“Isn’t this peace?”

“这不是和平吗？”

The sun had sunk now to the line of woodland beyond the valley; all the

opposing slope was already in twilight, but the lakes below us were aflame;

the light grew in strength and splendor as it neared death, drawing long

shadows across the pasture, falling full on the rich stone spaces of the

house, firing the panes in the windows, glowing on cornices and colonnade

and dome, spreading out all the stacked merchandise of color and scent

from earth and stone and leaf, glorifying the head and golden shoulders of

the woman beside me.

太阳现在已经沉入山谷外的林地;所有对面的斜坡都已经处于暮色

中，但我们脚下的湖泊却在燃烧;当它接近死亡时，光芒变得越来越强

大和辉煌，在牧场上画出长长的阴影，完全落在房子丰富的石头空间

上，烧开窗户上的窗格，在飞檐、柱廊和圆顶上发光，散布所有堆积

的颜色和气味的商品，来自泥土、石头和树叶，赞美我身边女人的头

和金色的肩膀。

“What do you mean by “peace”, if not this?”

“如果不是这个，你说的'和平'是什么意思？”

“So much more”; and then in a chill, matter-of-fact tone she continued:

“Marriage isn’t a thing we can take when the impulse moves us. There must

be a divorce—two divorces. We must make plans.”

“还有更多”;然后，她用一种冷静的、实事求是的语气继续说：“当

冲动驱使我们时，婚姻不是我们可以接受的。必须有离婚——两次离

婚。我们必须制定计划。

“Plans, divorce, war—on an evening like this.”

“计划、离婚、战争——在这样的夜晚。

“Sometimes,” said Julia, “I feel the past and the future pressing so hard

on either side that there’s no room for the present at all.”

“有时候，”茱莉亚说，“我觉得过去和未来对任何一方都施加了很

大的压力，以至于根本没有现在的空间。

Then Wilcox came down the steps into the sunset to tell us that dinner

was ready.

然后威尔科克斯走下台阶，走到夕阳下，告诉我们晚餐已经准备好

了。

Shutters were up, curtains drawn, candles lit, in the Painted Parlour.

百叶窗拉上，窗帘拉上，蜡烛点燃，在彩绘客厅里。

“Hullo, it’s laid for three.”

“呵呵，这是三个人用的。”

“Lord Brideshead arrived half an hour ago, my lady. He sent a message

would you please not wait dinner for him as he may be a little late.”

“布里德斯黑德勋爵半小时前就到了，我的夫人。他发了一条信

息，请你不要等他吃晚饭，因为他可能有点晚了。

“It seems months since he was here last,” said Julia. “What does he do

in London?”

“距离他上次来这里似乎已经好几个月了，”朱莉娅说。“他在伦敦

做什么？”

It was often a matter for speculation between us—giving birth to many

fantasies, for Bridey was a mystery; a creature from underground; a hard-

snouted, burrowing, hibernating animal who shunned the light. He had been

completely without action in all his years of adult life; the talk of his going

into the army and into parliament and into a monastery, had all come to

nothing. All that he was known with certainty to have done—and this

because in a season of scant news it had formed the subject of a newspaper

article entitled “Peer’s Unusual Hobby”—was to form a collection of

match-boxes; he kept them mounted on boards, card-indexed, yearly

occupying a larger and larger space in his small house in Westminster. At

first he was bashful about the notoriety which the newspaper caused, but

later greatly pleased, for he found it the means of his getting into touch with

other collectors in all parts of the world with whom he now corresponded

and swapped duplicates. Other than this he was not known to have any

interests. He remained Joint-Master of the Marchmain and hunted with

them dutifully on their two days a week when he was at home; he never

hunted with the neighboring pack, who had the better country. He had no

real zest for sport, and had not been out a dozen times that season; he had

few friends; he visited his aunts; he went to public dinners held in the

Catholic interest. At Brideshead he performed all unavoidable local duties,

bringing with him to platform and fête and committee room his own thin

mist of clumsiness and aloofness.

这常常是我们之间猜测的问题——生出许多幻想，因为布莱迪是个

谜;来自地下的生物;一种坚硬的鼻子，挖洞，冬眠的动物，避开光

线。在他成年的所有岁月里，他完全没有行动;关于他参军、参议会、

进修道院的传言，都落空了。众所周知，他所做的一切——这是因为

在一个新闻匮乏的季节里，它已成为一篇题为“佩尔不寻常的爱好”的

报纸文章的主题——就是形成一个火柴盒的集合;他把它们装在木板

上，用卡片索引，每年在他位于威斯敏斯特的小房子里占据越来越大

的空间。起初，他对报纸造成的恶名感到害羞，但后来非常高兴，因

为他发现这是他与世界各地的其他收藏家取得联系的手段，他现在与

他们通信并交换副本。除此之外，他没有任何兴趣。他仍然是马奇曼

的联合主人，每周在家时，有两天尽职尽责地和他们一起打猎;他从不

和邻居一起打猎，他们拥有更好的国家。他对运动没有真正的热情，

那个赛季没有出场十几次;他几乎没有朋友;他拜访了他的阿姨;他参加

了为天主教利益举行的公共晚宴。在布里德斯黑德，他履行了所有不

可避免的地方职责，将他自己的笨拙和冷漠的薄雾带到了讲台、宴会

和会议室。

“There was a girl found strangled with a piece of barbed wire at

Wandsworth last week,” I said, reviving an old fantasy.

“上周在旺兹沃思发现一个女孩被一根铁丝网勒死，”我说，恢复了

一个古老的幻想。

“That must be Bridey. He is naughty.”

“那一定是布莱迪。他很淘气。

When we had been a quarter of an hour at the table, he joined us,

coming ponderously into the room in the bottle-green velvet smoking suit

which he kept at Brideshead and always wore when he was there. At thirty-

eight he had grown heavy and bald, and might have been taken for forty-

five.

当我们在餐桌上坐了一刻钟后，他加入了我们，穿着瓶绿色天鹅绒

吸烟服，小心翼翼地走进房间，这是他在布里德斯黑德（Brideshead）

保留的，他在那里时总是穿着。三十八岁时，他变得又重又秃，可能

被当成四十五岁。

“Well,” he said, “well, only you two; I hoped to find Rex here.”

“嗯，”他说，“嗯，只有你们两个;我希望能在这里找到雷克斯。

I often wondered what he made of me and of my continual presence; he

seemed to accept me, without curiosity, as one of the household. Twice in

the past two years he had surprised me by what seemed to be acts of

friendship; that Christmas he had sent me a photograph of himself in the

robes of a Knight of Malta, and shortly afterwards asked me to go with him

to a dining club. Both acts had an explanation: he had had more copies of

his portrait printed than he knew what to do with; he was proud of his club.

It was a surprising association of men quite eminent in their professions

who met once a month for an evening of ceremonious buffoonery; each had

his sobriquet—Bridey was called “Brother Grandee”—and a specially

designed jewel worn like an order of chivalry, symbolizing it; they had club

buttons for their waistcoats and an elaborate ritual for the introduction of

guests; after dinner a paper was read and facetious speeches were made.

There was plainly some competition to bring guests of distinction, and since

Bridey had few friends, and since I was tolerably well known, I was invited.

Even on that convivial evening I could feel my host emanating little

magnetic waves of social uneasiness, creating, rather, a pool of general

embarrassment about himself in which he floated with log-like calm.

我常常想知道他对我和我的不断存在有什么看法;他似乎毫无好奇

地接受了我，把我当成一家人。在过去的两年里，他两次以似乎是友

谊的举动让我感到惊讶;那年圣诞节，他给我发了一张他穿着马耳他骑

士长袍的照片，不久之后，他要我和他一起去一家餐饮俱乐部。这两

起事件都有一个解释：他打印的肖像副本比他不知道该如何处理的要

多;他为自己的俱乐部感到自豪。这是一个令人惊讶的协会，由在他们

的职业中相当杰出的人组成，他们每月聚会一次，参加一个隆重的丑

角之夜;每个人都有自己的绰号——布莱迪被称为“格兰迪兄弟”——还

有一颗特别设计的珠宝，像骑士勋章一样佩戴，象征着骑士精神;他们

的背心有俱乐部纽扣，介绍客人的仪式也很精致;晚饭后，大家宣读了

一份文件，并发表了精彩的演讲。显然，要带来一些杰出的客人，由

于布莱迪的朋友很少，而且由于我的名气还算大，所以我被邀请了。

即使在那个欢乐的夜晚，我也能感觉到我的主人散发出小小的社会不

安的磁波，更确切地说，是他自己普遍的尴尬，他漂浮在原木般的平

静中。

He sat down opposite me and bowed his sparse, pink head over his plate.

他在我对面坐下，低下他稀疏的粉红色头放在盘子上。

“Well, Bridey. What’s the news?”

“嗯，布莱迪。有什么消息吗？

“As a matter of fact,” he said, “I have some news. But it can wait.”

“事实上，”他说，“我有一些消息。但它可以等待。

“Tell us now.”

“现在告诉我们。”

He made a grimace which I took to mean “not in front of the servants,”

and said, “How is the painting, Charles?”

他做了个鬼脸，我以为意思是“不要在仆人面前”，然后说：“这幅

画怎么样，查尔斯？

“Which painting?”

“哪幅画？”

“Whatever you have on the stocks.”

“不管你有什么股票。”

“I began a sketch of Julia, but the light was tricky all today.”

“我开始画茱莉亚的素描，但今天光线很棘手。

“Julia? I thought you’d done her before. I suppose it’s a change from

architecture, and much more difficult.”

“茱莉亚？我以为你以前做过她。我想这是对建筑的改变，而且要

困难得多。

His conversation abounded in long pauses during which his mind

seemed to remain motionless; he always brought one back with a start to the

exact point where he had stopped. Now after more than a minute he said:

“The world is full of different subjects.”

他的谈话充满了长时间的停顿，在此期间，他的头脑似乎一动不

动;他总是把一个从他停下来的确切点开始带回来。过了一分多钟，他

说：“这个世界充满了不同的主题。

“Very true, Bridey.”

“非常正确，Bridey。”

“If I were a painter,” he said, “I should choose an entirely different

subject every time; subjects with plenty of action in them like…” Another

pause. What, I wondered was coming? The Flying Scotsman? The Charge

of the Light Brigade? Henley Regatta? Then surprisingly he said: “… like

Macbeth.” There was something supremely preposterous in the idea of

Bridey as a painter of action pictures; he was usually preposterous yet

somehow achieved a certain dignity by his remoteness and agelessness; he

was still half-child, already half-veteran; there seemed no spark of

contemporary life in him; he had a kind of massive rectitude and

impermeability, an indifference to the world, which compelled respect.

Though we often laughed at him, he was never wholly ridiculous; at times

he was even formidable.

“如果我是一名画家，”他说，“我每次都应该选择一个完全不同的

主题;他们有很多动作的对象，比如......”又停顿了一下。什么，我想知

道要来了？飞翔的苏格兰人？轻旅的冲锋？亨利帆船赛？然后令人惊

讶的是，他说：“......就像麦克白一样。布莱迪作为动作片画家的想法

是极其荒谬的。他通常是荒谬的，但不知何故，他的遥远和不老获得

了某种尊严;他还是半个孩子，已经是半个老兵了;在他身上似乎没有

当代生活的火花;他有一种巨大的正直和不可渗透性，一种对世界的漠

不关心，这迫使人们尊重。虽然我们经常嘲笑他，但他从来都不是完

全荒谬的;有时他甚至令人生畏。

We talked of the news from central Europe until, suddenly cutting across

this barren topic, Bridey asked: “Where are mummy’s jewels?”

我们谈论着来自中欧的新闻，直到突然切入这个贫瘠的话题，布莱

迪问道：“木乃伊的珠宝在哪里？

“This was hers,” said Julia, “and this. Cordelia and I had all her own

things. The family jewels went to the bank.”

“这是她的，”茱莉亚说，“还有这个。科黛莉亚和我都有她自己的

东西。家里的珠宝都去了银行。

“It’s so long since I’ve seen them—I don’t know that I ever saw them

all. What is there? Aren’t there some rather famous rubies, someone was

telling me?”

“我已经很久没见过它们了——我不知道我见过它们。那里有什

么？有人告诉我，不是有一些相当有名的红宝石吗？

“Yes, a necklace. Mummy used often to wear it, don’t you remember?

And there are the pearls—she always had those out. But most of it stayed in

the bank year after year. There are some hideous diamond fenders, I

remember, and a Victorian diamond collar no one could wear now. There’s

a mass of good stones. Why?”

“是的，一条项链。妈妈以前经常戴着它，你不记得了吗？还有珍

珠——她总是把它们拿出来。但其中大部分年复一年地留在银行里。

我记得有一些丑陋的钻石挡泥板，还有一个维多利亚时代的钻石项

圈，现在没人能戴了。有一大堆好石头。为什么？

“I’d like to have a look at them some day.”

“我想有一天看看他们。”

“I say, papa isn’t going to pop them, is he? He hasn’t got into debt

again?”

“我说，爸爸不会把它们弄破的吧？他没有再欠债了吗？

“No, no, nothing like that.”

“不，不，不是那样的。”

Bridey was a slow and copious eater. Julia and I watched him between

the candles. Presently he said: “If I was Rex”—his mind seemed full of

such suppositions: “If I was Archbishop of Westminster,” “If I was head of

the Great Western Railway,” “If I was an actress,” as though it were a mere

trick of fate that he was none of these things, and he might awake any

morning to find the matter adjusted—“if I was Rex I should want to live in

my constituency.”

布莱迪是一个缓慢而丰盛的食客。茱莉亚和我在蜡烛间看着他。现

在他说：“如果我是雷克斯”——他的脑子里似乎充满了这样的假设：

“如果我是威斯敏斯特大主教”，“如果我是大西部铁路的负责人”，“如

果我是一个女演员”，仿佛他只是命运的把戏，他不是这些东西，他可

能会在任何一个早晨醒来发现这件事已经调整好了——“如果我是雷克

斯，我应该想住在我的选区。

“Rex says it saves four days’ work a week not to.”

“雷克斯说，它每周可以节省四天的工作时间。”

“I’m sorry he’s not here. I have a little announcement to make.”

“对不起，他不在这里。我有一点要宣布。

“Bridey, don’t be so mysterious. Out with it.”

“新娘，别那么神秘。带着它出去。

He made the grimace which seemed to mean “not before the servants.”

他做了个鬼脸，似乎意味着“不在仆人面前”。

Later when port was on the table and we three were alone Julia said:

“I’m not going till I hear the announcement.”

后来，当波特在桌子上，我们三个人独自一人时，朱莉娅说：“在

我听到公告之前，我不会去。

“Well,” said Bridey, sitting back in his chair and gazing fixedly at his

glass. “You have only to wait until Monday to see it in black and white in

the newspapers. I am engaged to be married. I hope you are pleased.”

“好吧，”布莱迪说，坐回椅子上，目不转睛地盯着他的杯子。“你

只需要等到星期一，就能在报纸上看到它的黑白。我订婚了。我希望

你很高兴。

“Bridey. How… how very exciting! Who to?”

“新娘。如何。。。多么令人兴奋！给谁？

“Oh, no one you know.”

“哦，你不认识的人。”

“Is she pretty?”

“她漂亮吗？”

“I don’t think you would exactly call her pretty; ‘comely’ is the word I

think of in her connection. She is a big woman.”

“我不认为你会说她漂亮;“喜剧”是我在她的联系中想到的词。她是

个大女人。

“Fat?”

“胖子？”

“No, big. She is called Mrs. Muspratt; her Christian name is Beryl. I

have known her for a long time, but until last year she had a husband; now

she is a widow. Why do you laugh?”

“不，大。她被称为穆斯普拉特夫人;她的基督教名字是Beryl。我认

识她很久了，但直到去年她才有了丈夫;现在她是个寡妇。你为什么

笑？

“I’m sorry. It isn’t the least funny. It’s just so unexpected. Is she… is she

about your own age?”

“对不起。这还不是最不好笑的。这太出乎意料了。难道她...她和你

差不多大吗？

“Just about, I believe. She has three children, the eldest boy has just

gone to Ampleforth. She is not at all well off.”

“差不多，我相信。她有三个孩子，大男孩刚刚去了Ampleforth。她

一点也不富裕。

“But, Bridey, where did you find her?”

“可是，布莱迪，你在哪里找到她的？”

“Her late husband, Admiral Muspratt, collected match-boxes,” he said

with complete gravity.

“她已故的丈夫穆斯普拉特海军上将收集了火柴盒，”他语重心长地

说。

Julia trembled on the verge of laughter, recovered her self-possession,

and asked: “You’re not marrying her for her match-boxes?”

茱莉亚笑得浑身发抖，回过神来，问道：“你嫁给她不是为了她的

火柴盒吗？

“No, no; the whole collection was left to the Falmouth Town Library. I

have a great affection for her. In spite of all her difficulties she is a very

cheerful woman, very fond of acting. She is connected with the Catholic

Players’ Guild.”

“不，不;整个藏品都留给了法尔茅斯镇图书馆。我对她很有感情。

尽管她遇到了种种困难，但她是一个非常开朗的女人，非常喜欢表

演。她与天主教球员公会有联系。

“Does papa know?”

“爸爸知道吗？”

“I had a letter from him this morning giving me his approval. He has

been urging me to marry for some time.”

“今天早上我收到了他的一封信，给了我他的批准。一段时间以

来，他一直在催促我结婚。

It occurred both to Julia and myself simultaneously that we were

allowing curiosity and surprise to predominate; now we congratulated him

in gentler tones from which mockery was almost excluded.

茱莉亚和我同时意识到，我们让好奇心和惊喜占主导地位;现在我

们用更温和的语气向他表示祝贺，几乎排除了嘲弄。

“Thank you,” he said, “thank you. I think I am very fortunate.”

“谢谢你，”他说，“谢谢你。我觉得我很幸运。

“But when are we going to meet her? I do think you might have brought

her down with you.”

“但是我们什么时候去见她呢？我确实认为你可能把她带走了。

He said nothing, sipped and gazed.

他什么也没说，抿了一口，凝视着。

“Bridey,” said Julia. “You sly, smug old brute, why haven’t you brought

her here?”

“布莱迪，”朱莉娅说。“你这个狡猾、自鸣得意的老畜生，你为什

么不把她带到这里来？”

“Oh, I couldn’t do that, you know.”

“哦，我做不到，你知道的。”

“Why couldn’t you? I’m dying to meet her. Let’s ring her up now and

invite her. She’ll think us most peculiar leaving her alone at a time like

this.”

“你为什么不能？我很想见到她。现在让我们给她打电话并邀请

她。她会认为我们最奇怪的是，在这种时候让她一个人呆着。

“She has the children,” said Brideshead. “Besides, you are peculiar,

aren’t you?”

“她有孩子，”布里德斯黑德说。“再说了，你很奇特，不是吗？”

“What can you mean?”

“你什么意思？”

Brideshead raised his head and looked solemnly at his sister, and

continued in the same simple way, as though he were saying nothing

particularly different from what had gone before, “I couldn’t ask her here,

as things are. It wouldn’t be suitable. After all, I am a lodger here. This is

Rex’s house at the moment, so far as it’s anybody’s. What goes on here is

his business. But I couldn’t bring Beryl here.”

布莱德斯海德抬起头，严肃地看着他的妹妹，然后以同样简单的方

式继续说下去，仿佛他说的和之前没有什么特别的不同，“我不能在这

里问她，就像现在这样。这不合适。毕竟，我是这里的房客。这是雷

克斯现在的房子，就任何人而言。这里发生的事情是他的事。但我不

能把Beryl带到这里来。

“I simply don’t understand,” said Julia rather sharply. I looked at her. All

the gentle mockery had gone; she was alert, almost scared, it seemed. “Of

course, Rex and I want her to come.”

“我简直不明白，”茱莉亚相当尖锐地说。我看着她。所有温柔的嘲

弄都消失了;她很警觉，似乎很害怕。“当然，我和雷克斯希望她来。”

“Oh, yes, I don’t doubt that. The difficulty is quite otherwise.” He

finished his port, refilled his glass, and pushed the decanter towards me.

“You must understand that Beryl is a woman of strict Catholic principle

fortified by the prejudices of the middle class. I couldn’t possibly bring her

here. It is a matter of indifference whether you choose to live in sin with

Rex or Charles or both—I have always avoided inquiry into the details of

your ménage—but in no case would Beryl consent to be your guest.”

“哦，是的，我不怀疑。困难在于完全不同。他喝完了酒，重新装

满了杯子，然后把醒酒器推到我面前。“你必须明白，贝丽尔是一个严

格遵守天主教原则的女人，受到中产阶级偏见的强化。我不可能把她

带到这里来。无论你选择和雷克斯还是查尔斯，或者两者兼而有之，

都无关紧要——我一直避免询问你的细节——但在任何情况下，贝丽

尔都不会同意成为你的客人。

Julia rose. “Why, you pompous ass…” she said, stopped, and turned

towards the door.

茱莉亚站了起来。“哎呀，你这个自负的混蛋......”她说着，停了下

来，转身朝门口走去。

At first I thought she was overcome by laughter; then, as I opened the

door to her, I saw with consternation that she was in tears. I hesitated. She

slipped past me without a glance.

起初我以为她被笑声征服了;然后，当我向她打开门时，我惊愕地

看到她正在流泪。我犹豫了。她看都没看我一眼就从我身边溜走了。

“I may have given the impression that this was a marriage of

convenience,” Brideshead continued placidly. “I cannot speak for Beryl; no

doubt the security of my position has some influence on her. Indeed, she has

said as much. But for myself, let me emphasize, I am ardently attracted.”

“我可能给人的印象是，这是一场权宜之计的婚姻，”布里德斯黑德

平静地继续说道。“我不能为Beryl说话;毫无疑问，我职位的安全感对

她有一定的影响。事实上，她已经说了这么多。但就我自己而言，让

我强调一下，我被强烈地吸引住了。

“Bridey, what a bloody offensive thing to say to Julia!”

“布莱迪，对茱莉亚说这是多么血腥的冒犯！”

“There was nothing she should object to. I was merely stating a fact well

known to her.”

“她没有什么应该反对的。我只是在陈述一个她所熟知的事实。

She was not in the library; I mounted to her room, but she was not there. I

paused by her laden dressing table wondering if she would come. Then

through the open window, as the light streamed out across the terrace into

the dusk, to the fountain which in that house seemed always to draw us to

itself for comfort and refreshment, I caught the glimpse of a white skirt

against the stones. It was nearly night. I found her in the darkest refuge, on

a wooden seat, in a bay of the clipped box which encircled the basin. I took

her in my arms and she pressed her face to my heart.

她不在图书馆;我爬到她的房间，但她不在那里。我在她满满的梳妆台

前停了下来，想知道她会不会来。然后透过敞开的窗户，当光线穿过

露台进入黄昏时，流向喷泉，在那所房子里，喷泉似乎总是吸引我们

到自己身边来安慰和提神，我瞥见一条白色的裙子靠在石头上。快到

晚上了。我发现她在最黑暗的避难所里，在一个木椅上，在环绕盆子

的夹子的盒子的海湾里。我把她抱在怀里，她把脸贴在我的心上。

“Aren’t you cold out here?”

“你在这里不冷吗？”

She did not answer, only clung closer to me, and shook with sobs.

她没有回答，只是紧紧地抱住我，抽泣着颤抖着。

“My darling, what is it? Why do you mind? What does it matter what

that old booby says?”

“亲爱的，这是什么？你为什么介意？那个老家伙说什么有什么关

系？

“I don’t; it doesn’t. It’s just the shock. Don’t laugh at me.”

“我不;事实并非如此。这只是震惊。别嘲笑我。

In the two years of our love, which seemed a lifetime, I had not seen her

so moved or felt so powerless to help.

在我们相爱的两年里，似乎是一辈子，我从未见过她如此感动，也

从未感到如此无能为力。

“How dare he speak to you like that?” I said. “The cold-blooded old

humbug…” But I was failing her in sympathy.

“他怎么敢这样跟你说话？”我说过。“冷血的老笨蛋......”但我在同

情上辜负了她。

“No,” she said, “it’s not that. He’s quite right. They know all about it,

Bridey and his widow; they’ve got it in black and white; they bought it for a

penny at the church door. You can get anything there for a penny, in black

and white, and nobody to see that you pay; only an old woman with a

broom at the other end, rattling round the confessionals, and a young

woman lighting a candle at the Seven Dolours. Put a penny in the box, or

not, just as you like; take your tract. There you’ve got it, in black and white.

“不，”她说，“不是那样的。他说得很对。他们都知道这件事，布

莱迪和他的遗孀;他们有黑白分明的;他们在教堂门口花了一分钱买了

它。你可以花一分钱买到任何东西，黑白分明，没有人看到你付钱;只

有一位老妇人拿着扫帚在忏悔室周围嘎嘎作响，还有一位年轻女子在

七大教堂点燃蜡烛。在盒子里放一分钱，或者不放一分钱，随心所欲;

拿走你的小册子。你有它，黑白的。

“All in one word, too, one little, flat, deadly word that covers a lifetime.

“总而言之，也是一个小小的、平淡的、致命的词，涵盖了一生。

“ ‘Living in sin’; not just doing wrong, as I did when I went to America;

doing wrong, knowing it is wrong, stopping doing it, forgetting. That’s not

what they mean. That’s not Bridey’s pennyworth. He means just what it

says in black and white.

“'活在罪恶中';不仅仅是做错了，就像我去美国时所做的那样;做错

了，明知是错的，停止做，忘记。这不是他们的意思。那不是布莱迪

的一分钱。他的意思就是它白纸黑字的意思。

“Living in sin, with sin, always the same, like an idiot child carefully

nursed, guarded from the world. ‘Poor Julia,’ they say, ‘she can’t go out.

She’s got to take care of her sin. A pity it ever lived,’ they say, ‘but it’s so

strong. Children like that always are. Julia’s so good to her little, mad sin.’ ”

“活在罪恶中，带着罪恶，总是一样的，就像一个被精心呵护的白

痴孩子，被世俗保护着。'可怜的茱莉亚，“他们说，”她不能出去。她

必须照顾好自己的罪孽。可惜它曾经活过，“他们说，”但它是如此强

大。这样的孩子总是这样。茱莉亚对她那小小的、疯狂的罪孽真是太

好了。"

“An hour ago,” I thought, “under the sunset, she sat turning her ring in

the water and counting the days of happiness; now under the first stars and

the last gray whisper of day, all this mysterious tumult of sorrow! What had

happened to us in the Painted Parlour? What shadow had fallen in the

candlelight? Two rough sentences and a trite phrase.” She was beside

herself; her voice, now muffled in my breast, now clear and anguished,

came to me in single words and broken sentences.

“一个小时前，”我想，“在夕阳下，她坐在水里转动她的戒指，数

着幸福的日子;现在，在第一颗星星和白昼的最后一声灰色低语下，所

有这些神秘的悲伤喧嚣！我们在彩绘客厅里发生了什么事？烛光下落

下了什么影子？两句粗话和一个陈词滥调。她在自己身边;她的声音，

现在在我的胸膛里闷闷不乐，现在清晰而痛苦，用一个字和一个破碎

的句子传到我面前。

“Past and future; the years when I was trying to be a good wife, in the

cigar smoke, while the counters clicked on the backgammon board, and the

man who was ‘dummy’ at the men’s table filled the glasses; when I was

trying to bear his child, torn in pieces by something already dead; putting

him away, forgetting him, finding you, the past two years with you, all the

future with you, all the future with or without you, war coming, world

ending—sin.

“过去和未来;那些年，我努力做一个好妻子，在雪茄烟雾中，当计

数器在西洋双陆棋盘上咔哒作响时，男桌上“假人”的男人斟满了酒杯;

当我试图怀上他的孩子时，他被已经死去的东西撕成碎片;把他抛弃，

忘记他，找到你，过去两年和你在一起，所有的未来和你在一起，所

有的未来有或没有你，战争来临，世界末日——罪恶。

“A word from so long ago, from Nanny Hawkins stitching by the hearth

and the nightlight burning before the Sacred Heart. Cordelia and me with

the catechism, in mummy’s room, before luncheon on Sundays. Mummy

carrying my sin with her to church, bowed under it and the black lace veil,

in the chapel; slipping out with it in London before the fires were lit; taking

it with her through the empty streets, where the milkman’s ponies stood

with their forefeet on the pavement; mummy dying with my sin eating at

her, more cruelly than her own deadly illness.

“很久以前的一句话，来自保姆霍金斯在壁炉旁缝合和圣心前燃烧

的夜灯。科黛莉亚和我带着教理问答，在妈妈的房间里，星期天午餐

前。妈妈带着我的罪孽去教堂，在教堂里鞠躬，戴着黑色蕾丝面纱;在

大火点燃之前在伦敦溜出去;带着它穿过空荡荡的街道，送奶工的小马

前脚踩在人行道上;妈妈死了，我的罪孽吞噬了她，比她自己的致命疾

病更残酷。

“Mummy dying with it; Christ dying with it, nailed hand and foot;

hanging over the bed in the night-nursery; hanging year after year in the

dark little study at Farm Street with the shining oilcloth; hanging in the dark

church where only the old charwoman raises the dust and one candle burns;

hanging at noon, high among the crowds and the soldiers; no comfort

except a sponge of vinegar and the kind words of a thief; hanging for ever;

never the cool sepulcher and the grave clothes spread on the stone slab,

never the oil and spices in the dark cave; always the midday sun and the

dice clicking for the seamless coat.

“妈妈和它一起死了;基督与它一起死去，手脚被钉住;挂在夜托儿所

的床上;年复一年地挂在农场街黑暗的小书房里，挂着闪闪发光的油

布;挂在黑暗的教堂里，只有老女仆扬起灰尘，一根蜡烛燃烧;中午悬

挂，高高在上，在人群和士兵中;除了一块醋和小偷的好话，没有安

慰;永远悬而未决;绝不是铺在石板上的清凉的坟墓和坟墓的衣服，绝

不是黑暗洞穴中的油和香料;总是正午的阳光和骰子咔哒咔哒地为无缝

外套。

“No way back; the gates barred; all the saints and angels posted along

the walls. Thrown away, scrapped, rotting down; the old man with lupus

and the forked stick who limps out at nightfall to turn the rubbish, hoping

for something to put in his sack, something marketable, turns away with

disgust.

“没有回头路;大门被挡住了;所有的圣徒和天使都张贴在墙上。扔

掉，报废，腐烂;那个患有狼疮和叉棍的老人在夜幕降临时一瘸一拐地

出去翻垃圾，希望有什么东西可以放进他的袋子里，一些有市场的东

西，厌恶地转身离开。

“Nameless and dead, like the baby they wrapped up and took away

before I had seen her.”

“无名无姓，死了，就像他们在我见到她之前把她包起来带走的婴

儿一样。”

Between her tears she talked herself into silence. I could do nothing; I

was adrift in a strange sea; my hands on the metal-spun threads of her tunic

were cold and stiff, my eyes dry; I was as far from her in spirit, as she clung

to me in the darkness, as when years ago I had lit her cigarette on the way

from the station; as far as when she was out of mind, in the dry, empty years

at the Old Rectory, and in the jungle.

在她的眼泪之间，她让自己沉默了。我什么也做不了;我漂泊在陌

生的大海中;我的手放在她外衣的金属纺线上，又冷又僵硬，眼睛干

涩;我在精神上离她很远，就像她在黑暗中紧紧抓住我一样，就像几年

前我在从车站回来的路上点燃了她的香烟一样;至于她失去理智的时

候，在老教区干燥、空旷的岁月里，在丛林里。

Tears spring from speech; presently in her silence her weeping stopped.

She sat up, away from me, took my handkerchief, shivered, rose to her feet.

泪水从言语中涌出;现在，在她的沉默中，她的哭泣停止了。她坐

了起来，远离我，拿起我的手帕，颤抖着站了起来。

“Well,” she said, in a voice much like normal. “Bridey is one for

bombshells, isn’t he?”

“嗯，”她说，声音很像平常。“布莱迪是一个重磅炸弹，不是吗？”

I followed her into the house and to her room; she sat at her looking-

glass. “Considering that I’ve just recovered from a fit of hysteria,” she said,

“I don’t call that at all bad.” Her eyes seemed unnaturally large and bright,

her cheeks pale with two spots of high color, where, as a girl, she used to

put a dab of rouge. “Most hysterical women look as if they had a bad cold.

You’d better change your shirt before going down; it’s all tears and

lipstick.”

我跟着她进了屋，回到了她的房间。她坐在镜子前。“考虑到我刚

刚从歇斯底里中恢复过来，”她说，“我一点也不认为这很糟糕。她的

眼睛看起来不自然地又大又亮，她的脸颊苍白，有两个颜色鲜艳的斑

点，作为一个女孩，她曾经涂过一点胭脂。“大多数歇斯底里的女人看

起来好像得了重感冒。你最好在下山前换上衬衫;全是眼泪和口红。

“Are we going down?”

“我们要下去吗？”

“Of course, we mustn’t leave poor Bridey on his engagement night.”

“当然，我们不能把可怜的布莱迪留在他的订婚之夜。

When I went back to her she said: “I’m sorry for that appalling scene,

Charles. I can’t explain.”

当我回到她身边时，她说：“我为那骇人听闻的一幕感到抱歉，查

尔斯。我无法解释。

Brideshead was in the library, smoking his pipe, placidly reading a

detective story.

布里德斯黑德在图书馆里，抽着烟斗，平静地读着一个侦探故事。

“Was it nice out? If I’d known you were going I’d have come, too.”

“出去好吗？如果我知道你要去，我也会来的。

“Rather cold.”

“挺冷的。”

“I hope it’s not going to be inconvenient for Rex moving out of here.

You see, Barton Street is much too small for us and the three children.

Besides, Beryl likes the country. In his letter papa proposed making over

the whole estate right away.”

“我希望雷克斯搬出这里不会带来不便。你看，巴顿街对我们和三

个孩子来说太小了。此外，Beryl喜欢这个国家。爸爸在信中提议立即

把整个庄园都收回来。

I remembered how Rex had greeted me on my first arrival at Brideshead

as Julia’s guest. “A very happy arrangement,” he had said. “Suits me down

to the ground. The old boy keeps the place up; Bridey does all the feudal

stuff with the tenants; I have the run of the house rent free. All it costs me is

the food and the wages of the indoor servants. Couldn’t ask fairer than that,

could you?”

我记得雷克斯在我第一次作为茱莉亚的客人来到布里德斯黑德时是

如何迎接我的。“一个非常愉快的安排，”他说。“适合我到地上。老男

孩把这个地方打理得井井有条;布莱迪和佃户一起做所有封建的事情;

我有免费的房子租金。我所付出的只是食物和室内仆人的工资。没有

比这更公平的了，对吧？

“I should think he’ll be sorry to go,” I said.

“我应该认为他会后悔离开，”我说。

“Oh, he’ll find another bargain somewhere,” said Julia; “trust him.”

“哦，他会在某个地方找到另一个便宜货，”朱莉娅说;“相信他。”

“Beryl’s got some furniture of her own she’s very attached to. I don’t

know if it would go very well here. You know, oak dressers and coffin

stools and things. I thought she could put it in mummy’s old room.”

“Beryl有一些她自己的家具，她非常依恋。我不知道这里会不会很

顺利。你知道，橡木梳妆台和棺材凳子之类的东西。我以为她可以把

它放在妈妈的旧房间里。

“Yes, that would be the place.”

“是的，就是那个地方。”

So brother and sister sat and talked about the arrangement of the house

until bed-time. “An hour ago,” I thought, “in the black refuge in the box

hedge, she wept her heart out for the death of her God; now she is

discussing whether Beryl’s children shall take the old smoking-room or the

school-room for their own.” I was all at sea.

于是，兄妹俩坐下来，谈论着家里的布置，直到睡觉前。“一个小

时前，”我想，“在箱形篱笆的黑色避难所里，她为她的上帝的死而哭

泣;现在她正在讨论Beryl的孩子们是否应该把旧的吸烟室或学校的房间

据为己有。我都在海上。

“Julia,” I said later, when Brideshead had gone upstairs, “have you ever

seen a picture of Holman Hunt’s called “The Awakened Conscience”?”

“茱莉亚，”我后来在布里德斯黑德上楼时说，“你看过霍尔曼·亨特

的《觉醒的良心》吗？

“No.”

“没有。”

I had seen a copy of Pre-Raphaelitism in the library some days before; I

found it again and read her Ruskin’s description. She laughed quite happily.

几天前，我在图书馆里看到了一本拉斐尔前主义;我又找到了它，

并阅读了她的拉斯金的描述。她笑得很开心。

“You’re perfectly right. That’s exactly what I did feel.”

“你说得很对。这正是我的感受。

“But, darling, I won’t believe that great spout of tears came just from a

few words of Bridey’s. You must have been thinking about it before.”

“可是，亲爱的，我不相信布莱迪的几句话就流下了巨大的眼泪。

你以前一定想过这个问题。

“Hardly at all; now and then; more, lately, with the Last Trump so near.”

“几乎没有;时不时地;最近，随着最后的特朗普如此接近。

“Of course it’s a thing psychologists could explain; a preconditioning

from childhood; feelings of guilt from the nonsense you were taught in the

nursery. You do know at heart that it’s all bosh, don’t you?”

“当然，这是心理学家可以解释的事情;童年时期的预处理;你在托儿

所教的胡说八道的内疚感。你心里知道这都是嘘声，不是吗？

“How I wish it was!”

“我多么希望是这样！”

“Sebastian once said almost the same thing to me.”

“塞巴斯蒂安曾经对我说过几乎同样的话。

“He’s gone back to the Church, you know. Of course, he never left it as

definitely as I did. I’ve gone too far; there’s no turning back now; I know

that, if that’s what you mean by thinking it all bosh. All I can hope to do is

to put my life in some sort of order in a human way, before all human order

comes to an end. That’s why I want to marry you. I should like to have a

child. That’s one thing I can do…. Let’s go out again. The moon should be

up by now.”

“他回到教会了，你知道的。当然，他从来没有像我那样明确地离

开它。我走得太远了;现在没有回头路了;我知道，如果这就是你认为

这一切的意思。我所能做的就是在所有人类秩序结束之前，以人类的

方式将我的生活整理成某种秩序。这就是我想娶你的原因。我想要一

个孩子。这是我能做的一件事......我们再出去一次。月亮现在应该已经

升起来了。

The moon was full and high. We walked round the house; under the

limes Julia paused and idly snapped off one of the long shoots, last year’s

growth, that fringed their boles, and stripped it as she walked, making a

switch, as children do, but with petulant movements that were not a child’s,

snatching nervously at the leaves and crumbling them between her fingers;

she began peeling the bark, scratching it with her nails.

月亮又圆又高。我们在房子里走来走去;在椴树下，茱莉亚停了下

来，漫不经心地折断了一根长长的嫩芽，那是去年长出来的，它环绕

着它们的枝条，边走边剥去，像孩子一样做了一个开关，但动作不是

孩子的，紧张地抓着叶子，把它们捏碎在她的手指间;她开始剥树皮，

用指甲刮它。

Once more we stood by the fountain.

我们又一次站在喷泉旁。

“It’s like the setting of a comedy,” I said. “Scene: a Baroque fountain in

a nobleman’s grounds. Act one, sunset; act two, dusk; act three, moonlight.

The characters keep assembling at the fountain for no very clear reason.”

“这就像喜剧的背景，”我说。“场景：贵族院子里的巴洛克式喷

泉。第一幕，日落;第二幕，黄昏;第三幕，月光。角色们无缘无故地

聚集在喷泉前。

“Comedy?”

“喜剧？”

“Drama. Tragedy. Farce. What you will. This is the reconciliation

scene.”

“戏剧。悲剧。闹剧。你会的。这就是和解的场景。

“Was there a quarrel?”

“吵架了吗？”

“Estrangement and misunderstanding in act two.”

“第二幕中的隔阂和误解。”

“Oh, don’t talk in that damned bounderish way. Why must you see

everything second-hand? Why must this be a play? Why must my

conscience be a pre-Raphaelite picture?”

“哦，别用那种该死的笨蛋说话。为什么你必须看到所有二手的东

西？为什么这一定是一出戏？为什么我的良心一定是一幅拉斐尔前派

的图画？

“It’s a way I have.”

“这是我的一种方式。”

“I hate it.”

“我讨厌它。”

Her anger was as unexpected as every change on this evening of swift

veering moods. Suddenly she cut me across the face with her switch, a

vicious, stinging little blow as hard as she could strike.

她的愤怒是出乎意料的，就像这个晚上情绪迅速转变的每一个变化

一样。突然，她用她的开关在我的脸上划了一刀，一个恶毒的、刺痛

的小打击，她尽可能地打击。

“Now do you see how I hate it?”

“现在你明白我有多讨厌它了吗？”

She hit me again.

她又打了我。

“All right,” I said, “go on.”

“好吧，”我说，“继续。

Then, though her hand was raised, she stopped and threw the half-peeled

wand into the water, where it floated white and black in the moonlight.

然后，虽然她举起了手，但她停了下来，把剥了一半的魔杖扔进水

里，在月光下漂浮着黑白相间的魔杖。

“Did that hurt?”

“疼吗？”

“Yes.”

“是的。”

“Did it?…. Did I?”

“是吗?....是吗？

In the instant her rage was gone; her tears, newly flowing, were on my

cheek. I held her at arm’s length and she put down her head, stroking my

hand on her shoulder with her face, cat-like, but, unlike a cat, leaving a tear

there.

在那一刻，她的愤怒消失了;她的眼泪，刚刚流下来，在我的脸颊

上。我抱着她，她低下头，用我的手抚摸着她的肩膀，她的脸像猫，

但不像猫，在那里留下了眼泪。

“Cat on the roof-top,” I said.

“屋顶上的猫，”我说。

“Beast!”

“野兽！”

She bit at my hand, but when I did not move it and her teeth touched me,

she changed the bite to a kiss, the kiss to a lick of her tongue.

她咬了我的手，但当我没有动它，她的牙齿碰到我时，她把咬变成

了吻，吻变成了舔舌头。

“Cat in the moonlight.”

“月光下的猫。”

This was the mood I knew. We turned towards the house. When we

came to the lighted hall she said: “Your poor face,” touching the weals with

her fingers. “Will there be a mark tomorrow?”

这就是我所知道的心情。我们转身朝房子走去。当我们来到灯火通

明的大厅时，她说：“你可怜的脸，”用手指抚摸着伤口。明天会有标

记吗？

“I expect so.”

“我期待如此。”

“Charles, am I going crazy? What’s happened tonight? I’m so tired.”

“查尔斯，我疯了吗？今晚发生了什么？我太累了。

She yawned; a fit of yawning took her. She sat at her dressing table,

head bowed, hair over her face, yawning helplessly, when she looked up I

saw over her shoulder in the glass a face that was dazed with weariness like

a retreating soldier’s, and beside it my own, streaked with two crimson

lines.

她打了个哈欠;一阵哈欠把她带走了。她坐在梳妆台前，低着头，

头发遮住脸，无助地打了个哈欠，当她抬起头时，我看到玻璃杯里她

肩膀上有一张疲惫的脸，像一个撤退的士兵一样，在它旁边，有两条

深红色的线条。

“So tired,” she repeated, taking off her gold tunic and letting it fall to the

floor, “tired and crazy and good for nothing.”

“太累了，”她重复了一遍，脱下她的金色外衣，让它掉在地上，

“累了，疯了，一无是处。

I saw her to bed; the blue lids fell over her eyes; her pale lips moved on

the pillow, but whether to wish me good night or to murmur a prayer—a

jingle of the nursery that came to her now in the twilight world between

sorrow and sleep: some ancient pious rhyme that had come down to Nanny

Hawkins from centuries of bedtime whispering, through all the changes of

language, from the days of pack-horses on the Pilgrim’s Way—I did not

know.

我看到她上床睡觉;蓝色的眼睑落在她的眼睛上;她苍白的嘴唇在枕

头上动了动，但无论是祝我晚安，还是喃喃祈祷——现在在悲伤和睡

眠之间的暮色世界里，她听到了托儿所的叮当声：一些古老的虔诚的

韵律，从几个世纪的睡前耳语中传到南尼·霍金斯那里，通过语言的所

有变化，从朝圣者之路上的驮马时代开始——我不知道。

Next night Rex and his political associates were with us.

第二天晚上，雷克斯和他的政治伙伴和我们在一起。

“They won’t fight.”

“他们不会打架。”

“They can’t fight. They haven’t the money; they haven’t the oil.”

“他们不能打架。他们没有钱;他们没有石油。

“They haven’t the wolfram; they haven’t the men.”

“他们没有 wolfram;他们没有男人。

“They haven’t the guts.”

“他们没有胆量。”

“They’re afraid.”

“他们害怕。”

“Scared of the French; scared of the Czechs; scared of the Slovaks;

scared of us.”

“害怕法国人;害怕捷克人;害怕斯洛伐克人;害怕我们。

“It’s a bluff.”

“这是虚张声势。”

“Of course it’s a bluff. Where’s their tungsten? Where’s their

manganese?”

“当然是虚张声势。他们的钨在哪里？他们的锰在哪里？

“Where’s their chrome?”

“他们的铬在哪儿？”

“I’ll tell you a thing…”

“我告诉你一件事......”

“Listen to this; it’ll be good; Rex will tell you a thing.”

“听着这个;会好起来的;雷克斯会告诉你一件事。

“… Friend of mine motoring in the Black Forest, only the other day, just

came back and told me about it while we played a round of golf. Well, this

friend driving along, turned down a lane into the high road. What should he

find but a military convoy? Couldn’t stop, drove right into it, smack into a

tank, broadside on. Gave himself up for dead…. Hold on, this is the funny

part.”

"...就在前几天，我的朋友在黑森林开车，在我们打高尔夫球时回来

告诉我这件事。好吧，这位朋友开车，拐进了一条车道。除了军事车

队，他还能找到什么？停不下来，直接开进去，撞上了一辆坦克，舷

侧。自首等死......等一下，这是有趣的部分。

“This is the funny part.”

“这是有趣的部分。”

“Drove clean through it, didn’t scratch his paint. What do you think? It

was made of canvas—a bamboo frame and painted canvas.”

“开车干干净净，没有划伤他的油漆。你觉得怎么样？它是用帆布

做的——一个竹框和彩绘帆布。

“They haven’t the steel.”

“他们没有钢铁。”

“They haven’t the tools. They haven’t the labor. They’re half starving.

They haven’t the fats. The children have rickets.”

“他们没有工具。他们没有劳动力。他们饿得半死。他们没有脂

肪。孩子们得了佝偻病。

“The women are barren.”

“女人不孕不育。”

“The men are impotent.”

“男人是无能为力的。”

“They haven’t the doctors.”

“他们没有医生。”

“The doctors were Jewish.”

“医生是犹太人。”

“Now they’ve got consumption.”

“现在他们有消费了。”

“Now they’ve got syphilis.”

“现在他们得了梅毒。”

“Goering told a friend of mine…”

“戈林告诉我的一个朋友......”

“Goebbels told a friend of mine…”

“戈培尔告诉我的一个朋友......”

“Ribbentrop told me that the army just kept Hitler in power so long as

he was able to get things for nothing. The moment anyone stands up to him,

he’s finished. The army will shoot him.”

“里宾特洛甫告诉我，只要希特勒能够不劳而获，军队就会继续掌

权。当有人站出来反对他的那一刻，他就完蛋了。军队会开枪打死

他。

“The Liberals will hang him.”

“自由党会绞死他。”

“The Communists will tear him limb from limb.”

“共产党人会把他撕成碎片。”

“He’ll scupper himself.”

“他会自暴自弃的。”

“He’d do it now if it wasn’t for Chamberlain.”

“如果不是张伯伦，他现在会这样做。

“If it wasn’t for Halifax.”

“如果不是哈利法克斯。”

“If it wasn’t for Sir Samuel Hoare.”

“如果不是塞缪尔·霍尔爵士的话。”

“And the 1922 Committee.”

“还有1922年委员会。”

“Peace Pledge.”

“和平誓言。”

“Foreign Office.”

“外交部。”

“New York Banks.”

“纽约银行。”

“All that’s wanted is a good strong line.”

“我们想要的只是一条好的强线。”

“A line from Rex.”

“雷克斯的一句台词。”

“And a line from me.”

“还有我的一句话。”

“We’ll give Europe a good strong line. Europe is waiting for a speech

from Rex.”

“我们将给欧洲一个很好的强线。欧洲正在等待雷克斯的演讲。

“And a speech from me.”

“还有我的演讲。”

“And a speech from me. Rally the freedom-loving peoples of the world.

Germany will rise; Austria will rise. The Czechs and the Slovaks are bound

to rise.”

“还有我的演讲。团结全世界热爱自由的人民。德国将崛起;奥地利

将崛起。捷克人和斯洛伐克人必将崛起。

“To a speech from Rex and a speech from me.”

“雷克斯的演讲和我的演讲。”

“What about a rubber? How about a whisky? Which of you chaps will

have a big cigar? Hullo, you two going out?”

“橡胶呢？威士忌怎么样？你们谁会抽大雪茄？胡洛，你们俩要出

去吗？

“Yes, Rex,” said Julia. “Charles and I are going into the moonlight.”

“是的，雷克斯，”茱莉亚说。“查尔斯和我要进入月光下。”

We shut the windows behind us and the voices ceased; the moonlight lay

like hoar-frost on the terrace and the music of the fountain crept in our ears;

the stone balustrade of the terrace might have been the Trojan walls, and in

the silent park might have stood the Grecian tents where Cressid lay that

night.

我们关上身后的窗户，声音停止了;月光像白霜一样躺在露台上，

喷泉的音乐悄悄地进入我们的耳朵;露台的石栏杆可能是特洛伊城墙，

在寂静的公园里可能矗立着克雷西德那天晚上躺着的希腊帐篷。

“A few days, a few months.”

“几天，几个月。”

“No time to be lost.”

“没有时间可以浪费了。”

“A lifetime between the rising of the moon and its setting. Then the

dark.”

“从月亮升起到落下之间的一生。然后是黑暗。

Four

四

And of course Celia will have custody of the children.”

当然，西莉亚将拥有孩子的监护权。

Of course.”

答案是肯定的。

“Then what about the Old Rectory? I don’t imagine you’ll want to settle

down with Julia bang at our gates. The children look on it as their home,

you know. Robin’s got no place of his own till his uncle dies. After all, you

never used the studio, did you? Robin was saying only the other day what a

good play-room it would make—big enough for Badminton.”

“那老教区呢？我不认为你会想和朱莉娅在我们的门口安顿下来。

孩子们把这里当成他们的家，你知道的。罗宾没有自己的位置，直到

他的叔叔去世。毕竟，你从来没有使用过工作室，是吗？罗宾前几天

还说过，这将是一个多么好的游戏室——足够大，可以打羽毛球。

“Robin can have the Old Rectory.”

“罗宾可以拥有老教区长。”

“Now with regard to money, Celia and Robin naturally don’t want to

accept anything for themselves, but there’s the question of the children’s

education.”

“现在说到钱，西莉亚和罗宾自然不想为自己接受什么，但有孩子

的教育问题。”

“That will be all right. I’ll see the lawyers about it.”

“那就没事了。我会去见律师的。

“Well, I think that’s everything,” said Mulcaster. “You know, I’ve seen a

few divorces in my time, and I’ve never known one work out so happily for

all concerned. Almost always, however matey people are at the start, bad

blood crops up when they get down to detail. Mind you, I don’t mind saying

there have been times in the last two years when I thought you were treating

Celia a bit rough. It’s hard to tell with one’s own sister, but I’ve always

thought her a jolly attractive girl, the sort of girl any chap would be glad to

have—artistic, too, just down your street. But I must admit you’re a good

picker. I’ve always had a soft spot for Julia. Anyway, as things have turned

out everyone seems satisfied. Robin’s been mad about Celia for a year or

more. D’you know him?”

“嗯，我认为这就是一切，”Mulcaster说。“你知道，在我的时代，

我见过几起离婚，我从来没有听说过一个离婚对所有相关人员来说都

如此幸福。几乎总是，无论人们在开始时多么友善，当他们深入到细

节时，就会出现坏血。请注意，我不介意说在过去的两年里，我认为

你对西莉亚有点粗暴。很难和自己的妹妹说，但我一直认为她是一个

快乐迷人的女孩，任何小伙子都会很高兴拥有的那种女孩——艺术，

就在你的街上。但我必须承认你是一个很好的选择者。我一直对茱莉

亚情有独钟。无论如何，事实证明，每个人似乎都很满意。罗宾对西

莉亚的疯狂已经有一年或更长时间了。你认识他吗？

“Vaguely. A half-baked, pimply youth as I remember him.”

“隐隐约约。在我记忆中，他是一个半生不熟、长痘痘的青年。

“Oh, I wouldn’t quite say that. He’s rather young, of course, but the

great thing is that Johnjohn and Caroline adore him. You’ve got two grand

kids there, Charles. Remember me to Julia; wish her all the best for old

times’ sake.”

“哦，我不会这么说。当然，他很年轻，但最棒的是约翰和卡罗琳

崇拜他。你有两个孙子，查尔斯。记住我给朱莉娅;祝她一切顺利。

“So you’re being divorced,” said my father. “Isn’t that rather

unnecessary, after you’ve been happy together all these years?”

“所以你要离婚了，”我父亲说。“这难道不是没有必要吗，你们在

一起这么多年都很幸福吗？”

“We weren’t particularly happy, you know.”

“我们不是特别高兴，你知道的。”

“Weren’t you? Were you not? I distinctly remember last Christmas

seeing you together and thinking how happy you looked, and wondering

why. You’ll find it very disturbing, you know, starting off again. How old

are you—thirty-four? That’s no age to be starting. You ought to be settling

down. Have you made any plans?”

“不是吗？你不是吗？我清楚地记得去年圣诞节看到你们在一起，

想着你们看起来多么幸福，想知道为什么。你会发现它非常令人不

安，你知道，重新开始。你多大了——三十四岁？那不是开始的年

龄。你应该安顿下来。你有什么计划吗？

“Yes. I’m marrying again as soon as the divorce is through.”

“是的。离婚后，我就要再婚了。

“Well, I do call that a lot of nonsense. I can understand a man wishing

he hadn’t married and trying to get out of it—though I never felt anything

of the kind myself—but to get rid of one wife and take up with another

immediately, is beyond all reason. Celia was always perfectly civil to me. I

had quite a liking for her, in a way. If you couldn’t be happy with her, why

on earth should you expect to be happy with anyone else? Take my advice,

my dear boy, and give up the whole idea.”

“嗯，我确实说这是很多废话。我能理解一个男人希望他没有结婚

并试图摆脱它——尽管我自己从未有过这种感觉——但摆脱一个妻子

并立即与另一个妻子结婚，这完全是没有道理的。西莉亚对我总是很

有礼貌。在某种程度上，我很喜欢她。如果你不能和她在一起快乐，

你为什么要期望和别人一起快乐呢？接受我的建议，我亲爱的孩子，

放弃整个想法。

“Why bring Julia and me into this?” asked Rex. “If Celia wants to marry

again, well and good; let her. That’s your business and hers. But I should

have thought Julia and I were quite happy as we are. You can’t say I’ve

been difficult. Lots of chaps would have cut up nasty. I hope I’m a man of

the world. I’ve had my own fish to fry, too. But a divorce is a different thing

altogether; I’ve never known a divorce do anyone any good.”

“为什么要把茱莉亚和我带进来？”雷克斯问道。“如果西莉亚想再婚，

很好，很好;让她。那是你的事，也是她的事。但我应该认为茱莉亚和

我像现在这样很幸福。你不能说我很难。很多小伙子会切得很讨厌。

我希望我是一个世界的人。我也有自己的鱼要炸。但离婚完全是另一

回事;我从来不知道离婚对任何人都有好处。

“That’s your affair and Julia’s.”

“那是你和茱莉亚的事。”

“Oh, Julia’s set on it. What I hoped was, you might be able to talk her

round. I’ve tried to keep out of the way as much as I could; if I’ve been

around too much, just tell me; I shan’t mind. But there’s too much going on

altogether at the moment, what with Bridey wanting me to clear out of the

house; it’s disturbing, and I’ve got a lot on my mind.”

“哦，茱莉亚已经准备好了。我希望的是，你也许能和她谈谈。我

尽量不碍事;如果我待得太多了，就告诉我;我不介意。但是现在有太

多的事情发生了，布莱迪想让我离开家;这很令人不安，我有很多想

法。

Rex’s public life was approaching a climacteric. Things had not gone as

smoothly with him as he had planned. I knew nothing of finance, but I

heard it said that his dealings were badly looked on by orthodox

Conservatives; even his good qualities of geniality and impetuosity counted

against him, for his parties at Brideshead got talked about. There was

always too much about him in the papers; he was one with the Press lords

and their sad-eyed, smiling hangers-on; in his speeches he said the sort of

thing which ‘made a story’ in Fleet Street, and that did him no good with

his party chiefs; only war could put Rex’s fortunes right and carry him into

power. A divorce would do him no great harm; it was rather that with a big

bank running he could not look up from the table.

雷克斯的公共生活正在接近更年期。事情并没有像他计划的那样顺

利。我对金融一无所知，但我听说他的交易被正统的保守党人看得很

糟糕;就连他和蔼可亲和浮躁的优良品质也对他不利，因为他在布里德

斯黑德的派对被人们津津乐道。报纸上总是有太多关于他的事情;他与

报刊大佬和他们忧伤的眼神、微笑的衣架合而为一;在他的演讲中，他

说了那种在舰队街“制造故事”的话，这对他的党魁没有好处;只有战争

才能扭转雷克斯的命运，让他掌权。离婚不会对他有太大的伤害;相

反，由于一家大银行在运行，他无法从桌子上抬起头来。

“If Julia insists on a divorce, I suppose she must have it,” he said. “But

she couldn’t have chosen a worse time. Tell her to hang on a bit, Charles,

there’s a good fellow.”

“如果茱莉亚坚持离婚，我想她必须离婚，”他说。“但她不可能选

择更糟糕的时间。告诉她等一会儿，查尔斯，有个好人。

“Bridey’s widow said: ‘So you’re divorcing one divorced man and

marrying another. It sounds rather complicated, but my dear’—she called

me ‘my dear’ about twenty times—‘I’ve usually found every Catholic

family has one lapsed member, and it’s often the nicest.’ ”

“布莱迪的遗孀说：'所以你要和一个离婚的男人离婚，然后嫁给另一

个。这听起来相当复杂，但亲爱的“——她叫我”亲爱的“大约二十次

——”我通常发现每个天主教家庭都有一个已故的成员，而且往往是最

好的。"

Julia had just returned from a luncheon party given by Lady

Rosscommon in honor of Brideshead’s engagement.

茱莉亚刚从罗斯康芒夫人为纪念布里德斯黑德订婚而举办的午餐会

上回来。

“What’s she like?”

“她长什么样子？”

“Majestic and voluptuous; common, of course; husky voice, big mouth,

small eyes, dyed hair—I’ll tell you one thing, she’s lied to Bridey about her

age. She’s a good forty-five. I don’t see her providing an heir. Bridey can’t

take his eyes off her. He was gloating on her in the most revolting way all

through luncheon.”

“雄伟而妖娆;当然很常见;沙哑的嗓音，大嘴巴，小眼睛，染过的头

发——我告诉你一件事，她对布莱迪撒了谎。她已经四十五岁了。我

不认为她会提供继承人。Bridey无法将目光从她身上移开。在整个午

餐期间，他都以最令人反感的方式幸灾乐祸。

“Friendly?”

“友好吗？”

“Goodness, yes, in a condescending way. You see, I imagine she’s been

used to bossing things rather in naval circles, with flag-lieutenants trotting

round and young officers on-the-make sucking up to her. Well, she clearly

couldn’t do a great deal of bossing at Aunt Fanny’s, so it put her rather at

ease to have me there as the black sheep. She concentrated on me in fact,

asked my advice about shops and things, said, rather pointedly, she hoped to

see me often in London. I think Bridey’s scruples only extend to her

sleeping under the same roof with me. Apparently I can do her no serious

harm in a hat-shop or hairdresser’s or lunching at the Ritz. The scruples are

all on Bridey’s part, anyway; the widow is madly tough.”

“天哪，是的，以一种居高临下的方式。你看，我想她已经习惯了

在海军圈子里大发雷霆，旗手中尉小跑着走来走去，年轻的军官们对

她嗤之以鼻。好吧，她显然不能在范妮姨妈家做很多事情，所以让我

当害群之马让她很放心。事实上，她把注意力集中在我身上，问我关

于商店和事物的建议，相当尖锐地说，她希望经常在伦敦见到我。我

想布莱迪的顾忌只延伸到她和我睡在同一屋檐下。显然，我不会在帽

子店或理发店或在丽兹酒店吃午饭时对她造成严重伤害。无论如何，

顾忌都在布莱迪身上;寡妇非常强硬。

“Does she boss him?”

“她是他的老板吗？”

“Not yet, much. He’s in an amorous stupor, poor beast, and doesn’t quite

know where he is. She’s just a good-hearted woman who wants a good

home for her children and isn’t going to let anything get in her way. She’s

playing up the religious stuff at the moment for all it’s worth. I daresay

she’ll go easier when she’s settled.”

“还没有，很多。他处于多情的昏迷状态，可怜的野兽，不太清楚

自己在哪里。她只是一个心地善良的女人，她想给她的孩子一个好的

家，不会让任何事情妨碍她。她此刻正在玩弄宗教的东西，因为它是

值得的。我敢说，当她安顿下来时，她会走得更轻松。

The divorces were much talked of among our friends; even in that summer

of general alarm there were still corners where private affairs commanded

first attention. My wife was able to make it understood that the business

was at the same time a matter of congratulation for her and reproach for me;

that she had behaved wonderfully, had stood it longer than anyone but she

would have done. Robin was seven years younger and a little immature for

his age, they whispered in their private corners, but he was absolutely

devoted to poor Celia, and really she deserved it after all she had been

through. As for Julia and me, that was an old story. “To put it crudely,” said

my cousin Jasper, as though he had ever in his life put anything otherwise:

“I don’t see why you bother to marry.”

离婚在我们的朋友中经常被谈论;即使在那个普遍警戒的夏天，仍然有

一些角落是私人事务最先引起注意的。我的妻子能够理解，这项业务

既是对她的祝贺，也是对我的责备;她表现得非常出色，比任何人都忍

受得更久，但她会这样做的。罗宾比他小七岁，在他这个年纪有点稚

嫩，他们在私人角落里窃窃私语，但他对可怜的西莉亚绝对忠诚，在

她经历了这一切之后，她真的应得的。至于茱莉亚和我，那是个老故

事了。“说得粗略一点，”我的表弟贾斯珀说，好像他这辈子从来没有

说过别的话：“我不明白你为什么要结婚。

Summer passed; delirious crowds cheered Neville Chamberlain’s return

from Munich; Rex made a rabid speech in the House of Commons which

sealed his fate one way or the other; sealed it, as is sometimes done with

naval orders, to be opened later at sea. Julia’s family lawyers, whose black,

tin boxes, painted “Marquis of Marchmain,” seemed to fill a room, began

the slow process of her divorce; my own, brisker firm, two doors down,

were weeks ahead with my affairs. It was necessary for Rex and Julia to

separate formally, and since, for the time being, Brideshead was still her

home, she remained there and Rex removed his trunks and valet to their

house in London. Evidence was taken against Julia and me in my flat. A

date was fixed for Brideshead’s wedding, early in the Christmas holidays,

so that his future step-children might take part.

夏天过去了;神志不清的人群为内维尔·张伯伦从慕尼黑归来而欢呼;

雷克斯在下议院发表了一场狂热的演讲，以某种方式决定了他的命运;

密封它，就像有时在海军命令中所做的那样，稍后在海上打开。茱莉

亚的家庭律师，他们的黑色锡盒，上面画着“马奇曼侯爵”，似乎填满

了一个房间，开始了她离婚的缓慢过程;我自己的，更轻快的公司，两

扇门，提前几周处理我的事务。雷克斯和茱莉亚有必要正式分开，因

为目前布里德斯黑德仍然是她的家，她留在那里，雷克斯把他的行李

箱和男仆带到了他们在伦敦的家。在我的公寓里，对朱莉娅和我进行

了指控。布里德斯黑德的婚礼日期定在圣诞节假期的早期，以便他未

来的继子女可以参加。

One afternoon in November Julia and I stood at a window in the

drawing-room watching the wind at work stripping the lime trees, sweeping

down the yellow leaves, sweeping them up and round and along the terrace

and lawns, trailing them through puddles and over the wet grass, pasting

them on walls and window-panes, leaving them at length in sodden piles

against the stonework.

11月的一个下午，我和茱莉亚站在客厅的窗前，看着风吹拂着椴

树，扫下黄叶，沿着露台和草坪，拖着它们穿过水坑和湿草地，把它

们粘贴在墙壁和窗玻璃上，最后把它们堆成一堆湿漉漉的石雕。

“We shan’t see them in spring,” said Julia; “perhaps never again.”

“我们在春天看不到它们，”朱莉娅说;“也许再也不会了。”

“Once before,” I said, “I went away, thinking I should never return.”

“有一次，”我说，“我走了，以为我再也回不来了。

“Perhaps years later, to what’s left of it, with what’s left of us…”

“也许多年后，剩下的东西，我们剩下的东西......”

A door opened and shut in the darkling room behind us. Wilcox

approached through the firelight into the dusk about the long windows.

在我们身后黑暗的房间里，一扇门开了又关上了。威尔科克斯透过

火光走到黄昏的长窗周围。

“A telephone message, my Lady, from Lady Cordelia.”

“我的夫人，科迪莉亚夫人打来的电话。”

“Lady Cordelia! Where was she?”

“科黛莉亚夫人！她在哪里？

“In London, my Lady.”

“在伦敦，我的夫人。”

“Wilcox, how lovely! Is she coming home?”

“威尔科克斯，多么可爱！她要回家了吗？

“She was just starting for the station. She will be here after dinner.”

“她刚刚开始去车站。晚饭后她会来这里。

“I haven’t seen her for twelve years,” I said—not since the evening

when we dined together and she spoke of being a nun; the evening when I

painted the drawing-room at Marchmain House. “She was an enchanting

child.”

“我已经十二年没见到她了，”我说——自从那天晚上我们一起吃

饭，她说她是个修女之后，就没有见过她了。那天晚上，我粉刷了

Marchmain House的客厅。“她是个迷人的孩子。”

“She’s had an odd life. First, the convent; then, when that was no good,

the war in Spain. I’ve not seen her since then. The other girls who went

with the ambulance came back when the war was over; she stayed on,

getting people back to their homes, helping in the prison-camps. An odd

girl. She’s grown up quite plain, you know.”

“她过着奇怪的生活。首先，修道院;然后，当这不好的时候，西班

牙的战争。从那以后我就再也没有见过她。其他随救护车一起去的女

孩在战争结束后回来了;她留下来，把人们带回家，在监狱里帮忙。一

个奇怪的女孩。她从小就很朴素，你知道的。

“Does she know about us?”

“她知道我们吗？”

“Yes, she wrote me a sweet letter.”

“是的，她给我写了一封甜蜜的信。”

It hurt to think of Cordelia growing up “quite plain”; to think of all that

burning love spending itself on serum-injections and delousing powder.

When she arrived, tired from her journey, rather shabby, moving in the

manner of one who has no interest in pleasing, I thought her an ugly

woman. It was odd, I thought, how the same ingredients, differently

dispensed, could produce Brideshead, Sebastian, Julia, and her. She was

unmistakably their sister, without any of Julia’s or Sebastian’s grace,

without Brideshead’s gravity. She seemed brisk and matter-of-fact, steeped

in the atmosphere of camp and dressing-station, so accustomed to gross

suffering as to lose the finer shades of pleasure. She looked more than her

twenty-six years; hard living had roughened her; constant intercourse in a

foreign tongue had worn away the nuances of speech; she straddled a little

as she sat by the fire, and when she said, “It’s wonderful to be home,” it

sounded to my ears like the grunt of an animal returning to its basket.

想到科迪莉亚在“相当平淡”的成长过程中，我感到很痛苦;想想所有

燃烧的爱都花在精华液注射和除虱粉上。当她到达时，旅途疲惫不

堪，相当破旧，举止举止对取悦没有兴趣，我以为她是一个丑陋的女

人。奇怪的是，我想，同样的成分，不同的分配，怎么能产生布里德

斯黑德、塞巴斯蒂安、朱莉娅和她。她无疑是他们的妹妹，没有任何

茱莉亚或塞巴斯蒂安的优雅，没有布里德斯黑德的引力。她看起来很

轻快，很实事求是，沉浸在营地和更衣室的气氛中，已经习惯了严重

的痛苦，以至于失去了更美好的快乐。她看起来比她二十六岁多;艰苦

的生活使她变得艰难;不断用外语交往已经磨掉了言语的细微差别;当

她坐在火堆旁时，她跨在了一点上，当她说，“回家真好”时，这听起

来像是动物回到篮子里的咕噜声。

Those were the impressions of the first half hour, sharpened by the

contrast with Julia’s white skin and silk and jeweled hair and with my

memories of her as a child.

这些是前半个小时的印象，与茱莉亚白皙的皮肤、丝绸和宝石般的

头发以及我对她小时候的记忆形成鲜明对比。

“My job’s over in Spain,” she said; “the authorities were very polite,

thanked me for all I’d done, gave me a medal, and sent me packing. It looks

as though there’ll be plenty of the same sort of work over here soon.”

“我在西班牙的工作结束了，”她说;“当局非常有礼貌，感谢我所做

的一切，给了我一枚奖章，并给我打包行李。看起来这里很快就会有

很多类似的工作。

Then she said: “Is it too late to see nanny?”

然后她说：“现在看保姆是不是太晚了？

“No, she sits up to all hours with her wireless.”

“不，她整天都坐着无线。”

We went up, all three together, to the old nursery. Julia and I always

spent part of our day there. Nanny Hawkins and my father were two people

who seemed impervious to change, neither an hour older than when I first

knew them. A wireless set had now been added to Nanny Hawkins’ small

assembly of pleasures—the rosary, the Peerage with its neat brown-paper

wrapping protecting the red and gold covers, the photographs, and holiday

souvenirs—on her table. When we broke it to her that Julia and I were to be

married, she said: “Well, dear, I hope it’s all for the best,” for it was not part

of her religion to question the propriety of Julia’s actions.

我们三个人一起上去，去了老托儿所。茱莉亚和我总是在那里度过

一天的一部分。保姆霍金斯和我父亲是两个似乎无动于衷的人，他们

都比我第一次认识他们时大一个小时。现在，南妮·霍金斯（Nanny

Hawkins）的小型娱乐活动中增加了一套无线设备——念珠、带有整

齐的牛皮纸包装的贵族，保护着红色和金色的封面、照片和节日纪念

品——放在她的桌子上。当我们告诉她我和茱莉亚要结婚的消息时，

她说：“好吧，亲爱的，我希望一切都是最好的，”因为质疑茱莉亚行

为的适当性不是她的宗教信仰的一部分。

Brideshead had never been a favorite with her; she greeted the news of

his engagement with: “He’s certainly taken long enough to make up his

mind,” and, when the search through Debrett afforded no information about

Mrs. Muspratt’s connections: “She’s caught him, I daresay.”

布里德斯黑德从来都不是她的最爱;她向他订婚的消息打招呼：“他

肯定花了足够长的时间才下定决心，”当通过德布雷特的搜索没有提供

关于穆斯普拉特夫人关系的信息时：“她抓住了他，我敢说。

We found her, as always in the evening, at the fireside with her teapot,

and the wool rug she was making.

我们一如既往地在傍晚时分，在炉边找到她，手里拿着她的茶壶和

她正在做的羊毛地毯。

“I knew you’d be up,” she said. “Mr. Wilcox sent to tell me you were

coming.”

“我就知道你会起来的，”她说。“威尔科克斯先生派人来告诉我你

要来了。

“I brought you some lace.”

“我给你带了一些蕾丝。”

“Well, dear, that is nice. Just like her poor Ladyship used to wear at

mass. Though why they made it black I never did understand, seeing lace is

white naturally. That is very welcome, I’m sure.”

“嗯，亲爱的，那很好。就像她可怜的女主人过去在弥撒时穿的一

样。虽然他们为什么把它变成黑色，我从来不明白，看到蕾丝自然是

白色的。我敢肯定，这是非常受欢迎的。

“May I turn off the wireless, nanny?”

“我可以关掉无线吗，保姆？”

“Why, of course; I didn’t notice it was on, in the pleasure of seeing you.

What have you done to your hair?”

“为什么，当然;我没有注意到它打开了，很高兴见到你。你对你的

头发做了什么？

“I know it’s terrible. I must get all that put right now I’m back. Darling

nanny.”

“我知道这很可怕。我现在必须把所有的东西都放好，我回来了。

亲爱的保姆。

As we sat there talking, and I saw Cordelia’s fond eyes on all of us, I

began to realize that she, too, had a beauty of her own.

当我们坐在那里聊天时，我看到科迪莉亚深情地注视着我们所有

人，我开始意识到她也有自己的美丽。

“I saw Sebastian last month.”

“我上个月见过塞巴斯蒂安。”

“What a time he’s been gone! Was he quite well?”

“他走了多好久啊！他身体还好吗？

“Not very. That’s why I went. It’s quite near you know from Spain to

Tunis. He’s with the monks there.”

“不是很。这就是我去的原因。从西班牙到突尼斯，它离您很近。

他和那里的僧侣在一起。

“I hope they look after him properly. I expect they find him a regular

handful. He always sends to me at Christmas, but it’s not the same as

having him home. Why you must all always be going abroad I never did

understand. Just like his Lordship. When there was that talk about going to

war with Munich, I said to myself, ‘There’s Cordelia and Sebastian and his

Lordship all abroad; that’ll be very awkward for them.’ ”

“我希望他们好好照顾他。我希望他们能找到他一个普通的少数

人。他总是在圣诞节寄信给我，但这和让他回家是不一样的。为什么

你们一定要出国，我从来不明白。就像他的领主一样。当有人谈论与

慕尼黑开战时，我对自己说，'科迪莉亚和塞巴斯蒂安和他的领主都在

国外;这对他们来说会非常尴尬。"

“I wanted him to come home with me, but he wouldn’t. He’s got a beard

now, you know, and he’s very religious.”

“我希望他和我一起回家，但他不愿意。他现在留着胡子，你知道

的，他非常虔诚。

“That I won’t believe, not even if I see it. He was always a little heathen.

Brideshead was one for church, not Sebastian. And a beard, only fancy;

such a nice fair skin as he had; always looked clean though he’d not been

near water all day, while Brideshead there was no doing anything with,

scrub as you might.”

“我不会相信，即使我看到它也不会。他总是有点异教徒。

Brideshead是教堂的人，而不是塞巴斯蒂安。还有胡子，只是花哨的;

像他这样漂亮的白皙皮肤;虽然他一整天都没靠近水，但总是看起来很

干净，而Brideshead则没有做任何事情，随便擦洗。

“It’s frightening,” Julia once said, “to think how completely you have

forgotten Sebastian.”

“这太可怕了，”朱莉娅曾经说过，“想想你已经完全忘记了塞巴斯蒂

安。

“He was the forerunner.”

“他是先行者。”

“That’s what you said in the storm. I’ve thought since, perhaps I am only

a forerunner, too.”

“这就是你在暴风雨中所说的。从那以后我就想，也许我也只是一

个先行者。

“Perhaps,” I thought, while her words still hung in the air between us

like a wisp of tobacco smoke—a thought to fade and vanish like smoke

without a trace—“perhaps all our loves are merely hints and symbols;

vagabond-language scrawled on gate-posts and paving-stones along the

weary road that others have tramped before us; perhaps you and I are types

and this sadness which sometimes falls between us springs from

disappointment in our search, each straining through and beyond the other,

snatching a glimpse now and then of the shadow which turns the corner

always a pace or two ahead of us.”

“也许，”我想，虽然她的话仍然像一缕烟草烟雾一样悬在我们之间

的空气中——一个像烟雾一样消失和消失的想法——“也许我们所有的

爱都只是暗示和象征;流浪者的语言潦草地写在门柱和铺路石上，沿着

别人在我们之前踩过的疲惫的道路;也许你和我都是类型，这种有时落

在我们之间的悲伤源于我们在寻找过程中的失望，每个人都在努力地

超越对方，时不时地瞥见那个总是在我们前面一两步转弯的影子。

I had not forgotten Sebastian. He was with me daily in Julia; or rather it

was Julia I had known in him, in those distant Arcadian days.

我没有忘记塞巴斯蒂安。他每天都在茱莉亚和我在一起;或者更确

切地说，是我在那些遥远的阿卡迪亚时代在他身上认识的朱莉娅。

“That’s cold comfort for a girl,” she said when I tried to explain. “How

do I know I shan’t suddenly turn out to be somebody else? It’s an easy way

to chuck.”

“这对一个女孩来说是一种冰冷的安慰，”当我试图解释时，她说。

“我怎么知道我不会突然变成别人？这是一种简单的夹头方法。

I had not forgotten Sebastian; every stone of the house had a memory of

him, and hearing him spoken of by Cordelia as someone she had seen a

month ago, my lost friend filled my thoughts. When we left the nursery, I

said, “I want to hear all about Sebastian.”

我没有忘记塞巴斯蒂安;房子里的每一块石头都对他有记忆，听到

科迪莉亚说他一个月前见过的人，我失去的朋友充满了我的思绪。当

我们离开托儿所时，我说：“我想听听关于塞巴斯蒂安的一切。

“Tomorrow. It’s a long story.”

“明天。说来话长。

And next day, walking through the wind-swept park, she told me:

第二天，她走过被风吹拂的公园，对我说：

“I heard he was dying,” she said. “A journalist in Burgos told me, who’d

just arrived from North Africa. A down-and-out called Flyte, who people

said was an English lord, whom the fathers had found starving and taken in

at a monastery near Carthage. That was how the story reached me. I knew it

couldn’t be quite true—however little we did for Sebastian, he at least got

his money sent him—but I started off at once.

“我听说他快死了，”她说。“布尔戈斯的一位记者告诉我，他刚从

北非赶来。一个名叫弗莱特的落魄者，人们说他是一位英国领主，父

亲们发现他挨饿，并收留了迦太基附近的一座修道院。这个故事就是

这样传到我的。我知道这不可能是真的——无论我们为塞巴斯蒂安做

了什么，他至少把钱寄给了他——但我马上就开始了。

“It was all quite easy. I went to the consulate first and they knew all

about him; he was in the infirmary of the head house of some missionary

fathers. The consul’s story was that Sebastian had turned up in Tunis one

day in a motor bus from Algiers, and had applied to be taken on as a

missionary lay-brother. The Fathers took one look at him and turned him

down. Then he started drinking. He lived in a little hotel on the edge of the

Arab quarter. I went to see the place later; it was a bar with a few rooms

over it, kept by a Greek, smelling of hot oil and garlic and stale wine and

old clothes, a place where the small Greek traders came and played

draughts and listened to the wireless. He stayed there a month drinking

Greek absinthe, occasionally wandering out, they didn’t know where,

coming back and drinking again. They were afraid he would come to harm

and followed him sometimes, but he only went to the church or took a car

to the monastery outside the town. They loved him there. He’s still loved,

you see, wherever he goes, whatever condition he’s in. It’s a thing about

him he’ll never lose. You should have heard the proprietor and his family

talk of him, tears running down their cheeks; they’d clearly robbed him

right and left, but they’d looked after him and tried to make him eat his

food. That was the thing that shocked them about him; that he wouldn’t eat;

there he was with all that money, so thin. Some of the clients of the place

came in while we were talking in very peculiar French; they all had the

same story; such a good man, they said, it made them unhappy to see him

so low. They thought very ill of his family for leaving him like that; it

couldn’t happen with their people, they said, and I daresay they’re right.

“一切都很容易。我先去了领事馆，他们知道他的一切;他在一些传

教士神父的总部医务室里。领事的故事是，塞巴斯蒂安有一天从阿尔

及尔乘坐一辆汽车来到突尼斯，并申请成为传教士平信徒。神父们看

了他一眼，拒绝了他。然后他开始喝酒。他住在阿拉伯区边缘的一家

小旅馆里。后来我去看了那个地方;那是一个酒吧，上面有几个房间，

由一个希腊人打理，闻起来有热油、大蒜、陈酒和旧衣服的味道，希

腊小商人来这里打草稿，听无线广播。他在那里呆了一个月，喝着希

腊苦艾酒，偶尔出去逛逛，他们不知道在哪里，回来又喝酒。他们害

怕他会来伤害他，有时跟着他，但他只去教堂或乘车去城外的修道

院。他们在那里爱他。你看，无论他走到哪里，无论他处于什么状

态，他仍然被爱着。这是他永远不会失去的东西。你应该听到店主和

他的家人谈论他，泪水顺着他们的脸颊流下来;他们明明是左右抢劫了

他，但他们照顾他，试图让他吃掉他的食物。这就是让他们对他感到

震惊的事情;他不吃;他在那里拿着那么多钱，太瘦了。当我们用非常

奇特的法语交谈时，这个地方的一些客户进来了;他们都有同样的故

事;他们说，这么好的人，看到他这么卑微，他们很不高兴。他们认为

他的家人就这样离开了他，非常不高兴;他们说，这不可能发生在他们

的人民身上，我敢说他们是对的。

“Anyway, that was later; after the consulate I went straight to the

monastery and saw the Superior. He was a grim old Dutchman who had

spent fifty years in Central Africa. He told me his part of the story; how

Sebastian had turned up, just as the consul said, with his beard and a

suitcase, and asked to be admitted as a lay brother. ‘He was very earnest,’

the Superior said”—Cordelia imitated his guttural tones; she had an

aptitude for mimicry, I remembered, in the school-room—“ ‘Please do not

think there is any doubt of that—he is quite sane and quite in earnest.’ He

wanted to go to the bush, as far away as he could get, among the simplest

people, to the cannibals. The Superior said: ‘We have no cannibals in our

missions.’ He said, well, pygmies would do, or just a primitive village

somewhere on a river, or lepers, lepers would do best of anything. The

Superior said: ‘We have plenty of lepers, but they live in our settlements

with doctors and nuns. It is all very orderly.’ He thought again, and said

perhaps lepers were not what he wanted, was there not some small church

by a river—he always wanted a river you see—which he could look after

when the priest was away. The Superior said: ‘Yes, there are such churches.

Now tell me about yourself.’ ‘Oh, I’m nothing,’ he said. ‘We see some

queer fish,’ ” Cordelia lapsed again into mimicry; “ ‘he was a queer fish but

he was very earnest.’ The Superior told him about the novitiate and the

training and said: ‘You are not a young man. You do not seem strong to

me.’ He said: ‘No, I don’t want to be trained. I don’t want to do things that

need training.’ The Superior said: ‘My friend, you need a missionary for

yourself,’ and he said: ‘Yes, of course.’ Then he sent him away.

“不管怎么说，那是后来的事了;在领事馆之后，我直奔修道院，见

到了上级。他是一个冷酷的荷兰老人，在中非生活了五十年。他向我

讲述了他的故事;正如领事所说，塞巴斯蒂安是如何留着胡子和手提箱

出现的，并要求被接纳为平信徒兄弟。“他非常认真，”上司说“——科

迪莉亚模仿他的喉音;我记得，在教室里，她有模仿的天赋——“”请不

要以为这有什么疑问——他很理智，也很认真。他想去灌木丛，尽可

能远的地方，在最简单的人中，去食人族。上级说：“我们的任务中没

有食人族。他说，好吧，俾格米人会做，或者只是河边某个地方的原

始村庄，或者麻风病人，麻风病人会做任何事情。上司说：“我们有很

多麻风病人，但他们和医生和修女一起住在我们的定居点。一切都井

然有序。他又想了想，说也许麻风病人不是他想要的，难道不是有一

座河边的小教堂吗——他总是想要一条河——当牧师不在的时候，他

可以照看它。上司说：'是的，有这样的教会。现在告诉我你自己。

“哦，我什么都不是，”他说。“我们看到一些奇怪的鱼，”科迪莉亚又

陷入了模仿;“他是个古怪的鱼，但他非常认真。上司告诉他关于新生

和训练的事情，并说：“你不是一个年轻人。在我看来，你并不坚强。

他说：'不，我不想接受训练。我不想做需要训练的事情。上司说：'我

的朋友，你自己需要一个传教士，'他说：'是的，当然。然后他把他打

发走了。

“Next day he came back again. He had been drinking. He said he had

decided to become a novice and be trained. ‘Well,’ said the Superior, ‘there

are certain things that are impossible for a man in the bush. One of them is

drinking. It is not the worst thing, but it is nevertheless quite fatal. I sent

him away.’ Then he kept coming two or three times a week, always drunk,

until the Superior gave orders that the porter was to keep him out. I said,

‘Oh dear, I’m afraid he was a terrible nuisance to you,’ but of course that’s a

thing they don’t understand in a place like that. The Superior simply said, ‘I

did not think there was anything I could do to help him except pray.’ He

was a very holy old man and recognized it in others.”

“第二天他又回来了。他一直在喝酒。他说他已经决定成为一名新

手并接受培训。“嗯，”上司说，“有些事情对于一个在丛林中的人来说

是不可能的。其中之一是喝酒。这不是最糟糕的事情，但它仍然是相

当致命的。我把他打发走了。然后他每周来两三次，总是喝得酩酊大

醉，直到上司下令门房把他拒之门外。我说，'哦，亲爱的，恐怕他对

你来说是个可怕的麻烦，'但当然，在这样的地方，这是他们不理解的

事情。上司只是说：“我认为除了祈祷，我无能为力。他是一个非常圣

洁的老人，在别人身上也认识到了这一点。

“Holiness?”

“圣洁？”

“Oh yes, Charles, that’s what you’ve got to understand about Sebastian.

“哦，是的，查尔斯，这就是你必须了解塞巴斯蒂安的事情。

“Well, finally one day they found Sebastian lying outside the main gate

unconscious, he had walked out—usually he took a car—and fallen down

and lain there all night. At first they thought he was merely drunk again;

then they realized he was very ill, so they put him in the infirmary, where

he’d been ever since.

“好吧，终于有一天，他们发现塞巴斯蒂安躺在大门外昏迷不醒，

他走了出去——通常他坐了一辆车——然后摔倒了，在那里躺了一整

夜。起初，他们以为他只是又喝醉了;然后他们意识到他病得很重，所

以他们把他送进了医务室，从那以后他就一直在那里。

“I stayed a fortnight with him till he was over the worst of his illness. He

looked terrible, any age, rather bald with a straggling beard, but he had his

old sweet manner. They’d given him a room to himself; it was barely more

than a monk’s cell with a bed and a crucifix and white walls. At first he

couldn’t talk much and was not at all surprised to see me; then he was

surprised and wouldn’t talk much, until just before I was going, when he

told me all that had been happening to him. It was mostly about Kurt, his

German friend. Well, you met him, so you know all about that. He sounds

gruesome, but as long as Sebastian had him to look after, he was happy. He

told me he’d practically given up drinking at one time while he and Kurt

lived together. Kurt was ill and had a wound that wouldn’t heal. Sebastian

saw him through that. Then they went to Greece when Kurt got well. You

know how Germans sometimes seem to discover a sense of decency when

they get to a classical country. It seems to have worked with Kurt. Sebastian

says he became quite human in Athens. Then he got sent to prison; I

couldn’t quite make out why; apparently it wasn’t particularly his fault—

some brawl with an official. Once he was locked up the German authorities

got at him. It was the time when they were rounding up all their nationals

from all parts of the world to make them into Nazis. Kurt didn’t want to

leave Greece, but the Greeks didn’t want him, and he was marched straight

from prison with a lot of other toughs into a German boat and shipped

home.

“我和他呆了两个星期，直到他病情最严重的时候。他看起来很可

怕，任何年龄，秃顶，胡子乱糟糟的，但他有他以前甜美的举止。他

们给了他一个属于自己的房间;它只不过是一个僧侣的牢房，里面有一

张床、一个十字架和白色的墙壁。起初，他话不多，见到我一点也不

惊讶;然后他很惊讶，不愿多说话，直到我走之前，他告诉我发生在他

身上的一切。这主要是关于他的德国朋友库尔特的。好吧，你见过

他，所以你知道这一切。他听起来很可怕，但只要塞巴斯蒂安有他照

顾，他就很高兴。他告诉我，当他和库尔特住在一起时，他几乎一度

戒酒。库尔特病了，伤口无法愈合。塞巴斯蒂安（Sebastian）见证了

他。然后，当库尔特康复时，他们去了希腊。你知道德国人有时在到

达一个古典国家时似乎会发现一种体面感。它似乎与库尔特一起工

作。塞巴斯蒂安说，他在雅典变得非常人性化。然后他被送进了监狱;

我不太明白为什么;显然，这并不是他的错——与一名官员发生了一些

争吵。一旦他被关起来，德国当局就对他动手了。那是他们从世界各

地围捕所有国民以使他们成为纳粹分子的时候。库尔特不想离开希

腊，但希腊人也不想要他，于是他和许多其他强硬的人一起被直接从

监狱押上一艘德国船，然后运回家。

“Sebastian went after him, and for a year could find no trace. Then in

the end he ran him to earth dressed as a storm-trooper in a provincial town.

At first he wouldn’t have anything to do with Sebastian; spouted all the

official jargon about the rebirth of his country, and his belonging to his

country, and finding self-realization in the life of the race. But it was only

skin deep with him. Six years of Sebastian had taught him more than a year

of Hitler; eventually he chucked it, admitted he hated Germany, and wanted

to get out. I don’t know how much it was simply the call of the easy life,

sponging on Sebastian, bathing in the Mediterranean, sitting about in cafés,

having his shoes polished. Sebastian says it wasn’t entirely that; Kurt had

just begun to grow up in Athens. It may be he’s right. Anyway, he decided

to try and get out. But it didn’t work. He always got into trouble whatever

he did, Sebastian said. They caught him and put him in a concentration

camp. Sebastian couldn’t get near him or hear a word of him; he couldn’t

even find what camp he was in; he hung about for nearly a year in

Germany, drinking again, until one day in his cups he took up with a man

who was just out of the camp where Kurt had been, and learned that he had

hanged himself in his hut the first week.

“塞巴斯蒂安追赶他，一年来找不到踪迹。最后，他把他打扮成一

个省城的冲锋队员，把他带到了地上。起初，他与塞巴斯蒂安没有任

何关系;滔滔不绝地滔滔不绝地谈论着他的国家的重生，以及他对自己

国家的归属感，并在种族的生活中找到了自我实现。但对他来说，这

只是皮肤深处。塞巴斯蒂安的六年教会了他一年多的希特勒;最终，他

放弃了它，承认他讨厌德国，并想离开。我不知道这多少只是轻松生

活的呼唤，在塞巴斯蒂安身上晒海绵，在地中海沐浴，坐在咖啡馆

里，擦鞋。塞巴斯蒂安说，情况并非完全如此。库尔特刚刚开始在雅

典长大。也许他是对的。无论如何，他决定尝试离开。但它没有用。

塞巴斯蒂安说，无论他做什么，他总是惹上麻烦。他们抓住了他，把

他关进了集中营。塞巴斯蒂安无法靠近他，也听不到他的一句话;他甚

至找不到自己在哪个营地;他在德国徘徊了将近一年，再次喝酒，直到

有一天，他喝着酒，和一个刚从库尔特去过的集中营出来的人在一

起，得知他第一周在小屋里上吊自杀了。

“So that was the end of Europe for Sebastian. He went back to Morocco,

where he had been happy, and gradually drifted down the coast, from place

to place, until one day when he had sobered up—his drinking goes in pretty

regular bouts now—he conceived the idea of escaping to the savages. And

there he was.

“所以对于塞巴斯蒂安来说，这就是欧洲的终结。他回到了摩洛

哥，在那里他一直很快乐，并逐渐沿着海岸漂流，从一个地方漂到另

一个地方，直到有一天他清醒过来——他现在经常喝酒——他萌生了

逃到野蛮人那里的想法。他就在那里。

“I didn’t suggest his coming home. I knew he wouldn’t, and he was too

weak still to argue it out. He seemed quite happy by the time I left. He’ll

never be able to go into the bush, of course, or join the order, but the Father

Superior is going to take charge of him. They had the idea of making him a

sort of under-porter; there are usually a few odd hangers-on in a religious

house, you know; people who can’t quite fit in either to the world or the

monastic rule. I suppose I’m something of the sort myself. But as I don’t

happen to drink, I’m more employable.”

“我没有建议他回家。我知道他不会，而且他还太虚弱了，无法反

驳。我离开的时候，他看起来很开心。当然，他永远无法进入灌木

丛，也无法加入骑士团，但上级神父将负责他。他们想把他变成一个

搬运工;你知道，在宗教房子里通常有一些奇怪的衣架;既不能完全适

应世界，也不能完全适应修道院规则的人。我想我自己就是这样的

人。但是由于我不喝酒，所以我更容易就业。

We had reached the turn in our walk, the stone bridge at the foot of the

last and smallest lake, under which the swollen waters fell in a cataract to

the stream below; beyond, the path doubled back towards the house. We

paused at the parapet looking down into the dark water.

我们走到了转弯处，在最后一个也是最小的湖脚下的石桥上，膨胀

的水在桥下白内障地落入下面的溪流;再往前走，小路又回到了房子。

我们在栏杆前停了下来，俯视着黑暗的水面。

“I once had a governess who jumped off this bridge and drowned

herself.”

“我曾经有一个家庭教师从这座桥上跳下来淹死了自己。

“Yes, I know.”

“是的，我知道。”

“How could you know?”

“你怎么知道？”

“It was the first thing I ever heard about you—before I ever met you.”

“这是我第一次听说你——在我遇见你之前。”

“How very odd…”

“真奇怪......”

“Have you told Julia this about Sebastian?”

“你把塞巴斯蒂安的事告诉茱莉亚了吗？”

“The substance of it; not quite as I told you. She never loved him, you

know, as we do.”

“它的实质;不像我告诉你的那样。她从来没有爱过他，你知道的，

就像我们一样。

“Do.” The word reproached me; there was no past tense in Cordelia’s

verb “to love.”

“做。”这话责备了我;科迪莉亚的动词“爱”中没有过去时。

“Poor Sebastian!” I said. “It’s too pitiful. How will it end?”

“可怜的塞巴斯蒂安！”我说过。“太可怜了。它将如何结束？

“I think I can tell you exactly, Charles. I’ve seen others like him, and I

believe they are very near and dear to God. He’ll live on, half in, half out

of, the community, a familiar figure pottering round with his broom and his

bunch of keys. He’ll be a great favorite with the old fathers, something of a

joke to the novices. Everyone will know about his drinking; he’ll disappear

for two or three days every month or so, and they’ll all nod and smile and

say in their various accents, “Old Sebastian’s on the spree again,” and then

he’ll come back disheveled and shamefaced and be more devout for a day

or two in the chapel. He’ll probably have little hiding places about the

garden where he keeps a bottle and takes a swig now and then on the sly.

They’ll bring him forward to act as guide, whenever they have an English-

speaking visitor, and he will be completely charming so that before they go,

they’ll ask about him and perhaps be given a hint that he has high

connections at home. If he lives long enough, generations of missionaries in

all kinds of remote places will think of him as a queer old character who

was somehow part of the Hope of their student days, and remember him in

their masses. He’ll develop little eccentricities of devotion, intense personal

cults of his own; he’ll be found in the chapel at odd times and missed when

he’s expected. Then one morning, after one of his drinking bouts, he’ll be

picked up at the gate dying, and show by a mere flicker of the eyelid that he

is conscious when they give him the last sacraments. It’s not such a bad way

of getting through one’s life.”

“我想我可以准确地告诉你，查尔斯。我见过像他这样的人，我相

信他们与上帝非常亲近和亲近。他会继续生活，一半在社区里，一半

在社区外，一个熟悉的身影拿着他的扫帚和一串钥匙四处走动。他会

成为老父亲的最爱，对新手来说是个笑话。每个人都会知道他喝酒;他

每个月都会消失两三天左右，他们都会点头微笑，用不同的口音说，

“老塞巴斯蒂安又来狂欢了”，然后他会衣衫褴褛地回来，在教堂里呆

上一两天。他可能在花园里几乎没有藏身之处，在那里他放着一个瓶

子，时不时地偷偷地喝一口。每当他们有说英语的访客时，他们就会

把他带到前面担任向导，他会非常迷人，所以在他们走之前，他们会

询问他的情况，也许会得到一个暗示，表明他在家里有很高的人脉。

如果他活得足够长，那么在各种偏远地区，一代又一代的传教士会认

为他是一个古怪的老人物，在某种程度上是他们学生时代希望的一部

分，并在他们的群众中记住他。他会发展出虔诚的小怪癖，强烈的个

人崇拜;他会在奇怪的时间出现在教堂里，并在他预计的时候错过。然

后有一天早上，在他喝完酒后，他会在门口被接走，奄奄一息，当他

们给他最后的圣礼时，他只是一个眼睑的闪烁就表明他是有意识的。

这并不是一种糟糕的度过人生的方式。

I thought of the youth with the teddy-bear under the flowering chestnuts.

“It’s not what one would have foretold,” I said. “I suppose he doesn’t

suffer?”

我想起了那个在开花的栗子下抱着泰迪熊的年轻人。“这不是人们

所预言的，”我说。“我想他不会受苦吧？”

“Oh, yes, I think he does. One can have no idea what the suffering may

be, to be maimed as he is—no dignity, no power of will. No one is ever

holy without suffering. It’s taken that form with him…. I’ve seen so much

suffering in the last few years; there’s so much coming for everybody soon.

It’s the spring of love…” and then in condescension to my paganism, she

added: “He’s in a very beautiful place, you know, by the sea—white

cloisters, a bell tower, rows of green vegetables, and a monk watering them

when the sun is low.”

“哦，是的，我想他知道。一个人不可能知道像他这样残废的痛苦

是什么——没有尊严，没有意志力。没有人没有苦难就永远是圣洁

的。他就是这样......在过去的几年里，我看到了太多的苦难;每个人都

很快会有这么多事情要做。这是爱的春天......”然后，她居高临下地对

我的异教徒说：“他在一个非常美丽的地方，你知道，在海边——白色

的回廊，一座钟楼，一排排绿色的蔬菜，还有一个僧侣在太阳落山时

给它们浇水。

I laughed. “You knew I wouldn’t understand?”

我笑了。“你知道我不会明白吗？”

“You and Julia…” she said. And then, as we moved on towards the

house, “When you met me last night did you think, ‘Poor Cordelia, such an

engaging child, grown up a plain and pious spinster, full of good works’?

Did you think ‘thwarted’?”

“你和茱莉亚......”她说。然后，当我们继续向房子走去时，“当你昨

晚见到我时，你有没有想过，'可怜的科迪莉亚，一个如此迷人的孩

子，长大后是一个朴素而虔诚的纺纱机，充满了善行'？你以为'受

挫'了吗？

It was no time for prevarication. “Yes,” I said, “I did; I don’t now, so

much.”

现在不是推诿搪塞的时候。“是的，”我说，“我做到了;我现在没

有，那么多。

“It’s funny,” she said, “that’s exactly the word I thought of for you and

Julia. When we were up in the nursery with nanny. ‘Thwarted passion,’ I

thought.”

“这很有趣，”她说，“这正是我想到的你和茱莉亚的词。当我们和

保姆一起在托儿所时。“挫败了激情，”我想。

She spoke with that gentle, infinitesimal inflexion of mockery which

descended to her from her mother, but later that evening the words came

back to me poignantly.

她说话时带着那种温柔的、微不足道的嘲弄，这种嘲弄是从她母亲

那里传来的，但那天晚上晚些时候，这些话又尖锐地回到了我的脑海

中。

Julia wore the embroidered Chinese robe which she often used when we

were dining alone at Brideshead; it was a robe whose weight and stiff folds

stressed her repose; her neck rose exquisitely from the plain gold circle at

her throat; her hands lay still among the dragons in her lap. It was thus that I

had rejoiced to see her nights without number, and that night, watching her

as she sat between the firelight and the shaded lamp, unable to look away

for love of her beauty, I suddenly thought, “When else have I seen her like

this? Why am I reminded of another moment of vision?” And it came back

to me that this was how she had sat in the liner, before the storm; this was

how she had looked, and I realized that she had regained what I thought she

had lost forever, the magical sadness which had drawn me to her, the

thwarted look that had seemed to say, “Surely I was made for some other

purpose than this?”

茱莉亚穿着绣花的中国长袍，当我们独自在布里德斯黑德用餐时，

她经常使用;那是一件长袍，它的重量和僵硬的褶皱使她感到疲惫;她

的脖子从喉咙处的纯金圆圈中精致地隆起;她的双手静静地放在膝盖上

的龙之间。就这样，我为无数个夜晚看到她而欢欣鼓舞，那天晚上，

看着她坐在火光和昏暗的灯之间，无法移开视线，因为她的美丽，我

突然想：“我什么时候见过这样的她？为什么我又想起了另一个异象的

时刻？我回想起来，这就是暴风雨来临前她坐在班轮上的样子;这就是

她的样子，我意识到她已经找回了我以为她永远失去的东西，那种把

我吸引到她身边的神奇的悲伤，那种似乎在说：“我肯定是为了其他目

的而生的吗？

That night I woke in the darkness and lay awake turning over in my

mind the conversation with Cordelia. How I had said, “You knew I would

not understand.” How often, it seemed to me, I was brought up short, like a

horse in full stride suddenly refusing an obstacle, backing against the spurs,

too shy even to put his nose at it and look at the thing.

那天晚上，我在黑暗中醒来，躺在床上，脑海里翻着与科迪莉亚的

谈话。我怎么说，“你知道我不会明白。在我看来，有多少次，我被拉

得矮了，就像一匹全速前进的马突然拒绝了障碍，背靠着马刺，甚至

害羞得不敢把鼻子放在它身上看东西。

And another image came to me, of an arctic hut and a trapper alone with

his furs and oil lamp and log fire; everything dry and ship-shape and warm

inside, and outside the last blizzard of winter raging and the snow piling up

against the door. Quite silently a great weight forming against the timber;

the bolt straining in its socket; minute by minute in the darkness outside the

white heap sealing the door, until quite soon when the wind dropped and the

sun came out on the ice slopes and the thaw set in a block would move,

slide, and tumble, high above, gather weight, till the whole hillside seemed

to be falling, and the little lighted place would open and splinter and

disappear, rolling with the avalanche into the ravine.

我脑海中浮现出另一幅画面，一个北极小屋和一个捕猎者独自一

人，带着他的毛皮、油灯和柴火;一切都干燥，船形，里面温暖，外面

冬天的最后一场暴风雪肆虐，雪堆积在门上。一个巨大的重量无声无

息地压在木材上;螺栓在其套筒中拉紧;在白色的堆积门外的黑暗中，

一分钟一分钟地过去了，直到很快，风停了，太阳从冰坡上出来了，

解冻的冰块会移动，滑动，翻滚，高高在上，积聚重量，直到整个山

坡似乎都在倒塌，那个小小的灯火通明的地方会打开，碎裂，消失，

随着雪崩滚入峡谷。

Five

五

My divorce case, or rather my wife’s, was due to be heard at about the

same time as Brideshead was to be married. Julia’s would not come up till

the following term; meanwhile the game of General Post—moving my

property from the Old Rectory to my flat, my wife’s from my flat to the Old

Rectory, Julia’s from Rex’s house and from Brideshead to my flat, Rex’s

from Brideshead to his house, and Mrs. Muspratt’s from Falmouth to

Brideshead—was in full swing and we were all, in varying degrees,

homeless, when a halt was called and Lord Marchmain, with a taste for the

dramatically inopportune which was plainly the prototype of his elder son’s,

declared his intention, in view of the international situation, of returning to

England and passing his declining years in his old home.

我的离婚案，或者更确切地说是我妻子的离婚案，大约在布莱德黑德

结婚的同时开庭审理。茱莉亚要到下个学期才会出现;与此同时，邮政

将军的游戏——把我的财产从旧教区搬到我的公寓，我妻子的财产从

我的公寓搬到老教区，朱莉娅的财产从雷克斯的房子和布里德斯黑德

搬到我的公寓，雷克斯的房子从布里德斯黑德搬到他的房子，穆斯普

拉特太太的财产从法尔茅斯搬到布里德斯黑德——正在如火如荼地进

行，我们都是，在不同程度上，无家可归，当被叫停时，马奇曼勋爵

尝到了戏剧性的不合时宜的滋味，这显然是他大儿子的原型，鉴于国

际形势，他宣布他打算回到英国，在他的老家度过他衰落的岁月。

The only member of the family to whom this change promised any

benefit was Cordelia, who had been sadly abandoned in the turmoil.

Brideshead, indeed, had made a formal request to her to consider his house

her home for as long as it suited her, but when she learned that her sister-in-

law proposed to install her children there for the holidays immediately after

the wedding, in the charge of a sister of hers and the sister’s friend, Cordelia

had decided to move, too, and was talking of setting up alone in London.

She now found herself, Cinderella-like, promoted châtelaine, while her

brother and his wife who had till that moment expected to find themselves,

within a matter of days, in absolute command, were without a roof; the

deeds of conveyance, engrossed and ready for signing, were rolled up, tied,

and put away in one of the black tin boxes in Lincoln’s Inn. It was bitter for

Mrs. Muspratt; she was not an ambitious woman; something very much less

grand than Brideshead would have contented her heartily, but she did aspire

to find some shelter for her children over Christmas. The house at Falmouth

was stripped and up for sale; moreover, Mrs. Muspratt had taken leave of

the place with some justifiably rather large talk of her new establishment;

they could not return there. She was obliged in a hurry to move her

furniture from Lady Marchmain’s room to a disused coach-house and to

take a furnished villa at Torquay. She was not, as I have said, a woman of

high ambition, but, having had her expectations so much raised, it was

disconcerting to be brought so low so suddenly. In the village the working

party who had been preparing the decorations for the bridal entry, began

unpicking the Bs on the bunting and substituting Ms, obliterating the Earl’s

points and stenciling balls and strawberry leaves on the painted coronets, in

preparation for Lord Marchmain’s return.

这个家庭中唯一一个对这一变化有任何好处的成员是科迪莉亚，她

在动荡中不幸被遗弃了。事实上，新娘头已经向她提出了正式的要

求，只要适合她，就把他的房子当作她的家，但当她得知她的嫂子提

议在婚礼后立即将她的孩子安置在那里过节时，由她的一个姐姐和姐

姐的朋友负责，科迪莉亚决定搬家，也是，并且正在谈论在伦敦独自

设立。她现在发现自己像灰姑娘一样，晋升了城堡，而她的兄弟和他

的妻子，直到那一刻，他们才期望在几天之内发现自己处于绝对的指

挥地位，却没有屋顶;全神贯注并准备签署的转让契约被卷起来，绑起

来，放在林肯旅馆的一个黑色锡盒里。这对穆斯普拉特太太来说是痛

苦的;她不是一个雄心勃勃的女人;比布里德斯黑德（Brideshead）大得

多的东西会让她由衷地满足，但她确实渴望在圣诞节期间为她的孩子

找到一些庇护所。法尔茅斯的房子被剥离并出售;此外，穆斯普拉特夫

人已经离开了这个地方，对她的新机构进行了一些合理的相当大的谈

话;他们无法返回那里。她不得不匆匆忙忙地把她的家具从马奇曼夫人

的房间搬到一个废弃的马车房，并在托基买了一栋带家具的别墅。正

如我所说，她不是一个雄心勃勃的女人，但是，在她的期望被提高得

如此之高之后，突然被降低到如此低的水平令人不安。在村子里，为

新娘入场准备装饰品的工作队开始摘下彩旗上的B，换上女士，抹去

伯爵的点，在彩绘的冠冕上印上球和草莓叶，为马奇曼勋爵的归来做

准备。

News of his intentions came first to the solicitors, then to Cordelia, then

to Julia and me, in a rapid succession of contradictory cables. Lord

Marchmain would arrive in time for the wedding; he would arrive after the

wedding, having seen Lord and Lady Brideshead on their way through

Paris; he would see them in Rome. He was not well enough to travel at all;

he was just starting; he had unhappy memories of winter at Brideshead and

would not come until spring was well advanced and the heating apparatus

overhauled; he was coming alone; he was bringing his Italian household; he

wished his return to be unannounced and to lead a life of complete

seclusion; he would give a ball. At last a date in January was chosen which

proved to be the correct one.

关于他意图的消息首先传到了律师那里，然后传到了科迪莉亚那

里，然后传到了朱莉娅和我那里，一连串相互矛盾的电报接连不断。

马奇曼勋爵会及时赶到婚礼;他会在婚礼结束后到达，在经过巴黎的路

上看到新娘头勋爵和夫人;他会在罗马见到他们。他的身体状况根本无

法旅行;他才刚刚开始;他对布里德斯黑德的冬天有不愉快的回忆，直

到春天来临，取暖设备大修后才来;他独自一人来;他带来了他的意大

利家庭;他希望自己的回归不事先通知，过着完全隐居的生活;他会给

一个球。最后，在一月份选择了日期，事实证明这是正确的日期。

Plender preceded him by some days; there was a difficulty here. Plender

was not an original member of the Brideshead household; he had been Lord

Marchmain’s servant in the yeomanry, and had only once met Wilcox on the

painful occasion of the removal of his master’s luggage when it was

decided not to return from the war; then Plender had been valet, as,

officially, he still was, but he had in the past years introduced a kind of

suffragan, a Swiss body-servant, to attend to the wardrobe and also, when

occasion arose, lend a hand with less dignified tasks about the house, and

had in effect become major-domo of that fluctuating and mobile household;

sometimes he even referred to himself on the telephone as “the secretary.”

There was an acre of thin ice between him and Wilcox.

普兰德比他早了几天;这里有一个困难。普兰德不是布里德斯黑德

家族的原始成员;他曾是马奇曼勋爵在侍从中的仆人，只见过威尔科克

斯一次，那是在主人决定不从战争中回来时搬走主人的行李的痛苦时

刻;那时，普兰德一直是男仆，从官方上讲，他现在仍然是男仆，但在

过去的几年里，他引入了一种女仆，一个瑞士的贴身仆人，来照看衣

柜，并且在机会出现时，伸出援手，做一些不太体面的关于房子的任

务，实际上已经成为那个波动和流动的家庭的主要家庭的主宰;有时他

甚至在电话里称自己为“秘书”。他和威尔科克斯之间有一英亩的薄

冰。

Fortunately the two men took a liking to one another, and the thing was

solved in a series of three-cornered discussions with Cordelia. Plender and

Wilcox became joint grooms of the chambers, like ‘Blues’ and Life Guards

with equal precedence, Plender having as his particular province his

Lordship’s own apartments and Wilcox a sphere of influence in the public

rooms; the senior footman was given a black coat and promoted butler, the

nondescript Swiss, on arrival, was to have plain clothes and full valet’s

status; there was a general increase in wages to meet the new dignities, and

all were content.

幸运的是，两个人互相喜欢，在与科迪莉亚的一系列三方讨论中，

事情得到了解决。普兰德和威尔科克斯成为商会的联合马夫，就像“蓝

调”和救生员一样，具有同等的优先权，普兰德拥有自己的领地，威尔

科克斯在公共房间的势力范围;高级仆人被赋予了一件黑色的外套，并

晋升了管家，不起眼的瑞士人，在抵达时，将穿着便衣和全套男仆的

身份;为了满足新的尊严，工资普遍增加，所有人都很满意。

Julia and I, who had left Brideshead a month before, thinking we should

not return, moved back for the reception. When the day came, Cordelia

went to the station and we remained to greet him at home. It was a bleak

and gusty day. Cottages and lodges were decorated; plans for a bonfire that

night and for the village silver band to play on the terrace, were put down,

but the house flag, that had not flown for twenty-five years, was hoisted

over the pediment, and flapped sharply against the leaden sky. Whatever

harsh voices might be bawling into the microphones of central Europe, and

whatever lathes spinning in the armament factories, the return of Lord

Marchmain was a matter of first importance in his own neighborhood.

茱莉亚和我，一个月前离开了布里德斯黑德，认为我们不应该回

来，于是搬回去参加招待会。当这一天到来时，科迪莉亚去了车站，

我们留下来在家里迎接他。那是一个凄凉而狂风大作的日子。小屋和

小屋进行了装饰;那天晚上的篝火晚会和村里的银乐队在露台上演奏的

计划被搁置了，但二十五年没有飘扬的房屋旗帜被悬挂在山墙上，在

铅色的天空中猛烈地拍打着。无论中欧的麦克风里发出多么刺耳的声

音，无论军工厂里运转着什么车床，马奇曼勋爵的回归在他自己的邻

居中都是头等大事。

He was due at three o’clock. Julia and I waited in the drawing-room

until Wilcox, who had arranged with the stationmaster to be kept informed,

announced “the train is signaled,” and a minute later, “the train is in; his

Lordship is on the way.” Then we went to the front portico and waited there

with the upper servants. Soon the Rolls appeared at the turn in the drive,

followed at some distance by the two vans. It drew up; first Cordelia got

out, then Cara; there was a pause, a rug was handed to the chauffeur, a stick

to the footman; then a leg was cautiously thrust forward. Plender was by

now at the car door; another servant—the Swiss valet—had emerged from a

van; together they lifted Lord Marchmain out and set him on his feet; he felt

for his stick, grasped it, and stood for a minute collecting his strength for

the few low steps which led to the front door.

他三点钟就要到了。茱莉亚和我在客厅里等着，直到威尔科克斯

（Wilcox）与站长约好了随时了解情况，宣布“火车发出信号”，一分

钟后，“火车开进来了;陛下正在路上。然后我们走到前面的门廊，和

上面的仆人一起在那里等着。很快，劳斯莱斯出现在车道的转弯处，

两辆面包车紧随其后。它起草了;先是科迪莉亚下车，然后是卡拉;停

顿了一下，一块地毯递给司机，一根棍子递给脚夫;然后一条腿小心翼

翼地向前推。普兰德此时已经到了车门口;另一个仆人——瑞士男仆

——从一辆面包车里出来了;他们一起把马奇曼勋爵抬了出来，让他站

起来;他摸了摸他的棍子，抓住了它，站了一分钟，为通往前门的几级

低台阶积蓄力量。

Julia gave a little sigh of surprise and touched my hand. We had seen

him nine months ago at Monte Carlo, when he had been an upright and

stately figure, little changed from when I first met him in Venice. Now he

was an old man. Plender had told us his master had been unwell lately: he

had not prepared us for this.

茱莉亚惊讶地叹了口气，摸了摸我的手。九个月前，我们在蒙特卡

洛见过他，当时他是一个正直而庄严的人物，与我第一次在威尼斯见

到他时几乎没有什么变化。现在他已经是个老人了。普兰德告诉我

们，他的主人最近身体不舒服：他没有为我们做好准备。

Lord Marchmain stood bowed and shrunken, weighed down by his

great-coat, a white muffler fluttering untidily at his throat, a cloth cap pulled

low on his forehead, his face white and lined, his nose colored by the cold;

the tears which gathered in his eyes came not from emotion but from the

east wind; he breathed heavily. Cara tucked in the end of his muffler and

whispered something to him. He raised a gloved hand—a schoolboy’s glove

of gray wool—and made a small, weary gesture of greeting to the group at

the door; then, very slowly, with his eyes on the ground before him, he

made his way into the house.

马奇曼勋爵弓着身子站着，缩着身子，被他的大衣压得喘不过气

来，喉咙里不整齐地飘动着一个白色的消音器，额头上戴着一顶低矮

的布帽，他的脸色苍白而皱巴巴的，他的鼻子被寒冷染红了;他眼中聚

集的泪水不是来自情感，而是来自东风;他呼吸沉重。卡拉塞进消音器

的一端，低声对他说了些什么。他举起一只戴着手套的手——一只小

学生的灰色羊毛手套——做了一个小小的、疲惫的手势，向门口的一

群人打招呼;然后，他非常缓慢地，眼睛盯着面前的地面，走进了房

子。

They took off his coat and cap and muffler and the kind of leather jerkin

which he wore under them; thus stripped he seemed more than ever wasted

but more elegant; he had cast the shabbiness of extreme fatigue. Cara

straightened his tie; he wiped his eyes with a bandanna handkerchief and

shuffled with his stick to the hall fire.

他们脱下了他的外套、帽子和围巾，以及他穿在里面的那种皮夹

克;这样脱光衣服，他似乎比以往任何时候都更浪费，但更优雅;他已

经投下了极度疲惫的破旧。卡拉理了理领带;他用头巾手帕擦了擦眼

睛，然后用棍子拖着棍子走到大厅的火堆上。

There was a little heraldic chair by the chimney-piece, one of a set

which stood against the walls, a little, inhospitable, flat-seated thing, a mere

excuse for the elaborate armorial painting on its back, on which, perhaps,

no one, not even a weary footman, had ever sat since it was made; there

Lord Marchmain sat and wiped his eyes.

烟囱旁边有一把小小的纹章椅，是靠墙摆放的一套椅子，是一把小

小的、荒凉的、平坐的东西，只是它背上那幅精美的军械画的借口，

也许，自从它制作出来以来，没有人坐过，甚至连一个疲惫的脚夫都

没有坐过;马奇曼勋爵坐在那里擦了擦眼睛。

“It’s the cold,” he said. “I’d forgotten how cold it is in England. Quite

bowled me over.”

“很冷，”他说。“我忘记了英格兰有多冷。把我打倒了。

“Can I get you anything, my lord?”

“大人，我能给你点什么吗？”

“Nothing, thank you. Cara, where are those confounded pills?”

“没什么，谢谢。卡拉，那些混淆不清的药丸在哪里？

“Alex, the doctor said not more than three times a day.”

“亚历克斯，医生说每天不超过三次。”

“Damn the doctor. I feel quite bowled over.”

“该死的医生。我感觉很疲惫。

Cara produced a blue bottle from her bag and Lord Marchmain took a

pill. Whatever was in it, seemed to revive him. He remained seated, his long

legs stuck out before him, his cane between them, his chin on its ivory

handle, but he began to take notice of us all, to greet us and to give orders.

卡拉从包里拿出一个蓝色的瓶子，马奇曼勋爵吃了一颗药丸。无论

里面有什么，似乎都让他复活了。他仍然坐着，他的长腿在他面前伸

出，他的拐杖夹在两腿之间，他的下巴放在象牙柄上，但他开始注意

到我们所有人，向我们打招呼并发号施令。

“I’m afraid I’m not at all the thing today; the journey’s taken it out of

me. Ought to have waited a night at Dover. Wilcox, what rooms have you

prepared for me?”

“恐怕我今天根本不是那个东西;这段旅程把我带走了。应该在多佛

等一晚。威尔科克斯，你为我准备了什么房间？

“Your old ones, my Lord.”

“你的老家伙，我的主。”

“Won’t do; not till I’m fit again. Too many stairs; must be on the ground

floor. Plender, get a bed made up for me downstairs.”

“不行;直到我恢复健康。楼梯太多;必须在一楼。Plender，在楼下给

我整理一张床。

Plender and Wilcox exchanged an anxious glance.

Plender和Wilcox焦急地交换了一个眼神。

“Very good, my Lord. Which room shall we put it in?”

“很好，我的主。我们该把它放在哪个房间里呢？

Lord Marchmain thought for a moment. “The Chinese drawing-room;

and, Wilcox, the ‘Queen’s bed.’ ”

马奇曼勋爵想了一会儿。“中国客厅;以及威尔科克斯，“女王的

床”。"

“The Chinese drawing-room, my lord, the ‘Queen’s bed’?”

“中国客厅，大人，'女王的床'？”

“Yes, yes. I may be spending some time there in the next few weeks.”

“是的，是的。在接下来的几周里，我可能会在那里呆一段时间。

The Chinese drawing-room was one I had never seen used; in fact one

could not normally go further into it than a small roped area round the door,

where sight-seers were corralled on the days the house was open to the

public; it was a splendid, uninhabitable museum of Chippendale carving

and porcelain and lacquer and painted hangings; the Queen’s bed, too, was

an exhibition piece, a vast velvet tent like the baldachino at St. Peter’s. Had

Lord Marchmain planned this lying-in-state for himself, I wondered, before

he left the sunshine of Italy? Had he thought of it during the scudding rain

of his long, fretful journey? Had it come to him at that moment, an

awakened memory of childhood, a dream in the nursery—“When I’m

grown up I’ll sleep in the Queen’s bed in the Chinese drawing-room”—the

apotheosis of adult grandeur?

中国客厅是我从未见过的;事实上，人们通常不能比门周围的一个

小绳索区域更进一步，在房子向公众开放的日子里，观光者被围困在

那里;这是一个辉煌的、无法居住的齐本德尔雕刻、瓷器、漆器和彩绘

帷幔博物馆;女王的床也是一件展品，一个巨大的天鹅绒帐篷，就像圣

彼得大教堂的baldachino一样。我想知道，马奇曼勋爵在离开意大利的

阳光之前，是否为自己计划了这种躺卧状态？在他漫长而烦躁的旅程

中，他有没有想过这一点？那一刻，他是否想到了童年的觉醒记忆，

托儿所里的梦——“长大后，我会睡在中国客厅的女王床上”——成人

宏伟的典范？

Few things, certainly, could have caused more stir in the house. What

had been foreseen as a day of formality became one of fierce exertion;

housemaids began making a fire, removing covers, unfolding linen; men in

aprons, never normally seen, shifted furniture; the estate carpenters were

collected to dismantle the bed. It came down the main staircase in pieces, at

intervals during the afternoon; huge sections of Rococo, velvet-covered

cornice; the twisted, gilt and velvet columns which formed its posts; beams

of unpolished wood, made not to be seen, which performed invisible,

structural functions below the draperies; plumes of dyed feathers, which

sprang from gold-mounted ostrich eggs and crowned the canopy; finally,

the mattresses with four toiling men to each. Lord Marchmain seemed to

derive comfort from the consequences of his whim; he sat by the fire

watching the bustle, while we stood in a half circle—Cara, Cordelia, Julia,

and I—and talked to him.

当然，很少有事情能在房子里引起更大的轰动。原本以为是正式的

一天变成了激烈的劳累;女仆们开始生火，取下被子，展开亚麻布;平

时从未见过的围裙男人正在移动家具;庄园的木匠被召集来拆除床。它

从主楼梯上下来，在下午每隔一段时间就下来;洛可可式的大片，天鹅

绒覆盖的飞檐;扭曲的、镀金的和天鹅绒的柱子组成了它的柱子;未经

抛光的木梁，看不见，在窗帘下方发挥看不见的结构功能;染色的羽

毛，从镶金的鸵鸟蛋中长出，为树冠加冕;最后，床垫上有四个辛苦的

男人。马奇曼勋爵似乎从他一时兴起的后果中得到了安慰;他坐在篝火

旁看着熙熙攘攘的景象，而我们则站成半圈——卡拉、科迪莉亚、茱

莉亚和我——和他说话。

Color came back to his cheeks and light to his eyes. “Brideshead and his

wife dined with me in Rome,” he said. “Since we are all members of the

family”—and his eye moved ironically from Cara to me—“I can speak

without reserve. I found her deplorable. Her former consort, I understand,

was a seafaring man and, presumably, the less exacting, but how my son, at

the ripe age of thirty-eight, with, unless things have changed very much, a

very free choice among the women of England, can have settled on—I

suppose I must call her so—Beryl…” He left the sentence eloquently

unfinished.

他的脸颊恢复了颜色，眼睛恢复了光亮。“布里德斯黑德和他的妻

子在罗马和我一起吃饭，”他说。“既然我们都是家庭的一员，”他的目

光讽刺地从卡拉身上移到我身上，“我可以毫无保留地说话。我觉得她

很可悲。据我所知，她以前的配偶是个航海家，而且大概是不太苛刻

的，但是我的儿子，在三十八岁的时候，除非情况发生了很大的变

化，否则在英国的女人中有一个非常自由的选择，怎么可能安顿下来

——我想我应该这样称呼她——贝丽尔......”他雄辩地留下了这句话。

Lord Marchmain showed no inclination to move, so presently we drew

up chairs—the little, heraldic chairs, for everything else in the hall was

ponderous—and sat round him.

马奇曼勋爵没有动弹的倾向，所以现在我们拉了椅子——小小的纹

章椅，因为大厅里的其他东西都很沉重——围着他坐下。

“I daresay I shall not be really fit again until summer comes,” he said. “I

look to you four to amuse me.”

“我敢说，在夏天到来之前，我不会真正恢复健康，”他说。“我指

望你们四个逗我开心。”

There seemed little we could do at the moment to lighten the rather

somber mood; he, indeed, was the most cheerful of us. “Tell me,” he said,

“the circumstances of Brideshead’s courtship.”

目前，我们似乎无能为力，无法减轻这种相当阴郁的情绪;他确实

是我们中最开朗的。“告诉我，”他说，“布里兹黑德求爱的情况。

We told him what we knew.

我们告诉了他我们所知道的。

“Match-boxes,” he said. “Match-boxes. I think she’s past child-bearing.”

“火柴盒，”他说。“火柴盒。我想她已经过了生育期。

Tea was brought us at the hall fireplace.

茶被带到大厅的壁炉旁。

“In Italy,” he said, “no one believes there will be a war. They think it

will all be ‘arranged.’ I suppose, Julia, you no longer have access to

political information? Cara, here, is fortunately a British subject by

marriage. It is not a thing she customarily mentions, but it may prove

valuable. She is legally Mrs. Hicks, are you not, my dear? We know little of

Hicks, but we shall be grateful to him, none the less, if it comes to war. And

you,” he said, turning the attack to me, “you will no doubt become an

official artist?”

“在意大利，”他说，“没有人相信会有战争。他们认为这一切都会

被“安排”好。我想，茱莉亚，你再也无法获得政治信息了吗？幸运的

是，卡拉在这里是英国的臣民。这不是她习惯性提及的事情，但它可

能被证明是有价值的。她在法律上是希克斯夫人，你不是吗，亲爱

的？我们对希克斯知之甚少，但如果涉及到战争，我们将对他心存感

激。而你，“他说，把攻击转向我，”你无疑会成为一名正式的艺术

家？

“No. As a matter of fact I am negotiating now for a commission in the

Special Reserve.”

“不。事实上，我现在正在谈判在特别储备中设立一个委员会。

“Oh, but you should be an artist. I had one with my squadron during the

last war, for weeks—until we went up to the line.”

“哦，但你应该是一个艺术家。在上一次战争中，我和我的中队一

起度过了几个星期，直到我们上线。

This waspishness was new. I had always been aware of a frame of

malevolence under his urbanity; now it protruded like his own sharp bones

through the sunken skin.

这种黄蜂是新的。我一直都知道，在他都市的性格下，有一种恶意

的框架;现在它像他自己锋利的骨头一样从凹陷的皮肤中伸出来。

It was dark before the bed was finished; we went to see it, Lord

Marchmain stepping quite briskly now through the intervening rooms.

床还没铺完，天就黑了;我们去看了，马奇曼勋爵现在非常轻快地

穿过中间的房间。

“I congratulate you. It really looks remarkably well. Wilcox, I seem to

remember a silver basin and ewer—they stood in a room we called “the

Cardinal’s dressing-room”, I think—suppose we had them here on the

console. Then if you will send Plender and Gaston to me, the luggage can

wait till tomorrow—simply the dressing case and what I need for the night.

Plender will know. If you will leave me with Plender and Gaston, I will go

to bed. We will meet later; you will dine here and keep me amused.”

“我祝贺你。它看起来真的非常好。威尔科克斯，我似乎记得一个

银盆和水壶——它们站在一个我们称之为“红衣主教更衣室”的房间

里，我想——假设我们把它们放在控制台上。然后，如果你把普兰德

和加斯顿送到我这里来，行李可以等到明天——只要梳妆盒和我晚上

需要的东西。Plender 会知道的。如果你把我留给普兰德和加斯顿，我

就上床睡觉了。我们稍后会见;你会在这里吃饭，让我开心。

We turned to go; as I was at the door he called me back.

我们转身要走;当我在门口时，他叫我回来。

“It looks very well, does it not?”

“看起来很不错，不是吗？”

“Very well.”

“很好。”

“You might paint it, eh—and call it the Death Bed?”

“你可以把它画出来，呃——然后叫它《临终之床》？”

“Yes,” said Cara, “he has come home to die.”

“是的，”卡拉说，“他回家死了。

“But when he first arrived he was talking so confidently of recovery.”

“但当他第一次来到这里时，他非常自信地谈论康复。

“That was because he was so ill. When he is himself, he knows he is

dying and accepts it. His sickness is up and down; one day, sometimes for

several days on end, he is strong and lively and then he is ready for death,

then he is down and afraid. I do not know how it will be when he is more

and more down. That must come in good time. The doctors in Rome gave

him less than a year. There is someone coming from London, I think

tomorrow, who will tell us more.”

“那是因为他病得很重。当他做他自己时，他知道自己快要死了，

并接受了它。他的病有起有落;有一天，有时连续几天，他很强壮，很

活泼，然后他准备好了死亡，然后他沮丧和害怕。我不知道当他越来

越沮丧时会怎么样。这必须及时到来。罗马的医生给了他不到一年的

时间。我想明天会有人从伦敦来，他会告诉我们更多。

“What is it?”

“这是什么？”

“His heart; some long word at the heart. He is dying of a long word.”

“他的心;一些长话在心里。他快要死了。

That evening Lord Marchmain was in good spirits; the room had a

Hogarthian aspect, with the dinner-table set for the four of us by the

grotesque, chinoiserie chimney-piece, and the old man propped among his

pillows, sipping champagne, tasting, praising, and failing to eat, the

succession of dishes which had been prepared for his homecoming. Wilcox

had brought out for the occasion the gold plate, which I had not before seen

in use; that, the gilt mirrors, and the lacquer and the drapery of the great bed

and Julia’s mandarin coat gave the scene an air of pantomime, of Aladdin’s

cave.

那天晚上，马奇曼勋爵精神抖擞;房间里有一种霍加斯式的一面，

餐桌上摆着我们四个人的餐桌，旁边是怪诞的中国风烟囱，老人靠在

枕头上，啜饮着香槟，品尝着，赞美着，却没有吃下，一连串为他回

家准备的菜肴。威尔科克斯为这次活动拿出了我以前从未见过的金板;

镀金的镜子，大床的漆和帷幔，以及茱莉亚的柑橘大衣，给这个场景

带来了一种哑剧的气氛，阿拉丁的洞穴。

Just at the end, when the time came for us to go, his spirits flagged.

就在最后，当我们离开的时候到了，他的精神萎靡不振。

“I shall not sleep,” he said. “Who is going to sit with me? Cara,

carissima, you are fatigued. Cordelia, will you watch for an hour in this

Gethsemane?”

“我不睡觉，”他说。“谁会和我坐在一起？卡拉，卡里西玛，你累

了。科黛莉亚，你愿意在客西马尼园里守一个小时吗？

Next morning I asked her how the night had passed.

第二天早上，我问她晚上过得怎么样。

“He went to sleep almost at once. I came in to see him at two to make up

the fire; the lights were on, but he was asleep again. He must have woken

up and turned them on; he had to get out of bed to do that. I think perhaps

he is afraid of the dark.”

“他几乎一下子就睡着了。我两点进来见他，补火;灯亮着，但他又

睡着了。他一定是醒了，打开了它们;他必须起床才能做到这一点。我

想也许他害怕黑暗。

It was natural, with her hospital experience, that Cordelia should take

charge of her father. When the doctors came that day they gave their

instructions to her, instinctively.

以她的医院经验，科迪莉亚很自然地应该负责她的父亲。当那天医

生来的时候，他们本能地向她下达了指示。

“Until he gets worse,” she said, “I and the valet can look after him. We

don’t want nurses in the house before they are needed.”

“直到他变得更糟，”她说，“我和男仆可以照顾他。我们不希望在

需要护士之前就把护士留在家中。

At this stage the doctors had nothing to recommend except to keep him

comfortable and administer certain drugs when his attacks came on.

在这个阶段，医生没有什么可推荐的，只是让他保持舒适，并在他

发作时服用某些药物。

“How long will it be?”

“要多久？”

“Lady Cordelia, there are men walking about in hearty old age whom

their doctors gave a week to live. I have learned one thing in medicine;

never prophesy.”

“科黛莉亚夫人，有些男人在丰盛的晚年走来走去，他们的医生给

了他们一个星期的生命。我在医学上学到了一件事;永远不要预言。

These two men had made a long journey to tell her this; the local doctor

was there to accept the same advice in technical phrases.

这两个人长途跋涉才告诉她这件事;当地医生在那里接受了同样的

技术用语建议。

That night Lord Marchmain reverted to the topic of his new daughter-in-

law; it had never been long out of his mind, finding expression in various

sly hints throughout the day; now he lay back in his pillows and talked of

her at length.

那天晚上，马奇曼勋爵又回到了他的新儿媳的话题上。它从未从他

的脑海中消失太久，一整天都在各种狡猾的暗示中寻找表达;现在他躺

在枕头上，长篇大论地谈论着她。

“I have never been much moved by family piety until now,” he said,

“but I am frankly appalled at the prospect of—of Beryl taking what was

once my mother’s place in this house. Why should that uncouth pair sit here

childless while the place crumbles about their ears? I will not disguise from

you that I have taken a dislike to Beryl.

“直到现在，我从未被家庭的虔诚所感动，”他说，“但坦率地说，

我对Beryl取代我母亲在这所房子中的位置的前景感到震惊。为什么那

对粗鲁的夫妇要坐在这里没有孩子，而这个地方在他们的耳朵周围崩

溃？我不会向你隐瞒我不喜欢绿柱石。

“Perhaps it was unfortunate that we met in Rome. Anywhere else might

have been more sympathetic. And yet, if one comes to consider it, where

could I have met her without repugnance? We dined at Ranieri’s; it is a

quiet little restaurant I have frequented for years—no doubt you know it.

Beryl seemed to fill the place. I, of course, was host, though to hear Beryl

press my son with food, you might have thought otherwise. Brideshead was

always a greedy boy; a wife who has his best interests at heart should seek

to restrain him. However, that is a matter of small importance.

“也许我们在罗马相遇是不幸的。其他任何地方可能更有同情心。

然而，如果有人仔细想想，我在哪里能不厌恶地见到她呢？我们在

Ranieri's 用餐;这是我多年来经常光顾的一家安静的小餐馆——毫无疑

问，您知道它。绿柱石似乎填满了这个地方。当然，我是东道主，虽

然听到Beryl用食物压我儿子，你可能不这么认为。新娘头一直是一个

贪婪的男孩;一个把他的最大利益放在心上的妻子应该设法克制他。然

而，这是一个无关紧要的问题。

“She had no doubt heard of me as a man of irregular life. I can only

describe her manner to me as roguish. A naughty old man, that’s what she

thought I was. I suppose she had met naughty old admirals and knew how

they should be humored…. I could not attempt to reproduce her

conversation. I will give you one example.

“毫无疑问，她听说过我是一个生活不规律的人。我只能用流氓来

形容她对我的态度。一个顽皮的老头，她就是这么想的我。我想她见

过顽皮的老海军上将，知道应该如何幽默他们......我无法试图重现她的

对话。我举个例子。

“They had been to an audience at the Vatican that morning; a blessing

for their marriage—I did not follow attentively—something of the kind had

happened before, I gathered, some previous husband, some previous Pope.

She described, rather vivaciously, how on this earlier occasion she had gone

with a whole body of newly married couples, mostly Italians of all ranks,

some of the simpler girls in their wedding dresses, and how each had

appraised the other, the bridegrooms looking the brides over, comparing

their own with one another’s, and so forth. Then she said, ‘This time, of

course, we were in private, but do you know, Lord Marchmain, I felt as

though it was I who was leading in the bride.’

“那天早上，他们去过梵蒂冈的听众;这是对他们婚姻的祝福——我

没有专心致志地关注——以前发生过这样的事情，我聚集了一些以前

的丈夫，一些以前的教皇。她相当生动地描述了在早些时候的这个场

合，她是如何与一大群新婚夫妇一起去的，这些夫妇大多是各个阶层

的意大利人，还有一些穿着婚纱的简单女孩，以及每个人如何评价对

方，新郎如何打量新娘，比较自己的新娘和对方的新娘，等等。然后

她说，“这一次，当然，我们是私下里，但你知道吗，马奇曼勋爵，我

觉得好像是我带了新娘。

“It was said with great indelicacy. I have not yet quite fathomed her

meaning. Was she making a play on my son’s name, or was she, do you

think, referring to his undoubted virginity? I fancy the latter. Anyway, it

was with pleasantries of that kind that we passed the evening.

“这句话说得很不客气。我还没有完全理解她的意思。她是在拿我

儿子的名字开玩笑，还是你觉得她指的是他毫无疑问的童贞？我喜欢

后者。不管怎样，我们就是在这种寒暄中度过了这个夜晚。

“I don’t think she would be quite in her proper element here, do you?

Who shall I leave it to? The entail ended with me, you know. Sebastian,

alas, is out of the question. Who wants it? Quis? Would you like it, Cara?

No, of course you would not. Cordelia? I think I shall leave it to Julia and

Charles.”

“我不认为她在这里会很合适，是吗？我应该把它留给谁？你知

道，这个后果以我结束。唉，塞巴斯蒂安是不可能的。谁想要它？奎

斯？你喜欢吗，卡拉？不，你当然不会。科迪莉亚？我想我应该把它

留给朱莉娅和查尔斯。

“Of course not, papa, it’s Bridey’s.”

“当然不是，爸爸，是布莱迪的。”

“And… Beryl’s? I will have Gregson down one day soon and go over

the matter. It is time I brought my will up to date; it is full of anomalies and

anachronisms…. I have rather a fancy for the idea of installing Julia here;

so beautiful this evening, my dear; so beautiful always; much, much more

suitable.”

“而且......绿柱石的？我很快就会有一天让格雷格森下来讨论这件

事。现在是我更新我的遗嘱的时候了;它充满了异常和不合时宜......我

很喜欢在这里安装朱莉娅的想法;今晚太美了，亲爱的;总是那么美丽;

更合适。

Shortly after this he sent to London for his solicitor, but, on the day he

came, Lord Marchmain was suffering from an attack and would not see

him. “Plenty of time,” he said, between painful gasps for breath, “another

day, when I am stronger,” but the choice of his heir was constantly in his

mind, and he referred often to the time when Julia and I should be married

and in possession.

不久之后，他派人去伦敦找他的律师，但是，在他来的那天，马奇

曼勋爵正在遭受袭击，不会见到他。“时间很充裕，”他痛苦地喘着粗

气说，“改天，我更强壮的时候，”但他的继承人的选择一直在他的脑

海中，他经常提到我和朱莉娅应该结婚并拥有财产的时候。

“Do you think he really means to leave it to us?” I asked Julia.

“你认为他真的想把它交给我们吗？”我问茱莉亚。

“Yes, I think he does.”

“是的，我想他知道。”

“But it’s monstrous for Bridey.”

“但这对布莱迪来说太可怕了。”

“Is it? I don’t think he cares much for the place. I do, you know. He and

Beryl would be much more content in some little house somewhere.”

“是吗？我不认为他太在乎这个地方。我愿意，你知道的。他和

Beryl在某个地方的某个小房子里会更满足。

“You mean to accept it?”

“你是说要接受吗？”

“Certainly. It’s papa’s to leave as he likes. I think you and I could be

very happy here.”

“当然。爸爸想怎么走就走就走。我想你和我在这里会很开心。

It opened a prospect; the prospect one gained at the turn of the avenue,

as I had first seen it with Sebastian, of the secluded valley, the lakes falling

away one below the other, the old house in the foreground, the rest of the

world abandoned and forgotten; a world of its own of peace and love and

beauty; a soldier’s dream in a foreign bivouac; such a prospect perhaps as a

high pinnacle of the temple afforded after the hungry days in the desert and

the jackal-haunted nights. Need I reproach myself if sometimes I was taken

by the vision?

它开辟了一个前景;在大道的转弯处，我第一次看到塞巴斯蒂安的

前景，僻静的山谷，湖泊一个接一个地消失，前景中的老房子，世界

其他地方被遗弃和遗忘;一个属于自己的和平、爱和美丽的世界;一个

士兵在外国露营地的梦想;这样的前景，也许是在沙漠中饥饿的日子和

豺狼出没的夜晚之后提供的圣殿的高峰。如果有时我被异象所吸引，

我需要责备自己吗？

The weeks of illness wore on and the life of the house kept pace with the

faltering strength of the sick man. There were days when Lord Marchmain

was dressed, when he stood at the window or moved on his valet’s arm

from fire to fire through the rooms of the ground floor, when visitors came

and went—neighbors and people from the estate, men of business from

London—parcels of new books were opened and discussed, a piano was

moved into the Chinese drawing-room; once at the end of February, on a

single, unexpected day of brilliant sunshine, he called for a car and got as

far as the hall, had on his fur coat, and reached the front door. Then

suddenly he lost interest in the drive, said ‘Not now. Later. One day in the

summer,” took his man’s arm again and was led back to his chair. Once he

had the humor of changing his room and gave detailed orders for a move to

the Painted Parlour; the chinoiserie, he said, disturbed his rest—he kept the

lights full on at night—but again lost heart, countermanded everything, and

kept his room.

几个星期的疾病过去了，房子的生活跟上了病人摇摇欲坠的体力。

有些日子，马奇曼勋爵穿好衣服，当他站在窗前，或者用男仆的胳膊

在一楼的房间里从一个火堆到另一个火堆，当访客来来往往时——邻

居和庄园里的人，伦敦的商人——打开一包新书并讨论，一架钢琴被

搬进中国客厅;有一次在二月底，在一个出乎意料的阳光明媚的日子

里，他叫了一辆车，走到大厅，穿上皮大衣，到了前门。然后他突然

对驱动器失去了兴趣，说：“现在不行。后。夏天的一天，“他再次挽

住男人的胳膊，被带回椅子上。有一次，他幽默地换了房间，并下达

了搬到彩绘客厅的详细命令;他说，中国风打扰了他的休息——他晚上

一直开着灯——但又一次灰心丧气，把一切都推翻了，并保留了他的

房间。

On other days the house was hushed as he sat high in bed, propped by

his pillows, with laboring breath; even then he wanted to have us round

him; night or day he could not bear to be alone; when he could not speak

his eyes followed us, and if anyone left the room he would look distressed,

and Cara, sitting often for hours at a time by his side against the pillows

with an arm in his, would say, “It’s all right, Alex, she’s coming back.”

在其他日子里，当他高高地坐在床上，靠着枕头，呼吸困难时，房

子里很安静;即便如此，他也想让我们围着他;无论白天还是黑夜，他

都无法忍受孤独;当他不能说话时，他的眼睛会跟着我们，如果有人离

开房间，他会看起来很痛苦，而卡拉经常在他身边坐几个小时，靠在

枕头上，胳膊抱着他的胳膊，会说：“没事，亚历克斯，她回来了。

Brideshead and his wife returned from their honeymoon and stayed a

few nights; it was one of the bad times, and Lord Marchmain refused to

have them near him. It was Beryl’s first visit, and she would have been

unnatural if she had shown no curiosity about what had nearly been, and

now again promised soon to be, her home. Beryl was natural enough, and

surveyed the place fairly thoroughly in the days she was there. In the

strange disorder caused by Lord Marchmain’s illness, it must have seemed

capable of much improvement; she referred once or twice to the way in

which establishments of similar size had been managed at various

Government Houses she had visited. Brideshead took her visiting among

the tenants by day, and in the evenings, she talked to me of painting, or to

Cordelia of hospitals, or to Julia of clothes, with cheerful assurance. The

shadow of betrayal, the knowledge of how precarious were their just

expectations, was all one-sided. I was not easy with them; but that was no

new thing to Brideshead; in the little circle of shyness in which he was used

to move, my guilt passed unseen.

布里德斯黑德和他的妻子度完蜜月回来，住了几晚;那是一段糟糕

的时期，马奇曼勋爵拒绝让他们靠近他。这是贝丽尔的第一次来访，

如果她对几乎曾经是她的家，现在又承诺很快成为她的家没有表现出

好奇心，她就会不自然。Beryl很自然，在她在那里的日子里，她对这

个地方进行了相当彻底的调查。在马奇曼勋爵的疾病引起的奇怪混乱

中，它似乎能够得到很大的改善;她曾一两次提到她访问过的各政府大

楼对类似规模的机构的管理方式。布里德斯黑德白天带她到房客中间

去拜访，晚上，她和我谈起绘画，或和医院的科迪莉亚谈起，或和茱

莉亚谈衣服，愉快地保证。背叛的阴影，知道他们的正义期望是多么

不稳定，都是片面的。我和他们在一起并不容易;但这对布里德斯黑德

来说并不是什么新鲜事。在他习惯移动的羞涩的小圈子里，我的内疚

感在看不见的情况下消失了。

Eventually it became clear that Lord Marchmain did not intend to see

more of them. Brideshead was admitted alone for a minute’s leave-taking;

then they left.

最终，很明显，马奇曼勋爵并不打算看到更多这样的人。布里德斯

黑德被单独请了一分钟的假;然后他们离开了。

“There’s nothing we can do here,” said Brideshead, “and it’s very

distressing for Beryl. We’ll come back if things get worse.”

“我们在这里无能为力，”布里德斯黑德说，“这对贝丽尔来说非常

痛苦。如果情况变得更糟，我们会回来的。

The bad spells became longer and more frequent; a nurse was engaged.

“I never saw such a room,” she said, “nothing like it anywhere; no

conveniences of any sort.” She tried to have her patient moved upstairs,

where there was running water, a dressing-room for herself, a “sensible”

narrow bed she could “get round”—what she was used to—but Lord

Marchmain would not budge. Soon, as days and nights became

indistinguishable to him, a second nurse was installed; the specialists came

again from London; they recommended a new and rather daring treatment,

but his body seemed weary of all drugs and did not respond. Presently there

were no good spells, merely brief fluctuations in the speed of his decline.

糟糕的咒语变得更长、更频繁;一名护士订婚了。“我从来没见过这

样的房间，”她说，“在任何地方都没有这样的房间;没有任何便利。她

试图让她的病人搬到楼上，那里有自来水，有自己的更衣室，一张她

可以“绕着走”的“明智”狭窄的床——这是她习惯的——但马奇曼勋爵

不肯让步。很快，当他白天和黑夜变得难以区分时，第二位护士就被

安置了。专家们又从伦敦来了;他们推荐了一种新的、相当大胆的治疗

方法，但他的身体似乎厌倦了所有的药物，没有反应。目前没有好的

咒语，只有他衰落速度的短暂波动。

Brideshead was called. It was the Easter holidays and Beryl was busy

with her children. He came alone, and having stood silently for some

minutes beside his father, who sat silently looking at him, he left the room

and, joining the rest of us, who were in the library, said, “Papa must see a

priest.”

Brideshead被召唤。那天是复活节假期，Beryl忙于照顾她的孩子。

他独自一人来了，在父亲身边静静地站了几分钟，父亲静静地看着

他，他离开了房间，和我们其他人一起在图书馆里说：“爸爸必须见神

父。

It was not the first time the topic had come up. In the early days, when

Lord Marchmain first arrived, the parish priest—since the chapel was shut

there was a new church and presbytery in Melstead—had come to call as a

matter of politeness. Cordelia had put him off with apologies and excuses,

but when he was gone she said: “Not yet. Papa doesn’t want him yet.”

这不是第一次出现这个话题。在早期，当马奇曼勋爵第一次到达

时，教区神父——自从教堂关闭后，梅尔斯特德就有了一座新的教堂

和长老会——出于礼貌而来拜访。科黛莉亚用道歉和借口让他离开，

但当他离开时，她说：“还没有。爸爸还不想要他。

Julia, Cara, and I were there at the time; we each had something to say,

began to speak, and thought better of it. It was never mentioned between the

four of us, but Julia, alone with me, said, “Charles, I see great Church

trouble ahead.”

茱莉亚、卡拉和我当时都在那里;我们每个人都有话要说，开始说

话，并想得更好。我们四个人之间从未提到过这件事，但茱莉亚单独

和我在一起时说：“查尔斯，我看到教会前方有很大的麻烦。

“Can’t they even let him die in peace?”

“难道他们就不能让他安详地死去吗？”

“They mean something so different by “peace”.”

“他们所说的'和平'的含义如此不同。”

“It would be an outrage. No one could have made it clearer, all his life,

what he thought of religion. They’ll come now, when his mind’s wandering

and he hasn’t the strength to resist, and claim him as a death-bed penitent.

I’ve had a certain respect for their Church up till now. If they do a thing like

that I shall know that everything stupid people say about them is quite true

—that it’s all superstition and trickery.” Julia said nothing. “Don’t you

agree?” Still Julia said nothing. “Don’t you agree?”

“这将是一种愤怒。在他的一生中，没有人能更清楚地表达他对宗

教的看法。当他的思想徘徊，他没有力量反抗时，他们会来，并声称

他是一个临终忏悔者。到目前为止，我对他们的教会有一定的尊重。

如果他们做这样的事情，我就会知道，愚蠢的人对他们所说的一切都

是真的——这都是迷信和诡计。茱莉亚什么也没说。“你不同意吗？”

茱莉亚仍然什么也没说。“你不同意吗？”

“I don’t know, Charles. I simply don’t know.”

“我不知道，查尔斯。我根本不知道。

And, though none of us spoke of it, I felt the question ever present,

growing through all the weeks of Lord Marchmain’s illness; I saw it when

Cordelia drove off early in the mornings to mass; I saw it as Cara took to

going with her; this little cloud, the size of a man’s hand, that was going to

swell into a storm among us.

而且，虽然我们谁也谈不上这件事，但我感觉到这个问题一直存

在，在马奇曼勋爵生病的所有星期里都在增长;当科迪莉亚一大早就开

车去做弥撒时，我看到了它;我看到卡拉和她一起去的时候;这朵小小

的云，只有人手掌那么大，在我们中间会膨胀成一场风暴。

Now Brideshead, in his heavy, ruthless way, planted the problem down

before us.

现在，布里德斯黑德以他沉重而无情的方式，把这个问题摆在我们

面前。

“Oh, Bridey, do you think he would?” asked Cordelia.

“噢，布莱迪，你觉得他会吗？”科迪莉亚问。

“I shall see that he does,” said Brideshead. “I shall take Father Mackay

in to him tomorrow.”

“我会看到他这样做的，”布里德斯黑德说。“我明天就带麦凯神父

去见他。”

Still the clouds gathered and did not break; none of us spoke. Cara and

Cordelia went back to the sickroom; Brideshead looked for a book, found

one, and left us.

乌云仍然聚集在一起，没有破裂;我们谁也没说话。卡拉和科迪莉

亚回到了病房;布里德斯黑德找了一本书，找到了一本书，然后离开了

我们。

“Julia,” I said, “how can we stop this tomfoolery?”

“茱莉亚，”我说，“我们怎样才能阻止这种愚蠢的行为呢？

She did not answer for some time; then: “Why should we?”

她有一段时间没有回答;然后：“我们为什么要这样做？

“You know as well as I do. It’s just—just an unseemly incident.”

“你和我一样清楚。这只是——只是一个不体面的事件。

“Who am I to object to unseemly incidents?” she asked sadly. “Anyway,

what harm can it do? Let’s ask the doctor.”

“我有什么资格反对不体面的事件？”她悲伤地问。“不管怎么说，

它能造成什么伤害？我们去问问医生吧。

We asked the doctor, who said: “It’s hard to say. It might alarm him of

course; on the other hand, I have known cases where it has had a

wonderfully soothing effect on a patient; I’ve even known it act as a

positive stimulant. It certainly is usually a great comfort to the relations.

Really I think it’s a thing for Lord Brideshead to decide. Mind you, there is

no need for immediate anxiety. Lord Marchmain is very weak today;

tomorrow he may be quite strong again. Is it not usual to wait a little?”

我们问医生，医生说：“这很难说。当然，这可能会让他感到震惊;

另一方面，我知道它对病人有奇妙的舒缓作用的案例;我什至知道它是

一种积极的兴奋剂。当然，这通常对两国关系来说是一种极大的安

慰。真的，我认为这是布里德斯黑德勋爵决定的事情。请注意，没有

必要立即焦虑。马奇曼勋爵今天非常虚弱;明天他可能又很强壮了。等

一会儿不是很平常吗？

“Well, he wasn’t much help,” I said to Julia, when we left him.

“好吧，他帮不上什么忙，”当我们离开他时，我对朱莉娅说。

“Help? I really can’t quite see why you’ve taken it so much to heart that

my father shall not have the last sacraments.”

“救命？我真的不明白你为什么这么在意，以至于我父亲不会有最

后的圣礼。

“It’s such a lot of witchcraft and hypocrisy.”

“这真是太巫术和虚伪了。”

“Is it? Anyway, it’s been going on for nearly two thousand years. I don’t

know why you should suddenly get in a rage now.” Her voice rose; she was

swift to anger of late months. “For Christ’s sake, write to The Times; get up

and make a speech in Hyde Park; start a ‘No Popery’ riot, but don’t bore me

about it. What’s it got to do with you or me whether my father sees his

parish priest?”

“是吗？无论如何，它已经持续了将近两千年。我不知道你为什么

现在突然大发雷霆。她的声音提高了;最近几个月，她很快就生气了。

“看在基督的份上，写信给《泰晤士报》;起床，在海德公园发表演讲;

开始一场“No Popery”骚乱，但不要让我感到厌烦。我父亲见到他的教

区神父与你或我有什么关系？

I knew these fierce moods of Julia’s, such as had overtaken her at the

fountain in moonlight, and dimly surmised their origin; I knew they could

not be assuaged by words. Nor could I have spoken, for the answer to her

question was still unformed; the sense that the fate of more souls than one

was at issue; that the snow was beginning to shift on the high slopes.

我知道茱莉亚的这些激烈的情绪，比如在月光下在喷泉边追上她，

并模糊地推测它们的起源;我知道他们无法用言语来安抚。我也不能说

话，因为她问题的答案还没有形成;感觉到不止一个人的灵魂的命运受

到质疑;高坡上的雪开始移动。

Brideshead and I breakfasted together next morning with the night-nurse,

who had just come off duty.

第二天早上，我和布里德斯黑德一起吃早餐，和刚下班的夜班护士一

起吃早餐。

“He’s much brighter today,” she said. “He slept very nicely for nearly

three hours. When Gaston came to shave him he was quite chatty.”

“他今天聪明多了，”她说。“他睡了将近三个小时。当加斯顿来给

他刮胡子时，他很健谈。

“Good,” said Brideshead. “Cordelia went to mass. She’s driving Father

Mackay back here to breakfast.”

“很好，”布里德斯黑德说。“科迪莉亚去做弥撒了。她要开车送麦

凯神父回这里吃早餐。

I had met Father Mackay several times; he was a stocky, middle-aged,

genial Glasgow-Irishman who, when we met, was apt to ask me such

questions as, “Would you say now, Mr. Ryder, that the painter Titian was

more truly artistic than the painter Raphael?” and, more disconcertingly

still, to remember my answers: “To revert, Mr. Ryder, to what you said

when last I had the pleasure to meet you, would it be right now to say that

the painter Titian…” usually ending with some such reflection as: “Ah, it’s

a grand resource for a man to have the talent you have, Mr. Ryder, and the

time to indulge it.” Cordelia could imitate him.

我见过麦凯神父好几次;他是一个矮胖的、中年人、和蔼可亲的格

拉斯哥-爱尔兰人，当我们见面时，他很容易问我这样的问题：“莱德

先生，你现在能说画家提香比画家拉斐尔更具有艺术性吗？”更令人不

安的是，还记得我的回答：“莱德先生，回到你上次有幸见到你时所说

的话。现在说画家提香......”通常以这样的反思结束：“啊，莱德先

生，对于一个男人来说，拥有你所拥有的才能和放纵它的时间是一种

巨大的资源。科黛莉亚可以模仿他。

This morning he made a hearty breakfast, glanced at the headlines of the

paper, and then said with professional briskness: “And now, Lord

Brideshead, would the poor soul be ready to see me, do you think?”

今天早上，他做了一顿丰盛的早餐，瞥了一眼报纸的头条，然后用

职业的轻快说：“现在，布里德斯黑德勋爵，你觉得这个可怜的灵魂愿

意见我吗？”

Brideshead led him out; Cordelia followed, and I was left alone among

the breakfast things. In less than a minute I heard the voices of all three

outside the door.

布里德斯黑德领着他出去了;科黛莉亚紧随其后，我独自一人留在

早餐中。不到一分钟，我就听到了门外三个人的声音。

“… can only apologize.”

"...只能道歉。

“… poor soul. Mark you, it was seeing a strange face; depend upon it, it

was that—an unexpected stranger. I well understand it.”

"...可怜的灵魂。标记你，它看到了一张陌生的脸;依靠它，它就是

——一个意想不到的陌生人。我很清楚。

“… Father, I am sorry… bringing you all this way…”

"...父亲，对不起......把你带到这里来......”

“Don’t think about it at all, Lady Cordelia. Why, I’ve had bottles thrown

at me in the Gorbals…. Give him time. I’ve known worse cases make

beautiful deaths. Pray for him…. I’ll come again… and now if you’ll

excuse me I’ll just pay a little visit to Mrs. Hawkins. Yes, indeed, I know

the way well.”

“别想了，科迪莉亚夫人。为什么，我在 Gorbals 被扔过瓶子......给

他时间。我知道更糟糕的案例会带来美丽的死亡。为他祷告......我会再

来的...现在，请原谅我，我去拜访一下霍金斯夫人。是的，确实，我

很熟悉这条路。

Then Cordelia and Brideshead came into the room.

这时，科迪莉亚和布里德斯黑德走进了房间。

“I gather the visit was not a success.”

“我认为这次访问并不成功。

“It was not. Cordelia, will you drive Father Mackay home when he

comes down from nanny? I’m going to telephone to Beryl and see when she

needs me home.”

“事实并非如此。科黛莉亚，麦凯神父从保姆那里下来后，你会开

车送他回家吗？我要打电话给Beryl，看看她什么时候需要我回家。

“Bridey, it was horrible. What are we to do?”

“新娘，太可怕了。我们该怎么办？

“We’ve done everything we can at the moment.” He left the room.

“我们目前已经做了我们能做的一切。”他离开了房间。

Cordelia’s face was grave; she took a piece of bacon from the dish,

dipped it in mustard and ate it. “Damn Bridey,” she said, “I knew it

wouldn’t work.”

科黛莉亚的脸色很严肃;她从盘子里拿出一块培根，蘸上芥末吃

了。“该死的布莱迪，”她说，“我就知道这行不通。

“What happened?”

“发生什么事了？”

“Would you like to know? We walked in there in a line; Cara was

reading the paper aloud to papa. Bridey said, “I’ve brought Father Mackay

to see you”; papa said, “Father Mackay, I am afraid you have been brought

here under a misapprehension. I am not in extremis, and I have not been a

practicing member of your Church for twenty-five years. Brideshead, show

Father Mackay the way out.” Then we all turned about and walked away,

and I heard Cara start reading the paper again, and that, Charles, was that.”

“你想知道吗？我们排着队走进去;卡拉正在大声朗读报纸给爸爸

听。布莱迪说：“我带麦凯神父来见你了”;爸爸说：“麦凯神父，恐怕

你是被误会了。我不是极端的，我已经二十五年没有成为你们教会的

实践成员了。新娘头，给麦凯神父指路。然后我们都转身走开了，我

听到卡拉又开始读报纸了，查尔斯，就是这样。

I carried the news to Julia, who lay with her bed-table amid a litter of

newspapers and envelopes. “Mumbo-jumbo is off,” I said. “The witch-

doctor has gone.”

我把这个消息告诉了茱莉亚，她躺在床头柜上，堆满了报纸和信

封。“嘟��“巫医走了。”

“Poor papa.”

“可怜的爸爸。”

“It’s great sucks to Bridey.”

“这对布莱迪来说真是太糟糕了。”

I felt triumphant. I had been right, everyone else had been wrong, truth

had prevailed; the threat that I had felt hanging over Julia and me ever since

that evening at the fountain, had been averted, perhaps dispelled for ever;

and there was also—I can now confess it—another unexpressed,

inexpressible, indecent little victory that I was furtively celebrating. I

guessed that that morning’s business had put Brideshead some considerable

way further from his rightful inheritance.

我感到得意洋洋。我是对的，其他人都是错的，真理占了上风;自

从那天晚上在喷泉边，我就一直感到茱莉亚和我受到的威胁被避免

了，也许永远消除了;还有——我现在可以承认了——另一个我无法表

达的、无法表达的、不雅的小胜利，我正在偷偷地庆祝。我猜想，那

天早上的生意让布里德斯黑德离他应得的遗产又远了不少。

In that I was correct; a man was sent for from the solicitors in London;

in a day or two he came and it was known throughout the house that Lord

Marchmain had made a new will. But I was wrong in thinking that the

religious controversy was quashed; it flamed up again after dinner on

Brideshead’s last evening.

在这一点上，我是对的;一名男子是从伦敦的律师那里派来的;过了

一两天，他来了，整个房子都知道马奇曼勋爵立下了新的遗嘱。但

是，我错误地认为宗教争议已经平息了;在布里德斯黑德的最后一晚吃

完晚饭后，它又燃起了火。

“… What papa said was, ‘I am not in extremis, I have not been a

practicing member of the Church for twenty-five years.’ ”

"...爸爸说的是：'我不是极端的，我已经二十五年没有成为教会的

实践成员了。"

“Not ‘the Church,’ ‘your Church.’ ”

“不是'教会'，而是'你们的教会'。"

“I don’t see the difference.”

“我看不出有什么区别。”

“There’s every difference.”

“这完全是不同的。”

“Bridey, it’s quite plain what he meant.”

“布莱迪，他的意思很清楚。”

“I presume he meant what he said. He meant that he had not been

accustomed regularly to receive the sacraments, and since he was not at the

moment dying, he did not mean to change his ways—yet.”

“我猜他是认真的。他的意思是，他不习惯定期领受圣餐，而且由

于他现在还没有死去，所以他还没有改变自己的方式的意思。

“That’s simply a quibble.”

“这简直就是狡辩。”

“Why do people always think that one is quibbling when one tries to be

precise? His plain meaning was that he did not want to see a priest that day,

but that he would when he was ‘in extremis.’ ”

“为什么人们总是认为一个人在狡辩，而一个人试图做到精确？他

的直白意思是，那天他不想见到神父，但当他“处于极端状态”时，他

会去见。"

“I wish someone would explain to me,” I said, “quite what the

significance of these sacraments is. Do you mean that if he dies alone he

goes to hell, and that if a priest puts oil on him—”

“我希望有人能向我解释，”我说，“这些圣礼的意义是什么。你是

说，如果他孤独地死去，他就会下地狱，如果牧师在他身上涂油——”

“Oh, it’s not the oil,” said Cordelia, “that’s to heal him.”

“噢，那不是油，”科迪莉亚说，“那是用来治病的。

“Odder still—well, whatever it is the priest does—that he then goes to

heaven. Is that what you believe?”

“更奇怪的是——好吧，不管牧师做什么——他都会去天堂。你是

这么相信的吗？

Cara then interposed: “I think my nurse told me, someone did anyway,

that if the priest got there before the body was cold it was all right. That’s

so, isn’t it?”

卡拉接着插话说：“我想我的护士告诉我，无论如何都有人告诉

我，如果牧师在尸体变冷之前到达那里，那就没事了。是这样，不是

吗？

The others turned on her.

其他人都转向了她。

“No, Cara, it’s not.”

“不，卡拉，不是。”

“Of course not.”

“当然不是。”

“You’ve got it all wrong, Cara.”

“你都错了，卡拉。”

“Well, I remember when Alphonse de Grenet died, Madame de Grenet

had a priest hidden outside the door—he couldn’t bear the sight of a priest

—and brought him in before the body was cold; she told me herself, and

they had a full Requiem for him, and I went to it.”

“嗯，我记得阿尔方斯·德·格雷内死的时候，德·格雷内夫人把一个牧

师藏在门外——他不忍心看到牧师——在尸体还没冷之前把他带进来;

她自己告诉我，他们为他准备了一首完整的安魂曲，我就去了。

“Having a Requiem doesn’t mean you go to heaven necessarily.”

“拥有安魂曲并不意味着你一定要去天堂。”

“Madame de Grenet thought it did.”

“德·格雷内夫人以为是这样。”

“Well, she was wrong.”

“嗯，她错了。”

“Do any of you Catholics know what good you think this priest can do?”

I asked. “Do you simply want to arrange it so that your father can have

Christian burial? Do you want to keep him out of hell? I only want to be

told.”

“你们天主教徒中有人知道你认为这位神父能做什么好事吗？”我

问。“你只是想安排它，让你的父亲可以有基督徒的葬礼吗？你想让他

远离地狱吗？我只想被告知。

Brideshead told me at some length, and when he had finished Cara

slightly marred the unity of the Catholic front by saying in simple wonder,

“I never heard that before.”

布里德斯黑德长篇大论地告诉我，当他讲完后，卡拉略微破坏了天

主教阵线的团结，他惊奇地说：“我以前从未听说过。

“Let’s get this clear,” I said; “he has to make an act of will; he has to be

contrite and wish to be reconciled; is that right? But only God knows

whether he has really made an act of will; the priest can’t tell; and if there

isn’t a priest there, and he makes the act of will alone, that’s as good as if

there were a priest. And it’s quite possible that the will may still be working

when a man is too weak to make any outward sign of it; is that right? He

may be lying, as though for dead, and willing all the time, and being

reconciled, and God understands that; is that right?”

“让我们把这点说清楚，”我说;“他必须做出意志行为;他必须悔改，

希望和好;是吗？但只有上帝知道他是否真的做出了意志的行为;神父

说不出来;如果那里没有牧师，而他独自做出意志的行为，那就像有一

个牧师一样好。而且，当一个人太软弱而无法做出任何外在迹象时，

意志很可能仍在起作用;是吗？他可能在撒谎，好像死了一样，并且一

直愿意，并且和好了，上帝明白这一点;是这样吗？

“More or less,” said Brideshead.

“或多或少，”布里德斯黑德说。

“Well, for heaven’s sake,” I said, “what is the priest for?”

“好吧，看在老天爷的份上，”我说，“神父是干什么的？

There was a pause in which Julia sighed and Brideshead drew breath as

though to start further subdividing the propositions. In the silence Cara said,

“All I know is that I shall take very good care to have a priest.”

停顿了一会儿，茱莉亚叹了口气，布里德斯黑德深吸了一口气，似

乎要开始进一步细分这些命题。卡拉在沉默中说：“我只知道我会非常

小心地请一位牧师。

“Bless you,” said Cordelia, “I believe that’s the best answer.”

“祝福你，”科迪莉亚说，“我相信这是最好的答案。

And we let the argument drop, each for different reasons, thinking it had

been inconclusive.

我们放弃了争论，每个人都出于不同的原因，认为这是没有定论

的。

Later Julia said: “I wish you wouldn’t start these religious arguments.”

后来茱莉亚说：“我希望你不要开始这些宗教争论。

“I didn’t start it.”

“不是我开始的。”

“You don’t convince anyone else and you don’t really convince

yourself.”

“你无法说服别人，你也无法真正说服自己。”

“I only want to know what these people believe. They say it’s all based

on logic.”

“我只想知道这些人相信什么。他们说这一切都是基于逻辑的。

“If you’d let Bridey finish, he would have made it all quite logical.”

“如果你让布莱迪完成，他会让这一切变得非常合乎逻辑。

“There were four of you,” I said. “Cara didn’t know the first thing it was

about, and may or may not have believed it; you knew a bit and didn’t

believe a word; Cordelia knew about as much and believed it madly; only

poor Bridey knew and believed, and I thought he made a pretty poor show

when it came to explaining. And people go round saying, ‘At least

Catholics know what they believe.’ We had a fair cross-section tonight—”

“你们有四个人，”我说。“卡拉不知道它是关于什么的第一件事，

可能相信也可能不相信;你知道一点，一个字也不相信;科黛莉亚知道

的也差不多，也疯狂地相信了;只有可怜的布莱迪知道并相信，我认为

他在解释方面表现得很差。人们到处说，'至少天主教徒知道他们信仰

什么。我们今晚的横截面很公平——”

“Oh, Charles, don’t rant. I shall begin to think you’re getting doubts

yourself.”

“哦，查尔斯，别咆哮。我会开始认为你自己也怀疑了。

The weeks passed and still Lord Marchmain lived on. In June my divorce

was made absolute and my former wife married for the second time. Julia

would be free in September. The nearer our marriage got, the more

wistfully, I noticed, Julia spoke of it; war was growing nearer, too—we

neither of us doubted that—but Julia’s tender, remote, it sometimes seemed,

desperate longing did not come from any uncertainty outside herself; it

suddenly darkened, too, into brief accesses of hate when she seemed to

throw herself against the restraints of her love for me like a caged animal

against the bars.

几个星期过去了，马奇曼勋爵仍然活着。六月，我的离婚是绝对的，

我的前妻第二次结婚。茱莉亚将在九月获得自由。我们的婚姻越接

近，我就越渴望，我注意到，朱莉娅谈到了它;战争也越来越近了——

我们俩都不怀疑这一点——但茱莉亚温柔的、遥远的、有时看起来是

绝望的渴望并不是来自她自己之外的任何不确定性;它也突然变得黑暗

起来，变成了短暂的仇恨，因为她似乎把自己扔在她对我的爱的束缚

上，就像一只被关在笼子里的动物靠在栏杆上一样。

I was summoned to the War Office, interviewed, and put on a list in case

of emergency; Cordelia also, on another list; lists were becoming part of our

lives once more, as they had been at school. Everything was being got ready

for the coming “Emergency.” No one in that dark office spoke the word

“war” it was taboo; we should be called for if there was “an emergency”—

not in case of strife, an act of human will; nothing so clear and simple as

wrath or retribution; an emergency; something coming out of the waters, a

monster with sightless face and thrashing tail thrown up from the depths.

我被传唤到陆军部，接受面谈，并被列入名单以备不时之需;科迪

莉亚也在另一个名单上;列表再次成为我们生活的一部分，就像在学校

一样。一切都在为即将到来的“紧急情况”做好准备。在那个黑暗的办

公室里，没有人说“战争”这个词，这是禁忌;如果出现“紧急情况”，我

们应该被要求——而不是在发生冲突的情况下，这是人类的意志行为;

没有什么比愤怒或报应更清楚和简单的了;紧急情况;有什么东西从水

里冒出来，一个脸不见、尾巴抖动的怪物从深处抛了上来。

Lord Marchmain took little interest in events outside his own room; we

took him the papers daily and made the attempt to read to him, but he

turned his head on the pillows and with his eyes followed the intricate

patterns about him. “Shall I go on?” “Please do if it’s not boring you.” But

he was not listening; occasionally at a familiar name he would whisper:

“Irwin… I knew him—a mediocre fellow”; occasionally some remote

comment: “Czechs make good coachmen; nothing else”; but his mind was

far from world affairs; it was there, on the spot, turned in on himself; he had

no strength for any other war than his own solitary struggle to keep alive.

马奇曼勋爵对自己房间外的事件不感兴趣;我们每天把报纸拿给他

听，试着读给他听，但他把头靠在枕头上，眼睛跟着他周围错综复杂

的图案。“我可以继续吗？”“如果不让你感到无聊，请做。”但他没有

听;偶尔听到一个熟悉的名字，他会低声说：“欧文......我认识他——一

个平庸的家伙“;偶尔会有人评论说：“捷克人是好马车夫;没有别的了“;

但他的心思远离世界事务;它就在那里，当场，自首;除了他自己为生

存而进行的孤独斗争之外，他没有力量进行任何其他战争。

I said to the doctor, who was with us daily: “He’s got a wonderful will to

live, hasn’t he?”

我对医生说，他每天都和我们在一起：“他有一种奇妙的生存意

志，不是吗？

“Would you put it like that? I should say a great fear of death.”

“你会这样说吗？我应该说对死亡非常恐惧。

“Is there a difference?”

“有区别吗？”

“Oh dear, yes. He doesn’t derive any strength from his fear, you know.

It’s wearing him out.”

“哦，亲爱的，是的。他不会从恐惧中获得任何力量，你知道的。

这让他筋疲力尽。

Next to death, perhaps because they are like death, he feared darkness

and loneliness. He liked to have us in his room and the lights burnt all night

among the gilt figures; he did not wish us to speak much, but he talked

himself, so quietly that we often could not hear him; he talked, I think,

because his was the only voice he could trust, when it assured him that he

was still alive; what he said was not for us, nor for any ears but his own.

在死亡旁边，也许是因为它们就像死亡一样，他害怕黑暗和孤独。

他喜欢把我们留在他的房间里，灯在镀金的人物中间燃烧了一整夜;他

不希望我们多说话，但他自己说话，声音很大，我们常常听不见他的

声音;我想，他说话是因为这是他唯一可以信任的声音，当它向他保证

他还活着时;他说的不是给我们听的，也不是给任何人听的，而是给别

人听的。

“Better today. Better today. I can see now, in the corner of the fireplace,

where the mandarin is holding his gold bell and the crooked tree is in

flower below his feet, where yesterday I was confused and took the little

tower for another man. Soon I shall see the bridge and the three storks and

know where the path leads over the hill.

“今天好多了。今天更好。我现在可以看到，在壁炉的角落里，柑

橘拿着他的金铃铛，他脚下的歪树开着花，昨天我在那里感到困惑，

把小塔当成了另一个人。很快，我就会看到那座桥和三只鹳鸟，知道

那条路通向哪里。

“Better tomorrow. We live long in our family and marry late. Seventy-

three is no great age. Aunt Julia, my father’s aunt, lived to be eighty-eight,

born and died here, never married, saw the fire on beacon hill for the battle

of Trafalgar, always called it ‘the New House’; that was the name they had

for it in the nursery and in the fields when unlettered men had long

memories. You can see where the old house stood near the village church;

they call the field ‘Castle Hill,’ Horlick’s field where the ground’s uneven

and half of it is waste, nettle, and brier in hollows too deep for plowing.

They dug to the foundations to carry the stone for the new house; the house

that was a century old when Aunt Julia was born. Those were our roots in

the waste hollows of Castle Hill, in the brier and nettle; among the tombs in

the old church and the chantry where no clerk sings.

“明天会更好。我们家住得很久，结婚很晚。七十三岁不算什么大

年纪。茱莉亚阿姨，我父亲的阿姨，活了八十八岁，在这里出生和死

亡，从未结婚，在特拉法加战役中看到了烽火山的大火，总是称它为

“新房子”;这是他们在托儿所和田野里给它起的名字，当时没有字母的

男人有很长的记忆。你可以看到老房子在乡村教堂附近的位置;他们称

这片田地为“城堡山”，霍利克的田地，那里的地面不平坦，一半是废

物、荨麻和荆棘，凹陷太深而无法耕作。他们挖到地基上，为新房子

搬运石头;茱莉亚阿姨出生时已经有一百年历史的房子。这些是我们在

城堡山的荒地里，在荆棘和荨麻中的根;在老教堂的坟墓和没有职员唱

歌的圣咏室中。

“Aunt Julia knew the tombs, cross-legged knight and doubleted earl,

marquis like a Roman senator, limestone, alabaster, and Italian marble;

tapped the escutcheons with her ebony cane, made the casque ring over old

Sir Roger. We were knights then, barons since Agincourt, the larger honors

came with the Georges. They came the last and they’ll go the first; the

barony goes on. When all of you are dead Julia’s son will be called by the

name his fathers bore before the fat days; the days of wool shearing and the

wide corn lands, the days of growth and building, when the marshes were

drained and the waste land brought under the plow, when one built the

house, his son added the dome, his son spread the wings and dammed the

river. Aunt Julia watched them build the fountain; it was old before it came

here, weathered two hundred years by the suns of Naples, brought by man-

o’-war in the days of Nelson. Soon the fountain will be dry till the rain fills

it, setting the fallen leaves afloat in the basin; and over the lakes the reeds

will spread and close. Better today.

“茱莉亚姨妈知道坟墓，盘腿骑士和双倍伯爵，像罗马参议员一样

的侯爵，石灰石，雪花石膏和意大利大理石;用她的乌木手杖敲了敲眼

罩，在老罗杰爵士身上戴上了匣子戒指。那时我们是骑士，自阿金库

尔以来是男爵，更大的荣誉来自乔治家族。他们走在最后，他们会走

在前面;男爵继续。当你们都死了，茱莉亚的儿子将用他父亲在胖日子

之前的名字来称呼;剪羊毛的日子和广阔的玉米地，生长和建造的日

子，当沼泽被排干，荒地被犁下时，当一个人盖房子时，他的儿子增

加了圆顶，他的儿子张开翅膀，在河上筑坝。茱莉亚阿姨看着他们建

造喷泉;在它来到这里之前，它已经很古老了，在那不勒斯的太阳下风

化了两百年，在纳尔逊时代由人为的战争带来。很快，喷泉就会干

涸，直到雨水填满它，让落叶漂浮在盆地里;在湖泊上，芦苇会蔓延和

关闭。今天更好。

“Better today. I have lived carefully, sheltered myself from the cold

winds, eaten moderately of what was in season, drunk fine claret, slept in

my own sheets; I shall live long. I was fifty when they dismounted us and

sent us into the line; old men stay at the base, the orders said, but Walter

Venables, my commanding officer, my nearest neighbor, said: “You’re as fit

as the youngest of them, Alex.” So I was; so I am now, if I could only

breathe.

“今天好多了。我小心翼翼地生活，躲避寒风，适度地吃时令的东

西，喝上好的红葡萄酒，睡在自己的床单上;我会长寿的。当他们把我

们下马并送我们上线时，我才五十岁;命令说，老人留在基地，但我的

指挥官，我最近的邻居沃尔特·维纳布尔斯说：“你和他们中最年轻的

一样健康，亚历克斯。所以我是;所以我现在，如果我能呼吸的话。

“No air; no wind stirring under the velvet canopy. When the summer

comes,” said Lord Marchmain, oblivious of the deep corn and swelling fruit

and the surfeited bees who slowly sought their hives in the heavy afternoon

sunlight outside his windows, “when the summer comes, I shall leave my

bed and sit in the open air and breathe more easily.

“没有空气;天鹅绒树冠下没有风吹拂。当夏天来临时，“马奇曼勋爵

说，他忘记了深深的玉米和膨胀的果实，以及被掠夺的蜜蜂，它们在

窗外午后浓烈的阳光下慢慢地寻找它们的蜂巢，”当夏天来临时，我将

离开我的床，坐在露天，呼吸更轻松。

“Who would have thought that all these little gold men, gentlemen in

their own country, could live so long without breathing? Like toads in the

coal, down a deep mine, untroubled. God take it, why have they dug a hole

for me? Must a man stifle to death in his own cellars? Plender, Gaston, open

the windows.”

“谁会想到所有这些小金人，他们自己国家的绅士，可以活这么久

而没有呼吸？就像煤中的蟾蜍，在深矿井下，无忧无虑。老天爷拿去

吧，他们为什么要给我挖坑？一个人必须死在自己的地窖里吗？普兰

德，加斯顿，打开窗户。

“The windows are all wide open, my lord.”

“窗户都开着，大人。”

A cylinder of oxygen was placed beside his bed, with a long tube, a

face-piece, and a little stop-cock he could work himself. Often he said: “It’s

empty; look nurse, there’s nothing comes out.”

他的床边放着一个氧气瓶，里面有一根长管子，一个面罩，还有一

个他可以自己工作的小旋塞。他常说：“它是空的;看护士，什么都没

出来。

“No, Lord Marchmain, it’s quite full; the bubble here in the glass bulb

shows that; it’s at full pressure; listen, don’t you hear it hiss? Try and

breathe slowly, Lord Marchmain; quite gently, then you get the benefit.”

“不，马奇曼勋爵，它已经满了;玻璃灯泡中的气泡表明了这一点;它

处于全压状态;听着，你没听到它的嘶嘶声吗？试着慢慢呼吸，马奇曼

勋爵;很温和，然后你就会得到好处。

“Free as air; that’s what they say—‘free as air.’ Now they bring me my

air in an iron barrel.”

“像空气一样自由;这就是他们所说的——“像空气一样自由”。现在

他们把我的空气装在铁桶里给我。

Once he said: “Cordelia, what became of the chapel?”

有一次他说：“科迪莉亚，教堂怎么样了？

“They locked it up, papa, when mummy died.”

“爸爸，妈妈死了，他们把它锁起来了。”

“It was hers, I gave it to her. We’ve always been builders in our family. I

built it for her; in the shade of the pavilion; rebuilt with the old stones

behind the old walls; it was the last of the new house to come, the first to

go. There used to be a chaplain until the war. Do you remember him?”

“这是她的，我给了她。我们一直是我们家族的建设者。我为她建

造了它;在亭子的树荫下;用旧墙后面的旧石头重建;这是新房子的最后

一个，第一个去的。在战争之前曾经有一位牧师。你还记得他吗？

“I was too young.”

“我太年轻了。”

“Then I went away—left her in the chapel praying. It was hers. It was

the place for her. I never came back to disturb her prayers. They said we

were fighting for freedom; I had my own victory. Was it a crime?”

“然后我走了——留下她在教堂里祈祷。是她的。这是她的地方。

我再也没有回来打扰她的祈祷。他们说我们在为自由而战;我有自己的

胜利。这是犯罪吗？

“I think it was, papa.”

“我想是这样，爸爸。”

“Crying to heaven for vengeance? Is that why they’ve locked me in this

cave, do you think, with a black tube of air and the little yellow men along

the walls, who live without breathing? Do you think that, child? But the

wind will come soon, tomorrow perhaps, and we’ll breathe again. The ill

wind that will blow me good. Better tomorrow.”

“向天哭泣复仇？这就是他们把我锁在这个山洞里的原因吗，你觉

得，有一根黑色的空气管和墙壁上的黄色小人，他们没有呼吸？孩

子，你觉得呢？但风很快就会来，也许明天，我们会再次呼吸。病风

会把我吹得好好的。明天会更好。

Thus, till mid-July, Lord Marchmain lay dying, wearing himself down in

the struggle to live. Then, since there was no reason to expect an immediate

change, Cordelia went to London to see her women’s organization about the

coming “emergency.” That day Lord Marchmain became suddenly worse.

He lay silent and quite still, breathing laboriously; only his open eyes,

which sometimes moved about the room, gave any sign of consciousness.

因此，直到七月中旬，马奇曼勋爵躺在奄奄一息的床上，在为生存

的斗争中疲惫不堪。然后，由于没有理由期待立即改变，科迪莉亚前

往伦敦与她的妇女组织会面，了解即将到来的“紧急情况”。那天，马

奇曼勋爵突然变得更糟了。他静静地躺着，呼吸困难;只有他睁开的眼

睛，有时在房间里走来走去，显示出任何意识的迹象。

“Is this the end?” Julia asked.

“这就结束了吗？”茱莉亚问道。

“It is impossible to say,” the doctor answered; “when he does die it will

probably be like this. He may recover from the present attack. The only

thing is not to disturb him. The least shock will be fatal.”

“这是不可能的，”医生回答说;“当他真的死了，可能会是这样的。

他可能会从目前的攻击中恢复过来。唯一要做的就是不要打扰他。最

小的冲击将是致命的。

“I’m going for Father Mackay,” she said.

“我要去找麦凯神父，”她说。

I was not surprised. I had seen it in her mind all the summer. When she

had gone I said to the doctor, “We must stop this nonsense.”

我并不感到惊讶。整个夏天，我都在她的脑海里看到了这一点。当

她走后，我对医生说：“我们必须停止这种胡说八道。

He said: “My business is with the body. It’s not my business to argue

whether people are better alive or dead, or what happens to them after

death. I only try to keep them alive.”

他说：“我的事是与身体有关。争论人们活着还是死了更好，或者

死后会发生什么，这不关我的事。我只是想让他们活着。

“And you said just now any shock would kill him. What could be worse

for a man who fears death, as he does, than to have a priest brought to him

—a priest he turned out when he had the strength?”

“你刚才说任何电击都会杀死他。对于一个像他一样害怕死亡的人

来说，还有什么比把一个牧师带到他面前更糟糕的呢——一个他在有

力量的时候变成的牧师呢？

“I think it may kill him.”

“我想它可能会杀了他。”

“Then will you forbid it?”

“那你会禁止它吗？”

“I’ve no authority to forbid anything. I can only give my opinion.”

“我无权禁止任何事情。我只能给出我的意见。

“Cara, what do you think?”

“卡拉，你怎么看？”

“I don’t want him made unhappy. That is all there is to hope for now;

that he’ll die without knowing it. But I should like the priest there, all the

same.”

“我不希望他不开心。这就是现在所能希望的;他会在不知情的情况

下死去。但是我应该喜欢那里的牧师，都一样。

“Will you try and persuade Julia to keep him away—until the end? After

that he can do no harm.”

“你会试着说服茱莉亚让他远离——直到最后吗？在那之后，他就

不能造成任何伤害。

“I will ask her to leave Alex happy, yes.”

“我会让她离开亚历克斯开心的，是的。

In half an hour Julia was back with Father Mackay. We all met in the

library.

半小时后，茱莉亚和麦凯神父一起回来了。我们都是在图书馆认识

的。

“I’ve telegraphed for Bridey and Cordelia,” I said. “I hope you agree

that nothing must be done till they arrive.”

“我已经给布莱迪和科迪莉亚打了电报，”我说。“我希望你同意，

在他们到达之前什么都不能做。”

“I wish they were here,” said Julia.

“我希望他们在这里，”朱莉娅说。

“You can’t take the responsibility alone,” I said; “everyone else is

against you. Doctor Grant, tell her what you said to me just now.”

“你不能独自承担责任，”我说;“其他人都反对你。格兰特医生，告

诉她你刚才对我说的话。

“I said that the shock of seeing a priest might well kill him; without that

he may survive this attack. As his medical man I must protest against

anything being done to disturb him.”

“我说过，看到牧师的震惊很可能会杀死他;没有它，他可能会在这

次袭击中幸存下来。作为他的医生，我必须抗议任何打扰他的事情。

“Cara?”

“怎么回事？”

“Julia, dear, I know you are thinking for the best, but, you know, Alex

was not a religious man. He scoffed always. We mustn’t take advantage of

him, now he’s weak, to comfort our own consciences. If Father Mackay

comes to him when he is unconscious, then he can be buried in the proper

way, can he not, Father?”

“茱莉亚，亲爱的，我知道你的想法是最好的，但是，你知道，亚

历克斯不是一个虔诚的人。他总是嗤之以鼻。我们绝不能利用他现在

软弱的他来安慰我们自己的良心。如果麦凯神父在他昏迷的时候来找

他，那么他可以以适当的方式埋葬，不是吗，父亲？”

“I’ll go and see how he is,” said the doctor, leaving us.

“我去看看他怎么样了，”医生说，离开了我们。

“Father Mackay,” I said. “You know how Lord Marchmain greeted you

last time you came; do you think it possible he can have changed now?”

“麦凯神父，”我说。“你知道上次你来的时候，马奇曼勋爵是怎么

迎接你的;你认为他现在有可能改变吗？

“Thank God, by his grace it is possible.”

“感谢上帝，靠着他的恩典，这是可能的。”

“Perhaps,” said Cara, “you could slip in while he is sleeping, say the

words of absolution over him; he would never know.”

“也许，”卡拉说，“你可以趁他睡觉的时候溜进去，对他说一句赦

免的话;他永远不会知道。

“I have seen so many men and women die,” said the priest; “I never

knew them sorry to have me there at the end.”

“我见过那么多男人和女人死去，”神父说;“我从来不认识他们，很

抱歉最后让我在那里。

“But they were Catholics; Lord Marchmain has never been one except in

name—at any rate, not for years. He was a scoffer, Cara said so.”

“但他们是天主教徒;马奇曼勋爵从来就不是名义上的——无论如

何，多年来都不是。他是个讥诮者，卡拉是这么说的。

“Christ came to call, not the righteous, but sinners to repentance.”

“基督来是要呼召，不是义人，而是罪人悔改。”

The doctor returned. “There’s no change,” he said.

医生回来了。“没有变化，”他说。

“Now doctor,” said the priest, “how would I be a shock to anyone?” He

turned his bland, innocent, matter-of-fact face first on the doctor, then upon

the rest of us. “Do you know what I want to do? It is something so small, no

show about it. I don’t wear special clothes, you know. I go just as I am. He

knows the look of me now. There’s nothing alarming. I just want to ask him

if he is sorry for his sins. I want him to make some little sign of assent; I

want him, anyway, not to refuse me; then I want to give him God’s pardon.

Then, though that’s not essential, I want to anoint him. It is nothing, a touch

of the fingers, just some oil from this little box, look it is nothing to hurt

him.”

“现在，医生，”神父说，“我怎么会让任何人感到震惊呢？他把他

那平淡无奇、天真无邪、实事求是的脸先是对医生，然后又对着我们

其他人。“你知道我想做什么吗？它是如此小的东西，没有关于它的表

演。我不穿特别的衣服，你知道的。我照原样去。他现在知道我的样

子了。没有什么可怕的。我只想问他是否为自己的罪孽感到抱歉。我

希望他做出一些小小的同意;无论如何，我希望他不要拒绝我;那么我

想给他上帝的赦免。然后，虽然这不是必需的，但我想膏抹他。没什

么，手指一碰，只是这个小盒子里的一些油，看，没什么能伤害到他

的。

“Oh, Julia,” said Cara, “what are we to say? Let me speak to him.”

“哦，茱莉亚，”卡拉说，“我们该说什么呢？让我和他谈谈。

She went to the Chinese drawing-room; we waited in silence; there was

a wall of fire between Julia and me. Presently Cara returned.

她去了中国客厅;我们静静地等待着;茱莉亚和我之间有一堵火墙。

这时，卡拉回来了。

“I don’t think he heard,” she said. “I thought I knew how to put it to

him. I said: “Alex, you remember the priest from Melstead. You were very

naughty when he came to see you. You hurt his feelings very much. Now

he’s here again. I want you to see him just for my sake, to make friends.”

But he didn’t answer. If he’s unconscious, it couldn’t make him unhappy to

see the priest, could it, doctor?”

“我不认为他听到了，”她说。“我以为我知道如何对他说话。我

说：“亚历克斯，你还记得梅尔斯特德的牧师。当他来看你时，你很顽

皮。你非常伤害他的感情。现在他又来了。我希望你只是为了我而见

到他，结交朋友。但他没有回答。如果他昏迷不醒，见到神父不会让

他不高兴，对吧，医生？”

Julia, who had been standing still and silent, suddenly moved.

一直站着不动，一言不发的茱莉亚突然动了。

“Thank you for your advice, doctor,” she said. “I take full responsibility

for whatever happens. Father Mackay, will you please come and see my

father now,” and without looking at me, led him to the door.

“谢谢你的建议，医生，”她说。“无论发生什么，我都要承担全部

责任。麦凯神父，请你现在来看我父亲，“他没有看我，就把他带到了

门口。

We all followed. Lord Marchmain was lying as I had seen him that

morning, but his eyes were now shut; his hands lay, palm upwards, above

the bed-clothes; the nurse had her fingers on the pulse of one of them.

“Come in,” she said brightly, “you won’t disturb him now.”

我们都跟着。马奇曼勋爵躺在床上，就像我那天早上看到他时一

样，但他的眼睛现在闭上了;他的手掌朝上，放在被褥上;护士用手指

捏着其中一人的脉搏。“进来吧，”她爽快地说，“你现在不会打扰他

了。

“D’you mean…?”

“你是说......？”

“No, no, but he’s past noticing anything.”

“不，不，但他过去什么都没注意到。”

She held the oxygen apparatus to his face and the hiss of escaping gas

was the only sound at the bedside.

她把氧气装置举到他的脸上，气体逸出的嘶嘶声是床边唯一的声

音。

The priest bent over Lord Marchmain and blessed him. Julia and Cara

knelt at the foot of the bed. The doctor, the nurse, and I stood behind them.

神父向马奇曼勋爵弯下腰，祝福他。茱莉亚和卡拉跪在床脚下。医

生、护士和我站在他们身后。

“Now,” said the priest, “I know you are sorry for all the sins of your life,

aren’t you? Make a sign, if you can. You’re sorry, aren’t you?” But there

was no sign. “Try and remember your sins; tell God you are sorry. I am

going to give you absolution. While I am giving it, tell God you are sorry

you have offended him.” He began to speak in Latin. I recognized the

words “ego te absolvo in nomine Patris…” and saw the priest make the

sign of the cross. Then I knelt, too, and prayed: “O God, if there is a God,

forgive him his sins, if there is such a thing as sin,” and the man on the bed

opened his eyes and gave a sigh, the sort of sigh I had imagined people

made at the moment of death, but his eyes moved so that we knew there

was still life in him.

“现在，”神父说，“我知道你为你一生的所有罪孽感到抱歉，不是

吗？如果可以的话，做一个标志。你很抱歉，不是吗？但是没有任何

迹象。“试着记住你的罪;告诉上帝你很抱歉。我要赦免你。当我给它

的时候，告诉上帝你很抱歉你冒犯了他。他开始用拉丁语说话。我认

出了“ego te absolvo in nomine Patris......”这句话。并看到祭司做了十字

架的标志。然后我也跪下来祷告：“上帝啊，如果真有上帝，就饶恕他

的罪，如果真有罪，”床上的人睁开眼睛，叹了一口气，我想象人们在

死亡的那一刻发出的那种叹息，但他的眼睛动了动，让我们知道他里

面还有生命。

I suddenly felt the longing for a sign, if only of courtesy, if only for the

sake of the woman I loved, who knelt in front of me, praying, I knew, for a

sign. It seemed so small a thing that was asked, the bare acknowledgement

of a present, a nod in the crowd. I prayed more simply; “God forgive him

his sins” and “Please God, make him accept your forgiveness.”

我突然感到渴望得到一个标志，哪怕只是出于礼貌，哪怕只是为了

我所爱的女人，她跪在我面前，祈祷，我知道，为了一个标志。这似

乎是一件很小的事情，被问到，对礼物的赤裸裸的承认，人群中的点

头。我祷告得更简单;“上帝饶恕他的罪”和“请上帝，让他接受你的饶

恕。

So small a thing to ask.

这么小的事情要问。

The priest took the little silver box from his pocket and spoke again in

Latin, touching the dying man with an oily wad; he finished what he had to

do, put away the box and gave the final blessing. Suddenly Lord

Marchmain moved his hand to his forehead; I thought he had felt the touch

of the chrism and was wiping it away. “O God,” I prayed, “don’t let him do

that.” But there was no need for fear; the hand moved slowly down his

breast, then to his shoulder, and Lord Marchmain made the sign of the

cross. Then I knew that the sign I had asked for was not a little thing, not a

passing nod of recognition, and a phrase came back to me from my

childhood of the veil of the temple being rent from top to bottom.

神父从口袋里掏出小银盒，又用拉丁语说话，用油浊摸了摸垂死的

人;他完成了他必须做的事情，收起了盒子，并给予了最后的祝福。突

然，马奇曼勋爵把手移到他的额头上;我以为他已经感觉到了圣歌的触

感，正在擦去它。“上帝啊，”我祈祷，“不要让他那样做。但是没有必

要害怕;那只手慢慢地从他的胸膛向下移动，然后移到他的肩膀上，马

奇曼勋爵做了十字架的标志。这时我才知道，我所要的牌子不是一件

小事，不是一句点头的认可，我想起了童年时的一句话，圣殿的幔子

从上到下被撕裂了。

It was over; we stood up; the nurse went back to the oxygen cylinder;

the doctor bent over his patient. Julia whispered to me: “Will you see Father

Mackay out? I’m staying here for a little.”

一切都结束了;我们站了起来;护士回到氧气瓶旁;医生弯下腰来。茱

莉亚低声对我说：“你会见到麦凯神父吗？我要在这里呆一会儿。

Outside the door Father Mackay became the simple, genial man I had

known before. “Well, now, and that was a beautiful thing to see. I’ve known

it happen that way again and again. The devil resists to the last moment and

then the Grace of God is too much for him. You’re not a Catholic I think,

Mr. Ryder, but at least you’ll be glad for the ladies to have the comfort of

it.”

在门外，麦凯神父变成了我以前认识的那个简单、和蔼可亲的人。

“嗯，现在，这是一件美丽的事情。我知道它一次又一次地以这种方式

发生。魔鬼抵抗到最后一刻，然后上帝的恩典对他来说太过分了。我

想你不是天主教徒，莱德先生，但至少你会很高兴女士们能从中得到

安慰。

As we were waiting for the chauffeur, it occurred to me that Father

Mackay should be paid for his services. I asked him awkwardly. “Why,

don’t think about it, Mr. Ryder. It was a pleasure,” he said, “but anything

you care to give is useful in a parish like mine.” I found I had three pounds

in my note-case and gave them to him. “Why, indeed, that’s more than

generous. God bless you, Mr. Ryder. I’ll call again, but I don’t think the

poor soul has long for this world.”

当我们在等待司机时，我突然想到麦凯神父应该为他的服务付费。

我尴尬地问他。“哎呀，别想了，莱德先生。这是一种乐趣，“他说，”

但你愿意给予的任何东西在像我这样的教区都是有用的。我发现我的

笔记本里有三英镑，就把它们给了他。“哎呀，确实，这可真是太慷慨

了。上帝保佑你，莱德先生。我会再打电话的，但我不认为这个可怜

的灵魂对这个世界渴望。

Julia remained in the Chinese drawing-room until, at five o’clock that

evening, her father died, proving both sides right in the dispute, priest and

doctor.

茱莉亚一直待在华人客厅里，直到那天晚上五点钟，她的父亲去世

了，这证明了双方在争执中都是对的，牧师和医生。

Thus I come to the broken sentences which were the last words spoken

between Julia and me, the last memories.

因此，我来到了那些破碎的句子，这些句子是我和茱莉亚之间说的最

后一句话，最后的记忆。

When her father died Julia remained some minutes with his body; the

nurse came to the next room to announce the news and I had a glimpse of

her through the open door, kneeling at the foot of the bed, and of Cara

sitting by her. Presently the two women came out together, and Julia said to

me: “Not now; I’m just taking Cara up to her room; later.”

当她的父亲去世时，朱莉娅在他的尸体上呆了几分钟;护士来到隔

壁房间宣布这个消息，我透过敞开的门瞥见她跪在床脚下，卡拉坐在

她身边。这时，两个女人一起出来了，茱莉亚对我说：“现在不行;我

只是把卡拉带到她的房间;后来。

While she was still upstairs Brideshead and Cordelia arrived from

London; when at last we met alone it was by stealth, like young lovers.

当她还在楼上时，布里德斯黑德和科迪莉亚从伦敦赶来了。当我们

终于单独见面时，就像年轻的恋人一样，是偷偷摸摸的。

Julia said: “Here in the shadow, in the corner of the stair—a minute to

say good-bye.”

茱莉亚说：“在阴影里，在楼梯的角落里——一分钟说再见。

“So long to say so little.”

“这么久，说得这么少。”

“You knew?”

“你知道吗？”

“Since this morning; since before this morning; all this year.”

“从今天早上开始;从今天早上开始;今年都这样。

“I didn’t know till today. Oh, my dear, if you could only understand.

Then I could bear to part, or bear it better. I should say my heart was

breaking, if I believed in broken hearts. I can’t marry you, Charles; I can’t

be with you ever again.”

“直到今天我才知道。哦，亲爱的，如果你能理解就好了。然后我

可以忍受离别，或者更好地忍受。我应该说我的心碎了，如果我相信

破碎的心。我不能嫁给你，查尔斯;我再也不能和你在一起了。

“I know.”

“我知道。”

“How can you know?”

“你怎么知道？”

“What will you do?”

“你会怎么做？”

“Just go on—alone. How can I tell what I shall do? You know the whole

of me. You know I’m not one for a life of mourning. I’ve always been bad.

Probably I shall be bad again, punished again. But the worse I am, the more

I need God. I can’t shut myself out from his mercy. That is what it would

mean; starting a life with you, without him. One can only hope to see one

step ahead. But I saw today there was one thing unforgivable—like things

in the schoolroom, so bad they were unpunishable, that only mummy could

deal with—the bad thing I was on the point of doing, that I’m not quite bad

enough to do; to set up a rival good to God’s. Why should I be allowed to

understand that, and not you, Charles? It may be because of mummy, nanny,

Cordelia, Sebastian—perhaps Bridey and Mrs. Muspratt—keeping my

name in their prayers; or it may be a private bargain between me and God,

that if I give up this one thing I want so much, however bad I am, he won’t

quite despair of me in the end.

“继续吧——独自一人。我怎么知道我该怎么做？你知道我的全

部。你知道我不是一个喜欢哀悼的人。我一直很糟糕。也许我又会变

坏，再次受到惩罚。但我越糟糕，我就越需要上帝。我不能把自己拒

之门外，不受他的怜悯。这就是它的意思;和你一起开始生活，没有

他。人们只能希望看到向前迈出一步。但是我今天看到有一件事是不

可饶恕的——就像教室里的事情一样，太糟糕了，无法惩罚，只有妈

妈才能处理——我正在做的坏事，我还没有坏到可以做;建立一个对上

帝有益的对手。为什么应该让我理解这一点，而不是你，查尔斯？可

能是因为木乃伊、保姆、科迪莉亚、塞巴斯蒂安——也许是布莱迪和

穆斯普拉特太太——在他们的祈祷中保留了我的名字;或者这可能是我

和上帝之间的私下交易，如果我放弃了我非常想要的这一件事，无论

我多么糟糕，他最终都不会对我感到绝望。

“Now we shall both be alone, and I shall have no way of making you

understand.”

“现在我们俩都独处了，我没有办法让你明白。”

“I don’t want to make it easier for you,” I said; “I hope your heart may

break; but I do understand.”

“我不想让你更容易，”我说;“我希望你的心碎;但我确实理解。

The avalanche was down, the hillside swept bare behind it; the last

echoes died on the white slopes; the new mound glittered and lay still in the

silent valley.

雪崩落下，山坡光秃秃的;最后的回声死在白色的山坡上;新的土墩

闪闪发光，静静地躺在寂静的山谷中。

Epilogue

结语

Brideshead Revisited

重访新娘头

The worst place we’ve struck yet,” said the commanding officer; “no

facilities, no amenities, and Brigade sitting right on top of us. There’s one

pub in Flyte St. Mary with capacity for about twenty—that, of course, will

be out of bounds for officers; there’s a Naafi in the camp area. I hope to run

transport once a week to Melstead Carbury. Marchmain is ten miles away

and damn-all when you get there. It will therefore be the first concern of

company officers to organize recreation for their men. M.O., I want you to

take a look at the lakes to see if they’re fit for bathing.”

这是我们迄今为止袭击过的最糟糕的地方，“指挥官说;“没有设施，没

有便利设施，旅就坐在我们上面。Flyte St. Mary 有一家酒吧，可容纳

约 20 人——当然，这对军官来说是无法进入的;营地里有一个Naafi。

我希望每周有一次前往梅尔斯特德卡伯里的交通工具。Marchmain在

十英里外，当你到达那里时，一切都是该死的。因此，连队军官首先

关心的是他们为他们的士兵组织娱乐活动。M.O.，我想让你看看这些

湖，看看它们是否适合洗澡。

Very good, sir.”

很好，先生。

“Brigade expects us to clean up the house for them. I should have

thought some of those half-shaven scrimshankers I see lounging round

Headquarters might have saved us the trouble; however…. Ryder, you will

find a fatigue party of fifty and report to the Quartering Commandant at the

house at 1045 hours; he’ll show you what we’re taking over.”

“旅希望我们为他们清理房子。我本来应该想到，我看到的那些胡

子拉碴的人在总部里闲逛，也许可以省去我们的麻烦;然而。。。。莱

德，你会发现一个五十人的疲劳队，并在 1045 时向家里的营房指挥官

报告;他会告诉你我们正在接管什么。

“Very good, sir.”

“很好，先生。”

“Our predecessors do not seem to have been very enterprising. The

valley has great potentialities for an assault course and a mortar range.

Weapon-training officer, make a recce this morning and get something laid

on before Brigade arrives.”

“我们的前任似乎不是很有进取心。山谷在突击路线和迫击炮射程

方面具有巨大的潜力。武器训练官，今天早上先侦察一下，在大队到

达之前把东西放好。

“Very good, sir.”

“很好，先生。”

“I’m going out myself with the adjutant to recce training areas. Anyone

happen to know this district?”

“我自己要和副官一起去侦察训练区。有人碰巧知道这个地区吗？

I said nothing.

我什么也没说。

“That’s all then, get cracking.”

“就这样，开始破解吧。”

“Wonderful old place in its way,” said the Quartering Commandant;

“pity to knock it about too much.”

“美妙的老地方，”营房指挥官说;“可惜敲得太厉害了。”

He was an old, retired, re-appointed lieutenant-colonel from some miles

away. We met in the space before the main doors, where I had my half-

company fallen-in, waiting for orders. “Come in. I’ll soon show you over.

It’s a great warren of a place, but we’ve only requisitioned the ground floor

and half a dozen bedrooms. Everything else upstairs is still private property,

mostly cram-full of furniture; you never saw such stuff, priceless some of it.

他是一位年老的、退休的、重新任命的中校，来自几英里之外。我

们在大门前的空间见面，我让我的半个连队在那里等待命令。“进来

吧。我很快就会带你过去。这是一个很棒的地方，但我们只征用了一

楼和六间卧室。楼上的其他东西仍然是私人财产，大多是塞满的家具;

你从未见过这样的东西，其中一些是无价的。

“There’s a caretaker and a couple of old servants live at the top—they

won’t be any trouble to you—and a blitzed R.C. padre whom Lady Julia

gave a home to—jittery old bird, but no trouble. He’s opened the chapel;

that’s in bounds for the troops; surprising lot use it, too.

“楼顶住着一个看守人和几个老仆人——他们不会给你带来任何麻

烦——还有一只闪电般的R.C.教士，朱莉娅夫人给他一个家——紧张

的老鸟，但没有麻烦。他打开了教堂;这对部队来说是有界限的;令人

惊讶的是，很多人也使用它。

“The place belongs to Lady Julia Flyte, as she calls herself now. She was

married to Mottram, the Minister of what-ever-it-is. She’s abroad in some

woman’s service, and I try to keep an eye on things for her. Queer thing the

old marquis leaving everything to her—rough on the boys.

“这个地方属于朱莉娅·弗莱特夫人，她现在这样称呼自己。她嫁给

了莫特拉姆，不管是什么的部长。她在国外为某个女人服务，我试着

为她留意事情。奇怪的是，老侯爵把一切都留给了她——对男孩们很

粗暴。

“Now this is where the last lot put the clerks; plenty of room, anyway.

I’ve had the walls and fireplaces boarded up you see—valuable old work

underneath. Hullo, someone seems to have been making a beast of himself

here; destructive beggars, soldiers are! Lucky we spotted it, or it would

have been charged to you chaps.

“现在这是最后一个地段放店员的地方;反正房间很大。我把墙壁和

壁炉都用木板封起来了，你看，下面有很有价值的旧作品。Hullo，似

乎有人在这里制造了自己的野兽;破坏性的乞丐，士兵是！幸好我们发

现了它，否则它就会被收取给你们这些家伙。

“This is another good-sized room, used to be full of tapestry. I’d advise

you to use this for conferences.”

“这是另一个大小适中的房间，曾经挂满了挂毯。我建议你用它来

开会。

“I’m only here to clean up, sir. Someone from Brigade will allot the

rooms.”

“我只是来打扫卫生的，先生。旅里的人会分配房间。

“Oh, well, you’ve got an easy job. Very decent fellows the last lot. They

shouldn’t have done that to the fireplace though. How did they manage it?

Looks solid enough. I wonder if it can be mended?

“哦，好吧，你有一份轻松的工作。非常体面的家伙最后一批。不

过，他们不应该对壁炉这样做。他们是如何做到的？看起来足够坚

固。我想知道它是否可以修补？

“I expect the brigadier will take this for his office; the last did. It’s got a

lot of painting that can’t be moved, done on the walls. As you see, I’ve

covered it up as best I can, but soldiers get through anything—as the

brigadier’s done in the corner. There was another painted room, outside

under pillars—modern work but, if you ask me, the prettiest in the place; it

was the signal office and they made absolute hay of it; rather a shame.

“我希望准将会把这个作为他的办公室;最后一个做到了。它有很多

不能移动的画，在墙上完成。正如你所看到的，我已经尽我所能掩盖

了它，但士兵们什么都能通过——就像准将在角落里所做的那样。外

面还有一间粉刷过的房间，在柱子下面——现代作品，但如果你问

我，这里最漂亮的;那是信号局，他们把它弄得干草尽收眼底;反而是

一种耻辱。

“This eyesore is what they used as the mess; that’s why I didn’t cover it

up; not that it would matter much if it did get damaged; always reminds me

of one of the costlier knocking-shops, you know—‘Maison Japonaise’…

and this was the ante-room…”

“这个令人眼花缭乱的东西是他们用来弄乱的;这就是为什么我没有

掩盖它;如果它真的被损坏了，这并不重要;总是让我想起一家更昂贵

的敲门店，你知道的——“Maison Japonaise”......这是前厅......”

It did not take us long to make our tour of the echoing rooms. Then we

went outside on the terrace.

没过多久，我们就参观了回音室。然后我们去了外面的露台。

“Those are the other ranks’ latrines and wash-house; can’t think why

they built them just there; it was done before I took the job over. All this

used to be cut off from the front. We laid the road through the trees joining

it up with the main drive; unsightly but very practical; awful lot of transport

comes in and out; cuts the place up, too. Look where one careless devil

went smack through the box-hedge and carried away all that balustrade; did

it with a three-ton lorry, too; you’d think he had a Churchill tank at least.

“那些是其他队伍的厕所和盥洗室;想不出他们为什么在那里建造它

们;它是在我接手这份工作之前完成的。所有这些都曾经是从前面切断

的。我们在树林中铺设了道路，将其与主车道连接起来;难看但非常实

用;大量的交通工具进出;把这个地方也切开了。看看一个粗心大意的

魔鬼在哪里撞穿了箱子的篱笆，把所有的栏杆都带走了;也用一辆三吨

重的卡车做到了;你会认为他至少有一辆丘吉尔坦克。

“That fountain is rather a tender spot with our landlady; the young

officers used to lark about in it on guest nights and it was looking a bit the

worse for wear, so I wired it in and turned the water off. Looks a bit untidy

now; all the drivers throw their cigarette-ends and the remains of the

sandwiches there, and you can’t get to it to clean it up, since I put the wire

round it. Florid great thing, isn’t it?…

“那个喷泉是我们的房东太太的温柔之地;年轻的军官们过去常常在

客人的夜晚在里面徘徊，它看起来有点磨损，所以我把它连接起来，

把水关掉了。现在看起来有点不整洁;所有的司机都把他们的烟头和三

明治的残骸扔在那里，你不能去清理它，因为我把电线放在它周围。

华丽的好东西，不是吗?...

“Well, if you’ve seen everything I’ll push off. Good day to you.”

“好吧，如果你已经看到了一切，我会推开。祝你有美好的一天。

His driver threw a cigarette into the dry basin of the fountain; saluted

and opened the door of the car. I saluted and the Quartering Commandant

drove away through the new, metaled gap in the lime trees.

他的司机把一根烟扔进喷泉的干盆里;敬了个礼，打开了车门。我

敬了个礼，营房指挥官开车穿过椴树上新的金属缝隙。

“Hooper,” I said, when I had seen my men started, “do you think I can

safely leave you in charge of the work-party for half an hour?”

“胡珀，”当我看到我的手下开始工作时，我说，“你认为我能安全

地让你负责工作队半小时吗？

“I was just wondering where we could scrounge some tea.”

“我只是想知道我们在哪里可以搜刮一些茶。”

“For Christ’s sake,” I said, “they’ve only just begun work.”

“看在基督的份上，”我说，“他们才刚刚开始工作。

“They’re awfully browned off.”

“它们都变成褐色了。”

“Keep them at it.”

“让他们坚持下去。”

“Rightyoh.”

“对了。”

I did not spend long in the desolate ground-floor rooms, but went

upstairs and wandered down the familiar corridors, trying doors that were

locked, opening doors into rooms piled to the ceiling with furniture. At

length I met an old housemaid carrying a cup of tea. “Why,” she said, “isn’t

it Mr. Ryder?”

我没有在荒凉的一楼房间里呆太久，而是上楼，沿着熟悉的走廊漫

步，试着打开锁着的门，打开房间的门，房间里堆满了家具。最后，

我遇到了一个拿着一杯茶的老女仆。“为什么，”她说，“不是莱德先生

吗？

“It is. I was wondering when I should meet someone I know.”

“是的。我想知道我什么时候应该见到我认识的人。

“Mrs. Hawkins is up in her old room. I was just taking her some tea.”

“霍金斯太太在她的旧房间里。我只是给她喝茶。

“I’ll take it for you,” I said, and passed through the baize doors, up the

uncarpeted stairs, to the nursery.

“我帮你拿，”我说，然后穿过白泽门，走上没有地毯的楼梯，来到

托儿所。

Nanny Hawkins did not recognize me until I spoke, and my arrival

threw her into some confusion; it was not until I had been sitting some time

by her fireside that she recovered her old calm. She, who had changed so

little in all the years I knew her, had lately become greatly aged. The

changes of the last years had come too late in her life to be accepted and

understood; her sight was failing, she told me, and she could see only the

coarsest needlework. Her speech, sharpened by years of gentle

conversation, had reverted now to the soft, peasant tones of its origin.

直到我开口，保姆霍金斯才认出我来，我的到来让她有些困惑。直

到我在她的炉边坐了一会儿，她才恢复了往日的平静。在我认识她的

这些年里，她几乎没有什么变化，最近变得非常苍老。过去几年的变

化在她的生命中来得太晚了，无法被接受和理解;她告诉我，她的视力

正在下降，她只能看到最粗糙的针线活。她的讲话经过多年的温柔交

谈而变得尖锐，现在已经恢复到原来的柔和、农民的语气。

“… only myself here and the two girls and poor Father Membling who

was blown up, not a roof to his head nor a stick of furniture till Julia took

him in with the kind heart she’s got, and his nerves something shocking…

Lady Brideshead, too, Marchmain it is now, who I ought by rights to call

her Ladyship now, but it doesn’t come natural, it was the same with her.

First, when Julia and Cordelia left to the war, she came here with the two

boys and then the military turned them out, so they went to London, nor

they hadn’t been in their house not a month, and Bridey away with the

yeomanry the same as his poor Lordship, when they were blown up too,

everything gone, all the furniture she brought here and kept in the coach-

house. Then she had another house outside London, and the military took

that, too, and there she is now, when I last heard, in a hotel at the seaside,

which isn’t the same as your own home, is it? It doesn’t seem right.

"...这里只有我和两个女孩，还有可怜的梅姆布林神父，他被炸死

了，没有屋顶，也没有家具，直到朱莉娅带着她善良的心收留了他，

他的神经有些令人震惊......新娘夫人也是，现在是马奇曼，我现在应该

称她为夫人，但这并不自然，她也是一样。首先，当茱莉亚和科迪莉

亚去打仗时，她带着两个男孩来到这里，然后军队把他们赶走了，于

是他们去了伦敦，他们也没有在他们家里呆过一个月，布莱迪和他可

怜的领主一样，当他们也被炸毁时，所有的东西都消失了，她带到这

里并保存在马车房里的所有家具。然后她在伦敦郊外还有另一所房

子，军方也拿走了，我上次听说她现在在海边的一家旅馆里，这和你

自己的家不一样，是吗？这似乎不对。

“… Did you listen to Mr. Mottram last night? Very nasty he was about

Hitler. I said to the girl Effie who does for me: “If Hitler was listening, and

if he understands English, which I doubt, he must feel very small.” Who

would have thought of Mr. Mottram doing so well? And so many of his

friends, too, that used to stay here? I said to Mr. Wilcox, who comes to see

me regular on the ’bus from Melstead twice a month, which is very good of

him and I appreciate it, I said: “We were entertaining angels unawares,”

because Mr. Wilcox never liked Mr. Mottram’s friends, which I never saw,

but used to hear about from all of you, nor Julia didn’t like them, but

they’ve done very well, haven’t they?”

"...你昨晚听了莫特拉姆先生的话吗？他对希特勒非常讨厌。我对为

我做手术的女孩艾菲说：“如果希特勒在听，如果他懂英语，我怀疑，

他一定觉得自己很渺小。谁会想到莫特拉姆先生做得这么好？他的许

多朋友也曾经住在这里？我对威尔科克斯先生说，他每个月两次定期

从梅尔斯特德坐公共汽车来看我，这对他来说非常好，我很感激，我

说：“我们在不知不觉中招待天使，”因为威尔科克斯先生从来不喜欢

莫特拉姆先生的朋友，我从来没有见过，但过去经常从你们所有人那

里听到，茱莉亚也不喜欢他们，但他们做得很好，不是吗？

At last I asked her: “Have you heard from Julia?”

最后我问她：“你收到茱莉亚的消息了吗？

“From Cordelia, only last week, and they’re together still as they have

been all the time, and Julia sent me love at the bottom of the page. They’re

both very well, though they couldn’t say where, but Father Membling said,

reading between the lines, it was Palestine, which is where Bridey’s

yeomanry is, so that’s very nice for them all. Cordelia said they were

looking forward to coming home after the war, which I am sure we all are,

though whether I live to see it, is another story.”

“来自Cordelia，就在上周，他们仍然在一起，就像他们一直以来一

样，Julia在页面底部给我发送了爱。他们俩都很好，虽然他们说不出

在哪里，但孟布林神父说，从字里行间读出来，是巴勒斯坦，这是布

莱迪的野蛮人所在的地方，所以这对他们所有人来说都很好。科迪莉

亚说，他们期待着战后回家，我相信我们都是这样，尽管我是否能活

着看到它，是另一回事。

I stayed with her for half an hour, and left promising to return often.

When I reached the hall I found no sign of work and Hooper looking guilty.

我和她呆了半个小时，然后离开了，答应经常回来。当我到达大厅

时，我没有发现任何工作的迹象，胡珀看起来很内疚。

“They had to go off to draw the bed-straw. I didn’t know till Sergeant

Block told me. I don’t know whether they’re coming back.”

“他们不得不去拔床稻草。直到布洛克中士告诉我，我才知道。我

不知道他们是否会回来。

“Don’t know? What orders did you give?”

“不知道？你下达了什么命令？

“Well, I told Sergeant Block to bring them back if he thought it was

worthwhile; I mean if there was time before dinner.”

“好吧，我告诉布洛克中士，如果他认为值得的话，就把他们带回

来;我的意思是，如果晚饭前有时间的话。

It was nearly twelve. “You’ve been hotted again, Hooper. That straw

was to be drawn any time before six tonight.”

当时快十二点了。“你又被热了，胡珀。那根稻草将在今晚六点之

前随时抽出。

“Oh Lor; sorry, Ryder. Sergeant Block—”

“哦，洛尔;对不起，莱德。布洛克警长——”

“It’s my own fault for going away…. Fall in the same party immediately

after dinner, bring them back here and keep them here till the job’s done.”

“离开是我自己的错......晚饭后立即参加同一个聚会，把他们带回这

里，把他们留在这里，直到工作完成。

“Rightyoh. I say, did you say you knew this place before?”

“对呀。我说，你说你以前知道这个地方吗？

“Yes, very well. It belongs to friends of mine,” and as I said the words

they sounded as odd in my ears as Sebastian’s had done, when, instead of

saying, “It is my home,” he said, “It is where my family live.”

“是的，很好。它属于我的朋友，“当我说这些话时，它们在我耳中

听起来就像塞巴斯蒂安所做的那样奇怪，他没有说”这是我的家“，而

是说”这是我家人住的地方。

“It doesn’t seem to make any sense—one family in a place this size.

What’s the use of it?”

“这似乎没有任何意义——一个家庭在这么大的地方。它有什么

用？

“Well, I suppose Brigade are finding it useful.”

“嗯，我想旅团觉得它很有用。”

“But that’s not what it was built for, is it?”

“但这不是它建造的目的，是吗？”

“No,” I said, “not what it was built for. Perhaps that’s one of the

pleasures of building, like having a son, wondering how he’ll grow up. I

don’t know; I never built anything, and I forfeited the right to watch my son

grow up. I’m homeless, childless, middle-aged, love-less, Hooper.” He

looked to see if I was being funny, decided that I was, and laughed. “Now

go back to camp, keep out of the C.O.’s way, if he’s back from his recce,

and don’t let on to anyone that we’ve made a nonsense of the morning.”

“不，”我说，“不是它建造的目的。也许这是建造的乐趣之一，就

像有一个儿子，想知道他会如何长大。我不知道;我从来没有建造过任

何东西，我失去了看着我儿子长大的权利。我无家可归，没有孩子，

中年，没有爱，胡珀。他看了看我是不是在搞笑，认为我是不是在搞

笑，然后笑了起来。“现在回营地去，别挡住C.O.的路，如果他回来

了，不要让任何人知道我们早上胡说八道。”

“Okey, Ryder.”

“好的，莱德。”

There was one part of the house I had not yet visited, and I went there

now. The chapel showed no ill-effects of its long neglect; the art-nouveau

paint was as fresh and bright as ever; the art-nouveau lamp burned once

more before the altar. I said a prayer, an ancient, newly-learned form of

words, and left, turning towards the camp; and as I walked back, and the

cook-house bugle sounded ahead of me, I thought:

房子的一部分我还没有去过，我现在去了那里。教堂没有表现出长

期忽视的不良影响;新艺术风格的油漆一如既往地清新明亮;新艺术风

格的灯在祭坛前再次燃烧。我做了一个祈祷，一种古老的、新学的词

语形式，然后离开了，转向营地;当我往回走时，炊事员的号角声在我

面前响起，我想：

“The builders did not know the uses to which their work would descend;

they made a new house with the stones of the old castle; year by year,

generation after generation, they enriched and extended it; year by year the

great harvest of timber in the park grew to ripeness; until, in sudden frost,

came the age of Hooper; the place was desolate and the work all brought to

nothing; Quomodo sedet sola civitas. Vanity of vanities, all is vanity.

“建筑商不知道他们的工作将用于什么用途;他们用旧城堡的石头建

造了一座新房子;年复一年，一代又一代，他们丰富和扩展了它;年复

一年，公园里收获的木材长得成熟了;直到，在突如其来的霜冻中，胡

珀的时代到来了;这个地方是荒凉的，工作都化为乌有;Quomodo sedet

sola civitas.虚荣的虚荣，一切都是虚荣。

“And yet,” I thought, stepping out more briskly towards the camp,

where the bugles after a pause had taken up the second call and were

sounding “Pick-em-up, pick-em-up, hot potatoes,” “and yet that is not the

last word; it is not even an apt word; it is a dead word from ten years back.

“可是，”我想着，迈着轻快的步伐向营地走去，那里的号角在停顿

了一会儿后接过了第二个电话，响起了“捡起来，捡起来，烫手山

芋”，“然而，这还不是最后一句话;它甚至不是一个恰当的词;这是十年

前的一个死词。

“Something quite remote from anything the builders intended, has come

out of their work, and out of the fierce little human tragedy in which I

played; something none of us thought about at the time; a small red flame—

a beaten-copper lamp of deplorable design relit before the beaten-copper

doors of a tabernacle; the flame which the old knights saw from their

tombs, which they saw put out; that flame burns again for other soldiers, far

from home, farther, in heart, than Acre or Jerusalem. It could not have been

lit but for the builders and the tragedians, and there I found it this morning,

burning anew among the old stones.”

“与建造者的意图相去甚远的东西，已经从他们的工作中产生了，

从我所扮演的激烈的小人类悲剧中产生了;当时我们都没有想到的事

情;一盏小小的红色火焰——一盏设计破损的铜灯，在会幕的破铜门前

重新燃起;老骑士们从坟墓里看到的火焰，他们看到火焰熄灭了;这火

焰再次为其他士兵燃烧，他们远离家乡，比阿卡或耶路撒冷更远。如

果不是建筑商和悲剧家，它不可能被点燃，今天早上我在那里发现了

它，在旧石头中重新燃烧。

I quickened my pace and reached the hut which served us for our ante-

room.

我加快了脚步，来到了为我们的前厅服务的小屋。

“You’re looking unusually cheerful today,” said the second-in-

command.

“你今天看起来异常开朗，”二把手说。

About the Author

关于作者

[TK 1 page]

[传统知识 1 页]

Contents
内容
Welcome
欢迎
Dedication
奉献
Foreword
前言
Preface
前言
Prologue
序幕
Book One: Et in Arcadia Ego
第一本书：阿卡迪亚自我中的Et
Chapter One
第一章
Chapter Two
第二章
Chapter Three
第三章

Chapter Four
第四章
Chapter Five
第五章
Book Two: Brideshead Deserted
第二卷：被遗弃的新娘头
Chapter One
第一章
Chapter Two
第二章
Chapter Three
第三章
Book Three: A Twitch upon the Thread
第三册：线程上的抽搐
Chapter One
第一章
Chapter Two
第二章
Chapter Three
第三章
Chapter Four
第四章
Chapter Five
第五章
Epilogue

结语

About the Author

关于作者

版权

US copyright tk

ISBN 978-0-316-21644-9

国际标准图书编号 978-0-316-21644-9